Author's Note: Well this is kinda embarrassing, you see this is actually something Leo requested in the dare thread way back in July and I only just got round to finishing it, despite it not being very long at all. Given the wait I hope he (and the rest of you) enjoys it.
Disclaimer: I do not own Fate/Stay Night or Fate/Zero.
Survivor's Comfort
She awoke suddenly but without a start or any sudden movement. Instead her eyes snapped open and she lay perfectly still, staring up through the darkness at the bedroom ceiling. Blind panic and pure fear prevented her from moving.
Sola's breathing was heavy like she had just finished running and she could feel that her body was covered in sweat that was rapidly cooling in the chill, night air. Slowly true awareness began to return to her and her terror began to recede as she recognised where she was. She couldn't remember what her nightmare had been about but she could guess and decided against trying to remember it. After a few moments spent calming herself, her breathing slowly began returning to normal.
Their was a light pressure on her right arm, she didn't need to look to know it was pinned under her still slumbering bed partner. Her left arm ached as it always did after such dreams, even though it shouldn't. She still experienced what they called “phantom pains” often, her mind refusing to accept that part of her was gone forever.
She sighed heavily; there was no way she was going back to sleep now, she never could after one of those dreams.
Slowly, carefully she managed to prise her arm out from underneath the sleeping Irisviel and slipped out of bed. The sweat on her skin made the night feel colder than it really was and she reached for her robe. She pulled it on over her nightgown, slipping one arm through a sleeve and leaving the other to dangle sadly at her side.
She moved towards the bedroom door but froze with her hand on the handle, when she heard Irisviel's voice:
“Ilya...”
She turned to face the sleeping woman and though it was too dark to see properly, she knew there were tears in her eyes. Irisviel had her nightmares as often as Sola had her own, perhaps even more-so. She waited there at the door to see if Irisviel would wake but she made no other sound and was completely still, except for the steady rise and fall of her chest. She breathed a sigh of relief and exited the room.
On her way down the hall she passed the door to the other bedroom. It belonged to a child, the only other person apart from Irisviel, that Sola had been able to pull from the fire.
She moved quickly around the small kitchen, deftly preparing herself some tea. She'd been clumsy at first, with only one hand and had needed Irisviel's help quite a bit. Now after a few months of practice she was able to do most ordinary tasks with almost the same level of skill as before.
And she quite liked performing these ordinary tasks. Before she had lived in a large house and had even had servants, of the regular kind, of course. Yet, she found this existence less oppressive and much more free and she had no intention of giving it up. A gilded cage was still a cage after all.
The kettle finished boiling and she poured the steaming water, in to the teapot rather than the cup, already anticipating the need for more. She already had the second cup waiting on the side.
When her tea was ready she sat at the table and allowed her mind to wander a little, so long as it wandered away from her dreams. Her thoughts were semi-cooperative and instead turned to memories that almost made her squirm in her seat.
The sight of silver hair made brilliant by the moonlight, of pale skin looking almost luminous beneath her. Red eyes that stared at her own nakedness with a mixture of want and embarrassment; and lips just beginning to swell...
She could feel the soft, pliable flesh between her fingers as she massaged her lover's breasts and ran one finger over the peak teasingly. The feel of those lips against her own as she descended on them again almost without thinking, an urgent desire moving her body for her. The pressure as those lips pressed back and a tongue came forward to engage her own only caused her animalistic cravings to grow. She wanted to ravage and to mark her territory.
Just barely she managed to tear herself away from those lips and her mouth made its way down her lover's chin all the way to where her neck met her shoulder. She pressed her lips down hard and nipped lightly, determined to leave her mark.
She heard the other woman squealed below her and grinned to herself.
Her triumph was short lived however as her lover surprised her. She could feel a hand caressing her inner thigh, steady but unsure and making its way agonisingly slowly towards her centre...
Sola forcibly dragged herself from her reverie. If she kept along that line of thought she would need to attend to herself in the bathroom.
Just as she lifted her cup to her lips to take the first sip, she heard a noise coming from her bedroom. Without a word she placed her cup down on the table and went to pour some tea in to the other. Then she brought it back over and set it down on the table, next to one of the other chairs.
Sure enough Irisviel emerged from the room, looking pitiable enough to make Sola's heart clench. She wasn't wearing her robe only her shift. The garment came to her knees but left her arms completely exposed. and was so low cut in the front that it was almost completely distracting. It was just sheer enough to give a tantalising hint of what lay underneath without being indecent.
Sola had to work to keep her mind from returning to its previous musings.
Irisviel moved in to the kitchen and sat at the table, in the seat next to which Sola had left the second cup. She lifted it to her lips and took a small sip.
“Thank you,” she said, send a small smile at Sola.
“You're welcome,” the redhead replied.
They drifted in to a silence that was not uncomfortable, despite the reasons they were both awake. Each drawing a sense of comfort and stability from the other.
Irisviel was in a way representative of the new-found freedom she so valued, Sola mused. Certainly she had never been free to love someone simply because she wanted to before. The marriage to Kayneth had been more or less forced on her, she had not argued against it only because she knew the effort would have been pointless. As for the … infatuation with Lancer, she viewed the memories of that in the third person, almost like it was happening to someone else.
Every magus family would balk at the idea of a relationship built on emotion. And one that couldn't produce children would be unthinkable. Yet this was the first time she had been able to be with someone because she wanted to be.
She heard a sniffle and her eyes refocused to find that Irisviel was sitting hunched over her tea and tears were streaming down her face. Sola was out of her chair immediately, wrapped her remaining arm around her girlfriend and allowed her to cry in to her shoulder.
“I miss her,” Irisviel sobbed. “She must be lonely there without me.”
Sola rubbed her back and muttered comforting words, not sure quite what to say. This was another example of why Sola preferred her new world to her old. When Irisviel had tried to return to her family they she had been treated almost like an intruder. She had failed in her purpose and the Einzbern didn't tolerate faliure, standing there Sola had gotten the feeling that the old man was considering disposing of Irisviel then and there. But what had really broken her lover was that they hadn't even allowed her a glimpse of her daughter. That old bastard had been so very cold and cruel, every word out of his mouth designed to cut deep.
As Irisviel's crying finally began to calm down, Sola did something that went against her better judgement.
“I … I'll try and find a way,” she whispered.
“You promise?” Irisviel sniffled.
“I promise,” Sola confirmed, wondering just how she could live up to that promise. Then after a few more seconds she added; “Let's go back to bed.”
She felt Irisviel nod against her shoulder and stood up. She place her girlfriend's cup in the sink and poured her untouched, now cold tea down the drain before adding hers too. Then she wrapped her arm around Irisviel and helped her back to her feet. Together the two of them made their way back to bed.
Almost an hour later as Sola lay in bed one hand wrapped around her girlfriends waist and hugging her close so that Irisviel's back was pressed against her chest, she began to think. Maybe if she was very, very careful she could try and get in touch with some people, put out some “feelers”. She would have to be exceedingly careful though, she would first have to try to make a list of who (if anyone) she could trust or who she might have some leverage on...
She had been stupid to do it and she still wanted nothing more to do with that world, but she had promised.
As the thoughts ticked away in her head Sola slowly fell back in to the comforting oblivion of sleep.
Fin.
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Originally Posted by Chacho
