What TYPE-MOON Characters Would Never Say REDUX

[The Geek]

Artemis: "Who is this dumb bear?" *punts Orion*

--------

Gilgamesh: "I am a proud feminist."

[hayate]

Dantes: I'll solve every conflict I encounter with money. Have at thee! (splurges thick wads of banknotes)

Azaka: My brother is such a pedo.

[RoydGolden]

Dantes: "The cycle of revenge only begets further violence. Make love, not war!"

Shiki (Ryougi): "I really wish I could kill someone right now. Too bad I'm too squeamish to do it."

[Winter]

Taiga: You know, I think I would be a better math teacher.

Shinji: Sakura, you're the best thing that ever happened to me.

[hayate]

Tokiomi: Forget reaching the Root, I'll just sell my books and my jewels. From there, I'll build my empire.

Emiya Noritaka: Training is useless. Here, kids, have some cotton candy.

[Winter]

This was a stupid idea but I'm posting any way lol

Small Shirou: Hey, dad, Taiga said you used to have a woman around before you found me. What happened to her?

Kiritsugu: *interrupted from wistfully looking at the moon* ...did Taiga say what this woman looked like?

Shirou: Yeah, she wore black a lot and had short hair.

Kiritsugu: Oh.

Shirou: *sits down next to Kiritsugu* So was she your girlfriend?

Kiritsugu: No, son.

Shirou: Then who was she?

Kiritsugu: Son, do you know what a mistress is?

Shirou: Yeah.

Kiritsugu: Well when daddy is lonely... -you do? How?

Shirou: Uncle Raiga.

Kiritsugu: Ah.

*awkward silence*

Shirou: So she was your mistress?

Kiritsugu: Yes Shirou, she was my mistress.

*Young Shirou turns away to look at the moon*

Shirou: Cool.

[hayate]

This is the most stupid one...

Kiritsugu (at Kotomine Kirei): Pewpewpewpewpewpewpewpewpewpewpewpewpewpewpew... (ad infinitum)

[Iceblade44]

For the new servants of Shinjuku.

Moriarty: Sherlock Holmes is inspiration and Idol.

Hessian Lobo: (Lobo) "rolls around to get a belly rub"

Hessian Lobo: (The Headless Horseman) "starts to yodel"

i don't know the others much to anything for them sadly'

[The Geek]

Scathach: *surrounded by the different versions of Cu* "Don't talk to me or my sons ever again."

[Draconic]

- Gilgamesh (to Shirou): I admire you.

- Saber: No, I can wait for dinner.

- Taiga: Let's sit down and think this through rationally. *proceeds to do exactly that*

- Shiki Tohno: Maybe I should take a vow of chastity?

- Gilgamesh: Please, I need some help with a matter of some importance.

Yeah... I'm just stating the obvious.

[hayate]

Saber: No, I can wait for dinner.

It's more like this, I think...

Saber: Gawain, your mashed potatoes are exquisite in taste.

[The Geek]

Medb: "Why do people like Scathach so much? What with her long, silky hair and her full, pouting lips. Come to think of it, why do I like Scathach so much?"

----

Saber: "Aren't you going to take issue with a woman protecting you?"

Shirou: "Nah, I'm pretty sure you got this."

[hayate]

Medb: Sex? That word sure sounds foreign for me. Come to think of it, I do know that word. And I abhor it!

Touko: I wuv you my cute little sister!!! (glomps at Aoko)

[Bird of Hermes]

Emiya: Who are you?

Emiya Alter: I'm you but I screwed up even worse.

[Draconic]

Azaka: Okay, fine, you're married, so I concede defeat. He's all yours, Ryougi.

[The Geek]

Artoria Lily to Arthur: "Onii-chan~"

[hayate]

Hercules (seeing Gilgamesh): Nope. No way I can kill that guy. Nice knowing you though, Illya.

Kiritsugu: Should have gotten myself an Archer. Saber's weak to the Archer class. Why did I not think of that?

[The Geek]

Saber: "I am your sword, Shirou, and you are my sheath."

Shirou: "That's gay."

Saber: "God dammit, Shirou."

[hayate]

My mind went in full gear after watching a certain anime series, so here you go...

Saber: Are you my Master?

Shirou: No.

Saber (blushes in lust as she places her hand somewhere where it cannot be described by words alone): ~ Ah, Master, the way you say it... More, my Master! I want to feel rejected! ~

Shirou: Please don't put it in that context!

[Iceblade44]

....was it konosuba.....