SURPRISE!
I felt like doing this to:
1. Get myself back into playing this game that I've ignored for months
2. Give the non-Japanese-readers on the board a chance to at least follow along with the game's story (without me having to commit to making a full translation)
3. Hopefully entertain
I'm not sure how much interactivity there'll be here since most of the dialogue choices only change a couple lines and aren't worth interrupting the LP for, but I'll at least leave the three major decisions up to you guys (that being our MC's gender/name, our Servant, and our heroine).
Also, there are rules
1. Stay on-topic
2. I'd like to avoid spoilers for parts we haven't gotten to yet. Call Servants by their class names instead of their real names, use spoiler tags for "SO-AND-SO DIES" type stuff, that sort of thing.
Table of Contents
Prologue
Week 1: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6
Week 2: Coming soon?
Now onward, friends, INTO THE SEA OF ELECTRONS
We're playing Normal Mode, because we're not WUSSES >:(
This story is fiction. The moon is not really a computer. Do not attempt to hack the moon.
Our story begins with an ordinary guy arriving for a day at school at Tsukimihara Academy. The game does not give him a name, but I have to call him something, so we shall call him Timmy. Hello, Timmy!
At the school gate, Timmy gets molested, I mean inspected, by his friend, the student council president, who declares him a model student and tells him to head to his classroom.
We can wander around the school a bit, but most places are closed off and everyone we run into just insists Timmy should go to the classroom on the second floor, so we might as well.
0.segment / L.the.L
3 days remaining
That's the name of this chapter. No, I have no idea what "L the L" means. Loop-the-loop, maybe?
Upon entering the classroom, Timmy encounters his friend Matou Shinji, surrounded by girls.
Shinji: Hm? What, when did you get here? Sorry, you're so plain I didn't notice you.
Shinji: We've been friends since, let's see-- ah, first year, was it.
Shinji: Well, there's no need to worry about it though, is there?
Shinji: Anyone would look boring next to someone so gifted!
As you can see, they are bestest friends :D Anyway, Shinji is helping the girls with their math, but when one of them points out that he's gotten something wrong he flips out on her because HE IS NEVER WRONG SO CLEARLY SHE IS THE WRONG ONE AND ALSO STUPID!!!11 The girls run off in terror. What a ladies' man. He tells Timmy he likes him because Timmy knows his place and doesn't get in his way. All my friends in high school were like this ;_;
Timmy is a bit put off by Shinji's attitude and tries to think back to why they became friends to begin with, but he's interrupted by the arrival of their homeroom teacher.
Who promptly faceplants. She's not even running into the room, she just walks in and then goes flying through the air. Who even knows. They don't have to chant "tiger" to get her to wake up though, because she leaps to her feet as though nothing happened. Seems this happens on a daily basis.
Taiga gives a lesson on a famous doctor named Twice, with some "as you know" dialogue to inform us that almost all diseases can be easily cured these days with nanotechnology, not like when she was young and outbreaks were still a concern. She then insists that she's still young and that that will be on the test. Heh.
After class, Shinji calls Timmy boring some more, then mentions for the player's benefit that Timmy is in the newspaper club before wandering off somewhere. There's a guy in the classroom with a "…" bubble over his head, meaning he has something important to say. The guy tells us that the newspaper club director is looking for Timmy, so we're off to find her. She turns out to be in the 2nd floor hallway near the classroom.
These girls don't look familiar at all!
Anyway, according to the director, Timmy is the newspaper club's ace and his task is to investigate "Tsukimihara's Bizarre Spots". Bizarre Spot number one is "the entrance to the spirit world". Apparently some kid was cleaning the archery dojo, but disappeared, supposedly into the spirit world. Okay. The director tells Timmy to investigate because it's not like she's s-scared of ghosts or anything.
By the way, Timmy doesn't have a curry-loving senpai.
Timmy heads downstairs. He's about to go outside towards the dojo, but he notices someone coming out of the supply room. The door opens and reveals a very threatening--
--pfffffffffffAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA! I'm sorry, I can't pretend this guy is intimidating. Look at that coat, LOOK AT THAT COAT! Timmy is scared though, and feels a killing intent from the fabulous-coated man. In the end though, the guy just tells Timmy that students are forbidden to enter the supply room, and introduces himself as Kuzuki, a teacher. You are totally free to imagine FSN's Kuzuki in that coat now.
Well, after that weird encounter, let's wander around the first floor some more. Lordy lordy, look who's over there!
Timmy eavesdrops on Shinji, who is telling off his sister Sakura for skipping archery practice to go help out at someone's house. Sakura wants to know why everyone can't just help each other ;_; but Shinji says fuck that shit.
Well, that doesn't concern Timmy. TO THE DOJO! (Incidentally, I believe this is the only time in the game that the archery dojo will ever be relevant to anything, so if you don't care about the dialogue of the one NPC who hangs out there you will never need to come back.)
Encountering Taiga at the dojo, Timmy learns that she has told the students to go home and study for the upcoming exams, so she has been staying behind to clean the dojo instead of them. They didn't disappear, they just went home. Well that's a pretty lame mystery. Timmy decides he'll tell the director tomorrow, and goes home, ending the day.
*
2 days remaining
Timmy arrives in class the next day, to find that Shinji isn't surrounded by the usual girls and seems to be in a bad mood. When asked what's wrong, Shinji insists it's nothing, and then totally changes the subject to how Tohsaka Rin is a huge bitch who punches people who ask her out. Well, I guess nothing happened then!
Also, Taiga falls again.
Although Kuzuki is supposed to be the math teacher, he tells the class about wars and terrorism. Okay. This school has the shortest classes ever, so that's over with. Before the class leaves, he tells them to go home quickly since there are rumours of a killer on the streets. Timmy can't, though, because he has to investigate deep mysteries, like kids going home to study instead of cleaning the dojo. To the director!
Upon leaving the classroom, Timmy overhears a group of girls gossiping about how great Tohsaka Rin is. I'm sure she won't be important to the story at all.
Timmy tells the director about what he learned yesterday, and she declares that case closed. The next Bizarre Spot is the rooftop, where a mysterious woman in red has been sighted.
Before heading to the rooftop, we might as well explore a bit. On the first floor, Shinji is messing around with the door to the garden and wondering why it won't open. When Timmy asks what's up, he gets mad and says that even if Timmy hasn't noticed yet, he's already-- then cuts himself off and tells Timmy to go home. BFFs for life
On the third floor, Issei informs us that the lady in red will probably be up on the roof, so off we go!
And here she is.???: A beautiful sunset---
???: That's what the people here probably see this as now.
???: It certainly is a beautiful sight. But there's no life in it.
???: A flattering world. A tedious promised tranquility. A future that does nothing but run out.
???: This place is a complete caricature. A cartoon in bad taste.
???: What's the point of memories that you only see and then leave behind?
She then notices Timmy.
???: Oh, a warning from the system side [student council]? Thanks for your effort.
???: Eh, that's not it? Then an NPC [ordinary student]?
???: To think an unrelated NPC would show up here …Then, maybe this place was a mistake after all.
???: Well, whatever. Nobody's looking, and this is a good chance to test it out. Hey you, don't move.
She starts touching his face, but then suddenly there's a flash and some static.???: …Wait, what's this?!
???: A block from the system side? I see, so that means physical interference is against the preliminary regulations.
She then proceeds to DISAPPEAR INTO THIN AIR OMG!!!1111
Timmy is shocked, but then Issei comes up and tells him to go home so he does. Timmy gets over these things pretty quickly.
*
1 day remaining
Back to the classroom again. It's storytime with Shinji!Shinji: So I told him. "I feel sorry for you, but you have no talent, so just leave it at that."
Shinji: And what do you think his answer was?
Female student: Ehhh~? What, what? What did he say?
Female student: I want to kno~w. Tell us.
Shinji: He said this in a tearful voice:
Shinji: "If I try hard, I'll get better. Someday, I'll show you that I'll be able to shoot better than Shinji-senpai who skips practise all the time…"
Shinji: That's what he said. Sorry to say it, but I laughed. To think he actually believed that an ordinary person could catch up to a genius through effort!
Shinji: He should just outgrow that idea.
Shinji: His problem isn't that he's ordinary, it's that he doesn't know when to give up!
Shinji: Ahaha, whaaat an idiot. Why doesn't he understand that people have a natural difference in position…
Shinji: …that there's an unsurmountable wall when it comes to talent!
Female student: Matou-kun is good even without having to practice, after all. I feel sorry for that kid~
Shinji: Yeah, didn't I say I felt sorry for him? Well, I pity him for how he can't have any hope for the future unless he dreams like that.
During class, Timmy reflects on Shinji's words. Leaving aside the question of whether Shinji is a genius, Timmy considers himself an ordinary person and doesn't have any particular hope for the future. He wonders if his ordinary life will continue forever without anything interesting happening.
But just as he thinks that, something amazing happens… Taiga enters the room and DOESN'T FALL OVER!
Oh and she brought a transfer student. He's pretty!Taiga: Now, Leo-kun. Introduce yourself.
Leo: …Why must I do that?
Taiga: Eh? "Why"…?
Taiga: You're going to be classmates starting today, so shouldn't you introduce yourself?
Leo: …Ahh, I see. These people do not yet know my name, right?
Leo: Everyone, my name is Leonardo Bistario Harway*.
*(I'm just going to say I have no idea about how to romanize any of this kid's three names (well "Leonardo" is probably right). Thankfully we can just call him Leo, but the last name is going to get repeated a lot, so don't take my word for "Harway" being correct.)Leo: Everyone in this world knows of me, but now I am your schoolmate. I am happy for this good fortune.
Leo: Well then, everyone, I hope we get along well for this short while.
Everyone is pretty much stunned by this kid, who according to some random guy in the hall is the heir to this family that pretty much runs the world. Timmy thinks back to what Shinji said about natural differences in position (though I get the feeling Shinji did not intend it to apply to people other than himself…)Taiga: Ahhh… errr…
Taiga: Anyway, everyone, get along with Leo-kun, okay? Well then Leo-kun, your seat is…
Taiga: The second from the left, third from the front is unoccupied. Is that okay?
Leo: …Leo-kun…? Ah, you must mean me.
Leo: Yes. I do not mind. You are a straightforward person, Sensei. There was no sense of discomfort in you calling me Leo.
Leo: It makes me wish for you to come to my country if you have the opportunity. I find you very charming, Fujimura-sensei.
Taiga: U-ueh?! H-h-h, hey, don't make fun of your teacheeeer!
Taiga: Leo-kun, hurry up and sit down! But that made me happy, so I'll spare you from my fists.
Leo: Yes. Thank you for your concern, Sensei.
OH LORD HE'S HITTING ON TIGER
Everyone is amused, though Shinji announces he doesn't like Leo. Leo looks over in their direction, but Timmy somehow gets the feeling that Leo's not looking at Shinji, but at him. He can't understand why someone as boring as himself could draw Leo's attention. Timmy you are such a loser.
See anyone interesting in this shot?
Timmy goes to tell the director about his encounter with the girl in red. He tells her the girl disappeared before his eyes, and she says "oh well". This weirds Timmy out immensely, since normally she'd call him a liar and accuse him of trying to scare her, but she's just calmly accepting that a person disappeared into thin air. She blithely goes on about the next Bizarre Spot, the church in the garden. Even though the school isn't a missionary school, there's a church right next to it, which attracts all kinds of rumours, so we're off to investigate. But first, more school exploration.
Down the hallway on the second floor, we see Leo talking to Kuzuki. Kuzuki tells Leo about how "30% of the participants have shed the roles prepared by the system side" and "regained knowledge of who they are". He also warns him of Tohsaka Rin having high skill as a "Wizard". He also mentions alchemist assassins. This shit is wack yo. Leo completes this weirdness by calling Kuzuki "Brother". I could have translated this whole part, but it's so looooooong.
Never mind that Timmy, they're probably just discussing their D&D campaign. On to the third floor! There's a random guy with the "…" over his head, so let's see what he's after. Seems he's got some information on one of the school's seven mysteries, "the roaming ghost girl". There's a ghost of a little foreign girl roaming the third floor hallway, and if you talk to her she'll suck out your soul. Dammit, this is way better than the mysteries the director stuck me with! He's too scared, so he asks Timmy to check it out for him. OFF WE GOOO
o-oh god what is that
Timmy feels a presence behind him OH NO WHAT HAVE I DONE
We get a choice about whether or not to turn around. I'm sure nothing will be there if we choose to turn around, let's just get it over with…
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA…www, cute! She is indeed a bit ghostly though and Timmy is creeped out. She disappears, but he's gotten pretty used to that now.
THE MYSTERY OF SHINJI'S STRANGE OBSESSION WITH DOORS
But enough of this. To the church!
What a nice garden, look at all the pretty flow…er…s… oh shit…
kuzuki what
Kuzuki notices Timmy, who suddenly feels a blow as though he's been attacked by something invisible and falls to the ground. Next thing he knows, Kuzuki and the corpses are gone. He goes home. Is that what you do every time something inexplicable happens Timmy, Jesus.
*
0 days remaining
Yet again we open on the classroom, but this time we're focused on Leo's desk. The usual girls who hang around Shinji are crowded around Leo. He's helping them with their math, but in a much more caring manner than a certain other person. Shinji is watching this, complaining that the girls have no pride getting help from a kid and saying that Leo should know his place. Leo overhears this and turns to face Shinji, who is freaked out, and Leo... sincerely apologizes for upsetting Shinji. Leo's gonna love and tolerate the shit outta you. Shinji takes this as Leo admitting his inferiority, yeah okay then Shinji.
ho-hum
Taiga then gives a lesson on amnesia syndrome. Apparently this Twice guy came up with a vaccine to cure it. Is that even possible? She then says that while people used to use it as an excuse when she was young, it's been cured so they can't try that. Also that she is still young and it will be on the test for reals.
Suddenly, Leo stands up.
Leo: Fujimura-sensei.
Leo: …And everyone.
Leo: I must be going soon. We may never meet again, but farewell.
Leo: …Ah. There is one more thing I forgot to say. I think you are still young, Fujimura-sensei.
Leo: I am reminded of youth just with you being there. You really were the type of person who is hard to come by.
He then leaves. Shinji comments that if Leo wants to go to the toilet he shouldn't make such a big show out of it. I don't know, when I go to the bathroom I always announce to everyone present that they may never see me again. Anyway nobody thinks it's weird that Leo just left in the middle of class.
All this weirdness is giving Timmy a massive headache that makes him feel like he's seeing static everywhere. It's so bad that he feels he's going to forget who he is. He then realizes he has forgotten who he is. What. He doesn't remember his name, age, where he lives, his family, where he was before he came to this school, etc. Panicking, he thinks the director should at least know his name, so he goes to find her.
She doesn't tell him, and instead tells him to check the name registry in the library. (You don't have to, your name is Timmy.)
Going to the library, he discovers that the pages of the registry are all blank, as are the pages of the previous year's. Now it's time to explore the school and watch everyone completely lose their shit!
On the third floor, there are question marks down both hallways. First I choose… right! Timmy looks out the window into the garden and sees a mysterious girl standing with her eyes closed.
When she opens her eyes there's a sudden blast that shakes the school building, but when he opens his eyes again nothing has changed, except that the girl is now inside the building standing near him.
???: I had assumed that contact would have destroyed it. ……But this place is strong.
She then gives a little bow and walks off. Okay whatever.
And in the other third-floor hallway! Let's talk to the ghost girl. Soul-sucking would be less weird than everything else that's going on right now.
???: ……….Um…
???: Onii-chan… are you not afraid of me?
???: Maybe... you came to see me?
???: If that's true…
???: I'm… Alice.
???: I'm… always here, so…
Then she just goes silent and stands there. If you talk to her after that
Alice: Let's have a tea party together some time, Onii-chan.
After my last playthrough I don't want to hear that from you. Oops no spoilers.
Still got your soul, Timmy? Okay, then time to go downstairs! We can see Leo, but for now, let's go the other way. Down the other hallway, uh… this happens.Shinji: Sakura!
Sakura: Ah… Nii, san.
Shinji: You skipped morning archery practice again today! What's the meaning of this?!
Sakura: I'm sorry, Nii-san. But I…
Shinji: You're disgracing me again! Got it? How many times do I have to tell you, Sakura.
Shinji: Instead of always worrying about other people, do as I… no, no, wait. Wait, wait wait wait…
Shinji: ……………………………………………………..
Shinji: Little sister…?
Shinji: I don't… have a little sister, do I? I wanted one, but I didn't have one!
Shinji: Somehow, lately…?? G-guh??!
Shinji: Gah… w-w-what is this?! This weird feeling…!!
Sakura: Ah. Nii-san, you must, be tired. I'm sorry, Nii-san. I'mrry, Niian. I made a mistake.
Sakura: Now, calm down, Nii-san. Please calm down, Onii-sama. Let's calm down, Shinji-san.
Sakura: Now, which is, your little sister ?
Sakura: If you don't hurry, you'll be in trouble, you know? Because it's, impossible, for Ninini, Nii-san, anyway.
Sakura: So, lose your mind, more. Now, calm down, cALm doWN. CALM DOWN, Nii-sasasasasasasa
Shinji: Hii! Hiii… w-w-what is this! Shit, this is really weird!
Shinji runs off in terror and I don't blame him. Jesus.Sakura: Nii-san, wait. WAIT NII-SANNNNNN.
If you talk to her after
Sakura: Ah. Nii-san, you must, be tired. I'm sorry, Nii-san. I'mrry, Niian. I made a mistake.
…SHINJIIIIII! WAIT FOR MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Anyway at this point Timmy is freaking the fuck out and knows there's something seriously wrong with this world. He sees Leo going down the hallway and follows after him, wondering why he's headed down a hallway that just ends at a blank wall.Leo: It really is well-made. Not just the detail, but even the atmosphere is realistic.
Leo: In fact, it seems more real than reality.
Leo: Hey… what do you two think?
Timmy freaks out that Leo has noticed him. I think someone has a CRUUUUUSH.Leo: Hello. This is the first time we have spoken like this, isn't it.
Leo: Living here was not bad. Though I had known about them, it was my first time coming to a school.
Leo: In that sense, it was quite an interesting experience.
Leo: …But that ends now. This place is not where I should be.
Leo: You cannot drop in at a place forever, after all. The time eventually comes when you must return to the real path.
Leo: That time is now…
Leo: Goodbye.
Leo: ----No, that is wrong, isn't it. It's a mistake to say farewell.
Leo: I have no reason to now, but I get the feeling I will be meeting you again.
Leo: So I should be saying "until we meet again" here.
Leo: Well then, I will go on ahead. Good luck to the both of you.
He then disappears through the wall oh my god you guys.
Timmy decides that the truth of what the hell is going on must be behind that wall, so he decides to face the truth and follow Leo through… (by the way, the first time I played the game it somehow didn't occur to me that I could go through the wall too, so I wandered around and finally decided to just go out the school gate, which led to a game over. Yes, I died at the absolute earliest possible point in the game.)
On the other side of the wall is a weird room with bubbles coming out of nowhere. Okay. There's also a large doll standing in the corner. He is greeted by a mystery voice:???: Welcome, new Master candidate.
???: This is the doll that will become your sword and shield from now on. If you command it, it will obey.
???: Now, proceed. The truth that you seek is ahead.
And so, Timmy and Doll-san proceed to a large room with huge stained-glass windows. On the floor he sees a student's dead body, with a similar doll next to it. Suddenly the doll stands up and attacks. Timmy's doll tries to fight back, but loses. DOLL-SAN, NOOOO!
???: Hmm, so you were no good either.
As Timmy loses consciousness, he feels regret that to the very end, he couldn't remember who he really was, and wishes for someone to remember his name.
But more than that… what he regrets the very most, is that the last thing he saw at his moment of death… was a really lame OP video.
Good-night, sweet Timmy, and Ali Project sing thee to thy rest.
TO BE CONTINUED...
**************************************
Questions, comments, concerns, complaints, queries, correlations, tribulations, contusions, lacerations, obsessions, compulsions?
There are three decisions to be made at this point. The power is yours!
1. Servant: Saber, Archer, or Caster?
2. Protagonist's gender: boy or girl?
3. Protagonist's name: Since there's a million possibilities, just throw out suggestions and I'll use the one I like best. We need a last name, first name and a nickname (though I'm not sure where in the game the nickname is even used, to be honest).