A Night Once Dreamed (Rin x Ryougi)

[Five_X]

Well, here's that 30k word fic I wrote for Leo on the weekend. I wrote it in under two days, and I'm quite impressed with it. Leo himself has already read it, and of course now I'm posting it up for you people to read, as well. It's in its completely unedited, unabridged form, so yes there are typos and stuff.

Note that this is a very slight relatively mild AU - there's no Araya shenanigans, Mikiya doesn't exist, some places are changed around, and Touko and Shiki are old friends.

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A Night Once Dreamed

Five years ago...


Rin Tohsaka, just barely into her teens, hardly knew this city. It was a foreign, strange place, far from the simple familiarity of her home in Fuyuki. It was hard for her to admit, but there was much that she didn't know about the world. Even here, far from Fuyuki but still in Japan, the air smelled different, the dialects were mixed and confusing, and the people all seemed taller, more imposing. It was as if the whole population had been supplanted by hidden yakuza members.


But, she was the Tohsaka family head now. She wouldn't be frightened by such things. It wasn't proper for someone like her to submit to strangers just because they had a different attitude.


So, she stuck up her nose at this place, rejecting it, refusing to learn to love it as she did her home. Its wide streets, dark corners and smoke-scented nights held no interest to her, and she walked along the pavement with a haughty stride, sometimes glancing about at the other pedestrians. To her, their clothing looked simpler, the textures plain compared to her red, black and white dress, bought for her by her father long ago. It didn't fit as well as it did then, but it was the closest thing she had to a real 'gift' from her father. He passed away years ago, and with that responsibility had been shifted all onto Rin's little shoulders.


Many of those responsibilities, however had been transferred to her new legal guardian, Kirei Kotomine, a priest. The two weren't completely unknown to each other; Kirei was once Tohsaka's father's apprentice, all of a sudden learning magecraft from him in order to participate in some war. Since then he, as a makeshift father figure to the young Rin Tohsaka, was forced to bring her along on his various meetings and journeys, regardless of where they took him. Either for her sake or his own, as he was getting older, Kirei never travelled outside of Japan, staying at least within that small chain of islands in the Pacific. Rin assumed his real reason was the latter, since she never really had any love for him. He was a strange priest, prone to speaking for hours on end, so it seemed. Rin became more and more dismissive of him as she grew older, tossing her hair, huffing, and turning about on her heel, whenever he asked something particularly difficult of her.


It seemed, sometimes, that he was trying to control her life. Rin couldn't abide by that, but had to go along with him anyways.


This trip, though, was a bit special. Apparently, as far as Rin had learned from the priest's vague words, this would be the last time he would actively leave Fuyuki. He had some documents to look over and sign, and so he had agreed to make one last journey to this fairly large city a great distance away from Fuyuki.


Rin shook her little shoulders and scoffed as Kirei placed a small hand on her shoulder, catching her attention and letting her see where the meeting was to take place. It was a partly sunny day, not too pretty, but at the same time fairly warm and good for walking around outside. Rin didn't want to be guided around by her guardian, so she tried her best to get away whenever she could.


Entering the outdoor dining area of a small, local restaurant that specialized in spicy foods, Rin could hardly keep her eyes off of a park just nearby, a stone's throw away from where Kirei seemed to be directing her. Rin looked ahead, catching sight of a table for two topped with a great umbrella. The whole place smelled warm and spicy, the scent thick in the air. It reminded Rin greatly of Chinese food that she had been taught to cook, and it made her feel almost at home, just in this one space.


Sitting at the table was the member of the Holy Church that Kirei was apparently supposed to meet with here. Rin didn't know much about her, but it was clear that the woman and Kirei had some sort of acquaintance with each other. The woman smiled brightly and waved at Kirei, who just gave a stoic nod. He was here for business, after all.


The woman had short, blue-black hair, and her menu was closed and set aside, as though she'd already made her order. Some other papers were stacked up on the stone table, and Rin blanched at the sight of them. She had to wonder what about them could make Kirei of all people entertained, but then again... he was so twisted and strange that those kinds of things could be humourous or fun or something to him, rather than just being boring documents.


Even if Rin wanted to sit with them, though, there were only two chairs at the table, and the closest seat was an abandoned, small stool that probably belonged to the staff of the restaurant. Rin let out a little grumble, angered by the fact that she was left out, even if the meeting that Kirei was having fundamentally bored her. Any opportunity lost was, to her, a sort of failure in itself, so even if she wasn't going to sit with them, she at least wanted the comfort of knowing that was possible.


But at the very least, she had to note, this offered her an entirely different opportunity. While Kirei and the woman from the Church were so engrossed in their conversation, Rin decided to sneak off into the park. She wasn't interested in the children that might have been there; despite her own age she was quite mature, and preferred talking with adults to talking with normal kids. Such was the life of a magus, but she didn't dislike it. One of the few things that truly interested her in life was the advancement of her own skills, and there was little that she wouldn't do to improve herself. So, in this park, she hoped just to get away from Kirei and his boring attitude, and perhaps find some quiet, alone.


Away from the all too familiar smells of the restaurant and the bustle of people and their noisy talking, Rin felt alone in the secluded park, resting herself in its tranquillity. She smiled and let out a deeply satisfied sigh, happy to be here. It was almost enough to remind her of home, but it seemed to lack the eerie quiet of her mansion, and instead felt calm and peaceful. Without the sights and sounds of the city, there was nothing here to bother her. Rin sat down against a thin-trunked tree with her legs outstretched, letting herself relax.


Just as she was about to close her eyes and tune out the whole world, though, she heard some rustling along the gravel path in the park, and checked out what was going on.


“You alright, kid?” Rin heard someone say. It was a girl's voice, sounding honest but rough, and coming from somewhere Rin couldn't see.


As if from nowhere, a girl who looked to be about sixteen or seventeen appeared in front of Rin, looking down at her with a curious frown. “Shouldn't you be in the sand pit or something? It's dangerous for a kid to just go take a nap anywhere.” The girl crouched down to Rin's level, looking right in her eyes. For some reason she wore a plain kimono even though this wasn't any sort of holiday, and her hair was plain and straight.


“I can defend myself, you know!” Said Rin, crossing her arms. “I'm better than a normal girl, so you shouldn't treat me like one.”


The crouching girl gave a soft, curious chuckle, and raised up a hand to ruffle Rin's long brown hair. “If you say so, kid. Just watch out, alright? Kids've gotta stop having their parents hold their hands all the time, but you can't just expect them to do everything.”


Rin frowned, puffing out her chest, her lips pursed. “If you want to know, I'm Rin Tohsaka. You probably don't know me, but it's polite to exchange names.” She was a little proud of herself, defending her honour against this older girl who didn't seem to express any vast range of emotions. It was as though she was hardly a person at all, just an apparition that Rin saw there in front of her, scolding her and at the same time having some kind of conversation with her. It was almost surreal, in a sense, and there was something unusual about this girl that Rin couldn't put her finger on.


“Alright, Shiki, I can't find it here. Let's go.” There was the voice of an older woman, and the kimono-clad girl lazily looked over, to a spot behind the tree that Rin was leaning against.


She shrugged, put her hands on her knees, and stood up, taking one last look at Rin before leaving, disappearing as quickly as she had arrived there. Not a trace was left of her even being there, and Rin wondered, looking around.


“Don't hurt yourself, kid.” It was an echo, within Rin's mind, as if it hadn't been said verbally at all. It was something to ponder, certainly, and yet mo matter how hard she looked, that girl in the kimono couldn't be seen anywhere. She was an enigma, one that had fully caught Rin's attention, even as the curious girl she was. This was something to investigate, but not now.


Unable to stay still due to her reinvigorated curiosity, Rin ran off to the restaurant where Kirei and his acquaintance were still talking, and she joined them without a word, standing dutifully by Kirei's side even as she kept wondering about that strange girl that had talked to her.

-- --

Later that evening, it was time to leave for Fuyuki.


Kirei apparently got something out of that meeting, but Rin didn't know what, being unable to read his rarely discernible expression. He got behind the wheel of a car, and waited for Rin to hop in the back seat, getting close to one window and buckling herself up. Kirei drove without a seat belt, apparently, not understanding the purpose of such things. Or perhaps, he understood their purpose more perfectly than others.


“If humans will all naturally die someday, then why do we attempt to prevent death and prolong life? The obvious answer, if we seek safety, should be to get rid of the car, rather than add the seat belt.” His words were grim as usual, but even with his deep, masculine voice, Kirei didn't have the tone of someone intentionally speaking of darker themes. He said those words as if they were natural to him. Rin found it strange, but she knew at the very least that an apparent acquaintance of his in Fuyuki had died not long ago, and perhaps that drove his thoughts more to death than usual. By this point, though, used to his unusual thoughts, Rin rarely really listened to the man. Instead, she looked outside at the passing scenery, hearing the car rumble to life as she tuned her attention to the world around her.


It was dark out, and even with the windows all shut Rin could hear the pattering of rain on the glass and the sound of wheels sliding through shallow puddles. The weather had taken a turn for the worse, and it made Rin shiver. Soon they were on the outskirts of the city, still far from Fuyuki, but in an area so isolated that there was no real light but a few old lampposts.


Bored, Rin placed her chin in her hands, staring out the window. She hated long car rides like this, and yet nothing seemed to grab her attention. Outside, there was just the gathering rain, the dark, and what felt like miles of forest all around.


Yet, under a light... there was something strange.


Rin almost missed that one, barely noticeable sight, but at the last moment it caught her eye: a girl in a heavily wet kimono, her semi-short hair matted from the rain, tight to her face. There was a long, dark line, thick enough to see from the moving car, that went down from the kimono's collar all the way down to its bottom hem, like the after-mark of a heavy teardrop down the girl's clothes. Rin's little chest clenched at that sight, and even with those few details, she could understand who it was, without any doubt in her mind.


That was the same girl from the park... but what was she doing there? Rin wondered, trying to keep her gaze on the lonesome figure, but the car moved ever forward, and sooner than Rin could process this all the girl had disappeared from sight as Kirei turned the car around a corner.


Who was she?


Rin's thoughts lingered on that girl for the rest of the night.

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[Five_X]

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Present day...



“This is the place, huh?” Rin checked the address she'd been given by an informant working in the area, roughly written on a piece of folded paper in hard pencil.


Half a decade and a Grail War had tempered her, and now Rin Tohsaka was far from the same girl she was when she'd first visited this city. Her personality had been softened, perhaps, but made more acute and empathetic, even more so towards exactly one other person, whom she had been wondering about for the past five years.


That girl in the rain.


Many times Rin had awoken from uneasy dreams in which she had been so close – so close, so vividly close – to reaching that girl, speaking with her and understanding her. Dreams in which she ran up and was impossibly close to touching her cold, rain-drenched cheek, only to awake before any conclusion could be met. Each dream had a slightly different scenario, but all shared the same night, the same theme. All of the sensations of that one night returned to her in false world of the dreams: the smell of the forest rain, the sound of the car splashing through muddy pools of water, and the low, cool feel of the air. Rin had memorized them all, but no matter what she did, there was no way that she could reach that girl in the kimono.


So, the time had come for her to do what she couldn't do even in her dreams. She had to find that girl. She hadn't even thought of what she would do after finding her; all that mattered was finding her, and making sure that she was actually real, and not some imagined figure that had appeared one day. Rin knew well how the mind could play all kinds of tricks, only reinforced with time and focus, but she wanted this to be true more than anything else.


In her home of Fuyuki, there was nothing really left for her. The man she had feelings for, Emiya Shirou, had fallen in love with her sister, and they were living together in his house. Rin felt almost like an intruder there, breaking the tranquillity of their happy, steady life, and so she tried to avoid Fuyuki for most of the year, even though she loved her sister and she cared about the well-being of her friends. It was just that... a dream had recalled her elsewhere.


It felt like a completely chance event, then, when the exact person that Rin had to visit on behalf of her friend Shirou lived in the exact town that Rin remembered from her youth, five years ago. She almost lost her breath at that revelation; after all, she only really needed a puppet body for her friend, nothing more. That was a highly specialized form of magecraft, to make an actual human body, without any visible flaws in its construction. There was just one magus who could really do something like that, and Rin took this opportunity with utmost haste.


Her name was Touko Aozaki, and she lived in that old, modern city that Rin used to think so strange and foreign. She was the only person that could help Rin with her real problem, as she happened to run a sort of detective service, looking for people and objects. Of course, Touko herself was more interested in things of a magical nature, but Rin imagined that, given enough incentive and a strong enough plea, the magus would look for some strange girl in a kimono.


Rin counted her blessings, already unbelievably lucky that the exact person she needed was in such a close proximity. She'd learned from a freelance magus in the area that Touko Aozaki was a master of puppetry and a capable magus, but there was a catch that Rin didn't even need to be directly told about: Touko was a dangerous person to associate.


The woman herself probably wasn't inherently evil or violent, but Rin knew the goals and ideas of the Mage's Association that presided over all magi in the world, and its thoughts on people like Touko. To be able to so perfectly recreate a human body as a puppet was grounds for a Sealing Designation, and so Touko was forced to become an underground magus. People like Rin, who wanted to keep their reputations intact, were best off avoiding people like Touko, since even vaguely associating with a Sealing Designated magus would lead to suspicion.


In this case, though, Rin was willing to take a risk like that. If it meant finding that girl again, then it would be worth having to operate with utmost secrecy. After her experiences in the Grail War, Rin hadn't been left with a particularly favourable view on magecraft and the people who practised it. The Mage's Association had far less value to it than it once held for her, and so Rin wasn't sure if she even cared about studying professionally at the Clock Tower in London. If magi like Touko were perfectly adept in their fields, then there was no reason for Rin to be unable to be a powerful user of magecraft without 'official' study.


She sighed, and took shelter under the concrete overhang of a building downtown in the city. She didn't know this place nearly as well as she did Fuyuki, but a basic street map had been enough for her. With the address of Touko's workshop known to her, it was only a matter of getting to the place. While it was a little out of the way, it wasn't somewhere that was particularly hard to reach; it was more a matter of hiding in plain sight. Rin had little doubt that Touko evaded most notice by being in a fairly crowded place that was easy to overlook.


The light of the day was waning, and as the sun fell from its perch in the sky grey clouds gathered as if to replace it, thick and grim. They rolled along the orange-tinted sky, and Rin knew too well that it would start raining soon. The crowds of people were dying down, though, and the illumining of streets lights would be enough for her to make her way about the streets. She wondered if this place had a history of crime or muggings, but didn't let that thought worry her. The more immediate threat was the weather; if it ruined the paper she was holding, then she would be utterly lost in this city. Remembering small things like numbers was never her forte, and she let out a frustrated sigh as she walked along the sidewalk beside a busy downtown road, her shoes clacking against the pavement.


This city didn't use the exact same address system as Fuyuki, throwing Rin off a few times, and she swore that this was at least the second time she had rounded this block. Since she'd taken a train into town instead of driving, there was no hope for her if she got lost here. She already was low on cash, and there was no way that she was going to spend much more than necessary.


Entering a sector of fairly plain looking buildings amidst commercial downtown structures, Rin looked around, trying to find the right address in the waning sunlight. She had at least determined that this was the right street, but which building was the exact one she needed? She wracked her brain for the answer, and only frustrated herself more when she took into account apartment building numbers and the issues that existed there.


Having been walking for hours already, Rin sighed again and leaned against the white stucco wall of some office building, checking the piece of paper that was still clenched tightly in her hand. Breathing in deeply, she noticed the raw smell of cigarette smoke in the air, and looked around sharply to see where it was coming from. There were a few people on the streets, but she couldn't see the characteristic light of a burning cigarette around any one of them.


She shook her head and turned around, wanting to get underneath the cover provided by the slight alcove right in front of the office building's doors before the rain started coming down.


She felt the thud of colliding with another person, knocking her aside. She didn't get a good look at the person she bumped into, but pulled back immediately. It was clear this person wasn't happy with her.


“Damnit. Can you watch where you're going?” The woman said in a harsh tone of voice, sounding like she was letting out some of the day's stress out on the person that had bumped into her out of nowhere. She had striking red hair and wore a long sleeved white shirt; she quickly knelt down to pick up her cigarette that had fallen on the ground, examined it for a moment or two, then threw it back down, a look of disgust on her face.


“Ah! It's a little rude, but can you help me with something?” Asked Rin, getting the attention of this red haired woman. “I'm looking for a person named Touko Aozaki. I was told that she lives somewhere in this city.”


The woman narrowed her eyes at Rin, her expression obvious even in the dim light. “I don't know her.” Her hand was on her hip, and she looked expectantly at Rin as if expecting an apology.


“Then... can you tell me where this address is?” She held up her piece of paper, showing the dark, scrawled numbers on it. It was a crude thing, but it had to do. In times such as these, there was really nothing else she could have done. Asking for directions was something she should have done much earlier, but in the hustle and bustle of the city streets she hadn't thought of it, let alone had time to ask any random person. Though she had an air of confidence about her and her expression was almost always calm and noble, she was embarrassed by just walking up and talking to random strangers in a city she didn't know a thing about. It felt too brash, even for her.


The woman shrugged. “Yeah, if you're looking around here then check the building I just came from. That should be the place... unless I'm wrong.” Her answer was vague and slightly inconclusive, but it was enough for Rin.


Turning around, Rin recalled her manners and said, “Oh, thank you for you help, and I'm sorry about causing any disturbances.” For a moment she became more formal than she meant to be, but in this place that she hardly knew, it felt wrong to give a bad impression to someone who lived here. It was as though one person with a negative view of Rin would make everyone else in the city distrust her entirely.


So, with nothing else to ask of the woman, Rin turned around, walking calmly towards the glass front doors of the tall structure that appeared to be an office building.


However, she felt a sharp tug on the back of her neck as a finger grabbed at her collar, jerking her backwards and almost making her cough from being handled so roughly and unexpectedly. Rin shook her head and looked behind herself, seeing the same red-haired woman standing there, staring at her with a disappointed frown on her face. It was as if she'd expected better of Rin, even though the two didn't know each other at all.


Rin pursed her lips, a quizzical look on her face, not knowing exactly what to do. She was partially annoyed by this seemingly random gesture, how this woman had just rudely pulled her backwards after telling her to go in that building. It didn't look too suspicious to Rin; there were lights inside and what appeared to be a lobby, and it may even have been an apartment of some kind, she wasn't entirely sure. What she was sure of, though, was that there was something entirely unusual about this red-haired woman, something just a little... off.


“You're more oblivious than I expected you to be.” The woman said, lighting up another cigarette. Rin heard the flick of a lighter, and didn't know what to say.


It came to her, then. The pieces lined up, and it only made sense who this could be. Even though she never got a physical description... “You're Touko Aozaki, aren't you?” Rin's tone was almost accusatory.


She laughed, and let out a puff of smoke. “Heh, none other. I guess my barrier's more effective than I thought it was, to effect even a magus like you.” Touko shook her head, becoming serious once again. “But more importantly, I have to ask this: what the hell are you doing here? Look, even if you aren't some magus sent after me, we can't talk here. I have to ask you a few questions first.”


Nodding, Rin prepared herself for anything she could be asked. That she had been tricked by Touko was embarrassing and almost even made her legitimately angry, but it was also sobering. There were magi out in the world who, although they may not have had the sheer talent of Rin, were highly experienced, like Touko herself. Rin could only be glad that this one hadn't been too hostile, or she would have ended up in a situation more dire than what she had been aiming for.


“Alright.” Touko was finished with her cigarette, and tossed it down a gutter by the curb. Looking back up at Rin she said, “What do you want from me? I was heading out for some personal business, but if you're urgent enough and you pay me well enough I might be a little more lenient with my schedule, alright?”


“I understand. I need two things from you. The first is-” Rin was cut off by a wave of Touko's hand just as she began her explanation.


The woman narrowed her eyes again. “You're the Tohsaka head, aren't you? From Fuyuki, or around there?” She sounded suspicious, and Rin knew exactly why.


“Yes, I am Rin Tohsaka, overseer of the Tohsaka land claims. However, my business with you today has nothing to do with that, and nothing to do with the Mage's Association. However, I do have something that I'm wondering about more, now: how do you know me?”


Touko laughed again, a wry smile on her face. “I know every magus north, east, south and west of of here. Whether they know me is for them to figure out.”


“Then, back to the question.” Rin cleared her throat. It wasn't much she had to ask for, but it was dangerous. She began walking farther inside the concrete alcove, with Touko following her to a fairly dark, out of the way corner where no one would be able to hear them without great difficulty. “A friend of mine, in Fuyuki, needs a puppet body made for him. The current body he has is... flawed, and is breaking down, so we need something that's meant for actual regular use.”


“A full-body operation, huh? That's dangerous, you know. If anyone finds out about this, they're going to be in serious trouble, and all of this is going to get traced back to me. First off, this guy is a magus, right?”


Rin nodded.


“Good. But, still...” Touko sighed, and shook her head lightly. “We'll talk about payment later. Now, what's the second thing you want from me?”


For Rin, this was a stranger, somewhat embarrassing thing to ask. Never before had she done this, had she asked for the whereabouts of a specific person, or their own problems. It reminded her, in a way, of her own sister, and how she'd been unable to bring herself to try to save her until it was almost too late. She could only hope that the girl she was looking for now was normal, but given the world she lived in, that seemed all too unlikely.


“I'm looking for a girl.” Rin glanced to the side, silently chastising herself on speaking in such a boring manner. If she wanted to get Touko's interest, she'd have to make this interesting to her. “I understand that you run a detective agency of sorts, somewhere in this city. Now, I'm pretty sure that a normal missing persons case wouldn't spark your interest, but I think this girl is different. I met her five years ago, and since then I've having dreams about her, dressed in a kimono and covered in blood, standing on the side of the road.” Rin almost felt like an insane person, rambling about a dream she had that may not have even been important to anyone but her. Still regardless of how ridiculous it likely sounded to whoever she told, it was something she held in her heart, and she wouldn't let it go, not now.


And, it was true that any regular person would probably dismiss Rin's dreams and idea as strange and out of place. But, just as strange things would invariably attract other strange things, fate had a way of piecing itself together. And so, in this case, fate was working silently in Rin's favour, for perhaps the first time in her life.


“Girl in a kimono, five years ago...” Touko placed a finger on her chin, looking thoughtful. “Do you know her name, or is this just some image in your head, with a face but not a name?”


“Her name was...” Rin had trouble recalling it, at first, but as soon as she thought of the cool summer breeze that had washed over her that one day in the park, her memories all snapped back into place. “Shiki. Her name was Shiki, but... I don't know anything else.”


With a violent motion, Touko grabbed hold of Rin's forearm, starting to drag her away. Rin wasn't sure if this woman was serious, angry, or just being ridiculous, but it seemed to be getting her somewhere, at least.


Touko shook her head, grumbling in a low voice about something. “The second question I was going to ask you was about a favour you could do for me, to help pay for your friend's puppet. It seems that question won't be necessary, now.”


“Wait... you know this girl, then?”


With a sigh, Touko nodded. “Yes. Her name is Shiki Ryougi, and she's an old acquaintance of mine. Five years ago, she...” Touko suddenly stopped talking, and ran a hand through her red hair, as if to clear her thoughts. “No, I'll tell you later. For now, just follow me. Shiki's apartment is just along this way, and she might be interested in seeing you. Who knows. She's rarely interested in anything these days, which is a pity. She was a good help, long ago.” Again Touko sighed, recalling some old memories that perhaps she would rather keep buried away, rather than bringing them to the surface, even if they were pertinent to the current situation.


At this news, however, Rin was both elated and confused. The fact that Touko was a friend of the girl in the kimono from Rin's dreams was so incredible that it made her head feel light, and made her wonder if any of this was really happening, or if it was just one long dream. Given how vivid some of the ones she had experienced in the past were, she didn't doubt the possibility. Still, in a way it felt almost suspicious that Touko was so close to Shiki, that girl. If this was a trick of some kind, or just a cruel imagining... Rin threw away that thought, not wanting to believe that this was all some lie that she was living. She couldn't be getting so close to solving that mystery from five years ago only for it to be revealed to be false.


In time, walking through the dark city streets, through alleyways and side paths that only someone incredibly familiar with this city could have known, Rin was brought to an apartment block, looking ordinary and plain. The colours couldn't be made out in the dim light; it just looked like various whites and blacks from the outside, with exterior lamps shading the white walls a pale yellow-orange with their illumination.


“This is it.” Touko pointed up at the apartment, and a small pair of glass doors that led inside. It was a fairly modern looking building, probably built around here in the last decade at most, and Rin recalled seeing similar development projects in and around Fuyuki. For a traditional-looking girl like Shiki, wearing a kimono and with her hair plain and unadorned, this place looked like a strange sort of residence. A typical Japanese mansion like the one her friend back home lived in felt like it would suit Shiki better, but Rin wasn't going to complain. So long as she was brought to a conclusion in this living dream, she would be happy.


“Ah, wait a moment there, Tohsaka.” Touko gestured for Rin to stay in place for a moment, under an overhand beside a simple garden. The clouds above were rumbling, and sooner rather than later there would be rain falling from the sky. “I just have to talk to Shiki for a second; I haven't seen her in a while, and I'll let her know that you're coming in. Just give me... five minutes, alright?” Touko didn't even wait for Rin's acceptance of any kind, just starting off at a surprisingly quick pace past the glass doors, turning a corner and going up some stairs within.


Rin sighed, thinking that this all was at once confusing and hard to deal with, but in the end there was nothing that could prevent her from continuing on her path. In fact, she didn't even want to wait the long, excruciating five minutes, nearly shaking on her feet, so she located a nearby telephone booth. It was only polite to call up the other person she had come to this city for, so she stepped into the booth, picking up the phone.


She fumbled with her other hand, looking for the right coin. There was something like that in her skirt pocket, or perhaps her jacket, she remembered, since she'd brought with her some money just in case this exact incident happened. She was never good with phones or any equipment of that sort, but she thought she could at least get this to work. The coin fell out of her fingers a few times as she tried to fit it into the strangely small slot, but she eventually managed it.


“Hm... don't I have to call an operator, or a special number?” Rin wondered to herself, having not used one of these things in a long while. Even home phones were strange for her, but since she had been travelling more often lately she had at least become used to telephone booths and their strange mechanisms.


Eventually Rin just tossed her hands in the air, giving up, and dialled the phone number as best as she could remember it. It was easy for her to get those mixed up, but when she heard a dull dial tone she believed she'd done the right thing and not messed up as usual.


A voice came from the other end of the line. “Hello? This is the Emiya residence.” The man who answered sounded a little groggy, but not at all annoyed at being called at a fairly late hour.


“It's me. I've met the magus that can help us with your body, and she's just getting something right now, so it shouldn't be too long.”


“Oh? Well, that's good, Tohsaka. Sakura's been doing all of the cooking lately since with my body I can't handle too much of that, but otherwise it's been pretty good here.”


“Ah.” Rin paused for a while before speaking again. “Is she doing well?”


“Of course.” Somehow, Rin could tell that Shirou, speaking into the phone, had a warm smile on his face. “Rider's been taking good care of her, and she's been doing well at her job. She seems to like it a lot, and it's good income for the two of us while I'm unable to do any real labour.”


“That's... that's good.” Despite her genuine happiness, Rin couldn't help but feel a little guilt towards her sister, biting her lip as she thought of things best unsaid. “Well, actually, I have one other thing to do while I'm here. I have a... friend, to visit. It shouldn't take long.”


“Huh. I didn't know you had friends, Tohsaka.”


Rin almost slammed the phone back on its black metal receiver. “Emiya, you idiot! Just because I don't go out often doesn't mean I don't know anyone. I happen to know someone here, is all. Don't worry about me.”


“Haha, that's good to hear, Tohsaka. I hope it goes well for you, and... Sakura and I both thank you a lot for doing this for us. It means a lot, you know.” Rin heard a sigh from the other end of the line. “I know you don't like to admit this, Tohsaka, but you have to know that you're more compassionate than you let yourself think. Don't hold yourself back, okay? If you like helping people, then you should find someone that needs your help. I used to think that I could do that for everyone, but... it's better just to find one person that means a lot to you. I'm not sure if this friend of yours is anything like that, but be sure to care about her no less than you care about Sakura and I, alright? I hope it goes well, Tohsaka.”


Shirou's outburst, if you could call it that, was strange, but in this situation perhaps a little warranted. Rin knew that he was someone who had changed a lot over the past months, and in a way Rin envied that. There was nothing that she had that she cared about, in the same sort of way that Shirou cared about Sakura. Rin had nothing so dear to her, and perhaps that was why she put so much focus on finding the girl from her dreams. She had to wonder, herself, if her real reason for coming to this city was to find a reason for doing anything. There was a chance, as far as she knew, that the girl named Shiki could give that to her. No matter how strange this strangely named girl ended up... Rin would try her best to make herself an important part of her life, get to know her, and find a real reason behind her dreams, and the memories from five years ago.


“...thanks, Emiya.” Rin mumbled. “Goodbye, and have a good night.”


“Heh. Good night, Tohsaka.” Rin heard Shirou click down his telephone, ending the call, and she did the same, standing alone for a while in the telephone booth, wondering about what she was going to be doing over the next few days.


With no other sounds to interrupt it, the patter of the rain could be heard clearly on the outside of the close telephone booth, endless and firm. It reminded Rin of the sounds the rain made on the glass of the car she rode in years ago, when she saw the kimono-clad girl, with the bloody streak up her clothes. She never really remembered her expression, that thought came to her. The girl's expression was a blank in her memory, and no matter how hard Rin tried, she couldn't recall what she had seen, in the past or in her dreams. Perhaps it was a blank, then, and the girl wore no expression at all, just staring vaguely ahead at nothing at all, as if there was no real future ahead of her, and no past to look back to. That was the expression of someone who had no direction in life, and that thought only made Rin even more determined to meet Shiki, and to understand her.


The thuds sounded on the side of the booth, startling Rin out of her trance-like state, making her nearly jump as she turned around to see Touko staring at her, eyebrow raised, mouth moving to speak barely audible words.


Rin opened up the door, getting a few splashes of rain on her uncovered hand.


“Jeez, girl. I said you had to wait about five minutes, not fifteen. If it fits with your schedule, could you be a little faster next time? You really seem to have a problem with being aware of things, or so it seems.” Touko sighed, sliding an errant few locks of red hair back behind her ear. She had a black-topped umbrella, mostly protecting her from the rain falling down upon them both, and she looked impatient, waiting for Rin to hurry up.


They ran up to the front doors of the apartment, stepping up a short set of stairs; Touko closed her umbrella as she and Rin slipped inside to the warm apartment atmosphere, the last traces of cold wetness scattering almost as soon as they closed the door behind them.


There was a certain musty kind of smell to the apartment, as if it didn't get much air in it, marking it as a relatively low-class sort of place. Rin's lips curled into a frown as she noted this, and she didn't like it, since it clashed so much with her previous experiences of spacious homes with many windows that let in fresh air year-round. This place, being so much different, made Rin wonder about the living conditions that Shiki put herself in. For a moment, as she ascended the grey carpeted stairs following Touko, she felt like some kind of psychiatrist or social worker coming to help this girl – she shook that idea from her head, not wanting to see herself in that sort of way. Maybe she was doing this mostly out of personal interest, but at the same time it wasn't at all professional. This was something done in her so-called 'free time.'


Touko took in a deep breath and rapped on a wooden door with her fist, lightly. She and Rin were in a long hallway, lighted only by dim fluorescent lights along the ceiling. It was dreary, Rin could tell that much, and she waited patiently for the door to open.


“Here we are, Tohsaka.” Touko opened the door a few seconds after knocking, and gestured for Rin to enter first. She followed shortly afterwards, treating this as no different than any other day she came to visit Shiki in her lonesome apartment.


To say that the single-room apartment building was bare would be a severe understatement. Of all the things in the room, Rin could see a plain mattress with a single, white sheet covering it, a mini-fridge hidden away in one corner, and a standing mechanical fan in front of a half-open closet. There were a few kimonos in the closet, but nothing else. The only other thing in the space was a bathroom, probably consisting only of a shower, toilet and sink, and little else at all.


Regardless of all of that, though, this room had within it exactly what Rin was looking for: Shiki Ryougi, laying on her stomach on the bed, her straight brown hair, cut fairly short, sprawling against the sheet. Her eyes were dull and had a kind of glassy look to them, and though the gentle curves of her face were elegant and beautiful, suggesting somewhat noble birth, Shiki was dressed in a plain kimono and wore no makeup at all. Her eyes stared ever forward, flicking upward like a cat's eyes when Rin entered the room, then returned to continue gazing at some spot on the wall.


“She doesn't go out often.” Whispered Touko in Rin's ear, and Shiki pouted at that. There was no use trying to hide any conversation from her; she could easily hear even Touko's soft whispers to Rin.


Nodding, Rin gently brushed Touko aside, and stepped hesitantly forward towards Shiki. The girl in the kimono didn't bother to sit up, just laying as she was, her eyes following Rin as she moved closer and closer to the bed. Rin turned and sat beside Shiki on the bed, folding her hands primly in her lap, looking down at the strange, placid girl who didn't seem to be reacting strongly to anything around her. Eventually her eyes, having examined Rin up and down, turned back to gaze ahead at nothing in particular.


“Who're you? Some friend of Touko, I guess?” Her voice was rough and boyish, but Rin smiled at it as she recalled that one day in her youth when the older girl in the kimono came up to her, chastising her for being so reckless and sleeping in a bad place.


Rin shook her head. “No, I just met her today.” She hadn't caught Shiki's eyes again, but continued to talk, all the while wondering just what to say to her. “Well, I... I'm not sure if you remember me, but we met when I was much younger. Five years ago, to be exact.” Patiently, she sat and waited for a response, not wanting to be too rough with this girl. No matter how tough and uncaring Shiki seemed, Rin believed that she had feelings just like any other person, and felt a sense of some kind of trauma coming from her. She could tell that just by being near her and hearing her speak and make minute little adjustments to her posture on the bed.


“Well, I don't remember.” Shiki's words were callous, but true, and they struck Rin a little in her chest. “You must've been a kid then, so you're probably remembering wrong, or something. Don't worry about it too much. It's stupid to worry about things like that.”


With a bitter smile, Rin glanced over at Touko, who was leaned against the door, silently watching the conversation between Rin and Shiki, and how it didn't progress at all.


“No, I'm sure it was you.” Assured Rin, placing her hands on either side of her, grabbing at the bedsheets lightly. “I've been having dreams ever since then, of a girl in a kimono just like yours. She had straight, brown hair, a blank look on her face, no emotion in her eyes, and a streak of blood all the way down her clothes. She stood barefoot in the rain, getting soaked, and no matter how much I tried to reach out to her, I could never touch her, even after having the dream dozens of times. It's strange, but I know that that was you in the dream, and no one else.”


“Whatever.” Shiki shrugged her shoulders as best she could while laying on her stomach, effectively dismissing Rin.


The girl frowned, and absentmindedly drew a hand through her hair, playing with one of her long brown twintails, bringing it behind her shoulder and sighing. Once more she checked the room over, seeing nothing but a few plastic water bottles on top of the mini-fridge. She wondered for a moment and looked back at Shiki, but what with the girl's loose, flowing kimono, she couldn't tell if Shiki was especially thin or not. Her skin was pale, though, and that was enough to tell Rin that something was really wrong here. Now that she'd seen the predicament that this girl was in, there was no way that she could just let her go. She'd done that once - ignoring someone in need, leaving them alone – and it didn't work at all. If she would do anything, now, it would be to spare this girl any more sorrow and depression. At the very least, it would ease her own conscience.


Rin sat up sharply from the bed, glancing down at Shiki and giving a small sigh as she did so. Meeting this girl, finally, only made her want to help her more and learn more about her, to get her out of this situation. In a way, it was looking at a lost, wet cat on the side of the road, with nowhere to go home to. Rin, far more empathetic than she had been just months ago, knew that the only option she had would be to stay here and help this girl.


“I'll be going, then.” She gave a generic goodbye to Shiki, who responded with a small nod and a mumble of “Mmm-hmmm.” They said nothing else to each other, because there really wasn't anything for them to talk about.


Before the silence got awkward, Rin quickly stepped out of the room, gently closing the door behind herself, and let out a deep, held-in breath as she turned to Touko. She hung her head, disappointed with herself in a way, but at the same time empowered.


“So, how is she in comparison to that dream girl of yours?” Asked Touko in a sarcastic tone of voice, her arms crossed. She fidgeted with a cigarette in her hand again, rolling it between her fingers, not paying it any real attention.


Rin looked up at Touko, her frown showing her emotions clearly. “This isn't what I was expecting, but... it makes sense, for a girl like this. Has she always been like this?”


“No, I'm afraid not.” Touko shook her head, remembering something, then she sharply raised her head, snapping her fingers, breaking the cigarette she was holding. “Wait, come to think of it, you said that you first saw her five years ago, right? Not four, not six? Five, exactly?”


“Well, yes.” Rin answered, wondering what the fuss was about. She suspected it had to do with that one night, with Shiki alone in the rain. “You're wondering if... if I saw something?”


Not saying anything, Touko nodded and led Rin back down to the lobby, a good distance away from Shiki's apartment room. There, no one would be eavesdropping on them, since by this time everyone was at home, and no one would be walking the lonely halls of the apartment complex. Touko leaned against a white plaster wall, and began speaking again.


“You're probably thinking of something like this, too, but I'll just say it here: five years ago, Shiki was in an accident. A car accident, not far from the city. She was found with blood all over her, and with a slash wound in her neck, just short of an artery. It was believed that she tried to kill herself, failed to go through with it, and then had a car do the rest. It was really a miracle that she survived; her body was messed up and she was committed to a hospital for almost a year recovering. I visited her in that time, having not been at the site of the accident.”


Rin knitted her eyebrows, trying to make sense of this. “Why would she want to kill herself? She doesn't seem like a particularly depressed girl, or at least she didn't when I first met her, five years ago. She was almost pleasant, really.”


Touko let out a long and solemn sigh. “That's part of the problem, you could say. Before the accident, she had multiple personalities, of a supernatural rather than medical nature. Somehow, instead of actually dying, the damage to her body caused one of those personalities to 'die' and since then, she's never been the same. In a way, it's trauma that she not only can't express, it's trauma she doesn't even understand. For her, in this lethargic state, she's never really known anything else. While she was a good worker before the accident, afterwards she hasn't been the same. Her other personality, the rough and isolated one, has become dominant, and unlike one of her primary personalities before her brush with death, this one isn't at all social. While she could be rough at times before, she was active, kind, and even energetic, in a way.”


Pausing, not knowing what to say, Touko breathed a few times, and then frowned. “I don't think she's smiled a single time in the last five years. From her, this is something completely unusual. It's not that she's depressed, it's more like... like there's nothing there at all. As if she doesn't have a human heart anymore, you could say.”


“A heart, huh?” Rin said those words softly, turning them over in her mind, wondering about them. To her, the idea of being completely emotionless was terrifying. Once, she had tried to kill her emotions in order to deal with the problems she faced, but that crumbled away. This situation, though, with Shiki... it was something completely different, she could tell that much. Being unable to truly feel emotion would be, for a person, the worst possible torture. Even being constantly depressed would be better than feeling nothing, as even with depression there's still emotion left. Shiki's problem was that indifference was the only thing she knew.


It was clear to Touko, then, that her unexpected visitor wasn't going to leave any time soon. At that she cracked a light smile, being glad that there was someone other than herself to watch over Shiki. And, if there was even the slightest possibility, she wanted Shiki to be able to feel again, like a normal person. With Rin, that stood a chance of happening, and for that Touko was grateful.


“Look, I'll make you a deal.” Said Touko, a serious expression on her face as she walked with Rin along the city streets, her umbrella covering them both. “I'll let you stay in my workshop for a while, all expenses paid, and I'll help you with your puppet, if you help out Shiki. She needs someone like you, Tohsaka.”


“A favour for a favour... this sounds like a good exchange.” Rin nodded, and then had a wry smile on her face. “But, isn't it dangerous to let another magus into your workshop? After all, I could get rid of the barrier that prevents most people from entering without you even noticing a single difference. You're taking a risk.”


Touko laughed, and patted Rin on the shoulder. “If you do that, then I'll have you pay me in some of those famous Tohsaka jewels.” Her expression was wicked, and it was clear to Rin that she definitely had the upper hand in this discussion. Normally Rin would despise that kind of inferiority, but at the moment it didn't matter to her. She was doing this for Shiki.


So, the first day ended, and Rin had created a goal for herself: she would, regardless of the consequences, save Shiki Ryougi from the dull life that she was living, and get her to appreciate the beauty and vibrance of all that around her.

-----------------------------

[Five_X]

-------------------------------

“Ah, it's hot!” Rin kissed her thumb after burning it on the side of the bowl. She had draped some plastic wrap overtop of it to seal it for carrying, and put it in a small bag.



It was morning already, and Rin had gotten a good night's rest, despite how long she had been outside in the city streets, and despite the events of the day before. She wondered if she would ever get to sleep that night, tossing and turning in her bed in the makeshift guest room of Touko's hidden workshop in the office building where she had first met the woman. Thoughts of Shiki filled her mind, never leaving, and only when fatigue was completely overwhelming her did she fall sleep, waking up about two hours before noon.


Touko wasn't anywhere to be seen, and had left a note on the round table in her kitchen explaining that she was away on business. Rin looked over that, and examined the cluttered kitchen, organizing a few things but making sure not to move much, understanding and respecting the privacy and state of a magus' workshop, even if it was terribly disorganized. Perhaps this poorly cleaned up kitchen helped Touko channel her magecraft in some way; Rin didn't know. All she really was wanting to know was where the cooking ingredients and spices were, eventually finding them in the fridge and some cupboards.


Rin had plans for today to visit Shiki again, so she decided that it would be polite to cook some food for her. She worried about the girl's eating habits, and since she knew that she would be reluctant to go outside to a restaurant, she decided that it would be best to just go to Shiki's apartment and eat with her there. The main thing that she had to do now was to get Shiki to enjoy her company, and see her as a friend. Only then could she be helped in any real way. From her own experiences, Rin knew that only people who were emotionally close to each other could really change each other for the better, and of course that was exactly what Rin wanted to do here.


She gently placed the first bowl of Chinese-style noodles in the plastic supermarket bag, holding it from underneath with a paper towel in between the hot ceramic surface of the bowl and her fingers, so she wouldn't get burned again. She did the exact same with another bow, meant for her, and put two pairs of chopsticks in the bag as well.


Rin draped her light purse over her shoulder and carried the plastic bag of food with two hands, with one holding the straps and the other steadying the cargo from underneath. The walk Shiki's apartment wasn't far, since apparently Touko had made sure that Shiki ended up with that specific place to make it easier to reach her regardless of weather. It was close enough to walk to, and in fact taking a car would probably make the trip longer, since on foot Rin could just take a path that went behind the building that Touko's workshop was in, getting to the back of the apartment building with ease. She walked around to the front, and was at the glass front doors again.


Today, the weather had cleared up a little. The most Rin faced was a light shower here and there, as well as puddles along the roadside, but otherwise nothing too bad, It would probably start raining more heavily again later in the week, but Rin remembered that Touko had an umbrella she could borrow.


The cool, flowing breeze felt good on her skin, and it wasn't too chilling through her red jacket, though even with her thigh-high socks she had to shiver a bit. Still, for the season the weather wasn't necessarily bad, and with the sun peeking through lightening cloud cover, it felt like a good day to be outside. Rin smiled, and was almost reluctant in stepping inside the stagnant apartment building, plain and unchanging. It made her want to help Shiki even more, so that she could come outside and see the beauty of the city skyline in the distance, and feel the sun's warm rays on her pale cheeks. It would do her good, just to experience that again.


Balancing her plastic bag awkwardly, Rin decided to just put it standing up on the carpet in front of Shiki's apartment door. She opened the door, letting it swing freely and bump against a plastic nub built into the wall to prevent any damage to the wall itself from the door being slammed open or anything like that.


As before, Shiki was on her bed, except this time she was facing the opposite direction, near the top of her bed and apparently trying to feel the blowing of the mechanical fan on her face as it cycled back and forth. That alone seemed to be enough to entrance and entertain her, though she still had a bored half-frown on her face.


“Hello? It's Tohsaka, again.” Said Rin, leaning her bag against the wall and bowing slightly. She saw Shiki's bare feet and lower legs swinging back and forth in a rhythm as she continued to look at the fan, no more or less bored with it than anything else. It was just something to look at, and ultimately it was fruitless to care too much about. Rin had to wonder what Shiki was really thinking, and picked her bag up again.


“I brought food for you, if you'd like.” She said as she placed one bowl at the foot of Shiki's bed, right on the carpet. There were no plates, but just keeping it like that would probably be fine. If there was a spill, then she could take care of it.


Shiki shrugged, as usual. “I won't like it.”


Rin pouted, crossing her arms. To her, this almost felt like dealing with a child, and she got a little angry for a moment. “Hey! You could at least be nice and try it, you know.” Her frustration simmered, and with a few breaths she calmed herself, taking the plastic cover off of Shiki's bowl, and taking out her own. With both bowls uncovered, the gentle smell of food filled the room, replacing the cold, fresh nature scent of the air wafting in from Shiki's open window.


With a groan, Shiki rolled over onto her back, and sat up to face Rin. She was like a cat in that way, not speaking often, being lazy and not willing to cooperate. As soon as Rin made that comparison, she have to forgive Shiki, even smiling a little at the silly idea.


Half-crawling, Shiki made her way to the foot of her bed, moving in a way that made it look like she was trying to expend the least amount of energy humanly possible doing so. She tossed her hair about with a shake of her head, getting it out of the way of her eyes, and she stared down at the bowl on the floor. Again like a cat, her nose twitched a few times, taking in the scent of the noodles. They were still radiating heat even with the distance Rin had brought them, and Shiki took some interest in it, pursing her lips as she stared into the liquid around the noodles to see her reflection.


Rin tossed her a pair of chopsticks, already out of their little plastic wrapping, and to Rin's surprise, Shiki caught the wooden utensils with a rapid movement of her hand, as if she'd been waiting for that one moment this entire time. Rin tilted her head, more interested in watching Shiki eat and pick at the noodles than eat her own. Sitting cross-legged, she absentmindedly dipped the tips of her chopsticks into her noodles, wrapping the food around them, cutting the noodles off at a good point, and bringing them into her mouth. Her movements were smooth and elegant, as to be expected of a girl raised into a noble family such as the Tohsakas.


However, Shiki seemed content with just staring at her food, chopsticks in her hand, ready to eat. Even though she was completely prepared to dig into the bowl presented to her, she didn't do so at all. Rin wondered about that, and suddenly noticed that Shiki's face had sort of scrunched up, and she wasn't looking at all like normal.


Acting quickly, Rin slipped the paper towel out from underneath her bowl and brought it right up to Shiki's nose holding it there. She placed her other hand on the back of the girl's brown hair, and made a note: even though Shiki didn't seem like the girl who took much care of herself, her hair was smooth and silky, clearly having been washed recently even though it was definitely frizzy in a few spots. There was the smell of some refreshing fragrance on her hair, and Rin had to ponder that. Clearly Shiki couldn't be doing absolutely nothing all day, but what did she do in that other time? It wasn't as though Rin could set up a camera, but she still had to wonder...


“Ah...” Shiki seemed to be taking in a breath. “Uff!” There was a cute, small noise as Shiki sneezed into the paper towel, and Rin patted her on the head, tossing the piece of paper into a grey garbage bin nearby.


Shiki wore a frown on her face. “This is why I hate spicy foods. Always make me sneeze.”


“Well, Ryougi, I don't think that's exactly the case.” Rin pointed towards the open window, from which a chill draft was wafting in. “You probably have a cold, actually. Come on, eat this. It'll make you better. It's not really spicy; it's just hot.”


The girl in the kimono scoffed. “I hate hot food too, but.. eh, if you want me to eat it so badly, then I'll eat it. Just stop hovering over me, alright?”


Smiling, Rin nodded and returned to her own bowl of noodles, which had gradually started to cool. She ate it up quickly, both because she wanted to eat it all before it got too cold, and because she wanted to spend more time looking at Shiki, whose expression was hard to read for Rin. It looked like she was bored, as usual, but there was a certain... light, to her eyes, that Rin hadn't seen in a while. It was strange, but somehow comforting.


So, she looked on as Shiki carefully ate her noodles, sometimes slurping them into her mouth, but eating them nonetheless. At times it looked as though she was trying her best to avoid getting the food on her skin, or just trying to avoid touching the noodles or the bowl entirely except with her chopsticks. Rin could actually tell a lot about her just from the way she ate, and noted that while Shiki was at times reckless, she did try to eat her food carefully and with a hint of elegance or just proper manners, unconsciously. Rin wondered when this became a character study, but for her, it was all about watching Shiki and how she dealt with the noodles. Perhaps... perhaps this was how Shiki viewed the world, as if she was waiting for some kind of response from it, observing it constantly for changes, something to spark her interest, if she had any.


“Hey, can you stop staring at me like that?” Shiki grumbled as she swallowed down a set of noodles. “If you want me to enjoy this, then stop distracting me.”


Rin chuckled. “Mmm, and you're one to talk about that, huh?” She winked at Shiki, a playful gesture.


The girl shrugged, her expression unchanging. “True enough.” With that she returned to eating, not feeling any differently, a total contrast to Rin.


In a way, Rin was excited, though she didn't dare show it on the outside. It was small interactions such as this that would help her friendship with Shiki along. If she could keep this up, then of course she would be successful. She'd cure Shiki of her hikkikomori ways! Wait, Rin though, she was mixing herself up with someone else. Her duty, as she put it, was to make Shiki enjoy life again. Though today was hardly a shining example of what could be done for Shiki, and perhaps a vision as to how successful Rin hypothetically could be.


When Shiki was done eating the noodles, the two girls drank the leftover, lukewarm liquid together, and Rin put Shiki's bowl in her own, putting them back in the bag. For some reason, Shiki wanted to keep the chopsticks that she used, and Rin just shrugged at that. Perhaps she wanted a memento or something, or she could just be curious about the little sticks of wood as they were, as she was curious in her blank, unemotional way about everything.


“So, Ryougi...” Rin began, trying to start a conversation. “If you don't like these kinds of foods, then what do you usually eat around here?”


Shiki's eyes flicked up and glanced at Rin, their gazes meeting for just a fleeting moment. “Just call me 'Shiki,' alright? Being all formal is stupid when you're just talking with someone like this.” She tilted her head lazily to the side, now staring at something else in the room. “Oh, and those noodles were okay, I guess. You must cook well or something, I dunno.”


Smiling even this simple back and forth chatter, Rin glanced over at the mini-fridge, wondering what was inside. “I'm glad you liked it, er... Shiki.” She pursed her lips, unused to being so close to someone so early, but at the same time... it did fit what she was trying to get at; either that, or Shiki was just a casual sort of person, which seemed much more than likely.


“I don't usually eat much.” Shiki said, rolling a bit side to side on her bed. “Usually just drink water and some stuff Touko brings me. Nothing important.”


Rin's face almost went completely pale at that. A girl who subsists on water bottles? That seemed so improbable that it could just be some kind of dark joke. Given Shiki's apparent attitude most of the time, Rin didn't doubt that she could crack a very dry joke every so often, fi she even understood humour. All alone here, she probably didn't even get to watch television or anything. What kind of life did she live? How did she live it? Rin, who was inept with technology but still managed to be in contact with the world as a whole, couldn't understand being so isolated, alone in this room for so long. Yet, that was the life that Shiki lived, so she would have to grow to understand it in order to understand Shiki herself. Rin was no psychologist, but she knew that a person's circumstances could often be a factor that led to the development of their overall personality or their attitude. Shiki, who lived alone in a bland apartment room, couldn't have had much positive development in that regard. Rin understood that the girl probably didn't have any friends, either, other than Touko. It was a sad life to live for her, and Rin frowned.


“Hey, Shiki... do you want to go out tomorrow?”


The girl in the kimono shook her head.


“Oh, okay.” Rin hung her head slightly, and stood up from her cross-legged sitting position. She had no more reason to stay here, and just sticking around would probably bother Shiki if she even cared, so it was best for her to just leave now, and come back the next day. A surprising amount of time had passed, actually, and Touko was probably around in her workshop at this time.


Rin waved goodbye, and in response Shiki just raised her hand and mumbled something, which was muffled by the pillow she was resting on.


Closing the wooden door to Shiki's apartment, Rin silently left, walking down the hallway she had come from, and descending the stairs. She was calm, but inside she was incredibly happy, glad to have elicited a response of any kind of Shiki, who had seemed so cold and lonely before, not showing any emotion. Now, at least, ti seemed in a way that Shiki was holding something back, or hiding something important from everyone, especially herself.



Leaving the building, Rin checked the sky, seeing clouds gathering again, blocking the sun's gentle rays and giving the city a dark, grey atmosphere. It wasn't pleasant, but Rin could at least hold onto the hope that Shiki had given her, and so she made her way back to Touko's workshop.

---------------------------

[Five_X]

--------------------------

“How did it go?” Asked Touko as Rin slipped off her shoes, entering the workshop. Dolls and papers were scattered everywhere, as usual, and it seemed like Touko only had arrived here fairly recently. She was leaning back in her office chair, at her desk and smoking a cigarette; she adjusted her glasses with one finger, and looked over at Rin.



The girl shrugged. “I think it went well. She ate the Chinese noodles I made for her, and we talked a little bit. Other than that, nothing.”


Touko gave her a warm smile, and invited her to come closer. “You're doing good work, you know. There are a lot of people in the world that wouldn't put so much effort out for a girl like Shiki who seems completely like a lost cause.”


“I'm not really that great, to be honest.” Said Rin as she put down the bagged bowls in the kitchen and walked back over to Touko.


She saw a few papers on Touko's desk, and saw that she had a briefcase leaned against her chair, as if she needed to be ready to grab it at any time whenever she would be needed. If anything, she definitely gave off the vibes of a hard worker, even if she seemed casual in her free time, and especially when she was with Shiki. The two were at the same time very similar, and very different. It was enough to make Rin wonder about how the two had met, long ago, but she decided to pass on asking that question. Instead, there was something more important that she needed to know, or at least something that grasped her interest more immediately.


“Say, what were you investigating?” She asked, a finger placed thoughtfully on her chin, examining the room around her. “That is, if you were investigating anything at all.”


Touko shrugged, as if the subject matter she was dealing with was just nothing to her. “There've been some murders around the city, lately. It might seem mundane at first, but I checked out some of the crime scenes, and... well, it's unusual enough for me to take an interest. Usually I only do supernatural cases and leave the other stuff to the police, but something tells me they aren't going to get this one for a while.”


“What's so unusual about it, then?” Rin was honestly wondering, even though the topic was grisly. If the streets were getting dangerous, then she'd have to make sure that Shiki keeps safe in her apartment, and doesn't walk away in the middle of the night.


“Well, hold on to your lunch for this one:” Touko crushed her cigarette in an ashtray, and blew the smoke towards the front doorway. “A few bodies, just one each night, have been found around the city, all in different locations, all unmoved. It's clear that they are all related, however, since they all have completely straight cut wounds. Nothing jagged, nothing imprecise. These people were all killed in incredibly pinpoint sorts of ways but a knife or other cutting tool. Typically their necks will be slashed, and if that doesn't kill them, their arms will be broken, and a couple have even been dissected, their entrails cut open while they were running away from their killer.”


Rin's face went a straight pale, and she looked away. This was a horrific string of events to happen in a city like this, and she knew that in Fuyuki, there would be nothing like that. Nothing, of course, except the Grail War, and even that hadn't been so bloody on a daily basis. It was violent, certainly, but never was it so seemingly random. As it was the Holy Grail War, nearly everyone expected to kill each other, as that was part of the point of the war. However, this was everyday life. Violent murders and sick accidents weren't supposed to happen like this, in a city like this.


She didn't want to believe it, but this place was more dangerous than she had at first believed. Certainly that was to be expected from a larger city, as this place was bigger than rural Fuyuki by far, but at the same time murder wasn't something to expect on a regular basis. Even the largest and most crime-infested cities only reported a general maximum of a couple dozen or so murder deaths per year. Several in a row in this city was far more than a simple coincidence.


“How... how has this investigation been progressing, then?” Rin was almost afraid to ask, but then again it couldn't hurt. Touko wouldn't go into the less pleasant details... would she?


“It hasn't been going well at all.” Touko sighed, placing her fingers lightly on her forehead as if she had a headache of some kind. “I might be crazy some of the time, but I like living, so I haven't been able to really do any serious, firsthand investigation. All I can do is look at what's already happened, even when there's almost no evidence at the scenes in question. The only real thing I can do is wait until the killer slips up and leaves something behind that'll give me a strong lead... otherwise, I'm dead in the water, with nowhere to go.”


Rin crossed her arms. “Do you have any suspects?”


“None at all.”


There was nothing really left to talk about. Rin could tell that Touko was very much stressed by this failure of an investigation, and so she left for her room, thinking up ways to entertain Shiki or get her interest in some way. She couldn't really think of anything before she slept, and so she just laid there in her bed, trying her best to avoid thinking too hard, so that her sleep wouldn't be interrupted or wracked with uneasy dreams.


---------------------------

[Five_X]

----------------------------

Rin Tohsaka awoke the next morning from uneasy dreams only to realize that she had a brilliant idea for her current project to help with Shiki's problems. No matter what their origin may have been, she believed that this kind of plan would be infallible.



To be specific, she would stay for exactly one day in Shiki's apartment, perhaps making some conversation with her, but mostly silently observing the girl, and taking notes about her behaviour. It was investigation at its simplest, and the only real hurdle would be to get Shiki to actually agree to let her stay in her tiny apartment for a day. Rin wasn't sure if Shiki was the sort of person who liked to have a lot of space to herself, but she guessed that in this experiment, she would learn exactly that, and more. Perhaps Shiki, too would gain something from this. Rin could only hope that what she was doing would help rather than harm Shiki, but she could never be sure with a girl like her, who never seemed to live or operate like a normal person. Pretty much all of Rin's general ideas for getting along with people wouldn't work on Shiki, especially since Shiki had no interest at all in going out. With the rain lately, even Rin didn't want to go out at all, either.


Bringing over some fruits and vegetables – quite the opposite of hot noodles, for sure – Rin nearly ran to Shiki's apartment building, slipping lithely through the front glass door and rushing up the stairs holding a plastic bag in one hand. There were the fruits an vegetables of various kinds that Touko's refrigerator had so kindly offered to her, and since they were all fairly plain and simple, Rin believed that Shiki might like them better than the more complexly flavoured soup she made the day before. It was possible she was lying about not liking hot foods, but Rin didn't want to make a gross overstep and end up insulting Shiki in some way.


Almost jumping from side to side on her feet, as if the floor was on fire, Rin knocked three times on Shiki's door, waited a few seconds, and then turned the handle with her free hand, letting herself in just as Touko had done when they had first come here. She felt more independent and fresh today, somehow, and instead of wearing her old clothes she'd put on a white button up shirt and pants, the same style of clothes that Touko herself usually wore, though Rin added her typical red jacket for flavour.


“Yo, Rin. You want to talk to me or something?” Shiki welcomed her guest by her first name, lazily waving one hand as she sat cross-legged on her bed, facing the door. She wasn't any more entertained by Rin's visit today – or, at least, she didn't appear so – but at the same time, wasn't any less entertained. She was just Shiki Ryougi, being rough and tomboyish as usual.


“Oh, hello, Shiki!” Rin showed her a bright, beaming smile. “You seem better today, what's happened since yesterday?”


The girl shrugged, Nothing was really different, she just decided to do something different for a change. Then, she caught sight of Rin's bag. If she had ears like a cat, they would have flicked up and forward immediately, showing her unconscious interest in the food that had been brought. So, she settled for sniffing the air as she usually did, and frowned when she didn't smell any noodles with Rin, instead being unable to discern what the girl had brought for her today.


“Ah, good, you closed that window!” Rain noted, nodding her head at the very much closed window, shrouded by faded reddish blinds that swept from right to left. “This way, you probably won't get a cold. That's why you sneezed last time, after all. You just kept exposing yourself to the cold, and that only makes people sick and lethargic when they're in a place all by themselves.


Shiki just sighed, hanging her head and letting herself fall backwards onto her waiting pillows. Her own disinterest was palpable, and only shifted when Rin dropped the surprisingly heavy bag of fruits and such foods right on the foot of the bed, placing a hand on her hip. In her other hand, she already had examined the contents of the bag and found a peach waiting for her. Seeing it as a perfectly good fruit to eat, she took that, and then let Shiki's curiosity take her over.


Putting almost her whole hand in that bag, Shiki brought out for herself a plain, red apple. It was very round and a bright, healthy read with a tall figure. However, if had a few scuffs on its gentle, smooth surface, and Shiki sighed as she took a bite out of it. It wasn't as though she didn't like it, of course. She ate it almost voraciously, and tossed the core casually into her garbage bin. Rin noticed that was getting a little full up, so she offered to take it down to the dumpster beside the apartment building, but Shiki just shrugged and said it was a waste of time.


“Shiki,” Rin began, trying to get Shiki's attention by calling her name. “Do you mind if I just... sleep over for the night? Touko's workshop is fine and all, but I'd rather spend the night in here, and get to know you better.”


The girl still in her usual kimono gradually sat up, frowned roughly, and said, “I don't talk,” disproving her own words just as she said them. She gave no confirmation to Rin's question, though, but also didn't deny her, not even bringing it up.


“Eh? Well, of course you do! You certainly talk, Shiki, just not much.”


She shrugged in response. “Exactly.”


Even though it was hard to get much talk out of the girl, Rin was more than willing to try, especially for someone like Shiki. She did have to wonder, though: was she helping Shiki for the girl's own sake, or for her own reasons? After all, she had a lot of guilt to deal with after the incident with the Holy Grail and her sister, and how she was almost unable to save her. Part of the reason why she left Fuyuki was to get away from her sister and her idyllic home life, believing that if she stayed, the memories of Rin's own failures wouldn't go away, and somehow she would end up messing up what the girl had to herself. That invariably led Rin here, to someone she thought she could really help, and truly understand.


Her thoughts only became more clouded. If she was helping Shiki for that reason, then, there was no real emotion in it. It was possible that she wanted to help Shiki just to tie up a loose end from her strange dreams and from her unforgettable past experiences, and to do some good in her life. But, at the same time, doing something good for goodness' sake wasn't what she wanted. That was too selfish, and disrespectful tot eh person being saved, since the reason for which she would be helping Shiki would be to save a person, not to save Shiki specifically. Rin had to question herself, and ask if she was really doing this for Shiki's sake or her own weighted conscience.


Sighing, she realized that, just like Shiki, she was just sitting around and doing nothing, just staring at a blank point on the wall as she thought. Her back straightened and she wondered then, if Shiki was having thoughts just like her. Was that possible? She doubted that someone could put such an incredible, permanent drain on someone as was seen with Shiki and her lethargic lifestyle, but at the same time it seemed more than possible, when Rin thought of her sister Sakura. Then, was it possible for Sakura, who had gone through so much horror in her life, to be similar to Shiki? After all, Shiki's past was sort of an unknown to Rin, other than the car crash incident and the suicide. Rin thought then that, perhaps Shiki's issues were more deeply set than she thought, and something disastrous had happened to her to make her commit suicide, or at least want to do that. Maybe she felt guilt as a result of being unable to kill herself, and was constantly redirecting self-loathing by just doing nothing at all? Rin had to admit that she as a person couldn't actually empathize with people who had gone through so much. Certainly there had been traumatic episodes in her life, like the death of her father and her mother's current status as effectively brain-dead, but even that could not compare to the sheer terror that would lead someone to trying to commit suicide. Throughout her whole life, Rin never once felt that kind of urge, even when her failures regarding her sister were highlighted.


So, she steeled herself, understanding what had to be done. She had to help Shiki overcome her problems and live a happy life, for her sake, not just to save someone. It was a shaky start, and Rin was still doubtful of herself, but this sort of mental declaration was enough for her at the moment. She glanced over at Shiki, who was staring at the fan, her chin resting in her hands, her legs wobbling side to side in the air.


Rin smiled at the girl. She really was unique as a person, and Rin felt a strange sort of attraction towards her. Truly, she was beautiful, and her kimono fit her figure well, especially in the posture she was in, on her stomach. The kimono slipped down her legs about to her knees, revealing her smooth, pale calves. They were actually quite muscular and toned, like someone who ran regularly. That certainly was a bit of a shock. Rin didn't expect Shiki to get out of her house, let alone be a serious runner or jogger. It really gave her all the more reason to stay here with the girl and just observe her like this.


She guessed that Shiki had no problem with her staying over for the night, but had to take a guess as to what their sleeping arrangements would be. Thinking of that, she decided it would be as good a time as any to start talking to her, even in this simple kind of way.


“Is there a futon in the closet, Shiki? I'll need somewhere to sleep.”


The girl just gave one of her usual shrugs. “It doesn't matter. The bed should be big enough for both of us, I guess. If you wanted to sleep by yourself, you probably should've brought your own stuff, y'know.” Rin smirked at that smart idea that she had missed out on, but still... even though Shiki was another girl, it felt odd sleeping with her like this, and her cheeks flushed at the idea.


But, true enough, night was coming, and presumably it would be cold in here, what with the poor weather lately and the overall chills of nighttime. So, Rin really had no reason to object, especially if Shiki herself apparently invited her. Turning her down like that... might be rude, she thought, so just like Shiki she shrugged, and offered up a smile.


Soon enough, the only reason why the small apartment wasn't flooded with darkness was the ceiling light, plain and covered by a glass-half circle to prevent its light from being too glaring on the eyes. It was surprisingly strong, and Rin felt a shudder go down her spine when she tucked herself under the plain, fairly thin bedsheets.


Shiki lazily walked over to a switch on the wall and flicked off the light; her figure was imposing in the darkness, and with the dark colours of her kimono she was actually kind of hard to see. Rin only really noticed her when Shiki slipped in beside her, underneath the bedsheets. She seemed to have no qualms about this, but Rin was grabbing onto the sheets tightly, her cheeks a deep red that couldn't be seen in the pale moonlight that streamed in the apartment's window.


Silence fell across the whole room, and to Rin it felt almost eerie. Shiki didn't make a sound, and Rin believed that she was the only one making any kind of noise at all, turning over, onto her side, then around to her other side, onto her stomach and then her back, just trying to find some comfortable sleeping position. The truth was, it just felt awkward sleeping like this, but she could bear it. Shiki was a nice girl even though she could be rough and antisocial most of the time, and Rin was fine with being near here.


So, she closed her eyes and willed herself to sleep. There was no sense fretting about it, especially since Shiki really didn't seem bothered at all. She'd fallen asleep almost immediately, as if she had been waiting all day to do just that, staying awake only because it was socially expected of her to do just that. Rin rolled her shoulders, getting comfortable, and smiled.


Within moments, she was fast asleep, troubled by nothing at all.

--------------------------------

[Five_X]

----------------------------

The sheets rustled, and Rin awoke to the same darkness that had helped her fall asleep. She hadn't bothered to change into pyjamas, just following Shiki's example and sleeping in her regular clothes. That wasn't too hard, and yet she was awake now, looking around at the dark room.



“Huh?” She mumbled groggily. “Shiki? Did you move, or something?” Rin prodded the space in front of her, not feeling Shiki's skin or kimono. Curious, she sat up in bed, her hair a mess and the sheets all moved about where Shiki had fallen asleep.


Checking the floor, she didn't see a futon set out, nor any bedsheets on the floor to mark Shiki having moved down there to give Rin more room to sleep, or anything like that. The whole apartment room was simply devoid of Shiki's presence, and it sent yet another chill down her spine, giving her goosebumps all along her arms and legs. Something was wrong here.


“I should have been watching... if I want to help her, then I don't need to sleep.” Rin smacked the heel of her palm against her forehead, chastising herself for making such an obvious, stupid mistake. But, there was nothing she could do. The door was closed, as was the window, and it looked as if no one had left, or perhaps as if Shiki was never there in the first place. Rin shook her head, trying to clear her mind and get herself thinking rationally again. There was no way she could solve this if she was so tired, and she almost fell backwards back onto the bed.


She sighed and hung her head, with no wise course of action available to her. There was no easy choice. It was dangerous to go outside, because of the murders, and yet if Shiki ended up being one of the people killed, Rin would never be able to forgive herself. That, in fact, could very well push her off the ledge that was holding her sanity and guilt in check. She held her head, trying to think of something, of anything.


Rin rationalized that maybe Shiki could defend herself. She was a few years older than Rin herself, and seemed strong. Her legs were tough, and she could probably run far and run fast if she really had to, and it seemed unlikely that this killer could catch her. It was possible, but Rin didn't want to think for a second that Shiki was in danger.


Then, she wondered about something else: what was Shiki, to her? She knew, at least, that she was someone she had known when she was younger, and of whom she had incredibly strong memories of. Shiki was the one person that Rin believed she could save, but how was Shiki supposed to see that? Was she supposed to see Rin just as a saviour? Rin didn't like that idea; it placed too much emphasis on her own role in the situation. Then... was Rin a friend to Shiki? Perhaps, but maybe not yet. They were getting close, and Rin sensed that Shiki at least didn't dislike Rin's presence in her house, even for extended periods of time. But, Rin thought for a moment that maybe she wanted something more than that. More than just friendship.


Companionship. Rin's mind was filled with images of Shirou and Sakura, a happy, loving couple who adored each other and were a perfect pair. Even though Shiki was another girl, Rin felt something strong towards her, beyond just an urge to save her. In a way, it felt like a crush, or even love. It was something strong, and it was something that Rin believed had been there for a long time; it had just been buried for so long that when it emerged just now, she didn't know how to interpret it. Did she love Shiki? That... was too abstract for Rin to think about. She broke it down into simpler elements, and questioned herself.


Did she want to embrace Shiki, and hold her against her own body? Yes, of course.


Did she want to tell her that her life would be okay, and that she could be happy? Certainly.


Did she want to place Shiki above everyone else in her life? Rin... wasn't sure.


Shiki was an amazing girl, like no one else Rin had met in her whole life, and would always hold a special place in her heart. To be completely honest, she knew that no one else could ever really compare to that. The intrigue, the years of separation, would be impossible to replicate no matter how hard she tried. Rin shook her head, and found that she was breathing heavily, her clothes sticking to her skin with sweat.


The room was hot, and she heard the door creak open. Her head reflexively turned upwards, and she stared at whoever was intruding on her thoughts. She caught sight of a hand, and an arm, long and robed, and then the door opened fully.


There, standing in the moonlight cast down upon her by the window, was Shiki Ryougi, the look in her eyes as sharp as a knife. There was a strange light to her features, and she seemed somehow lucid. Her skin, even more so know than it had ever been, was livid, and yet her eyes stood out, a special light in their dark depths. It wasn't the dull, glassy look she wore all the time during the day. Instead, it was something more harsh, yet serene. The moonlight glinted off of her eyes like off of polished steel, and Rin gasped, barely even able to breathe.


Yet, her lips were still curved into a frown, still showing no emotion whatsoever. They looked strangely vivid and red, as is she had suddenly decided to wear lipstick tonight.


No words were exchanged between the two, and Rin didn't even know how to react to this. Though this was Shiki, at the same time... it wasn't. There was no way Shiki would be like this. It was an impossibility. The girl that looked just like Shiki Ryougi stretched out her arm, holding it at a slightly low angle, and Rin watched as a dark line traced its way down, down, down to her hand, eventually reaching her finger and dripping off. It was surreal, like a dream in and of itself, and Rin clutched at her chest, her whole body tightening up, the room hotter than ever even with the door open and the sight ahead that was so chilling it could freeze the very air.


Rin lowered her head and rubbed at her eyes, trying to rid herself of this apparition that was striking at her with its steely glare. She didn't want to see it. It- this thing, whatever it was, was corrupting the image of Shiki. Rin wouldn't let it be so cruel.


And, when she looked up to stare at it, narrowing her eyes harshly, it was gone entirely, vanished from the realm of the visible. Rin didn't understand this; there was no trace of prana in the air to indicate that a spell had been cast, yet at the same time this was no ordinary event. What happened to Shiki? Rin's mind was being overloaded with questions and information and speculation, and she fell backwards, unable to contain it all. As much as she wanted to stay awake, her body wouldn't listen to her mind's pleas, and relinquished the night to restful sleep.

-------------------------

[Five_X]

---------------------------

As if nothing happened last night, Shiki was back in her bed, sleeping contentedly, and waking as soon as the rays of the sun stretched across the horizon, peeking in her apartment's window. Rin was still fast asleep, breathing softly. Even Shiki couldn't resist curiosity, and she placed a hand on Rin's slowly rising chest, feeling her breath and the thump-thump of her beating heart. It was a strange sensation, and one she was entirely unused to. It was the feeling of life, of a person unhindered by pain nor by death, and Shiki couldn't understand that. Shiki pressed her hand down tight as if to constrict Rin to the bed with just that pressure alone, thinking on this. Rin was unable to respond or speak in this state. In a way, she was no different from an animal crossing the street, the same things that are mercilessly crushed by passing vehicles on late nights.



But... the sensation of life was so great within Rin Tohsaka that Shiki was in a way shocked. She'd never known the feeling of 'life,' only nothingness and death. Those things were irreconcilable, but somehow this girl who had so much life inside her to give was helping a person whose own existence was controlled by nothingness, by a strange attraction to death and those things that were closely related to death.


Shiki never understood how something could possess 'life' in a sense. How was that possible? Life was an abstract condition, after all. If someone is sleeping, then they are unconscious and their body is resting, working off of a minimum amount of energy. Isn't that state not so far from death? Death is so often called by names such as 'The Great Sleep' and comparisons to resting and the like are infinite in number. So, then, if Rin Tohsaka is sleeping, her body barely even alive in a philosophical sense, then why and how could Shiki feel such life inside her? There was a sense of hopefulness there, too, an unconscious understanding that she would awake the next day. Shiki wondered if that was just blind optimism, or the truth. She licked her lips.


Blood was called the 'fluid of life' just as death had its other, prettier, names, so why was it that in death, the fluid of life was seen so clearly, and smelled and tasted so vividly? Perhaps that was why Shiki saw blood as so intriguing, even more than death. Blood, above perhaps anything else, symbolized life, as it was needed for nearly all animals, regardless of whether it was cold or warm or something in between. Yet, that last time, five years ago...


...Shiki had watched as the blood seeped down her body, wetting her clothes. It poured from within her, spilling out, a black, blighted stain on her. Yet even as it ran down her body, even as Shiki's own body lost so much blood from the wound she had given herself, she didn't die. Even with a lack of that 'fluid of life' she still held onto what life she had. That made her sick. She couldn't stand it. If blood was so pointless, if she could lose so much of it and still live on, then why did it exist in the first place? Perhaps it wasn't Shiki who lacked blood, but other people who needed a lack of it.


And, so it was that Shiki found herself feeling the heartbeat of Rin Tohsaka, wondering if the girl even noticed her actions. She was vibrant, youthful, and healthy. There was probably enough blood in her body to stain the whole white bed sheet a pure, uncorrupted red, and leave even more left to coat the bed, too. So, did Rin Tohsaka need that blood? Shiki wondered that as she traced a line with her finger on the most vulnerable spots of her small, feminine body.


For some reason, it pained her to think that. For the first time in her new life, Shiki was just slightly aware of the lack of something that welled up inside her. There was something she was missing, and she couldn't possibly comprehend what it was. She placed Rin's hand on her own chest, and wondered if her own heartbeat had that same life, that same vibrancy.


Rin slept peacefully, unaware of Shiki's thoughts as she watched her sleep. Perhaps, she thought, they weren't so different in the end.

--------------------------

[Five_X]

-----------------------------

“G-good morning, Shiki...” Mumbled a tired Rin as the sunlight beamed down onto her eyes, and she was unable to sleep any longer. Sweat still stuck her clothes to her body and she almost jolted right awake, sitting up sharply and forcing herself to take deep, controlled breaths to get herself calm again.



She shook her head. “Shiki! You're... you're back here, huh...” Her voice trailed off as she stared at the girl laying down at the other end of the bed in front of her legs like a cat, comfortable with just watching Rin wake up.


“Hm. Took you long enough. Almost made me think you were dead or something.” Shiki deadpanned as usual, her expression bored and blank. But, Rin noticed something off about her that had been missing in days past, a certain look to her eyes or a cast to her face that wasn't there before. She couldn't exactly put her finger on it, but there was something unusual about Shiki today.


“Ugh...” Rin massaged her temples, trying to get her head clear again. “I had a nightmare last night... you were standing in the doorway, a weird look on your face. You didn't say anything, and it felt like you were going to kill me.” She shook her head even more vigorously than before. “I'm sorry if that's rude or anything, it's just... I thought you might want to know. I was worried about you. Touko told me that there have been a few murders around here, and I thought for a while that... maybe you got involved with that, somehow. But, since you're here this morning, I guess you're fine!” Rin smiled at the girl, who as wearing a new kimono, one that looked no different from the one she had worn the day before, and the day before that.


“Is that right, huh?” Shiki said this without any real emotion, and scoffed as if it really was just a dream. “Maybe you should've slept on the floor or something, then.” She shrugged, more halfheartedly than usual, and returned to staring at Rin vaguely, her eyes examining the girl's curves but not in a sexual manner, just examining her as one would look at an animal, perhaps with a light of interest in her eyes. Rin couldn't help but think that something about this was wrong, and she raised her legs up to her chest, hanging her head and holding her knees.


She let out a sigh. “This is too troublesome, honestly... but, I wonder, how are you feeling, Shiki? Did you get a good night's sleep?”


Shiki still had a blank look on her face. “I slept as well as I could with a fidgety schoolgirl right beside me.”


Holding her legs even tighter to her chest, Rin almost threw a pillow at Shiki. “I am not a schoolgirl! I don't even go to school anymore, thank you very much!”


“You dropped out, too, huh?” Shiki said, and yet Rin had no idea of how to react. Well, she understood perhaps what Shiki may have been implying with her words, maybe missing some of the meaning. She mostly believed that Shiki had to quit school because of the accident, or just didn't go because she became so lethargic that school was just a hassle for her.


In a sense, that was part of what Rin liked so much about Shiki. Not only was she someone who legitimately needed her help, she was also someone who, with nearly every single thing she said, revealed some hidden depths that Rin had no idea existed, or had never put thought to. Shiki was the exact sort of person she had been looking for all her life.


Rin pursed her lips, and as much as she tried, she couldn't forget that strange scene from the night before. Really, there was only one thing she could do now, and though she didn't want to, she had to leave Shiki for now.


She turned and stood up off of the bed, and straightened her clothes out. Paying one small visit to the bathroom to fix up her messy hair, Rin was ready to leave.


“Alright, bye, Shiki!” She smiled, winking at her friend who didn't even leave the bed, curled up there. “Have a good day, and remember that I'll be back sometime this afternoon or evening! You can't get rid of me yet.” With that, she took her purse in one hand and left the small apartment room, closing the door behind her. She wondered for a moment if there were things Shiki did alone that Rin wouldn't have been able to see if she just sat there and observed her, but decided that such things would come to light eventually. Overall, she definitely felt that she was making a good deal of progress with Shiki, and despite the nightmare of yesterday she was entirely eager to help Shiki with whatever problems she had.

--------------------------

[Five_X]

-----------------------------------

As expected, Touko was sitting around in her office, poring over some research papers and documents. From a distance, Rin couldn't read them, but she guessed that they had something to do with the string of murders lately, and yet Touko turned around in her chair to face Rin when she entered the office.


“Did it go well?” The red-haired woman asked, a pencil held in her hand, occasionally spun about. “You look a little... dishevelled. Did anything interesting happen?”


Rin was about to just shake her head, then she recalled that dream again, and she let out a frustrated sigh as if what she was doing was utterly fruitless. “Yeah, there was... something strange at night. I'm not sure how to explain it, but I think Shiki actually left the apartment sometime at night. She returned in the morning, but I still have to wonder what went on last night. Do you know if there was a murder anywhere in the city?”


“Actually, there wasn't.” Touko raised an eyebrow, shrugging. It was clear that even she didn't know exactly what was going on, but her interest in the case remained constant.


“Hmm...” Rin placed a finger on her chin, trying to think more in-depth about this. “Do you think that, maybe, Shiki went outside, found the killer, and defended herself? After all, she's the kind of person who wouldn't really show any reaction to the event after the fact, especially around other people. It sounds kind of crazy, but...” Rin trailed off, and stared at her feet. This was an odd case and she didn't want to get into it too deeply, but if it involved Shiki in any way she would absolutely figure out what was going on. If the murders and Shiki's condition were in any way connected, then Rin would have two things to solve. It frustrated her a little, but since this was what she had put her absolute focus on, there was really no changing what she had to do.


“Shiki, huh?” That seemed to make a little sense to Touko. “Before the accident, she did have some... violent tendencies, I'll admit. I honestly wouldn't doubt it if she was able to defend herself even from this crazed murderer. Still, it'd be best to keep an eye on her more often from now on, especially at night.”


Rin hung her head, reminded of how she had just fallen asleep in Shiki's room rather than staying awake to keep watch over the girl as she slept. The only way to watch her at all times, though, would be to keep cameras in her room, and not only did Rin not want to be so intrusive, she also knew that going to such an extent would be far too expensive and time-consuming; thus the only real way to watch Shiki would be to stay in her room. There were flaws in that, yes, but it was the best Rin could do. She honestly wanted to help Shiki, and she'd do as much as she possibly could to help the girl get over her problems.


She snapped her fingers, coming up with an idea. “I've got it! If I want to watch her more properly, then I should go out and try to find the killer myself. I'll rest a bit now, and later in the evening I'll go to Shiki's apartment, see how she's doing, and then do a patrol of the area.”


Touko smirked. “That's... a little dangerous, don't you think?”


Rin shrugged, and almost laughed at Touko's words. With a flip of her hair she said, “I'm Rin Tohsaka. A simple murderer cannot deal with magecraft, and I honestly doubt that I would have any trouble with him or her or whatever this is. I'm very capable, you know, and there's very little short of demons and vampires and related creatures that could really pose a threat to me.”


“Heh, the Tohsaka head is a confident one, is she?” Touko laughed, smiling at the tenacious girl. She liked the attitude she had, really, and was glad she was the one who decided to help Shiki.


“As a magus of my stature, I naturally have to have at least some self-confidence, you know.” She smirked at Touko, her expression one of serene superiority. Though when she was dealing with Shiki she tried her best to be friendly and understanding, her real personality, or at least the one she had before the Grail War, was that of an arrogant girl. After all, with the power she had at her fingertips, being so confident was almost a given. When it came to general magecraft, Rin was definitely superior to Touko, who had less formal training and specialized in puppets rather than more outward, offensive types of magecraft.


But, as Rin headed off to sleep for the rest of the day, she knew that she had a solid plan ready to put to use. If she could protect Shiki, then her main goal would be aided, and if she could stop this nocturnal murderer, then Touko would probably owe her even more. It was, as she saw it, a win-win situation, and she smiled. It was rare for her to end up being this lucky, but she wouldn't take this for granted. It was a perfect opportunity, and she wasn't the kind of person who would waste any opportunity.

-----------------------

[Five_X]

---------------------

The rain falling from the sky was heavy and wet, and Rin wondered if her umbrella could even hold up against it. All around her were the sounds of pattering raindrops on the ground, and some cars going through the wet streets, splashing up puddles onto the sidewalks, nearly hitting Rin as she passed by. She let out a long sigh as she walked, but knew that this was her calling. Shiki needed her, and there was no way that she would just ignore this.



In her mind she was chastising herself for having slept so long. It was about eight o'clock at night and the sun had already set, leaving the city streets covered in darkness only mitigated by the lampposts lining the sidewalk, streaming down their orange light.


Ahead, the apartment building looked just as it had on the first night that Rin had seen it, the rain creating an effect as though grey lines had been painted all over the structure, top to bottom, and it was dismal at best. Rin hoped that Shiki wouldn't go out at this time of night, and thought that was at least a little possible, given the driving rain and sheer cold of this one night. It was as if the weather up until this one point had been just a facade, a dress rehearsal to this tempestuous night, and Rin frowned. There was no one else walking the streets, so at the very least the killer probably wouldn't claim anyone's life tonight... but that thought only made Rin worried about Shiki again.


She wiped her wet and muddied boots on the entrance mat of the apartment complex then stepped inside, closing her umbrella and looking about. As usual the lobby was empty, the only real life in the room being a goldfish in a bowl, lazily swimming about on the receptionist's desk, lighted up by a small lamp. It was a simple scene, but Rin couldn't linger here for long.


Stepping up the stairs, Rin gradually made her way up to the floor where Shiki's own apartment was located. She still felt a little groggy and even nauseous from sleeping for so many hours of the day, but that only meant that she didn't need anymore sleep that night, so she thought. She could watch over Shiki, and be a proper guardian to her.


The hallways felt longer than usual tonight, and Rin's breathing was heavy by the time she got to Shiki's door. She let out a sigh, and placed her hand on the knob, turning it gently. She didn't expect Shiki to be awake now, so knocking would only be a disturbance, especially to other people living here. It was odd, though: Shiki never kept her door locked, which was somewhat safe in an apartment like this, but it still managed to worry Rin a little.


Knitting her eyebrows, she opened the door to Shiki's apartment, letting the door creak a little and hit the plastic nub on the wall.


Yet... there was something strange about this. Rin let go of the doorknob as if it was scorching hot, recoiling her hand and staring into the darkness of the room. She could hear the whirring of the mechanical fan, and saw the blinds flutter gently with a cool wind wafting in. The room was incredibly cold, and Rin felt lightheaded at this.


The sheets on the bed were ruffled, as if Shiki hadn't even bothered to fix them. In fact, Shiki was nowhere to be seen in the room.


Rin pulled up her sleeve and narrowed her eyes. A pale green light in the shape of an electronic circuit covered her whole forearm. Her Mystic Code. She wouldn't let herself be caught off guard, and she prepared herself for whatever might have been hiding in the room. If not Shiki, then perhaps the killer, looking for revenge after Shiki had insulted them by defending herself. Rin didn't know much about murderers, but didn't think that outcome was too unlikely. She looked left and right, trying to find any place that someone could hide. The closet was the most obvious place, but Rin wondered if there was somewhere else, as well.


A chill went down her spine, slowly, making her feel the strange, tingling sensation.


Her body was hardly reacting to her mind telling it to turn around. As if she was frozen she spun about incredibly slowly on her feet, her heart pounding in her chest, telling her that something was utterly wrong with this scenario. She only wanted to know what it was. Her breath became shallow, almost ragged, and when she had fully turned about, the dire sensation of something all too near her reached its peak.


Rin's eyes met two others, dull and brown, only the moonlight from the apartment room allowing them to even be seen, just a little. Rin stepped backwards, almost tripping over herself. She caught sight of brown hair, and looked down. The person right in front of her had a knife, its blade gleaming in the night's only light. It rose up, mechanically, as if coerced to move by some otherworldly force. Rin gasped.


There was no denying it, and this couldn't possibly be a dream. It felt too real. It was Shiki holding that knife, and Rin only found herself stepping backwards more and more, the apparition that was all too real keeping up with every move she made. The kimono fluttered lightly as a breeze entered the room from the window, and Rin found her back against a solid wall. There was nowhere for her to go, and her heart nearly shut down at that revelation.


“Sh-shiki! What are you doing?” She asked, but her questions were useless. The knife was coming for her. The light on Rin's arm faded; there was no way that she would use her magic on Shiki, the danger was far too great. This reminded her all too much of a situation she had been in not so long ago, and the thought burned through her mind:


If she wanted to live, she would have to act. Yet, she didn't want to kill Shiki. There was no plain answer to this situation, and Rin shook her hea,d trying to rid herself of this nightmare.


It was all too real.


Taking in a deep breath, Rin stared forward, a steely look in her eyes, their fire lit up once more. Even if she wasn't going to hurt Shiki, she would stop this. There was no way her new friend would do something like this, and Rin kept denying that this was even happening. Shiki wouldn't act like this. Even though the silence and blank stare were all too in character, Rin wouldn't accept it. She could never accept it, really.


“Shiki! Why can't you understand?” Rin shouted, her lips curling into a sad frown.


For the first time, Shiki frowned, too. Yet, it wasn't sorrowful in any way; it was more matter of fact, and even emotionless, just as Shiki always was. “I don't want to understand, Rin.”


The way the girl said her name nearly made Rin double over with actual pain, striking her right in the heart. It took just those few words, but they had incapacitated Rin more than what any knife could do.


Why? Rin asked herself, why couldn't Shiki understand? Why didn't she want to understand? Even in this life or death scenario, Rin felt just as strongly for Shiki as she had that morning. She didn't know her own feelings, but there was no way that she could resolve this without making a choice. Perhaps Shiki wanted to force Rin into making up her mind, or perhaps that was Rin just imagining things Shiki couldn't have even known. Really, in this situation, neither one knew exactly what was going on.


Devoid of any other alternatives, Rin closed her eyes and pressed her body forward, wrapping her arms around Shiki's thin, feminine body. Letting everything else go, she brought her her lips to Shiki's, and stopped thinking about today, tomorrow, or the day before. Right now, there was only this one moment.


Shiki, now, was the one who couldn't move. Her whole body was like a doll under Rin's absolutely control, and the knife just dropped freely from her hand. There was no way she could comprehend this, and she just let Rin control her actions for her. She didn't react to the kiss, just letting Rin do as she wished.


Gently, Rin brought her face away from Shiki's and looked her in the eyes. A hot blush burned across her cheeks and her whole body started feeling warm. Realizing that she was in control, Rin laid Shiki down on the bed, putting her head in one of the pillows, as if setting her to sleep. This was all she could think of, right now.


She took a deep breath, and got on her knees on the bed, right in front of Shiki. The girl seemed to understand what was going on, yet at the same time, didn't. The expression on her face was blank and emotionless as usual, and neither did her eyes betray any real feelings. Still, Rin knew that if she was going to do anything immediately to help Shiki, it would be this. Shiki reacted poorly just to words and simple gestures, so Rin had to show how she felt towards her in another, more carnal way.


Leaning forward, Rin slipped some loose locks of hair behind her ear and shoulder, getting them out of the way. Her face was now level with Shiki's body, and she brought her hands forward to explore the girl's hidden corners. Even though the wind blowing in the room was chilling, Rin and Shiki both felt hot, hotter than they had ever been, as if fires were burning inside them both.


There was a slit down the side of Shiki's kimono, and Rin took advantage of this. She let one hand slide up that, parting Shiki's clothing to either side. Bringing her hands behind the girl's back she undid the belt of the kimono, moving it out of the way with extreme care, trying not to disturb Shiki's body at all as she did so. Eventually the slit in the kimono was wide enough to reveal Shiki's inner thighs, her crotch, and her navel. That was just enough for Rin, and she let out a soft sigh. Shiki didn't wear anything at all under her clothes.


Bringing her face ever forward, she let her tongue out, touching it softly against Shiki's flesh. She lightly laved at the girl's belly button, kissing it, and looking up at Shiki. The girl hardly reacted, perhaps only staring at Rin out of curiosity, rather than arousal.


Rin pursed her lips, and took another deep breath as she slipped downwards, her hands moving up to Shiki's chest. Shiki didn't have large breasts; they were quite small and close to being masculine, but under Rin's hands they felt beautiful, even through the fabric of the kimono. With two fingers she pinched Shiki's nipple, caressing through the fabric, rubbing gently. She smiled when she found that it was getting hard, and could be seen jutting up a little through the kimono. Rin returned to just kneading the soft flesh of her breast.


She placed one last kiss on Shiki's soft, plump lips, and then brought her face down, down to the girl's untouched crotch. Her skin down there was light and warm, almost burning hot. She had a little hair surrounding her little slit, but nothing else. Rin gulped, having never done this before, but knowing what to do. She knew the theory of it, but had no practice.


Being slightly more comfortable with this since Shiki was a girl, Rin stuck out her tongue, letting it lave at the outer folds of Shiki's feminine sex, not yet daring enough to slip inside. Even from down there Rin could hear Shiki's accelerating breathing, and with her hand on her breast she felt the rise, up and down, of the girl's petite chest.


With a light smile, Rin buried her face further into Shiki's crotch, smelling the light, sweaty fragrance. It smelled good, and there was just something about Shiki that was enticing, and arousing. Rin planted a kiss on the lips of Shiki's slit, and then brought her tongue out again. Pushing farther in, now, Rin licked at Shiki's clit, spreading apart her folds with her other hand, rubbing her fingers along the outside of Shiki's sex.


Shiki winced, unable to hide her feelings. Rin glanced up for a moment, seeing that Shiki was enjoying this. No matter how she usually acted, and no matter what her mind wanted her to do, it was obvious that at least Shiki's body accepted this pleasure, and wanted more. Rin chuckled lightly, her hot breaths puffing against Shiki's sensitive skin. She'd never been touched where Rin was touching her, and she had never once felt this sort of sensation. It was something new to her entirely, and she really didn't know how to react.


Rin turned her attention back to pleasuring Shiki, her tongue sliding up and down the inner folds of Shiki's sex, rubbing and pressing down on her clit, making her gasp once, then twice. There was no way that even Shiki could resist this, and she just gave in.


Rin's tongue pressed to its farthest yet inside Shiki's slit, actually pushing within the girl's tight, untouched hole. Two fingers kept the passage open, parting the folds of skin so that Rin's tongue could pass through. The movements of her other hand, caressing Shiki's breast, became more agitated and quick, even rough, groping the girl through her kimono. Rin slipped her tongue inside Shiki, getting saliva inside her like it was cum.


The hot, wet sensation was all too much for Shiki, and she couldn't silence her own pleasured moans. Rin, too, was getting aroused by this, breathing hard and moaning just to make Shiki even more pleasured by this. Her tongue was a perfect fit in the tight hole, breaching ever further inwards, licking at Shiki's insides, almost vibrating. It filled the small passage, working its way about inside Shiki, and she brought her hand onto Rin's head, trying to keep her down.


Rin pressed her whole mouth to Shiki's crotch, kissing her passionately there, getting her tongue as far in as it could possibly go, wiggling it around inside Shiki. The taste was exquisite, sweet and wet, and more of Shiki's liquid started dripping out, escaping Rin's hungry lips as they caressed Shiki's clit. Shiki's body couldn't handle it anymore. Her hand pressed down more and more upon Rin's head, holding her tight to her crotch, and Rin responded by speeding up her motions, bringing Shiki to her peak. Her other hand went to Rin's shoulder, grabbing her as tightly as she could. Her long, sharp fingernails dug into Rin's flesh, sending pain through the girl's body that went ignored even as blood rose up from the stinging would.


Shiki let out a yell, which faded into a long and satisfied sigh, and the pressure she put on Rin's head began to disappear, her fingernails sliding against her skin, no longer tightly gripping. Her sticky liquid began pouring out of her slit and Rin eagerly lapped it up, wanting to drink it all without question. She smiled happily, glad that she could make Shiki of all people feel so good. Eventually Shiki's hands fell to her sides; the girl was absolutely exhausted, her body unable to keep her awake and active.


Laying in her bed, Shiki fell asleep, with Rin licking at her crotch, cleaning up all the fluids that had spilled out. Even with her efforts, though, there was a dark, damp stain on the sheets, and Rin smiled at it as she licked her lips. Shiki's chest rose slowly and steadily, her breath soft and warm, and Rin just sat beside her, watching the girl sleep.


The look on her face was so innocent and cute that Rin almost forget what had happened only minutes ago. How could this Shiki, the girl that Rin had sworn to protect and the girl that was, right now, sleeping so peacefully, be the same girl that nearly killed her? It was impossible, yet... there was still clearly something wrong with Shiki, something far greater than Rin had ever seen. Perhaps... perhaps Rin, as well, wasn't understanding Shiki.


She slid Shiki's hair behind her ear, giving her a better view of the girl's beautiful face. Rin smiled at this sight, and it reminded her of who she was trying to protect. She was trying to make Shiki into the person that she really could be, and she wouldn't stop for anything to achieve that. If Shiki had problems running deeper than what Rin originally thought, then so be it. She would deal with them as they came, no matter what they were.


It unnerved her that Shiki could be so violent, though, and she knew that she had to put an end to this. Tomorrow, she said to herself, she would find the cause of all of this and put an end to it. Shiki was more important to Rin than she knew.


And, then, Rin realized something. She hadn't really understood it, nor had she accepted it, but now she believed that she understood, finally and truly.


She was in love with Shiki, and nothing would change that.


Heat rose up within her, and her breath became short and shallow again. It was such a sudden and unusual revelation that she didn't know how to react, but at the very least she knew that she was happy. No matter what it took, she would make Shiki understand that she truly loved her, and perhaps she would make Shiki love her as well. Rin smiled at the sleeping girl.


Yet, she couldn't stay here tonight. It was too dangerous, and she would have to approach Shiki somewhere else. For now, she'd go back to Touko's office, and come back tomorrow night. There was still one place, Rin remembered, that could perhaps bring this all to a close.


She glanced one last time at Shiki, then left the room, closing the door behind her. Rin winced a little as the pain in her shoulder came back to her, but it wasn't too much for her to bear. As long as she kept focused on Shiki, she believed she could get through nearly anything.

-------------------------

[Five_X]

--------------------------------

It was another pale night.


Touko had tried to stop Rin from leaving again, but she brushed her off, not wanting to have to depend on anyone else to help Shiki. This was something she alone had to do, and as much as Rin appreciated Touko's willingness to help, she had to do this herself or else it wouldn't have the same meaning as she meant for it to have.


For Rin, this night meant a lot. She wasn't going to visit Shiki. No, she was going somewhere else, out of town, where this old memory first began. The rain fell down upon her, and she had no umbrella; she didn't need one, since the rain had no real effect on her spirits. Regardless of the weather, she would continue on. She didn't know exactly where she was going, only having a memory and a dream to guide her along. Rin knew, though, that so long as she followed this it would lead her to exactly where she needed to go.


Last night, there had been no murder. That only compounded Rin's suspicions, and she knew that she could no longer play innocent around Shiki. Something drew her friend, the girl she was in love with, to commit atrocities every night, but the had suspiciously stopped the day after Rin came to this city and met with Shiki. She realized that the so-called dream that she had in the hot room with Shiki staring at her was far from a dream. That was her first glimpse of the killer inside Shiki, and yet in her insistence that Shiki was innocent in this, she ignored it, played dumb.


She would do so no longer.


Breathing the cool, fresh night air as if she was drinking it, Rin continued forward. She was in the forest on the outskirts of the city, going down a long and mostly abandoned road. Memories were catching up to her; she heard the rumble of a car coming from behind her, but she looked and there was nothing at all. Kirei's words from long ago echoed in her mind.


Humans try so hard to avoid death, he said, and wondered on that point. It was something that Rin was now questioning, too, as she walked towards what could very well be her own death. Perhaps, like Kirei, Shiki was someone who didn't see death just as most people did, and perhaps she too had a certain emptiness in herself. Kirei filled that void with perversity, seeing the world in a twisted way, accepting his view as different and not accepting that void, but filling it. In a way, it was like looking at a hole, and arguing that because the hole contained darkness that it was 'full' in a strange sense. To Rin, that was a completely alien way of looking at the world, and it made her sick.


However, Shiki wasn't like that. Rather than seeing the hole as full, she accepted it as empty and did nothing about that fact, when most people would try to fill that same hole. What made her functionally different from Kirei was that Kirei couldn't be changed; the hole he saw was filled, and there was nothing that could be done about it, whereas Shiki needed someone to make her understand that the hole she saw, that void, that nothingness, needed to be filled. Rin let out a grim laugh as she wondered if love was what the girl was missing.


She trudged along the muddy side of the road, her black boots partly sinking into the soft ground below her feet. She could hear the sound of rain pouring through the treetops, nourishing the life that was all around her, allowing nature to thrive in this abandoned road.


The lampposts still let down their graceful light, even as plants grew up around their bases. The road was perfectly fine, but no one really travelled down it, since a perfectly working highway had been constructed nearby that more effectively linked this city with its neighbours. After all, no one really wanted to drive down this eerie road at night.


But, five years ago, that was exactly what had happened to Rin, and it was that moment, utterly futile and leaving her unable to save the girl she saw, that was burned into her memory like a sharp iron brand. It wouldn't let go, and Rin didn't want it to go.


For it was this one night, so much like the one five years ago, that Rin had true control over her situation. Tonight, she wouldn't just wake up as soon as she reached out to touch Shiki, to hold her and help her deal with those problems that assailed her. This wasn't a dream, she repeated to herself. It was hard to realize, but this really was the truth of the situation. It didn't feel like this was even happening to her, but it was and she couldn't let it go. When everything else felt fake, there was still Shiki waiting for her, somewhere. Rin knew that even she had some memory of this place, regardless of how dire it was.


There were two adjacent lights up ahead. Rin recalled from her dream that those marked the entrance to a pathway, the same one that Shiki had been standing right in front of years ago.


A scream rang out in the night, but was silenced in mere moments.


Rin was spurred on by that, and ran even faster. She had to make it, regardless of how much of a toll was wracked on her body. She knew what had to be done, and it would be done. Shiki was so close that Rin swore she could smell her fragrance on the night winds, amongst the sweet scents of the trees covered with rain.


So it was that Rin, completely drenched all across her body, came upon the scene.


The sharp flavour of blood was in the air; Rin knew it all too well. It filled her lungs, filled her senses, and it made her want to run back. But, she ignored that urge. She wouldn't be swayed by this, not now, not ever. Shiki was too close for her to give up now. Yet, right in front of her, was a grisly scene with Shiki at its centre.


Blood ran from a shadow in the forest, streaking across the gravel path that lead into the midst of the trees. A man's head could be seen, violently twisted to the side at an angle that was undoubtedly fatal. A cut ran down his shoulder, and blood was still pouring down his body. He didn't speak any more, though, for he was dead. Shiki stood over the body, a long, deadly knife in her hand, pointed downwards. The blade was coated in blood that dripped menacingly from the tip, and Rin couldn't help but gasp at this scene. It was bloody and sick.


“Wh...why? Why are you doing this!?” Rin nearly screamed at Shiki, getting the girl's attention as she slowly turned her head to face Rin. This made no sense in Rin's mind; this was the work of a murderer, a psychopath, not the girl that she loved.


In the rain, her clothes soaked with water and blood, the light making a halo about her body... Shiki smiled. It was a pale, emotionless smile, and Rin didn't understand it. Why did the first time this girl smiled have to be right after she killed someone? Rin didn't want it to be true, but she knew all too well that denying it wouldn't get her anywhere. This was happening, she forced herself to realize, and she had to stop it. This time, she wouldn't fail the person who needed her help. She would save Shiki before she succumbed to this void inside her.


“Rin.” Shiki's cold, emotionally dead voice was clear and commanding, instantly getting Rin's attention. “Why are you here? Why do you want to save me?” She spoke more words than Rin had expected, but this was nothing that would intimidate her.


Rin refused to answer those questions and asked one question of her own: “You remember this place, don't you?”


“Five years... huh, was it really such a long ago?” Shiki was half speaking to herself at that point. “You probably know it by now. I tried to kill myself here, and failed. I don't know why, but something stopped me from just dying.”


Rin frowned, trying to get at the source of this all. “Why did you want to kill yourself? It doesn't make any sense?”


This time, though, it was Shiki's turn to frown, as if disappointed with Rin. “It makes sense, but you can't see how. I've... always had a weird feeling in the back of my mind, telling me that I am nothing, that there is nothing. That was me, telling myself that my life was just an empty hole, filled with nothing at all. So, I thought, if my life is filled with nothing at all, then why live it?”


Symbolically, she drew her knife along her flesh, not striking deep enough to cut, but making enough of an impression for Rin to almost jump forward to stop her. “But, that didn't work. I lived, and when I was in the hospital I did nothing, said nearly nothing and just stayed in my bed. I understood what nothingness meant, I saw that hole with my own eyes. It was hard to relate to anything anymore, and my words were hollow. I wondered if I was really even alive. Eventually, I came to the conclusion that I wasn't, and that maybe there was nothing that was really 'alive' and everyone was just existing in a state of unknowing death. Just like a hole, filled only with air. In a way, that hole is filled, but it's just an illusion. I'm the only one who sees the hole for what it is: empty.” She shook her head, and kicked aside the body that lay near her feet.


“Why can't you fill that hole up, then?” Rin asked, curiously bringing up her simple questions. She had nothing yet enough to respond to, so she first tried to gauge Shiki's own worldview, trying to understand her before helping her. That was exactly what she wanted to to from the start, and really, this wasn't far from what she had initially planned.


Shiki laughed, a strange sound to Rin's ears. “You know when you dig a hole in the dirt, and then fill it with water?” She had a strange, bitter smile on her face. “The water just drains.” Shiki shrugged, having little else to say.


From a philosophical point of view, Rin understood Shiki. In that manner, they were on the same level, speaking about the same things. However, Rin didn't understand why Shiki failed to fill that void inside her, and find happiness.


“You know, Rin...” Shiki began, looking up at the twintailed girl again. “You did challenge my views, once. When I watched you sleep, not so long ago, it was strange. I felt as though, somehow, you managed to fill that hole in your heart, and whatever you put there managed to stay, without just draining into uselessness. I didn't understand that. You... somehow, you had actual life inside you, and...” Shiki trailed off, unable to continue that thought. She shook her head roughly.


In Rin's mind, something suddenly clicked. For once, she honestly understood Shiki, and it was that point about being bothered by the 'life' that Rin had inside her that made her understand. After all, she and Shiki weren't so different, and even though their lives were almost opposites, they had some major similarities, and their fates were entwined in a way that was far beyond undoing.


“I get it now.” Said Rin, a confident look on her face. She stared straight ahead at Shiki, almost glaring at her. “I have the one thing that you lack: a purpose. You saw that in me, a purpose, and it confused you. You suddenly saw how easy it could be to change yourself and give yourself a normal life, but... after all that you've done, it seemed wrong. For you to change like that, those murders wouldn't be justified. Everything you have ever done would be invalidated.”


Shiki wore a rare sneer on her face. “You're selfish, Rin!” She yelled out, stepping closer to the girl who had sworn to save her. “All this time, you couldn't understand exactly what was wrong with me. You jumped to the wrong conclusions, and assumed not that I was missing something, but that something was wrong with me. How... how can you do that, and still say that you had my interests in mind? You really just wanted self-gratification.”


Rin fell to her knees. “No, no... you're wrong!” She was almost crying, suffering a strike right to her heart from Shiki, who didn't even know what Rin had gone through in the past few months. “You think that's just it, but you're wrong! I know someone a lot like you, that I wanted to save. For the longest time, I saw the best way of 'saving' her as just killing her, stopping her from killing any more people. But, that view was changed, only at the last moment. Had I gone on any further without that revelation, I would have killed my sister, completely pointlessly. I didn't think that she could be saved, but... I learned that I was wrong. At the same time, though, I didn't do that myself. In the end, it was the person my sister was in love with that saved her, and I was helping him. I just want to feel that same feeling, the sensation of having honestly saved someone, and helped them past their problems.” She stared back at Shiki, her strength renewing. “I love you, Shiki. I only want to help you. But, at the same time... you have to help me.”


Pursing her lips, Shiki looked downward, thinking about what Rin had said. “So, in other words... in order for you to 'save' me, I need to give you someone to save? As in, myself?”


Rin nodded, a smile almost breaking through her tears. “Exactly! I can give you a purpose, Shiki. I can help you.”


“But I don't have a purpose. I don't even know what purpose I would have.”


Wiping the tears from her eyes, Rin smiled at Shiki. “That in itself is a purpose, you know. Many people go through life not knowing what their purpose is, and they life perfectly ordinary lives. Even if your purpose is to find a purpose, that's enough to make you able to live!”


Shiki, finally, was faced with something that she truly couldn't deny. This girl had gone through so much to help her, coming from nowhere, with old memories and a dream to drive her onwards. She really had no reason to save this girl who was void of emotion, but she did so anyway. Why should Shiki deny her that?


“You... love me, you said?” She asked tentatively, after a long silence.


Rin just nodded.


As the rain fell down onto her face, Shiki smiled again, but this time... it had emotion in it, and it was truly honest and bright. “I... I love you too, Rin.” The words felt foreign and awkward coming out of her mouth, but at the same time she knew that they were right. Only with those words could she explain her feelings for Rin, the feelings that had been gathering for longer than she even remembered.


Shiki walked over to Rin and offered her hand, helping the girl up off of the muddy ground. This was the right thing to do, she realized. Even though her own hand was pale and cold, in the rain, Rin's felt warm, soft, and comforting. She brought the girl to her side, and Rin smiled up at her, truly happy for the both of them.


“I'm glad, Shiki.” Rin said simply. “You've been through so much, and even now there are things that you won't be able to undo, but... we can work past them. There's nothing we can't do, if we stay together.”


Rin put her head on Shiki's shoulder, and together they walked back to Shiki's apartment, to get out of the cold winds and the rain, their hands intertwined. Shiki offered one last, solemn glance at the man she had so violently killed, and knew that stain on her past would never go away.


Still, the future was bright; it was a future where Shiki could smile each and every day.

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[Five_X]

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There was still some time left in the night, and the two weren't going to waste it.



In Shiki's apartment, the cool breeze no longer blowing into the room, Shiki led Rin into her bathroom, and silently they disrobed.


Rin looked up at Shiki and smiled. Shiki was more beautiful than she had ever thought, and she was surprised at how feminine she looked without any clothes on her body. She lacked the obvious, gorgeous curves of Rin, but she had a beauty all her own. Her small breasts were rounded and soft, and her hips were surprisingly wide, matching her long, elegant legs. What Rin paid most attention to, though, was her face. Shiki was smiling down at the girl she loved, and they delicately kissed, their lips meeting each other once again. They felt their warm, gentle breaths on each others skin, and it only made them want to explore their bodies even more.


Shiki leaned over and turned on the tap of the shower, letting the water heat up, and then tentatively stepping in. Water poured all over her, washing off the dried blood, the cool rain and the dirt that had tainted her. Her body was no longer stained, now, and Rin was happy to see Shiki enjoying herself, clean and glad to be alive.


She stepped into the shower alongside Shiki, and they stood awhile, letting the hot liquid pour over them, heating up their bodies, making them slick and wet and free from any dirt or grime. Then, they embraced, their bodies coming together as one.


Rin tilted up her head and pressed her lips tightly to Shiki's, kissing her more passionately than ever before. This time, though, Shiki responded in kind, wrapping her strong arms around Rin, holding her tight to her body. She wasn't going to let this girl go.


Pausing for a moment, wondering if it was okay, Rin slowly slipped her tongue into Shiki's mouth, letting it explore inside there, slipping around, mixing her saliva with Shiki's. Their juices flowed together and their tongues met, slipping against one another and wrestling in their mouths. Their kiss was deep and loving, and it brought them closer together. It felt warm, gentle, and caring, and both Rin and Shiki didn't want it to end.


Their breasts tight against one another, the two lovers realized how close they were, and began to turn their attention to their own legs as they kissed, both knowing exactly what their partner wanted. Their breaths were calm, soft, and rhythmic.


Rin slid her hand down Shiki's side, caressing her stomach, then her thigh, and finally reaching down to her crotch. Shiki followed Rin's movements, trying to figure out exactly what to do, and Rin giggle, encouraging her to keep going. Then Shiki's fingers, too crawled down Rin's body, her thumb playing around with her navel before she reached Rin's slit, feeling the little opening and rubbing in between Rin's folds. She let out a small gasp and began doing the same to Shiki in response, smiling as they continued to kiss.


Still holding Rin's light body with one arm, Shiki brought her fingers inside of the girl, stroking at her core, almost making Rin lose her balance and fall to the floor. Shiki held her up, though, and she kept going. As Shiki's fingers explored her depths, Rin caressed Shiki's clit, pressing lightly down on it, eliciting a few pleasured moans from her. Their bodies were united in pleasure, their actions synchronized and loving. They both wanted to make the other enjoy the moment, and through that they showed their love for each other.


Rin stuck her fingers further and further inside Shiki, breaking past her tightness, slipping inside her walls, wiggling her fingers about to send tingles like lightning through Shiki's body, until she had her fingers buried right up to her hand. There was no room to go any further, and Rin let Shiki's wetness coat her fingers and hand as she stroked in and out, pressing Shiki's walls, making her let out a sharp gasp.


At the same time, though, Rin could almost barely stand as Shiki inserted her fingers into her, sliding gently within, then pulling out, playing with Rin's clit using just her thumb. She shuddered at that, her body shaking and sending little droplets of water down to the wet floor of the shower. With each shock of pleasure sent through her body, Rin contracted her muscles down on Shiki's fingers, only making her feel even better, drawing her lover further inside her.


“Ah, Sh-shiki, please... more.” She broke the kiss and brought her two wet fingers from Shiki's slit up to her mouth, putting them into her mouth and gently licking off the sticky fluids that covered them. Their lips joined soon after and Rin slipped her fingers back inside Shiki's tight sex, digging in, pressing down within exactly where she knew it would make Shiki feel best. Shiki gasped, her fingers tensing up inside Rin and her breaths becoming short and shallow, almost unable to cope with the pleasure that was tingling throughout her body.


Shiki winced as Rin's fingers pressed even further inside her. “Just a b-bit more, Rin... I-I'm almost there...” Her voice was breathy, and it was clear that she was going to climax soon.


Rin stroked Shiki's inner walls, feeling her muscles tense down on her fingers, making it hard to move them around. Still, she wriggled them about, drawing them in and out, and one final shudder of ecstasy was sent through Shiki's body as she nearly collapsed right then and there, breaking the kiss, not uttering a single sound. Her liquids spilled down from her crotch, coating Rin's fingers and her hand, and Rin raised that same hand to her mouth, wanting to taste Shiki again and again.


But, Shiki wasn't done yet. She pressed Rin against the shower wall, her soft butt squishing against the hard, cold tiles. She gulped and watched as Shiki tilted her head and took one of Rin's hard nipples in her mouth, rolling her tongue around it and biting it gently in her mouth. Rin let out a small gaso and placed one hand on the back of Shiki's head, caressing her soft but soaked hair, drawing her fingers through it as she tried to hold in the immense pleasure that was pouring through her body as Shiki played with her breast. Shiki suckled at it and took the other one in her hand, feeling its plump softness, admiring its perfect size and shape.


Shiki's other hand was still digging its longer, slender fingers into Rin's slit, but for some reason it suddenly stopped, and Shiki pulled her fingers away entirely. Rin only had moments to wonder about this before Shiki got on her knees and Rin instinctively closed her thighs together, knowing what was going to happen. She was almost afraid of how good this was going to feel, but since she had done exactly this to Shiki, she felt that it was only appropriate.


“Mmmmm- ah, ah! Shikiiii, I w-w-want you to-” Her words were cut off by a tingle that went all the way up and down her spine, making her feel almost numb.


Like a cat, Shiki was licking at Rin's sex; she parted her folds and kissed at Rin's clit, and then dove her tongue inwards. Rin let out a breathy giggle as she understood that Shiki couldn't wait to taste her. Moaning gratefully, she massaged Shiki's shoulders, encouraging her to go deeper, lave at her faster and with more passion.


Shiki did exactly that, kissing Rin just as Rin had kissed her, her rolling tongue plunging into Rin's loosened hole.


The soft, wet sensation down there was just too much to handle, and before she knew it, Rin had gone completely limp, letting out a small, satisfied sigh. Her sexual liquid spilled out for Shiki to greedily lap up, loving every taste she got of it. In her mind she could never have enough of Rin's hot, sticky fluids, and she wants more, more more. Even after Rin had let out all that her body had to offer, Shiki was still kissing at her and licking her, as if to kill her with the sheer pleasure that was sending yet more shivers through Rin's body.


Eventually, though, Shiki had had enough, and sighed.


“Hah, that... that was amazing, Rin.” Said Shiki with a smile, kissing her lover gently on the lips as she complimented her.


Rin giggled. “And... Shiki, wow, I've, I've really never felt like that before!” It was hard for her to say, and it came out awkwardly, but Rin had to say it. She loved everything that Shiki did to her, and it only made her love Shiki even more. This was bliss, she knew.


Having all the time in the world to waste, the two slowly got out of the shower, kissing passionately as they did so, exchanging the tastes of each others liquids. They dried each other off with towels, and then retreated to Shiki's bed, getting the sheets back in order and getting ready to sleep. It had been a long night, and they deserved a rest.


They didn't bother to put on any clothes, still hot from their encounter in the shower. They only needed each others warmth now, and they both slipped under the bedsheets, sleeping together without any awkwardness now. Rin was perfectly fine with sharing a bed with her lover. She wrapped her arms around Shiki, holding her close, feeling her nipples hot on Shiki's bare back.


“I... really love you.” Shiki said, sounding as if she was in some kind of daze.


Rin closed her eyes and smiled. “I love you, too.”

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[Five_X]

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In the morning, they both walked to Touko's office, hand in hand. As if reacting to their happiness, the sky was only partly cloudy today, with the sun shining through down on them. It was a bright and glorious day, and it made Rin want to hold Shiki close to her even more.



Naturally, it was a strange sight to see Shiki active, walking about, but in the depths of the workshop, when Touko saw Shiki smiling and holding hands with Rin... her cigarette fell right from her mouth, and she only absentmindedly thought to put it out.


“What the hell did you do to Shiki?” Asked Touko, levelling an angry glare towards Rin.


Rin just shrugged in response, a bright smile on her face. “I did what I came here to do, Aozaki. I met Shiki after all of these years, and saved her.” Her smile looked somewhat mischievous as she glanced over at Shiki. “Well, really, we helped each other. I'm really glad this happened to us both.”


Still dumbfounded, Touko shook her head as she tried to come to terms with this completely unexpected occurrence. “Eh... so, I guess that means you've got a puppet from me, free of charge. Take good care of it, and send that guy over to me when he needs it, alright?”


“Of course!” Rin nodded, silently gracious at not having to spend any money on this puppet, which was really more of a reward now than something she set out to buy.


“Well, Touko.” Beside Rin, Shiki winked at her old friend. “I think this means I can work with you again now, huh? I'll definitely do whatever you need me to do.”


Touko adjusted her glasses and sighed, smiling wryly at Shiki. “Ah, if you want to, then fine. You've been sitting around for five years, so I guess you owe me something, huh?”


They all shared a laugh, and for the first time in anyone's memory, there was genuine happiness in Touko's workshop.


It was that happiness that so few people shared: a moment of bliss, untouched by any tainted emotions, any obligations or fears. There was a past that they had come to accept behind then, and ahead of them a future that held only promise. With Rin, Shiki knew that she could return to a normal life, even if she didn't become active and energetic as she once was. At the very least, she would learn to enjoy life for what it was, instead of searching for some obscure purpose in life, or trying to fill that void that she once thought was perpetually empty. It was Rin who had saved her from that, and who filled the emptiness of her life with a true purpose. She'd never known love before, but now that she had, she didn't want to ever let it go.

--------------------------------

[Five_X]

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Epilogue ~ May the Moon Shine as Bright...




“Eh?” Shirou scratched his head at the sound of a few knocks on the door, wondering who would be visiting him this early in the morning. Usually only Taiga would come around at this time of the day, drawn in by the smell of Sakura's or Shirou's cooking. Even Rider often slept in at times like this, only to arrive right when dinner was about to be served. The smell of a freshly cooked meal was heavy in the air, and there was no way that Rider would remain silent for long. However, the disturbance at the door was more immediately intriguing to him.


Opening the door, to reveal an almost blindingly sunny day, he saw Rin standing there in her usual clothes, a clever smirk on her face. It at first seemed no different from any other day, when Rin showed up every once and a while to eat breakfast with his family at the Emiya residence.


However, there was one thing that was odd about this scene: there was a brown-haired girl standing next to Rin, wearing a light coloured kimono decorated with decals of vivid red flowers.


Shirou raised an eyebrow. “Huh? Who's this, Tohsaka? Your friend?”


She just smiled, and looked over at Shiki, winking.

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And there you have it! Another yuri love story, brought to you by Five_X!

I hope you all enjoyed it, and you can comment now that I've posted it all up.

And, of course, you're welcome, Leo.

[Spinach]

Jesus Christ.

[Five_X]

Yes, Spinach. I actually did write it all.

I'm kind of insane, yes.

[Techlet]

Gods! My dick is out of control!

[ItsaRandomUsername]

Uber-Epic.

[DreamsRequiem]

First Sion, now Ryougi. Rin is now becoming Five_X's personal porn star, like Archer is to Elf. Cool read though.

[Laith]

This is pretty awesome.