Create-A-Servant 2

[RoydGolden]

I don't think I ever found what type of bird it was he transformed into. I may have overlooked it. As for the fire strikers, I couldn't really think of something to do with those. And please work on your punctuation. I'll get to that in the updated profile.

I agree with CritHit here. An original Skill or two would be nice to spice him up (maybe something to do with the legend where he disguised himself as a woman to assassinate some rival princes) and Kusanagi could be made a lot stronger. You're telling me that one of the three God-given Imperial Regalia and the Japanese equivalent of Excalibur is only a B-ranked NP?

[gyrowins]

If you're going to make a historical figure a loli, it needs to be one that will make a lot of people angry

I made Saladin an older sister type once and made people pretty damn angry about it. Anyway,

I always have my doubts about NPs conditioned by things like having to actively search for information in this case having EX rank. If it was a Gate of Storylon NP, it'd be okay for me, but that's a minor detail.

As I mentioned, this was going to be in a Grail War, so part of that condition was for some humor during his set up. Specifically, a lot of arguing with his master about time-wasting and picking the wrong kinds of material.

As for Anansi, the sheet is good, though I must quibble about the NP. The originator of stories might have more to do with bringing characters and actions into existence, rather than objects (though I know that the latter is far more balanced).

Possibly something along the lines of forcing people to follow the structure of a particular tale or weaving an archetypal character into existence (possibly as a lesser Heroic Spirit or something). It might also be used to weave an archetypal character onto someone, granting them capabilities beyond those of a normal human (or Heroic Spirit, if used on one)

I chose the "bringing objects into existence" route due in part to balance, yes. The way he was going to achieve that sort of enhanced capacity was by granting them Noble Phantasms rather than upgrading them directly. Of course, Captain America's super serum could be a Noble Phantasm...

If you allow me to ask a question, are/were you writing a fanfic with the sheets you post? You always say "they were going to be a Servant for this and that" in the Servant Usage part.

I was going to write a fanfic with a friend of mine. A prologue and first chapter are on here somewhere, but more of it can be found here. It'll soon be about a year since the last post, so you can tell how well the production of it is going.

Fate/Gestalt was to be the first part, followed by Fate/Advent Ruin, then completed with a third part we never got around to naming. The servants I've been posting are for that nameless third part.

[RoydGolden]

I made Saladin an older sister type once and made people pretty damn angry about it.

Okay, this I need to see.

[CritHit]

I agree with CritHit here. An original Skill or two would be nice to spice him up (maybe something to do with the legend where he disguised himself as a woman to assassinate some rival princes) and Kusanagi could be made a lot stronger. You're telling me that one of the three God-given Imperial Regalia and the Japanese equivalent of Excalibur is only a B-ranked NP?

Glad you agree Royd.

For an example of what I think could be done with Yamato Takeru, I made her the human incarnation of a curious Elemental (which took the form of a bird, which is my reasoning for why he turned into one after death). And as an incarnation of an Elemental, had a mana core very similar to Arturia. In the end, my Yamato Takeru is VERY same-y to Arturia, but that's what I was kinda going for.

Now, a lot of people may hate what I did with him (her), but I personally think it works, don't be afraid to get a bit creative with histories/identities.

[CritHit]

Saber

Info:
Name: Hrolf Kraki
Class: Saber
Alignment: Lawful Good
Origin: Scandanavia
Likes: Honor, Gold, Muscular Men
Dislikes: Nerds, Sneaky types
Armament: Sword

Stats:
Str: B
End: B
Agi: C
Mana: C
Luck: C
N.Phant.: A

Skills:
Class:
- Magic Resistance (B)
- Riding (B)

Personal:
- Berserk (A)
A composite skill of Bravery and Mad Enhancement. Physical stats are all given a "+" modifier, and there is an additional power up to physical attacks. While Saber normally keeps her cool, in battle, it has the mental effect of having her focus on batyle, ignoring pain, and giving a additional resistance to mental influences.
-Instinct (A)

Noble Phantasm (s);
Skofnung~Sword of a Beloved Warrior King
Type: Anti-Unit
Rank: B
Target: 1
A overly large broadsword of tempered iron with a furred hilt. This sword possesses no such superb abilities such as firing beams, but does posses a unique feature. Bound to it are the spirits of Hrolf's twelve berserker warriors. This manifests as a powerful curse, not only will any wound not heal until either this NP is destroyed and/or Saber is defeated, the wounds will also slowly get worse. A simple scratch with this blade will become a maiming wound within 24 hours, so obviously if the original wound was serious to begin with, this curse would be quickly fatal. This curse is represented by any wound made by this sword being surrounded by a slowly expanding red aura.

BERSERK Spirit~King of Warriors
Type: Anti-Army
Rank: A
Target: Self
Through invoking the name of this Noble Phantasm, Saber can become the embodiment of a berserker. To understand the concept of this NP, one must understand that it was believed that skilled berserker could have their souls take the form of a bear. As a king of berserkers, of course Kroki could do the same. However, instead of a normal transformation, upon activating this NP, Skofning will become an orb of light, fusing with her chest. This will add the spiritual powers of the twelve in the sword with her own spiritual form. As such, when activated, she becomes a blonde bear the size of a tank and the muzzle of a wolf, with claws the size of longswords.
In this form, Saber is a beast of power close to that of a Phantasmal Beast of Millennium Rank.

Personality:

Spoiler:

Hrolf Kroki is a girl of parallels. She is a noble, collected person, who at the same time possesses a fiery temper and impatient nature. While generally wise in nature, she can be a bit of an airhead at times, and doesn't like thinking too much. Her main go-to solution to a problem is to hit it really hard.

As a noble ruler, she would never let it be known, she loves muscular, burly men. That is the main reason she surrounded herself with berserkers, so she could indulge herself with their company. She would never let any of them know that she loved them romantically however, and she flirts with any man who strikes her fancy.

She does have a wish for the Grail, which is a chance to get revenge on her sister, Skuld, who is the one who led to Sabers demise. As a former king, she does not do well as a "servant" and prefers to boss her Master around. As the average magus is usually more of a scholar, one could say that Saber could never come to terms with serving under one, as she finds those who aren't physically strong to be beneath her. Even if a mage where to show her mighty displays of magic, she would merely call it cheatinf, and scoff at their attempts to impress her. However, if her Master happened to be a muscular man, they would find her more agreeable.

EDIT: Kinda half-assed, but I wrote this out while waiting for my gf to finish up her dental appointment. Tell me what you guys think so far.

[Shiki-pon]

Personal:

- Furosity (A) (If there is a canon version of this, please let me know)
A composite skill of Bravery and Mad Enhancement. Physical stats are all given a "+" modifier, and there is an additional power up to physical attacks. While Saber normally keeps her cool, in battle, it has the mental effect of having her focus on batyle, ignoring pain, and giving a additional resistance to mental influences.

Uhh... Berserk? Beowulf's skill with pretty much that exact effect?

Edit: Not to be rude, but I was just momentarily stunned by the fact that this is almost literally the same Skill. Lookie.

[RoydGolden]

Hrolf Kraki: Berserk is a canon Skill that pretty much encompasses what you had in mind for Furiosity (in fact, they're similar enough I'm a little surprised you came up with it independently). Hrolf was also known as the "Dog-King", so I can't help but feel you missed out on a chance to make her an inumimi loli for extra moe points. Though I guess you already included an animalistic aspect under her second NP...

- - - Updated - - -

Ninja'ed by Shiki-pon

[CritHit]

Cool, I thought there was, but I didn't want to look through the list. Also Royd, Kraki SUCCEEDED the dog king. Trust me, I would have loved to gone down that route.

[Kabalisto Koga]

Furiosity i dont know if it exist a official äquivalent but it sounds like a offensive version of unyielding will, i understand her first Nobelphantasm but is the curse still active after fusing with Kraki ? About her second i must say there you have a little miscalculation Bears are more as three times more mucled as wolvs of the same size and with tank i must say i cant imagine it so good i would compare she in this state more like with other animals like Elephants but this point is only my oppinion.
Just out of curiosity how would she act witj Soichirou as Master ?

[gyrowins]

Okay, this I need to see.

Ask and you shall receive

Saladin was part of the first war. Her master was definitely not based on Dante from the Devil May Cry series

[CritHit]

Uhh... Berserk? Beowulf's skill with pretty much that exact effect?

Edit: Not to be rude, but I was just momentarily stunned by the fact that this is almost literally the same Skill. Lookie.

Oh wow, that is almost exactly the same... huh.

And Royd, I too am surprised I managed to come up with basically the same skill.

[RoydGolden]

Ask and you shall receive

Saladin was part of the first war. Her master was definitely not based on Dante from the Devil May Cry series

That's freaking awesome. I'm not sure where exactly you got the half-phoenix stuff from her history/legend, but either way, really cool.

[Kabalisto Koga]

Ask and you shall receive

Saladin was part of the first war. Her master was definitely not based on Dante from the Devil May Cry series

That's freaking awesome. I'm not sure where exactly you got the half-phoenix stuff from her history/legend, but either way, really cool.

Okay i think my Saladin will be in contrast to this version obviously more conservativ ...

[gyrowins]

The same way Elizabeth got her dragon stuff! Saladin's crest, used in the coat of arms of Egypt, Iraq, and Palestine, is a golden eagle. It wasn't too big a stretch to turn this golden eagle into a Phoenix.

[RoydGolden]

The same way Elizabeth got her dragon stuff! Saladin's crest, used in the coat of arms of Egypt, Iraq, and Palestine, is a golden eagle. It wasn't too big a stretch to turn this golden eagle into a Phoenix.

Yeah, that makes sense (at least by Nasu-logic). Again, very cool stuff.

[Kabalisto Koga]

Yeah, that makes sense (at least by Nasu-logic). Again, very cool stuff.

Okay ,i dont know how Elizabeth has goten her Dragon stuff,and I have never heard that Saladin has a specific crest...
Without to evoke the anger of others here does my Servants go with the nasu logic actually because im unshure but okay i have only seen the animes and read the wiki so far i must admit.

Ps: Roydgolden have you seen my private message, i hope it didnt sounded awkward.

[RoydGolden]

Ps: Roydgolden have you seen my private message, i hope it didnt sounded awkward.

I did, but I wasn't exactly sure what your question was. Did you mean to ask me what I think is the upper limit on how powerful a Servant should be?

[King of Padoru]

Probably not as good as it could be. Like it or kill it. Help with the FC would be appreciated.

"Ah, another wonderful day of hunting! Hm? Are you again with that bitter expresion in your eyes, Master? When you look at me like this, I can't help but remember the taste of bile... I'm sure your liver is juicy juicy with lots of it! Too bad I can't eat it yet."

Lancer
Identity: Spearfinger
Also known as: U`tlûñ'ta, Nûñ’yunu’ï
Height: 166 cm
Weight: 54 kg (self-proclaimed)
Alignment: Neutral Evil
Attribute: Earth
Origin: Cherokee legends, America
Weapon: Finger
Likes: Livers, high places
Dislikes: Chickadees
Talents: Deception
Natural enemy: Nûñ’yunu’wï

Parameters:
Strength: B
Endurance: A
Agility: D
Mana: C
Luck: E
NP: C

Background

Spearfinger is a Cherokee figure that lived along the eastern side of Tennessee and the western of North Carolina. Her Cherokee name means “she had it sharp”, as a reference to the forefinger of her right hand, which resembles a spear (hence the English name) or an obsidian knife. Her other name,

Stone Dress

Nûñ’yunu’ï

comes from her stony skin that arrows couldn’t pierce.

A monster that loves human livers, Spearfinger would be guided to the villages by the smoke coming from the valleys, or catch victims that wandered for a drink at a stream or to pick strawberries. Once she arrived to the village, she would disguise as an old woman and approach the children, combing their hair and lulling them to sleep. Because the Cherokee knew of her, they were cautious about strangers, so her disguise took the form of a villager. Sometimes, she’d transform into her victim and replace them until the family fell asleep so she could devour their livers. Her modus operandi consisted on a quick and painless stab in the back of the neck or through the heart that left no scar. Several days after, the victims die of illness.

It is said that Spearfinger tried to build once a bridge that went through the air from

the Tree Rock

Nûñyû’-tlu`gûñ’yï

over to

the Whiteside Mountain

Sanigilâ’gī

. The Higher Beings were irritated by this because the bridge came close to the Upper World and struck it with lightning.

Her greatest enemy is Nûñ’yunu’wï, the Stone Man. As a fellow rock being, his favorite dish is human livers, therefore, they compete against each other for their food. They can feel their relation when they pass each other because they sing the same song. Spearfinger knows Nûñ’yunu’wï is a man because he sings the same song as her but in a low voice that shakes the ground. That song, that Spearfinger loves to sing when sitting at the top of a mountain with her friend, a lone raven, and that she uses to scare and taunt people, goes like this:

"Uwe la na tsiku. Su sa sai.
Liver, I eat it. Su sa sai.
Uwe la na tsiku. Su sa sai."

The Cherokee called a great council including Tomotley, Tenase, Setico, and Chota towns, all of them haunted by Spearfinger. The medicine man explained how to detect and attract the liver eater, now that they knew about her finger. They baited her with smoke and saw through her disguise by throwing a spear at her, which shattered against her skin of rock. Running towards the humans, she fell into their pit trap. From among a flock of birds that came to aid the Cherokee, a titmouse told them to aim for the heart. The weapons broke when they hit the chest, and the bird had its tongue cut as a punishment. But the titmouse hadn't lied, it hadn't been specific enough. A chickadee landed on the woman's right hand, and a spear skewered her wrist. Her heart was actually there, and not where normal creatures have it. The curse of the Spearfinger was finished.

Because of this legend, titmouses are known as liar birds, while chickadees are said to speak the truth. Even after Spearfinger's death, the Cherokee continued using her name to scare kids, like the Bogeyman or the Sack Man.

Personality

A cunning master of deception and a hunter of humans, Spearfinger can't help but look down on people. If she had to compare herself with an animal, she'd undoubtedly choose a wolf wearing a sheep's hide to enter the flock unnoticed. This way of thinking derives into overconfidence and arrogance, relying on her capacity to deceive others to do as she pleases. Even if her Master doesn't like it, she'll indulge herself in the livers of innocent citizens, believing firmly that she will never be caught. The only method to stop her is a Command Spell. Her favorite type of place to be summoned would have mountains or skyscrapers, so she can sit at their top and sing her dark song during all the night.

Since humans are just her food, she can't just obey them. Therefore, unless a strange event occurs and the Master happens to be not a person, but an animal or a creature, the only thing she'll do will be refraining herself from preying on them. Curiously, kids are an exception. She will immediately deny it if asked about it, but she actually likes and is very good with children. Could these be her maternal instincts manifesting?

Skills

Class skills

Magic Resistance C

Innate resistance to magecraft for Spearfinger being a creature of nature instead of a normal human.

Personal skills

Monstrous Strength B
A temporary rank-up in Strength can be obtained from one’s nature as a monster or Demonic Beast. Because of this skill’s origins, a higher rank lowers the qualification as a Divine Spirit. Spearfinger can pick large boulders effortlessly, break them, stack them, and morph them together.

Song of Livers C
The dreadful song in which rock beings sing about war, huntings, and eating livers to scare and taunt humans. A mental attack that can be used to provoke or weaken enemies.

Shapeshift C+
The ability to borrow bodies and change appearance. A power of the vampire possessed by ancient foxes and badgers in the Far East. Spearfinger took the shape of people, mostly elder women, to fool villagers. Some versions of the legend also say she could take the form of animals.

Noble Phantasm

Nûñ’yunu’ï

Dress of stone

Type: Anti-Unit (Self)
Rank: C+
Description:
Spearfinger's nature as a rock being has given her this innate Noble Phantasm. Counting with a skin of stone, any weapon that attempted to pierce or cut her flesh would break, let it be a spear or an arrow. This has resulted in a continuously active defensive Noble Phantasm. When facing slashes or stabs, a rank of Strength equivalent or superior to B must be performed to bypass this armor. Other kind of attacks aren't affected by this Noble Phantasm, except for a slight reduction of damage.
Generally speaking, protections that make the body impervious to attacks have a weak spot, let it be the heel, a spot at the back, or the navel. In Spearfinger's case, it's her right wrist, where the heart is located. Due to her fighting style, it's hard to strike it while engaging in close combat. Another flaw of this Noble Phantasm is that it remains active when she is transformed.

U`tlûñ'ta

The sharp forefinger that hunts livers

Type: Anti-Unit
Rank: C
Description:
Spearfinger's characteristic finger. Long, black, and pointed, it's as if an obsidian lance had been grafted in her hand. Boasting a hardness superior to that of the rest of the body, this flesh needle is as lethal as normal spears. Although the finger has more than enough sharpness to cleave flesh and bone, receiving an attack from it won't leave any wound at all. Damage won't be felt immediately either. After some time, an excruciating pain, similar to poisoning, will be felt, and constant damage will be received. If nothing is done, chances of eventually dying through this pain are high.
The usual length of the finger is about 20 centimeters, but can be temporarily extended up to 1 meter to perform a medium-range attack. Unfortunately, it's impossible to shrink it to the size of an average finger, not even while Spearfinger is transformed.

Relations

Gaius Julius Caesar:"What was the name of that thing humans do with the livers of fat geese? Foie-gras, was it? I bet I can make some of that with this man! He's already fat, so I won't have to feed him! Lucky me!"
Achilles, Siegfried, Karna: "Hard! I can't pierce their bodies! What kind of armor do they have?!"
Spartacus, Leonidas I: "Ugh, so much muscle! Their livers won't be juicy at all!"
Shuten-douji:"Even if she was a human, I'd never eat her liver. It must be completely rotten from drinking so much."
Enkidu: "Hmmm... Your body is like clay... I thought you were a human, but you don't even have a liver. How sad..."
Jack the Ripper (Assassin): "Hm? You just dissected a human and you're giving me the liver? Thank you..."

[SleepMode]

You might want to revise the formatting, BL often does this from time to time.

[Kabalisto Koga]

I did, but I wasn't exactly sure what your question was. Did you mean to ask me what I think is the upper limit on how powerful a Servant should be?

I meant what is your detailed Feedback about Suhrawardi as Servant Profile Master and if he is to overpowered.
Ps: I hope i can make once a such detailrich ,wonderfull Profile like your Alter Justinian .