View Full Version : You are a Narrator

February 21st, 2012, 09:55 AM
By some miracle of... something... you, yes you, sitting right there, are now the narrator of [Insert Character You Choose]'s life. You may choose who can hear you and who cannot.

What happens now?


...And little did Kiritsugu know, that by not taking part in Shirou's magecraft studies, Shirou will proceed to attempt to change his nerves into magic circuits, risking his life every time he used his pitiful magic.

Kiritsugu looked up in shock, wondering what that strange voice was. His expressions feel as he tried to analyze who had gotten passed all his defenses so easily, even though there was no one there. He though to himself, "Who is there?" But he didn't dare ask aloud.

Oh, and by not telling Shirou about Ilyasviel, Kiritsugu is prepping Shirou for a whole world of hurt. Little did he know, that the next Holy Grail War will come early and his daughter was going to be participating...

February 21st, 2012, 10:00 AM
The fourth wall is going to be in ruins.

February 21st, 2012, 10:05 AM
Do we get omnipotence/omniscience?

February 21st, 2012, 10:07 AM
The whole "little did X know" being repeated kind of ruins it for me...

February 21st, 2012, 10:09 AM
You get nigh-omniscience to most information pertaining or related to the character. Impossible to have you know everything, or else it'd just be a simple Quest RP or something.

February 21st, 2012, 10:10 AM
The whole "little did X know" being repeated kind of ruins it for me...

Look, if you don't want to participate, then just don't.

February 21st, 2012, 10:12 AM
Wow, this is certainly promising to be unique.

Let's see, so if I try and example...

The knife stabbed into the body again and again, severing the life of the man, and afterwards simply demolishing his corpse. The frenzied youth continued desecrating the body of his friend until it was almost unrecognisable.

It was a good attempt. Had a professional murderer been there, he would have given it a 6.6 out of 10.

"Only 6.6? Stingy!" The young murderer growled. "Fine! The next murder will be 10 times better!"

And thus young Uryuu turned to a life of crime and became a serial killer in a vain attempt to impress the unusual voice in his head.

5 years later...

"Ha!" The now quite older but still young man sprinkled the child's blood over the ritualistic summoning circle. "This one is much, much better! I've been practising!" It had been years, and he'd practised tirelessly in preparation for this day. A child lay near him, bound and gagged, watching his dead parents. It was a truly splendid murder.

7.5 out of 10.


February 21st, 2012, 10:20 AM
Wow, that's like a Deadpool!Ryuunosuke!

That would be so fun to run...!

February 21st, 2012, 10:32 AM
In a world...

February 21st, 2012, 10:37 AM
and Rin actually did know that as a virgin whom had wanted her for pretty much ever that shirou would flat out turn into a jack hammering animal, but being something of a closet M, that was what she had hoped for, shirou had no idea he had just provided weeks of bathtub masturbatory material.

Shirou: wait, what?!


eh heh, this could be fun.

February 21st, 2012, 10:52 AM
So, while we have little real power, our ability to troll is second to none.


It was an early morning at the Tohsaka residence. The young heir, Rin, was not predisposed towards dealing with them.


Or performing anything that required complex thought before eight in the morning. Bleary eyes squinted at a clock, while quiet obscenities played out in her mind. Most of her thoughts could be summed up as It's too damn early to deal with this shit. Abruptly she sat up in bed, her Crest blazing with light while her much wider and more shocked looking eyes searched the room, only to find it empty.

"So where's that racket coming from?" She asked. She briefly considered the possibilities. Kotomine Kirei being respsonsible was first thing she thought of. However, it was a sunday morning, so the Fake Priest was tied up with his preaching at the church. Not that she wouldn't put it past the insufferable man to be able to conduct his sermon while simultaneously making her question her own sanity.

But, she was noting a certain pattern. The strange voice was only reacting to her thoughts. If she thought of something, then it would be 'spoken'. She immediately thought of purple elephants, and was rewarded with evidence that she was correct.

"Well, that was simple." Mystery solved, the young magus proceeded to crawl back under her covers, and slowly fall back asleep. Soon, she would be thinking of nothing at all, and the voice would be mercifully silent.

However, that would be a boring story.

Her eyes screwed shut, trying to ignore the voice. Said voice decided to remind her of an amusing incident from many years ago, involving a certain artifact left in the care of the Tohsaka lineage by their mentor.

"I didn't think about-I'm NOT thinking about that!" However, much like being told not to think about a pink elephant, this had rather the opposite effect. The memory returned to the forefront of her mind. As a young girl, she had been warned by her father not to open a certain chest. As time went by, her curiosity had grown and Rin had asked the Fake Priest if it was safe to open.

"Not thinking about that, not thinking about, not thinking about that." She chanted as the memory continued to play itself out.

The thrice damned Fake Priest had given the box a careful examination, before telling her, with his empty smile (which, in retrospect was her first clue that what was about to happen was not going to be pleasant in any way, shape, or form) that it was perfectly safe and only happened to contain a rather curious artifact. After he left the house, Rin had opened the box.

"Shut up, shut up, shut up!" The girl was now shouting at the completely empty room, like a classic tsundere.

Inside, was a dusty looking pink wand. The young Rin remarked that it looked an awful lot like one of those magical girl wands she saw on TV. Much to her surprise, the wand replied that she looked an awful lot like one of those magical girls she saw on TV, before jumping into her hand. And suddenly, it wasn't Rin holding a talking pink stick, but Magical Girl Kaleido Ruby holding her Wand of Love and Justice!

"I SUPPRESSED THOSE MEMORIES!" Screamed Rin as she jumped out of bed, teeth gnashing in anger, before a look of absolute calm drifted onto her face. She pressed her her finger against the side of her head, like an imaginary gun, and smiled beatifically. "Gandr." Instantly, the spell knocked her unconcious.

She was now free of the annoying voice, and that's all she really cared about right then. Her terrible secret was safe.

Poor Rin. You have to wake up sometime, you know.

February 21st, 2012, 12:52 PM
Reminds me of 'Stranger then Fiction'.

February 21st, 2012, 01:19 PM
This seems more like something that would appropriate for the Fanfics board, to be completely honest.

February 21st, 2012, 09:20 PM

But... :(

February 21st, 2012, 09:22 PM
It'd probably get more attention there, I guess?

I want Fishie to have fun, too! ;_;

February 21st, 2012, 10:25 PM
Oh... Maybe someone can move it there then?

February 21st, 2012, 11:12 PM
Reminds me of that fic someone wrote a while back where the narrator was a yaoi fan.

February 21st, 2012, 11:15 PM
inb4 mike

February 21st, 2012, 11:48 PM
I'm Morgan Freeman.

And I'm about to narrate to you the Life of Shinji.

February 22nd, 2012, 12:17 AM
I'm Morgan Freeman.

And I'm about to narrate to you the Life of Shinji.

Take my money.

February 22nd, 2012, 12:20 AM
Fish makes more in a week than you do in a year, I would suggest hanging on to your money.

February 22nd, 2012, 02:04 AM
Here you go: http://forums.nrvnqsr.com/showthread.php/1720-You-are-a-Narrator?p=628845#post628845