Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 20 of 22

Thread: Sherbette's Sherbet {oneshot}

  1. #1
    Don't @ me if your fanfic doesn't even have Shirou/Illya shipping k thnx ItsaRandomUsername's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    The Night of Wallachia
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    27,510
    JP Friend Code
    083945095
    US Friend Code
    NA? More like N/A!
    Blog Entries
    42

    Sherbette's Sherbet {oneshot}

    So I ended up promising Reiu that I’d do a thing. Here it is. Sorry for the delay, just in time for summer.


    Disclaimer:
    Red Dragon is the intellectual property of its other respective rights holders. This story is written solely for the purpose of entertainment, and not for any sort of monetary profit. If anything, consider this free advertising.





    Sherbette’s Sherbet


    The pair of eyes that Meryll saw was her own. As always, the mirror that she hung in her quarters reflected back steely D’natian blue. She narrowed her eyes. The Meryll in the mirror did likewise. She breathed in deeply, and the polished glass displayed how her body rose and fell. The purse laden with coins hanging at her side gave a satisfied-sounding full jingle.


    Upon deciding that there was nothing amiss, Meryll left. She closed the door behind her, taking care to lock it up even though there was hardly a point in doing so. She left the mansion’s grounds in secret – Meryll took especial care to not inform her master of her departure.


    For that day, Meryll went to war.



    .

    - ] | [ -

    .



    “500 gold for the cherries.”


    “500 gold?”


    “Aye, sir.”


    “500 gold?”


    “I said ‘aye,’ didn’t I?”


    “Now, look here. I’m aware that it’s out of season. I recognize that importing them from Nil Kamui or wherever in the world that has the weather necessary for the trees to bear fruit is a delicate, expensive process. I understand the need for merchants to meet the profit margin, to stay in the good ol’, cozy black. Don’t you play me for a fool, now. I know my numbers. For costs like that I could acquire horses, man! Horses!


    I am not highborn. These are not a luxurious courtesan. You are not her pimp, whoring her out. These are cherries. These are fruits. Do we both understand the reality of this situation?”


    “Aye. That, we do.”


    “So, then, no more fun-making, and give me something I can work with.”


    “500 gold.”


    “500 gold?! How can you charge so much for-?! …Is this a front for something illegal?”


    “Nnnnnnoooooooo…”


    “Look, I don’t care what sort of unsavory activities you’re covering for – I just want some damn cherries, and you’re the only one who’s selling them!”


    “…400 gold.”


    “You hardly brought that exorbitant price down at all, you dodgy hobknob packrat!”


    Upon hearing the agonized death wail of yet another hapless weekend warrior Meryll gave a silent prayer to the soul that had succumbed to the harsh world of the D’natian street market.


    Yes, the D’natian street market. It was the landscape that saw the rise of the few and the fall of so many, from spinsters, to housewives, to other members of the lower-class citizenry on errands, to fellow servants. This was the battlefield upon which Meryll’s mettle was tested, in which her destiny – and the rest of her afternoon plans – was to be forged.


    Ingredients wouldn’t buy themselves.




    .

    - ] | [ -

    .




    So soon had the first obstacle shown itself. Quests were certainly not all paid vacations and paved roads, and the marketplace was as competitive any, the rapidity with which Meryll’s mission was met with opposition was still impressive. Meryll took cold comfort in the fact that this place had not lost its bite.


    Though Meryll went to war, it was more like a quest that she had embarked upon. Regardless of how it could be described, her experiences in the D’natian street market that day were nothing short of legendary, and as is so true for legends, it was rife with a cast of characters who had impeded or aided the handmaiden on her journey.

    There was a country lad who probably spent as much time assaulting the cows as he did milking them. The real problem with him, the one pertinent to Meryll, was in not knowing sherbet from sorbet. Ignorance is hardly a crime, but–––


    “Between you, me, and everyone in the realm, milk has no place in sherbet.”

    “Sorbet is the dessert with a pure fruit base,” Meryll had replied, “The process of making sherbet, in contrast, is marked by the inclusion of dairy, which leads to a smoother consistency. You’ll never find that creamy texture in sorbet.”


    “Hate to break it to you, ma’am, but them’s the same thing. They’re both regional words for the same sweet cold stuff.”


    –––Not only was he wrong, he was opinionated, and felt the need to foist it onto others. It was an almost fatal error on Meryll’s part, telling him what she intended to use his wares for.


    Even so, she would not let a hayseed like he have his way. Like many heroes of old, Meryll’s wit was not in short supply.


    So Meryll lied.


    A maid’s loyalty to her master surpassed all other obligations. He was not him. This man was just a mere rock on the side of the path that Meryll walked. All she cared about him was the milk he sold. So with a clear, clean conscience, Meryll lied her way out. On this battlefield, she would fight as dirty as it was required of her.


    Long story short, she was able to take away twice as much milk as she needed, for half the price.


    It was an ordeal in its own right, but the true challenge of a D’natian market day laid with the two-headed monster known as Supply and Demand. Take the intensity of a feeding frenzy and couple that with the speed of a packed auctioneer’s house – the competitive greediness that would result from the sum of those parts would merely rival a good D’natian market day. That went double when the crowds drew, money changed hands, and the monster awoke.


    If haggling was dueling, then Meryll had taken on a whole army, and the literal fruits of her labors were the trophies that she had left with. She strolled back to the estate with the poise of a victor, weary but satisfied.


    Meryll spirited herself away to the kitchen to immediately begin work. She left her satchel on the counter for a moment to grab the bowls, knives, and other things she would need to turn the ingredients into a dish.


    “Hey, Meryll, what’s this?”


    Unfortunately, that was all opportunity needed. The avatar of destruction had descended upon that very same kitchen.


    With a curious look on his face, Swallow Cratsvalley proceeded to look through Meryll’s groceries.


    Meryll’s eyes widened as she broke out into a cold sweat. There was nothing to be done now. Nothing to it but to let disaster run its course.


    Who could say for sure what happened first? The jug of milk exploded in Swallow’s hand, and the bag ripped open, fell apart into tiny scraps of cloth. That catalyzed the rest of the chaos that followed. Raspberries, peaches, apricots, and a single lemon tumbled to the floor. Bursting, bruising, being peppered with the shards and dust of glass upon impact. A stick of cinnamon, so hard won, and so pricey, splintered into chunks of dusty bark.


    His curse was as absolute.


    Meryll stood there, in stunned silence, quivering slightly. She wore a thousand-yard stare, and her gaze went from, first, the remains of the would-be sherbet, to Swallow. Just Swallow. He soon realized that he had done something wrong. Very wrong.


    “Um,” Swallow said, “Sorry Meryll. My curiosity got the better of me. I saw that you went shopping, so I wanted to see what you’d get for yourself.”


    “Me? You think this was for me?” Meryll asked, her visage stony and unchanged.


    “You bought it, so…” Swallow trailed off apologetically as he deferentially shrugged his shoulders.


    With an utterly disapproving expression, all Meryll had to say was “You’re a piece of trash, Master Swallow.”



    .

    - ] | [ -

    .




    “Hey, Meryll?” Sometime later Swallow asked, “Why did you slip under my door a compiled list of all the edible plants that can be found on the Cratsvalley estate’s grounds?”


    “It’s so you don’t starve tonight.”


    “Oho! You can eat dandelions? How amazing!” Swallow said as his face beamed with wonder. “You’re so smart, Meryll!”


    At that moment, Meryll felt as is some spackle had been plastered over the crack in her heart.


    It wasn’t much, but she’d take it.
    Last edited by ItsaRandomUsername; July 15th, 2015 at 06:30 PM.
    McJon01: We all know that the real reason Archer would lose to Rider is because the events of his own Holy Grail War left him with a particular weakness toward "older sister" types.
    My Fanfics. Read 'em. Or not.



  2. #2
    The Long-Forgotten Sight Rafflesiac's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    40,104
    JP Friend Code
    Shoot me a PM
    Blog Entries
    16
    Well, that was hilarious.

    Swallow, you dumbass. You could've eaten big.
    Quote Originally Posted by Arashi_Leonhart View Post
    canon finish apo vol 3

  3. #3
    Don't @ me if your fanfic doesn't even have Shirou/Illya shipping k thnx ItsaRandomUsername's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    The Night of Wallachia
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    27,510
    JP Friend Code
    083945095
    US Friend Code
    NA? More like N/A!
    Blog Entries
    42
    Silver lining? No brain freeze.

    Wait, penguins can't get brain freeze.
    McJon01: We all know that the real reason Archer would lose to Rider is because the events of his own Holy Grail War left him with a particular weakness toward "older sister" types.
    My Fanfics. Read 'em. Or not.



  4. #4
    The master and servant dynamic between these two is hilarious! Good job, the world needs more Red Dragon haha. His curse is one heck of a thing to mange.

    Now adays doesn't Swallow usually wear shackles or something to prevent such mishaps? Or was that just some concept art I misremembered.
    Go check out some awesome fan fiction!
    http://forums.nrvnqsr.com/forumdisplay.php/5-Fanfics
    http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.ph.../FateStayNight
    Because the remaining ten percent is worth dieing for.

    Fortissimo EXA//Akkord:Bsusvier, Magi locked in a deadly battle royal. Sounds familiar right? Familiar and AWESOME.
    http://forums.nrvnqsr.com/showthread...eo-Walkthrough

  5. #5
    The Long-Forgotten Sight Rafflesiac's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    40,104
    JP Friend Code
    Shoot me a PM
    Blog Entries
    16
    He wore them as a kid.
    Quote Originally Posted by Arashi_Leonhart View Post
    canon finish apo vol 3

  6. #6
    Heh, sounds like he still needs em!

    Isn't there also a funny story around Meryll's creation? Like Nasu rolled this thing that said "Bought a slave" and he was like "Oic, that means I can haz meido right?" and the GM went with it.
    Go check out some awesome fan fiction!
    http://forums.nrvnqsr.com/forumdisplay.php/5-Fanfics
    http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.ph.../FateStayNight
    Because the remaining ten percent is worth dieing for.

    Fortissimo EXA//Akkord:Bsusvier, Magi locked in a deadly battle royal. Sounds familiar right? Familiar and AWESOME.
    http://forums.nrvnqsr.com/showthread...eo-Walkthrough

  7. #7
      Reiu's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Age
    27
    Posts
    3,400
    Blog Entries
    14
    Bravo, IRUn. I liked the way you wrote both of them, very much in-character.

    Quote Originally Posted by ItsaRandomUsername View Post
    Silver lining? No brain freeze.

    Wait, penguins can't get brain freeze.
    I thought he was a peacock!

  8. #8
    Don't @ me if your fanfic doesn't even have Shirou/Illya shipping k thnx ItsaRandomUsername's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    The Night of Wallachia
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    27,510
    JP Friend Code
    083945095
    US Friend Code
    NA? More like N/A!
    Blog Entries
    42
    Quote Originally Posted by Reiu View Post
    I thought he was a peacock!
    He's amazing, that's what he is.
    McJon01: We all know that the real reason Archer would lose to Rider is because the events of his own Holy Grail War left him with a particular weakness toward "older sister" types.
    My Fanfics. Read 'em. Or not.



  9. #9
    ジュカイン Lycodrake's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Age
    32
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    27,634
    Blog Entries
    24
    And here I thought there was going to be a lemon.
    But instead we get Meryll calling Swallow trash. I can't complain.
    Quote Originally Posted by Seika View Post
    Yes, excellent. Go, Lyco, my proxy.
    F/GO SUPPORT

  10. #10
    nicht mitmachen Dullahan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    AUSTRALIAAARGGH
    Posts
    5,441
    Blog Entries
    1
    Quote Originally Posted by Lycodrake View Post
    And here I thought there was going to be a lemon.
    Here you go.

    かん
    ぎゅう
    じゅう
    とう

    Expresses the exceeding size of one's library.
    Books are extremely many, loaded on an oxcart the ox will sweat.
    At home piled to the ridgepole of the house, from this meaning.
    Read out as 「Ushi ni ase shi, munagi ni mitsu.」
    Source: 柳宗元「其為書,處則充棟宇,出則汗牛馬。」— Tang Dynasty


  11. #11
    ジュカイン Lycodrake's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Age
    32
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    27,634
    Blog Entries
    24
    Silly Dullahan, that's more than one lemon. :V
    Quote Originally Posted by Seika View Post
    Yes, excellent. Go, Lyco, my proxy.
    F/GO SUPPORT

  12. #12
    nicht mitmachen Dullahan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    AUSTRALIAAARGGH
    Posts
    5,441
    Blog Entries
    1
    you see it's funny because those confectionaries are known by the name of 'sherbet lemons'

    geddit
    かん
    ぎゅう
    じゅう
    とう

    Expresses the exceeding size of one's library.
    Books are extremely many, loaded on an oxcart the ox will sweat.
    At home piled to the ridgepole of the house, from this meaning.
    Read out as 「Ushi ni ase shi, munagi ni mitsu.」
    Source: 柳宗元「其為書,處則充棟宇,出則汗牛馬。」— Tang Dynasty


  13. #13
    Banned
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Location
    Søborg, Copenhagen
    Age
    29
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    18,788
    Blog Entries
    17
    This is some good shit yo.

  14. #14
    ジュカイン Lycodrake's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Age
    32
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    27,634
    Blog Entries
    24
    Quote Originally Posted by Dullahan View Post
    you see it's funny because those confectionaries are known by the name of 'sherbet lemons'
    geddit
    got it, yup
    Quote Originally Posted by Seika View Post
    Yes, excellent. Go, Lyco, my proxy.
    F/GO SUPPORT

  15. #15
    Don't @ me if your fanfic doesn't even have Shirou/Illya shipping k thnx ItsaRandomUsername's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    The Night of Wallachia
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    27,510
    JP Friend Code
    083945095
    US Friend Code
    NA? More like N/A!
    Blog Entries
    42
    Quote Originally Posted by Dullahan View Post
    you see it's funny because those confectionaries are known by the name of 'sherbet lemons'

    geddit
    You're magical, you know that?
    McJon01: We all know that the real reason Archer would lose to Rider is because the events of his own Holy Grail War left him with a particular weakness toward "older sister" types.
    My Fanfics. Read 'em. Or not.



  16. #16
    Banned
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Location
    Søborg, Copenhagen
    Age
    29
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    18,788
    Blog Entries
    17
    but yeah dont even pretend like actual lemon isnt a good idea.

    femLou/Swallow when

  17. #17
    Don't @ me if your fanfic doesn't even have Shirou/Illya shipping k thnx ItsaRandomUsername's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    The Night of Wallachia
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    27,510
    JP Friend Code
    083945095
    US Friend Code
    NA? More like N/A!
    Blog Entries
    42
    Quote Originally Posted by Lycodrake View Post
    And here I thought there was going to be a lemon.
    But instead we get Meryll calling Swallow trash. I can't complain.
    I have a condition that makes me unable to write fanfiction erotica unless I put in hefty amounts of meticulous research on the characterization of the parties involved in the coitus that only I care about.

    Quote Originally Posted by Christemo View Post
    but yeah dont even pretend like actual lemon isnt a good idea.

    femLou/Swallow when
    Maybe after the inevitable disappointment that will be Chaos Dragon.
    Last edited by ItsaRandomUsername; June 17th, 2015 at 11:46 AM.
    McJon01: We all know that the real reason Archer would lose to Rider is because the events of his own Holy Grail War left him with a particular weakness toward "older sister" types.
    My Fanfics. Read 'em. Or not.



  18. #18
    Banned
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Location
    Søborg, Copenhagen
    Age
    29
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    18,788
    Blog Entries
    17
    Chaos Dragon cant be disappointing entirely when it has femLou

  19. #19
    ジュカイン Lycodrake's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Age
    32
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    27,634
    Blog Entries
    24
    Quote Originally Posted by ItsaRandomUsername View Post
    I have a condition that makes me unable to write fanfiction erotica unless I put in hefty amounts of meticulous research on the characterization of the parties involved in the coitus that only I care about.
    That and there's no albino girl in Red/Chaos Dragon that pings your interest like Illya does.
    Quote Originally Posted by Seika View Post
    Yes, excellent. Go, Lyco, my proxy.
    F/GO SUPPORT

  20. #20
    Don't @ me if your fanfic doesn't even have Shirou/Illya shipping k thnx ItsaRandomUsername's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    The Night of Wallachia
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    27,510
    JP Friend Code
    083945095
    US Friend Code
    NA? More like N/A!
    Blog Entries
    42
    Quote Originally Posted by Christemo View Post
    Chaos Dragon cant be disappointing entirely when it has femLou
    She and Sword-Gil together should be a winning combination, hopefully.

    Quote Originally Posted by Lycodrake View Post
    That and there's no albino girl in Red/Chaos Dragon
    From a purely technical standpoint the queen of Huang'lan and Girlobuchi fit this parameter, though.
    Last edited by ItsaRandomUsername; July 15th, 2015 at 06:29 PM.
    McJon01: We all know that the real reason Archer would lose to Rider is because the events of his own Holy Grail War left him with a particular weakness toward "older sister" types.
    My Fanfics. Read 'em. Or not.



Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •