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Thread: Create-A-Servant 2

  1. #4561
    "Twoja muzyka obróci się w nicość!" Skull's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RoydGolden View Post
    Out of curiosity, how'd ya think he'd get along with my own Beethoven?
    Actually, your Beethoven isn't far away from how he is portrayed in ClassicaLoid. I'd seriously recommend it for any fans of Classical music.
    Spoiler:


    But as to how they'd get along, pretty poorly I'd imagine. Bach is a serious soul who dislikes showmanship and the like.

  2. #4562
    Κύρια Ἐλέησον Seika's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by venomking View Post
    Grammar mainly, also I'd like to add, that part of the reason I don't do a whole lots of information on my charachters I make up is with the idea of people making fanfiction of them in mind, I create just enough info to allow you to have a basic understanding of and what she is, but I feel deeply that it is more interested for fan fiction righter to fill in her larger story them selves there not tied to just one basic storyline for her, I give you the tool for her, but the story of her is up to you, think about the amazing ideas you can come up with, when my character when my charachter is supposed to be the first person to ever commit suicide, cursed to cause people to commit the horrible act against her own wishes, and eventually she will be responsible for the end of life, is that not a good backstory? Perfectos to that peaple can create their own histrionics ro her, and have enough pf a sad backstory all adybtherebto make peaple ahve sympathy and grow onto her as a charachter.
    Quote Originally Posted by venomking View Post
    I feel I should explain the whole spirits thing, it's actually something I took from another religion couldn't name if I tried thou, but yes your right and wrong, she's essentially a random choice of twelve powerful spirits who if sommuned Ina holy grail are always summoned as death, but they are basicly teh keys tod earths cell and if any of them got together death coudk likely use them to escape, by death I mea the true death, she's Bastille like assasin from fate, she's death buts she's not, she is the first human to commit Sucide, this she is forever cursed to chase suicide server she goes, silently waiting patiently coming peaple untell tehy are nothing but a deprrsed shell ready to jump out a window or something, her abut lies aren't really taht snaked out ether, the synth could be blocked, the crow phanatsm is basicly uselss as an Actul, attack since litterly a vast Magritte of heroes would just win, as they always tend do with those kind of hints,it s basicly like saying here's riddle I doubt you'll ever solve, and becuase there a hero they'll solve, they'll just create a clever game she can't win. It's basic just a way to get a quick heal for her. Deaths sweet embrace is EX as no matter what a servent will be damaged, and it's makes since for her story, it's a crytsilzation of teh way she kills.
    Look, the Servant sheet was objectively bad and full of your usual language problems, but I honestly willing to give it a bit of a pass, because it's not actually our job to police C-a-S sheet quality (or most people in this thread would be banned) and the English was at least better than before. You seemed to have begun to make an effort.

    Then you came out with these posts and, I'm sorry, but we have repeatedly told you to write posts that other people can actually read and engage with. To not do so is fundamentally a demonstration of disrespect toward the rest of the forum. We have plenty of ESL people, phone-posters, and so on who manage to do better than this; your single excuse so far has been to blame a malfunctioning autocorrect which you allegedly turned off without any improvement in the standard of your English. That much won't do. It's glib and unacceptable.

    This is a strike on your record.
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  3. #4563
    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Servant Assassin:

    True Name: Cain 'The First Murderer'

    Alignment: Chaotic "Evil" (closer to Chaotic Good in truth)

    Alternate Class: Berserker

    Strength- C+
    Agility- E
    Endurance- D
    Mana- A
    Luck- E
    NP- EX

    Appearance:

    By Corialicetale on DeviantART

    Personality: A cold and aloof man, tormented by guilt over his past actions. Though his role as the first murderer has made Assassin's name synonymous with wickedness itself, his true character is far more complex then such base impressions. His nature is not a bloodstained demon who rejoices in carnage, but a young man born in an age too innocent to understand the terrible finality of death, whose single act of impulsive anger stole away everything that he held dear.

    He grieves his younger sister Abel deeply and would do anything in the faintest hopes of bringing her back and undoing his most grievous sin. At heart, Assassin despises himself for his actions and does not have any qualms over how history has twisted him into a monster, saying such a portrayal is only deserved for one as rotten as he.

    Though he puts on an amoral front, describing himself as the kind of person who wouldn't risk his life for his fellow man, Assassin is ultimately a kind and caring individual who will put everything on the line for a chance to atone.

    Being a quintessential angsty bad-boy with a heart of gold, Assassin is excellent at attracting unwanted female attention wherever he goes. Given his gruff personality he pays no mind to any of his admirers, but of course that just encourages them even more. Ah, the whimsy of the female heart~

    He also holds a soft spot for girls who remind him of his sister, with golden hair and emerald green eyes, including a certain King of Knights incidentally.

    If summoned alongside Abel in her distorted state, Assassin will express revulsion and horror over what his once pure and innocent sister has become. And of course, even more guilt for having shaped her into such a monster. He will first try to "save her" from herself no matter the cost, and if all else fails insure that he is the only one to kill her once more and put her out of her misery.

    Likes: solitude, Abel
    Dislikes: himself, death, anything that reminds him of Abel
    Talents: tilling the earth, murder
    Natural Enemy: little sister


    Class Skills:

    Presence Concealment- N/A
    Measures the ability to cut off one's presence as a Heroic Spirit. However, the efficacy of this Skill drops sharply the moment one prepares to attack.

    Despite being what can be considered the first and foremost "assassin" in human history, Cain does not possess this Skill due to having committed his single murder with the full trust of his victim and without any need to disguise his presence.

    Instead, Assassin's ability to suppress his murderous intentions before striking has been sublimated into an altogether different Skill.


    Personal Skills:

    Suppression- A++
    A natural talent to suppress one's killing intent. At this rank, even the strongest murderous intention from Assassin is effectively impossible to discern until the very moment where he attacks- upon which it is very likely too late.

    Assassin's possession of this Skill reflects how his first and only murder was committed against one who knew and trusted him more then anyone. Even as he lured Abel to the wilderness to kill her, she never harbored even a single doubt to her brother's intentions until the very moment the dagger pierced her heart.

    Eternal Wanderer- A
    Nature of one cursed to forever wander the earth. A composite including Independent Action and Nature Of A Rebellious Spirit at the same rank, while also imposing a curse of famine upon Assassin's surroundings. His very presence depletes magical energy from the natural world. Plantlife withers to nothing around him and the soil beneath his feet becomes dry and barren, incapable of bearing life.

    For the horrendous act of slaying his own sister, Assassin was doomed by God to travel the earth as a fugitive and vagabond with no rightful dwelling to call his own. The very earth which opened its maw to accept his sister's blood then forever after refused to yield to his labor, a perpetual reminder of his sin.

    Aptitude For Slaughter (All)- A+++
    A Skill qualifying one's aptitude for killing, expressed through various means. In this case, it conceptualizes Assassin's supreme authority as mankind's first murderer. Due to the principle by which originals exceed imitations, Assassin boasts uncontested mastery over all forms and methods of bloodshed.

    Assassin's proficiency for murder is unconstrained by any particular weapon, tool or technique. Any object in his hands that can be even remotely conceptualized as a "murder weapon" is automatically reshaped into its ideal form for killing. Pens, umbrellas, kitchen utensils, lawnmower blades and even pieces of scenery; all become deadly weapons made to claim the lives of human beings in Assassin's hands. While such tools remain below the level of true Noble Phantasms, differing from the similar ability possessed by a certain Knight Of The Round Table, they receive a potent Anti-Human attribute which greatly increases damage dealt.

    This Anti-Human attribute is also applied even when Assassin fights barehanded. As the first murderer, the mark of killing is engraved even into his very flesh.

    As his sister's murder is a deed Assassin feels nothing but shame for, he regards this Skill as a curse and bitter reminder of the sin he despises himself for. Rather then a blessing, he embraces it as something akin to self-flagellation.

    In the Berserker Class, this would manifest as the "ultimate slasher Skill" which allows him to bring forth an unending array of gory deaths through just about any means imaginable. Such debauched creativity from the pioneer of murder would surely make even the most diabolical of horror movie villains blush. However, since the Assassin which most closely exemplifies his true character in life is disgusted by his macabre "talent" and utterly refuses to utilize it to its fullest potential, such applications of this Skill have been mostly sealed.

    Natural Body- E
    Possession of a (once) flawless human body from birth. At this rank, Strength is merely given a + modifier.

    Alongside his sister, Assassin was one of the first humans descended directly from Adam and Eve, boasting a physique unblemished by the faults of modern humanity.

    However, the curse placed upon him for killing Abel has led to his rank in this Skill declining nearly to nonexistence.

    Eye Of The Mind (False)- D+
    Resistance to changes of visibility caused by visual interferences. Also called the sixth sense, or prescience; an innate talent to sense danger.

    Assassin's legendary ties to bloodshed and killing have granted him a limited ability to sense hostile intent from others and react accordingly. While it is only a low rank due to not being a sense he ever refined in life, it nonetheless is enough to allow him to fight evenly with some Servants despite his rather low stats.


    Noble Phantasms:


    Resith Ra'tsach- For Cain Took His Sister To The Field And Slew Her (D/A, Anti-Unit): A Noble Phantasm crystallizing the most infamous and defining moment in Assassin's legend, the jealousy-driven murder of his sister Abel. Taking shape as the very ritual dagger that she'd used for animal sacrifices- and the same one that he'd plunged into her heart- participation in the primordial act of killing has left the originally humble tool irrevocably tainted with evil.

    It now appears as a wildly jagged and blood-red dagger, seeming as if to pulse with murderous intent once drawn. Invoked by Assassin's reaching into his own chest and spiritually drawing it out, it is a rotten and dreadful weapon incarnating the concept of "murder" or "wrongful killing". In basic combat it merely displays the properties of an ordinary dagger raised to phantasmic tier, strong enough to intercept attacks from other Heroic Spirits but otherwise unexceptional in every way except appearance. However, three criteria must be fulfilled before this Noble Phantasm's true power manifests, in effect reenacting the conditions behind Assassin's murder of Abel.

    These are- the target must have a Good alignment (which may or may not imply being actually a good person, see Gilgamesh), the target must trust Assassin at the time of attack and the strike itself must be performed dishonorably (i.e without declaring a proper duel beforehand). When these three criteria are met and the dagger pierces the opponent's body, it foists the concept of "wrongful death" upon the foe directly for a certain kill bypassing all forms of defense.

    A disdainful Noble Phantasm perfect for the Assassin Class, which specializes in sneak attacks and subterfuge. However, as this Noble Phantasm reminds Assassin of his deep guilt over the death of his sister, he refuses to even draw out the weapon under most circumstances. Only if forced by a Command Seal or absolutely necessary for victory will Assassin even consider utilizing this vile trump card.


    Charagma Kayin- Sevenfold He Will Be Avenged (EX, Support): A Noble Phantasm representing the mark placed upon Cain as punishment for killing Abel, forcing him to wander the earth lost and listless for the rest of his life. Not even death could end his suffering, for the presence of the mark insured that any who killed him would receive their own harm sevenfold and he, be revived without harm.

    This "mark" takes the form of an intricate pattern of blood-red runic markings etched across Assassin's entire body from head to toe. A passive Noble Phantasm that activates only when Assassin receives a mortal blow. When this happens, the runes across Assassin's body will glow deeply as any and all damage from the attack is amplified sevenfold and reflected back at the opponent, leaving Assassin himself totally unscathed in the aftermath. A faultless conceptual defense and counter-attack tied up in a single package. What is deflected on the opponent is not physical injuries but "damage" in the abstract, usually translating to internal damage to organs and the like.

    As a curse of retribution directly from the Hebrew God, its effects bypass Magic Resistance or protection from curses at any rank and cannot be evaded. However, this Noble Phantasm actualizes only when faced with a "lethal" attack, defined as one sure to end his life unless it activates. It does nothing regarding ordinary damage accrued over the course of battle until it crosses the threshold of "lethality".

    Though seemingly an infallible ability which renders killing Assassin an impossible objective, there are in fact several ways a clever opponent may bypass this Noble Phantasm. Firstly and most obvious is simply to kill his Master and wait for him to fade away without a supply of magical energy. (However, given his high rank in the Independent Action Skill this might just be a long wait)

    Secondly is to somehow trick Assassin into dealing a fatal blow on himself. In a case where "Assassin's killer" and "Assassin himself" are synonymous, the resultant curse will merely amplify Assassin's own injuries sevenfold and reflect them back to him.

    The last(?) and most difficult means of bypassing this Noble Phantasm is to take advantage of how it activates only against a "lethal" attack. As such, it won't invoke in a case where Assassin dies but no one particular attack can be said to have decisively "killed him". If the opponent were to inflict countless grazing blows each one wearing away very slightly at his life-force, then Assassin will eventually perish without any singular "mortal blow" to trigger this Noble Phantasm.

    The way this works is akin to the firing squad paradox in the philosophy of causality. The hail of bullets surely causes the victim's death in spite of the fact that no individual bullet bears essential responsibility.


    Key Words/Craft Essences


    The First Murder
    "I remember blacking out, and the first thing I saw coming to was red.

    The blood of my beloved sister staining her white dress and soaking into the ground.
    Next was the pained expression on her face as she stared up at me, lips twisted into a single question that pierced my heart more cruelly then any knife.


    'Why, big brother? Why?'

    No answer escaped my lips, only a faint wretch of horror.
    The sound of the ritual dagger I'd used in the act clattering to the earth echoed distantly in my awareness, senses numb from shock.
    The blood from the knife soaked through my fingers, dying them red as well.

    'A-Abel!'

    My voice broke into a panicked sob as I reached my hands out to clasp my sister's hand.
    But by the time I'd grasped it, it already hung limp and lifeless.
    The spark of joy and energy in her eyes faded, leaving only empty green orbs.

    The knowledge of what I'd done fell upon me instantly.
    I'd killed someone.
    Taken a life irrevocably from this world, with only an empty, broken carcass remaining behind as if in mockery.
    And not just anyone, but my own sister, the person I cherished more then anything else in the world. All by the act of a jealousy-driven fool.

    ...J-just what kind of monster had I become?"


    Halcyon Days Of Innocence
    "If you were around, I wonder if you'd still remember, little sister.

    The days we shared, laughing innocently and playing together as if the world were really as sweet and gentle a place as we'd always thought it was.
    ...Those times really were great, huh?
    If I could, know that I'd give anything just to relive those days by your side again, Abel.
    To see your smiling face once more, even if only for a fleeting instant.

    But what is lost can never be regained.
    The innocent bliss we'd indulged in had shattered irrevocably in that single moment.
    I, who was cursed to walk the earth in penance, can never again return to that garden of peace, just as a butterfly has discarded its chrysalis.


    ...Even so, I remember the color of that sky as clearly as if it were only yesterday."



    ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    So, I redid my old Cain sheet like I'd been talking about. His newly added Key Words/Craft Essence section is if anything even more edgy/"chuuni" then with Abel, but now that I've decided on a theme no sense in not going whole-hog with it, I suppose. Besides, it does fit the legend.

    As always, be sure to drop by with comments and criticisms! Thanks.
    Last edited by RoydGolden; February 17th, 2017 at 11:36 PM. Reason: Sourced FC (kind of)

  4. #4564
    Pondering for new ideas. Zh1212's Avatar
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    Wow, the revision of Cain came out much faster than I thought. And while the first Key Words/Craft Essence was definitely 'Chunni,' the second one was somewhat of a tearjerker. The NPs were well-done, keeping their powerful potentials in check with specific prerequisites and loopholes. Overall, the update was definitely an improvement over the older version.

    (Looking through the profile makes me think of a Cain Lily idea, where it's before he committed the First Murder, was just simply an aloof, hard-working "Big-Bro" who is absurdly good at taking care of crops. Probably lancer due to using a hoe to farm...)
    Last edited by Zh1212; February 17th, 2017 at 01:55 PM.

  5. #4565
    :thinking: 4score7years's Avatar
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    I actually really like that Cain. Well-developed personality, and one of the most balanced takes on the sevenfold curse. Aptitude for Slaughter works very well for him, and eternal wanderer is good, too. The second of the two craft essences is also really nice; the contrast between the Cain and Abel versions is striking.

    In summation: good stuff all around. Maybe a little verbose but it doesn't really bother me. A great improvement over the original.
    Last edited by 4score7years; February 17th, 2017 at 02:08 PM.

  6. #4566
    リビングデッド Living Dead Hakuro's Avatar
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    For the whole First Assassin stuff, I think his NP affecting only Good people kinda limited. Also to requering the opponent to trust him, that seems to make it much more limited. Like not many Servants would trust an enemy normally (maybe the ~knight~ ones would?), but even these would not trust an Assassin servant, even if by prejudice (honestly, if they are in this class they tried to kill someone and are not noticed by people so yeah). I don't see the scenario of the requisites happening with a Servant, and if does happens, not with more than one.

    But if he goes by the logic of "killing masters" that was the initial thought of the class, I see less chances of any Master trusting him, unless he uses Presence Concealment to pretend to be someone and get really close to them to activate the NP, but at this point, it would be use it as a normal dagger.

  7. #4567
    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zh1212 View Post
    (Looking through the profile makes me think of a Cain Lily idea, where it's before he committed the First Murder, was just simply an aloof, hard-working "Big-Bro" who is absurdly good at taking care of crops. Probably lancer due to using a hoe to farm...)
    That's actually a pretty interesting idea. Cain Lily would be essentially somebody too innocent to realize that "people die when they are killed".

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by Hakuro View Post
    For the whole First Assassin stuff, I think his NP affecting only Good people kinda limited. Also to requering the opponent to trust him, that seems to make it much more limited. Like not many Servants would trust an enemy normally (maybe the ~knight~ ones would?), but even these would not trust an Assassin servant, even if by prejudice (honestly, if they are in this class they tried to kill someone and are not noticed by people so yeah). I don't see the scenario of the requisites happening with a Servant, and if does happens, not with more than one.

    But if he goes by the logic of "killing masters" that was the initial thought of the class, I see less chances of any Master trusting him, unless he uses Presence Concealment to pretend to be someone and get really close to them to activate the NP, but at this point, it would be use it as a normal dagger.
    Yeah, it was supposed to be super limited. I envisioned Cain as somebody with a lot of conceptual hax but severe restrictions on its application. Also, his Suppression Skill would probably help a little in getting people to trust him, though even if they couldn't sense anything they'd still have reasons to be naturally suspicious. (Since he is an Assassin and all)

  8. #4568
    リビングデッド Living Dead Hakuro's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RoydGolden View Post
    That's actually a pretty interesting idea. Cain Lily would be essentially somebody too innocent to realize that "people die when they are killed".

    - - - Updated - - -



    Yeah, it was supposed to be super limited. I envisioned Cain as somebody with a lot of conceptual hax but severe restrictions on its application. Also, his Suppression Skill would probably help a little in getting people to trust him, though even if they couldn't sense anything they'd still have reasons to be naturally suspicious. (Since he is an Assassin and all)
    Well if it is the author intention I don't have much more to say about him, the rest seems good.

  9. #4569
    Not Your Protagonist Bird of Hermes's Avatar
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    Getting back into the groove with my own take on a guy whose shown up here a few times.

    "The Seneschal is here! I've fought against the greatest heroes and villains of my time, what makes you think you have what it takes?!
    Who's next!"




    Final Ascension


    "I ask of you, are you my Master?

    Not very convincing, am I?

    I never play dress up any more, but there's nothing wrong with playing pretend. Reminds' me of the games I'd play with Wart when we were kids..."


    Source: (X)

    Servant: Rider
    Other Classes: Saber, Berserker
    True Name: Sir Kay "The Tall"
    Alignment: Chaotic Good
    Place of Origin: Britain (Arthurian Mythos)

    Parameters:

    STR: A
    END: B+
    AGI: D
    MGI: C
    LCK: C
    NP: B

    Height/Weight: 196cm/84kg
    Likes: Bragging, His younger sibling
    Dislikes: Courtly Graces, Being made a fool of
    Talent: Finance Administration, Paperwork
    Natural Enemy: Merlin, Cath Palug
    Attribute: Earth
    Traits: Human
    Armament: Armour, Sword

    Class Skills:

    Magic Resistance: B-
    Grants protection against magical effects. Differing from the Resistance effect that merely rejects Magical Energy, this ability cancels the spells altogether. Normally he would be able to cancel spells with a chant below three verses. Even if targeted by High-Thaumaturgy and Greater Rituals, it is difficult for him to be affected. However due to his poor relationship with Merlin and constantly being targeted by him, it has received a '-' modifier. Therefore when targeted by "Tricksters", his rank will decrease substantially to the degree where it may as well not exist.

    Riding: A
    The ability to ride mounts. All vehicles and all creatures but those of Phantasmal Beast and Divine Beast-rank can be used as mounts. He has just a high enough rank to qualify as a Rider due to only having real legend regarding his steed, but he can ride modern mounts such as bikes, cars and even jets to great proficiency.

    Personal Skills

    Golden Rule: C+
    A Skill that refers to the measurement of one's fortune to acquire wealth. At this rank, Servant is capable of amassing a great amount of wealth, as Camelot's 'Prince of Plunder' he was able to amass a fortune to last a lifetime under his administration. In addition, he is excellent in managing finances and can make for most out of any value of wealth.

    Monstrous Strength: B+
    A Skill that permits the augmentation of its holders Strength parameter by one rank for a time limit determined by the ranking of this Skill. Rider was said to be able to grow to a giant size and emanate a supernatural heat from his body in life. Therefore when activated as a servant, he will swell and grow in size and his body will set ablaze at no harm to him. Under the influence of the skill, Rider could be mistaken for the likes of a Fire Giant.

    Sharp Tongue: A+
    The art of mocking an opponent. The owner of this skill knows how to insult a targeted individual and provoke them into a desired outcome. At this rank, Rider will instinctively know the words to anger his opponent in order to make them target him and attack him recklessly. Although this may seem like a useless skill, when used correctly, it can goad opponents into an opening and is excellent in group battles. Rider was known for his disrespectful manner towards most individuals he met, however he was an excellent debater due to his argumentative attitude and is a master of trash-talk. In addition he can give insulting nicknames to everyone he meets.

    Noble Phantasms:

    Gwinam Goddwf Hir
    Northern Oak Mare


    Type: Anti-Team
    Rank: B
    Range: 1~50
    Max Targets: 30 People

    The mount of Sir Kay and the reason for his ability to be summoned in the Rider class. It is one of the "Three Sprightly Steeds of the Isle of Britain". It is a large and powerful brown stallion of high power that shares it's riders foul attitude thus only allowing Kay to ride it safely. By releasing the true name, the beast performs an attack. It is a ferocious assault stampeding and crushing all before it. When Rider is under the influence of his Monstrous Strength skill, Gwinam Goddwf Hir shares the same effect, increasing damage and range but reducing mobility. Although not inherently trained for combat like Bucephalus, it shares a mighty bond with Rider and deep trust with him.

    llarnwrach
    Holy Witchslayer


    Type: Anti-Unit
    Rank: B+
    Range: 1
    Max Targets: 1

    The sword of Sir Kay, supposedly originally owned by the Giant Gwrnach that Kay slew. It is a shining bronze tipped blade that leaves unrecoverable wounds that cannot be healed naturally or by magecraft. Due to the sword's reducing the value of the targets maximum HP, any form of recovery will only heal up to the point where the wounds were inflicted. The curse of the sword is effectively permanent, only the death of Rider or the destruction of the Noble Phantasm will dispel the curse. In another legend, Rider was said to have slain nine witches at once with the weapon, granting it powerful 'Anti-Magic' capabilities. Therefore the greater ones mana capacity, the more damage the sword deals, making it an 'Anti-Caster' weapon which compensates for his variable Magic Resistance.

    The blade was never actually named in life as according to Rider "People who name their weapons are pretentious snobs. No wonder Lancelot and Gawain did it." Though it seems that he has hopped on the bandwagon over a thousand years later.

    Lore

    Sir Kay was one of the first Knights of the Round Table. He was the son of Sir Ector and foster brother of Arturia, who later became known as King Arthur.

    Treating her as a little brother, their sibling relationship remained strong regardless of blood. He was sworn to secrecy by Merlin, meaning he was jinxed to be literally incapable of letting slip the truth about his "brothers" gender. Originally Arturia acted as Kay's attendant, carrying their weapons and provisions on outings, and she trained with Kay. Kay could never hope to match Arturia in a fair fight, but due to Kay's arguments, she always felt like she had lost against him.

    One day when Arturia was sick, Kay promised he'd do anything for her in exchange for her getting well quicker and was very insistent on it. After hearing she wanted to "dream of a lion running across plains," he left to carve a wooden lion. What he had the misfortune of creating looked like a hybrid of cat and dog.

    He was not there to witness her pulling the sword from the stone, however he attended her on her earliest adventures throughout the land as Arturia learned what it meant to be a knight and a king where he acted as her 'bouncer'. After fighting eleven impossible battles and wining along her side, Kay was one of the most senior knights of Camelot along and the most original Round Table consisted of only himself, Arturia, and Merlin.

    When Arturia lost Caliburn to the machinations of Morgan le Fay, he made her a wood carving of a bird catching a salmon in an attempt to cheer her up. After the final battle against Vortigern, she claimed her kingdom and they spent ten years in peace.

    However as more and more Knights joined the Round Table, Kay quickly became overshadowed by the sun powered Gawain, the perfect Lancelot, culminating being unhorsed by the young Percival who had never wielded a weapon before. Although certainly not a bad combatant by any stretch of the imagination, he was well aware of his skill level and how nearly everyone surpassed him. As a result, despite being friends with the Knights, he holds a silent level of resentment to them (save Bedivere) as a result.

    At the end of the reign of "King Arthur", Kay suspected Mordred's rebellion while Arturia was on an expedition in Rome, however he did not fight. He left with all his wealth to find new pastures. Looking back, all he can think is “Bollocks. What was it that she wanted to do so much to have to go that far?”


    Personality

    A very argumentative man, possessing an "elegant way of speaking" according to Arturia. There were even rumours of him having shocked fire dragons back to where they came with words alone, he naturally claims these to be true.

    During his sparing matched with his foster sibling, he would always change the conditions and rule of the fight to make him win be default but this juvenile behaviour stopped when she became king, he often gave her strict and frank advice, and she believed such wit was required to rule a country. He is very skilled in management, so much that not a single shilling was wasted during any of their campaigns when he was in charge of the funds. He also thinks of himself as a ladies' man and often flirts around women. He is certainly not Lancelot and tends to strike out more than he'll admit.

    A hot headed and fiery tempered troublemaker, he clashed with other members of the Round often as a result of his personality. He held a one sided rivalry with Gawain with the result in the two being "friends" that laughed at each others misfortune. He also resents Lancelot, finding how "Perfect" he is utterly infuriating and is still resentful that Lancelot completely upstaged him in rescuing him and Guinevere from Melegrant & that Lancelot still has the audacity to call himself "Perfect" even though he had an affair with Guinevere. This is all according to Kay however.

    Despite his love for Arturia, he, like many others, holds some resentments towards her for sacrificing herself. Unable to understand that for which she struggles, he finds her dedication to something she never once personally experienced to be sickening in a manner enough to make him shudder. This culminates in his wish, although he cannot fully hope to understand Arturia and probably never will, he just wishes for her to find true happiness.

    Bond Lines:

    Lvl. 1: I don't understand all this selfless action, everyone has a reason to do something.
    Lvl. 2: I never understood the king. They always acted selflessly like they were a soulless machine. I loved them but, in the end I couldn't comprehend their action, so I left.
    Lvl. 3: I abandoned my king when I was most needed. And the king died at Camlainn. I failed as a knight and a brother.
    Lvl. 4: You still trust me after all this? Very well, I suppose I shall find peace as your sword.
    Lvl. 5: I wasn't the best knight, nor the best brother. I'll always regret those things. But being yours? That I can do.

    Other Relationships:

    Nero: Rider is curious as to why she looks exactly like his king. He may try and act like a big brother to her, but given how different Arturia and Nero act, Rider may be a bit jarred. They are both giftedly bad artists, so they may bond over that. Also the fact that there are so many people that look like Arturia really freaks him out. Out of all of them, he gets along with Nero best and finds her fun to be around.

    Caster!Gilles, Medea, Gilgamesh: Perverts who stalk his sister. They could use a beating or several.

    Diarmuid: "Good lord, shut up and get over yourself! If your curse is that bad then wear a freakin helmet!"



    Key Words/Craft Essences


    Behind the Throne

    "The king is correct.
    The king rules justly and fairly, a right on paragon of virtue. He does everything perfectly every time. He is lawful, he is good. He can truly do no wrong.
    But my king act without hesitation with no feeling, like a robot or whatever you call those things. He acts with no selflessness, no spirit, as if… he hates himself. But I could never understand. I am not the king and never will be"

    "My sister is great.
    She has a sweet beauty that few parallel, she is frail and dainty and strong. She is so vibrant and full of life. She loves to dance, to play and finds lions far more adorable than they actually are."

    "It's hard to believe they were once the same person to be honest. I serve my king, but I will always love my sister. I think she died the day she put on the crown.
    She doesn't smile anymore."

    Caliburn
    The fabled 'Sword of Appointment'. A splendid ceremonial blade, sealed in a stone to anoint the next King. Only the true heir could pull the sword from the stone and claim the throne. Rider was one of many who tried and failed.

    The Round Table
    King Arthur's famed table in the Arthurian legend, around which he and his Knights congregate. As its name suggests, it has no head, implying that everyone who sits there has equal status. There were thirteen Knights of the Round Table, with Rider being among the first.

    Arthurian Cycle
    The name of the tales around the King of Knights. In modern days, these legends are regarded as the definitive symbol of chivalry due to tales such as the Matter of France, Wagner's Ring Cycle and the poem of El Cid losing cultural impact over time. There are many elements of the myths; holy swords, castles, fair maidens, dragons and knights of good and evil.
    Last edited by Bird of Hermes; March 16th, 2017 at 06:14 PM. Reason: New FC's

  10. #4570
    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Kay: Interesting to see your take on this guy here, having written up a sheet for him myself. You depicted him as a lot more hot-blooded (which is probably more accurate to the legends) and the personality as a whole is well written and fleshed out. His NPs are mostly rather generic (second one is basically a combo of Diarmuid's pair) but that's pretty understandable given the lack of obviously creative NP-worthy stuff in his legend. (For my own Kay sheet, I had to resort to completely fictionalizing an NP for him based off his sharp tongue)

    The Craft Essence is also nicely bittersweet. Funny how we both posted up characters in succession with Sis-Con issues (though mine is obviously far more pronounced).

    Speaking of such, any commentary from you on my revised Cain sheet above?

  11. #4571
    Dead Apostle Eater Gally's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bird of Hermes View Post
    Sir Kay
    Nah, dawg.

    This here is Cai.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Or some weird mash-up of the two.
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  12. #4572
    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gally View Post
    Nah, dawg.

    This here is Cai.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Or some weird mash-up of the two.
    Isn't it the same name though, just Latinized? That's sort of like saying Shirou Emiya, Emiya Shiro and 衛宮士郎 are three different characters.

  13. #4573
    Dead Apostle Eater Gally's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RoydGolden View Post
    Isn't it the same name though, just Latinized? That's sort of like saying Shirou Emiya, Emiya Shiro and 衛宮士郎 are three different characters.
    It's his Welsh name.

    And it's not the same thing 'cause you can't call Cai and Kay the same character.
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  14. #4574
    Not Your Protagonist Bird of Hermes's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RoydGolden View Post
    Isn't it the same name though, just Latinized? That's sort of like saying Shirou Emiya, Emiya Shiro and 衛宮士郎 are three different characters.
    It's one of the many different spellings, Cai is one of the original Welsh depictions of it.

    He's also been called Caius (Latin), Kei (other welsh) and Keu (French)

    Quote Originally Posted by RoydGolden View Post
    Kay: Interesting to see your take on this guy here, having written up a sheet for him myself. You depicted him as a lot more hot-blooded (which is probably more accurate to the legends) and the personality as a whole is well written and fleshed out. His NPs are mostly rather generic (second one is basically a combo of Diarmuid's pair) but that's pretty understandable given the lack of obviously creative NP-worthy stuff in his legend. (For my own Kay sheet, I had to resort to completely fictionalizing an NP for him based off his sharp tongue)

    The Craft Essence is also nicely bittersweet. Funny how we both posted up characters in succession with Sis-Con issues (though mine is obviously far more pronounced).

    Speaking of such, any commentary from you on my revised Cain sheet above?
    Yours was almost a unique view of the character as in practically every rendition of him he's been rather brash and loud and varied from a hot blooded snarker to an incompetent buffoon, often falling on a scale between the two. Meanwhile your Kay was almost totally different.

    It's a shame because in the older texts, he was one of the premier knights alongside Bedivere but then along came Percival, Gawain, Lancelot and Galahad being introduced centuries later and Kay became the Krillin of the round table. My version of Kay is also more accurate as despite the NP's being a bit more bland admittedly, they're closer the original texts when he was still relevant.

    Also regarding Cain, it's definitely better than the old version and fits the trend you started with Abel. All I can say is that the Eye of the Mind skill isn't necessary.
    Last edited by Bird of Hermes; February 17th, 2017 at 06:05 PM.

  15. #4575
    Pondering for new ideas. Zh1212's Avatar
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    (Honestly, even after a week of looking this over, I’m still somewhat unhappy with the results. However, I can’t exactly pinpoint that problem; it’s almost like an itch telling me it wasn’t good enough. In case any of you guys find any sort of problem or apparent overpowered-ness, feel free to reply.)

    Appearance: http://gambargin.deviantart.com/art/...eens-464700526

    Servant Class: Caster

    True Name: Septimia Zenobia, or Bat-Zabbai

    Alignment: True Neutral

    Attribute: Man

    Alternate Classes: Rider, Lancer, Archer

    Catalyst: An Antoninianus (A Roman 2-Denarii coin) with Zenobia’s face on it

    Likes: Hunting, Listening to the wise, Vaballathus

    Dislikes: Political Corruption, "Rot", Aurelian

    Talents: Leadership, Politics

    Natural Enemy: Anyone from the "Festering Wound" that is Rome

    Parameters:

    Strength - B+
    Endurance - C
    Agility - C+
    Mana - B
    Luck - C-
    N.
    Phantasm - B

    Background:

    Spoiler:

    A legendary queen of the Palmyrene Empire, Septimia Zenobia exceeded expectations by dealing serious blows to the Roman Empire in taking over Egypt and the lands surrounding it. While she and her empire was defeated by Emperor Aurelian in around not long after, Zenobia’s stable and prosperous rule resulted in an multicultural empire that is still known to this day.

    Born in around 240 AD and was raised as a typical noble girl, Zenobia was given a above-average education which involved the mastery of the Egyptian, Greek, Latin, and Amariac languages. Not satisfied with merely academics, Zenobia pushed past the boundaries and learned more active skills such as hunting and sparring. In her later years, Zenobia was married to Odaenathus, the king of Palmyra, to serve as Consort. While the luxuries of being a Consort were welcomed, Zenobia preferred to be active and always accompanied Odaenathus to his military campaigns. At the campaigns, her fighting skills and tactics earned the respect of the soldiers; as a result, this would give her a political leverage she would require later in life.

    After the assassination of Odaenathus, the title to the throne was initially granted to Vaballathus, but was transferred to Zenobia since the former was still young. While the process to establish her role as Queen-Regent was long and arduous, Zenobia managed to create a stable kingdom where the people rejected by the Romans can gather an live in peace. Within those years of development, the queen had surrounded herself with the land’s most capable minds, learning various new things – including powerful magic that would help her troops in battle.

    Zenobia’s greatest accomplishment was her conquest of Egypt, where she took advantage of Rome’s current political infighting and sent 70,000 soldiers to capture the land. With additional local support from Egypt, the queen’s troops managed to capture Alexandria. Although, it took several years for Zenobia’s troops to successfully dominate the region in 271 AD.

    While Zenobia was busy expanding her empire, the Romans were too busy fighting to become Emperor. At 270, the new emperor Aurelian noticed that Palmyra was becoming a threat. Also, they seemed to be mocking the Roman Empire by spreading currency with Zenobia’s face on it. Not being a person to let this threat and insult stand, the new Roman Emperor formed an army and unleashed a unstoppable campaign against the Palmyrian Empire.

    Although Zenobia’s forces put up heavy resistance, Aurelian’s army barely managed to push the warrior-queen’s forces back multiple times, all the way back to the Palmyrian capital. If not for the army’s overconfidence during the Battle of Emesa, Zenobia’s forces would’ve repelled the Roman army earlier on.

    Realizing that she’s in a dire need of assistance, Zenobia and her son attempted to secretly ride to Persia to ask for assistance, but were captured by Roman forces before she could cross the Euphrates.

    Captured, Zenobia and Vaballathus were taken back to Rome in chains to be held in trial. Fortunately, both were acquitted, but were forced to live within the confines of Rome for the rest of their lives; something akin to House Arrest. As a result, her life faded to obscurity, her death unknown to the world.


    Personal Traits:

    Spoiler:

    True to the stories surrounding her, Zenobia was every bit of the “Wise Warrior-Queen” she was known to be; headstrong, open to new ideas and being pragmatic when needed.

    As her duty of Queen-Regent, she is rarely far away from her group of scholars/advisors. The group of intellectuals often informs her of an pressing issue, and given her various perspectives to make a decision. Usually, these issues were either one way or another, and are often have dire consequences. To everyone’s shock, Zenobia smoothly created Win-Win situations for both sides. Because of her ingenuity, her empire managed to house conflicting religions and cultures without any of them trying to overrun the another.

    Outside of her royal responsibilities, however, Zenobia can be seen as more free-spirited than her queenly mask in the palace. When she is actually has time to spare, she would enjoy the wind against her face when she rides her horse across the land, revel in the thrill of battle, both mock and real ones, and will always appreciate several mugs of strong Alcohol after extensive sparring.

    Because she was summoned as the Caster Class, this version of Zenobia focuses on the "Wise" aspect of her character. While she can certainly go into the offensive, Caster!Zenobia prefers to stay back and analyze the situation; for she believes in studying her enemies in order to take the most optimal course of action. She is more reserved than her other counterparts, and will try to work out an agreement for any conflicts. However, because of her belief that Win-Win situations are possible, Caster!Zenobia rarely does accept one-sided agreements.

    Due to the internal conflict of the Roman Empire in her time, Zenobia sees the nation as a festering wound, and its rot will eventually destroy it empire from within. Because of this, she believes that she must act in the world’s stead and “cleanse the wound to start anew.” And from ridding Rome of its “corruption,” Zenobia will assimilate it with Palmyra, and plans to create an empire that will rival even Iskandar’s.

    One of Zenobia's biggest driving force during her rule was ambition alone. Since childhood, while other strived for easy goals, Zenobia pushed past expectations to better herself. Eventually, as Queen-Regent, she aims to go beyond to transform Palmyra and her people into an indomitable force of nature that will last into history. However, the same ambition led to Zenobia proclaiming her son as Emperor, which led to Aurelian’s campaign, resulting in Palmyra's fall. When left unchecked, her desire to advance may be her own undoing.

    If Zenobia were to have a wish granted by the Holy Grail, it would be for her to hold back on proclaiming Vaballathus as Emperor, for she realized it was a foolish and careless decision to mock the Roman Empire in that manner. Instead, she’ll have to plan an alternate plan by amassing enough allies to overtake Rome.

    (Despite her superior potential as Caster, Zenobia still wishes that she was summoned as Rider. She merely misses the freedom of riding a horse.)

    (Although she views her peoples' wellbeing as a number one priority, Zenobia still cared about her son Vaballathus more than anything else.)


    ​Reactions to Other Servants: (Note: this is with Zenobia's bias)

    Spoiler:

    Iskandar: Zenobia mostly agrees with his philosophy as a ruler. However, she has to admit that a ruler would still have to be slightly above human matters in order to act properly. Despite that, both would be avid sparring and drinking buddies. Although Iskandar's fairly surprised that an famous warrior-queen is a Caster Servant of all classes.

    Arturia: "The little 'king' may have a point about rulers being above their subjects, but her ideals are childish; at that point, you disregard all attributes of being human. A ruler still needs to be human to understand their subjects' wants and needs, a ruler who doesn't is merely an symbol — akin to an empty shell; unfit to even rule."

    Gilgamesh: Endless riches and an impressive weapons aside, Zenobia sees the King of Heroes unfit to be ruler, and wonders how did he even managed to keep Uruk together with an ego as large as his. However, she knows to keep silent, since incurring the Archer's wrath is rather unnecessary.

    Any Roman Servants (except Romulus): View them with a mix of pity and contempt; mainly due to the nation's pitiful condition from numerous infighting when she was alive. And the seemingly self-important attitude that they all possess, unaware of everyone else besides them. Because of that, she sees them as "rot" that must be cleansed from the land. (Most of the pity was for Romulus, though.)


    Skills:

    Spoiler:

    Class Skills:

    Territory Creation - A- – A Caster-class Skill. It is the Skill to build a special terrain that is advantageous to oneself as a magus, such as for the purpose of collecting mana.
    Zenobia is able to recreate her palace of the old Palmyrian Empire, which is greater than a ‘Workshop.’ However, accounts of the palace were lost to history, thus is less effective than it originally was.

    Item Construction - n/a - A Caster-class Skill. It is the Skill to manufacture magical items, from implements of war to items for daily use. Also, this Skill requires time to gather components and manufacture items.
    Unfortunately, Zenobia was only taught spells that would help her fight and support her troops in battle, thus is unable to produce any magical item of sorts.

    Personal Skills:

    Wise Queen’s Authority - B - An advanced form of Charisma, where any Servants or human beings that are aligned with Zenobia will receive a bonus in battle, but as a result will unflinchingly follow the user’s orders. However, those with origins relating to Divinity or Royalty or a rank B or more in Magic Resistance are able to resist the effects of this Skill.
    Zenobia had studied from the land’s best and brightest minds during her reign, which allowed her to make optimal decisions for Palmyra.

    Military Tactics - B - Tactical knowledge used not for one-on-one combat situations, but for battles where many are mobilized. Bonus modifiers are provided during use of one's own Anti-Army Noble Phantasm or when dealing against an enemy Anti-Army Noble Phantasm.
    With the combined knowledge from military campaigns and teachings of various scholars and officers, Zenobia is able to devise the best course of plan for any situation.

    Mana Burst (Weapons) - C - A Skill that is an extremely rare external-type of Mana Burst, where it allows the user to shape magic energy into the form of various spectral weapons. A catalyst is needed to focus the magic energy, though.
    At rank C, this Skill allows Zenobia to change her staff into various weapons, allowing her to engage in close combat. From spectral blades to bows, the warrior-queen can form any weapon onto her staff.


    Noble Phantasm:

    Spoiler:

    Beacon of Palmyra - Stand Up Against the Ever-Stacking Odds - B - Anti-Formation -

    The primary Noble Phantasm of Zenobia, which takes form as her armament; a stone staff from which she forms her mana weapons. Not only does this serve as a magic catalyst, it also represented the queen’s valiant last stand that she hoped would have occurred but was captured before it was fulfilled. But with this NP, Zenobia is able have the resistance she was denied in life.

    The NP activates when she slams her staff down on the ground once, where she would gather the attention of her other allies. Once Zenobia caught their attention, she will give out a rousing speech. The speech may vary depending on the situation, but her ending will always be the same:

    Even if our identities are lost to time, our actions will live on the annals of history!”

    With this, Zenobia slams the staff down one more time, sending a magical shockwave across her allies. The allies who were in contact to the shockwave receives a boost to their Parameters, increasing them by two ranks each except Noble Phantasm ranking (can’t go past A rank, though.) The NP will grant an additional bonus against enemies that are much more experienced or stronger than them. Additionally, the NP somehow increases the allies’ morale, which can even make the most pessimistic person to have a positive outlook.

    However, for all of this to work, the first slam of the staff has to get the allies’ attention, or else the NP won’t be in its full power. The speech also has to be spoken without a single interruption, or else the NP will “lose focus” and will have to start the speech again.

    Finally, for a NP appropriate for a last stand, it can only be activated when Zenobia and her allies are either at an severe disadvantage or most of her allies are driven to a corner. Once either Zenobia and co. had won the battle or she dies during its effects, the NP wears off.
    Last edited by Zh1212; February 18th, 2017 at 06:28 PM. Reason: Changed according to criticism

  16. #4576
    Tranquilo, Japones, Tranquilo JetKinen's Avatar
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    Fun sheet.
    I admit i have no idea who she is so i can only judge what is written here.

    Don't really have anything much to say about tbh. Story and Personality are fine from what i've read, but the reason for the Noble Phantasm seems kinda flimsy. I'm supposing she is pretty obscure, and i'm sure this kind of justification happens all the time but a Last Stand NP about a Last Stand that didn't happen is pretty out there.
    "Zenobia is defiant to the end" until she isn't and spends her last years in house arrest.

    Mind you, i have no problem with the Noble Phantasm, i'm pretty sure i've been guilty of doing the same thing in sheets past, i'm just voicing my thoughts out loud.

    I also can't really give you suggestions because i really don't know anything about her

    - - - Updated - - -

    I also feel like Wise's Queen Authority maybe doesn't fit with her? Maybe it would make more sense if i knew about her
    Was the overconfidence at the Battle of Emesa her fault? She commanded them, so they matched her overconfidence or was that something out of her control?

    Fate Grand/Order ID: 102947414/GreenBob
    JetKinen's tries very poorly to translate a brazilian book

  17. #4577
    Pondering for new ideas. Zh1212's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JetKinen View Post
    Fun sheet.
    I admit i have no idea who she is so i can only judge what is written here.

    Don't really have anything much to say about tbh. Story and Personality are fine from what i've read, but the reason for the Noble Phantasm seems kinda flimsy. I'm supposing she is pretty obscure, and i'm sure this kind of justification happens all the time but a Last Stand NP about a Last Stand that didn't happen is pretty out there.
    "Zenobia is defiant to the end" until she isn't and spends her last years in house arrest.

    Mind you, i have no problem with the Noble Phantasm, i'm pretty sure i've been guilty of doing the same thing in sheets past, i'm just voicing my thoughts out loud.

    I also can't really give you suggestions because i really don't know anything about her

    - - - Updated - - -

    I also feel like Wise's Queen Authority maybe doesn't fit with her? Maybe it would make more sense if i knew about her
    Was the overconfidence at the Battle of Emesa her fault? She commanded them, so they matched her overconfidence or was that something out of her control?
    Ah, the contradiction of the NP was pretty obvious, thanks for pointing it out!

    Regarding the battle, it was merely the army getting overconfident; while she has control over their formation, she can't exactly control their emotions.

  18. #4578
    Tranquilo, Japones, Tranquilo JetKinen's Avatar
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    Ah, i see.
    It was a fun sheet anyway, besides those points i, someone who had no idea who she is, didn't have much problem with it.
    For anything more, you gotta wait for someone who knows more about her to read your sheet

    Anyway, after watching a bunch of Kung Fu movies, heres a new sheet

    Supercop
    Shielder
    faceclaim
    Info
    True Name: Ip Kai-Man
    Also known as: Yip Man,Yip Kai-man,Ye-Wen, The Grandmaster of Wingchun, Supercop
    Gender: Male
    Alignment: Lawful Good
    Likes: His Wife, His Mistress, Women, Children, Opium, Police Work, Martial Arts.
    Dislikes: Lawbreakers, Teaching, Throat Cancer.
    Parameters and Skills
    STR: C
    END: C
    AGI: A+
    MGI: C
    LCK: B

    Class Skills

    Magic Resistence
    D - One of the class skills of the Shielder Class. It grants protection against magical effects. Cancels Single-Action spells. Magic Resistance of the same degree of an amulet that rejects magical energy. Shielder never fought against magical users so this skill is only this high because of the Shielder container. Truly a fake Shielder

    Riding
    E - This is the Class Skill of Rider, Saber and Shielder class Servants, denoting the ability to ride mounts and vehicles. Once again, Shielder only has this skill thanks to his container. He can ride most animals and vehicles with some proficiency.

    Personal Skills

    Chinese Martial Art (Wing Chun)
    A+++ - This is a Chinese rationality. A value that measures one's mastery of the martial arts that made becoming one with the universe as its objective. Its difficulty to learn is of the highest level and, unlike other Skills, it is at A Rank that one is at a level where he is said to have finally "learned it". Shielder is a master amongst masters when it comes to Wing Chun. He is one of the biggest contributors to the expansion of the martial arts and his influence is vast enough that most Wing Chun schools are direct descendeants of his direct teachings. Shielder is an expert of the Barehanded, Long Pole and Butterfly Knives techniques.

    Chi Sao
    A - Chi Sao, or Sticky Hands, is the name given to the principle and drill of Wing Chun, where one trains his trapping skills and sensitivity. By mastering this concept, when in close-range, the martial artist can protect his and break into his opponent's centerline. When fighting in close-range the Servant is able to understand any sort of technique thrown at him and answer accordingly. Shielder skills with this principle is so big that it works effectivly as the Instinct and Eye of the Mind skills, but one that needs no eyesight for it to work, and one that is superspecialized in Close-Quarters combat. Chi Sau doesn't work against those who fight from outside of the Martial Artist attack range.

    Enforcers of the Law
    C - The Skill given to those that have worked in Law Enforcement during their lives. This Skill, is crystalized, in the Badge or insignia, that best represents his old working place. Servants with this skill are specialists in affairs envolving Law Enforcement: Detainment, Crowd Control, Regulating Traffic, Detective Work and so on. While flashing his Badge the Servant also gains bonuses while acting against lawbreakers. However if the Servant commits too many "police misconducts" he might lose the badge and all the bonuses that come with him. While Shielder was influent in his precinct, perharps for a lack of motivation, his highest rank in the order was that of a Cop.

    Sao gerk seung siu, mo jit jiu
    - See Noble Phantasm section
    Biography & Lore
    Ip Kai-Man, born in 1893 in the City of Foshan in Southneastern part of China, is the main exponent of the Wing Chun Kung Fu Style. One of the most revered martial artists in China, Ip Man live through the tail end of the golden age of traditional chinese martial arts, living through Republican China, the Japanese Ocupation and the Communist takeover before settling in Hong Kong where he opened his school. Ip Man influence in the Martial world is far expanding, teaching to over a thousand different people.

    Ip Man, born from a rich family, started soon his Wing Chun training at the age of 7. He will have many different teachers during his life, notably Chan Wah-shun, Wu Chung-sok and finally Leung Bik. Under those three, Ip Man learn all the bases that would form his own personal Wing Chun. At the age of 27, Ip-Man became a policeman, and taught several of his coworkers, but didn't open a kung fu school.
    Truth be told, while at the time, there were many Kung Fu Schools, there were also many that practice Martial Arts by their lonesome, becoming something close to hermits. While Ip-Man wasn't nowhere as close as them, he was an introverted and loner at heart, who was happier practicing by himself or with a very close group of martial arts junkies. Nevertheless, when he joined the force, he noticed that many of the policemen were not trained to handle violent situations, so he took upon himself and trained many of his colleges in the art of Wing Chun, gaining him immense respect by his peers, even though he never rose to higher levels in his job, thanks to his lack of ambition.

    While working on the force, Ip Man threw his body and soul into almost two things: His Kung Fu and His Job. A serious policeman but meek policeman, Ip Man participated in many cases involving fights between Kung Fu Schools, Gangs of Bandits and Communist revoutionaries. During this period, his life as a policeman led him to meet people living under dire conditions that were abused by more unsavory people. This led him to teach those people Wing Chun for their self-defense, as he was unable to protect them all their life. While he, absolutely, saw that as a hassle, he couldn't just let them to suffer.

    During this time he met his wife, a frail but strong willed woman named Cheung Wing-sing. An arranged marriage that soon become a loving one, Cheung melted, violently, her way into his Kung Fu fanatic heart. During those years, Ip Man revealed himself to be a huge doormat against women, a personality trait that will follow him to his grave. Ip Man, the Kung Fu Machine, became weak on his knees when near his wife. He did everything for her, treated her lovingly. He considered this to be the peak of his life, so he is summoned as Ip Man, the Policeman. Sadly, he was also weak on the knees against other women. Ip Man was not a perfect men: known adulterer and opium addict, Ip Man vices ended up catching him in his later days after he died of throat cancer.

    With the communist takeover, Ip Man was forced to travel to Hong Kong where, jobless, he opened a Wing Chun school. There he taught many students, the more known of them being a certain famous movie star. Much like another famous Kung Fu Master, it's possible to summon an Older Ip Man. This phase of his life would be it. He would have embraced his teaching job, and becoming more wise but also becoming more cranky. On the topic of movies, the recent surge of movies portraying him as the new Wong Fei-Hung gives him very mixed feelings
    Personality
    Shielder tries to be a good example of a policeman through and through. A serious, respectable if a bit hotheaded man on duty, Shielder tries his best to uphold the law and to protect the oppressed. The lenghts he goes to do his best job is something worthy of admiration.

    Outside of his job, is more of a mess personality-wise. Introvert, loner, weak against women, a true kung fu otaku, Shielder is at his happiest either when he is serving a woman or by himself practicing his art. His singleminded obsession with Martial Arts, can make him sound pretty distant when talking about anything else to him.

    Shielder is very embarassed about his recent portrayals on the Big Screens, claiming that they're all much cooler than he actually was during life, especially Donnie-Yen's interpretation. He doesn't tell anyone this, but he also feels a hint of self-respect at the movies and their actors.

    He doesn't has any particular. Odds are he would ask to the call of a Master out of a sense of duty. If he ends up winning the war, he would for a cure to his wife's medicine, or his own throat cancer

    Shielder has immense respect for those Servants experts in martial arts, be it barehanded or armed. If he has the opportunity he will always ask a billion questions about their style, training and technique. A man of hierarchy, Ip Man is also quite humble with Servants that represent higher power than him always calling them by their title, trying not to offend them. However, Ip Man is not scared to act against those that either use their martial arts skill or their higher position to break the law.
    Noble Phantasms
    Hands and feet defend accordingly, there are no secret unstoppable maneuvers
    Sao gerk seung siu, mo jit jiu

    One of the maxim of the Wing Chun and the ideal Ip Man strove towards during his entire martial arts life. "Sao gerk seung siu, mo jit jiu", translated as "Hands and feet defend accordingly, there are no secret unstoppable maneuvers" is one of the main principles of the Ip Man Style of Wing Chun, that hold itself as a non-nonsense practical system that rewards hardwork over secret techniques. The saying has contains two obvious meanings. The first one is the one given to novices of the system to quickly lower expectations:No with Wing Chun you will not learn secret techiniques like breaking the reality with swords or becoming invisible by fusing with nature. Differing from most Traditional Kung Fu styles, Wing Chun only has 6 Forms(Three for Barehanded fighting, 1 for Wooden Dummies, and 2 for weapons:Long Pole and the Butterfly Knives) which compared to lets say Bajiquan that has 20 forms just for barehanded fighting, is a pretty low number. But while these Wing Chun has less forms, the system is a expensive and practical one that rewards mastering the basics. By reducing the forms into just 6 forms, the student is quickly able to grasp the basic elements which allows to quickly begin sparring. This simplicity made Ip Man's teachings to be quickly grasped by the most varied group of people: from adults to kids and even old people, Wing Chun quickly became China's main form of Self Defense. But this surface simplicity hides a hidden depth. While Wing Chun lacks the number of forms, they're all emcompassing and all-evolving, while Chi Sau and constant sparring made Wing Chun one of the most versatile styles, capable of answering any technique from the enemy. This ties to the final and most arrogant of meaning of the maxim, symbolizing Wing Chun's perfect system of defense and counter-attack. By using their high sensitivity, knowledge, and understanding of the system the masters of this style are able to stop even the most powerful of techniques. Wing Chun laughs at trump cards, rewarding the understanding of basics.

    Thanks to Shielder absoute mastery of this principle, this skill, ironically, has become Ip Man's trump card transforming into something close to a Noble Phantasm like a certain nameles samurai Reality Breaking Sword and a fellow Kung Fu Master Instant Kill Punch. But while those are offensive skills, Ip Man's an almost exclusively defensive one, that is expecialized in hunting down and breaking down the enemies secret techniques. When locked in Combat, Ip Man is able to create, purely through martial skill, something close to a bounding field. Inside that Bounded Field, Shielder is able to manipulate causality: Inside of it, it doesn't matter what blow the opponent throw, there but one rule "Shielder will defend and stop the opponent's attack". While on the the basic level this merely translates as Shielder being able to match any strike, this can quickly reaches ridiculous levels when Shielder suddenly starts to break reality alongside a certain Samurai sword.

    While not an offensive skill this is an incredibly powerful one. It translates in Close Combat Domination. At the very worse, if the opponent is able to surpass Ip Man and he isn't able to finish him, the kung fu master is able to stall the close-quarters fight into virtually infinity. Ip Man essentially transforms his entire body into a shield that is able to lock any opponent as long as he tries to play by his rules.

    Of course there are weakness to this technique. Most obviously, the bounded field is the size of Ip Man's combat range, so attacks thrown at him from outside of that range, can bypass most of the effect. Secondly, no matter how powerful his technique is, Ip Man technique works against other techniques, so while he is able to stop the blow from a certain female king magic sword, he isn't able to stop this magic sword beam. Lastly, this skill works against enemies throwing blows on him. While Shielder can use this technique to Shield someone from an attack, it's not a perfect defense and it might result in either Shielder or said someone taking heavy damage.

    Anti-Unit Demonic Fist


    Truth to be told, i was thinking on making him for a long time, just couldn't think of a good Noble Phantasm. But i've read some Wing Chun books and managed to come up with one.
    I know lots of Ip Man achievements are cinematic creations but i couldn't just ignore him after having lived through this Ip Man boom.
    Anyway at some point this became a HK's Police Hero sheet, so of course i had to use Lei Wulong as faceclaim even though he is the Jackie Chan wannabe and not the Donnie Yen one. When will Donnie become an character archetype like Bruce, Jackie and in minor quantities Jet?

    at some point i'll make a Counter Guardian RYUUDOU(Reikan) sheet, i promise!
    Last edited by JetKinen; February 18th, 2017 at 02:20 AM.

    Fate Grand/Order ID: 102947414/GreenBob
    JetKinen's tries very poorly to translate a brazilian book

  19. #4579
    Pondering for new ideas. Zh1212's Avatar
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    Yes! Another Martial Arts Servant, and my favorite one at that, too!

    While you did beat me to the punch on making Ip Kaiman as a Servant, you really did him justice here.

    By the way, who would win: Li Shuwen or Ip Kaiman?
    Last edited by Zh1212; February 18th, 2017 at 02:22 AM.

  20. #4580
    Tranquilo, Japones, Tranquilo JetKinen's Avatar
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    I'm not really a fan of doing powerlevel arguments with my own sheets but

    Sphere Boundary is super strong so even if Ip Man is aware of him, he can really only force a draw out of him.

    If invisibility is turned off, then in theory, Ip Man should have the advantage on the basis that he can shut down any offensive Shuwen can throw.

    However Shuwen does use Bajiquan which is the strongest martial art in the Nasuverse so there is that.

    - - - Updated - - -

    I also don't really like to ask for feedback, but i'm already indulging in some hypocrasy, so anyway, i always struggle making Reality Breaking Martial Arts Skills, so if possible, i please ask for some feedback on that Ip Man one.

    I never know if i went too far while making those.

    Fate Grand/Order ID: 102947414/GreenBob
    JetKinen's tries very poorly to translate a brazilian book

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