Create-A-Servant 2

[Kabalisto Koga]

Somehow, I'm not surprised. Only disappointed.

Do you just habitually ask for advice or do you ask for it because its so fun to ignore it afterwards?

I just ask not more or less to become better,but Goliath is one of my most overpowered Charackters ...maybe i should post his profil after my more medium strenght Servants...


About you Question Roydgolden: i have nowhere read that he fought against Typhon or Behemoth but i posses a eye to see the history in the shadows - i want to make him the embodiment of a Hero that accomplished great deeds but was defeated by the destiny at the end and followed the same destiny of his Deities.

Little forshadowing/taste:He will fight as Archer against Herakless as Lancer and in a other Story Goliath and Boudice notice some similarities on each other and develope a Knight-romance like Dhiarmuid and Arthoria in Zero.

[King of Padoru]

About you Question Roydgolden: i have nowhere read that he fought against Typhon or Behemoth but i posses a eye to see the history in the shadows - i want to make him the embodiment of a Hero that accomplished great deeds but was defeated by the destiny at the end and followed the same destiny of his Deities.

In other words, you don't care about lore or anything and just make up everything so that he looks cool

[Kabalisto Koga]

In other words, you don't care about lore or anything and just make up everything so that he looks cool

No i dont watch to make my Servants "as cool as possible" im just like some Writhers(Shakespear included) that are slaves to their Imagination and pen if im honest and i just inclose Details that are harmonize with the official lore and i bet im not the only one here that do this.

[RoydGolden]

No i dont watch to make my Servants "as cool as possible" im just like some Writhers(Shakespear included) that are slaves to their Imagination and pen if im honest and i just inclose Details that are harmonize with the official lore and i bet im not the only one here that do this.

Creatively interpreting a legend is one thing, but you're just making details up entirely. At that point you're not really making Goliath as a Servant, you're making an OC who happens to share a name with a mythical figure.

[forumghost]

Creatively interpreting a legend is one thing, but you're just making details up entirely. At that point you're not really making Goliath as a Servant, you're making an OC who happens to share a name with a mythical figure.

I mean to be fair have you read Nasu!Medusa's backstory?

The problem is less doing things that don't match the actual legends and more that this is a Max Wank version of such a footnote of a character.

[RoydGolden]

Yes, Nasu does things like that too (like Drake stealing a grail from Poseidon or Dantes fighting Roa) but it shouldn't be a major part of his official lore and definitely shouldn't factor into his Skills and NPs.

[Bird of Hermes]

There’s nasu-ing the lore a bit then there’s making up stuff and making a sheet around that. No matter how you stretch it, Goliath was just a big guy who likes to punch things who got rekt by an underfed teen and his pet rock. Like my old Berserker sheet was more fitting and I’m not a fan of most of my older stuff.

[RoydGolden]

Also, while it might feel like making things up would equate to more creativity, in reality the opposite can be true. A lot of the creativity in making a Servant sheet (at least IMO) is figuring out how best to interpret the hero's legend to fit into the Fate format. There's all kinds of cool historical anecdotes I've come across looking for NPs and Skills that'd be totally lost if I just settled for making something up.

For instance, there's a legend that Goliath's sword was passed down to Galahad in Arthurian mythology as the sword 'Strange Straps'. Now, there's a lot of cool places you could go with that legend, like making it a sword that bridges the concepts of Paganism and Judeo-Christianity, but you totally missed out on that by just giving him a generic demon sword with the flimsiest justification. Granted, the sheet is still unfinished, so maybe you'll add more on that later, but my point still stands that creativity doesn't always mean just making things up. Sometimes, you can be far more creative when forced to work within an existing framework (after all, you can't think "outside the box" without a box).

[WhatShouldNotBe]

.... would making the Opportunity Rover a Heroic Spirit be a bit too far-fetched?

[pinetree]

Maybe but I love the idea, please do it.

[Historia]

.... would making the Opportunity Rover a Heroic Spirit be a bit too far-fetched?

Only if it isn't a tsundere loli that likes collecting and analyzing mineral samples.

Also it'd belong in the Modern Servants thread, so gtfo

Somehow, I'm not surprised. Only disappointed.

Do you just habitually ask for advice or do you ask for it because its so fun to ignore it afterwards?

Stop caring so much.

[King of Padoru]

For instance, there's a legend that Goliath's sword was passed down to Galahad in Arthurian mythology as the sword 'Strange Straps'. Now, there's a lot of cool places you could go with that legend, like making it a sword that bridges the concepts of Paganism and Judeo-Christianity, but you totally missed out on that by just giving him a generic demon sword with the flimsiest justification. Granted, the sheet is still unfinished, so maybe you'll add more on that later, but my point still stands that creativity doesn't always mean just making things up. Sometimes, you can be far more creative when forced to work within an existing framework (after all, you can't think "outside the box" without a box).

Something related with the Demon Pillar Zagan could have been nice too, as Zagan is supposed to come from Dagon and Goliath had an image of Dagon in his heart. It'd still be wanked, but at least it's more accurate than fighting Typhon

[Shiki-pon]

Caster Mirabilis
“Hm, I’ve manifested as a Caster. Try and make this a learning experience, Master.”
Servant Class: Caster
Alignment: Neutral Good
Origin: Europe (13th century)
Armament: Book

Parameters:
STR: E
END: E
AGI: E
MANA: B
LUCK: C
NP: B

Skills

Class Skills:

Territory Creation - Rank B: The Skill to build a special terrain that is advantageous to oneself as a magus, such as for the purpose of collecting mana.
As a splendid but not outstanding magus, the creation of a 'Workshop' becomes possible.

Item Construction - Rank B: The Skill to manufacture magical items, from implements of war to items for daily use. Also, this Skill requires time to gather components and manufacture items.
As an accomplished alchemist and magus, Caster can create many different types of items. Spellbooks and other literature-type items created by him are especially potent.

Personal Skills:

Information Erasure - Rank C++: The removal of information regarding the Servant's True Name, abilities, and appearance from the records and memories of all eye witnesses, including the opponent, following the conclusion of an engagement.
Due to his role in the Mage’s Association, Caster’s ‘Information Erasure’ can affect almost any individual that he has knowledge of, removing knowledge of them from the minds of others. The effect is vastly amplified when the information erased relates to the supernatural. As an additional effect, the process of information removal creates a skeptical opinion in those affected.
In life, through the use of scientific proofs and other works, Caster helped hide the presence of Magi in society, aiding in the preservation of Thaumaturgy’s Mystery. Although, as a proud Magus, Caster never really made much of an effort to hide his own presence or squash rumors relating to his magical prowess. When manifested as a Servant, he refuses to use ‘Information Erasure’ to remove information concerning himself from the minds of others.

High-Speed Divine Words (False) - Rank E: Originally a Skill that assists with magical incantations via a power to activate Thaumaturgy without the use of Magic Circuits. The language of the Age of Gods, back when words played a heavy role in spellcasting. As such, it is a power long lost by modern magi. It is particularly useful for direct attack magic.
In Caster’s case, he has managed to recover bits and pieces of information regarding Divine Words from many European mythologies, and understood some of what he found through his study of linguistics. However, as the power of Divine Words had fully faded by the time Caster was alive, his findings remained purely of personal interest without practical applications.
Caster's knowledge of Divine Words can essentially be used for the same purpose as a low-ranking ‘High-Speed Incantation’ for the purposes of using Magecraft. Caster can also use this Skill to augment the items he makes using ‘Item Creation’.

Revelation - Rank D-: Existing as a Skill to "hear the voice of heavens" and take optimum action; a Skill equivalent to Instinct, a sixth sense regarding battles. However, 'Revelation' accommodates all matters related to the achievement of a goal (for instance, choosing the most suitable path while traveling).
Uniquely, however, it is not Caster himself that possesses this Skill. Through the use of ‘Item Construction’, he can create a Brazen Head, a sort of oracular effigy that answers questions regarding the future, powered by a summoned spirit. As such, the Skill is completely useless in terms of usage in battle.

Noble Phantasms

Opus Majus:The Great Work
Anti-Wisdom, Magecraft; Rank A

Written in Latin at the request of Pope Clement IV, Opus Majus is Caster’s greatest work, being an explanation and a treatise on his works. The 840-page treatise ranges over all aspects of natural science, from grammar and logic to mathematics, physics, and philosophy. The Noble Phantasm version of the Opus Majus also includes his later works.
In addition to his public works, however, Caster also wrote another Opus Majus on the subject of Magecraft. In this grimoire, he discussed his findings on the subjects of alchemy, astronomy, divination, summoning and his research on Divine Words among other things. This version of the Opus Majus served as a primer in Clock Tower’s General Fundamentals department for quite some time and is still in use in the present day. The contents of this Opus Majus are included in the Noble Phantasm’s contents.
In effect, Opus Majus functions as a repository of information of all sorts. It is normally continually active, but the correct chapter and page must be found for the knowledge contained within to be accessed. Essentially, given enough time Caster can find or reason his way to almost any information, including the True Names of other Servants. In regards to discovering the identities of Heroic Spirits, the older, higher in Mystery and closer to Europe’s area of influence the Servant is, the faster the process of identification will be. Conversely, Heroic Spirits from far outside the European area of influence are harder to identify.
By invoking the Noble Phantasm’s true name, however, Caster can boost the power and efficiency of his Magecraft. Under certain circumstances, effects approaching (but not quite reaching) the level of True Magic may be manifested. These circumstances deal with the surrounding area (such as Caster’s own workshop), confluences of celestial bodies and so on.

Description

Likes: Novelty, research
Dislikes: Doctrines not based on empiricism, missed opportunities
Talents: High-speed writing, subterfuge
Natural Enemy: Albertus Magnus, Alexander of Hales

Caster’s true identity is Roger Bacon, the Doctor Mirabilis.

At his heart, Bacon is forthright and direct, even combative in his manner. He is also rather caustic and lacking in respect towards people of higher social rank. He acts more kindly towards those of a scholarly persuasion, including Magi.
He is proud of having qualified as Caster and is smug about the fact that many of his contemporaries, Magi and scholars alike, did not. His greatest love is knowledge, research and the discovery of the new. When summoned to the modern era, he would most likely immerse himself into discovering all that he could about advancements in science and society. He does still recognize his status as a Servant, and thus wishes to aid his Master in whatever way he can.
Though he promoted cooperation with the Church, he became embittered by the bans on teaching certain ideas. Thus, his opinion on Servants with connections to religion is low. This low opinion also applies to Aristotle, oddly enough, given the mess his teachings caused during the middle-ages.
His wish to the Holy Grail would most likely be for true incarnation, as he could then explore the world at his leisure.

Bacon is plain in appearance, looking like an adult man in his thirties or forties. He has a serious expression on his face, is clean shaven and has tonsured, brown hair and brown eyes.
Bacon dresses in a brown monastic robe with heavy sleeves, sandals as well as a heavy cowl around his shoulders. A white cord is tied around the robe’s waist, and from it hangs a large rosary. Bacon almost always carries his book, Opus Majus, in his arms.

Lore

Roger Bacon was an English Franciscan philosopher and educational reformer who was a major medieval proponent of experimental science. In addition to this, he was also magus in a high position in the Mage’s Association’s Clock Tower branch.
While he genuinely wished to promote empirical science and instigate certain religious and academical reforms, he was also tasked by the Association with helping Magi slip further away from the public eye so as to preserve the Mystery of Magecraft. Through the use of scientific publishments, he managed to aid in dispelling society’s belief in magic.
He was also a major proponent of cooperation with the Church thanks to his background, even working under Pope Clement IV, in part for the purpose of bringing the Church and the Magi closer together. His conciliatory efforts, however, ended in failure due to the death of Clement IV and the Condemnations of 1277.
Later in life, he was imprisoned due to his works and teachings. After being released, he retired to teach at Oxford until his death.

Notes

I admit I might’ve wanked his power up a little. Most of the wanking was stream-of-thought, though, not that it makes it any better
Still, I tried not to include anything that has no basis whatsoever on his recorded (and apocryphal) deeds and works.

The stuff with the Mage’s Association is of course pure embellishment, but since he was alive during the era that Magi were starting to remove themselves from society… I guess it isn’t too much of a stretch that his scientific works could’ve served a purpose in disproving Magecraft and thus helping hide Magi from the public eye. As far as timelines go, the masquerade was in full effect by the 1500s, given that Paracelsus was killed to uphold it.

As for the (apparently) hated + -modifiers, especially in Information Erasure, I figured that a double plus would signify an unorthodox usage (people other than himself), the ability to reach people after the fact, the atmosphere of skepticism the Skill creates as well as the increased effect when dealing with Mystery.
I also wondered whether or not I should include Revelation as its own Skill or just mention it as a footnote in Item Construction. The brazen head dealy is a legitimate legend, so I figured it might merit a Skill of its own, even if it is locked until certain conditions are fulfilled. As an afterthough I might as well have named the skill Brazen Head instead and given it conditional effect similar to Revelation.

With his in-depth research into linguistics (especially with his focus on understanding rather than just learning languages), he just might’ve pieced together enough information to glimpse at Divine Words. The mention of abilities close to True Magic in his NP is also based on his understanding of Divine Words. Essentially, if the area/time he is working in at any point possesses enough Mystery, he might have a window where he’s able to fully utilize Divine Words.

I also apologize for some of the inaccuracies/liberties in the Lore section. I didn’t bother doing too much research into his personal history.

[Kabalisto Koga]

Something related with the Demon Pillar Zagan could have been nice too, as Zagan is supposed to come from Dagon and Goliath had an image of Dagon in his heart. It'd still be wanked, but at least it's more accurate than fighting Typhon

Hmm i will try to consider everyones suggestions although my Goliath is quite finished and i wanted to give him a deep Background that can be compared with the from Herakless and make him the Avenger of the Paganism and the Phalanx of their revenge.

One Question at everyone :Which Hougu and capabilities would Herakless have as Rider /Lancer and in which points is he differing as Archer with his Alter Form/Version Alcides?

[King of Padoru]

The problem with Goliath is that there's nothing in his lore that can make you say he can rival Heracles except the fact that both are big guys. You can't just add the first thing that comes to your head because you want him to be top tier when there isn't any reason for him to be so. Of course, there are cases in which a historically low-average tier can become high tier , but they're justified with proper skills or NPs, like Apocrypha's Vlad with Demonic Defender of the State.
If you want Goliath to be somewhat better than his historical self, some suggestions that can work are: the Legend of Dracula route (transformation NP), Innocent Monster (transfiguration due to history shitting on him), and the Zagan thing I proposed before.

[RoydGolden]

The problem with Goliath is that there's nothing in his lore that can make you say he can rival Heracles except the fact that both are big guys. You can't just add the first thing that comes to your head because you want him to be top tier when there isn't any reason for him to be so. Of course, there are cases in which a historically low-average tier can become high tier , but they're justified with proper skills or NPs, like Apocrypha's Vlad with Demonic Defender of the State.
If you want Goliath to be somewhat better than his historical self, some suggestions that can work are: the Legend of Dracula route (transformation NP), Innocent Monster (transfiguration due to history shitting on him), and the Zagan thing I proposed before.

An NP like Vlad's Legend Of Dracula could work, where he gains power but slowly transforms into a hideous fish-monster like how Dagon was described in H.P Lovecraft's mythology (and like Vlad, he'd probably hate to invoke it, considering it a blasphemy to his god). To justify it, you could reference the legend of how his heart bore an image of Dagon, combined with something about how in ancient times a contest between warriors from different societies was really a battle between their respective gods. That's what I thought of when I considered writing up a Goliath sheet, anyways.

[pinetree]

Hmm i will try to consider everyones suggestions although my Goliath is quite finished and i wanted to give him a deep Background that can be compared with the from Herakless and make him the Avenger of the Paganism and the Phalanx of their revenge.

If you wanted this Servant to be a revengeful representation of paganism you should have made his kit specialized in going against current deities exclusively instead of all that... stuff, and also chosen someone that is much more related to paganism than a biblical character.

You should use Edison as an inspiration, take a figure that is important to paganism or famously hates Christianity, make old gods empower him specifically to counter current faiths and religions, and make sure to keep those abilities still connected to the original Heroic Spirit. Just like Edison was empowered by the American presidents to fight the celts while still retaining his personality and abilities related to his history.

But I doubt that's actually what you want, if you want to make an edgy super-powered servant that's okay too, just take someone who actually fits that and work with them instead of that one biblical giant who was killed with a stone.

[RoydGolden]

So, Koga's Goliath sheet renewed my inspiration to try to write up my own take on the guy. I'd like some advice regarding possible NPs though. I've already given him an NP based on the legend where his heart bore an image of Dagon, but I'd also like to give him his sword as an NP (I'm making Goliath a Saber, rather then the more conventional Berserker) and I'm looking for some ideas on how to flesh it out.

I'd like to do something related to the concept of a sword that bridges Paganism and Monotheism (originally belonging to a Pagan giant and then falling into the hands of a Jewish king and later Christian knight), but I'm not sure what that would amount to as an actual effect and I don't just want to make it into another generic beam-sword NP. Any ideas?

[Bird of Hermes]

So, Koga's Goliath sheet renewed my inspiration to try to write up my own take on the guy. I'd like some advice regarding possible NPs though. I've already given him an NP based on the legend where his heart bore an image of Dagon, but I'd also like to give him his sword as an NP (I'm making Goliath a Saber, rather then the more conventional Berserker) and I'm looking for some ideas on how to flesh it out.

I'd like to do something related to the concept of a sword that bridges Paganism and Monotheism (originally belonging to a Pagan giant and then falling into the hands of a Jewish king and later Christian knight), but I'm not sure what that would amount to as an actual effect and I don't just want to make it into another generic beam-sword NP. Any ideas?

I'll voice a few as I'm not interested in remaking my own sheet.

Heart of Dagon NP ala Legend of Dracula sounds good.
As for the Strange Straps sword, I'd have it alternate between demonic and holy sword. Aspects of Healing and destruction and all that probably. Or maybe twin swords? Or just give abilities of a demon god pillar but nerfed.

Perhaps a negative skill like Tristan, like Weakness (Projectiles) maybe?

[RoydGolden]

As for the Strange Straps sword, I'd have it alternate between demonic and holy sword. Aspects of Healing and destruction and all that probably. Or maybe twin swords? Or just give abilities of a demon god pillar but nerfed.

That sounds cool. I'll probably go with either twin holy and demonic swords or just one that changes attribute. Thanks!