Wanted this to be my April Fools sheet, but I couldn't be bothered to finish in time, and Nobu was already done, so... Meh.
>>Keeper<<Class Skills\
Artoria Pendragon
Alignment: Lawful Maid
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Strength: B
Endurance: C
Agility: A
Mana: A
Luck: B
Noble Phantasm: C
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Character details
>Stewardship: [B]
It denotes a Servant's mastery in various forms of management, ministration, and housekeeping. As the "chief maid," Keeper would typically possess the highest rank in this skill, but her domineering disposition towards the staff and guests and how she behaves like a tyrant even when addressing her Master has lowered her rank to B. Still, this rank is more than enough for her to be considered a "Top Class Maid".
>Chief of Staff: [A]
Acts as a replacement for Charisma. As the chief maid of the estate, Keeper possesses authority over the rest of her staff. Her commands can occasionally even override her Master's and allow her to utilize his Command Seals. She also will immediately know the identity of anyone who takes a step on the estate's premise. While on her Master's territory, Keeper will obtain A-rank Charisma, A-rank True Name Discernment, C-rank Presence Detection, and can utilize her Master's Command Seals so long as he is within the estate's grounds.
>Territory Restoration: [B]
Being worthy of the Class for Heroes of the Estate requires more than masterful administrative skills or unparalleled housekeeping capabilities; one must be able to literally 'keep the house intact'. Considering how much damage her battles do to her surroundings, Keeper herself believes she would be disqualified as a maid outright if she did not possess this Skill.
While she cannot create a territory advantageous to herself, with this Skill she can repair a previous territory she was the established guardian of back to its former pristine state, even without having all of the proper materials at hand. This is the miraculous work of one who dedicates her very being to the well-being of the estate.
Personal Skills\
>Magic Resistance: [A]
A Servant's ability to resist thaumaturgical effects. Having been born with the blood of the red dragon, Keeper's existence is akin to a high class phantasmal species, giving her the highest grade of resistance. Even full verse spells and greater rituals will not harm her. She is the natural enemy of modern day magi; a magus slayer.
>Riding: [B]
Denotes a Servant's capacity for piloting various modes of transportation. At B rank, Keeper is capable of skillfully all but Phantasmal Beast species and dragonkin.
Useful for trips to the grocery market and driving the young Master to school.
>Mana Burst: [C - A]
An ability where one amasses and then instantaneously jettisons mana from a part of the body, resulting in a destructive burst of power. Ordinarily, Keeper would possess the highest rank in this skill, but since she did not wish to damage her Master's home with her excessive magical energy, through her authority as Chief of Staff she used a Command Seal ordering herself to hold back while inside or within close proximity to the house. After enough distance has been put between it and her, the original rank of this Skill will be restored.
>Instinct: [A+]
The ability to feel the best path for oneself during combat. At A rank, Keeper's highly attuned sixth sense is now akin to premonition.
She receives bonus modifiers when trying to figure out the most efficient and effective way to clean the house, manage the estate, order about the staff, and help the young Master with troublesome questions on his homework.
Noble Phantasms
Last edited by AvengerEmiya; April 3rd, 2017 at 10:56 PM.
Servant Butler EMIYA when
Localizationing stuff
Have to say, that Maid Arturia sheet is pretty amazing. The juxtaposition of having this ridiculously epic mythical figure dedicating herself wholeheartedly to such a mundane role is an old trope, but you certainly pulled it off in an amusing way. The amount of NPs she has is kind of absurdly overloaded, but it is a parody sheet and each of them has so much creativity and flavor that I wouldn't suggest scrapping any of them.
I'm especially fond of Caval, because the territory regression idea is creative as heck, and the holy virgin one (not even going to try pronouncing that), because the idea of a wannabe Virgin Mary traipsing about and causing shenanigans at the Emiya household is unspeakably hilarious.
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One's actually been done already somewhere, but unfortunately it was pretty boring and generic (basically a reskinned EMIYA with some housework related Skills), without nearly the flavor or creativity of this one.
...That's disappointing. Hopefully someone can do the Ideal Butler some actual justice, I however struggle to make a joke sheet of any sort for some odd reason.
Anyways, I'm curious about what you think about my Efnisien sheet, so I can see if there's any problems with it.
By the way, this reminds me, is "ordinary boy/girl gets thrown into a world of magic from their dead parental figure's inheritance and ends up with a supernatural butler/maid/familiar" an idea that's been done to death? The idea feels like a cliché to me but when I think of it I can't actually remember any series to have portrayed it "straight". (The closest I can think of is Black Butler, a uniquely dark take on the "magical butler figure" archetype)
Thinking of how AE's maid!Artoria could fit into a fanfic like that, in case it's not obvious. Though the idea would require enough tweaking of canon it'd probably be better spun off as original fiction...
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I'd say you did him justice. Contemplated doing a sheet for that guy myself once, but could never come up with an interesting enough NPs.
The dagger NP is a creative idea that represents his legend well, and the second one is a fitting take on the "suicide attack" idea. Overall quite well-done.
Quality memes and quality stats for all of Arthur's lesser possessions.
Quest of Fate
Apocrypha Universe Fate Quest Project
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Beast's Lair Discord Server For Fate Quests
Hermes Servant Collection Master Post
Best Artoria of the Year, hands down. Chapeau!
Seriously, AvengerEmiya, this piece is so good that you should attempt sending a copy to Takeuchi. I bet he wouldn't resist the urge (this is comedy gold, you could spin a full narrative out of it) and ask the Mushroom to add "Keeper" to the roster! She'd be worth five stars in GO, at the very least. :-)
Kill Your Sister
Base Stats & Skills
Lore & Character
Noble Phantasms
The Maw of Extermination (+ Extra Materials)
Last edited by Daneel Rush; October 4th, 2017 at 02:37 PM.
Servant Rider:
True Name: Elijah 'The Blazing Prophet'
Alignment: Lawful Good
Alternate Classes: Caster, Ruler
Strength- D
Agility- C
Endurance- C+
Mana- B
Luck- A
NP- A++
Appearance:
Personality: Rider gives the impression of a zealous and faithful man, ablaze with passion for the Lord. He is compassionate for the plight of the weak, and opposes tyrants who rest indolently on their thrones while the masses suffer. Though this is a genuine aspect of Rider's personality, it is by no means a complete picture of him. Rider can also be deeply obstinate and even downright self-righteous, lambasting those around him as fools and hypocrites while believing himself to be the last "true" Israelite. At times, so deeply was Rider committed to these beliefs that even the words of God Himself fell on deaf ears, demanding repeated efforts to rouse him from his languor.
Rider's relationship with his Master is one of mentorship, as he refuses to subject himself before any authority other than the Lord. One of the few people to truly break through the prophet's veil of pious indifference was his pupil and eventual successor Elisha. While at first Rider regarded the impetuous youth dogging his path to be a mere annoyance, eventually he grew impressed by Elisha's earnest diligence and faith in God. Over time, he even came to cherish the boy much as one would a beloved younger brother.
When the time came to annoint Elisha as his successor, Rider was beyond proud of his one and only pupil, the sole person he trusted to pass on his legacy. Simply to know the boy he helped train would someday grow up into a miracle-worker even greater than himself is truly something that makes Rider feel pride from the bottom of his heart.
Likes: solitude, rain, ravens, Elisha
Dislikes: tyrants, ravenous women, his own wavering heart
Talents: striking fear into inequity, "trial by fire"
Natural Enemy: Jezebel
Class Skills:
Riding- A+
Ability to ride animals. At this rank, Phantasmal and Divine Beasts can be ridden at a high degree of skill, but not those of the Dragon-Kind. While Rider was never famous for utilizing mounts in his life, the anecdote of being brought up to heaven on a divinely pulled chariot has garnered him a high rank in this Skill.
Magic Resistance- A(-)
Confers protection against magical effects. All spells below A-rank are cancelled outright. With this level of defense against sorcery, it would be scarcely an exaggeration to term the Servant a "Magus Killer".
In his career as a prophet Rider encountered great opposition from the priests of Ba'al, who called upon the fullest might of their heretical gods in an attempt to bring about his ruin. Nonetheless Rider's faith in Yahweh remained resolute, an impregnable shield against the magic of the unholy.
However, as this Skill derives its power from Rider's immense piety, its efficacy declines if his faith falters or against sacraments originating from his own religion.
Personal Skills:
Revelation- A(-)
A Skill to "hear the voice of the heavens" and take optimum action. Equivalent to Instinct; a sixth sense regarding battles, but Revelation accomodates all matters related to the achievement of a goal, such as taking the swiftest path while travelling. Because of its inherently irrational nature, it cannot be clearly explained to others, or so says Rider.
Rider received numerous prophecies from Yahweh concerning the fate of Ahab's kingdom that spurred the prophet (oftentimes reluctantly) into action. In one of his story's most famous anecdotes, Rider retreated to Mount Horeb after the Pagan queen Jezebel put out an order for his capture and execution. Fearful for his life and despairing of the seeming futility of his efforts, Rider's faith wavered and he sequestered himself in the wilderness, cursing the people of Israel for their infidelity to God.
It was then that Rider received three great demonstrations of divine power- a mighty earthquake, a roaring inferno and a raging squall. However, God's true presence showed itself not in those grand displays of sound and fury but a gentle, quiet voice- so soft it could be mistaken for a whispering of the wind. Thus Rider realized that the presence of God would always be with him, no matter the adversity he faced or the strength of his worldly foes.
Faltering Faith- B
A Skill for those whose devotion waxed and waned in times of peril and inner strife. While his faith is at its peak this Skill serves to grant Rider Protection Of The Faith at the same rank, but when his devotion falters he suffers a - modifier to Revelation, Magic Resistance and Incitement.
Though Rider was a devouted prophet, he at times despaired at the obstinance of Israel's people and the apparent futility of turning them back to the right path. Were it not for the patient grace of God to console Rider in his lowest moments, he may very well have forsaken his duty as a prophet altogether.
The torch of Rider's faith may have flickered and waned, but the fire burning in his soul was never once truly extinguished.
Breath Of The Dragon (False)- C+
The ability to release a torrent of Mana akin to the breath of a dragon, the strongest of the Phantasmal Races. Rider can concentrate fiery Mana into his throat and expel it as a powerful stream of flames. This fire also possesses holy attributes, burning hotter against the demonic and apostate.
Rider's possession of this Skill is not a result of any draconic ancestry. Instead, it expresses how his words were said to blaze like a torch, as well as the theory identifying him with one of the two witnesses in the Book Of Revelation, for whom it was prophesied that fire would spring from their mouths to devour their foes.
Familiars (Ravens)- A+
Ability to utilize familiars. In Rider's case, his familiars take the form of large jet-black ravens that he can call upon. They can be sent to scout out terrain, retrieve items for Rider, or even to spy on enemies- since he can peer through their eyes at will like a scrying lens. While they can also be brought to bear in combat- diving down upon Rider's foes and scourging them with their beak and claws- offensively they are little more than ordinary ravens able to accomplish seldom more than momentarily distracting a fellow Heroic Spirit.
This Skill is a crystallization of the anecdote where Rider- fleeing the wrath of the tyrannical king Ahab- was instructed by God to hide away at the river Corinth. For the many days that Rider secluded himself, God sent forth his aid in the form of ravens to bring bread and water to the persecuted prophet.
The ability to call upon ravens to his aid would qualify as a Noble Phantasm were he to be summoned as Caster, with their prowess greatly raised to that of formidable Divine Beasts.
Incitement- B(-)
A Skill that serves as the acquisition of words and gestures to lead the citizens and the masses. Especially when employed against an individual, it functions as a sort of mental attack. Rider's words of burning zeal can strike fear into the guilty and rouse the heart of an entire nation that has forsaken God.
Against the impious, Rider's preaching approximates a mental attack- imposing the full weight of their sins upon the target's psyche. Contrarily, the righteous will find themselves enflamed and invigorated by his fiery sermons, filled with a newfound resolve to fight for the Lord's cause.
Noble Phantasms:
Elohim Adonai- Proof Of The True Lord (B, Anti-Pagan): A Noble Phantasm representing the trial Rider put forth to adjudicate the true God of Israel. He called upon the wicked priests of Ba'al to Mount Carmel and laid out twin altars, one to Yahweh and the other for the Pagan god Ba'al. Before a vast crowd of Israelites, Rider declared the terms of his challenge- both sides would invoke their god to bring down fire and consume the respective offering laid out upon the altars. The one God to answer the call would thereafter be annointed as the true Lord of Israel, while the impostor would be revealed as but a mere idol unworthy of worship.
The contest began and the heathen priests immediately set about their frenzied rituals, dancing madly and even shedding blood upon the altar in an attempt to arouse their dark god. But no matter how hard they cried out or how wildly they danced, Ba'al remained silent.
Rider then knelt down before his own altar and uttered a simple prayer to Yahweh. Moments later a great inferno descended from the heavens, a pillar of flame that engulfed his altar and the sacrifice laid out upon it, consuming both utterly to leave not even a single stone remaining. Awed by this show of divine power, the people of Israel broke free of their idolatrous spell and finally turned their backs on the corrupt priests of Ba'al, slaughtering them to the last.
This anecdote has been sublimated into a Noble Phantasm, showing the impotence of Pagan gods before the power of the true Lord. Invoking its name with a prayer to Yahweh, the skies open up above the opponent as a great column of fire descends down from the heavens to engulf them and the surrounding area, leaving only a smoldering crater. As destructive as this attack is, the physical form of these flames is no more then a formality, for the true power of this Noble Phantasm lies in enacting the concept of "Divine Resolution".
Whether the opponent evades the pillar or not, in the aftermath of this Noble Phantasm's invocation all mysteries deriving power from the Pagan religions (i.e anything other then the Judeo-Christian foundation) are greatly suppressed or even sealed outright. Skills and Noble Phantasms empowered by Pagan gods are sealed at rank B or lower, while those possessing a greater mystery than Elohim Adonai itself are merely degraded by two full rankings.
A powerful Noble Phantasm against Rider's Pagan enemies, their so-called divine power burnt away like wastepaper before the flames of Yahweh.
However, invoking this Noble Phantasm successfully requires a contested "divinity check" between Rider and his Pagan foes, mirroring the trial he put before the priests of Ba'al. It will fail to activate should they possess a ranking in Divinity or related Skills such as Protection Of The Faith or Revelation higher than Rider himself. It must also be noted that all of Rider's own religious-based Skills count as one rank lower than they should be while the latter half of his Faltering Faith Skill is active, meaning that invoking this Noble Phantasm under those circumstances is a rather tricky proposition.
Shamayim Alah- Blazing Empyrean Ascension (A++, Anti-Fortress/Suicide-Attack): Rider's greatest Noble Phantasm, reflecting how he was taken up to heaven on a fiery chariot rather than dying as a mortal. The prophet's final miracle that far surpassed in death any he performed in life, like a candle that blazes brightest before being extinguished.
Upon invoking its name, a fiery whirlwind envelops Rider and obscures him from sight before condensing around him into the form of a majestic chariot and accompanying horses, all of which are comprised entirely of roiling flames. The twin steeds pulling the chariot's reins are each peerless Divine Beasts, emissaries of Yahweh appointed for the sole purpose of guiding His beloved prophet.
The horses spring to life, spurring the chariot forth in an unstoppable ramming charge. The might of its passage is unmatched on this earth, incinerating all in the chariot's path with otherworldly flames rivalling the heat of the sun and scattering the ashes behind in tornado-force gales. With its full power brought to bear, this Noble Phantasm is more than capable of disintigrating an entire fortress in a single almighty attack. The chariot is not constrained to travelling merely over land either, as the Divine Beasts pulling it can trample through the skies just as easily as the earth.
However, the fire chariot stokes itself by consuming Rider's own magical energy as kindling. As the charge continues, Rider's spiritual body begins to rapidly lose cohesion, dissolving apart and becoming indistinguishable from the flames of his Noble Phantasm. Eventually this Noble Phantasm ushers forth one last burst of ramming power- seeming to blaze with the radiance of a dying galaxy- before the entire construct, chariot, horses, Rider and all flicker out of existence.
A self-sacrificial Noble Phantasm that forfeits its owner's life upon invocation. While Rider can control the passage his chariot takes, once engaged it is utterly impossible for him to dismount or halt its advancement by any means, forced to continue riding forth until his life is inevitably burnt away to nothingness. Even the authority of a Command Seal proves impotent in ceasing the unstoppable charge of this Noble Phantasm.
As such, despite its immense power it is obviously a forbidden trump card to only be used as a last resort.
Eliyahu Nadderath- Passing On The Prophet's Mantle (C, Support): Rider's magnificent red cloak, synonymous with his career as a prophet. Upon his ascension to heaven, Rider tossed it down to his young pupil Elisha to annoint him as his successor. Elisha then used the gift for his first miracle- parting the river Jorden by striking the cloth against the waters- before going on to work far more miracles than Elijah ever did, proving himself as a more than worthy successor to the great prophet.
This act symbolized a passing down from elder to child, a rite of succession by which the younger generation surpasses the older. Such is the nature of Rider's Noble Phantasm, embodying both the end of his own legend and the beginning of another's.
This Noble Phantasm takes form as the simple, yet illustrous red cloak that Rider wears. Rather than a mundane garment it is in fact woven entirely out of a material akin to synthetic Magic Circuits, imprinted with a record of each and every miracle the prophet accomplished over his life. One to gain possession of this cloth can access the entire "archive" at will, either reenacting Rider's miracles directly or simply using the immense volume of thaumaturgic knowledge stored within to further their own spellcraft. Furthermore, the mantle seethes with a layer of divine magical energy that rebukes all external spells, granting the wearer Magic Resistance at rank A.
A powerful Noble Phantasm, but one wholly redundant in Rider's own hands. Its true powers and worth are only visible upon passing it down to another. A completely ordinary human with no magical aptitude could become a mid-tier Magus through its power, while an already advanced Magus might reach heights rivalling a Caster Class Heroic Spirit. Of course, given Rider's personality it isn't as if he'll pass it on to just anyone. Only to one he deems a rightful successor- with a just heart and faith in God- will Rider even consider granting this Noble Phantasm, and only then after an extensive mentorship to test their mettle.
Unlike most Noble Phantasms that fade away after the Servant perishes, this cloak will remain intact in the world indefinitely in Rider's absense. Obviously something meant to be given out to another would be worthless if it vanished along with the original owner...
Key Words/ Craft Essence
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So, after contemplating it for quite a while I've finally written up a remake of my old Elijah Servant from where back when. Have to say, I'm pretty much a zillion times more satisfied with this guy than my original version, so I suppose it only goes to show how much better at Servant crafting I've gotten. As always, be sure to drop by with comments and criticisms! Thanks.
Last edited by RoydGolden; December 1st, 2018 at 12:25 AM.
Elijah: This is very well-written; I have to say, your tendency to mix Lore and Skills together is what makes reading them engaging. Maybe I should give that format a try...
The Shamayim Alah NP: A good Suicide Attack NP, which you creatively made given how Elijah went out. One can say he went out in a blaze of glory...(sorry)
The Eliyahu Nadderath NP: Oh my god, a Magic Crest cloak. This is a really creative take on what was simply a mundane object, so props for that.
On how I mix lore and Skills together... If I didn't do that I'd be left with hardly any lore at all, since I find writing History sections a pain most of the time . And I'm glad you liked the cloak NP. I certainly tried to go with a more unusual take on the concept of 'taking up the prophet's mantle'. If you're interested I actually first came up with the NP for my Elisha sheet, though frankly I think the effects are a little better described this time around.
Ali Don, since I remember you've made a Bran the Blessed sheet, I wonder what's his reaction to Efnisien if he was summoned...
"It's alright, my husband. I'm not angry with you, honestly. I'll wait...for however long it takes."Source: https://twitter.com/BUNBUN922/status/810106514388254720
Class: Ruler
Alternate Classes: N/A
Alignment: True Neutral
Origin: Historic Myth
Region: Ireland
Epithet: Erin’s Fairest Maiden
Parameters
Strength: E
Endurance: E
Agility: E
Mana: B
Luck: D
NP: EX
Height/Weight: 5’3”/110lbs
Gender: Female
Likes: Cu Chulainn, Ulster, needlework
Dislikes: Conflict, cheaters, people obsessed with disliking things
Talents: Best wife
Natural enemy: Fand(?)
Class Skills:
God’s Resolution: (C)
God's Resolution is a Class Skill of the Ruler class and is the privilege of the Ruler presiding over the Holy Grail War. Each Ruler is normally granted two Command Spells for each Servant that participates in the Holy Grail War.
Receives two Command Spells per Servant as normal for others of her Class. However, due to her personality this skill isn’t as high as it should be for some reason.
Magic Resistance: (C)
Magic Resistance grants protection against magical effects. Differing from the Resistance effect that merely rejects Magical Energy, this ability cancels the spells altogether.
Unskilled in magecraft and only sparsely encountering it throughout her life, Ruler is saved from being completely subjected to the effects of magic due to her Class container and trace amounts of druidic blood in her lineage.
Cancel spells with a chant below two verses. Cannot defend against magecraft on the level of High-Thaumaturgy and Greater Rituals.
True Name Discernment: (A)
True Name Discernment is a Class Skill of the Ruler class where status information such as one's identity, Skills and Parameters are automatically revealed to the owner of this Skill when directly encountering a Servant.
Possessing a higher degree of this Skill than other Rulers, Ruler’s ability to innately sense the identities and intentions of even those wishing to remain anonymous border on the supernatural; perhaps fitting then to demonstrate her prowess through a Class Skill. A major part of her story is guessing the identity of her husband’s son with his previous wife, having never met him nor even been made aware of what he looked like.
Personal Skills:
Six Gifts of Womanhood: (A)
A skill encompassing one’s completeness as a woman. Though women may be many things; from warriors to concubines, it falls to them that they master the inherent gifts turned expectations of their sex. A series of genetic predispositions that few women achieve completely, it is truly a Skill that marks a “golden state” in terms of the personality of the possessor. The six gifts are stated to be beauty, a gentle voice, sweet words, wisdom, skill at needlework, and chastity.
It isn’t clear how Ruler came to possess these gifts, other than a combination of her birth and stately training. Since the state of supreme womanhood is treated as an area in which she has [authority] over, Ruler may employ all six Skills relevant to Six Gifts as sub-type Skills similar to Imperial Privilege. The Skills that Six Gifts of Womanhood contains are Golden Rule (Body), Alluring Nightingale, Incitement, Item Creation (Needlework), Princess of Loveliness, and Clairvoyance.
Ruler’s ability to call on said Skills is easier and more fluid than other Skills of the same type in part because of their natural state residing in her already, and as a counter to her abysmal status as a Servant.
Noble Phantasm
Lore
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Didn't realize I was sniped. Bran would most likely get as pissed off as his Guts faceclaim. Berserker Bran would be terrifying.
You don't fuck with a dude's sister like that.
Last edited by Ail Don; April 4th, 2017 at 03:32 PM.
i don't actually remember her doing anything at all besides getting plowed
doesn't mean it didn't happen in the myths. just saying i don't remember it
Read the Wooing of Emer and the Wasting Sickness of Cuchailann
From what little I know of the Ulster Cycle, her role is basically limited to flirting with Cu and having great tits.
That said, this is a very well thought-out sheet as per usual for you Ail, even if I have no idea where you're getting most of this lore from. The NPs are all creative interpretations of what must've been a rather sparse legend. The first one is perfect for a Ruler in that she can basically "time out" people who go against the Grail War's rules, while for the second one I like that you went with something more interesting then simple memory erasure.
Giving her a version of Gae Bolg as a memento to Cu also works, and the reference to her sadness while wielding it is a fittingly bittersweet touch. Ridiculously cute FC too. Best waifu 10/10, would summon anytime.