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Thread: Come Over to my Faction (Grand Order Lemon)

  1. #1
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    Come Over to my Faction (Grand Order Lemon)

    Please be gentle. It's my first time writing several of these characters.

    Fate/Grand Order is the creation and intellectual property of Type-Moon.

    I make no money from this. Please don't send Gudao after me.

    ---

    Come Over to my Faction.

    ---

    Prelude: Flaw and Order.

    ---

    "So, should we be worried? I mean, is it that bad?" the dark haired Fujimaru Ritsuka asked, standing side by side with his sister.

    Ritsuka and Ritsuko were twins, but hardly identical. She was fairly shorter than him, and she sported light orange locks of hair that tended to flow down, opposite to her brother's wilder, spikier black hair, which always seemed wanting to spring around in all directions. He was fairly lean and finely toned, while she was more petite and rounded, prompting her to keep on watching her weight almost constantly. Since getting into Chaldea, however, she had been having no shortage of physical activity, meaning she was rather fit and svelte at the time.

    If the twins were alike in something, it was in how... normal and average they were. On their own, apart from each other, they were often described as being just as non-descript. They tended to blend in crowds, never standing out, and if people ever remembered them at all it was just because they were nice enough to everyone, but they were hardly ever paid any actual, major attention. Until recently, at the very least, when they had been picked up for an internship at a high-paying secret organization.

    When they were together, however, the twins began acting very different from each other, even if because of contrast. Leonardo could tell from the first time she met them they brought something out of each other... something that was mot necessarily their best or worst, but something that defined them beyond the nice agreeable ciphers most people usually saw them, in any instance. Ritsuko in special seemed often irked by her brother's tendency to repeat the obvious and ask things that should have been clear, and in turn Ritsuka seemed to easily grow exasperated by his sister's somewhat impulsive customs.

    Right now, the girl was giving the boy a slight frown that he ignored as his attention was focused on Leonardo, the Renaissance Caster. The black haired woman, a dead ringer for the world famous image of the Monna Lisa, although packing a body that wouldn't quit under the visual point where our references of Gioconda cut off, stood before them at the gigantic chamber where the Leyline Reserves pulsed with ever renewing life, the glowing light that pumped through the Chaldea mystic systems. It was a truly impressive and majestic sight, and every time the siblings were there, they couldn't help but feeling humbled enough they would cut their brief, rapid spats to the absolute minimum.

    Not that they were allowed in there any often, only once or twice before. Access to the chambers was forbidden to anyone but the acting Directors and top technicians of the facilities, and after the losses of Professor Lev, Director Olga Marie and Doctor Roman, the full reigns of surveillance over them had fallen on Leonardo. "Well," the Italian Servant began explaining, "the situation isn't that dire yet, and hopefully it won't get quite there as long as we act quickly. But the fact remains, after the last few blows to our installations, and with the ever growing amount of new Servants, we need a new support system to stabilize our forces."

    "Okay," Ritsuko said, nodding, "just tell us what do we need to do, then."

    Caster sighed as Fou played around her feet, chasing its own tail happily. "This won't be easy for either of you," she predicted.

    "So what," Ritsuko smiled, "we've gone through more difficult things over the last few weeks than anyone would normally would go through their whole lives, right? Trust us, Sensei. Whatever it is, I'd say we should be up for the challenge."

    "Yes, you probably would," Caster nodded. "My Master, however..."

    "Hey," the boy frowned, feeling offended.

    Leonardo made a small, typically Monna Lisa smile. "Sorry, Ritsuka-kun. What I'm trying to say is, well, you are both very brave youngsters, and you've proved being quite able at facing overwhelming odds, but... there are things you are still unexperienced at. That can't be helped. And this is a challenge unlike any other you've faced before."

    "Right, so let's hear about it already," Ritsuko asked, nonetheless feeling more concerned now.

    Caster pondered how to phrase what she would say next. "I thought of requesting for outside help instead of troubling you, but that just wouldn't work. Most of the Servants wouldn't accept the situation, and those who would, well... they would go overboard with it, I'm afraid. Not to mention the Associations are still breathing on our collective neck, and relenting to them for support here would only make us more vulnerable to them."

    "So it's more of a matter that should be handled by expert Magi?" Ritsuka asked.

    "It can't be denied neither of you is a good Magus, in anything but being compatible with Servants," Leonardo admitted. "You aren't familiar with most of the rituals, and pretty much all attempts to instruct you into traditional Magicraft have failed. It's obvious your skills don't lie in that direction."

    "We're sorry, Sensei," Ritsuka lowered his head.

    "Don't be, Master," the Servant told him. "If you weren't born with those aptitudes, then you were blessed with an unmatched ability to bond with Heroic Spirits instead. And that's what we need for this to work out, although it'll still demand a lot from you..."

    "Sensei, please, you're just making us nervous!" Ritsuko said. "Will you stop dancing around the subject and tell us what's asked from us already?"

    Caster looked at them thoughtfully for a moment before gesturing towards Chaldea's reserves of prana, channeled and drained from the rich crossroads of Leylines under the building, at an ideal focal point given to time and space continuum breaks and access. "So far, this has been enough to provide prana for all of us," she said, "and while the reserves themselves aren't in any danger them, we have discovered the means to access them aren't working just as efficiently as they used to. We have the same available prana, but for some reason, probably related to the happenings at Solomon's Temple, we aren't getting all the... mileage, you could say, out of it."

    "So that's why the Servants have been underperforming during practices lately, right?" Ritsuka wondered.

    Caster nodded. "My current theory is, since you are our anchors to this world, to enhance our prana reception and resulting performance, you need increasing the full extent of your bonds with us."

    "Alright, we can do that," Ritsuko said. "It's basically just another Ascension Bond, isn't it? No problem then..."

    "It goes deeper than that," Caster warned, then paused. "Literally."

    "You lost me," Ritsuka admitted.

    "You can't supply Servants with prana through yourselves with the same ease a proper Magus could," Leonardo explained, "and since obviously going out and consuming the souls of what remains of mankind is out of the question, no matter what Signore de Rais keeps suggesting, you will have to establish firmer links from this world to us the... less reputable way."

    "Less reputable than devouring souls?!" Ritsuko gasped.

    "Well, not quite," Caster said, "but you're a modern, worldly girl, Ritsuko-chan. Tell me, from looking at popular culture and social customs about you, what is more acceptable in this era? Discussing terms related to violence and death, or terms related to physical intimacy?"

    Ritsuko instantly paled and jerked back. "Oh my God!"

    Her brother just blinked. "What? With physical intimacy, you mean romance or kissing, right? Yeah, I definitely can see how that would be a problem, but..."

    "Master," the Servant said, staring into his eyes with an air of quiet finality. "You will have to have sex with us if you wish to keep us around."

    Ritsuka blinked, cocked his head aside, and then just cropped like a ragdoll, well unconscious.

    Caster smiled her best, turning to look at Ritsuko. "Well, he at least didn't cry or scream, that must mean he isn't terrified, only shocked. I'd hate to have terrified him. How about you, Ritsuko-chan, are you--"

    A moment later, a small white creature, the closest thing the girl had at hand, was angrily thrown at her perfect, Louvre-worthy face.

    There was a sharp, pained cry of "FOUH!!"

    ---

    To be Continued?
    Last edited by OverMaster; July 9th, 2017 at 12:00 PM.

  2. #2
    Don't @ me if your fanfic doesn't even have Shirou/Illya shipping k thnx ItsaRandomUsername's Avatar
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    I'm not uninterested, especially since you've gone with the underutilized option of having both of the protagonist's possible sexes being represented by way of them being twins. Really opens the door up for (among other things) the wincest tag.

    Followed, for now.
    Last edited by ItsaRandomUsername; July 9th, 2017 at 01:20 PM.
    McJon01: We all know that the real reason Archer would lose to Rider is because the events of his own Holy Grail War left him with a particular weakness toward "older sister" types.
    My Fanfics. Read 'em. Or not.



  3. #3
    死徒(下級)Lesser Dead Apostle shounen jump's Avatar
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    You've got my attention too. Not just because of lots of potential "fun time", but also this doesn't seem like it's going to be one of those one-dimensional "hey sex, @#$% plot or anything that isn't sex" fics. Though please no twincest, or loli. ...Or yayoi, but that's just my preference talking. I don't like thinking of naked guys, so... yeah.
    Last edited by shounen jump; July 9th, 2017 at 02:08 PM.

  4. #4
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    I'm open to have twincest or not according to the readers' answer, not only here but also in other sites where I've posted it (like The Fanfiction Forum). Ultimately, in that regard at least, the majority will speak. If we reach a draw of sorts I'll just pull a Harvey Dent.

  5. #5
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    "Fou fou fou, kyu!" Fou kept on shouting at Ritsuko, from its current perch on Ritsuka's shoulder. "Fou fou, kyu!"

    The girl hissed, gesturing with both hands on emphasis. "I told you I'm sorry, Fou-san!" she insisted, even though she knew Fou shouldn't quite understand her anymore. Her brother marched by her side with an austere, thoughtful expression on his face, and his hands stuck in his pockets. "Seriously, sometimes I can't believe Sensei! What was she thinking?!"

    "Well, she did promise she'd try to think of an alternate way," Ritsuka sighed. "If anyone can that's her, so we should give her some credit, don't you think?"

    "I guess you're right..." Ritsuka mumbled, "but still, it remains a terrible thing to consider..."

    "What is a terrible thing to consider?" asked a grinning, leering face as a Servant made his presence known, greatly startling the siblings and Fou, the small animal dropping from Ritsuka's shoulder and landing on his poor fluffy head with a squeal of 'FOU!' The bony, colorfully flamboyant Caster Mephistopheles cackled throatily as he dropped to the floor before the Masters, straightening himself with ridiculous grandiosity. "I just love terrible things to consider, if there's anyone who can help you with those that's me! Tell me what troubles you, then, for troubles are my other specialty, and--"

    "It's, it's nothing, really, Caster," Ritsuko uneasily said, giving a step back, as she was prone to do in Mephistopheles' presence. She wasn't feeling very fond of Casters this particular day. "We were discussing some slight technical difficulties, that's all. Things you wouldn't deem... fun!"

    "Oh, is that so, Master?" Mephistopheles said, for Ritsuko indeed had been the one to summon him, much to her ongoing annoyance. Then the Servant leaned towards the taller sibling, almost coiling around him, his dangerous grin growing even wider if that was possible. "Can you believe, Dear Brother, my own Master would have so little faith on me? I was a genius' most able helper, after all. Technical difficulties are the third thing I'm the best at! But of course, a maiden will often shy away from bothering men. Maybe you could be more open with me, hmmm?"

    "Caster, that'll be enough," Ritsuko angrily told him. "We're not in the mood for games today."

    Mephistopheles grimaced in an exaggerated way, looking about to burst into tears that would be as comical as grotesque. "Then I have failed to keep my Master's good moods up? Oh, please say it isn't so, Master! That'll just mean your humble retainer will have to work twice, nay, thrice as hard for your happiness," he chuckled, looming over the frowning Ritsuko like some sort of huge, vaguely threatening Jack-in-the-Box. "I realize I haven't been at your side all that often recently, but that always can be remedied..."

    "Fou fou fou fou. Kyu!" Fou opined from the floor.

    "Caster, if you really want to help so much," Ritsuko flatly told him, "the best you can do for now is to stay away until I call for you. Really, your talents are... many and important... but they aren't needed for what we're doing right now, for real. As soon as they are, you can be sure I'll summon you to our side, so why aren't you a good boy and--"

    "Say no more!" Caster pulled back at last, with a hand on his heart. "If my Master wishes it so, this Caster will honor her will to the letter! My apologies, Master, since I see I have added to your trouble with my misguided sincerity. It won't happen again, you have that promise on my honor..." he winked to her as he bowed, swiftly disappearing into his Spiritual Form. Ritsuka and Fou felt him passing past them, by the uneasy trail of spiritual perturbance left in his wake, and they shuddered despite themselves.

    Ritsuko waited until she could not feel him close any longer, and then exhaled in frustration. "Geez, my guard was so low after those news, I didn't even feel him coming. Great, last thing we needed was him on our case, too..."

    "Eh, he's been keeping such a low profile lately," Ritsuka shrugged. "I think he's just lazy enough to even bother to do much mischief. Odds are he'll get distracted by something else and quickly forget about this. It's Tamamo, Brynhildr and Kiyohime who worry me right now..."

    "Yeah, well, they should," Ritsuko said, making a gesture of washing her hands off. "You'd better pray for Sensei to come up with a solution quick, or those three will destroy you at once."

    "Thanks for the sympathy, Sis," the boy observed, "but don't think you would outlive me that much longer then."

    "No. No, I suppose I wouldn't," she quietly admitted. Then she realized something. "By the way, why would he head that way? There's nothing down that hallway but--"

    ---

    Mashu Kyrielight had been buttoning the top of her pajamas when she swiftly turned around, frowning. Even though her full powers as a Demi Servant were gone, she still retained enough perception as to know when another Servant approached, a valuable survival tool when at Chaldea. And she was a greatly changed young woman from when she first had met the Fujimaru twins, so the intrusion of a Servant in her bedroom barely bothered her by this point.

    At first she had thought it'd be Kuro-chan, again making the rounds around the girls and pestering them for prana-recharging kisses. Or Kiyohime-san, once more peeking around to try and see how Mashu's relationship with Ritsuka was going. Much to Mashu's disturbance, however, the Servant who appeared before her now was the lanky, gaudy figure of Mephistopheles. The two of them had never traded more than a few lines of dialogue with each other before this, and in all honesty, all those lines had done little but repulsing Mashu. "Caster-san," she said. "To what do I owe this visit?"

    "Unusual, isn't it?" Mephistopheles smirked, head tilting aside in amusement. "Please forgive this foul fellow's interruption. Oh, sorry, silly me, we aren't fellows anymore. Not since you stopped being, well... special," he let a poisonous tone befall upon that last word, folding his fingers together in mock innocence. His scissors weren't anywhere in sight yet, but that was the only thing about him at the time that wasn't making Mashu wary.

    "You aren't being a bother, Caster-san," Mashu said, trying to be as patient as ever. "Just tell me what's bothering you, please, and I'll do my best to help you. Is it about your Master or--"

    "Well, that's the thing!" Caster shrugged. "I can't tell you what's bothering me, since I don't know what's bothering me!"

    Mashu blinked. "What?"

    Caster began pacing back and forth before her, humming loudly. "Or rather, it's more like I know what's bothering me, but not why it's bothering me. Master and Dear Brother wouldn't tell me. And that's what's bothering me! It bothers me so much, when I'm not trusted, because seriously, what an ugly disservice! To someone as trustworthy and loyal as me! Of course," he paused, leaning towards Mashu to grin placidly on her face, "no doubt they trusted you, sweet, lovely Shielder-who-is-not-Shielder, so I figured you'd be my best bet to try and learn how to help them..."

    Mashu blinked again. "Wh-What are you talking about, Caster-san? Is something bothering the Sempais? I, I had no idea! I mean, we're in the middle of an ongoing emergency after all. Until that's solved, and all stray Beasts are destroyed, they won't rest easy. Are you sure that's not what--?"

    "No, no, no, I can tell it wasn't that!" Caster protested. "They'd have told me so, because why not, right? That's no secret, but this thing that was bothering them, I can tell it was a secret! It's not a secret you share, hiding it from the rest of us, riiiiight? Because we're all a team, that's what Miss Jeanne is always saying, and there's no 'I' or 'Secret' in 'Team', My Dear..."

    "I'm telling you I had no idea what are you talking about," she repeated herself, growing more nervous by the moment. "I was about to go sleep, would I do that instead of being at their side if I knew they were that worried?"

    Caster huffed, raised a fine eyebrow, studied Mashu's face carefully, and ended up shrugging with a goofy smile. "My bad then! Sorry to have wasted your time, but mostly mine! I imagine I should be asking Monna Lisa instead, then..."

    "Leonardo-sensei?" Mashu asked, since some of Ritsuka's Captain Obvious tendencies had rubbed on her through association. "Why?"

    "Why not? She reminds me of the good Doctor, when something bad is happening, she knows everything there is to know about it," Mephistopheles grinned while starting to vanish. "I'm sure she won't turn back on a fellow Caster. Of course, even in the event she does, I'm sure she wouldn't turn you off, should you happen to ask..."

    "I, I'll ask her for you, if that's what you want!" the short haired girl quickly offered.

    "Oh! You would? Thanks, that's so kind from you!" Caster said, little of him but his smile remaining, in a trick that surely would have pleased another Caster with a liking for twisted cats. "Yes, I do believe that would be for the best, too. What a splendid idea, no wonder why Dear Brother has always liked you the most!"

    "S-Sempai doesn't--!" a blushing Mashu began protesting, but by then the Caster had already vanishing, leaving behind nothing but fading echoes of a weak laughter.

    Mashu Kyrielight let her shoulders droop, sighed miserably, and began pulling a coat over her pajamas, then firmly tying it closed.

    Perverse fiend or not he was right on something, asking Leonardo-Sensei on this subject surely wouldn't hurt anyone.
    Last edited by OverMaster; July 9th, 2017 at 04:04 PM.

  6. #6
    The Long-Forgotten Sight Rafflesiac's Avatar
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    Mashu
    I have it on good authority that it's actually Matthew, or in emergencies, Mash.
    Quote Originally Posted by Arashi_Leonhart View Post
    canon finish apo vol 3

  7. #7
    We Want to Protect that Head OverMaster's Avatar
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    I can't take either spelling that seriously, sorry! When I think of Matthew I can't help but wanting to write in questions on who named her like a boy from other characters, and calling her 'Mash' only provokes me into bad jokes invoking the verb 'to mash' instead. For right or wrong I've grown used to writing it as Mashu.

  8. #8
    https://youtu.be/W3KYx1WDqBw Raylen Cypher's Avatar
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    Raff's memeing, don't worry about it.
    Quotes
    Quote Originally Posted by Prix of Heroes
    A world where tragedy is the only measure by which a narrative holds value is not one I am going to live in even where the circumstances in a particular work are tragic.
    Quote Originally Posted by Snow
    If an adult themed work can have graphic slaughter and the like, it can have sex. Just do it competently if you want to go explicit.
    Quote Originally Posted by asterism42 View Post
    How dare you she's a married woman
    Quote Originally Posted by savepoints View Post
    No but why ask him to pull out right before the end tbh
    Quote Originally Posted by Kotonoha View Post
    God is dead and I'm gonna kiss all his cute girl saints
    Quote Originally Posted by castor212 View Post
    MAMA BURST
    A Writer's Fate
    F/GO JP (Updated: 4/11/2019)

  9. #9
    The Long-Forgotten Sight Rafflesiac's Avatar
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    Um, excuse me, I'm not even lowercasing.

    Though as I am a magnanimous man, I'll put up with it.
    Quote Originally Posted by Arashi_Leonhart View Post
    canon finish apo vol 3

  10. #10
    https://youtu.be/W3KYx1WDqBw Raylen Cypher's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rafflesiac View Post
    Um, excuse me, I'm not even lowercasing.
    I know you're not, which frightens me even more so.

    I am a magnanimous man
    *flashbacks to failed rolls and fave servant burnings by other people*

    Quotes
    Quote Originally Posted by Prix of Heroes
    A world where tragedy is the only measure by which a narrative holds value is not one I am going to live in even where the circumstances in a particular work are tragic.
    Quote Originally Posted by Snow
    If an adult themed work can have graphic slaughter and the like, it can have sex. Just do it competently if you want to go explicit.
    Quote Originally Posted by asterism42 View Post
    How dare you she's a married woman
    Quote Originally Posted by savepoints View Post
    No but why ask him to pull out right before the end tbh
    Quote Originally Posted by Kotonoha View Post
    God is dead and I'm gonna kiss all his cute girl saints
    Quote Originally Posted by castor212 View Post
    MAMA BURST
    A Writer's Fate
    F/GO JP (Updated: 4/11/2019)

  11. #11
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    Mephistopheles, visible again, whimsically strolled over the rooftops of the Chaldea base, under the snowy winds that would have deterred if not outright killed any average human. He just made his way with his arms folded behind his back, innocently singing to himself as if he didn't have a single care or worry in the world.

    "Dashing through the snow, like a one horse open sleigh, o'er the fields I go, laughing all the way..."

    The Servant who, as most often, sat on the edge of the rooftop, enjoying the icy touch of the blizzards in silence, enforced her isolated peace and quietness of mind by growling a dry warning. "Stop mangling that seasonal song, Caster. What is your business here?"

    "Bells on bob tails ring, making Heroic Spirits bright," Caster kept on singing, coming closer to Rider, who sat with her back to him, legs dangling over the edge, cold eyes fixed into the majestic horizon line. "What fun it is to laugh and sing, a slaying song tonight!"

    Without deigning to look back at him, the pale Rider in the skimpy black Santa costume pulled her long black sword out of her massive bag of presents and expertly pressed its tip against Caster's throat by merely flipping the weapon over her shoulder. She spoke again in the same dead monotone from before. "It's in bad form for Santa to work out of Christmas nights," she said, "but really naughty boys get a preview of their fair desserts if they get too pushy."

    Caster chuckled apologetically, raising his arms in a placating gesture. "Ah, my apologies, I should have known, but sadly, I never had a childhood to speak of. I'm afraid I'm a bit of an ignorant in the ways of Santa."

    Rider moved her head just enough as to give him a sharp, hostile glance over her shoulder, but the reached into her bag, rummaged through it, and handed Caster a small package wrapped in bright red and green. "Sorry to hear that. Even Santa's not perfect."

    "Oh, how nice from you, Santa!" the Caster laughed shakily, then pocketing the small gift for later. "Sorry to disturb your winterly meditations, but I thought you should know there's something oddly wrong about your reindeer of late."

    Rider tensed up, as much as she would allow herself to. Caster savored the rare moment of getting a raise out of the normally aloof and unreachable Servant. "What's wrong with him?" she demanded.

    "How should I know? I'm no veterinary," Mephistopheles answered. "But I heard him complaining of things going badly for him and his sister, and I suppose that means for the rest of us, though default. I know Santa's duty is restricted to Christmastime, but that doesn't apply when it's about the reindeers in her stables, or does it...?"

    Rider had stood now, scowling at Caster's masque of mischief and trying to read his intentions, which always was a dificult thing with him.

    Caster rubbed himself behind the neck, dragging his chuckle awkwardly. "As I said, I don't know much about the ways of Santa... but I do know, out of all of Reindeer's Servants, you are one of the easiest to locate. You always are here, in the snow, as sure as the sun goes up every morning and sets down every evening. So I came to you before anyone else... well, except for the half-Servant, that is..."

    Rider huffed at the mention of Mashu, for while she held no animosity towards her, she still thought she used to demand too much of her reindeer's time away for Rider's comfort. "What did she tell you?"

    "Oh, you know how reliable she is. She promised she'd look into these serious, important matters Master and Reindeer Brother wouldn't discuss with me for some reason," Caster explained, absently dancing around on the snow, trying to find out how many patterns he could create with his footprints. Beautiful random patterns, all over the place. "Still, better safe than sorry, so I thought I'd better warn you as well..."

    Rider nodded, tucking the sword back into the bag. For now. "You have acted wisely. When a reindeer is troubled, it's Santa's duty to lend her aid, no matter the time of the year."

    "Always glad to be of help," Caster kept on dancing, not even looking as Rider made her way down the rooftop, to enter the Chaldea headquarters while leaving him behind. "Enjoy your early Christmas, Miss Santa."

    Giddily enjoying the buildup growing in his heart, Caster kept on moving with that dangerous grace, that fluid, yet awkward elegance of his motions. Motions that only looked erratic and inconsistent. Had anyone ever endured enough as to keep his eyes on him for any long, they might have seen the pattern.

    "Ohhhh, jingle bells, jingle bells. Jingle all the way. Oh, what fun it is to ride in a two Master open sleigh!"

    It was so nice, not having someone telling you to stop. Or what to do, in general.

  12. #12
    The smell of the lukewarm ocean and the chorus of cicadas RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Aside from the obvious storm of ecchi-mayhem that's brewing here, it's nice to see some focus on Mephistopheles for once. Guy doesn't show up in fanfics too often, and you pulled off his flamboyant personality quite entertainingly. Though out of curiosity, did he always refer to Ritsuka as "brother" in the actual game? Seems a little odd, but then again "a little odd" basically describes Mephisto's entire character so I can't exactly say it's OOC...

  13. #13
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    Okay, would you want for the first chapter to be take its time getting there with pure buildup, or do you want some action soon? I don't want to just jump straight into PWP sex, but I don't want to stall until the cows come home and everyone's bored either. Please tell me when you think it's time to start the lemon content; while I enjoy roping the Servants into knowing there's something wrong one by one, and I'd like to surprise readers with the 'Guess which Servant shows up next', I know there must be an eventual payoff to the buildup or it's all for naught.

    Though out of curiosity, did he always refer to Ritsuka as "brother" in the actual game?
    The thing is, this situation isn't comparable to the game's; in the game there's only one Master, and Mephisto will refer to them as 'Master'. In this story Ritsuko/Gudako plays that role, so it's her whom Mephisto treats as 'Master'. For Ritsuka, since he isn't his Master but his Master's sibling, I had to come up with a different way to address him. It's basically a solution for a change from a situation that wasn't quite the same in canon.

    And yeah, he surprises me with how fun he's to write. I went in not expecting getting much mileage from him, but he's proving to be more entertaining than I thought. Then again, I have some previous experience writing The Joker and usually find him fun to write, so...

    Thanks for the support to those who have commented!
    Last edited by OverMaster; July 9th, 2017 at 06:03 PM.

  14. #14
    The Long-Forgotten Sight Rafflesiac's Avatar
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    Buildup is fine.
    Quote Originally Posted by Arashi_Leonhart View Post
    canon finish apo vol 3

  15. #15
    The smell of the lukewarm ocean and the chorus of cicadas RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by OverMaster View Post
    Okay, would you want for the first chapter to be take its time getting there with pure buildup, or do you want some action soon? I don't want to just jump straight into PWP sex, but I don't want to stall until the cows come home and everyone's bored either. Please tell me when you think it's time to start the lemon content; while I enjoy roping the Servants into knowing there's something wrong one by one, and I'd like to surprise readers with the 'Guess which Servant shows up next', I know there must be an eventual payoff to the buildup or it's all for naught.
    These antics are amusing enough for me, but I think the build-up should come to a climax (so to speak) in one or two more snippets at most. Not like you can't introduce more Servants later on anyways...

    Really though, just do whatever you feel more comfortable with as a writer. I don't want you to rush if it makes the ultimate climax less satisfactory.

  16. #16
    We Want to Protect that Head OverMaster's Avatar
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    Yet again, Mashu rang on the workshop's door.

    "Sensei?" she called out, after failing to get an answer for the third straight time. "Sensei, are you there?" It was well worth asking to make sure, as Leonardo could get so involved into her work she'd often fail to hear the bell even after several tries. This time it wasn't necessary to go that far, however, as the large door went open from the inside as soon as Mashu had asked. "Ah, thank you, Sensei! Sorry to disturb you this late, but... Helena-san?"

    "Oh hey, how are you doing?" smiled another Caster, Lady Helena Blavatsky, as she stood there, separating Mashu from the awe inspiring, often mysterious depths of Leonardo's intricate workshop, filled with all kinds of wondrous developments, works in progress, and overall strange and overpriced random stuff. The short, purple haired Servant was wiping her hands off with a thick piece of cloth, and by looking far into the chambers enough, Mashu could see a huge, steampunk looking machine constantly twitching in place, going up and up on a platform that looked like it barely was supporting its massive bulk. "Oh, that?" Helena casually gestured with her chin towards the device, over one of the shoulders her skimpy black outfit left bare. "An original design Babbage came up with. Leonardo was intrigued and wanted to work on it, so she called me over to give it a look too. Not my usual kind of expertise, but it might have useful applications for my line, so... uh, would you like coming in?" she asked, finally stepping aside as to let the former Shielder walk in.

    "Oh, yes, thank you," Mashu said, adjusting her glasses as she went in. All over the walls there were pinned annotations, both on the machine and on some sort of complicated multidimensional theory, from what little Mashu could glimpse scribbled all over the notes. For some reason, most of those papers included images of the same redhaired boy dying over and over in increasingly stupid and bloody ways. Go figure. "Um, where's Sensei right now? I had something I wanted to ask her..."

    "Oh, she went to a audience with Master and Ritsuka-san a couple hours ago, and hasn't returned yet," Helena casually said. "What, didn't you know about it?"

    "N-No, of course not," Mashu shook her head. "That's strange, isn't it? I mean, not to offend, but..."

    Helena laughed. "It's Leonardo, of course it'll be strange, dear," she said, blissfully ignorant of the 'pot, kettle' implications in her own statement. "Eh, must be some minor mainteinance issue or another. If it were something actually important, I'm sure they'd have called for a general meeting."

    "Yes... I suppose you're right," Mashu had to agree. Odds were Mephistopheles had blown whatever he had heard or thought he heard out of proportion, either sincerely or to mess around with her mind. One way or another, that made little difference now.

    "By the way, Mashu-san," Helena said, snapping her out of her thoughts.

    "Y-Yes?"

    "I know that's not a concern for you either way, now you aren't a Demi Servant anymore, but several of us are rather displeased with our overall drop in performances. Maybe that's got something to do with the private meeting between the Masters and Leonardo?"

    "Come to think about that..." Mashu doubted, "Maybe? But, as you said earlier, wouldn't that be important enough as to merit a full meeting, Helena-san?"

    "Maybe not, if it's a matter concerning the Masters' own status," Caster ventured. "You know there are several Servants who would be quick to blame the Masters if they were told of something like that, and that might undermine our team morals. Still, I figure they'd have told you regardless. Me, not so much, since I'm sure my tongue would end up slipping around Edison..." she had to laugh in admittance.

    Mashu doubted again, unsure of what to answer to that. "Maybe," Helena gently suggested then, "you should discuss it directly with the Masters themselves. You are the closest to Ritsuka-san. Why not to ask him personally?"

    Why not, indeed? Mashu had no good refusal for that, no way of gracefully admitting her feelings of having dropped behind as an useful partner worth remembering or taking into consideration during a crisis, so she only could nod at Helena's question.

    "Y-Yes, naturally. I think I'll go do just that."

    "Good girl," Helena approved with a nod and a smile.

    Good, even if also a little slow, another part of the Caster inwardly added, no less gently, in any case.
    Last edited by OverMaster; July 9th, 2017 at 06:58 PM.

  17. #17
    死徒(下級)Lesser Dead Apostle shounen jump's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by OverMaster View Post
    I can't take either spelling that seriously, sorry! When I think of Matthew I can't help but wanting to write in questions on who named her like a boy from other characters, and calling her 'Mash' only provokes me into bad jokes invoking the verb 'to mash' instead. For right or wrong I've grown used to writing it as Mashu.
    Personally i just like the way "Mashu" sounds.
    Quote Originally Posted by OverMaster View Post
    Okay, would you want for the first chapter to be take its time getting there with pure buildup, or do you want some action soon? I don't want to just jump straight into PWP sex, but I don't want to stall until the cows come home and everyone's bored either. Please tell me when you think it's time to start the lemon content; while I enjoy roping the Servants into knowing there's something wrong one by one, and I'd like to surprise readers with the 'Guess which Servant shows up next', I know there must be an eventual payoff to the buildup or it's all for naught.



    The thing is, this situation isn't comparable to the game's; in the game there's only one Master, and Mephisto will refer to them as 'Master'. In this story Ritsuko/Gudako plays that role, so it's her whom Mephisto treats as 'Master'. For Ritsuka, since he isn't his Master but his Master's sibling, I had to come up with a different way to address him. It's basically a solution for a change from a situation that wasn't quite the same in canon.

    And yeah, he surprises me with how fun he's to write. I went in not expecting getting much mileage from him, but he's proving to be more entertaining than I thought. Then again, I have some previous experience writing The Joker and usually find him fun to write, so...

    Thanks for the support to those who have commented!
    The reason he isn't used often could be because he's like the Joker: His idea of a joke involves people exploding gorily.
    Quote Originally Posted by Rafflesiac View Post
    Buildup is fine.
    What he said.

  18. #18
    Don't @ me if your fanfic doesn't even have Shirou/Illya shipping k thnx ItsaRandomUsername's Avatar
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    Lady Helena Blavatsky
    .........go on.
    McJon01: We all know that the real reason Archer would lose to Rider is because the events of his own Holy Grail War left him with a particular weakness toward "older sister" types.
    My Fanfics. Read 'em. Or not.



  19. #19
    夜魔 Nightmare
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    PROCEED.

  20. #20
    We Want to Protect that Head OverMaster's Avatar
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    Ritsuko sat on her bed now, hugging her knees against her body and sulking angrily on the events of the day.

    It wasn't that she was completely against the idea of striking a... steamy romance with at least some of her Servants, but she found the idea of having to sleep around with most if not all of them too disturbing to consider it seriously. What was she, some sort of deranged serial sexual predator in a gag manga? She had a standard, traditional middle class Japanese upbringing, and while in this day and age that didn't mean she dreamed of making it to the wedding a virgin, and she was nowhere as clueless at getting hints as Ritsuka, she wanted to at least have a relatively normal monogamous relationship with a man. Nothing too out of the ordinary.

    At that point, of course, it was when she had to remember her last few months had been anything but normal, but the idea was they'd get to retire for good as soon as the threat was vanquished... wasn't it? It made no sense, involving herself in a wide web of illicit affairs with men and women alike (and a few of those men were, like, REALLY creepy) only to drop them shortly later, forever. It felt wrong somehow, and with 'somehow' she meant 'in every and all possible ways!'

    Besides, not only she balked at the idea of having relationships with, let's say, Illya-chan, but as far as men concerned, and while several other Servants were fine and remarkable men on their own, what was the point when she already had one the others just couldn't compare to?

    "Gilgamesh-sama," Ritsuko sighed, absently tugging up on her bedrobe with a hand as the other made its way between her legs.

    Ritsuko wanted to believe she had, slowly, bit by bit, earned enough respect from her most difficult and unattainable Servant, the Golden Archer, for her to have 'earned' the right to fantasize about him without feeling diminished. At first she had detested his guts, and she could easily tell he thought of her as little but a gnat, but over time she'd come to think he wasn't that bad, and indeed, their relationship had thawed off enough to at least resemble some measure of mutual cordiality, especially after Babylon. She knew he already thought of her as a woman, not helping but taking notice whenever she entered a room. He'd even stopped hitting on Artoria-san in her presence (which in turn had led to Artoria-san increasing her time spent around Ritsuko). Whenever Ritsuko slipped and said something stupid in his presence, he by now would usually pretend he hadn't heard it and ignore her, while he never missed a chance to relentlessly mock her brother or the other Servants over similar missteps.

    Ritsuko knew that still was wrong, that he still was too overbearing, domineering and posessive for a healthy relationship, but she at least could daydream about him now. There was no harm on only going that far, right? And seriously, how to deny he was, physically, the peak of male desirability? Even his most bitter enemies and detractors in and out of Chaldea couldn't refute the fact he was a perfectly chiseled and honed demigod, a golden, unstoppable larger than life engine of irresistible conquest. Ritsuko liked power, she couldn't blind herself to that, and Gilgamesh was power itself made man.

    She pulled her panties aside and gently touched the small pink button with her pointer and middle fingers, her bare toes curving against her bedsheets. She let out a heavy sigh, starting one of her imaginary plays where he would come to her, as naked as a newborn, radiant and glowing in all his splendor as he knelt before her and called her "My Queen." In the background, she could hear Ishtar-san squealing in impotent, distressed rage, and that only would add to her pleasure.

    Ritsuko was a good girl, and in her everyday life she fought hard to keep being that way, but the way she saw it, there was nothing wrong with cutting loose in her dreams. So she did exactly that.

    She sighed and twisted her fingers, over and over and all around, expertly touching herself as she thought of making Gilgamesh, feared, ever boastful Gilgamesh, lick the soles of her feet, suckle on her toes, begging her for more as she laughed and gently pressed down on his scalp with a hand. Making him know his place.

    "Um, yes, like that..." she purred, closing her eyes and struggling to keep her voice low. Leonardo had offered to make the walls between her bedroom and her brother's sound proof, but the female Master was forced to reject the offer after realizing she had to hear it whenever Medb broke into Ritsuka's room to claim his purity (and a pair of times, even Kuro-chan had tried such a stunt, too! Apparently, despite of Kuro-chan's average inclinations, she made an exception for him claiming he reminded her of a brother back at home, which only raised even more questions...)

    The irony of Medb's thwarted attempts being actually part of Leonardo's emergency plan now wasn't lost on Ritsuko, but she would rather not think about that. Not when she would prefer thinking about herself mounting and subduing her gold Servant, pretending the hand on her crotch was his, and that it was his mouth pulling and pinching on her right nipple, rather than her other hand.

    In her imagination, the proud, unyielding First of Heroes whimpered under her, taking his gorgeous head back, her prisoner, her slave. "Please... Master..."

    "Say the words," Ritsuko gasped, both in fantasy and reality, hoping Ritsuka couldn't hear her.

    "I want you... I need you..." Gilgamesh would beg, as she licked her lips all over, her clothes all discarded aside for a better full access to her body.

    "Those aren't..." Ritsuko swallowed, strained and needy in reality, aloof and confident in pretend, "the words I want to hear, Gil-kun..."

    "I love you..." he would say, and only then she would let him enter her, right like now her fingers were entering her most provate of places...

    "Anhhhhhh...!" Ritsuko groaned, jerking in place as her modest sized breasts jiggled as much as they could, attacking her own core with the same fiery passion she would employ on riding her man. Because it didn't suffice with just any man, of course. As long as you're aiming for the stars you should aim for the highest...

    ... even if that's only an illusion.

    "Fuck," Ritsuko swore, using but one of the many words she only would allow herself in private, alone with her thoughts. "Fuck fuck fuck. Fuck!" she hissed, doubling unto herself while fingering her privates even faster, looking for the sweet, sweet release. "Gilgamesh!" she yelped, stiffening one last time and almost crying, before plopping on her stomach against the sheets, with pink cheeks and a lolling tongue, gasping hard for air as she felt comfortably woozy and relaxed. For now, at least, she was sated, and thus she allowed herself a pleasant, rewarding drift into the lulling realm of unconsciousness.

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