Create your own Modern Fiction Servants

[JetKinen]

I just want to give shoutouts to that great Big Poppa Pump profile

[BoletariaPrince]

Class: Saber
True Name: Unknown
Titles: Slayer of Demon
Sex: Male
Alignment: Neutral Good
Strength: B
Endurance: B
Agility: C
Mana: C
Luck: C

Class Skills:

Magic Resistance: B

Personal Skill:

Demon Hunter: A
Saber is a Demon Slayer in the zenith of his Life. From the Weakest dregs to the Highest of Archdemon he have slain them all. All of his stats is raised by one rank when facing enemy with demonic aspect.

Bravery: A+
Saber has braved many danger, from fellow humans, dragons, and demons. Not even the presence of an Almighty God of Demon could shakes his mental fortitude.

Battle Continuation: A
As long as he's not dead or wounded fatally he could fight like he normally could.

Eye of the Mind (True): A
A Skill tempered with countless battle and death against enemy far stronger than he is, Saber could calmly observe his enemy's attack, pattern, weakness, and plan his attacks even in the middle of battle.


Noble Phantasm:

Longsword +10 "Sword of the Slayer": C/B
Saber's most basic sword, and his first weapon. This weapon accompanies Saber throughout his journey from the start right until the end. The most frequent weapon he used byfar, this weapon raise in rank when facing demons or their minions.

Nexial Binding "Soul Bound to Nexus" : EX
Saber could not be killed permanently, his soul will only be sent to the Nexus, a place of unknown origin that is separated from the world and could fight once more when he returns. Be Noted that too many death without harvesting and collecting souls will eventually degrade Saber's mind and if it goes on Saber will loses all his sanity and will and fades away.

Northern Regalia "Two Halves as One": A+/++/+++
A Blade created by forging the Soulbrandt and Demonbrandt with the soul of the Archdemon, The False King. It retains both weapons ability of Alignment boost, and Anti-Human, Spirit, and Demon Properties.

Bag of Holding "Invisible Bag of the Wanderer": EX
It could keep any item as long as Saber could bear its weight. in it contains many items that Saber acquired in his life including Healing items, Enchantment items, Armors, Shields, Weapons and other utility items.


.................................................. .................................................. .

^Demon's Souls Protagonist in New Game+
Nothing flashy and showy though, as Demon's Souls basically YOU playing someone that would die a lot and have to fight smart and be pragmatic as everything is trying to kill you. Sometimes being a Knight who runs in circles, dodging attack, exploiting the field, and generally being a pussy that doesn't like to fight head-on without a trick or two could save your life and helps you surviving the crapsack world of Demon's souls.

[qwertyfatcat]

first problem, too many noble phantasms.

Second problem, your servant is the protagonist of demon's souls in new game+. "you" is an OC who exists to enact out power fantasies in a crapsack world. Besides, that character definitely doesn't have instincts with how often he/she dies due to not seeing things coming. Besides, there's too many A's and B's in the page.

[Ergast]

Besides the instinct and the "too many NP" thing, I don't see many problems. What I would change is get rid of Instinct (what the character, and the players, develop is literally Eye of the mind (true), in this case) and of most of the NPs. Keep those that are more significative and that's that. By example, the Northern Regalia, the Nexus Binding and either the Longsword +10 (because it's his first weapon) or the Dark Silver Shield (because it is the most overpowered shield in the game). Personally I'll keep the longsword, and let the dark silver shield as just equipment that isn't mentioned.

[BoletariaPrince]

Trying to convert <Hero> of Dota to <Heroic Spirit> is hard, Dota got clusters of non-human <Hero> and some OP Ability if converted and with liberal use of logic to convert in-game time to real time. Void could just stop time and mash everyone in the face, Rubick could copy any skills by observing the mana or prana that is used in that skill, he could copy excaliblast and use it with his staff... heck he could shot someone with kardel's assassinate with his staff...



So here's Doom or Lucifer, in this case Saber when the Grail is piss drunk or controlled by the Dire and Radiant.


He that burns and is not consumed, devours and never sated, kills and beyond all judgement-- Lucifer brings doom to all who stands against him. Bearing away souls on the tip of a fiery swords, he is the Fallen One, once-favored general from the realm behind the light, cast out for the sin of defiance: he would not kneel.

Six times his name was tolled from the great bell of Vashundol. Six and sixty times his wings were branded, until only smoking stumps remained. without wings, he slipped loose from the tether that bounds him within the light and he fell screaming to earth. A crater in the desert, Paradise Lost. Now he attacks without mercy, without motive, the only living being able to move freely between the seven dark dominion. Lashed by inescapable needs, twisted by unimaginable talents, Doom carries his own hell with him wherever he goes. Defiant to the last. Eventually, the world will belong to Doom.

Class: Saber
True Name: Lucifer
Titles: Doombringer, Doom, Lord of the Seventh Hell.
Sex: Male
Alignment: Chaotic Evil
Strength: A
Endurance: B
Agility: D
Mana: B
Luck: A

Class Skills:

Magic Resistance: C

Personal Skill:

Devil's Luck: A
Permanently increase Luck to A, and prevents any decrease to Luck.

Devour: EX
A different form of Absorption, Saber kills and devours the soul of his enemy and in return gained their Spell and Abilities. Does not work against <Heroes>, or <Ancient Entities>.

Divinity: F
A Former General of the Lord's Army, Highest and Second only to God, he turned his back from the light. Cursed and Casted down to Earth, he's now as far away from what he was as it could be. Increased damage taken by Divine, and Holy weapons and spells.

Golder Rule: A+
Saber's greed is just as insatiable as his hungers for souls and destruction. Golds comes as easily as his horns gored through his enemies.


Noble Phantasm:

Demon Shard (Demonic Fragment of the Blade of Worlds): A+
A Reforged and Corrupted fragment of the Blade of Worlds. Capable of slicing through anything even dimension. Increased effect when used against or by <Hero>.

Scorched Earth (Hell on Earth): C
Saber wreath large area of his immediate surrounding with Hellfire, the fire will follows Saber if he moves from his position. Saber's Agility raised to C when casting this spell and it will heal any wounds that Saber currently sustains.

Doom (Curse of the Bell of Vashundol): EX
Saber cast a potent curse to his enemy that cannot be dispeled by anything even Saber himself. Anyone afflicted by it cannot use prana, shutting down their Noble Phantasm and Spell while taking continuous damage from the curse, they also cannot enter Spirit Form and it disabled any Skills that the target may have. Last for 80 Minutes or the target died and it wont start counting down if Doom is still within 200 meters. Could only be used once per day. A ranked and higher magic resistance could reduce the damage but the effects cannot be reduced.


^fixed some of it, some as in a few.



Dota 2's own Lucifer or Doom, the guy's ulti is annoying, and hurts like no tomorrow, basically making supports, nukers, and initiators useless, turn carries into swiss cheese and tankers into punching bags. Scepter equipped and Tanker build he's near impossible to beat one-on-one, Final Boss worthy of any RPG.

[Der Ritter]

Wow. Very OP. Much Sueness. Such Stats. Wow.

[BoletariaPrince]

right? bastards too OP can't write a story with him, and so I'm stuck...

[Christemo]

The issue is less that Doom is too powerful a character, it's more that you wanked him to absurd levels.

[Tuvarkz]

You should remove L? Death, it just doesn't work outside of DotA 2's system tbh, and Prana Burst (flame) is not persitent with his lore. Scorched Earth should be downranked to C, with only a one rank Agi boost and just a minor regeneration factor. Also Doom does not block passive health regen nor passive things (Ergo NPs like God Hand and Diarmuid's lances would not be blocked). Also DotA2 heroes only have a baseline factor of 25% magical res, more than C Mres would be too much.

EDIT: Now that I'm at it, I should make one for Sven

Sven is the bastard son of a Vigil Knight, born of a Pallid Meranth, raised in the Shadeshore Ruins. With his father executed for violating the Vigil Codex, and his mother shunned by her wild race, Sven believes that honor is to be found in no social order, but only in himself. After tending his mother through a lingering death, he offered himself as a novice to the Vigil Knights, never revealing his identity. For thirteen years he studied in his father's school, mastering the rigid code that declared his existence an abomination. Then, on the day that should have been his In-Swearing, he seized the Outcast Blade, shattered the Sacred Helm, and burned the Codex in the Vigil's Holy Flame. He strode from Vigil Keep, forever solitary, following his private code to the last strict rune. Still a knight, yes...but a Rogue Knight. He answers only to himself.

Class: Saber
True Name: Sven, the Rogue Knight
Sex: Male
Alignment: Lawful Good
Strength: A++
Endurance: B
Agility: C
Mana: C
Luck: C

Class Skills:
Magic Resistance: C
Riding: D

Personal Skills:

Bravery: B
Storm Hammer: C
Sven's gauntlet unleashes a bolt of lightning directed towards an enemy and his nearby allies. Surprisingly easy to dodge if the enemy moves in a burst of speed.
Great Cleave: B
Sven's slashes are so powerful, that upon landing a hit, nearby enemies will also receive a considerable fraction of the damage upon themselves.
Warcry: C
A roar of battle that makes Sven and his allies slightly faster and much more impervious to physical damage for a short duration

Noble Phantasms:

God's Strength: A
Sven channels his full might, tripling the power of his strikes

Wuldastron, Twin Blade of Giants: B
A massive sword, fit for Sven's strength.

Black King Bar: A
Can be activated to increase Magic Resistance to A+ rank for a short duration. Constant use reduces the Noble Phantasm's duration.

[BoletariaPrince]

it does, when he got Aghanim though (the passive that is, regen still going), and some of those stats were used by well, lv25 Full item Doom. Like any hero that I wrote but not post. Anti-Mage with Manta and so on. Other than that, good idea. fixed

[Der Ritter]

Gil could dispel that curse of Doom's. He bathed in the curses of All the World's Evils and came out no worse because his ego is just that big. That curse was doomed for failure.

[qwertyfatcat]

For Lucifier, I'm looking up that demon shard and I'm not finding anything about it slicing through dimensions though I do find information on that it could only be wield by heroes. Doom is OP as Christemo said in that its boring being in the war and is just meant to win without letting the opponent really do anything about it. Besides, Gil already went swimming in a pool of all the world's evil and chuckled about it afterwards. Devil's luck should only really be there to denote that his luck can't be lowered, though the value of such skill can depend on you. Scorched earth isn't really NP worthy in that it's not that game changing like an NP or isn't a legendary equipment. Golden Rule doesn't really work that well with him in that it doesn't really reflect in DOTA 2 other than him getting extra money when he devours. Speaking of devour, it doesn't really seem that impressive. Sure it can kill something damn well and give him skills from what he kills, but what's so special about killing something not a "hero" unless a powerful dead apostle or other divine spirit is there? Fuyuki City isn't crawling with that many magical entities and gaining magi skills isn't so special since a heroic spirit is far more powerful than that. That skill could be reworked to allow Lucifer to gain a skill or small NP from "devouring" a heroic spirit, giving him some cool tricks and toys from other heroes and bringing more versatility to his kit. Sure, he's not eating a "creep" but it kinda is lackluster when comparing the environment for most HGW settings. Divinity should be changed to E rank since anything strictly against divine beings are all lumped up in there.

It feels as though you designed him to counter Cu Culainn with that devil's luck in his skill set, since luck is one of the few ways to get past it. Doom definitely needs to be nerfed in that his EX NP wanks off to him.

For Sven, strength is too high (Hercules coming out with A+, which is saying something), storm hammer should be a noble phantasm since its from his gauntlet, great cleave is more of a fighting style and isn't bringing anything that special, god's strength shouldn't really triple his strength but could increase rank of strength when activated but cannot be stacked upon, a better description of Wuldastron would be appreciated and black king bar isn't used just by him so it shouldn't be there.

His sheet needs a little reworking, but a kit could definitely be made for him with strengths and meaningful weaknesses in that while he is a powerful melee fighter that buffs himself like a berserker, he has problems with kiting and initiating. If a fanfic were made with your servant idea, it would be nice seeing him work with another servant, though warcry does need a better gauge of how much it powers up allies.

[Tuvarkz]

I put BKB in there because among all of the items Sven ever gets, it's the one that you get almost 100% of the time if the match isn't a complete one-side curbstomp, and Sven is amongst the heroes that buy BKB the most often (according to dotabuff, the other two are PA and SF, and by comparing matches played vs times bought, Sven gets BKB more often than PA). Also, wasn't the + modifier a conditional increase? (A++ referring to how strong he gets to hit when buffed by God's Strength. Also, in terms of how much you can hit in a single strike disregarding crits in DotA2, Sven takes the cake by a large margin)

[qwertyfatcat]

BKB is still something other Heroes get. If I said that Garen from league of legends had the infinity edge as his NP, that wouldn't work because other champions can get it or if Master Yi had the phantom dancer despite a lot of other champions buy it. Even if Sven buys it the most, that's just a trend that can change when items, gameplay or heroes get changed or reworked. Unless there was some background lore stating that he wield the BKB, then it doesn't really fit. I mean that his strength should start off at A rather than A+ since he already has 2 modifiers for strength. Saying that you're making your servant have the same strength stat as berserker is saying that Sven is as strong as Hercules, who may or may not have held the sky on his shoulders. Unless his feats are saying he could do that then I'm not buying A+ strength at base. Besides his kit with god strength buff is already pretty strong as it is. He hits under Herc strength but is getting close to there.

Also, I don't mind the Demon Shard's existence as an NP or item but it shouldn't be overwanked. If the sword can cut through dimensions then I shouldn't be questioning where this information came from.

[Gray]

Name: Deimos
The false "Marked One", "The other One":
Brother to Kratos the destroyer of Olympus, Deimos was a demigod born of Zeus and a woman named Callisto, in early years he was feared to be too weak to join the spartan Army but the destiny of his strange birthmark (believed to a be a prophesied mark of the Destroyer of Olympus )made it so he would be captured by the Olympians to be imprisoned the domain of Death, Thanatos himself. Many years of imprisonment and torture hardened him into a fine warrior though not the the extent of his brother.

Class: Lancer, Berserker
Alignment: Lawful Evil
Gender: Male

Strength: A
Endurance: A
Agility: B
Magical Energy: C+
Luck: E
Noble Phantasm: B

Class Abilities:
Magic Resistance: C Cancel spells with a chant below two verses. Cannot defend against Magecraft on the level of High-Thaumaturgy and Greater Rituals
Mad Enhancement: C rank up for all parameters except Luck and Mana, but in exchange one can no longer think and speak properly

Skills:
Bravery: Rank A Increased Melee damage and resistance from Mental interference (went through a lot of torture and long imprisonment, he was still functional immediately after freeing)
Divinity: Rank B+ Descendant of Zeus Chief God of the Olympians
Prana Burst (flames) A: Can imbue his weapons with a fiery aura (demonstrated via his gauntlet in boss fight)
Noble Phantasm
Arms of Sparta:
A spear and Shield once wielded by his brother when he was spartan general these arms embody the spirit of the spartan warrior, A shield capable of blocking attacks from Death himself and reflecting back the power and a Spear that will always return to the wielders grip once thrown.
Rank: B
Type: Anti-Unit Noble Phantasm
Range:1-99
Maximum Target: 5

[qwertyfatcat]

Name: Deimos
The false "Marked One", "The other One":
Brother to Kratos the destoryer of Olympus, Deimos was a demigod born of Zeus and a woman namd Callisto, in early years he was feared to be too weak to join the spartan Army but the destiny of his strange birthmark (believed to a be a prophesied mark of the Destroyer of Olympus )made it so he would be captured by the Olympians to be imprisoned the domain of Death, Thanatos himself. Many years of imprsionment and torture hardened him into a fine warrior though not the the extent of his brother.

Class: Lancer, Berserker
Alignment: Lawful Evil
Gender: Male

Strength: A
Endurance: A
Agility: B
Magical Energy: C+
Luck: E
Noble Phantasm: B

Class Abilities:
Magic Resistance: C Cancel spells with a chant below two verses. Cannot defend against Magecraft on the level of High-Thaumaturgy and Greater Rituals
Mad Enhancement: C rank up for all parameters except Luck and Mana, but in exchange one can no longer think and speak properly

Skills:
Bravery: Rank A Increased Melee damage and resistance from Mental interference (went through a lot of torture and long imrisoment, he was still functional immediatly after freeing)
Divinity: Rank B+ Descendent of Zeus Chief God of the Olympians
Prana Burst (flames): Can imbue his weapons with a fiery aura (demonstrated via his guantlet in boss fight)
Noble Phantasm
Arms of Sparta:
A spear and Shield once wielded by his brother when he was spartan general these arms embody the spirit of the spartan warrior, A shield capable of blocking attacks from Death himself and reflecting back the power and a Spear that will always return to the wielders grip once thrown.
Rank: B
Type: Anti-Unit Noble Phantasm
Range:1-99
Maximum Target: 5

Divinity should be B unless there are special exceptions for why his divinity is higher than Hercules'. Also, prana burst needs a rank.

Other than that, pretty good.

[Siriel]

Divinity should be B unless there are special exceptions for why his divinity is higher than Hercules'.

Heracles is A.

[qwertyfatcat]

then no problem then.

[Zenosyke]

I don't know if anyone has done something like this. Just an idea in progress but it could be fun for an Extra fic.

Servant Class: Caster

Spirit: Megaman X

Gender – N/A (identifies as male)

Height – 160 cm (5 ft. 3 in.)

Weight – 57 kg (125.4 lbs)

Natural Enemies – Sigma, Weil, Berserker class servants

Image Color – Light Blue



Stats:

Strength – D

Endurance – C

Agility – B

Mana – A+

Luck – D

Noble Phantasm – E~A



Class Skills:

Territory Creation – EX

As long as Caster is not in combat he is capable of accessing a layer of reality never touched by human hand alive or dead known as “Cyberspace”.

Item Construction – B
Caster can recreate most objects, adapted as needed, after having seen or handled them, but is incapable of creating items with innate magical properties.



Personal Skills:
Charisma – C (B)

Caster lead a mega-city containing the vast majority of the remaining human and reploid population on Earth after the Elf Wars. His own dislike of being in a leadership position causes this to be constantly Rank Down except in all but the most dire or circumstances in which his natural leadership shows through.

Eye of the Mind (True) – A

Having been in a state of almost constant war for more than 100 years Caster is capable of calm analysis of the battlefield and able to decide an appropriate course of action in nearly any combat situation, often to the point of “Expecting the Unexpected”.

Unnatural Body – A





Noble Phantasm:

Variable Weapons System “Unlimited Evolutionary Potential” – E~A

[Bloble]

Territory Creation doesn't make sense, since Cyberspace is just another layer of reality. He's not creating it at all, just accessing it.