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Thread: Create-A-Servant 2

  1. #5381
    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Venomking: You reposted the sheet here, but you didn't make any of the corrections I advised over in Modern Fiction. If you want to see my feedback, check here.

  2. #5382
    lordofvenom venomking's Avatar
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    i am, but its ganan be later today, i have students to teach today.

  3. #5383
    Dead Apostle Eater Gally's Avatar
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    Saber

    Appearance (roughly):


    Faceclaim: http://www.topit.me/item/4229094
    Name: Ywain
    Title: Knight of the Lion, The Fountain Knight
    Other classes: Rider, Berserker
    Gender: Male
    Alignment: Chaotic Good
    Place of Origin: Britain
    Theme: Stand By Me by Ben E King

    Parameters:

    Strength: B
    Endurance: B
    Agility: C
    Mana: C+
    Luck: B

    Class Skill(s):

    Riding (B):
    One can ride animals and most vehicles with above average expertise.

    Magic Resistance (B):
    Cancel spells with a chant below three verses. Even if targeted by High-Thaumaturgy and Greater Rituals, it is difficult for a Servant to be affected.

    Personal Skill(s):

    Man Against The World (B):
    When facing two or more enemies at once, this Servant’s likelihood of survival is increased.

    Despite being one to seek out adventure greater than any other before him and plunging headfirst into danger, Saber came out relatively unscathed.

    When the battle has ended and dust settled, he is likely to come out alive—and livelier than most.

    The Bigger They Are (A):
    Saber gains an advantage over those larger than him, whether it be their actual size, combat abilities, or scope of their legends.

    Noble Phantasm(s):

    A Knight’s Best Friend (A+, Self):
    Saber is able to summon a familiar to add him and his Master and act as their guardian.

    It is the lion he befriended in his legend, and the embodiment of all that Saber was and forever will be. It can even act as a proxy Servant in case he and his Master are ever separated. When acting as a proxy, Saber is able to communicate through it regardless of state of mind or circumstance.

    A Lady’s Love (B, Anti-Personnel):
    When hopelessly surrounded, horribly crippled, gravely wounded, or otherwise in such danger that the possibility of defeat is great, Saber has a greater chance of surviving to fight another day.

    Gained from his friendship with a lady who gave him a ring which guaranteed his safety from imprisonment, sickness, and the shedding of blood as long as he thought of her fondly.

    Only active if Saber’s relationship with his Master is more than skin deep. Rank increases to A if they are female.

  4. #5384
    鬼 Ogre-like You's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by venomking View Post
    i am, but its ganan be later today, i have students to teach today.
    what do you teach?

  5. #5385
    lordofvenom venomking's Avatar
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    Philosophy, history, and math.

    - - - Updated - - -

    So finally caught a break, my students are doing a pop quiz right now. So I can finally edit it.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Alright edited it, I'll do a little more later.

  6. #5386
    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by venomking View Post
    Philosophy, history, and math.

    - - - Updated - - -

    So finally caught a break, my students are doing a pop quiz right now. So I can finally edit it.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Alright edited it, I'll do a little more later.
    Have to admit I never fancied you as a teacher. Not to be mean, but I hope your teaching is a lot clearer and more concise then your writing...

  7. #5387
    lordofvenom venomking's Avatar
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    It is, i don't really have to wright, my wife does that, we co teach the class. So anything more I ahve to edit.
    Alos just so you know she does wrighting I teach the lessons.

  8. #5388
    lordofvenom venomking's Avatar
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    True name: blood countess.
    Alignment: evil chaotic
    likes: blood, killing young maidens, and having fun.
    Dislikes: boredom, order, and laws( stupid laws that never let me kill young maidens, she says with absolute scorn.)
    Class: avenger.

    Background: her history is most similar to Camellias herself, but with added background of her being a Mage attempting a ritual that would have to her into the highest class of a dark apostle.
    States.
    Agility:
    b
    mana:
    c
    strength:
    b+
    luck:
    E
    endurance:
    C

    personal skills:
    blood sucker, b

    torture techniques, a
    Has added bonus against girls.

    NP:
    Blood bath of the blood countess. A~EX
    this phantasm is her only phantasm, and takes the ritual she attempted to commit, she needs to kill at least two hundred buetifull maidens without being caught for the first stage, however once she has killed at least 850 buetifull women she reaches a EX rank.
    At her fist stage she only gains low leval regeneration and the ability to use blood as high speed projectiles.
    at her second stage she gains a danger level similar to Vlad, with her blood projectiles posing the danger level of c class Phantasms. At her third stage she gains enough regeneration to be effectively called immortal, her blood projectiles reach the leval of A+ NPs and she can use any blood around her, and if a servant has an opened wound she can attack themusing there own, as well the blood can be made into shapes likes and walls to block incoming atacks, and adidas a curse of un healing per every five projectiles that hit its target. And her stats all become A+.

  9. #5389
    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by venomking View Post
    It is, i don't really have to wright, my wife does that, we co teach the class. So anything more I ahve to edit.
    Alos just so you know she does wrighting I teach the lessons.
    Erm, if you don't mind me asking, how old are you?

    Because of your posting style (for lack of a better term) I'd pegged you as early twenties at most, but the references to teaching and having a wife obviously cast doubt on that impression.

    - - - Updated - - -

    "Blood Countess": Hate to say it, but this is pretty much Carmilla only with a different (overpowered) NP and essentially no personality to speak of. Also I don't really see the reason for her as an Avenger.

    The Avenger Class seems to be for those whose legends were defined by a vendetta of some kind (either with individuals or humanity as a whole), whereas I don't really see that in her. She sounds more like a villain who's just evil for the sake of it, not acting out of revenge. (And if that is her motive you really could've stood to clarify that somewhere in the sheet itself)

  10. #5390
    Best Caster asterism42's Avatar
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    "Heeeey, Master! Queen Jezebel is here to ensure all your wishes come true. Once you've seen my magic, true proper divine magic, I'm sure you'll be ready to bow your head in reverence."

    Caster
    Jezebel



    Alignment: Neutral Evil
    STR: E
    END: E
    AGI: E
    MAG: A+
    LUCK: D
    NP: A

    Class Skills

    Territory Creation (A):
    A Caster-class Skill. It is the Skill to build a special terrain that is advantageous to oneself as a magus, with such functions as the ability to collect mana. Creation of a Temple, superior in quality to a standard workshop, becomes possible.

    Item Construction (C): A Caster-class Skill. It is the Skill to manufacture magical items, from implements of war to items for daily use. Also, this Skill requires time to gather components and manufacture items themselves. Jezebel specializes in creating cosmetics and jewellery that enhance her own beauty and charm, but have little combat use.

    Personal Skills

    Golden Rule – Weath and Body (D): A skill that combines the effects of both versions of Golden Rule. The Body version denotes the possession of a natural and perfect goddess-like body, preserving beauty. Unlike the Natural Body Skill whose body shape does not change despite how much caloric intake was taken, there is no effect on the owner’s Strength parameter. The Wealth aspect is the ability to gather money to oneself.

    Lover of Luxury (B): A skill not dissimilar from Golden Rule, however it draws in material luxuries instead of wealth. Due to the extravagance of Jezebel’s possessions, money is lost due to this skill. Jezebel likes to use the gathered delights as ingredients for her magical trinkets. As it is of a higher rank then Golden Rule, Jezebel’s net income is in the red. It also reduces her defence against mental interference, especially charm-type skills, being a skill that embodies gluttony and lust.

    Protection of the Faith (A): A Skill possessed by those who have sacrificed themselves for a religious view; though Jezebel did not truly sacrifice herself, through her manipulations, she managed to temporarily supplant the state religion of an entire country. Despite being a form of divine protection, it is not a blessing from a higher existence. It is only the absoluteness of one's body and soul, which is born from faith. However, if it is too high, it causes abnormalities in one’s personality. In Jezebel’s case, the mere thought of someone affronting her beloved patron gods causes her to fly into a furious rage.

    Noble Phantasm

    Ba'al Zebub
    O Lord of the Flies, Your Majesty Shall Cause All to Decay


    Anti-Army, A+: Jezebel’s Noble Phantasm is an invocation to one of her patron deities, the god Ba’al. However, in a way not dissimilar to the Innocent Monster skill, the demonization of Ba’al by the Abrahamic religions means her prayers are answered in the form of the demon Beelzebub. The flies summoned by the spell act as familiars for Jezebel, their size making them ideal spies. They have a more sinister ability wherein they can infest a living creature with their offspring, turning them into revenants that can birth a new swarm of flies. As the infestation is a curse, magic resistance can shrug off its effects. Once the swarm has reached a large enough size, Jezebel can cause the demon prince himself to manifest in the world, with all his powers manifested. A secondary effect of this Noble Phantasm is Jezebel’s ability to turn those who offend her into flies. Despite its power, she loathes this ability deep in her heart, considering it both an affront to the god she loves and an ugly and hideous magic that stains her beauty.

    Lore
    Likes: Lord Ba’al, Lady Asherah
    Dislikes: Dogs
    Talents: Religious solicitation
    Natural Enemy: Elijah

    A Phoenician princess and wife of Ahab who appears in the Book of Kings in the Old Testament of the Bible. She introduced Ba’al to the Jews, but when the prophet Elijah defeated the prophets of Ba’al and Asherah, she tried to kill him. After Ahab died, her sons Ahaziah and Joram sat on the throne, but both died in a coup. She was thrown from a balcony, then ran over with a chariot, and her remains were left for the dogs. All this was as prophesied by Elijah, as retribution for killing Naboth for his vineyard.

    A woman of immense pride, in both her beauty and her power. She considers her magic to be a gift from the divine, and as a sorceress from the Age of the Gods she far outclasses modern magi, even though she never pursued the path of the magus. She is amused by her reputation in the modern world as a manipulative seductress, though she isn’t too fond of the fact that her name has become a synonym for a prostitute. Her wish is for her gods to exceed the glory and power of Yahweh.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sandstorm77 View Post
    He's just putting the bone of his sword into other people until it explodes and lets out parts of him inside them.

  11. #5391
    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six RoydGolden's Avatar
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    That Jezebel sheet is pretty cool. The Skills fit and her NP is suitably grotesque. (Wasn't there something similar in Blue Exorcist to the whole 'infesting somebody with flies' part?)

  12. #5392
    Best Caster asterism42's Avatar
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    Quite possibly. I, however, was inspired by the Beelzebub boss fight in Devil Survivor.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sandstorm77 View Post
    He's just putting the bone of his sword into other people until it explodes and lets out parts of him inside them.

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