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Thread: What TYPE-MOON Characters Would Never Say REDUX

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    And a dash of salt The Geek's Avatar
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    What TYPE-MOON Characters Would Never Say REDUX

    Since the old thread is dead and buried deep in the depths of the forum, let's create a new thread. It's the same basic premise: just post jokes about different characters based around things that they would never say.

    To start us off.

    Lancelot: Welcome back, Galahad.
    Matthew: I'm not Galahad
    Galahad (in Matthew's head): Technically, you kind of are.
    Matthew: Shut up, Galahad.

    ------------

    Scathach: And you can all call me Auntie Scathach!

    --------------

    Shirou: You know, I once thought the vernacular was a sex organ.
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  2. #2
    Surpass her level, if you dare. hayate's Avatar
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    Scathach: I'm old and I'm proud! You can call me grandma!!!

    Mashu: What's with these clothes, Galahad? Are you a female?

    Shiki: Let us all meditate and be free of any sin. Female Vampire, how can I be of service?

    Arcueid: This whole place blows.
    Last edited by hayate; January 10th, 2017 at 06:32 AM.
    Not dealing with it...

    Why even try?


    This is golden...
    Quote Originally Posted by Altaris View Post
    Lol Ishtarin went full Aqua
    Quote Originally Posted by Optimus View Post
    I've seen people in this forum spend the GDP of a third world country into Grand Order
    Quote Originally Posted by forumghost View Post
    Yeah, there's a saying that you should strive for perfection knowing full well you won't achieve it. Saber looked at it and said "Hold my Beer"
    Quote Originally Posted by forumghost View Post
    And then all her friends resented her for it.

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    Old bastard Walnut Sparks's Avatar
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    Zero Berserker ARRRTHURRR... GIVE ME A HUGGG...
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    Knight of 'Sumanai' Iceblade44's Avatar
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    Mordred: i love my father

    Gil: the whole world is my friend.

    Siegfred: I have no regrets

    Jalter: I think Jeanne is cool

    Edmond: i'm edgy as f*ck!
    "Only in my company, will you not be a monster"


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    祖 Ancestor Alternative Ice's Avatar
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    Caster Cu: The Lancer class sucks.

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    Surpass her level, if you dare. hayate's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Iceblade44 View Post
    Gil: the whole world is my friend.
    Pretty sure that's Gil on CCC.

    Nitocris: BOW DOWN BEFORE ME, OZYMANDIAS!
    Not dealing with it...

    Why even try?


    This is golden...
    Quote Originally Posted by Altaris View Post
    Lol Ishtarin went full Aqua
    Quote Originally Posted by Optimus View Post
    I've seen people in this forum spend the GDP of a third world country into Grand Order
    Quote Originally Posted by forumghost View Post
    Yeah, there's a saying that you should strive for perfection knowing full well you won't achieve it. Saber looked at it and said "Hold my Beer"
    Quote Originally Posted by forumghost View Post
    And then all her friends resented her for it.

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    And a dash of salt The Geek's Avatar
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    Mordred: "You... you scratched my armor. That was a gift from my father."

    Matthew: "I'm sorry, I'm sure your father was a great-"

    Mordred: "I hated my father."

    Matthew: "Oh, then I'm sure your father was a prick."

    Mordred: "HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT ABOUT MY FATHER!"
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    Surpass her level, if you dare. hayate's Avatar
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    Shirou: Hashtag YOLO!!!

    Rin: Seriously, Instagram site is here. You really came from the past.

    Archer: Can't help it though. What's a computer anyway?
    Not dealing with it...

    Why even try?


    This is golden...
    Quote Originally Posted by Altaris View Post
    Lol Ishtarin went full Aqua
    Quote Originally Posted by Optimus View Post
    I've seen people in this forum spend the GDP of a third world country into Grand Order
    Quote Originally Posted by forumghost View Post
    Yeah, there's a saying that you should strive for perfection knowing full well you won't achieve it. Saber looked at it and said "Hold my Beer"
    Quote Originally Posted by forumghost View Post
    And then all her friends resented her for it.

  9. #9
    The smell of the lukewarm ocean and the chorus of cicadas RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Geek View Post
    Mordred: "You... you scratched my armor. That was a gift from my father."

    Matthew: "I'm sorry, I'm sure your father was a great-"

    Mordred: "I hated my father."

    Matthew: "Oh, then I'm sure your father was a prick."

    Mordred: "HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT ABOUT MY FATHER!"
    See, the thing is I can pretty much imagine her actually saying that.

    - - - Updated - - -

    As for my own suggestions on what TM characters would never say...

    Shirou: "Have you ever read the complete works of Ayn Rand? Totally changed my worldview. Altruism sucks and capitalism for the win!"

    Shinji: "Why hello there, Sakura. What may I do for you on this fine day? I've already cooked you breakfast, made your bed and prepared a bath, but if there's anything else my beloved sister desires then I shall gladly attend to that as well. Did I mention how much I love you (in a totally acceptable platonic way, of course) and am totally not at all psychotically jealous of you?" (Imagine him wearing a butler's outfit while saying this for extra OOC-ness)

    Sakura: "Do you what my absolute favorite animal is? Worms. Aren't they just adorable?"

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    And a dash of salt The Geek's Avatar
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    Medb: "Sex before marriage is bad and you should feel bad."

    --------------

    EMIYA: "I love my job."
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    Knight of 'Sumanai' Iceblade44's Avatar
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    Iskandar: fighting is bad and horrible. I like to spend my time solving complicated knots.

    Mozart: this is a grand sanctuary of the arts, anything profane is forbidden here. If i see you spiting out a dirty joke i will tear you alive.

    Marie: give them cake.
    "Only in my company, will you not be a monster"


    anywhere than here

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    And a dash of salt The Geek's Avatar
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    *While Rider is using her Noble Phantasm*

    Shirou: "Tell her to eat shit, Saber."
    Saber: "Tell her yourself!"
    Shirou: "EAT SHIT, ASSHOLE! FALL OFF YOUR HORSE!"

    -----------------

    Gilgamesh: "I mustn't run away! I mustn't run away!"
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    死徒(上級)Greater Dead Apostle Tohno's Avatar
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    T Shiki: "I really respect women."

    FSN Berserker: "Gilgamesh, you uncouth bastard."

    Jeanne Alter: "Teehee! Good morning Master!"

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    Shirou: ''I'm tired of cooking, let's order pizza.''
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    I've learned from a certain Jedi master that when you got the high ground, you automatically win.
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    See, I'd say that the absolutely worst thing about "Prisma Illya" is exactly the sexualisation of children.
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    "I was under the influence of having a gun to shoot somebody."


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    Old bastard Walnut Sparks's Avatar
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    Shirou What, do you think I'm running a bed and breakfast here? Get lost.
    O walls, you have held up so much tedious graffiti that I am amazed you have not already collapsed in ruin.

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    分かろうとするな、感じれ Mcjon01's Avatar
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    Alice, Aoko, & Soujuurou: "Congratulations on completing Mahoyo 2!"

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    Knight of 'Sumanai' Iceblade44's Avatar
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    Shinji: my dream is to become a Hero of Justice.
    "Only in my company, will you not be a monster"


    anywhere than here

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    アルテミット・ソット Ultimate Thot Five_X's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mcjon01 View Post
    Alice, Aoko, & Soujuurou: "Congratulations on completing Mahoyo 2!"
    I'm in pain.
    <NEW FIC!> Revolution #9: Somewhere out there, there's a universe in which your mistakes and failures never happened, and all you wished for is true. How hard would you fight to make that real?

    [11:20:46 AM] GlowStiks: lucina is supes attractive
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    Queen of Love and Beauty GhostDIGIT's Avatar
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    Arihiko: Hey, Tohno, don't crap your pants if you see a vampire out there.

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    The Best Thing BlackBlade's Ever Said.
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    Just watch KNK, read fate and tsuki then just never bother with another nasu thing again but continue to use BL regardless.

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    Nasu: I've finished Tsukihime 2.

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