Wishing Machine

[Gaterjhonz]

Alright, since I'm terribly bored and have nothing better to do (Fate/Maharlika's 8th chapter is still not finished and I'm terribly caught on a snag; Fate/Realista is in it's early stages and I'm too damn lazy atm), I'm going to start a new game for all you wonderful people of the 7th.

Rules are simple:

1. Corrupt former wish
2. Make wish
3. ???
4. Profit

Since there's no previous wish to corrupt, I'll just corrupt an imaginary one and make another one for my own.

I wish that I have the best damn eyesight in the entire world

Granted, you manage to procure eyes so perfect that you actually start to see the hidden horrific side of the world, you turn mad because your mind can't accept what you are seeing, and as a way to save yourself and your sanity, you commit suicide.

Get it? Got it? GOOO!

EDIT: here's my wish:
I wish that I won the lottery.

[.It.]

Granted. You won the lottery of gay men. Thousands of them. Thousands. You bathe in them day and night. Forever.

I wish I never had to blink ever.

[SeiKeo]

Enjoy your eyes drying to prunes.

Let's go classic, I wish for hookers and blow.

[Gaterjhonz]

Eesh, that would be very vomit inducing o.o

Granted, a man abducts you, gases you to unconsciousness, then the moment you woke up in an operating bed, he surgically removes your eyelids in a very painful operation, and hey, presto, no more blinking and irritated dry eyes forever.

I wish I am not human.
LE SNIPE

Granted, hookers=painful hand thingies that strip your flesh; blow=a bomb strapped to your head.

I wish i never was born.

[.It.]

Granted. I swatted your unborn soul, birthed you and made you into my child slave. Enjoy the crops.



I wish the sky was violet.

[Gaterjhonz]

Granted, you went to space and was blown up halfway through there, the violet shade that the sky adopted afterwards was your blood mixing in with the atmosphere.

I wish I had a better body.

[.It.]

Granted, You grew swords out of your body.

I wish God didn't exist.

[Keyne]

Granted. Haruhi Suzumiya is no more.

I wish it stopped raining damn it!

[Spinach]

Granted, it stops raining. Forever. Everywhere.

I wish this wish wouldn't be corrupted.

[Keyne]

Denied. There is no God.

I wish we could all frolic in light white clothes on a field of endless green under the blue blue sky, in the embrace of an endless spring.

[Gaterjhonz]

Granted, it never came true instead.

I wish anomalies exist.

[Spinach]

Granted, but you will never interact with them.

I wish Keyne would love Saber forever and ever.

[Keyne]

Granted. Granted.

I wish Spinach would really give inhuman strength.

[Gaterjhonz]

Granted, but his body can't handle it and he dies in an epic splosion of guts and blood

I wish Gen would write a proper love story

[ItsaRandomUsername]

^^
You eat your spinach. But your slightest touches tear things to shreds, and your slightest motions demolish your surroundings. It's not your fault that you're an engine of destruction. ...except that it totally is.

^
FUCK YOU FOR SNIPING ME MAN
FUCK. YOU.

Gen writes a proper love story. But it's so boring and cliche that no one likes it.

Now then:
I wish I had bigger breasts.

[Keyne]

Granted. Your boobs are now double-G's

I wish I had a wish.

[ItsaRandomUsername]

Now that you actually know what you want to wish for you now realize that it can now no longer be granted because you already wasted your wish.

I wish I had more friends than I do now.

[Nacho the Doritosedge]

granted, you now have separate personalities.

I wish I had a live, unharmed and harmless bunny in my bathtub right now.

[Gaterjhonz]

Granted, the bunny drowned after you forgot that the tub is full of water. and the wittke bunny wabbit cant swim.

I wish authors stop bitching about fanfictions.

[Keyne]

Granted. Now they're gaying.

I wish...