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Thread: Monthly Create-A-Servant Contest

  1. #121
    Inanity is my Speciality 87's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bird of Hermes View Post
    Meanwhile the Create a Mage contest has one day to go and only had about 5 this time around. Pity really.

    I think this contest may have stolen that one's thunder a bit as well. Perhaps we could alternate in the future?

    i.e. Monthly Mage followed by Monthly Servant and so on

    so that they don't lose steam or conflict with each other

    Also, I think that I'll probably just do the "PM me your sheet when it's done and I'll post them all at the end" thing. For the next one. To clarify, not this one. But possibly the next one. Don't pm me your sheet if it's a Saber.

  2. #122
    三十四 ThirtyFour34's Avatar
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    is this contest still open for submission? anyway, here's my Seibah.



    Class : Saber
    Alternate Class : Ruler, Rider
    Identity : Umar ibn Al-Khattāb
    Origin : Middle-East (c. 584 – 644)
    Alignment : Lawful Good

    PARAMETER
    STR : A
    END : B
    AGL : B
    MGI : C
    LCK : C
    NP : EX

    CLASS SKILLS
    Magic Resistance : A
    Is a skill that grants protection against magical effects, by canceling the spells altogether. Saber gained this skill at high rank due to his divine blessings and piety. At this rank, this servant is untouchable by modern magi, and will cancel A-rank spells or below, no matter what High-Thaumaturgy it is. This skill is extremely useful for fighting magus.

    Riding : C
    Is a skill that denotes the ability to ride mounts and vehicles. At this rank, Saber can handle most animals and vehicles with above average skill. However, he cannot ride the likes of Phantasmal Species such as Monstrous Beasts.

    PERSONAL SKILLS
    Paragon of Faith : A
    Is a skill that represents one’s religious influence and reverence that made their act and deeds as an example and model to others with same faith. Saber is regarded as one of the most influential person in Islamic faith and he had made several important religious developments.

    Because in Islamic faith there is no “Saint” concept, Saber is given this skill instead. This skill has a similar effect as the skill “Saint”, it gives Saber the ability of one of the following : “Automatic healing”, “Rank-up to Charisma” and “Divine Protection”.

    Strategy : B+
    Is a skill that represents one’s ability to seize things on broader perspective, such as logistics and diplomacy, in order to decide victory before the fighting even begun. This skill gives bonus to the effectiveness one’s own Anti-Army Noble Phantasm and when dealing with enemy’s Anti-Army Noble Phantasm. Saber gained this skill due to his many successes of expanding the territory of Rashidun Caliphate not only by using tactics on the battlefield, but also using carefully made and detailed plans beforehand. His famous feat includes eliminating the Persian Empire and severely weakening the Byzantine Empire. He can expand his empire further, but he refused to sacrifice any more soldiers. The Romans want to retake their territory, but they don’t have sufficient troops nor supplies left to fight, and their allies has been eliminated.

    Charisma : A
    Is a skill that represents a person’s charm as well as the talent and ability to command an army or unify a nation or country. Saber was known as a really effective and skilled ruler, he was also a political genius and a gifted orator who would use this ability to get the soft corner in hearts of people, which granted him this skill at high rank. This skill allows the owner to gain allies more easily. At this rank, this skill has become more like a curse, which needs Magic Resistance or mental defense of sufficient level to resist.

    Discernment of the Poor : B+
    Is a skill that gives the owner insight to see through the character and attribute of those around him, which means that they will not be deceived by deception and excuse from other’s word. Despite being a Caliph, Saber does not live extravagantly, instead he chooses to live like a simple commoner, he lives in a simple mud hut and he really cares about the lives of his people. To ensure that nobody sleeps hungry in his empire, he used to walk through the streets almost every night to see if there is any one needy or ill, thus he gained this skill at high rank. At this rank, he is basically a living lie detector. This skill is important to use one of his Noble Phantasm more effectively.

    "His food consisted of barley bread or dates; his drink was water; he preached in a gown that was torn or tattered in twelve places; and a Persian satrap, who paid his homage as to the conqueror, found him asleep among the beggars on the steps of the mosque of Muslims."
    -Gibbon, The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire.

    NOBLE PHANTASMS
    Sayf al-Umar
    Sword of Umar
    Rank : D
    Type : Anti-Unit
    A nameless sword that Umar always used in his life. It is a typical Arabian sword that doesn’t have much special feature or decoration, but possessed some traces divine energy. Its special feature is its cutting power that can cut through most armor with ease, combined with Umar’s own strength and skill, this sword has a quality worthy of Noble Phantasm.

    Amir al-Mu’minin
    Leader of the Faithful
    Rank : E-A+
    Type : Anti-Army, Anti-Army (Self)
    A Noble Phantasm that is gained as the manifestation of Saber’s brilliant leadership on both managing his Empire and organizing his troops on the battlefield. A rare title that was given to him by his people, Amir al-Mu’minin, which means “Commander of the Faithful” it’s a title that serves as the proof of his numerous achievements and deeds that engraved his name on history.

    When activated, Saber will generate an enchanting aura that gives a boost to the fighting ability of Saber and those around him, as long as they had some degree of ‘faith’ or ‘belief’ in something that’s worth fighting for. The higher their faith, the more their ability will be improved, but doesn’t work on enemies, instead it has similar negative effect on his enemies, which lowers their fighting ability and morale, and become worse if their faith in something is lower.

    Another aspect of this Noble Phantasm is that, the more people affected by this aura, the more Saber’s own parameter and fighting ability would be boosted, this aura has a range of 1 km and also affect civilians, even though it doesn’t have much effect on them aside from raising their physical ability slightly based on their faith level. This Noble Phantasm needs considerable amount of magical energy to maintain, but can last longer the more people affected.

    Al-Farook - Kiraman Katibin
    Right & Wrong - Merit & Sin
    Rank : EX
    Type : Anti-Existence, Anti-Shirou
    A Noble Phantasm that is obtained as the crystallization of Saber’s title “al-Farook” given to him by Prophet Muhammad. “Al-Farook” means ‘distinguisher between right and wrong’, which refers his expertise on distinguishing which can be considered “right” and which can be considered “wrong”, like true and false, good and evil, and other concepts of ‘right’ and ‘wrong’.

    When activated, Saber will temporarily summons 2 divine spirits, the Kiraman Katibin, the Islamic Angels of Merit and Sin Scribe, Raqib and Atib, which represent ‘right’ and ‘wrong’, along with a set of divine writing tools. By doing some sort of role reversal, Saber will be the one that judges the enemy’s level of rightness and wrongness, by writing it on his own record book, and then one of the Angels will ‘punish’ them by erasing one of the aspect between ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ of the target from the Angel’s own Noble Phantasm, Record Book of Merit or Sin, thus removing the proof of their deeds or possession from existence, ceasing it from existing altogether, this means Saber can remove the target’s Noble Phantasm, Skills, memory or even identity from existing in this timeline. This Noble Phantasm can only be activated if the target is within Saber’s vicinity.

    To use this Noble Phantasm more effectively, Saber needs to know about the identity or nature of his target first, the more knowledge he has concerning the target, the more things he can remove from the list on the Record Book of the Angels. This Noble Phantasm will become more effective if the target has many qualities that can be considered ‘true and good’ or ‘false and evil’. The target can resist or avoid this Noble Phantasm by interrupting the act of judgment and punishment before the Angels erase their record, if interrupted long enough, the Angels will disappear without delivering their ‘punishment’. Because of only one of either ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ aspects can be erased, it is important to choose which one to record on the book.

    Spoiler:
    PERSONALITY
    Saber is a wise, charismatic and somewhat emotional man that has robust physical build. He likes sports and always looks forward to try out new types of physical sport. Despite his quite menacing appearance, he is very intelligent and kind-hearted. However, he despises those who disturb the peace of the community, and willing to use violence to silence peace-disturber. He also really cares about the lives and well-being of others, and feels responsible to make their lives better.

    He treats his Master as really well and is very obedient towards their orders, as long it doesn’t violate his religious values. But if he consider his Master as a dangerous person who may cause destruction and suffering to others or has malicious intent, he will not be hesitant to sacrifice his own life to kill them. He doesn’t have a wish for the grail, because of his religious belief.


    Short Bio

    Hazrat Umar (RA) is considered one of the best role models for Muslims from different aspects. All the roles he undertook in his life are an ideal example for Muslims of every generation. The lines below give a brief biography of Hazrat Umar (RA).

    Early Life:

    Hazrat Umar (RA) was the son of Khattab. He was initially a non-Muslim but converted to Islam later. After his becoming Muslim, he was given the title of “Al-Farooq” meaning the one who distinguishes the right from wrong. His conversion to Islam is also one of the most remarkable events in Islamic history.

    Election:

    Before his passing away, Hazrat Abu-Bakar (RA) after consultation with other Sahaba, elected Hazrat Umar (RA) to take charge as Caliph after his passing away. Thus, he became the Second Caliph of Muslims.

    Umar (RA) as Caliph:

    All the four Caliph are renowned for one or another accomplishment. Hazrat Umar (RA) is recognized for his discipline, administration, and the conquests that took place during his reign. During his reign, the Islamic empire stretched to Persia, Rome and even brought Egypt under the Islamic flag. During his Khilaafat, he brought reforms and worked extensively on the welfare of his subjects.

    Conquest over Romans:

    In the reign of Hazrat Abu Bakkar (RA) Muslim army laid siege of Damascus. However, after his passing away, when Hazrat Umar (RA) took the charge,t he Muslim army under the leadership of Hazrat Khalid bin Walid (RA) conquered Damascus. The Governor of the city surrendered and a treaty was signed.

    Appointing of New Commander:

    Muslim armies were conquering areas leaps and bounds under the leadership of Hazrat Khalid bin Waleed (RA). Seeing this, Hazrat Umar (RA) changed the commander and made, Hazrat Abu Ubaida bin Jarrah (RA) the new commander of Muslim army. The reason why he did this was, because he was afraid that Muslims will start associating all the victories with Hazrat Khalid bin Waleed (RA) instead of thinking them from Allah. Secondly, all such victory and recognition might have brought arrogance in Hazrat Khalid bin Waleed (RA), therefore, he called him back, and Hazrat Khalid bin Waleed (RA) gladly obeyed his decision.

    Victory over Persians:

    After several sieges and defeats at the hands of Persians, Muslims at last achieved victory over Persians during the reign of Hazrat Umar (RA). He had to send several reinforcements to ensure that the Muslim army conquered the army of Rustum. Muslim army defeated Persians in 14 A.h.

    Jerusalem Conquest:

    In his reign, Muslims also conquered Jerusalem. The Christians of the city decided to accept defeat against the siege of Muslim army. The ruler of the city gave the keys to Hazrat Umar (RA) personally, and a treaty was signed that guaranteed the safety of citizens of the city.

    Reforms:

    Hazrat Umar (RA) brought numerous reforms in the governance during his reign. Some of the major reforms introduced by Hazrat Umar (RA) are:

    The establishment of Bait-ul-Maal (State’s treasury for people) was one of his major achievements.

    A proper Judicial system was established, where Magistrates and Judges would have courts and would decide on cases.

    Army headquarters were established for protection of country.
    Canals and roads were constructed.

    The Imams, Teachers and Moazzins were given pay in schools and Mosques.
    Prisons and Police station were built.

    The first Islamic Lunar calendar was established and the Hijrah system was initiated.
    Population census was made.

    Welfare homes and orphanages were built.

    Assasination:

    Hazrat Umar (RA) was assassinated by a Persian non-Muslim named Firoz. He stabbed Hazrat Umar (RA), as a result of which he passed away three days later on 1st of Muharram.

    Last edited by ThirtyFour34; Today at 12:15 AM.

  3. #123
    Inanity is my Speciality 87's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ThirtyFour34 View Post
    is this contest still open for submission? anyway, here's my Seibah.

    still like 2 weeks, you're good

  4. #124
    Pale Pink Memories Sunny's Avatar
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    Mrgh. Trying to distract myself until the next time I can take some medicine, and this is as good a way as any.

    I wonder why I'm less listless with a prompt, even a general one. I may end up withdrawing this and moving it to CAS since I feel kind of iffy submitting two, even if the rules permit it. If not many other people do, I think that's what I'll do.

    Class: Saber
    True Name: Watanabe no Tsuna
    Alignment: Neutral Good


    Source

    "Hello, Master! You've done well to call upon the strongest of the Shitennou, Watanabe no Tsuna.
    Tell me, which of my tales inspired you? The incident at Rashomon?
    The time we slayed the giant spider of the earth?
    No, no, surely the daring escape at Modoribashi Bridge.
    Or perhaps, the one where..."

    Parameters:
    Strength: A
    Agility: B
    Endurance: B
    Mana: C
    Luck: B
    Noble Phantasms: B

    Height: 162 cm
    Weight: 50 kg
    Likes: Swordsmanship, travel, talking to new people (about herself)
    Dislikes: Demons, silence, being forgotten
    Talent: Storytelling, slaying demons
    Natural Enemy: Ibaraki Douji, Minamoto no Yorimitsu
    Attribute: Earth
    Traits: Earth, Riding, Brynhildr's Beloved
    Armament: A crimson tachi sword, with inscriptions of its different names along the length of the name
    Catalyst: A netsuke sculpture of Watanabe no Tsuna fighting off a demon on his back

    Class Abilities:
    Magic Resistance
    Rank: C+
    Cancel spells with a chant below two verses, but cannot defend against magecraft on the level of High-Thaumaturgy and Greater Rituals. She has a remarkable resistance to Japanese or demonic related magical foundations.

    Riding
    Rank: B
    The ability to ride mounts or vehicles. At this rank, most vehicles and animals can be handled with above average skill, including even vehicles that did not exist in the time period one was alive in are no exception. However, she cannot ride the likes of Phantasmal Species such as Monstrous Beasts

    Personal Skills:
    Demon Hunter
    Rank: A
    A skill bestowed to those who made it their purpose to hunt down and slaughter demons or hybrids with demonkind. Saber gains plus modifiers to her strength and endurance when battling demonic enemies as well as all sorts of checks and saving throws. As a passive ability, at this rank, Saber not only hunts but actively attracts demons, making encounters with Servants or spirits with demonic blood or anecdotes in their legend more probable.

    Bravery
    Rank: A
    The ability to negate mental interference such as pressure, confusion and fascination. It is difficult even for powerful coercion and curses to interfere with Saber's fighting proficiency. Or rather, her killing instinct is finely ingrained to the degree that it does not rely on her thinking at all. At this rank, it also has the bonus effect of increasing melee damage.

    Conceptual Improvement (Self)
    Rank: B
    The unfair advantage of improving any tool, from any given time or place. A bow becomes stronger, a sword becomes sharper, an axe becomes heavier, etc. In this case, the tool able to be improved is limited to Saber herself, who viewed her life as a tool for the benefit of rebuilding her clan's name. By reducing oneself to a tool and devoting her life to self-publicity, reinforcement and bolstering of Saber's skills and legend become possible.

    Noble Phantasms:
    Sun-Nashi - A Demon Cutting Through All Equals
    Type: Anti-Unit
    Rank: B+
    The famous tachi of Watanabe no Tsuna, a weapon that bore many names during its lifetime. For cutting through the steel of other blades to make them the same size, it was named Tomokiri, or Friend Cutter. For smoothly decapitating the head and beard of a criminal, Higekiri, or Beard Cutter. For slicing off the arm of the oni Ibaraki Douji, Onikiri, or Demon Cutter.

    A sword of many names, Sun-Nashi is particularly proficient for changing its nature. As a Noble Phantasm, Sun-Nashi bears the ability of switching its properties by cutting or clashing with other weapons or armaments, allowing it to temporarily take on a new name and graft that title to its many anecdotes. Combined with Saber's ability to manufacture and refine her own legend, temporary acquisition of even the effect of other weapons is possible, at one rank lower than the rank of the original item.

    This is a digression, but no matter the result, Saber's naming sense leaves something to be desired, be it Excalikiri, Caladkiri, or even Rulekiri. No matter the effect, she simply loves the sound of cutting. In this sense, she got along well with another uncreative Golden child.

    Rashomon Dai Kiri - Great Triumph of Rashomon
    Type: Anti-Army
    Rank: B
    An embodiment of the legend in which Watanabe no Tsuna drove off the feared oni ringleader, Ibaraki Douji, cutting off her arm in the exchange. While the limb was later recovered by Ibaraki, Saber retains it when summoned as a Servant, as a token of her prime as a slayer of demons.

    While often concealed behind the ribbon worn on her back, Saber carries the severed arm attached to her obi, and may activate it by calling on its true name. Once activated, the arm of Ibaraki stirs to life, operating remotely alongside Saber. While it hates her, it reluctantly fights alongside her, awaiting the chance to reunite with its true owner. Should it see an opportunity to strike Saber down, however, it no doubt would.

    In addition, as it is the severed but still living arm of the oni Ibaraki Douji, it is capable of expressing Oni Magic at one rank lower than the rank of this Noble Phantasm, allowing limited use of Prana Burst (Heat), Monstrous Strength, Natural Monster, etc. However, these abilities apply only to the arm itself and bestow no direct reinforcement on Saber.

    Lore:
    Spoiler:
    A member of the Shitennou of Minamoto no Yorimitsu, Watanabe no Tsuna was famous for attracting countless demon attacks during her life, and became known as the leader of the four heavenly kings. Tsuna was most famous for the incident at the Rashomon gate, fighting off Ibaraki Douji who had been terrorizing Kyoto and slicing off her arm as a trophy of battle. Ibaraki would later return to steal the arm back in the guise of Tsuna's grandmother. In another incident, a yokai asked Tsuna to escort her home, only to transform into a hideous demon and grasp at the samurai's hair. While Tsuna cut off the hand and killed the demon, their hair was forever bleached at the ends where they were grasped.

    In reality, Watanabe no Tsuna's name did not appear directly in any Heian literature of the time, even in tales with Raikou and her band of warriors, emerging for the first time in a collection of tales previously spread only through oral recitation. Some scholars have even speculated the legends of Watanabe no Tsuna to be created by Tsuna directly, as many of the episodes include the history of the Watanabe clan, leading to the theory that Tsuna purposely self-promoted the clan to restore the power of their faction.

    While it is true that Watanabe no Tsuna traveled with Yorimitsu, and perhaps even true that she was one of the heavenly kings, it is probable that the truth beyond that has been terribly distorted in the goal of rebuilding a dishonored family name. The extent of his skill, the number of demons he killed, his title as the leader of the Shitennou, and perhaps even his gender - how much is true and how much is propaganda?


    Personality:
    Spoiler:
    Boastful and proud, Saber is unlikely to ever conceal her identity from a would-be Master, or perhaps even her enemies. To the contrary, she delights in telling her own tales, and is prone to even comparing her current battles to ones she is famous for in history.

    Due to her Conceptual Improvement, Saber's personality has also been warped from what it was in life. In particular, she has self-inserted a powerful directive for slaying demons, granting her a compulsion to immediately slaughter those with demonic or monstrous blood, as well as the instincts to hunt them down. A murderous compulsion built into the reflexes of her own body, not unlike that of a certain other demon-hunting family of the East.

    Should she meet one of the other Shitennou, or even worse, Yorimitsu herself, this self-promotion would falter for the first time, faced with one who can directly contradict her many falsehoods. Yorimitsu in particular terrifies her, as her installed demon-killing urges conflict with her fear for tarnishing her own legend should she fail.
    Last edited by Sunny; July 23rd, 2017 at 11:28 PM.


    And that's why... This life is for you.


  5. #125
    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Umar: Definitely well-written and fleshed out, though there are a few parts worth critiquing.

    First and most minor, Discernment Of The Poor at the same rank as Karna (the "Hero of Charity") seems a bit iffy to me. Suggest lowering it to B-rank. Second, the sword NP feels like filler. I'd suggest just scrapping it unless you can think of a more distinctive effect, as not every Saber/Lancer/Archer needs their respective armament as an NP (heck, Atalanta's bow is far more worthy of note then this guy's sword and yet it wasn't an NP).

    Lastly, the third NP- while very interesting conceptually- is kind of poorly described to the point where I'm having trouble getting my head around its effects. More clarifying would be nice, as well as less long and rambling sentences. (When one sentence takes up almost the entirety of your fairly sizeable paragraph, you know you've gone overboard)

    - - - Updated - - -

    Tsuna: Dang it Sunny, why are your sheets so good? It's positively unfair that you happen to post not one but two entries that are ridiculously fun, well fleshed-out and creative! What are you leaving for the rest of us?!

    Seriously though, this was a damn good sheet. Lots of creative flair and her boastful personality sounds quite entertaining as well. Her sword basically allows for Mega-Man style power-copying which is amusing, and I really love the oni-arm NP. (Say, was that by any chance an instance where the FC influenced the sheet or did you just happen to find one incredibly fitting to what you had in mind?)

    Either way, I love the imagery of her summoning this giant demon arm wrapped in Buddhist sutras for an ORAORAORA style punching barrage.

  6. #126
    Pale Pink Memories Sunny's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RoydGolden View Post
    (Say, was that by any chance an instance where the FC influenced the sheet or did you just happen to find one incredibly fitting to what you had in mind?)
    Guilty. ^^; I wasn't intending to write her, but the image made me think of Ibaraki's arm, which snowballed into research, then skill selection, then drafting and trying to work in some of the features of the FC into her sheet. In any case, it was a welcome diversion and it kept me nicely distracted at a bad time. Stupid eight-hour between useage limitations.

    Thank you, though as I said, I'm not sure yet which one I'll keep. (Please no influencing the decision, I am indecisive enough by default!)

    Finding out Tsuna actually did have bleached hairtips from a yokai encounter and actually does have an iffy claim to fame just helped.


    And that's why... This life is for you.


  7. #127
    Character Image/Faceclaim:
    Spoiler:

    Source:
    Marie & Gali, an Anime (from this link:https://animewriter.wordpress.com/20...ing-loli-goth/ )


    Class: ​Saber
    Other Classes: Caster, Berserker, Assassin.
    True Name: Sir Isaac Newton
    Alignment: Chaotic Good
    Place of Origin: England
    Parameters:
    STR: D
    END: A+ (relative to mental fatigue, against other types of damage it is D)
    AGI: D
    MGI: D
    LCK: D
    NP: EX

    Height: 1,71 m
    Weight: 63 Kg
    Likes: Mathematics, Physics, Symbolism, Puzzles;
    Dislikes: Counterfeiting, Ignorance, Tricky Women;
    Talent: Solving problems;
    Natural Enemy: Leibniz, EMIYA, Einstein, Darwin, KoTR;
    Attribute: Star;
    Traits: Servant, Humanoid, Resistant to Enuma Elish, Brynhild's Beloved.

    Class Skills:
    *Magic Resistance: B+

    The ability to resist magical effects. Saber's is B-ranked because of his many studies about alchemy and other forms of occultism, which gave him a good understanding to how magecraft works and how to counter it. As it was not his greatest field of expertise, he couldn't reach a higher rank. This skill cancels spells with three verses or less and severely weakens High-Thaumaturgy and Greater Rituals. A "+" modifier is applied against the Sacraments of the Holy Church, because as Saber researched a lot upon their sacred texts and didn't agree with their philosophy he needed to prepare himself to fight against executioners which could take him for heretic, leading him to study deeply their methods, totally nullifying them

    *Riding: D
    Denotes how much one is skilled in guiding mounts and vehicles. As Saber is from a time after the Age of Gods and before the Industrial Revolution, he has not seen nor driven either Phantasmal Beasts or motorized vehicles, only having an average ability to mount horses.

    Personal Skills:

    *Natural Born Genius: EX
    Skill that shows the unparalleled natural knowledge one possesses. As Saber in life was a prodigy like not many, making countless contributions to nearly all fields of science, he gains this skill at EX-rank. The mathematician Joseph-Louis Lagrange credited him as the greatest genius that ever lived, to the point of saying Newton was "the most fortunate, for we cannot find more than once a system of the world to establish". This skill allows the use of most other skills that exist, bar those inherent to the body, like Mana Burst or Natural Monster.

    *Principia-Innovation: A--
    Innovation is a skill given to Heroic Spirits which brought forth revolutions during their eras. Newton’s most famous studies, the ones that laid the foundation for classical mechanics and that allowed the Scientific and Industrial Revolution after his death were collected in a collection of three books by the name Philosophiae Naturalis Principia Mathematica (“Mathematical Principles of Natural Philosophy). This version of the skill allows Saber to control the action of the laws of mechanics and gravity on his sword and anything it touches. Possible uses include increasing the force of impact, allowing strikes with power well beyond what his STR parameter permits, effectively reaching EX-rank, and floating away from attacks by modifying his own gravity by touching himself with the blade. The “--“ modifier is because of his class, which isn’t focused on his achievements, and restrains the use of this skill to only two times per opponent. Were Newton a Caster this skill would be EX-ranked and the only restriction would be the need of touch.

    *Pioneer of the Stars: EX
    A skill given to Heroic Spirits which represent turning points in human history. Newton has this due to his advancements in mathematics, optics, mechanics, astronomy and others, without which mankind’s technology could’ve never reached the point it has today. It makes problems and situations that seem “impossible” to solve to become “feasible”. Can be used to gain an extra usage of Principia-Innovation. As said in Newton’s grave:

    Here is buried Isaac Newton, Knight, who by a strength of mind almost divine, and mathematical principles peculiarly his own, explored the course and figures of the planets, the paths of comets, the tides of the sea, the dissimilarities in rays of light, and, what no other scholar has previously imagined, the properties of the colours thus produced. Diligent, sagacious and faithful, in his expositions of nature, antiquity and the holy Scriptures, he vindicated by his philosophy the majesty of God mighty and good, and expressed the simplicity of the Gospel in his manners. Mortals rejoice that there has existed such and so great an ornament of the human race! He was born on 25 December 1642, and died on 20 March 1726/7”. —Translation from G.L. Smyth, The Monuments and Genii of St. Paul's Cathedral, and of Westminster Abbey (1826), ii, 703–4.

    *Mental Pollution B+
    Makes resistance to mental interference-Thaumaturgy possible due to a distorted mind. Saber was known as an eccentric in life and to have sudden temper changes, which probably were a consequence of his dangerous alchemic experiments. Against “normal” magecraft it grants a probability of 65% to shut down mental interference, with the “+” meaning an upgrade to 90% and applying to effects born from alchemy, as his death was probably due to excessive mercury poisoning, showing he had built some kind of natural defense against its products to be able to resist for such a relatively long time.

    *Royal Knight: A
    Skill possessed by those Heroic Spirits which held the title of Knight by the absolutist monarchies of Modern Age Europe. It gives the ability to use military related skills such as Charisma and Military Tactics at C-rank and equates the swordsmanship of the owner to that of any opponent he faces, regardless of origin or parameters. Newton has this skill due to being knighted by Queen Anne of Great Britain, notably the second scientist from his country to receive this honor, after Francis Bacon.

    Noble Phantasm(s):
    Spoiler:
    Newton's Flaming Laser Sword
    Insurmountable Razor of Mystery

    Type: Anti-Unit/Anti-Mystery
    Rank: EX
    Range: 1-100
    Max Targets: Number of Servants in the Area of Effect

    The true reason for Sir Isaac Newton to be summoned as a Saber. Actually not something he himself developed but a term coined by Australian mathematician Mike Alder to name a philosophical razor which says, “what cannot be settled by experiment is not worth debating”.

    Having his name attached to such a concept and its origin based in Newtonian Thought made his materialization as a Saber possible and gave birth to this Noble Phantasm. It manifests as a seemingly common 17th century sword, which can, however, be set ablaze and shoot D-ranked white laser beams (a kind of laser which mankind has yet to develop, but about which is theorized to be much more powerful than monochrome lasers. Newton can use it due to his discovery of the decomposition of white light).

    When the True Name is invoked it activates the properties of the razor, erasing all abilities born from Mystery and/or Divinity being used in the area of effect. As Newton himself wasn’t actually a skeptical man on the matters of occultism and only believed that they had logical and mathematical explanations, the Noble Phantasm actually steals whatever Mystery is being used and gives it to Saber (or whoever the holder wants) to use.

    Its application has low Mana cost and can be used to “no-sell” the likes of Divine Constructs such as Excalibur, Photon Ray, Ea and even the Noble Phantasm rain from the Gate of Babylon, but the cost of what is stolen remains the original, so without a very good supply of Magical Energy the use of stolen abilities will be restrained.

    Noble Phantasms born from actual historical facts and feats instead of myths such as Iskandar's Ionioi Hetairoi, Drake's Golden Wild Hunt or Nobunaga's Three Thousand Worlds cannot be stolen.

    Ea is a special case that as the “Star of Creation” from which everything is born it cannot be used by someone “normal” like Newton, because he can’t comprehend it.
    Source: Myself


    Lore:
    Spoiler:
    Newton knew of the Clock Tower and the Mage’s Association, and worked with a family of alchemists to find a way to reach the Root. Newton believed that the Root was nothing more than the mind of his God and wanted to reach it so that he could gain the ultimate understanding of the divine creation. Rumors say that his research built the foundation from which the Einzberns restarted their quest to reach the Third Magic and that it was something like a prototype of the Greater Grail, but no one is sure. Also, it is not known if the family which worked with Newton weren’t the Einzberns themselves.

    What remains of this study is jealously kept safe by the mages who hold them, but most of the pages reside at the Clock Tower.

    He also worked with the Atlas Academy in the study of the Photonic Crystal that one day would become TRI-HERMES, the Spiritron-Supercomputer.

    The first version of the Mystic Code Volumen Hydrargyrum (Kayneth’s mercury ball, from Fate/Zero) was created by him.


    Personality:
    Spoiler:

    Truly a bizarre one. Normally he is classy and elegant, expressing a “holier than thou” attitude both in conversation and battle, but this is when what is before him doesn’t interest him. When faced by something or someone interesting his behavior changes completely, becoming passionate and adopting an “over-the-top” personality.

    Due to Mental Pollution, it is impossible to have a serious conversation with him and unless it’s something that he finds exciting he will just adopt a cold attitude and fake attention to whatever matter is being presented with responses like “hm. Hmmmm. Hum, hum. Yes. No.”.

    His wish for the Grail is to live once again for the time needed to reach the complete knowledge of creation. He won’t use it to reach the Root because that is something he wants to do with brains, nor brawls. In his words: “Fool! The perfection of God cannot be found by such a bloodbath! God wants us to reach Him by hard work and perseverance, without shortcuts! It is our duty to create a path exclusively for ourselves!

    Relationships:
    Spoiler:
    If his Master picks his interest he will be to them something like a best friend or a proud older brother, fighting for them till the end, sharing their dreams and hopes. If the Master is boring to him he will just ignore his requests and do everything by himself, but his lack of passion in doing it, together with subpar parameters, will likely end up with both being killed.

    Fighting against Einstein he would show a deep respect for his many great works, but the fact that he discovered that his equations weren’t totally correct would lead to a friendly rivalry where one would try to surpass another.

    Faced by pagan and mythical heroes such as the Greek ones or the Knights of the Round Table he will admire their “pagan” powers and weapons, because they are something beyond his understanding and he wants to know more. However, his attitude against them will be pretty bashful, laughing at them for their religious beliefs, saying that their abilities come also from his God.

    Against Leibniz he would immediately unleash all powers he stole with his Noble Phantasm, only wishing to kill him without mercy. Of course, Leibniz also would take out the big guns as his first action in such encounter. Such a situation would even bypass the restraints from Principia-Innovation.

    EMIYA/Nameless would be an insult to him and he would do everything for the “Hero of Justice” to show his Noble Phantasm at once so that he can erase all the counterfeits with the Insurmountable Razor of Mystery. This is because when in life Newton acted as Warden of the Royal Mint a lot of counterfeit coins were being used in the country, and he made ending with this crime (which, at the time, was punishable by hanging) his mission. This made Saber incredibly intolerant to any falsification. His acting disguised in taverns and bars for the sake of this during his time is what qualifies Newton for the Assassin Class.

    Newton wasn’t good with women, and becomes flustered around them. He believes most women are cruel and untrustworthy, but if his Master is a girl and picks his interest he might end up falling in love with her and assuming a tsundere attitude.


    Creator Notes:
    It was since I discovered that something called “Newton’s Flaming Laser Sword” existed that I wanted to do a Saber-Class Servant sheet for Newton, and this contest gave me the drive to do it (twice, the first one got lost because of login shenanigans). Well, hope you all enjoy this crazy guy (and concept)!
    Last edited by TamamoRoute; Yesterday at 12:56 PM. Reason: Added a paragraph to the Noble Phantasm Section.

  8. #128
    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Newton: At first I thought this was just a fairly good (if a little wanked) Newton sheet, barely even registering the oddity of him being a Saber. Then I got to the NP and... well, you can likely imagine.

    Seriously though, I highly doubt something attributed to him so long after his death could qualify as an NP, much less such an incredibly powerful one, but since the whole concept is basically a joke anyways I can't really criticize on that front. Though despite being a "joke-Servant" this is actually very well-written and fleshed out, so I applaud you for putting effort into this guy regardless of the flagrantly silly concept.

    I particularly like the flavor in his Personality section. Him having a Gilgamesh-style hatred for "counterfeiters" was an amusing touch. I'm a little surprised though that, given you listed his interactions with various other scientific and philosophical figures there was no mention of how he'd interact with William of Ockham, who his NP is clearly based off of. (Plus, y'know, I happen to have written up an Ockham sheet myself a while ago)

    The only real critique I can make is that giving him both POTS and Innovation seems a little unnecessary since they both capture similar concepts, but given the silliness of the sheet feel free to take this with a grain of salt.

  9. #129
    Pondering for new ideas. SleepMode's Avatar
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    Newton: Can't really leave reviews until due-date, but let me say this:

    This is one of the craziest Servant Sheet I've seen in a while, and I got a good laugh out of it. Good job!
    Last edited by SleepMode; Yesterday at 12:23 AM.

  10. #130
    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SleepMode View Post
    Newton: Can't really leave reviews until due-date, but let me say this:

    This is both one of the most creative and crazy Servant Sheet I've seen in a while, so good job for your first sheet!
    ...Wait, this is their first sheet? Yep, that's definitely crazy-awesome...

  11. #131
    三十四 ThirtyFour34's Avatar
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    is it okay to submit more than 1 sheets?

  12. #132
    Inanity is my Speciality 87's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ThirtyFour34 View Post
    is it okay to submit more than 1 sheets?
    Read the OP

    It's there for a reason

  13. #133
    リビングデッド Living Dead chem24's Avatar
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    Just a small issue, but I'm pretty sure Strategy already exists in canon as Military Tactics.

  14. #134
    モーホーMEN Nuclear Consensus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by chem24 View Post
    Just a small issue, but I'm pretty sure Strategy already exists in canon as Military Tactics.
    Quote Originally Posted by castor212 View Post
    oh, the difference is pretty cool, [Strategy] is more about preparation before fighting the army while normal MT is about when fighting the army
    .
    SHARE THIS LUCKY BATHORY TO PASS YOUR EXAMS; IGNORE TO FAIL

  15. #135
    Quote Originally Posted by RoydGolden View Post
    ...Wait, this is their first sheet? Yep, that's definitely crazy-awesome...
    Well, not exactly my first sheet but the first I've posted somewhere. I have written other sheets for a Fate/Extra AU with different Servants and Masters but I only gave detailed descriptions for the Noble Phantasms, while skills had only names and ranks, not explanations. Lore and other things went together with the NP. I also have a Fate/Grand Order-style sheet for a Lancer Bedivere written somewhere in a notebook from when I was having a boring college class and wanted to not fall asleep, but this one is game-focused.

    So...yeah, probably this is the most detailed sheet I've ever done

  16. #136
    吸血鬼 Vampire Omida's Avatar
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    Okay, so after over a year of absence I have returned. Broken computers suck when you are lazy :V

    Anyway, here is my entry, just to shake rust off


    Faceclaim

    How can you have no idea whom you summoned?! Well... I guess I can't exactly fault you, can I?

    Class: Saber
    Alternate Class: Berserker
    True Name: Yagyuu Juubei Mitsuyoshi, Unrivalled Swordsman Under the Heaven
    Alignement: Chaotic Neutral
    Place of Origin: Japan

    Height: 1.76 m
    Weight: 75 kg
    Likes: refining his technique, travelling
    Dislikes: lull, staying in one place for too long
    Talent: swordsmanship
    Natural Enemy: Yagyuu Juubei
    Attribute: Earth
    Traits: Lack of Records, Demon Blood, Genius Swordsman, Teacher of Shoguns
    Armament: A well made katana, the only noteworthy thing about it is lack of hilt
    Catalyst: sword hilt that he used as eye patch


    STR: B MGI: D
    END: B LCK: C
    AGI: B NP: C


    Class skills:

    Magic Resistance: B
    Protection against magical effects that cancels spells altogether. While little is known about Saber's encounters with magic or their lack, his powerfull demon blood allows him to brute force his way through most of magecraft with relative ease.

    Riding: C
    Ability to handle mounts and vehicles with average skill. There are no records indicating Saber's exploits on horseback, though given the realities of the era, it can be safely assumed, that he possessed such a skill if only to speed up travel.

    Personal Skills:

    Inversion Impulse: E~A
    State of being, where one's mind is overpowered by inhuman factors of their body in exchange for power. Demon blood of his family flows strong in Saber's veins, granting him fit body that is impossible to diminish. Saber's physical attributes cannot be negatively affected, and should he give in to his blood, he can enhance them even further at the cost of bits and pieces of his mind, until he 'reverts' completely, losing himself to blood-crazied demon.

    Knowledge of Respect and Harmony: B
    Ability that prevents degradation of technique's effectiveness, no matter the repetition. Saber's supreme skill with sword coupled with his mastery of both, his body and mind, made him completely unreadable to all he faces. Skills that deal with providing information on one's fighting style based on observation and experience simply won't work, while instinctual understanding will be diminished.

    Vitrification: A~E
    Serene state of mind that protects one from mental interference. Saber's demonic blood was responsible for many restless years and took it's toll on him. To combat his heritage, Saber begun his pilgrimage to clear his mind and become master of both, his body and his mind. However, if he were to start using Inversion Impulse, ranks of both skills would began to reverse, as he looses his peace for power.


    Noble Phantasm:

    Spoiler:
    Musha Shugyo: Warrior's Pilgrimage of Twelve Years
    Type: Anti-Unit/Self
    Rank: C
    At the age of 24, Yagyuu Jubei was dismissed from Tokugawa court under unclear pretences. There are many theories, ranging from account of his blunt personality being unsuited towards courtly life to being send as Shogunate's spy. The truth lies in Saber's demon blood, which had grown unruly with time, and so, Jubei decided on pilgrimage to master himself.

    Musha Shugyo is crystalization of the twelve years during which there are no records at all regarding life of Yagyuu Jubei and the only things that exist are rumors, folc tales and fictional stories that sprung throughout his absence and after his abrupt return.
    This Noble Phantasm allows Saber to draw on skills that he could have potentially have mastered (or was assumed to already possess) during his pilgrimage and draw and wield any relics and artefacts of power that were attributed to his adventures, no matter if he were summoned with them.
    It's a subtle Noble Phantasm requiring no upkeep save for activation cost and once activated, it cannot be turned off, as Saber already begun his pilgrimage.

    Coincidentally, since Musha Shugyo came to be as a result of lack of information about Saber's life, once activated, besides it's active effects it will function as Information Erasure of C-rank. Saber's activities and deeds won't be magically erased, but they will appear less note-worthy than they are, and others will find it easy to forget about them. All attempts to recall details of Saber or of his actions will bring forth only hazy memories full of holes, that one's imagination will fill with what they find most sensible.
    Examples of available skills

    Presence Concealment: C
    Animal Dialogue: D
    Blood Sucking: D



    Personality

    Extraordinarily proud of his skill with sword and status as teacher of shoguns, Jubei is nevertheless laid back and will speak his mind if he thinks he has something to contribute. It is easy to see why rumours would make his dismissal be due to personality completely incompatible with the court,
    as thanks to his (insufferable) genius he always has something to say, if only as a commentary.

    He is a bit restless from the days before mastering his demon blood, and thanks to his pilgrimage, he retains a love of wandering aimlessly, often infuriating his master when he turns on the other end of the city than where he is needed.

  17. #137
    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Omida: Wow, I remember you from way back when I first got an account here. Long time no see!

  18. #138

  19. #139
    リビングデッド Living Dead chem24's Avatar
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    I'm actually pretty surprised venomking hasn't participated, although that's probably for the best. :V

  20. #140
    Quote Originally Posted by Express View Post
    Oh wow, I hadn't read the other entries yet. I hadn't even realized somebody made a Mehmed for this.

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