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Thread: Create-A-Servant 2

  1. #3501
    Tranquilo, Japones, Tranquilo JetKinen's Avatar
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    Do you play GO Gally?

    When you reach maximum bond level with your servant you get a Craft Esssence(Mystic Code Nonsense) detailing something about his life.
    Amakusa gets his banner when he was being a rebel; Beowulf gets something depicting his final battle against the Dragon; Fergus gets his super aphrodisiac and so on.
    Besides gameplay bonuses, they also come with some lore bits to them, sometimes written in first person and shit like that

    I suspect here, it's just a way to talk more about other aspects of the Servant that wouldn't normally fall under the sheet.

    Fate Grand/Order ID: 102947414/GreenBob
    JetKinen's tries very poorly to translate a brazilian book

  2. #3502
    It's All Good! 4score7years's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JetKinen View Post
    I suspect here, it's just a way to talk more about other aspects of the Servant that wouldn't normally fall under the sheet.
    Plus also as a way to show how the Servant talks/give you a better sense of personality.

  3. #3503
    死徒二十七祖 The Twenty Seven Dead Apostle Ancestors Bird of Hermes's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 4score7years View Post
    Plus also as a way to show how the Servant talks/give you a better sense of personality.
    I've only done them for Sargon and my latest Ruler a page back but it's true - it does the "show don't tell" rule. The vast majority of them aren't first person (yet it's all I've done myself so far)

  4. #3504
    Totally not Eldritch WhatShouldNotBe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MehKitteh View Post
    Okay, maaaaaaybe I was watching Haiyore! Nyarko-san too much...
    ya think????

    Quote Originally Posted by 4score7years View Post
    Hey, by the way, Mr. "Totally-Not-Eldritch," have you actually made anything eldtritch-y?

    Then again I still haven't made Lincoln yet so...
    No...

    but I wil!
    Quote Originally Posted by RoydGolden View Post
    He nearly wins before his "host body" (who'd be a sympathetic secondary character or even one of the main heroes for maximum drama) manages to break free of his control for a moment and stabs/otherwise severely wounds themselves to give the heroes enough time to blast him again.

    .
    *sakura flashbacks*


    Quote Originally Posted by 4score7years View Post
    Plus also as a way to show how the Servant talks/give you a better sense of personality.
    plus, a great way to make your servant more of a Person, than just a Legend. A good craft essence would be something like a childhood memento, which reminds them of happier times, or something like that. A Craft Essence for say, Einstein, would be his wife's wedding ring.

  5. #3505
    Totally not Eldritch WhatShouldNotBe's Avatar
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    True Name: J. Robert Oppenheimer
    Class: Avenger
    Alignment: Lawful Neutral
    Parameters:
    Strength: E
    Agility: E
    Endurance: E
    Magic: C
    Luck: C
    Noble Phantasm: EX
    Personality

    likes: Science
    dislikes: War, Technological murder
    Rather interestingly for an Avenger, Oppenheimer so peaceful soul, more in terested in advancing science than making angst or being edgy. However, he built the atomic bombs in an attempt to stop a war, and watching them only make things worse, regrets them deeply. His greatest wish would be undoing the work put into the Atomic Bomb.

    Skills
    ClassSkills:
    Avenger: (C)
    At this rank, he is capable of holding all the grudges and fears of Nuclear Annihilation, the evil which he birthed and set loose into the world. This skill represents both his greatest triumph and his greatest sin in this respect. Heroes who were said to have utilized some form of ‘super weapon’, such as Brahmastra, Excalibur, Enuma Elish, and other such supremely destructive weapons, will find their weapons receive a Rank-Down in effectiveness against him, and he will be able to recognize said superweapons instantly. Superweapons know their kin.
    Oblivion Correction: (C-)
    This skill denotes the restraints put upon the Avenger class to ensure they obey their Master. It functions in Oppenheimer by sapping his mana supply if he begins a course of action that contravenes his Master’s wishes. However, due to the nature of Nuclear Annihilation as something unpredictable and uncontrollable, this skill will often fail to take effect when Oppenheimer begins such a course of action, only activating well after he has embarked on this course of action, which, considering his destructive potential, is often all too late.
    Self-Replenishment(Mana). : (C)
    This skill denotes the Avenger class receiving a constant stream of prana from the grail, to supplement their own master’s mana. At this rank, it effectively operates as independent-action at C-rank. However, it automatically is canceled out if Oblivion Correction takes effect.
    Personal Skills:
    Atomic Anatomy: (A+)
    As the incarnation of the concept of Nuclear Annihilation, his very body has been altered. While he initially appears to be a normal human, he is in fact, a walking , talking, nuclear bomb. His body is immune to poisons, toxins, has impressive mental resistance, is immune to curses which target biological matter and/or humans, and so on. However, curses which impede mechanical workings will have effects on him. Upon death, he explodes. Yeah.
    Innocent Monster: (D-)
    Oppenheimer was, in life, vehemently opposed to Nuclear Proliferation, and constantly campaigned for both sides of the Cold War to stand down and cease the nuclear arms race. However, the fact that he built the Atomic Bomb caused him to be seen as the father of the imminent doom of Humanity. Thus, he gains the Innocent Monster skill at this rank, which also receives a decrease in effectiveness due to the fact that he resists his status as Avenger of Nuclear Weapons. This skill acts not to warp his appearance significantly, as would be standard, but instead acts to warp his mentality to match what he represents. His mindset is bent towards ‘mutually assured destruction’, acting to ensure that if he would be defeated, his opponent would be so as well. However, it does have slight changes to his appearance and body, such as slightly colder body temperature, while his eyes slightly glow in the dark with an eerie light.
    Nuclear Arms Race: (A)
    This skill denotes a property of what he represents, as the representation of Nuclear Annihilation. Major superpowers, when confronted with each other’s massive hoards of Nukes, did not back down, but instead, amped up their own nuke production to even higher levels. Thus, this is sublimated into a skill which grants Oppenheimer advantages when fighting an opponent that is elevated in power in some way. This applies to both levels of Mystery and levels of sheer destructive force. It would be equally effective against a high-Mystery NP such as Excalibur, as a low-mystery one with more destructive potential, if such a thing existed.. He gains additional mana based on the quality of his opponent’s artifact and/or item of power, however, this mana is specifically meant for him to use for his Noble Phantasms, not to sustain himself. In addition, the more items of power his opponent has access to, the more he himself is able to gain mana that he must shunt into his burgeoning Noble Phantasms. This makes him a deadly opponent against both servants that have powerful artifacts, such as Arturia and her Excalibur, and opponents who have many artifacts/mystic codes, such as Perseus and his array of five noble phantasms. Against an opponent like Gilgamesh or EMIYA, whose arsenal of weapons is vast, and they have powerful trump cards, he would have access to nigh-unfathomable amounts of prana for his noble phantasms. The more mana gained in this way, the more his Innocent Monster skill is increased in effect, turning him progressively colder and more willing to utilize his Noble Phantasms.


    Noble Phantasms

    Nuclear Fire, ‘Oh Brahmastra, Be Man’s Sword’: (A~A++) (Anti-Fortress)
    This NP is the representation of the destructive potential of Nuclear Weapons. It represents the nuclear radiation, the fireball created, as well as the simple loss of life and the destruction wreaked by the use of a Nuclear bomb. It manifests as glowing green radioactive fire, which Oppenheimer can shape into a variety of forms. From spears made of fire that he throws at the enemy, to wings of fire that stretch from his back to allow him to fly, to even lions of fire with the power of Divine Beasts, the possibilities are endless. He can control the fire to a limited degree as to what they effect, ensuring they do not burn his allies. However, no matter what he does, they will poison the ambient mana, turning it sickly and impossible to safely use. Abilities that draw mana from the air will find great difficulty in drawing in prana from areas that have been affected by this noble phantasm, though this will alleviate over time as Gaia rectifies the abnormality. This power begins with A-ranked constructs or blasts, however, the more mana shunted into it, the more powerful these effects become, up to A++ ranked powers. This is Oppenheimer’s basic mode of attack and defense, and it is extremely powerful in comparison with his low parameters, which will surprise many opponents. However, without utilizing Nuclear Arms Race, it is extremely taxing in Mana, for obvious reasons. Against opponents who are low-ranked enough to not cause Nuclear Arms Race to activate to a large extent, he will quickly run out of mana to use and his constructs will dissipate, as well as being unable to create more nuclear blasts.

    Armageddon Harbinger, ‘Oh Brahmastra, Behold Man’s Zenith’: (EX) (Anti-Planet)
    This Noble Phantasm does not represents the effects of Nuclear Weapons. Rather, it represents the capacity of Nuclear Weapons to affect the world. It operates as a summoning of a massive amount of bombs, missiles, and other such objects, each and every one of which is a duplicate of a nuclear bomb that was once made in reality. Upon usage of this noble phantasm, every single one of them will begin to fly at a target,whilst they detonate. The explosions are contained, and the force of it is funneled into a spear, which means it in effect launches hundreds of nuclear explosion-spears at the enemy. This carries several limitations and conceptual effects. The first is that utilizing this noble phantasm means all of the nuclear weapons are launched, no matter what. This is because Armageddon is a Final Sanction, something that is simply not able to be done in a limited manner. This also means that using it will always result in massive collateral damage, as not only will the nukes cause mundane radiation poisoning, it’s status as objects of mystery means that many spiritual beings in the blast radius will be poisoned as well, which many include Oppenheimer and any allies if the target is not far away enough. The second limitation is that reusing this noble phantasm costs far more than the initial activation, as one must recreate all the lost nuclear weapons with prana, a task which is almost impossible without utilizing Nuclear Arms Race.

    The Conceptual effects of this noble phantasm are centered around the perception of Nuclear Weapons by Humanity. Seeing them as ‘the end of the world’ means that detonating them against a target deals both additional damage if the opponent is heavily affiliated with the Earth or a Planet, as well as destroying reality marbles. The fact that they are also seen as ‘the Height of humanity’, ‘the End of humanity’, and ‘the Folly of humanity’ means that against beings that are purely human, they are even more effective, not because they output energy more, but because they damage them on a deeper conceptual level, as humanity’s greatest weapons are used for what they are seen to do, to end Mankind. Against beings that are seen as [not human], such as Monsters, Dragons, Demigods, and other such beings, this is less effective, though with the power of this NP, that doesn’t count for much. A side-effect of this noble phantasm is the fact that it’s detonation with carry along with it Nuclear Fire, the first NP. Thus, an effect that blocks a single noble phantasm, will not be of much help.


    Both these NPs are related to the Brahmastra, the ancient Divine Weapon that was used in Hindu Mythology. However, this is less related in a close way, as vaguely related due to similar effects. The Brahmastra was based in Divine Authority, while these NPs are based on humanity’s mastery of the laws of the World, which allows them to achieve effects beyond what should be natural.
    .


    Last edited by WhatShouldNotBe; January 4th, 2017 at 12:40 AM.

  6. #3506
    It's All Good! 4score7years's Avatar
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    Class skills are listed under personal. And I thought oblivion correction did something else.

    That aside, this is a pretty cool sheet. Both Noble Phantasms are very cool, with the first being my favorite. The innocent monster effect is rather nice as well imo. Personality section and FC would make an already pretty good sheet better, though.

  7. #3507
    Totally not Eldritch WhatShouldNotBe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 4score7years View Post
    Class skills are listed under personal. And I thought oblivion correction did something else.

    That aside, this is a pretty cool sheet. Both Noble Phantasms are very cool, with the first being my favorite. The innocent monster effect is rather nice as well imo. Personality section and FC would make an already pretty good sheet better, though.
    I'm working on it.

    also, fixed the skills. Frickin BL and your formatting.

  8. #3508
    アルテミット・ワン Ultimate One asterism42's Avatar
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    Oblivion Correction buffs crit damage. Gameplay is deepest lore.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sandstorm77 View Post
    He's just putting the bone of his sword into other people until it explodes and lets out parts of him inside them.
    Quote Originally Posted by AvengerEmiya View Post
    Genderswaps are terrible, but I think I and other people would hate them less if Fate didn't keep ignoring actual heroines throughout history and folklore. Like, why bother turning Francis Drake into a woman when Ching Shih and Grace O'Malley exist?
    Quote Originally Posted by Five_X View Post
    Fate Zero is just Fate Stay Night for people who think Shirou is too girly
    Quote Originally Posted by Comun View Post
    I think Alex IV can eat Goku.

  9. #3509
    Totally not Eldritch WhatShouldNotBe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by asterism42 View Post
    Oblivion Correction buffs crit damage. Gameplay is deepest lore.
    Ffffffffffffffffuck.

    also, WHAT????

  10. #3510
    Totally not Eldritch WhatShouldNotBe's Avatar
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    Don't skills granted by NPs belong, well, IN THE NP DESCRIPTION, NOT THE PERSONAL SKILL LIST???

    other than that, pretty good.

    ....

    But that's not how Battle Continuation works,

  11. #3511
    鬼 Ogre-like You's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by WhatShouldNotBe View Post
    Don't skills granted by NPs belong, well, IN THE NP DESCRIPTION, NOT THE PERSONAL SKILL LIST???
    No... not necessarily. Check Zero Hassan.
    Quote Originally Posted by FSF 5, Chapter 14: Gold and Lions I
    Dumas flashed a fearless grin at Flat and Jack as he rattled off odd turns of phrase.
    "And most importantly, it's me who'll be doing the cooking."
    Though abandoned, forgotten, and scorned as out-of-date dolls, they continue to carry out their mission, unchanged from the time they were designed.
    Machines do not lose their worth when a newer model appears.
    Their worth (life) ends when humans can no longer bear that purity.


  12. #3512
    Tranquilo, Japones, Tranquilo JetKinen's Avatar
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    It's also not Battle Continuation

    Fate Grand/Order ID: 102947414/GreenBob
    JetKinen's tries very poorly to translate a brazilian book

  13. #3513
    Deadass Baka Ail Don's Avatar
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    Source: http://wen-jr.deviantart.com/art/Bla...49263037&qo=14
    Class: Assassin
    Alignment: Neutral Evil
    Origin: Folklore
    Region: America

    Parameters
    Strength: D
    Endurance: B
    Agility: B
    Mana: B
    Luck: A
    NP: C


    Height/Weight: 166cm/48kg
    Gender: Female
    Likes: Candy, tequila, flowers, candles, flashy colors, Little Jesus, dogs
    Dislikes: Improper sacrifices, being called “esqueleto”, other saints, Spaniards
    Talents: Death
    Natural enemy: Catholic Church
    Attribute: Fire, Earth
    Traits: Female
    Armament: Shifting robes, guns, scythe, globe

    Class Skills:

    Presence Concealment: ( - )
    Presence Concealment is the capacity to hide one's presence as a Servant. It is a common skill to the Assassin class.
    In the case of Assassin, this Skill has been lost in favor of Syncretism.

    Personal Skills:

    Holy Patron [Criminality]: (B)
    A Skill that can only be exercised by patron saints. Though the conditions for the activation of this Skill varies (Saint George being summoned in England or Catalonia is an example of one), when the conditions are fulfilled, the patron gains an ability relating to their patronage. Initially a far more harmless saint overseeing such things as healing and safe passage to the afterlife, she’s since been co-opted by various occupations in the underworld; and it’s from this that her recent boost in fame arises. Her self-described high priest himself is a high ranking member of a Mexican kidnapping cartel, and the occupations of those who venerate her only get more unseemly from there.

    Because she was prayed to by pimps, prostitutes, drug traffickers, human traffickers, gangsters, and other criminals, this Skill allows Assassin to successfully break any political law and get away with it. At this rank, offenses might even be made to some minor natural laws. Also encompasses the ability to summon the tools of the criminal trade, notably guns and drugs.

    Syncretism: (A)
    Syncretism is the combining of different beliefs, while blending practices of various schools of thought. Syncretism involves the merging or assimilation of several originally discrete traditions, especially in the theology and mythology of religion, thus asserting an underlying unity and allowing for an inclusive approach to other faiths. Syncretism also occurs commonly in expressions of arts and culture, as well as politics.
    Although the subject of a cult, Assassin’s fusion with the Catholic faith and the rest of the pantheon of saints was so seamless it’s as if she was always a secret part of it. Most of her Roman Catholic devotees find nothing sacrilegious about her worship, believing her to have no less sway than the Virgin Guadalupe or other decidedly Latin American religious figures. At its heart, syncretism is the acceptance of an alien influence into a culture, forming an equal bond.

    Thus, as a Skill; Assassin can become one with the World itself, similar to the effects of Sphere Boundary. At this rank, Assassin becomes a minor backdrop to the stage of reality itself. She doesn’t disappear completely as one with Presence Concealment does. Rather, her existence simply becomes accepted and ignored as one that belongs where it is, and has been there since her earliest convenience. From an outside perspective, Assassin attacking someone while making use of this Skill would appear to be unnoticed by the target. However, as with Presence Concealment, her rank drops when preparing to attack, albeit less considerably than the orthodox skill. Can also be overcome with Clairvoyance of a suitable rank or other similar Skill. Ineffective against Servants with an equal rank of a Mental Pollution Skill or higher.

    Mystic Eyes of Death Perception: (A)


    Noble Phantasm

    Mictecacihuatl
    Our Lady of the Holy Death

    Type: Anti-Unit
    Rank: C
    Range: 100
    Max Target: 1

    Before her re-imagining as a sort of pagan Catholic saint, Assassin began her existence (most likely) as the Aztec goddess of death. With the destruction of Aztec culture at the hands of the Spanish, Assassin’s worship was continued in post-Columbian Mesoamerica as La Parca (Grim Reapress), before being shaped into the deity worshiped today.

    Calling her mixed ancestral power, Assassin summons the trademark weapon of La Parca--the scythe. Huge and sharp with an inordinately long handle, there’s nothing inherently special about the scythe itself. Assassin forgoes any metaphysical benefit a weapon Noble Phantasm would give her, focusing instead on the symbolic image on the scythe, using it only as an extension of the powers she already has in place.

    Working in tandem with her Mystic Eyes, Assassin uses Mictecacihuatl to extend her range to reach the death lines. By inserting the scythe into nearby darkness, Assassin can remotely control the scythe to appear out of another unconnected shadow. Usually this would involve Assassin sticking the scythe into her own shadow, and have it appear inside the target’s shadow, as close as possible. Though it can appear in any source of darkness, Assassin likes to keep it simple. The only other stipulation for using Mictecacihuatl is that the effects can only be carried in Assassin’s direct line of sight. She might stand on a hill and spy people very far away and be able to use it, but she’ll never have the scythe spring up anywhere behind her. In pitch darkness, the scythe may appear from anywhere.


    Lore

    Santa Muerte is a female deity-saint of Mexican folk religion, venerated primarily in Mexico and the Southwestern United States. A personification of death, she is associated with healing, protection, and safe delivery to the afterlife by her devotees. Despite condemnation by the Catholic Church, her cult has risen to an unprecedented prominence in the 2000s and 2010s, as a continuation of the Aztec goddess of death Mictecacihuatl clad in Spanish iconography.

    Since the pre-Columbian era Mexican culture has maintained a certain reverence towards death, which can be seen in the widespread commemoration of the Day of the Dead. Elements of that celebration include the use of skeletons to remind people of their mortality. The worship of Santa Muerte is condemned by the Catholic Church in Mexico as invalid, but it is firmly entrenched among an increasing percentage of Mexican culture.
    In contrast to the Day of the Dead, overt veneration of Santa Muerte remained clandestine until the middle of the 20th century. When it went public in sporadic occurrences, reaction was often harsh, and included the desecration of shrines and altars. At the beginning of the 20th century, José Guadalupe Posada created a similar, but secular figure by the name of Catrina, a female skeleton dressed in fancy clothing of the period. José Guadelupe Posada began to evoke the idea that the universality of death generated a fundamental equality amongst man. His paintings of skeletons in daily life and that La Catrina were meant to represent the arbitrary and violent nature of an unequal society. Because of Assassin’s love of Posada’s art and the correctness of his ideals, she will also answer to the name Catrina. Or perhaps it’s a hint at the mortal woman behind the saint…?

    Santa Muerte generally appears as a skeletal female figure, clad in a long robe and holding one or more objects, usually a scythe and a globe. Her robe can be of any color, as more specific images of the figure vary widely from devotee to devotee and according to the rite being performed or the petition being made. Red for love, blue for knowledge, white for health, and black for death. However, she’s forsaken this classical form due to the further twisting of her character and popular depictions emphasizing her devotion to crime. Not quite an effect like Innocent Monster, but moreso as if her very Origin was changed.

    As the worship of Santa Muerte was clandestine until the 20th century, most prayers and other rites have been traditionally performed privately in the home. Since the beginning of the 21st century, worship has become more public, especially in Mexico City after Enriqueta Romero initiated her famous Mexico City shrine in 2001.The number of believers in Santa Muerte has grown over the past ten to twenty years, to an estimated 10-20 million followers in Mexico, the United States, and parts of Central America. Santa Muerte has similar male counterparts in the Americas, such as the skeletal folk saints San La Muerte of Paraguay and Rey Pascual of Guatemala


    Personality

    Assassin at first glance is haughty and terminally angry about something. Which she is. Described by her devotees as jealous and spite-filled if worshiped in tandem with other Catholic saints, Assassin will not allow anything she perceives as disloyalty or questioning her authority slide. Death is absolute and death is inevitable. Fighting either of them is just foolish.
    Conversely, she’s also a very fastidious person and will become upset if her plans are thrown into disarray. Has a very one-sided rivalry with Scathach, as she can’t abide someone who’s escaped death’s reach.


    Tactics

    Be careful. Be very very careful.


    -------------------------------------------------------
    I'm not sure what happened with this one. Might be trash, might be decent, might be really wanked too. Anyway, here's Servant 30.
    tldr her personality is Angsty Sombra. I would have used her Los Muertos skin as an fc but the hair is hideous.

  14. #3514
    死徒二十七祖 The Twenty Seven Dead Apostle Ancestors Bird of Hermes's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RoydGolden View Post
    And I still want to conserve my meme points in case I ever write up that Mahou Shoujo Lovecraft idea. Cthulhu knows that'd be the silliest Servant I've ever done...
    Ya may as well, I've done my own gritty grimdark version of his character so there's no reason you shouldn't. Also as I missed Nyarlahotep he was fun to read and a bit different from what's usually done by you.

  15. #3515
    All of Your Sadness Crying's Avatar
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    I expected a bit more feedback on my Macbeth sheet, to be honest.

    Oh well, I suppose not everything can be a "the Crusades were actually otome games" Jerusalem sheet.
    Certified F/GO hater.

    My Servants


    The starting penalty is five.


  16. #3516
    The smell of the lukewarm ocean and the chorus of cicadas RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Servant Saver:

    True Name: Yeshua Bar Nazareth

    Alignment: Lawful Good

    Summoning Catalyst: A fragment of the True Cross

    Alternate Classes: Saber, Rider, Caster, Ruler

    Strength- D+
    Agility- E
    Endurance- A+
    Mana- A++
    Luck- EX
    NP- EX

    Appearance:

    Source is here

    Personality
    : A kind-hearted and lovey-dovey girl who speaks fairly and eloquently, with passion radiating in her voice. Selfless to her core, Saver is one to dedicate her entire life for the sake of helping others achieve salvation and happiness. Overwhelmingly compassionate and cannot stand to see anyone suffer, believing in a chance of redemption for even the darkest and most twisted beings. If given the choice, Saver will always decide on the path of sacrificing herself for others.

    Though giving the impression of an unflappable holy woman, Saver is actually a rather passionate and hot-tempered girl with a tomboyish manner deriving from her years as a carpenter. Scolding those who do wrong and challenging the existing system of power, Saver's nature was far from some timid waif. One of the few things that can make Saver truly furious is the thought of people twisting the words of God to justify violence and hateful actions. Needless to say, she has some issues with the religious movement bearing her name in present day...

    Loving all of humanity, she holds particular affection for the Apostles who stood by her side in life and often reminisces fondly about their times together. This includes even her fateful betrayer Judas, who she bears no ill will towards. "...That kiss was something else, though."

    Saver's wish on the Grail is a simple one which she is unlikely to talk about. Simply for a chance to reincarnate in the present day, not as a vessel of god or a promised messiah, but an ordinary girl free to live the mundane life that had been denied to her. While Saver does not regret anything in her life, she nonetheless feels a curiosity tugging at her heart- "What sort of life would I have lived had I not been the messiah?"

    The sole selfish wish of a savior who devoted the entirety of her being to humanity.

    Likes: all humanity, her Father, woodwork
    Dislikes: tyrants, hypocrisy, those who misinterpret her teachings ...fig trees?
    Talents: humanity salvation, spreading her teachings, rebelling against existing authorities
    Natural Enemy: Nero, Pontius Pilate, Beast Of Revelation


    Class Skills:

    Charisma- A+
    Ability to inspire others, and lead armies. At this rank, one's popularity is beyond mundane reason and reaches the level of a Divine Mystery in its own right.

    Saver as god incarnate amassed a great many followers through her revolutionary sermons, selfless heart and awe-inspiring displays of divine power. The most famous of these were the Twelve Apostles who were her closest friends and confidants, comparable to a band of true companions from the likes of Shonen manga. After her death, Saver's revival came to inspire a theological movement which then became one of the largest and most dominant religions in the modern era- surely a testament to her incredible charisma.

    While due to her pacifism the "army leadership" aspect has been sealed, Saver is a peerless leader when it comes to inspiring the hearts and minds of men.

    Counter Hero- B

    A Skill to lower the parameters of "heroes" the Servant faces in combat.

    At this rank, all heroic opponents facing Saver sustain a twofold rank down to all parameters. The effect is more muted regarding foes of an anti-heroic disposition, merely lowering parameters by a single ranking.


    Personal Skills:

    Divinity- A-

    Measures one's Divine Spirit aptitude. At this rank, one is surely either a god themselves or very closely tied to one.

    Though literally God in the flesh, Saver purposely suppressed her divine nature in order to get closer and live amongst the humans she loved so much. As a rare Divine Spirit to also possess a full human nature due to having lived and breathed amongst humans and taken on their sins for herself, Saver bypasses the normal rule against summoning of Divine Spirits and can be called upon in the Holy Grail War.

    Messianic Constitution- EX

    A Skill that can be considered a "holy" variant of Masochistic Constitution, granted to those who acquired legendary status from taking the suffering of others onto themselves. All attacks in the vicinity are conceptually drawn towards Saver regardless of original target. This goes doubly for curses and similar effects.

    To relieve the burdens of humanity, Saver took on a human form even knowing that she'd eventually face a miserable death at their hands. Whether being cursed or reviled, betrayed by her closest friend, whipped or crucified... Saver bore all those indignities with a messianic smile that showed no regrets or sadness.

    Combined with her pacifistic philosophy of turning the other cheek, Saver can be considered "the ultimate target of abuse" who received every sin from humanity yet never once turned her backs on those she loved.

    Disguised God- A+

    Connotes the state of being as a divine spirit obscured amongst mortals. Similar to the Powerless Shell Skill, this disguises Saver's true divine essence as well as Heroic Spirit status and makes her appear as no more then a mundane human girl. Her Alignment is also listed as Chaotic rather then Lawful, reflecting how she was perceived by her Pharisee contemporaries as a haughty upstart seeking to overturn the values of Judaism.

    Saver took on a human body for herself and chose to live in the company of humans, including those that were at the lowest rungs of society such as drunkards, prostitutes and even tax collectors. It was at the point where the Pharisee authorities could not conceive Saver was the divinity she claimed to be, since- "No divine spirit could possibly tolerate being around such debaucherous company!"

    Saver's role in coming to earth was not to flaunt her own superiority as a divine being, but rather to show that with a little faith, any human could perform feats of God. The spark of God's grace exists in every human being, or so she'd say.

    Savior Of The Stars- EX

    A Skill similar to Pioneer Of The Stars regarding those messianic beings who came to overturn a previous era of humanity. As Saver was responsible for destroying the order of sin and death that bound humanity prior to her arrival, her presence exudes a sacred Bounded Field for ten feet in all directions in which all spells based on the concepts of "death", "decay" and "sin" are less effective. Furthermore, humans in that radius will find their wounds healing slightly faster then usual.

    The meek shall inherit the earth. Selfless love shall crush imperial power. The dead shall know life. Such were Saver's promises as a prophet, alien to the common sense of the world.

    Independent Action- A

    Ability to remain in existence without a supply of Mana from one's Master. At this rank, Saver can last in the world indefinitely without an active contract but backup from the Master is necessary to utilize Noble Phantasms of great magical energy.

    Having wandered for forty days and nights in the desert without eating even a single loaf of bread, Saver naturally possesses a great rank in this Skill.


    Noble Phantasms:


    Christus Victor
    - Christ Victorious On The Cross (EX, Anti-Death): A Noble Phantasm sublimating the most famous moment of Saver's life, her execution upon the cross and subsequent resurrection from the grave three days hence. In her death and resurrection, Saver symbolically shattered the twofold chains of sin and death binding humanity to usher in a new world order of selfless love.

    This Noble Phantasm activates upon Saver's death if three conditions are fulfilled. First, her death must be an act of self-sacrifice for the sake of defending another human being. Second, there must be at least one witness to confirm Saver's demise. And third, her teachings must've had a decisive influence on at least one other participant in the Holy Grail War, "converting" them to her way of thinking. When those conditions are fulfilled, Saver will revive three days after her death, her spiritual body reforming back into the world while consumed in a brilliant cross-shaped pillar of light visible from across a several mile radius.

    Once revived, Saver retains all her abilities from before death but the contract with her Master is severed, forcing her to sustain herself in existence through Independent Action until the forging of a new contract. A Noble Phantasm which allows for a situational resurrection so long as the proper criteria are met. However, if she dies in any other circumstance or simply lacks the requisite Mana to accomplish her revival, then this ability cannot activate.

    Rather then simply an instrument of torture and suffering, for Saver, the cross was the very throne by which her true divine authority made itself manifest. What was meant by the Roman authorities to be an emblem of her humiliation and defeat instead came to symbolize Saver's glorious triumph over the evils blighting mankind.

    "A king enthroned on the cross"- Such a phrase captures Saver's essence perfectly.


    Spineam Coronam- Shattering The Thorns Of The World (A, Anti-Unit): A Noble Phantasm representing the crown of thorns which was placed upon Saver's head during the crucifixion, intended as a cruel mockery of her supposed divine authority. Rather then embodying her ultimate triumph over the forces of sin and death, this Noble Phantasm instead serves as emblematic of Saver's suffering on the cross and role as one who ritually bore the burdens of all humanity out of selfless love.

    A slender band of woven laurels encircling Saver's head, appearing perpetually green and verdant by means of a divine miracle. Though once covered in wicked thorns, all such thorns now appear broken off the tips and are incapable of harming Saver in this state- serving merely as a symbol that has exhausted its original function.

    Sublimating her duel role as a redeemer of humankind and sacrificial martyr in their stead, invoking this Noble Phantasm allows Saver to heal a given target of all their injuries at the expense of bearing the accumulated damage in her own flesh. The wreath leaves Saver's head to levitate above the target, enlarges to form a ring around them and begins to swirl at great speed, gathering holy light like a centrifuge.

    This gathered light then envelopes the target and wipes away their wounds, returning them to a state of maximal vitality. However, once the wreath magically returns to Saver's head, matching wounds to those she's healed will open up on her own body.

    A restoration effect approaching True Magic, but yet the consequences to Saver from invoking this Noble Phantasm can prove dire indeed. In fact, this Noble Phantasm can easily prove a disadvantage in the Grail War because of how reckless Saver is in calling on its power, indescriminately healing the injuries of all those around her without any regard to her own self. A stubborn sacrificial love which throws away her own body to ceaselessly take up the burdens of others- that is Saver's nature.

    ...She truly is a bothersome person to manage, and unless partnered with a Master who has strong healing Magecraft in their own right, Saver could easily end up killing herself through thoughtless use of this Noble Phantasm without fighting even a single Servant.


    Et Templum Mundari- Reclaiming Of The Holy Temple (C+, Anti-Unit): A Noble Phantasm crystallizing Saver's expulsion of the merchants and money-changers from the holy temple. Irate at seeing the den of her Father perverted by such crass commerce, Saver took up a whip and drove them out by a barrage of scourging blows.

    This Noble Phantasm takes the form of a literal whip which Saver carries with her. Under most scenarios it is merely an ordinary whip that, while able to harm Heroic Spirits, is of little use in combat. However, under the conditions of "defending a holy territory" or "smiting those who have profaned the faith" the Noble Phantasm rises in power, becoming a scourging whip of holy light to smite enemies.

    In this form it deals great damage as well as inflicting a fear status ailment that drives the enemy to flee combat, "placing the fear of God in them" so to speak. The effects of this Noble Phantasm last until the opponent is successfully "driven out" to Saver's satisfaction, after which it returns to being an ordinary whip.

    Because of her pacifistic nature, this is Saver's least favorite of her three Noble Phantasms and one she uses only when absolutely necessary to defend the faith.


    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    A rather silly idea for a sheet that just popped into my head yesterday. Well, it had occurred to me to do a (genderbent) Jesus Christ sheet years ago but I was never struck with sufficient inspiration until now. There's been a few versions of Jesus depicted here so far (including one awesome one as a motorcyclist) but I hope mine is distinctive enough to stand apart in its own right. (Even aside from the genderbend...)

    In any case, say hello to your moe lord and savior, everyone! I'm totally going to be struck down by divine lightning for this, aren't I...?
    Last edited by RoydGolden; March 28th, 2017 at 05:40 PM. Reason: Added author's note

  17. #3517
    死徒二十七祖 The Twenty Seven Dead Apostle Ancestors Bird of Hermes's Avatar
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    A genderbent Jesus...I and thought Neil Armstrong was a bit much. This is a figure I wouldn't do that to because some people may honestly take offence to it. Anyways, I'll put my views on that aside for now. As to the sheet itself, the original skills have their own merit. As for the NP's, I'm not sure Christus Victor would work as true resurrection has been stated to be impossible in the nasuverse. Spineam Coronam kinda renders Messianic Constitution mute as both are about taking pain to help others while Et Templum Mundari is ok, I would have had the effect be that it does more damage the wealthier the target is as it used against money lenders.

    Also, views on Ęthelflęd?

  18. #3518
    Tranquilo, Japones, Tranquilo JetKinen's Avatar
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    Too much Royd.

    Too much.

    Fate Grand/Order ID: 102947414/GreenBob
    JetKinen's tries very poorly to translate a brazilian book

  19. #3519
    The smell of the lukewarm ocean and the chorus of cicadas RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bird of Hermes View Post
    A genderbent Jesus...I and thought Neil Armstrong was a bit much. This is a figure I wouldn't do that to because some people may honestly take offence to it. Anyways, I'll put my views on that aside for now. As to the sheet itself, the original skills have their own merit. As for the NP's, I'm not sure Christus Victor would work as true resurrection has been stated to be impossible in the nasuverse. Spineam Coronam kinda renders Messianic Constitution mute as both are about taking pain to help others while Et Templum Mundari is ok, I would have had the effect be that it does more damage the wealthier the target is as it used against money lenders.

    Also, views on Ęthelflęd?
    Yeah, I was definitely pushing the envelope a bit this time. I imagine this forum stacks pretty secular all-in-all though, so I'm probably in the clear.

    Christus Victor is "resurrection" in the sense of letting her come back again from the Throne after being killed. It'd be no more impossible then Heroic Spirit summoning in general. Regarding the second NP and Skill, they were intended to synergize to make her a very defensively aligned Servant, sort of like St. George with his various Skills yet even more so.

    Ethelred (no clue how to spell her name without punctuation they my keyboard doesn't have) is pretty cool. A lot of flavor with her personality and the like and her Craft Essences were quite cute. She sounds like somebody who'd bounce very off of other Servants. Also, I got a kick out of the 'notice me sempai' and 'original creation do not steal' references.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by JetKinen View Post
    Too much Royd.

    Too much.
    Nay, I know not the very concept of restraint! I shan't halt my progress until every heroic figure on this earth has been turned into an anachronistically cute girl!

    All hail our moe lord and savior, who shall bring salvation to this filthy world of male pigs! Okay, I'll stop now...

  20. #3520
    Deadass Baka Ail Don's Avatar
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    Royd unironically endorsing moe guro
    For shame

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