Agailius' Fortress of NOBLEBRIGHT (Drabble Thread)

[Agailius]

Okay, dudes, after about a millisecond of consideration, I've decided to post a drabble thread. So far, I plan on posting in here... (Warning, can change at the drop of a hat)

Waver being generally awesome: The Extraordinary Exploits of Lord El-Melloi II

Zel is the Tohsaka ancestor(as hilariously squicky as it sounds): Blood Within the Jewels

Iri and Iskandar hooking up(NOT NTR. Kerry is already dead--see Princess and Her Knight as reference material): The White Princess and the Crimson King

Iri raising EMIYA, Avenger, Shirou, and Ilya: The Chaotic Lives of the Everyday Emiyas

Snippet continuation of: Name Above All Names

[Lycodrake]

Iri and Iskandar hooking up: The White Princess and the Crimson King

NTR is not NOBLEBRIGHT.

[Agailius]

NTR is not NOBLEBRIGHT.

It isn't if Kiritsugu is already dead.

[Lycodrake]

It isn't if Kiritsugu is already dead.

Depends on what caused his death.

[RadiantBeam]

Iri and Iskandar hooking up: The White Princess and the Crimson King

Tell me more about this wonderful idea.

[The Curious Fan]

Iri and Iskandar hooking up(NOT NTR. Kerry is already dead--see Princess and Her Knight as reference material): The White Princess and the Crimson King

And how in the hell did Iri survive the 4th war? And why would she want anything to do with Iskandar in the first place?

[Agailius]

Tell me more about this wonderful idea.

Basically what happened is this: Instead of simply attacking Saber when she pursues him, Iskandar asks she wtf is going on. Discovering that Irisviel has been kidnapped by his apparent Doppleganger, Iskandar opts to join with Saber in order to find Iri/stop Gilly.

While Kirei and Kiritsugu duke it out, the three kings confront each other in the theater, where the Grail awaits. Saber and Iskandar battle Gilly (possibly even vanquishing him), but before anyone can claim the Grail, Kiritsugu approaches it, and, like in Princess and Her Knight, sacrifices himself to bring Iri back. However, for some reason I haven't come up with yet, the Grail goes troll and starts the fire, and at least Iskandar is subjected to Grail Mud. Saber, realizing in horror at the Grail's nature, uses Excalibur to destroy it in the last moment.

Iskandar, bro he is, is able to wade through the mud without losing his sanity, and finds a nekkid Iri amidst the swirling mud, and rescues her. Having gained a body of his own, Iskandar pulls her outta the mud.

Iri, regaining consciousness, realizes what has happened to Kerry, and for a moment despairs. However, when Waver discovers a small boy (Shirou) and neither he nor Iskandar can save him, it gives Iri the resolve to move on and use Avalon (inside her body) to save Shirou's life.

While being hobbogged in Japan, Iskandar helps inspire Iri to live on and find happiness for herself and Kerry, and to not waste her husband's sacrifice. Iri, realizing that she wishes to save her daughter, asks Iskander for help. The King of Conquerors is more than willing, but there's one little problem--he has almost no prana left. So, Iri and he have a prana-transfer, and Iri finds she likes it.

And, yes, people. That means Iskandar is gonna storm Einzbern Castle.

After giving old man Ject... or whatever the hell his name is... a good kick in the nads, Iskandar inspires the remaining Homonculi Maids to follow him. Seeing as there's nothing better to do, they happily comply.

With hordes of treasure and Ilya in tow, they return to Japan and settle down at the Einzbern castle there.

Oh, and expect this dialog:

Shirou: *kick* Oyaji!!
Rider: *punch* Shirou!!
Shirou: *knee to the chin* Oyaji!!
Rider: *cloths liner* Shirou!!

[The Curious Fan]

Kiritsugu approaches it, and, like in Princess and Her Knight, sacrifices himself to bring Iri back. However, for some reason I haven't come up with yet, the Grail goes troll and starts the fire

Wouldn't the Grail just kill humanity if Kiritsugu wished for Irisviel back? Kiritsugu isn't going to make a wish with that cost attached.

After giving old man Ject... or whatever the hell his name is... a good kick in the nads, Iskandar inspires the remaining Homonculi Maids to follow him. Seeing as there's nothing better to do, they happily comply.

Wouldn't they be all dead before Iskandar has any hope of getting near Acht?

it gives Iri the resolve to move on and use Avalon (inside her body) to save Shirou's life.

She doesn't know Kiritsugu put Avalon inside himself IIRC so how could she have it with her?

[Lycodrake]

Shirou: *kick* Oyaji!!
Rider: *punch* Shirou!!
Shirou: *knee to the chin* Oyaji!!
Rider: *cloths liner* Shirou!!

Iskander has B Rank Strength. 40 times what a normal human can do.
Shirou would die.

Not noblebright at all.

[Agailius]

Wouldn't the Grail just kill humanity if Kiritsugu wished for Irisviel back? Kiritsugu isn't going to make a wish with that cost attached.

Hey, it worked in Princess and Knight--why not here? Or, maybe it DOES intend to do that insane damage, but Iskandar kicks it's theoretical ass with his overwhelming ambition, as well as Saber Excaliblasting it to kingdom come.

Wouldn't they be all dead before Iskandar has any hope of getting near Acht?

Meh, good point. Or maybe he just gets curbed so quickly, there are at least a few left.

She doesn't know Kiritsugu put Avalon inside himself IIRC so how could she have it with her?

Kiri gives it to her as he is inside the Grail World thingy.

- - - Updated - - -

Iskander has B Rank Strength. 40 times what a normal human can do.
Shirou would die.

Not noblebright at all.

Okay, finger flicks instead. I was just being funny.

Or maybe Iskandar trains Shirou so well, the kid is able to withstand the blows.

[The Curious Fan]

Hey, it worked in Princess and Knight--why not here?

Didn't that fic just avoid explaining how it happened because there wasn't really an explanation?

Or, maybe it DOES intend to do that insane damage, but Iskandar kicks it's theoretical ass with his overwhelming ambition, as well as Saber Excaliblasting it to kingdom come.

You're already pushing it by making him unaffected by the effects of the mud, giving him the ability to shut down all the world's evil is too much. And Saber smacking the lesser Grail wouldn't really do much if anything to stop it if a wish was made IIRC.

Kiri gives it to her as he is inside the Grail World thingy.

That wasn't Iri, that was AM.

[Agailius]

Didn't that fic just avoid explaining how it happened because there wasn't really an explanation?

Then I'll go with that--I won't bother explaining.

[Lycodrake]

Then I'll go with that--I won't bother explaining.

Then it isn't even "noblebright".
It's only crack.

[Agailius]

Then it isn't even "noblebright".
It's only crack.

*groan* Okay! But I don't know of any way to make this all plausible! Do ya'll?

[Lycodrake]

*groan* Okay! But I don't know of any way to make this all plausible! Do ya'll?

You have Iri go to Angri and back to Iri.
There is no hope.

[nitewind]

Try helping instead of just being insulting lyco.

[Guy]

Waver being generally awesome: The Extraordinary Exploits of Lord El-Melloi II

I'm throwing money at my screen and nothing is happening.

WHY NOTHING IS HAPPENING?

[Agailius]

I'm throwing money at my screen and nothing is happening.

WHY NOTHING IS HAPPENING?

And ya know what's the first thing Imma do?

Shiki and Shirou coming to Waver for tips on how to manage your harems.

[Flere821]

You have Iri go to Angri and back to Iri.
There is no hope.

Sure there is! Like as much hope as you not commenting when something you don't like pops up and expect people to accept your views as divine judgment, that they should feel bad for even suggesting it! Barely existent, but still there... maybe?


Agailius, write what you want. People don't have to like what you write, and you're not obliged to make it suit people's interests if you don't want to. If any readers don't like it, then I/we/they can just leave later on.

[ItsaRandomUsername]

Iskander has B Rank Strength. 40 times what a normal human can do.
Shirou would die.

Not noblebright at all.

Quit being Dumpy Downer McPartypoophur, dudeski. Take the humor for what it is. :V

Why would he hit someone he has no intent on killing in the face with all of his B-rank strength? Did Waver get pasted whenever he slapped him around?

I for one wish to see more of what Eagleman has in store for us.