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Spooky
May 22nd, 2011, 12:21 AM
Well, here's what we were talking about. For those who don't know, go here (http://forums.nrvnqsr.com/showthread.php/535-What-if-__________-where-Masters-in-the-Holy-Grail-War?p=104300&viewfull=1#post104300) and read the next few pages.

Only the teaser for now, since I want to put something up tonight. I am still working on the first part of the actual story, though.

However be warned, I foresee smallish updates and longish amounts of time between them. Everything that people hate, in other words! So without further ado...


http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn187/spooky316/BBCcopy.png

*commences blatant near-plagiarism of KnK 6 intro*

90%


I, Kokutou Azaka, am a 16 year old magus apprentice.

I have a brother named Kokutou Mikiya, a master named Aozaki Touko, and a rival in love named Ryougi Shiki.

I'm what you would call a troubled young lady. I'm going to explain myself so there won't be any misunderstandigs. I'm not troubled by the fact that I love my own brother. I seriously love Kokutou Mikiya to the point where I can't believe it myself. I got adopted by my uncle, entered a boarding school called Reien, and lived away from Mikiya so he woudl forget about me being his younger sister.

So there's only one problem I'm facing right now. It's that woman who came barging in and took my prize! I need to get that woman to break up with Mikiya as fast as possible and get him away from dangerous things. I even became an apprentice magus so I could match her mentally and physically and become her rival.

This is a story about such an admirable girl: Me, and my quest to prove once and for all that I'm the only one for Mikiya.

This is the story of the 5th Holy Grail War!


90%

Index

Prologue:
Part 1 (http://forums.nrvnqsr.com/showthread.php/556-Fate-Big-Brother-Complex?p=106256#post106256)
Part 2 (http://forums.nrvnqsr.com/showthread.php/556-Fate-Big-Brother-Complex?p=107027#post107027)
Part 3 (http://forums.nrvnqsr.com/showthread.php/556-Fate-Big-Brother-Complex?p=111153#post111153)
Part 4 (http://forums.nrvnqsr.com/showthread.php/556-Fate-Big-Brother-Complex?p=121165#post121165)
Part 5 (http://forums.nrvnqsr.com/showthread.php/556-Fate-Big-Brother-Complex?p=125238#post125238)
Part 6 (http://forums.nrvnqsr.com/showthread.php/556-Fate-Big-Brother-Complex?p=128872#post128872)
Part 7 (http://forums.nrvnqsr.com/showthread.php/556-Fate-Big-Brother-Complex?p=325276#post325276)
Part 8 (http://forums.nrvnqsr.com/showthread.php/556-Fate-Big-Brother-Complex?p=333264#post333264)

Chapter 1:
Part 1 (http://forums.nrvnqsr.com/showthread.php/556-Fate-Big-Brother-Complex?p=555942#post555942)
Part 2 (http://forums.nrvnqsr.com/showthread.php/556-Fate-Big-Brother-Complex?p=1445061&viewfull=1#post1445061)

FFN Link (http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7383345/1/FateBig_Brother_Complex)

Various Pics:
http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn187/spooky316/BBC2.png
http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn187/spooky316/Archerko/newcostume2-1.jpg

http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn187/spooky316/Archerko/newcostume1.jpg
http://fc08.deviantart.net/fs10/i/2006/076/f/8/The_Lady_of_the_Lake_by_kyrn.jpg

mangafreak7793
May 22nd, 2011, 12:24 AM
What monstrosity have you unleashed on the world!

Big brother run in fear for Taboo GIrl is here!

Anyway nice prologue.

Neir
May 22nd, 2011, 12:26 AM
Oh mother of all fuck. This will be awesome. Or she'll fall to the BAR, like so many before her. Either way, fuck yes.

Spooky
May 22nd, 2011, 12:26 AM
What monstrosity have you unleashed on the world!

Big brother run in fear for Taboo GIrl is here!

Anyway nice prologue.
Prologue, hahahahahahaha. I only wrote like one sentence in that myself, lol.

Alulim
May 22nd, 2011, 12:30 AM
This made my day...night.

mangafreak7793
May 22nd, 2011, 12:44 AM
Oh mother of all fuck. This will be awesome. Or she'll fall to the BAR, like so many before her. Either way, fuck yes.

Screw Mikiya, I have the bone of my sword?

Zeranion
May 22nd, 2011, 12:54 AM
The big question is... Will Archerko try to beat out the other girls, or form them into a harem? The Sword Dancer Doujinshi tend to portray her as Bi, and she was trying to get Saber AND Shirou at the same time. 8D

mangafreak7793
May 22nd, 2011, 12:55 AM
She'll try to bag her master and the enemy master (aka Shirou) and since both of them are sort of taboo Azaka might accept the foursome (if you include saber)

ItsaRandomUsername
May 22nd, 2011, 12:55 AM
>:3

Neir
May 22nd, 2011, 12:56 AM
I like where this is going...

Spooky
May 22nd, 2011, 12:57 AM
(if you include saber)

Lolololol, you don't know of what you speak. :D

mangafreak7793
May 22nd, 2011, 12:59 AM
Is he, since archerko and azaka will disrupt the original story a bunch of new things will happen.

Zeranion
May 22nd, 2011, 01:03 AM
Is he, since archerko and azaka will disrupt the original story a bunch of new things will happen.

Including Lancer's crush on Archerko. This promises to be an... entertaining Grail War >:3

DreamsRequiem
May 22nd, 2011, 01:08 AM
Archerko you say?


http://img135.imageshack.us/img135/1077/012copyw.jpg

Spooky
May 22nd, 2011, 01:09 AM
Damn it, Randy Savage :(

alfheimwanderer
May 22nd, 2011, 01:09 AM
Most of that was shamelessly ripped from the opening of KnK 6, but...it has my interest regardless.

...will Fujinon be making an appearance? :cool:

lethum
May 22nd, 2011, 01:11 AM
I like where this is going...

Fuyuki? Me too.

Spooky
May 22nd, 2011, 01:13 AM
Most of that was shamelessly ripped from the opening of KnK 6, but...it has my interest regardless.

Yep, as I flat out admitted!


...will Fujinon be making an appearance? :cool:

Hmm, probably not, but I haven't really thought about that.

EDIT: Went back and added a title picture. Damn, I forgot how long pic editing takes.

Counterguardian
May 22nd, 2011, 05:47 AM
This is going to be gooooooooooooooooooooooooooood.

Techlet
May 22nd, 2011, 06:13 AM
http://i203.photobucket.com/albums/aa299/spec_operations/Macros/1305176339166.jpg

Spooky
May 22nd, 2011, 01:00 PM
I wonder how many of those there are now... That's three that I've seen myself.

Also, haha I should probably have used the time I spent last night on the pic to actually write the true prologue. :p

Ace
May 22nd, 2011, 01:35 PM
Yeah! BROCONS ASSEMBLE!

Spooky
May 22nd, 2011, 06:32 PM
I'll be posting in snippets, because... it's easier for me to write shorter parts at a time. So here's the first part of the prologue. In true Fate/prologue tradition, we're starting with Rin, to be followed in the story-proper by the jarring change in character povs. ;)

Comments/suggestions/fixes are welcome.


90%

Tohsaka Rin sighed as she prepared her summoning circle.

“Geez, why couldn’t Father have given me something I could use to summon Saber,” she muttered as she worked. It was a pain to use her gems like this, but she was sure that doing it this way would net her the best possible Servant.

The pendant her father left her in his will caught Rin’s eye. She contemplated it for a second before shaking her head. “No, better not use that. It’s absolutely irreplaceable, so I can’t risk anything happening to it. Besides, with everything set up this perfectly I know things will work out!”

Rin checked the time again. “Good thing I remembered to set the clocks,” she said. It was nearing 2:00 AM. “How did I manage to have all of them off by an hour, anyway? Whatever, it doesn’t matter anymore. Everything’s fine now.”

Rin stepped back, took a deep breath, and started to chant.

“Das Material ist aus Silber und Eisen.
Der Grundstein ist aus Stein und dem Großherzog des Vertrag.
Der Ahn ist mein großer Meister Schweinorg.
Schutz gegen einen heftigen Wind.
Schließ alle Tore, geh aus der Krone, zirkulier die Gabelung nach dem König.
Füll, füll, füll, füll, füll.
Es wird fünfmal wiederholt.

Nur ist es die volle Zeit gebrochen.”

Ambient magical energy began to fill Rin’s circuits. Facing the ritual circle, she directed the prana out of her body.

“Satz.
Du überläßt alles mir, mein Schicksal überläßt alles deinem Schwert.
Das basiert auf dem Gral, antwort wenn du diesem Willen und diesem Vernunftgrund folgst.
Liegt das Gelübde hier.
Ich bin die Güte der ganzen Welt.
Ich bin das Böse der ganzen Welt.
Du bist der Himmel mit dreien Wortseelen.
Komm, aus dem Kreis der Unterdrückung, der Schutzgeist der Balkenwaage…!”

The world went white. The last thing Rin saw before her sight was overcome was the circle flashing and starting to glow. A non-existent wind fluttered across her face as the ground in front of her started to rumble gently.

As some form of blurry vision returned… red. That was the first thing that got through to Rin. Her eyes cleared and she gasped as she beheld the glorious image in front of her.


http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn187/spooky316/Saber.jpg

This was it. This… vision… before her could only be one thing. This lovely blonde figure dressed in red, one hand on the pommel of a large red and black sword, could be none other than the very being Rin had been hoping to summon: the Servant Saber!

The Servant raised an eyebrow at Rin’s frank appraisal. "Oh? You have summoned me? I assume that would make you my master, then? Very well, I will show you what a real Servant is capable of! I hope you are worthy of having me as your underling!"


90%

Nero's phrase is partially attributed to Irun (though I changed it up a bit). Thanks for the insight!

ItsaRandomUsername
May 22nd, 2011, 06:37 PM
*Squee*

Alulim
May 22nd, 2011, 06:45 PM
Uwaaaaa~

mangafreak7793
May 22nd, 2011, 07:56 PM
Kyaa

Techlet
May 22nd, 2011, 08:05 PM
HNNNNGH

SeiKeo
May 22nd, 2011, 08:49 PM
Yeeeesssss!!!

DreamsRequiem
May 22nd, 2011, 09:02 PM
OOOH YEAAAAAH!!!!!!!!

Alulim
May 22nd, 2011, 09:09 PM
Meep!

Erlkonig
May 22nd, 2011, 09:11 PM
I AM SOOOOOOO HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGH

lethum
May 22nd, 2011, 09:19 PM
Whooooo!

Spooky
May 22nd, 2011, 09:30 PM
OOOH YEAAAAAH!!!!!!!!

You did it again. :(

ItsaRandomUsername
May 22nd, 2011, 09:36 PM
lancerrapeface,jpg?

DreamsRequiem
May 22nd, 2011, 09:45 PM
You did it again. :(

Randy Savage will always be in our hearts, fellow wrestling fan(?).

But seriously, OHHHHH YEAHHHHH!!!!!!

Spooky
May 22nd, 2011, 10:00 PM
I suppose I can forgive you, then. :cool:

GlanGR
May 22nd, 2011, 11:36 PM
I kind of like how all the posts in the second half of the last page were all slowly getting closer and closer to a legitimate sentence.

Ace
May 22nd, 2011, 11:41 PM
We'll get there eventually.

Spooky
May 23rd, 2011, 02:02 AM
Another short bit before bed.


90%

Rin gaped, but quickly collected herself. “You… you are very presumptuous for a Servant. But answer me this one thing. You are the Saber-class, correct?”

“Of course I am, Master. How could I be anything else? You did notice my sword, did you not?” was the reply.

“Don’t be so foolish, I definitely see your sword. I just wanted to make sure,” Rin said flatly. Inwardly was a different story.

Yes, I did it! Now I’ll win this war for sure! Nothing can stop me! Rin thought. She was so preoccupied with her success that she didn’t notice her mad cackling had leaked into the outside world.

Upon witnessing her master’s short trip into insanity, Saber cocked her head and murmured, “What an… interesting master I’ve been summoned by.”

Immediately snapping back to normal, Rin narrowed her eyes. “What was that? Did you say something I should know about?” she said with a sweet-as-saccharine smile.

http://fsn.seorinwastaken.com/rinC03c.png

“No, nothing, Master. You must have been hearing things,” Saber replied with her own smile. “Now, I’m receiving an excellent amount of prana from you, so that’s one good thing we have already, but we should now discuss our plans for the Holy Grail War.”

Rin nodded in agreement. “Yes, that sounds like a good idea, but it’s getting late. We can do most of that tomorrow, right?”

Sighing in disappointment, Saber responded, “I suppose, Master. I guess since you’re only human you still need your rest.”

Something about the way she said that makes me angry… Rin thought. “One thing first, though,” she said aloud. “Which heroic spirit are you?”

Saber puffed up with arrogance. “Ah, Master. How good of you to ask. You have been lucky enough to summon the Fifth Roman Emperor, Nero Claudius Caesar Augustus Germanicus,” she haughtily announced.

There was a short pause as Rin assimilated the information.

“...Eh? Aren’t you supposed to be a guy?”

Alulim
May 23rd, 2011, 02:05 AM
Yay~

ItsaRandomUsername
May 23rd, 2011, 02:07 AM
RIN KNOWS SOMETHING'S NOT RIGHT.

Ace
May 23rd, 2011, 02:10 AM
The ending made me LOL, continue this Epic Bro-Con Story!

TimeDiver
May 23rd, 2011, 02:19 AM
...waitaminute.

I didn't read the original story idea post(s), and am a bit short on time, so...

If Rin got Saber (Nero), and Azaka/Akiha get Archer(-ko), Shirou gets: Caster? Rider? Saver?!

ItsaRandomUsername
May 23rd, 2011, 02:21 AM
Avenger.





....dunnolol.

Ace
May 23rd, 2011, 02:22 AM
Shirou gets Lancer because Bazette decided not to come.

ItsaRandomUsername
May 23rd, 2011, 02:24 AM
That'd be awesome. And it would make Archerko's attempts to get close to him and seduce him incredibly hilarious, since Lancer wears his rapeface around her 24/7 according to the latest Sword Dancers doujin.

Neir
May 23rd, 2011, 03:00 AM
Shirou gets EMIYA. Double the onii-chans.

Grant
May 23rd, 2011, 03:02 AM
I forget if it's possible for Arturia, but she did have a fairly high skill in riding. If that can't work his only other option would be EMIYA.

Techlet
May 23rd, 2011, 03:10 AM
That'd be awesome. And it would make Archerko's attempts to get close to him and seduce him incredibly hilarious, since Lancer wears his rapeface around her 24/7 according to the latest Sword Dancers doujin.

BUSTER ORION!

SECOND SIN OF THE VIRGIN GODDESS!

DreamsRequiem
May 23rd, 2011, 03:28 AM
My avi is pleased.

ringlhach
May 23rd, 2011, 06:59 AM
I wonder if Gil would bite off on Saber!Nero if Saber!Arturia isn't around? They look fairly similar, after all... And, of course, you can't forget the upcoming yuri molestation SKINSHIP between Rin and her Saber...

Keyne
May 23rd, 2011, 07:03 AM
He found her interesting because she opposed him. I dunno about Nero...

ringlhach
May 23rd, 2011, 07:23 AM
Yeah, but that was Fourth War. We're into the Fifth now- meaning that he has (in theory) met, and been opposed by, Arturia once already. That's why the question of appearances- would he chase after Nero, thinking she's Arturia? Apparently I'm just that damn obscure sometimes. I'd thought it was pretty straightforward...

Keyne
May 23rd, 2011, 07:25 AM
Gilgamesh: "ARGH! My perfect waifu is wearing such naughty, revealing clothes! My heart can't stop racing! Come and dive into my manly chest!"

DreamsRequiem
May 23rd, 2011, 07:36 AM
....that sounds strangely familiar. Like from a doujin I've read before but can't remember.

Something about Saber swapping bodies...

Keyne
May 23rd, 2011, 07:40 AM
Yeah! Ryougi Shiki was in Saber's body back then. :D

SeiKeo
May 23rd, 2011, 09:34 AM
Yeah! Ryougi Shiki was in Saber's body back then. :D

wut

Keyne
May 23rd, 2011, 09:52 AM
wut
Soul swap made by Magical Amber. You have no idea. :3

TimeDiver
May 23rd, 2011, 09:53 AM
Dammit, Kohaku!

...Battle Moon Wars, hidden extra/final stage, with all of the Mecha-Hisui?*

Never got around to actually playing that far...

Keyne
May 23rd, 2011, 09:55 AM
Dammit, Kohaku!
Not Kohaku, Magical Amber. :D THERE ARE TWO OF THEM! :D

SeiKeo
May 23rd, 2011, 09:56 AM
Soul swap made by Magical Amber. You have no idea. :3

Okay, what doujin was that from?

Keyne
May 23rd, 2011, 10:01 AM
Okay, what doujin was that from?
One of them All Around Type Moon stuff. Those doujins in the cafe. I can't remember the title.

Spooky
May 23rd, 2011, 10:30 AM
...waitaminute.

I didn't read the original story idea post(s), and am a bit short on time, so...

If Rin got Saber (Nero), and Azaka/Akiha get Archer(-ko), Shirou gets: Caster? Rider? Saver?!

Lol. :cool:

GlanGR
May 23rd, 2011, 04:33 PM
In a shocking plot twist, Shirou won't even be in the war.

ringlhach
May 23rd, 2011, 05:47 PM
In a shocking plot twist, Shirou won't even be in the war.

Nah, he gets to be the Grail instead. :p Shinji x Shirou's heart, anyone?

lethum
May 23rd, 2011, 06:08 PM
Shirou=Grail.
Justica=Grail.
Eva!Become one with you=sex___
Shirou and Justica have sex while the Bro-cons do the Holy Grail War thing?

Ace
May 23rd, 2011, 06:23 PM
But without Shirou who will Archerko go for?

Techlet
May 23rd, 2011, 06:32 PM
Nah, he gets to be the Grail instead. :p Shinji x Shirou's heart, anyone?

Two imoutos One Grail?

Spooky
May 23rd, 2011, 06:36 PM
In a shocking plot twist, Shirou won't even be in the war.

Shit, how did you know?! Now I have to scrap the whole story!

Grant
May 23rd, 2011, 07:41 PM
Well, why not? Not every war needs to include Emiya Shirou.

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 12:21 AM
Brainstorm with me, BL. What would be the best way to avoid Saber defeating Lancer quickly in the school scene? Just have Shirou interrupt earlier, causing Lancer to run off to kill him before really getting into it with Saber? Something else? Suggestions would be helpful.

Alulim
May 24th, 2011, 12:23 AM
I think that one is fine, but Shirou goes bye-bye...

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 12:24 AM
He'd still get saved by Rin...

Alulim
May 24th, 2011, 12:25 AM
Shirou interrupting would be in his character. I say go for it.

lethum
May 24th, 2011, 12:28 AM
EMIYA INTERRUPT! And then get chased by a man in a skintight blue suit and his Gay Bulge.

mangafreak7793
May 24th, 2011, 12:29 AM
Agreed, but will Azaka and Archerko will be effected by his BAR?

Alulim
May 24th, 2011, 12:29 AM
Did someone say Gay Bulge?
http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b372/Cade300/3249802.jpg

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 12:34 AM
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-

Alulim!!!!!! http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn187/spooky316/Smileys/emot-argh.gif

Anyway, new thought that just came to me. Like I originally suggested on the other thread, let's say that Medea wasn't summoned at all. So what if Shirou's botched summoning doesn't summon Saver Arturia, but the Lady of the Lake as Caster? She's demi-human, so it should be technically possible, and I could have her Faerie heritage give her a boost so she'd be at a similar level to Medea. Thoughts? Good? Bad? Anyone? Bueller?

Alulim
May 24th, 2011, 12:34 AM
I like! Do it~

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 12:35 AM
Avalon was originally created by her, after all.

EDIT: This seems to have expanded greatly from the original Team Onii-con in ways that I didn't even see coming.

mangafreak7793
May 24th, 2011, 12:35 AM
sure?

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 12:38 AM
^ Go go enthusiasm?

EDIT: If I do go this way, I'm going to have the Lady's true name be Charis. Extra special cookie to anyone who gets this reference, since I don't think it's all that well known.

mangafreak7793
May 24th, 2011, 12:41 AM
Infinite Stratos?

Alulim
May 24th, 2011, 12:41 AM
Sadly, I don't get the cookie.

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 12:42 AM
Nope. It was the name of the Lady of the Lake from my source, though, if that helps.

Further hint, in the source she was Merlin's mom.

Alulim
May 24th, 2011, 12:43 AM
Still no cookie.

mangafreak7793
May 24th, 2011, 12:45 AM
gives up...

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 12:45 AM
I'm really curious if anyone knows this book series (another clue!), since I really like this version of the Arthurian legend. It's low fantasy though, hardly any magic. In this series Merlin was a druid and bard.

Alulim
May 24th, 2011, 12:46 AM
Sadly, I do not recognize it.

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 12:50 AM
All right. Contest over, since I want to share it with everyone.

It's the Pendragon Cycle (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pendragon_Cycle) by Stephen R. Lawhead. It does preach Christianity quite a bit, but I still really enjoy the books. It also features the whole of the Welsh Mabinogion told throughout the series, in the form of stories told by bards. I've read the Mabinogi both here and by itself, and I prefer the language Lawhead uses to tell the tales.

<-- is of Welsh descent

Alulim
May 24th, 2011, 12:51 AM
Sounds interesting, I may look for those next time I head for the library.

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 01:40 AM
Ok, so the prologue will continue up through Shirou's summoning of Caster, aka the game's opening scene retooled. Then I'll move into the first scene I briefly outlined in the ideas thread.

In other words, no Arturia in this story...

Unless, of course, I have her be the one tainted by the grail at the end of the Fourth War (that would mean no Gil then). Could make for some interesting scenes with corrupted Arturia/Excalibur and the Lady.

ItsaRandomUsername
May 24th, 2011, 01:41 AM
Eh, who needs her when we have MOTHERF*CKING EMPEROR NERO?!

Nero~


EDIT: Lady of the Lake, will she be PURTY?

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 01:42 AM
Did you read carefully? :3

EDIT:
Lady of the Lake, will she be PURTY?
I'm actually in the process of looking for art that shows how I imagine her.

ItsaRandomUsername
May 24th, 2011, 01:43 AM
That's not Arturia, that's [REDACTED]

[REDACTED] is more than okay, too.

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 01:49 AM
http://fc08.deviantart.net/fs10/i/2006/076/f/8/The_Lady_of_the_Lake_by_kyrn.jpg

This right here is seriously close to what I was thinking for Charis.

Alulim
May 24th, 2011, 01:53 AM
Silver/blue hair is win.

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 01:58 AM
Yes, the white hair was the only thing I was sure about when I went pic-searching.

Alulim
May 24th, 2011, 01:59 AM
I seem to have a fetish for that.

ItsaRandomUsername
May 24th, 2011, 02:22 AM
Same here.

Neir
May 24th, 2011, 02:44 AM
Fucking Vivian, how does SHE work?

Keyne
May 24th, 2011, 03:08 AM
Fucking Vivian, how does SHE work?
I honestly have no idea.

VelspertheCat
May 24th, 2011, 04:59 AM
Fucking Vivian, how does SHE work?

I'd like to answer that, but I'm still trying to work out how magnets work first.

Keyne
May 24th, 2011, 05:04 AM
Excalibur and Avalon are a set. There is no way Shirou would summon anyone else than Arturia with Avalon as the catalyst for the summoning.

ringlhach
May 24th, 2011, 05:48 AM
So Excalibur was given back to the Lady of the Lake. Arturia's little LOLtimefuck deal with the World doesn't mean that it didn't happen, just that she got a lot of subjective time out. The problem I see is that its legend is associated with Arturia, and the Lady of the Lake is only mentioned in passing. Now, if they had something from Vivian's/Nimue's crystal cave, that could summon either her or Merlin. Ah, timefucks. Nothing quite like 'em.

Keyne
May 24th, 2011, 05:57 AM
But then Shirou dies from suffocation. Of course he had burns around his body, but the worse problem was all the smoke he inhaled. Could have carbon monoxide in it. Deadly stuff. 20 minutes of inhaling and you're dead.

Ergast
May 24th, 2011, 07:20 AM
EMIYA INTERRUPT!

Why, after reading this, I pictured Shirou launching a BP or a sword rain against Lancer?

Keyne
May 24th, 2011, 07:29 AM
Why, after reading this, I pictured Shirou launching a BP or a sword rain against Lancer?
Cuz u'r a fanboi liek dat.

Ergast
May 24th, 2011, 08:42 AM
No, I just was picturing an interrupt EMIYA style instead of the PARAGON or RENEGADE styles.

And since it was Shirou the one doing the interrupt, it has to be him launching a BP or a sword rain XDDD

Keyne
May 24th, 2011, 08:43 AM
No, it doesn't. He can also chop you with Caliburn.

Ergast
May 24th, 2011, 08:56 AM
The key word here is EMIYA, as in all in caps.

Keyne
May 24th, 2011, 08:59 AM
I...er...hm..... SHUT UP! >:U

ringlhach
May 24th, 2011, 08:59 AM
So... exploding BP arrow from four miles off? Sword-rains are fun and all, but they're really Gil's thing. Unless he's pulling CG duty and killing everything, but killbot mode isn't necessarily EMIYA.

Ergast
May 24th, 2011, 09:08 AM
Now that's what I call an interrupt XD

lethum
May 24th, 2011, 10:10 AM
http://fc08.deviantart.net/fs10/i/2006/076/f/8/The_Lady_of_the_Lake_by_kyrn.jpg
Charis: This sword? I made it, yo. You want one?

EnigmaticFellow
May 24th, 2011, 10:26 AM
Charis: This sword? I made it, yo. You want one?

Shirou: I sure wouldn't mind having that sword

Traced sword appears on Shirou hand.

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 12:01 PM
Excalibur and Avalon are a set. There is no way Shirou would summon anyone else than Arturia with Avalon as the catalyst for the summoning.

One of the directions I could go with this story would mean that Arturia's already around, though...

Keyne
May 24th, 2011, 12:04 PM
One of the directions I could go with this story would mean that Arturia's already around, though...
That's impossible.

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 12:08 PM
Oh? Why do you say that?

lethum
May 24th, 2011, 12:09 PM
Maybe, instead of going back in time, Arturia entered Avalon The Sheath? So she can't be summoned because she''s already here, and the Grail summons the next best thing: The caster who (may have?) gave Excalibur to Saber.

Keyne
May 24th, 2011, 12:11 PM
And how is that possible?

Maybe, instead of going back in time, Arturia entered Avalon The Sheath? So she can't be summoned because she''s already here, and the Grail summons the next best thing: The caster who (may have?) gave Excalibur to Saber.
And the Grail realises that Saber's been already summoned, so Rin gets no Nero. Also, the sheath has no soul-storing abilities, and Arturia's soul immediately returns to her body when the war is over.

ringlhach
May 24th, 2011, 12:57 PM
Alt option: Saber didn't get un-summoned after the Fourth. It'd take lots of ranks on a skill I don't remember her having, though (Independent Action). Gil got ranks up due to grail mud; not sure what it'd do to her. Differentl skill ranks for Alter, maybe? Dunno; I never really paid much attention to what grail gunk did.
That'd give her a line to AM, though, wouldn't it?

EnigmaticFellow
May 24th, 2011, 01:01 PM
I prefer the idea of Arturia being in Avalon. It's the least complicated out of all the suggestions so far.

Keyne
May 24th, 2011, 01:05 PM
Alt option: Saber didn't get un-summoned after the Fourth. It'd take lots of ranks on a skill I don't remember her having, though (Independent Action). Gil got ranks up due to grail mud; not sure what it'd do to her. Differentl skill ranks for Alter, maybe? Dunno; I never really paid much attention to what grail gunk did.
That'd give her a line to AM, though, wouldn't it?
You want her to go mad, don't you? Plus, she can't have Independent Action. She's not an Archer.

I prefer the idea of Arturia being in Avalon. It's the least complicated out of all the suggestions so far.
That's still silly.

EnigmaticFellow
May 24th, 2011, 01:07 PM
That's still silly.

I'm talking about the utopia, Avalon, not the sheath.

Keyne
May 24th, 2011, 01:08 PM
I'm talking about the utopia, Avalon, not the sheath.
But that still doesn't make sense. She still hasn't given up on the contract. And after Fate/Zero she's even more determined to get the Grail.

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 01:10 PM
Alt option: Saber didn't get un-summoned after the Fourth. It'd take lots of ranks on a skill I don't remember her having, though (Independent Action). Gil got ranks up due to grail mud; not sure what it'd do to her. Differentl skill ranks for Alter, maybe? Dunno; I never really paid much attention to what grail gunk did.
That'd give her a line to AM, though, wouldn't it?

My original idea was futzing something with the mud for her instead of Gil, I'm just not entirely sure where to go after that.

ringlhach
May 24th, 2011, 01:33 PM
You want her to go mad, don't you? Plus, she can't have Independent Action. She's not an Archer. That depends entirely on how she goes crazy. Also, black text. I'm pretty sure she'd just be a variant of Alter, although Neir will try to crucify me for saying "just." Even if I can't seem to spell "different" correctly. ARGH MAH FINGARS DON' WANNA WURK

@Spooky: Keyne's pointed out the rule on that. although if you want to fudge it, go ahead. Just be prepared to be called on it.

Keyne
May 24th, 2011, 01:37 PM
That depends entirely on how she goes crazy. Also, black text. I'm pretty sure she'd just be a variant of Alter, although Neir will try to crucify me for saying "just." Even if I can't seem to spell "different" correctly. ARGH MAH FINGARS DON' WANNA WURK

@Spooky: Keyne's pointed out the rule on that. although if you want to fudge it, go ahead. Just be prepared to be called on it.
Actually, that's pretty much correct. She'll turn into Alter, but without a Master, she will vanish and the cycle starts anew.

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 01:38 PM
Yeah, no matter how things turn out something will probably end up skirting/bending/lightly breaking the rules. :(

But luckily there are still more scenes with Rin & Nero before I have to think about it!

EDIT: Would Alter stumbling upon Kirei and making a contract with him immediately to avoid disappearing be reasonable, or too much of an ass-pull?

Keyne
May 24th, 2011, 01:40 PM
EDIT: Would Alter stumbling upon Kirei and making a contract with him immediately to avoid disappearing be reasonable, or too much of an ass-pull?
Ass-pull. Why would she want to make a contract with the enemy?

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 01:41 PM
Basically to avoid fading away, like I said. But I suppose I'll have to think of something else, then.

Keyne
May 24th, 2011, 01:43 PM
She'd feel no connection to this world now that the Grail is gone. She'd see no reason to linger around. She's not Gil, who sees benefits in this.

ringlhach
May 24th, 2011, 01:48 PM
Hm. Would the World prevent her from rubberbanding back to her body if she's corrupted, would it restore her to its "image" of her, or would it care? Gaia? Alaya? Fuck if I remember which it is. Damn, this is annoying. D:<

Just as a possible edge-skirting suggestion. Personally, I don't know that it'd care, but it might mean that the next time she was summoned, she was Alter instead of herself...

Keyne
May 24th, 2011, 01:50 PM
Hm. Would the World prevent her from rubberbanding back to her body if she's corrupted, would it restore her to its "image" of her, or would it care? Gaia? Alaya? Fuck if I remember which it is. Damn, this is annoying. D:<
This is up to debate actually. My opinion is that she's stranded between the world from whence she came and her body, because her body can't recognise its soul even though it's familiar. But I think the general opinion would be that she returns to her body just fine.

Just as a possible edge-skirting suggestion. Personally, I don't know that it'd care, but it might mean that the next time she was summoned, she was Alter instead of herself...
But then she'd still have to return to her body and be re-summoned.

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 01:59 PM
Hm. Would the World prevent her from rubberbanding back to her body if she's corrupted, would it restore her to its "image" of her, or would it care?


This is up to debate actually. My opinion is that she's stranded between the world from whence she came and her body, because her body can't recognise its soul even though it's familiar.

Hmm, I could use something like this, but I'd still have to explain the prana issues, and the lack of a master.

ringlhach
May 24th, 2011, 01:59 PM
This is up to debate actually. My opinion is that she's stranded between the world from whence she came and her body, because her body can't recognise its soul even though it's familiar. But I think the general opinion would be that she returns to her body just fine.

But then she'd still have to return to her body and be re-summoned.

Yeah, the last bit's my personal opinion- there's things that leave a mark on a soul, after all, and grail mud -MUD, not mund, dammit fingers!- but if it prevented her from going back/discorporating at all, that'd be the workaround.

EDIT 'cos it wasn't there:

Hmm, I could use something like this, but I'd still have to explain the prana issues, and the lack of a master.
She's got a contract w/ All the World's Evil now. That's got a certain amount of power on its own. Kiritsugu didn't die right away even in the original time line; that might help, since I don't see him just letting her wander off on her own. After he dies, though, that'd be up to you.

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 02:09 PM
I just don't want Shirou to know of Arturia until the 5th War, and I'm not sure how to involve Kiritsugu without including Shirou. Maybe he saw her go down to the mud and thought she died?

Alulim
May 24th, 2011, 02:13 PM
Possible.

ringlhach
May 24th, 2011, 02:14 PM
Well, that might work; he thought it ate Kotomine, after all. But if the "bond" was still present, he should be able to tell. Bah, stupid customs laws and not being able to d/l stuff here. I want to be able to go check on this stuff now, just to make sure. D:

Any specific reasons? He could be "one of his father's friends," a lot like Raiga, except she doesn't show up that often. Almost never, really.

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 02:18 PM
Kiritsugu used up all his seals though, so would he still even feel anything?

On the other hand, now that I think about it I kind of like the idea that Shirou only vaguely knows her in that she used to know his father, and then is hugely surprised when he actually does find out who she is.

Alulim
May 24th, 2011, 02:21 PM
I like!

Neir
May 24th, 2011, 02:57 PM
I support Alter being involved.

Keyne
May 24th, 2011, 03:09 PM
On the other hand, now that I think about it I kind of like the idea that Shirou only vaguely knows her in that she used to know his father, and then is hugely surprised when he actually does find out who she is.
Thing is, how Shirou will know anything about her? Prior to the War he only had vague dreams of Excalibur.

Shirou is destined to summoned Saber. Many factors made it the only outcome, Kiritsugu implanting Avalon into him being the most important.

Alulim
May 24th, 2011, 04:08 PM
Fanfiction can make anything happen. Rewriting the laws of 'reality' should be nothing.

Spooky
May 24th, 2011, 04:10 PM
That's true, though I'd rather not drive away potential readers...

Alulim
May 24th, 2011, 04:13 PM
Hmph, they are being sticklers for the rules. Live a little.

Keyne
May 24th, 2011, 04:16 PM
Alulim, for some reason, I'm a bit irritated by that post.

Ergast
May 24th, 2011, 04:17 PM
You want her to go mad, don't you? Plus, she can't have Independent Action. She's not an Archer.

Rider begs to differ. She isn't an Archer but she still has Independant Action (Rank C IIRC)

Alulim
May 24th, 2011, 04:18 PM
Alulim, for some reason, I'm a bit irritated by that post.

Hm, really? I apologize then. I was mostly joking...

Spooky
May 25th, 2011, 01:38 AM
And now for something completely different. An update!

Let me know what you think of Saber's...reaction...here. You'll know what I mean.


90%

It was late the next morning when Rin woke up. With a passive gaze, she glanced at the clock. “…Like I thought. It’s too late to go to school. What did I do last night to make me sleep in like this…?”

It should be noted that Rin was not a morning person, so she can be forgiven for momentarily forgetting the momentous occasion she’d had last night.

Her face scrunched up as she tried to remember. She lit up like a light bulb as it came to her. “That’s right! I succeeded in summoning Saber!”

Rin rose from the bed sluggishly. “It seems I’m out of prana. It’s a good thing I have today for recovery.” As she made her way through her morning routine, Rin abruptly recalled Saber’s reaction to Rin’s questioning of her gender the previous night.

. . .

“...Eh? Aren’t you supposed to be a guy?” Rin blurted.

A sickly smile formed on Saber’s face. Her eyes darkened to points and she seemed to suddenly grow to a preposterous height, enough to tower over Rin. And if Rin wasn’t mistaken, was that hellfire in the background?

“Are you saying this body is anything but the pinnacle of femininity?” Saber asked, the smile never leaving her face. She cupped her modest breasts. “And what of these? You can’t say you didn’t notice them,” she pointed out, referring to how she’d caught Rin staring at her earlier. “And do you think I wear this skirt for no reason?” Saber indicated the sheer article of clothing. “I am a woman, and do not forget it!”

Saber huffed and turned her head, crossing her arms beneath aforementioned breasts, which only served to emphasize them more.

Rin looked away as well, her cheeks flushing slightly. “Alright already, I get it. You’re a proud member of the better half. And there’s absolutely no way I’ll forget it, especially now," she finished in a mumble, heading up to bed.

The last thing Rin saw before she turned to the stairs was a small pleased smile flash across Saber’s face.

. . .

Rin shuddered in remembrance. “Right. Don’t doubt Saber’s gender again. No problems there. So Emperor Nero’s a girl. That’s a surprise, but it’s fine,” she mused as she headed downstairs.

“That’s a good thing, Master,” Saber announced teasingly as she materialized without warning next to Rin. “I’m glad you can appreciate a good woman when you see one.”

“!!!!!!” Rin gasped in surprise. “Just what do you think you’re doing?! You could have given me a heart attack! And don’t say things like that, either!” she said with a glare. “You’re my Servant, you should be respectful!”

“Don’t worry Master. I know when to be serious,” Saber said. “I wouldn’t have been a very good emperor if I didn’t. But I also know when to relax. I wouldn’t have lived long enough to be a good emperor if I didn’t.”

“Just don’t make a habit of it,” Rin instructed, passing Saber by. She walked into the kitchen and put on a pot of tea.

“Anyway Saber,” Rin said, “As soon as I finish breakfast we’ll take a walk around the town, so you can get used to where everything is.”

“A decent idea, Master. It would be good to know the lay of the land if I am to fight here,” Saber agreed.

Alulim
May 25th, 2011, 01:46 AM
Hooray~

Keyne
May 25th, 2011, 03:00 AM
Rider begs to differ. She isn't an Archer but she still has Independant Action (Rank C IIRC)
Saber DOESN'T have Independent Action AT ALL, Ergast-kun.

Also...

NICE BOASTING THERE, NERO! :D A pity that you were a bit too carefree in your life to be that "good emperor" you speak of.

ItsaRandomUsername
May 25th, 2011, 03:02 AM
Fun Fact: Nero's chest size is noticeably larger than Canon!Saber's.

/food for thought

Keyne
May 25th, 2011, 03:09 AM
Fun Fact: Nero's chest size is noticeably larger than Canon!Saber's.

/food for thought
We know that.

ItsaRandomUsername
May 25th, 2011, 03:12 AM
DON'T QUEESTION MAH AUTHORITAY!

*pimpslap*

>:3

[/notsrs]


inb4 minor derail :p

Alulim
May 25th, 2011, 03:14 AM
Hmm, derail is needed? The men from the planet Ludatzgh are attacking...!

Erlkonig
May 25th, 2011, 06:15 AM
Kukuku... Fuck yes, a bi Rin and a bi Nero!

ringlhach
May 25th, 2011, 07:32 AM
Things are going to be interesting~. I need to go back and read the OPs again- I don't remember how Rin ended up with Nero any more. -_- Still, I'm looking forward to many attempted seductions. Stupid sexy Saber. Stupid sexy Rin. ^_^
Would mention Sakura, but only Erlkonig, Mike and Altima care about her she hasn't shown up yet.
EDIT: IRUn's fault. Go figure. :p

Neir
May 25th, 2011, 09:59 AM
Acknowledging someone as being attractive doesn't make you bi.

amado
May 25th, 2011, 10:05 AM
hmm...
well if shirou wont get to do much in this one, can you at least keep archer in this one? if still possible I mean. just to see how he reacts to the major changes and archerko.

Keyne
May 25th, 2011, 10:08 AM
Rin has Nero, who is a Saber. There will be no EMIYA.

EnigmaticFellow
May 25th, 2011, 10:09 AM
Acknowledging someone as being attractive doesn't make you bi.

However, Rin's description of Arturia in the prologue says otherwise, and there's also the first prana transfer scene with Saber and Shirou.

Neir
May 25th, 2011, 10:10 AM
I mean Nero. There's no question that Rin is bi.

amado
May 25th, 2011, 10:13 AM
well how about shirou summoning him but before he gets killed he's turned into the grail(or whatever you guys were talking about in the previous pages).
eh il still read anyway. just that id like it with archer for GAR and snarky remarks.

Keyne
May 25th, 2011, 10:18 AM
Well, Shirou won't summon him. He has a specific catalyst in him which takes priority.

Spooky
May 25th, 2011, 11:55 AM
Yeah, sorry, there'll be no Archer in this one.

Alulim
May 25th, 2011, 12:47 PM
Ah, okay.

Ergast
May 25th, 2011, 03:30 PM
Saber DOESN'T have Independent Action AT ALL, Ergast-kun..

I'm not saying she has, Keyne-kun. I'm just saying that you don't need to be an Archer to have Independant Action.

Grant
May 25th, 2011, 03:43 PM
Well, Shirou won't summon him. He has a specific catalyst in him which takes priority.

Assuming Shirou does summon a Servant, if all the classes have been filled he wouldn't be able to summon Arturia. Of course Spooky's stated that EMIYA isn't showing up so it's a moot point.

Keyne
May 25th, 2011, 03:47 PM
Then, logically, Shirou's out of the war.

Alulim
May 25th, 2011, 04:37 PM
...why? Does that mean if EMIYA is out then so is Shirou?

Keyne
May 25th, 2011, 04:38 PM
Shirou has no-one to summon. He'll be just killed by Lancer.

Alulim
May 25th, 2011, 04:40 PM
Oh, I see. I misunderstood then.

But if Neco-Arc comes out of the floor...

lethum
May 25th, 2011, 04:50 PM
Don't be silly. Shirou won't die, he'll make a pact with a world to survive and become a hero of justice, and become a Heroic Spirit at the end of his life, like I think nasu!Joan D'Arc did.

Keyne
May 25th, 2011, 04:56 PM
His life would be as long as a breath, because Saber saved him in the very last moment.

lethum
May 25th, 2011, 05:03 PM
Saber saved him at the last moment...in F/SN. Events could diverge enough for Shirou to get enough time/survive.

Grant
May 25th, 2011, 05:04 PM
That is entirely possible. Different Servants, different Masters different possible outcomes.

Alulim
May 25th, 2011, 05:05 PM
A different Lancer would screw everything up. He/she might just blow Shirou up at the school, leaving nothing left to be revived. Ehehehehehe~

Spooky
May 25th, 2011, 05:07 PM
Lol at all the speculation. In the meantime, here's a new pic:

http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn187/spooky316/BBC2.png

You know, I'll actually be sad when I finish the prologue, since I won't get to right as much Rin & Nero anymore.

Keyne
May 25th, 2011, 05:09 PM
BBC...

pfffaaahahahahaa

Spooky
May 25th, 2011, 05:12 PM
In another thread I did make a comment that the abbreviation could also go with my Doctor Who crossover. ;)

mangafreak7793
May 25th, 2011, 05:18 PM
British Broadcasting Channel?

Alulim
May 25th, 2011, 05:20 PM
Breasts, Butts, and Cleavage? (I dunno...)

Spooky
May 30th, 2011, 03:12 PM
Question: Is anyone good at adding shading/shadows/touch-ups or whatever you call it to pics? I've colored a couple recently, but I'm no good at adding the accents like that. So... anyone willing to help?

And yes, I know I should get back to writing. http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn187/spooky316/Smileys/emot-gonk.gif

Keyne
May 30th, 2011, 03:21 PM
http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn187/spooky316/Smileys/emot-gonk.gif

I'm only good with pixels.

lethum
May 30th, 2011, 03:23 PM
I do my best shopsjobs with mspaint.

Keyne
May 30th, 2011, 03:24 PM
I do my best shopsjobs with mspaint.
Welcome to the club, br0. :D

Spooky
May 30th, 2011, 03:58 PM
On to try in a different thread then!

Alulim
May 30th, 2011, 04:00 PM
Eh?

Spooky
May 30th, 2011, 04:03 PM
I posted the pics in the Archerko thread, so if you want to view them as they are now, see here. (http://forums.nrvnqsr.com/showthread.php/487-Sword-Dancers?p=120150&viewfull=1#post120150)

Alulim
May 30th, 2011, 04:04 PM
Yup!

SeiKeo
May 30th, 2011, 04:04 PM
Dude, those are really good even without shading, the second especially.

Spooky
May 30th, 2011, 04:07 PM
Minor spoiler, that's the outfit I'm going to be using for her in this fic.

Alulim
May 30th, 2011, 04:18 PM
Very nice~

EnigmaticFellow
May 30th, 2011, 09:59 PM
Minor spoiler, that's the outfit I'm going to be using for her in this fic.

The story, you ruined it. You monster! not serious

Spooky
May 30th, 2011, 10:09 PM
Ah, I see. It appears I must now offer atonement. Goodb-http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn187/spooky316/Smileys/emot-suicide.gif

Spooky
May 31st, 2011, 02:07 AM
Doubleposting because I feel like it, and for new content.


90%

The duo spent the morning wandering Miyama. Rin pointed out the way to various important places such as Ryudou Temple and the school, while Saber trailed behind in astral form. It was almost noon when they reached the bridge separating Miyama from Fuyuki’s other district, Shinto.

“Incidentally, Master,” Rin heard Saber’s voice in her head, “I still haven’t been graced with the name of my choreographer.”

Rin paused in the middle of the bridge and gazed out across the water. “Chore… oh, I see. Yes, I forgot to introduce myself; how thoughtless,” she muttered in embarrassment. “Rin. Tohsaka Rin is my name.”

There was no one nearby at the moment, giving Saber the opportunity to fade into view next to Rin. Nodding, she replied, “It’s good to finally learn the name of the person who will be directing me in this play we have been cast in.”

“Play? This isn’t some show we’re putting on. Don’t tell me you’re not taking this seriously, Saber,” Rin accused.

Saber turned to her. “On the contrary, Master. It can indeed be a work of art, and fortunately for you you’ve summoned one of the premier artists of my and any other time. I guarantee that by the time the curtain draws to a close on this Grail War we will be the ones left standing to take a bow,” the servant said, emphasizing with a hand flourish.

Shaking her head, Rin sighed. “When you say things like that I just don’t understand you, Saber.”

“Huh, I don’t see what’s hard to understand at all. I’m the Servant Saber, you are my master; as the greatest team, we will naturally claim victory, and as a result the world will be able to enjoy my art once more,” Saber stated confidently.

“Enjoy your… That’s what you want? You’re going to waste an all-powerful wish on something as insignificant as art?!” Rin exclaimed in disbelief.

“…” Saber’s eye twitched as she glared at Rin. “Master, since you have never bore witness to my art I will forgive you this once. I am a gracious person, after all, and you will change your tune. However please don’t repeat the insult.”

Rin shivered at the look she was receiving. “Fine, have it your way,” she responded moodily. Whatever, if she wants to waste her wish that’s fine with me. At least she’s serious about winning, though. No doubt about that.

The young magus resumed her walk along the bridge, Saber fading back into spirit form and following. They continued along and off the bridge, into the modern half of Fuyuki. As they passed one road, Rin commented, “The church is down that way. My so-called ‘guardian’ is the priest there. Heh, more like false priest.” She said the last bit under her breath. “He’s also the supervisor for the Grail War this time. I suppose I’ll have to tell him I’ve summoned a servant soon.”

“Hmm? You don’t seem to like him much,” Saber inferred from Rin’s tone of voice.

“He rubs me the wrong way, that’s for sure,” Rin confirmed. “But I shouldn’t complain too much. He leaves me alone for the most part.”

Their journey came to a close when the pair reached the park in the middle of the district. Saber reappeared and hesitated upon entering.

“Oh? You noticed?” Rin remarked.

“…? Master, there seems to be a foul aura surrounding this place,” was the response. Saber’s eyes flickered back and forth, scanning the area.

“Yes, this park was the location of the final battle in the previous Holy Grail War. I don’t know exactly what happened, but the result is what you see here.”

“It is a dead place, Master. We shouldn’t stay here any longer than necessary,” said the knight of the sword.

“I’ll agree with you there. I just wanted you to see it. Let’s try not to create something similar this time.” A sharp pain on her arm caused Rin to wince. “My command seals… we’re being watched.”

The red/black flame-like longsword she’d been summoned with appeared in Saber’s hand. “I don’t sense anything, but I’ll trust you.”

Rin concentrated, scanning the area. “…Nothing. It must be a master, then. A powerful one as well, or else they wouldn’t be able to hide from me this well. Alright, if that’s the way they want it, I can play too. If they want to watch, let them.”

The rest of the day was spent showing their observer a merry time, aimlessly wandering around Shinto, doing such mundane things as going into stores and having a bite to eat. Well, at least Rin did. Saber didn’t see the need to eat anything. Once she was through with dinner, Rin led Saber to their ultimate destination: the tallest building in Fuyuki.

“Well here we are,” Rin said while sweeping back her wind-swept hair. “We’ve been to the important parts, but from here you can get a good overview of the whole city.”

“Yes, but I could get more use out of it if I was an Archer-class,” Saber said dismissively.

“What? No, that’s not why I brought you here. It’s just… isn’t it a nice view?” Rin asked with a frown.

Saber cocked her head and looked at Rin. “…Oh, is that what you meant?” she said with a sly smile. “I suppose it is, but you’ll have to do better than that if you want to impress me.”

Turning a remarkable shade of red, Rin exploded. “What are you talking about?! Where do you even get these ideas? No, nevermind, I don’t want to know. Let’s just get back home.”

Alulim
May 31st, 2011, 02:14 AM
Yay, new chappie~

Grant
May 31st, 2011, 02:26 AM
Ah, I see. It appears I must now offer atonement. Goodb-http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn187/spooky316/Smileys/emot-suicide.gif

See, this is what happens when you try to summon your Persona without checking the Evoker first. Noobs. They always jump in thinking they can just get Thanatos on the first try...

Any ideas on who that Master was in canon? Shirou, Sakura and Shinji couldn't hide themselves. Bazett was probably dead by this point. Zouken wouldn't go out at day (if ever and he wasn't a Master then). I can't think of a reason why Kotomine, Kuzuki or Medea would go out. Ilya maybe?

Anyway is Nero suggesting something else?

Spooky
May 31st, 2011, 12:49 PM
Any ideas on who that Master was in canon? Shirou, Sakura and Shinji couldn't hide themselves. Bazett was probably dead by this point. Zouken wouldn't go out at day (if ever and he wasn't a Master then). I can't think of a reason why Kotomine, Kuzuki or Medea would go out. Ilya maybe?
Only thing Rin thought she knew was that the master's base was in Shinto. At least, that's all I could find. I don't know if it's ever flat out said who it was. In terms of this story I know who it is, but I don't know if it matters since I probably won't mention it again. But who knows?


Anyway is Nero suggesting something else?
What do you think she's suggesting? :cool:

Neir
May 31st, 2011, 02:15 PM
Nero is a raging lesbian?

SeiKeo
May 31st, 2011, 02:19 PM
Yes.

DreamsRequiem
May 31st, 2011, 02:20 PM
Nero is a raging lesbian?

The proper term for her is bisexual, which she openly admitted in the game, I think.

Neir
May 31st, 2011, 02:22 PM
Lesbian is not bisexual. I said lesbian because Rin is not a man. Didn't play Extra, though.

DreamsRequiem
May 31st, 2011, 02:24 PM
mah edit, t'was too slow

Spooky
June 2nd, 2011, 11:58 AM
Yay for more canon rehash :/


90%


“Are you purposefully trying to be killed, or are you simply an idiot?” Saber asked dryly.

It was the following morning. The return trip home was fairly uneventful; the only thing of note was catching sight of Matou Sakura in conversation with someone Rin had never seen before. They seemed to part without incident, so Rin put it out of her mind at the time. The master and servant arrived back at the Tohsaka house with no further incidents.

A phone was cradled against Rin’s shoulder. As she dialed, she responded, “Neither. I will be perfectly fine. I highly doubt that there’s another Master at the school. Besides,” she continued while waiting for the phone to be answered, “I’ll have you there with me. Even on the remote chance I was attacked, you’d be able to handle it, right?”

Saber bristled. “Of course. What do you take me for, an amateur? Not even a hair on your head will be out of place as long as-”

An abrupt wave of the hand cut Saber off.

“I know you’re there, Kirei. It’s me. I just wanted to let you know I’ve summoned a servant, so you can go ahead and formally register me,” Rin said irritably into the phone.

There was a heavy silence as Rin waited for the priest’s response.

“…Understood. Now what? You should come and see me at least once. I have something to give you that I received from your parents. They said to give it to you only if you become a Master before you become an adult.”

“If you’re talking about Father’s will, you’re too late. I figured that out a while ago. Anyway, I have school now so I don’t really have the time. Goodbye,” Rin replied.

“Wait, Rin. If you are a Master now-” The girl hung up the phone, not paying anymore attention to Kirei.

She turned to Saber, idly noting the storm cloud floating above her head. “What were you saying, then?”

Saber stewed for a few seconds. “…Nothing. Isn’t it about time to leave? You wouldn’t want to be late,” she said testily.

As she headed out the door, Rin gave Saber a skeptical look. “What? Did you think of another problem in the minute that I was on the phone?”

“No. Nothing at all,” Saber said flatly before fading out of view.

Shrugging, Rin left the house, trusting Saber to remain with her. It was about a thirty minute walk to the school. When she crossed the gate Rin immediately stopped.

“Do you feel that, Saber? It seems I was wrong after all. There’s already the beginning of a bounded field surrounding the school,” Rin identified with ease, though she was surprised to find such a thing.

“Yes, it’s interesting. Whoever it is must have a high opinion of himself, to set this up so brazenly,” Saber acknowledged.

“Perhaps. Or he’s an idiot. Either way we’ll keep a look out. I want to find this magus and… ‘introduce’ myself to him.” Rin stomped angrily into the school, Saber trailing behind like a shadow.

Later in the Rin day happened to run into Sakura. Upon seeing she needed assistance with a stack of papers, Rin moved in. As she was helping she figured it would be a good time to question Sakura about the woman she was talking to the previous evening.

“…No. Well, she was a strange person and she seemed to be lost. She asked me lots of things, but I couldn't make out what she was saying, so, um…” Apparently Sakura didn’t really know much about her.

After a little more small talk, Sakura left to deliver her papers.

“Well that was pointless. She didn’t know anything,” Saber communicated directly to Rin.

“Hush. It was fine, even without learning anything new,” Rin said wistfully, before continuing on to her next class.

SeiKeo
June 2nd, 2011, 11:59 AM
I highly doubt that there’s another Master at the school.

It never stops being funny.

DreamsRequiem
June 2nd, 2011, 12:18 PM
Ahh, Rin. The Tohsaka blood truly runs within your veins.

Alulim
June 2nd, 2011, 12:45 PM
Update~

Spooky
June 4th, 2011, 02:16 AM
School was over for the day, and everyone had returned home. Well, mostly everyone.

“Alright Saber,” Rin announced, “Now that we’re alone we should check out that bounded field. It’s not targeting me directly, but still to make victims out of the entire school is something I can’t forgive.”

“Well said, Master. As the magus in charge of this city you should allow no one else to use its people like this,” Saber stated.

“…I wouldn’t do this either, Saber,” Rin responded with a sigh. “Honestly, some of the things you say…”

“Yes, I think I understand just what type of person you are now,” Saber said with a nod as they explored one of the hallways.

“You know what, I’m not even going to ask,” Rin muttered under her breath.

The two continued their search of the school from bottom to top; as they came out onto the roof Rin noted that night had already fallen.

“Well, this takes the total up to seven,” Rin said while examining a magical seal. “Hmm, I think this one is the original as well.” She concentrated for a second. “Damn it, I won’t be able to get rid of the whole field. For something this crass, it has tremendous power. In fact…”

“It was probably made by a servant,” Saber finished.

“Correct,” Rin said with narrowed eyes. “This sort of field, one designed to strip the souls as well as the strength from people, could not have been set up by a magus. However… Saber! Why would a servant do something like this?”

“If we are in dire need, it’s possible for a servant to feed on the souls of the victims, directly harvesting their prana. This would only usually be done if what we get from our master isn’t enough,” Saber admitted.

Rin scowled. “As I said before, I’m not planning on doing anything like that.”

“Not to worry, Master, what I’m getting from you is perfectly adequate,” Saber said with assurance. “If something untoward should happen and I do happen to get low, I’m sure we could find a more… pleasant way to recharge me,” she added suggestively.

By this time Rin was starting to get used to her servant’s eccentricities, so she was able to stifle the blush that threatened to force its way across her face. She instead scoffed and turned back to the seal. “W-well anyway, let’s just get rid of this one. It won’t mean anything in the long run, but I can’t just leave it here. It’s unsightly and pisses me off.”

Reaching out her arm, Rin activated her magic crest. “Abzug. Bedienung Mittelstand,” she chanted, kneeling and lightly touching the outside of the seal.

“What, you’re going to erase it? What a waste,” a voice interrupted Rin’s casting.

http://quizilla.teennick.com/user_images/S/SA/SAG/SAGEMOONLIGHT/1228294641_9369_full.jpeg

With a gasp, Rin stood and spun around. There, standing on the school’s water tower, was a man. No, more than that. With those blood-red eyes and azure armor, he could only be…

“A Servant,” Saber said darkly, fading into view. Her crimson longsword was once again clenched in her hand.

“Ah, I see you have one of your own, little miss. Man, what a mistake, announcing myself like that. Oh well, at least now we can get on with it.” With a flourish, he extended his arm to the side. In less than a moment his hand was filled with a deep red spear, the color almost perfectly matching his eyes.

http://www.advancedanime.com/pictures/normal_b3e289c316c02582e8148f1e996cc242.jpg

Rin acted without thinking. She leapt to the side, narrowly avoiding the spearman’s first strike, and fired multiple Gandr shots at the fence surrounding the rooftop. Due to Rin’s mastery of the spell the black spheres tore through the fence, leaving an opening into which Rin dove.

In the intervening seconds Saber had rushed to parry her opponent’s weapon. Now however, it was all for naught. Both Servants gaped at the hole, their fight forgotten.

The blue knight glanced between Saber and Rin’s former location. “…Shouldn’t you…?” he began slowly.

A rush of displaced air was his only answer as Saber seemed to vanish. “Wait… did I really just let her go? Damn, better go deal with it.” The heroic spirit shook his head before he too disappeared.


90%


I'm thinking only one or two more scenes left in the prologue, depending on how I split it up.

ItsaRandomUsername
June 4th, 2011, 02:21 AM
>=3

mangafreak7793
June 4th, 2011, 02:24 AM
:)

Alulim
June 4th, 2011, 02:35 AM
Hooray!

shiningphoenix
June 4th, 2011, 02:48 PM
So this is what happens; Shirou never sees the fight, and thus doesn't get involved.

Spooky
June 4th, 2011, 02:59 PM
This is merely the beginning, the real "fight" hasn't actually started yet.

EnigmaticFellow
June 5th, 2011, 11:55 AM
This fic has so far been getting me excited. Keep up the good work.

Spooky
September 10th, 2011, 12:47 AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4NwP3wes4M8

Trolololololol.

But seriously, what could it mean?!

Alulim
September 10th, 2011, 01:07 AM
Spooky, you're alive!!!







And now I'm going to kill you!!!

mangafreak7793
September 10th, 2011, 01:07 AM
Someone restrain the deer!

DreamsRequiem
September 10th, 2011, 01:09 AM
Sorry, too busy loading my shotgun. *aims at Spooky*

Spooky
September 10th, 2011, 02:17 AM
Rin grimaced as she fell through the air. Even with using prana to aid in the fall, she was still placing an awful lot of trust in her newly-summoned servant…

“No, can’t think like that. I can already feel we have a bond. She’ll definitely catch me in time!”

A flash of red and suddenly she wasn’t moving anymore.

“I’m glad you think so much of me, Master. I think the same of you as well,” Saber said warmly as she set Rin on the ground.

Rin felt her cheeks go hot as she realized she’d thought out loud. “I-idiot! Why did you wait so long to catch me! If you held off any longer I would have been killed!” she tried to cover.

A pat on Rin’s cheek was Saber’s response. “You should know by now I wouldn’t let that happen…” The servant and master locked eyes.

“…CLEARS THROAT!...” a voice announced loudly from the side.

Saber immediately rematerialized her sword and shoved Rin behind her. Turning around, she faced her opponent. “Lancer…” she stated.

“Ah, I see you figured out which servant I am.” The knight of the lance cocked his head. “Not that it would be very difficult, though… considering,” he gestured with his weapon.

“Yes, now I suppose we’ll see if the Knight of the Lance will hold any challenge at all for one such as myself,” Saber boasted. Her sword took on a sheen not unlike the coals at the bottom of a bonfire while wisps of smoke started to drift upwards from the blade.

“Dismissing me so easy, are you? Well, you are the Saber class, but don’t count me out so quickly,” Lancer said with a smirk. He sent out a quick thrust of the spear, more to test Saber’s defenses than as a real attack. It was parried almost before he’d finished moving his arm.

“You can’t really be this pathetic, can you?” said Saber, her voice dripping with condescension.

Lancer leapt back and twirled his weapon. “Haha, no worries,” Lancer laughed. “You’re quick, I see. Well, so am I.”

He shot forwards at impossible speeds and exchanged a flurry of blows with the red-clad knight. Embers flew off the sword each time it connected with the opposing legendary weapon. Taking advantage of a momentary pause in Lancer’s attacks, Saber launched a mighty swing which Lancer was forced to block. Even with his defense, the spear-wielder was blown back nearly 100 feet.

Saber smirked as Lancer got to his feet. “Well? Is that all you have? I guess you aren’t… proficient… in the use of your lance after all,” she mocked.

“Oooh, now that’s going a bit too far. Looks like I’ll have to show you personally just how good I am with my weapon!” Lancer said with a manic grin. He took a sideways stance; lance extended from above his right shoulder down and out towards the other Servant. Lancer’s eyes bulged as his spear acquired an unearthly glow.


http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn187/spooky316/06lancer01e7px.jpg


At the opposite end of the schoolyard, Rin felt it too. It was an oppressive weight forcing down on her so she was unable to move. This, she thought, this can only be his most powerful ability, his trump card. He’s going to actually use his noble phantasm! Rin tried to call out to Saber, but found her voice gone as well. She better avoid this! I’ll never forgive her if she gets killed!

Lancer’s body was coiled, prepared to strike. In just a few short seconds the battle would be decided one way or the other. If he hit, Saber was as good as dead. If not, she’d take advantage and finish him. Lancer opened his mouth to scream his attack-

“Who’s there?!” The call came from not Lancer, but one of Rin’s fellow students who had stumbled onto the scene!

Lancer’s countenance abruptly shifted back to his easy-going attitude. “What. Is someone really interrupting us? Well, gotta take care of this first. Don’t go nowhere, though, we’ll finish this when I get back.”

The Servant flickered and appeared next to the student, who got the point and started to run out of there as fast as he could.

Rin, having regained control of her faculties, immediately headed in the same direction.

“What are you doing, Master? You have no chance against Lancer, you should retreat while he’s otherwise occupied,” Saber tried to convince Rin.

“I can’t do that. I refuse to let that bastard kill an innocent bystander, even if that’s what we’re supposed to do! Let’s go, Saber!”

The pair followed the trail back inside the school and down a hallway, where…

“Oh,” Rin said softly, looking blankly at the dead body on the floor.

“..Saber, find Lancer. If he went back to his master it will be good to know who it is,” Rin said without taking her eyes off the corpse.

Saber nodded and vanished, leaving Rin to walk up to the body.

“Wait,” Rin said as she got closer. “He’s still breathing. That shouldn’t be possible since that lance was shoved through his heart. Who are you?” She tilted the face so she could see it. “…Emiya. Of course it’s you. You had to stay late didn’t you?”

A thought floated up to the forefront of Rin’s mind. “But can I really do that…? There’s no real choice, is there?” She pulled out the pendant her father left her in his will. “With it’s power, maybe…” Rin knelt down and emptied the power into the body in front of her, Emiya Shirou. A minute later he was breathing easier, and his wounds were healing.

Rin sighed and got to her feet. “Well, it’s done. I should go; I don’t want to be here when he wakes up.”


* * *

Saber was waiting for her when she arrived back home.

“Did you get him?” Rin asked right away.

“No, he must have been quicker than I thought. I couldn’t find any trace of him past the school,” Saber admitted. “I scouted the area just around it to be sure, but still nothing.”

“Hmm, that’s too bad. It would have been nice to know who he was working for at lea-”

A thought hit Rin like a battering ram. Her eyes widened as she considered the implications.

“Saber, if somehow that guy from earlier survived, would Lancer go after him again?”

Raising an eyebrow, Saber answered, “Of course, Master. He wouldn’t let an outside observer like that survive. But why would you… Oh. It seems I was right. You are the type of person I thought you were,” a small smile came to Saber’s face. “Very well then, Master, shall we go save this person once again?”


* * *

With directions from Rin, Saber carried her as fast as she could to the Emiya household. Saber landed outside the gate just in time to see a bright flash of bluish-white light and a sound akin to glass shattering. Their foe appeared crouched on the wall in front of them, spared them a glance that seemed somehow disappointed, and sped off into the night.

The two of them stared dumbfounded for a second. “Huh,” Rin finally came back to herself. “Does this mean Emiya is a master as well?”

mangafreak7793
September 10th, 2011, 02:20 AM
Its back!.

PUT DOWN YOUR PITCHFORKS,SHOTGUNS, AND KILLER DEER FOR IT HAS UPDATED.

nununu
September 10th, 2011, 02:31 AM
Maybe, instead of going back in time, Arturia entered Avalon The Sheath? So she can't be summoned because she''s already here, and the Grail summons the next best thing: The caster who (may have?) gave Excalibur to Saber.

Saber is sleeping inside UBW.

shiningphoenix
September 10th, 2011, 02:41 AM
So, I already posted this in another thread about this story, but do the other people here agree with my assessment when I guess that Shirou summoned Tamamo-no-Mae as caster?

nununu
September 10th, 2011, 03:00 AM
Wouldn't he need something to override the connection made Avalon? Or not have Avalon in him at all? I think I remember a snippet here(I think the day before yesterday) where Kirutsugu, who summoned Tamamo-no-Mae, stuck a yako inside Shirou inside which acted as the catalyst. I was too late to ask how, in that story, Kiritsugu got his hands on the (supposedly)Yata no Kagami.

Alulim
September 10th, 2011, 03:45 AM
So, I already posted this in another thread about this story, but do the other people here agree with my assessment when I guess that Shirou summoned Tamamo-no-Mae as caster?Given the title of this story Archerko must be called!!!



Also, good update~

EnigmaticFellow
September 10th, 2011, 10:02 AM
This thread...

IT'S ALIVE!!!!!!!

Spooky
September 10th, 2011, 11:36 AM
So, I already posted this in another thread about this story, but do the other people here agree with my assessment when I guess that Shirou summoned Tamamo-no-Mae as caster?
Lol, you're here too? I gave you a semi-answer on SB, but I refuse to say anything else I haven't already said. :p

ItsaRandomUsername
September 10th, 2011, 02:21 PM
Huzzah!

nitewind
September 10th, 2011, 02:59 PM
It's alive!!! YAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!! OOOOHHHHHHH YYYYYEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Spooky
September 13th, 2011, 01:13 AM
To end the prologue and bring it full circle, have some more near-plagiarism!

BTW, this is where I may start to get some complaints, but even so I'm not going to change it.


90%


It was a thrust like lightning.
A spearhead thrust to pierce my heart.
Trying to dodge it would be useless.
Being lightning, it’s invisible to the human eye.

But…
The lightning that tries to pierce me…
…Is repelled by the moonlight that tries to save me.

Shatter, the sound of glass breaking.
No, the sound before me is off, not quite right.
The gown she is wearing is elegant and flowing.
The sound wasn’t glass at all.
It was actually the sound of ice.
A shield of ice warding off certain death.

“I would know… are you my Master?”

She asks in a melodious tone.

“According to the contract, I have heeded the call.
Henceforth unto the end, I shall ward you from harm and bewitch your enemies. Servant Caster is now at your command.”

Yes, the contract has been completed.
When she chose me as her Master…
I'm sure I swore to help her too.

The moonlight still lights up the darkness.
As if following the enchantress's example, the shed again falls silent.

Time has stopped.
The scene lasts less than a second.
But…
I'm sure I'll remember this scene vividly even when I've gone to hell.

The face slightly turned.
The slitted eyes.
The instant becomes an eternity.
Her shimmering icy-blue hair undulates in the wind.

ItsaRandomUsername
September 13th, 2011, 01:14 AM
Nope. Definitely not Saber.

Nice~

mangafreak7793
September 13th, 2011, 01:16 AM
I think it's a yuki-onna...

Or is that Medea?

But most importantly. Where's the fluffy tail?

ItsaRandomUsername
September 13th, 2011, 01:21 AM
Sorry, but your Casko is in another fanfic.



............up yours, Toad. :/

Spooky
September 13th, 2011, 01:22 AM
Lol, has it been so long you guys don't even remember earlier pages in the thread?

EDIT: Now that the prologue's done, I'm thinking of posting to FFN. Yes? No?

mangafreak7793
September 13th, 2011, 01:23 AM
No I forgot.

Spooky
September 13th, 2011, 01:26 AM
No I forgot.
http://securepubs.com/graphics/memory_bottle.gif

nununu
September 13th, 2011, 01:40 AM
No I forgot.

IIRC, it's supposed to be Vivienne- The Lady of the Lake.

Spooky
September 13th, 2011, 01:42 AM
*cough*wrong name*cough* :p

nununu
September 13th, 2011, 01:42 AM
Ah right, Charis. I think. I still find it easier to remember the name Vivienne though, 'cause ah, PSU. :illya:
2786

ItsaRandomUsername
September 13th, 2011, 01:43 AM
Port this to FF.net!

DO EET

Alulim
September 13th, 2011, 01:51 AM
Al supports this.

Spooky
September 13th, 2011, 01:56 AM
Very well, it will be done. Be back in... we'll see I guess.

EDIT: Guess I can't. Gotta wait 2 days.

Alulim
September 13th, 2011, 02:04 AM
Ah, Al had that problem too~

Twas a pain.

burningclaw2
September 13th, 2011, 12:54 PM
I always think of the Lady of the Lake as Nimue...

Spooky
September 15th, 2011, 02:56 AM
If anyone cares, I just posted it to FFN. If you do read it there, let me know if I missed any of the formatting changes they decided to give me for no good reason. :mad:

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7383345/1/FateBig_Brother_Complex

Alulim
September 15th, 2011, 03:06 AM
Ah, the annoying time-limit on posting fics has expired for you. Good good.

Keyne
September 15th, 2011, 05:07 AM
I'm not at all happy how things turned out. First of all, what kind of wish would a still living elemental want from the Grail?

VelspertheCat
September 15th, 2011, 05:25 AM
Seibah's contract to be broken?