Type-moon, where We turn joke characters into ACTUAL characters
Type-moon, where We turn joke characters into ACTUAL characters
here is a list of my servant sheets(new and improved format for my servant sheets)
Come explore the White Library, and reach the bottom of this Abyss
Fate / White Memoria
So, I was planning to do a gender-flip for Voss, but it turns out that that conflicts with part of his family history, so I scrapped it. The picture I had in mind will go better with Eddie Rickenbacker (who is next) anyway.
Also note: His stats are so low because next to nobody knows who this guy is despite the fact that he's awesome.
Character image by https://www.pixiv.net/member.php?id=760095
Shitty crop job by me
Werner Voss
Class: Rider
Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Origin: German Empire
Region: Rhein-Westphalia
Parameters
Strength: E
Endurance: D
Agility: B+
Mana: E
Luck: C
NP: B
Height/Weight: 178 cm / 71 kg
Gender: Male
Likes: His home country, mechanics, a good fight, Manfred von Richtofen.
Dislikes: Losing, running away from battle, asshole commanders
Talents: Timing and shell games
Natural enemy: James McCudden
Attribute: Man
Traits: Human, Male
Armament: Officer's sword, Luger P08 pistol
Class Skills:
Riding: (B)
The ability to ride modern vehicles and use animals as mounts. However, due to existing in a modern era, Voss is incompatible with magical beasts of any type. Almost all vehicles and mundane animals can be handled with consummate skill. Maneuvers that should be borderline impossible can be performed with some effort.
Magic Resistance: (E)
Cannot cancel spells, but magic damage is reduced somewhat. This is only a feature of his class, as Voss had no contact with magecraft in life.
Personal Skills:
Eye of Mind- True: A
Voss' honed and polished skills as a pilot were among the best in all of history, combined with incredible situational awareness that made him virtually impossible to sneak up on. Manfred von Richtofen, the infamous Red Baron, often claimed that Voss was his only equal and rival. In the opening moments of Voss's final duel with McCudden and the pilots of the RAF's 56th Squadron, Voss was attacked from behind and simply spun his aircraft around in the work of an instant to turn the attack against his opponents. During the battle, he held his own in the midst of an aerial melee against eight allied and coordinated opponents simultaneously.
Clairvoyance: C+
As a fighter pilot during the era before radar, Voss had to rely solely on his eyes in combat. As such, his unnaturally sharp vision allows him to pick out and track targets from distances of ten kilometers, while also being exceptionally detail-oriented up close.
Charisma: E
A natural leader, Voss chafed under his squadron leaders in his early career, and was respected over them before his friend and superior Manfred von Richtofen ordered that Voss receive a command of his own. While at ease with leading, Voss is not always the best commander because of his tendency to ignore retreating as an option. He will also be somewhat difficult for a Master to work with.
Noble Phantasm
Lore
Personality
Tactics
Last edited by EonADS; June 4th, 2017 at 11:58 PM.
Werner Voss: Given his build(in terms of Parameters), I can definitely see a Hit & Run being the only way towards victory, clever! Although, I'm a bit worried since his Blood Knight tendencies may put him in danger...
Here are some remarks:
A recent Servant with an EX-ranking Parameter? I believe it's best to reduce it to at least A, as I doubt even when he's on his Folker F.1 will he go so fast that it's impossible to record.
Enhanced eyesight are of the C-ranking Clairvoyance, while B-rankings allows future sight, which is essentially seeing to the future. So I would suggest you lower it to C or C+.
A question, I'm confused with the NP's detail: it describes the plane having slower speed, so wouldn't Voss' Agility be lowered when he activates his NP?
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Additionally, the Sky Attribute is only given to Servants of Divine origins, and Voss is definitely a human being so change it to Man. Just pointing it out.
Last edited by SleepMode; June 4th, 2017 at 11:34 PM.
The Act of dozing off in the afternoon is a luxury indeed.
Coffee would be nice, though.
[Collection of my Servant Sheets]
Now Revamped!
Ross: Pretty cool sheet, but the Swordsmanship Skill strikes me as unnecessary. Not every ability a Servant has needs to be slotted into a Skill, especially since it's not even at a legendary level. Also as a Rider he really ought to have Magic Resistance even if at a low rank. Other then that it's a cool sheet, if maybe a little wanked in parts. I particularly like how you fleshed out his NP.
Yeah, I already adjusted his agility before you said that. That was a beta detail that I had meant to change more or less from the start.
C+, then, because Archer EMIYA's C-ranked Clairvoyance only gives him sight of up to 4 kilometers. Voss is more than double that.
Not at all, because his maneuverability is increased at least as much. The Fokker Triplane's three wing design allowed it to preform moves such as a flat rudder turn, which is physically impossible in near any other aircraft because it would stall out. Even modern fighter jets can't perform a true flat rudder turn, they can only slowly rudder around, not spin their plane 180 in an instant like the Fokker could. That was part of why the thing was so damn deadly.
--Updated--
I used E- Swordsmanship specifically because it's intentionally weakened by the ability. Voss is basically the Servant equivalent of an amateur swordsman.
Kinda leery about Magic Resistance given that he had no contact whatsoever with magic in life, but I suppose you have a point.
Can you tell me what parts of Voss are wanked so I can avoid making similar mistakes in future?
Last edited by EonADS; June 4th, 2017 at 11:37 PM.
Still doesn't feel worthy of a Skill slot IMO. By that logic, wouldn't every Saber in the series have it? (And Lancers would have spearmanship, and Archer's bowmanship, et cetera...)
He should have it simply because it's a Class Skill. That said, it probably shouldn't be any higher then E-rank.
Point. I'll remove it. It's not like he really needs to be much weaker in a heads-up fight.
Done and done. I keep forgetting what are class skills and what aren't. This isn't likely to be the last time I miss something like that.He should have it simply because it's a Class Skill. That said, it probably shouldn't be any higher then E-rank.
EonADS, i goes Its okay to forget if you fixa up later, i mean, i always end up lateral "creating" skill that are literaly the same thing as a alredy existing one
here is a list of my servant sheets(new and improved format for my servant sheets)
Come explore the White Library, and reach the bottom of this Abyss
Fate / White Memoria
"I have to lead them? Damn; just when I was sure I could take a break... (ahem) March, my soldiers; onwards towards our certain victory!”
Faceclaim
Servant Class: Rider
True Name: Titus Quinctius Flamininus, The Conqueror of Greece
Place of Origin: Rome (Roman Republic)
Alignment: Chaotic Good
Attribute: Man
Alternate Classes: Lancer, Caster
Catalyst: The gold wreath he dedicated to Apollo
Likes: Greek culture, “Doing nothing,” The Greeks
Dislikes: Forced into something, Dictatorship, Disagreements
Talents: Negotiation, Smalltalk
Natural Enemy: The Emperors of Rome, Philip V of Macedon, Hannibal
Parameters:
Strength - C+
Endurance - B
Agility - C (When he actually tries)
Mana - D
Luck - A
N.
Phantasm - B+
Background
Personal Traits
Craft Essence/Keywords/Reactions
Skills
Noble Phantasms
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(Whew, this was a big one.)
Last edited by SleepMode; June 7th, 2017 at 10:58 AM. Reason: General edits
The Act of dozing off in the afternoon is a luxury indeed.
Coffee would be nice, though.
[Collection of my Servant Sheets]
Now Revamped!
Flaminius: Is there really anything to say about this sheet apart from it being very good? You've taken an interesting character and developed them as a Servant who has an unstoppable offense and a powerful counterattack. Although I wonder exactly what weapon he uses when he does not have an elephant on hand but regardless it's a great sheet thank you
I need to come back later to review the other sheets though... damn you real world responsibility
These are my Servant and Master sheets I hope you enjoy reading them:
Servant And Master Sheets
Berserker: death
Str:C(A), End:B(A), Agi:B(A)
Mna:A(C), Lck:EX, Np:EX
Aligment: true/neutral
Gender: none (apears female)
Height: 162cm
Weight: 54kg
Place of origen: the root
Armament: scythe, sword, dagger
Likes:chess, books, nature, talks
Dislikes: people who cheat, unnecesery deaths, people who try to disrupt the natural flow of life
Talents:very good understending of the valors of life and death
Natural enemies: self proclaim immortals
Skills
mad enhancement(n/a):this skill is sealed because of her second noble phantasm
presence concealment(A):Its almost imposible to noticed berserker if she wants to.a odd rarity to this servant, her level do not drop while preparing and executing attacks
Fate ensurence(A):a skill that shows her superiority over luck, any skills or noble phantasms that disrupt fate are nullified or greatly reduced of Its might
healing magecraft-false(A): while not a actual magus, her innate understending of how humans lifes work give her a Talent to heal
Comforting presence(B+): in the end, one could say death is a friend. Her presence gives a comforting aura that makes enemies slowly start to acepct the inevitability of death. It works better in lawful enemies.
Memento mori: you cant plug your ears and cover your eyes ( あなたはあなたの耳を塞ぐカントそしてあなたの目をカバー メメント モリ * Anata wa anata no mimiwofusagu kanto soshite anata no me o kabā Memento mori)(anti-self:A):
When activated, this noble phantasm deals a fast and wide spread slash with whoever is the weapon being used. Its almost imposible to defend or avoid, a EX rank End or Agi togheter with EX rank Lck would be needed to even have a chance.
It can be used three time in sequence and thant a break is needed. The three attacks can be exchange for one only sure-kill slash that takes more time to charge and a slightly lower chance of hitting.
Utrimque duabus: the duality of death ( 死の二重性 ウトリンケ ヅアブス * Shi no nijū-sei Utorinke dzuabusu)(anti-life:EX): this noble phantasm is always active in some form. It has to sides, peaceful death and violent death.
Berserker usualy stays in the peaceful form, when the name is called, she turns into violent form and changing her stats and comportament, This also makes the time to recharge -Memento mori- faster.
While in violent form, both presence concealment and comforting presence are sealed.
Lore: death, or rather, the human conception of death, is the encharge of taking the humans souls into the after-life(s)
Its important point out that she is not a god or goddess of death, nether a angel, demon or any other deity but insted, something that was born togheter with the first human and will only disaper after the last human.
While about animals, they have another system.
Appearence: Her peaceful form has the Appearence of a 17 year-old girl whering a black jacket over a "niquel nause" t-shirt and black jeans with red all-stars, her skin is pale (the good looking type, not the morbid one), her her is black, short and a little wild, her eyes are the only anormal thing in her Appearence, they are shiny purple.
Her violent form looks older, her hair is longer and her skin is deadly pale now.
She gains a skull mask that look like the ones used by the hassan-i-sabbah and her clothes now are a black and red royal military uniform, also her eyes turn red.
In both forms she is capable of swaping betwen a giant sycthe, a rapier or a black dagger.
Personality:Her personality is that of a nice and smart girl, she likes too talk about trivial things and read fantasy or sci-fi books, but she can become very serious when in presence of senseless killers or needless cruelty
If ask about why is she so normal looking, she will respond "whats more human thant death?"
Her violent form has a much more serious personality, only focusing on killing the enemy and even looking kinda obsecive about it. Still, she will gets out of her way to garante that there is no causalities to people uninvolve and will always protect her master. Now, reather or not this is intencional is hard to get.
here is a list of my servant sheets(new and improved format for my servant sheets)
Come explore the White Library, and reach the bottom of this Abyss
Fate / White Memoria
Werner Voss: Goddammit this is what happens when I don't have the chance to review the sheets immediately, MORE GET WRITTEN. Voss is a very interesting Servant, he is also alongside Falminius one of two Rider class Servants that are far better Rider style Servants than the Zhuang Zhi mess I made (I'm still feeling embarrassed about that one). There is not much for me to say about the sheet that has not been mentioned and though I feel he may lack offensive power this makes sense considering his lack of fame. Also wondering where you got the idea to do a fighter pilot Servant?
Death: Sad to say I am generally cynical with any Servant that takes on a general concept like this instead of being focused on a single character or myth. So for a sheet that is "Death" I am interested in seeing whether it spans all Humanities understanding of Death, represents the most common themes and is an incredibly strong Servant although it also must be incredibly strange. So starting from parameters I have to add while most of them make sense, although given the "fame" of Death you'd imagine it would be insanely high, Luck at EX rank is... questionable? Why? Death has never really been seen as "Lucky", even when anthropomophosised Death is an inevitable figure rather than a "Lucky" one so it is completely out of place. The classification is also strange as Death has no real relation to Madness and since Madness Enhancement is sealed the class is seemingly irrelevant. The rest of the skills make sense. A mention on formatting is noting where the "Noble Phantasm" section begins, it goes a long way to make your sheets appear less lazy and would help me in thinking that you are dedicating time to the creation of them. With regard to Noble Phantasms only the second one makes sense, the first one is slapping an idea of "Death being unavoidable" on an attack, there is no clear relation between the two and there are so so many ways that the concept of Death could be better dealt with. While the second Noble Phantasm makes more sense it's still pretty boring and a bit distant from the concept of Death, it's also a parameter raising interaction with the first NP so even though most of the sheet leads up to it it is quite anticlimactic. You've done well on appearance and personality so it's mainly the NPs and Skills you need to work on, "Concept" based Servants (see Pale Rider) are so completely abstract that they have to be far different from this. I know I might be sounding a bit harsh here (considering I'm about to drop the stupidest Servant sheet I've made yet) but I thought about these when I planned to make a Masque of Red Death Servant, so honestly an abstract character like this is far more difficult to nail.
These are my Servant and Master sheets I hope you enjoy reading them:
Servant And Master Sheets
Fate/Zero, Berserker and Gilgamesh, mainly. Voss isn't nearly in their league in terms of power, but he's far and away a better pilot. Heck, I could probably do ones of Richtofen, McCudden, and Georges Guynemer of France too. I'm already planning on doing one for Eddie Rickenbacker, and all of them are unique enough to set them apart, except maybe McCudden.
Fun fact, Voss is NOT one of the Servants that gets stronger in his home country (i.e. Vlad Tepes and Cu Chulainn). He was buried in an unmarked grave in Belgium, so he doesn't rest there, nor does he have any grave marker to denote him other than as part of mass monuments. He also is virtually un-remembered in Germany next to his buddy Manfred, and is arguably more famous in Britain as part of James McCudden's legend than he is from his own. Such a reward for a patriotic soldier, eh?
The Act of dozing off in the afternoon is a luxury indeed.
Coffee would be nice, though.
[Collection of my Servant Sheets]
Now Revamped!
Zh: Hmm... This may be a bit of a stretch, but how do you think your Flamininus would get along with my Gideon? Since they both have a "lazy but secretly serious" thing going on.
The following is a joke, please please don't slate me on this too hard Also I'm sorry Royd
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Servant Identity
Appearance
Skills
Noble Phantasm
These are my Servant and Master sheets I hope you enjoy reading them:
Servant And Master Sheets
The Cain with No Name:
I don't know how you came up with the idea of Cain as a spaghetti-western wannabe, but it's pretty great. The visual of the super edgy Cain of Royd's sheets dressed in a cowboy outfit and constantly making movie references is hilarious.
This is glorious. I haven't even finished reading the Cain sheets yet, and I'm still laughing so hard at the image of it all. This is great.
The Cain with No Name: pppfffftttt. Now I can't help but think that Cain is secretly a Spaghetti Western Movie Buff.
The Act of dozing off in the afternoon is a luxury indeed.
Coffee would be nice, though.
[Collection of my Servant Sheets]
Now Revamped!
Personally I thought "The Man With No Cain" had a different ring to it but yours makes far more sense. It could've been done better but that's another Servant slot filled for the Cain only Grail War. Naturally I couldn't find a FC but just looking at the Cain sheets and playing The Good The Bad and The Ugly theme produces this effect, thanks for your feedback though
These are my Servant and Master sheets I hope you enjoy reading them:
Servant And Master Sheets