Fuyuki City.
A city where only the strongest can survive.
A place where those without jobs or home cannot live in happiness.
-Yes, this is the story about that city.
That city, and the man who lived there.
The man who would be eventually known as…
GTO
Gilgamesh Teaches Olympics
// Lesson 2: It is clichéd nowadays to have a dark version of self!
/// April fourth.
// Saturday
Teaching is not as easy as one might think. Having done that for three days now, I realized just how much even those mongrels have to go through to educate their own children.
Well, it’s to be expected. It’s not like everyone can be born in all their, knowing all and being capable of everything, like my glorious self! A normal mongrel has to work hard and study well before his parents agree to buy him his first Nintendo DS, that is what I have learned during my time in this place called school.
However, it is not all about teaching. This became apparent as I was stopped by the Tiger-woman as I was about to exit the teachers’ office.
“Gil-chaaan~, do you have a minute?” she waved her arms up and down, half-jumping towards me.
True enough, somebody (other than my dear Saber-chan) would have been skewered in place by my Noble Phantasms for calling me that, but let’s face the reality and be merciful: This woman introduced me to a place where I could be a king again. She had earned my gratitude.
------- And a true king always shows his gratitude!
“What is it, woman? I am quite busy at the moment”, I answer. And that is the actual truth. Even though I have been a teacher for three days, I have not still found a place to sleep. So far, I’ve been forced to sleep inside my own vault, in the original bed.
------- Unfortunately, even that is gold. And thus, it is not comfortable.
“Gil-chan, I’ve been hearing that you have problems finding an apartment right now. Is that true?” Tiger-woman asks. Little surprised, I nod.
“That’s right. I do have that kind of problem.”
“Oh, well, in that case~! I think I might have a solution to your problem.” Her words were surprising. However, before I could express my gratitude, she waved her finger in front of my nose. “Buuut~, there is something I would like you to do me for helping you out.”
…
“What is it?” Suddenly, everything feels far less tempting.
“Oh, it’s nothing big! Just go check the archery-club for me today, can you? We can then later meet down at Shirou’s for dinner, and discuss about your apartment problem. How about that?” she asks.
To be honest, I’m torn between these two things. Checking archery-club means more work for me, but new apartment and free dinner sound tempting…
---- Oh! Of course! If dinner is at that Faker’s house, that means...
SABER-CHAN WILL BE THERE!!!!
“Ahahahaahaa! Of course I can check the archery-club for you, woman! I’ll then come straight to that Faker’s place, so we can discuss about the apartment”, I answer enthusiastically.
“Okayyy~! I’m counting on you, Gil-chan~!”
---- Chance!
Saber-chan’s going to be there tonight. And if she’s there, I know exactly what I will do. When Tiger-woman is there, none of them can attack me, and that is when I will execute my daring and perfect plan…
“Mwahahaha…mwahahahaha…FUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA A!!”
My laughter echoes through the school’s corridors as I rush with all my might towards the archery dojo.
// -------------------------------
Observation one: The archery range is a rather nicely cleaned place. It seems so clean, I could spend some more time in here.
Observation two: All of the people in the archery-club are either women or children. They are not worth my time, thusly.
Observation three: There is one familiar face here.
“Oh? If it isn’t my former Master. You seem to be looking rather…slimmer…than last time we met.”
I cannot stop myself from grinning sadistically as I see the seaweed-boy.
“HIIIIIIII!!! S-stay away!! Stay away!!! Don’t touch me or I’ll tell my grandpa, and he’s the PTA chairman of this school!! He’ll get you fired immediately!!! HIIIIIII!!!”
Shinji Matou seems absolutely delighted of seeing me.
“Hmm? What are you screaming here, Shinji? Matou, could you come get your brother?? He looks like he’s on a edge of nervous breakdown”, a brown-haired girl arrives at the scene, and calls other female student who’s standing close-by.
Plum-haired girl walks up to the seaweed-boy, shaking her head with pity in her eyes, before starting to drag him by the collar to the exit.
“You sure are troublesome, Nii-san. But at least you can now keep some company to uncle Kariya by twitching with him”, she says, trying to sound positive, as the Matous exit the range.
“Damn that Shinji, always causing trouble…” Brown-haired girl sighs, before glancing at me with her hazel-eyes.
“Oh, you’re that new P.E teacher, Gilgamesh-sensei, was it?” she asks, before breaking into confident smile. “I’m captain of the archery-club, Mitsuzuri Ayako. Nice to meet you face-to-face, sensei. I the last P.E lesson you held. You got everyone in the class moving, even that damned Shinji.”
She laughs like a boy before nodding to herself.
“So, what business do you have here, sensei?”
“Oh, I’m just here to check the archery-club for that Tiger-woman. She ran off to god knows where”, I explain the situation. Mitsuzuri Ayako grimaces.
“Damn that Fujimura-sensei…leaving all her responsibilities to others. Well, no can do. Follow me, and I’ll show you around a bit.”
After that, I got a tour around the archery range, while Mitsuzuri Ayako explained about all the things that happened around here. To be honest, I was impressed that these mongrels had managed to achieve something like this. Not only were they pretty talented, but they had gotten quite famous throughout the country, and sometimes even got to nationals.
Our tour ended in front of the actual shooting area, where students shot their arrows to the targets far away.
------------------ Needless to say, something like that got my blood as Archer boiling.
“Hmm, this looks interesting, woman. I think I might try it out.”
“Oh? You have practiced archery before, sensei? That’s quite surprising”, Mitsuzuri Ayako looked surprised. “But that’s to be expected, I guess. They wouldn’t hire a man with no knowledge about different sports to the position of P.E teacher.”
IRONYYY! The ironyyyy!
“Wait a sec, then, sensei. I shall get you a bow and-“
“No need, woman. I can do this by myself”, I interrupt her.
Mitsuzuri Ayako looks at me confused. As she opens her mouth to clarify what I just say, instead of explaining, I just raise my hand above my head, take a good look at the target, and…
Snap!
THOOMTHOOMTHOOMTHOOMTHOOMTHOOMTHOOMTHOOOOOOOM!!!!
Eight Noble Phantasms are launched in rapid succession to the target, skewering it and destroying everything in the area, including the target. Oh, and it looks like one of them accidentally punched a hole through the wall behind the targets.
“Wha-wha-wha-wha….WHAT DID YOU DO, SENSEI!?!?!?”
Ah, Mitsuzuri Ayako looks like she has lost all her composure, instead just staring at the smoking remains of the target now with her mouth hanging wide open. And behind her, the whole archery range has same kind of expression.
“Oh, this? This is how a king handles his archery. All the other forms are for mongrels, women and children, ahahahahahahaahahahaaa!”
My hearty laughter echoes through the archery range. It has been a while since I’ve had the chance to use some of my skills for fun, so of course I feel great.
“Ah, that was refreshing, woman. I’ll be sure to visit the archery range again, if I feel like I shooting something.”
“”””NO! PLEASE DON’T, SENSEI!!!!”””
The unified yell cuts the air, and before I realize it, everyone else but the still-shocked looking Mitsuzuri Ayako is performing a dogeza before me. Mitsuzuri, noticing this, smiles at everyone.
-------- That vein pumping in your forehead looks dangerous woman. It seriously looks dangerous.
“Now, now. Sensei can come whenever he wants. However, if sensei breaks things, sensei has to fix them, riiiight~?” she turns to face me…
…Only I’m no longer there.
That tone of voice just nooooowww! It was like Saber’s, it was fierce like Saber’s!!! The moment I heard it, I knew I had to run away! That is why I’m good distance away from the archery range before a yell pierces the air of the school grounds:
“SENSEI, GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE!!!!”
Observation four: Mitsuzuri Ayako is a fearsome woman.
However, at that time I had no idea…
That something even more dangerous than Mitsuzuri Ayako had awoken in the school grounds…
Because at that moment, out of my sight and out of my hearing range…
Three voices plotted something sinister.
“I told you he was cool! Just look at that! I definitely need to have him!”
“Maki, calm down. We need to take this slowly and carefully if we want to succeed.”
“E-excuse me, but…why are we hiding in shadows?”
Yes…I did not know it back then…
But my life was already in danger.
// -------------------------------
“Fuji-nee…what is the meaning of this?”
“Hmm? What, Shirou? I told you a co-worker of mine would be coming over for dinner so we could discuss about something I promised to help him in.”
“B-But…why is that co-worker…him!?”
Faker’s finger points at me over the table, and I stop stuffing myself with rice.
“Believe me, I have no interest in being here with you Faker. Only thing I’m interested in is…” I turn my eyes to face the woman on the other side of the table, who jerks back with fierce look on her face, as I leap forward towards her. “SABERRR-CHAAAAAN~!”
“Stay back, King of Heroes!!!”
TWHACK!
My jump is intercepted as King of Knights thrusts her chopsticks straight to the area between my eyes, causing me to jolt backwards.
----------- What was that about, Saber-chan!? I knew that Mongols of old times used to eat eyes, but your people did it too!??!
“Well, Gil-chan does not have his own apartment, so I had to help him out, didn’t I? Onee-chan is not so cold hearted as to leave a fine young man to sleep on the streets”, Tiger-woman explains.
W-why are you all staring at me that way!? Why do all your gazes look like you’re thinking: “How is that fine young man”!? Damn, you mongrels!! Damn you!!
“W-well, anyway, woman. You said you’d have a solution to my problem. Tell me”, I say, attempting to divert the bad direction this conversation was heading.
“Oh, yes. You see, Gil-chan, right now, there is this unused shack on the roof of the school. I’ve held the key to there until now, as I’ve used to store my stuff in there. But since you’re in need of a place to stay, I thought about giving that key to you! That place even has an old futon I once brought there!”
…
Ugh.
I’m not sure whether I should be grateful or angry at this Tiger-woman. However, the situation is that I have little choice. That is why I grudgingly extend my hand.
“I would be grateful if you’d let me sleep there”, I say, trying to hold back my grimace. Really, I was hoping that she would have let me sleep here somewhere, so I could have spent some more time with Saber-chan, but…
“Yosh!!! Now, let’s have a toast for Gil-chan and his new home!”
But…
“Oh, woman, wait up. I have perfect thing to toast with. Wait a minute.”
But I still have my plan number one!!!
I extended my hand to grab something from my vault, which opened up a little enough for me to fit my hand through. From there, I brought forth five glasses, one-by-one. One for the Faker, one for Tokiomi’s daughter, one for Saber-chan, one for Tiger-woman, and one for myself. Tiger-woman seemed more than pleased, and even all the others did not have anything to complain about.
HOW NAÏVE!!!
Sure enough, the rest were different kinds of alcoholic beverages I had brought forth from my vault (All originals of course. They were even served in golden glasses.). However! One of them did not contain just a mere beverage! No. One of them had inside my fabled Potion of Youth. And that glass was now in the hands of Saber-chan. The green liquid would soon turn her body into that of ten years old, and then…
AH~AAAAHN!!!
It was too moe to be thought about!
“To the new apartmeeeent~!!” Tiger woman yelled out loudly and raised her drink. Others followed the example, thought less enthusiastically. Even Saber raised her glass filled with orange liquid before giving me an hard look.
…
…?
….!!!
Orange liquid!?
“Nooooooooo!!! Don’t drink thaaaaaaaaattt!!” My yell was like in one of those movies of this time, with lots of slow-motion.
However…I was too late.
Saber drank the liquid, and…
POOOOFFF!!
“”“Coughcoughcoughcoughcough!!”””
What emerged was a large cloud of smoke, as if somebody had let out the original fart in this room. Although it was not golden, of course.
However…my plan had failed!!! Saber had not drank the Potion of Youth, but…! But…!
“Gilgamesh, what did you do!?” Faker asks me with furious face. However, I do not have time for his petty mongrel-talk. The situation is dire.
“I tried to give Saber-chan the Potion of Youth that would have transformed her body into that of ten years old!” I explained. To my surprise, Faker nodded almost understandingly.
“Ah, that goal…I can understand it, King of Heroes”, he said. However, the angry glares of the women around him shut him up quickly. He got back his angry expression. “So, why all the smoke???”
“She drank the wrong potion!! If it is what I think it is, then…!”
As I spoke, the smoke cleared out. And under that smoke, sitting Japanese-style like nothing had happened, eating their lunch, were…
Two Sabers.
“””WHAAAAT!?!?”””
And the other one was wearing black! It was…
SABER ALTER!?!?!
“G-Gilgamesh…do you have any idea what kind of mess you have brought upon us…?” Shirou asked with strange voice as he stared almost fearfully at the duo of Sabers.
“E-Emiya-kun, isn’t this solved if we…” Tokiomi’s daughter said, before turning towards me and smiling devilishly. “Just have Gilgamesh take care of Alter-san?”
W-what?!
“Ah, Tohsaka, good idea. It is your fault after all, King of Heroes.” Faker did not look any more sympathetic than the black-haired girl. Especially not when he turned around to face the two Sabers. “Ah, Alter-san, you’ll be going with Gilgamesh tonight, got that? He said he’d have a place in his house where you can sleep.”
W-WHAAAAAT!?!?
As my dreams crumble before my very eyes, Saber Alter moves her eyes from the food laid before her and locks her cold gaze to me.
“I’ll be in your care, then…” she said with voice that had no warmth. “Keep your fridge full of hamburgers, of I’ll crush your balls.”
NOOOOOOOOooooooooo!!!!
Don’t say vulgar things like that with my dear Saber-chan’s voiceeeeee!!!
Reply With Quote
Originally Posted by Komrade Kwestions
