Create-A-Servant 2

[Bird of Hermes]

Do you know where the Krishna sheet is? I haven't been able to find one on this site for some reason.

It was off site

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hmm when is the OP gonna get updated case there were some really and sheets i deleted on this, and they still show up on the OP.

Continually asking for it doesn’t help.

[the god of world-0]

Medb Lily: Doesn't work for me

what? why? i thought that i had a cool concept.

[RoydGolden]

what? why? i thought that i had a cool concept.

The concept and personality are fun, but I'm not crazy over her NP being a pretty generic Avalon copy. Surely something more interesting could be done with the "realm of the faeries" idea.

[the god of world-0]

oh, this, thats ok i not all that crazy over the NP either, but i could not find a better effect realy.

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negative feedback is fine, but please tell what you did not like só i can try to improve on my next sheets

[RoydGolden]

oh, this, thats ok i not all that crazy over the NP either, but i could not find a better effect realy.

Something to do with Marble Phantasm could work, since it's said to be an inherent ability of faeries. Still a little generic, but at least not ripping off Arturia.

[Bird of Hermes]

Marble Phantasm's are more True Ancestor territory. It would a very big stretch.

[RoydGolden]

Marble Phantasm's are more True Ancestor territory. It would a very big stretch.

Description on the (admittedly unreliable) wiki says it's an ability of True Ancestors and Elementals (i.e faeries). So I think it could work.

[34]

Well, TA is a kind of Elemental

[Crying]

Gregor Samsa: Not a Servant you'd ever actually want to summon, but one that might make for an interesting story. I feel like you probably could've fused the effects of the his NP into his Skills and left him as an NP-less Servant, justified by the fact that he's a 'false existance' like Sasaki. That's what I would've done, anyway, but I never would've thought of making a sheet for this character, so good job anyway.

Medb Lily: Fun idea, but I feel like the execution is a little lacking. Maybe its just the messy formatting, though? Anway, I agree with Royd when they said that her NP just being a copy of Avalon is a little boring - it makes sense, but its still a bit of a let down. Maybe you could do something with the idea that its 'a reality marble representing her delusion of being a queen of faeries'? Or maybe you could have it be an 'internal reality marble connected to Avalon' which lets her absorb mana from Avalon/the Reverse Side of the World?

Nimrod: Faceclaim doesn't work for me - as in I literally can't see it. Anyway, speaking as someone whose done two different interpretations of Nimrod before, I feel like this sheet is a little... boring? I dunno, maybe try to look into the Nasuverse lore concerning the Tower of Babel to get some ideas of what he should be like?

On an unrelated note, I'm kind of surprised that a sheet for Shirou from Arashi's I Am Not There "fic" has never been done. There's definitely potential there and it would probably be very different than EMIYA.

[asterism42]

Is Samsa fake? Jekyll, Dantes, and Holmes aren't.

[SleepMode]

Is Samsa fake? Jekyll, Dantes, and Holmes aren't.

On the other hand, Yan Qing is specifically stated to be a complete literary existence.

[the god of world-0]

i wonder what a best formating would be, i have been wondering how should i change my sheets

[RoydGolden]

i wonder what a best formating would be, i have been wondering how should i change my sheets

For one thing, you should separate Class and Personal Skills. Lumping them together is just needlessly confusing.

[Crying]

Is Samsa fake? Jekyll, Dantes, and Holmes aren't.

Samsa is specifically acknowledged as being the character from a novel thought to be semi-autobiographical. Not 'the person who served as inspiration for Samsa' but literally the character from the novel who is suspiciously similar to Kafka, the author. His personality exists the way it does due to the fact that 'the reader's desired him to be that way'. He seems to be a pretty fake existance to me.

Dante and Holmes both come from GO, which is rather loose with Servant rules. Can't say much about Jekyll or Frankie, the only other fictional Heroic Spirit that doesn't come from GO (as far as I can remember, anyway). Anyway, I made my suggestion because he's specified as being a work of fiction in the sheet itself, I don't actually have a problem with non-mythical fictional characters being treated as real in the Nasuverse.

[asterism42]

Holmes is deliberately ambiguous about whether or not he was a real person.

[You]

Holmes is deliberately ambiguous about whether or not he was a real person.

What about how he's in the short story with helena?

[asterism42]

Maybe she's fictional too

Maybe Holmes is breaking the fourth wall, acknowledging that all TM characters are works of fiction.

[the god of world-0]

maybe we are all fictional too...

[the god of world-0]

"master, even if i am useless, will you protect me? if you will, then i will protect you to! i'll dismember anyone who tries to hurt you!"

Class: Assassin
Aligiment: Chaotic/good
region: France/japan
Height: 138cm
Weight: 33kg
Likes: sweets, open spaces, gentle people
Dislikes: agresive people, small spaces, alchohol
Talents: waiting
Armaments: blood-stained kitching knife
Natural enemies: Ayaka sajyou

stats:

Str: E
End: E
Agi: C
Mna: A
Lck: E
NP: A

Skills

class skills
Presence concealment(E++):it is extremily dificult to hide as a side effect her red hood,if the hood is removed this skill will rank up, but not by much.

personal skills
Animal dialogue(A+): all animals will follow her orders even some phantasmal beasts, it is even more eficient in canines.

looks of pitifulness(A): her aperance give of a very pitiful aura, making people be sorry for her and, by extension, reluctant to attack her. In case of "evil" aligment, a luck check is made.

happy ending(A): a unusual skill that takes so every set number of misfortunated heppenings, her luck stats will changet to EX-rank for a brief period of time. More likely to activate in life-or-death situatiations

Noble phantasm

Simbol of evil, Archetype-villan

The Wolf

rank: anti-army, B+
Assassins main way of combat, this noble phantasm summons the fears of children around the world crystallized in the format of a hellish looking giant wolf.
the animal has the side of a small car, its fur is pitch black and its eyes are deep red, there is also a glowing orange mark on its forehead that resembles a command seal.
the thing is classified as a magical best and is strong enough to fight most servants on equal foot, it has the skills magic resistence(A), monstrous strenght(B) and Aptitude for slaughter(kids)(B), it also has the ability to capture enemies into its stomach, with the maximun of two.

would you push the button, please?

The Hallway

rank: anti-reallity(self), A
This noble phantasms do not come from the original story, but was born from the urban legend of the "Little red riding hood of semina apartments". It turn Assassin into a illusion of sorts, a hallucination, making it impossible to harm her as all attack will phase through her body. she herself is also unable to do harm in this form, but she will give of a aura of terror that can only be blocked with mental protection skills of rank A or higher.

Background

Assassin's goes by the identity of Little red riding hood, while one of the most know caracters of literature, there was no real little red ridding hood, so the grail tries summon the closest thing possible.
this girl was summon because of her conections with a urban legend rapidly rising in popularity, "the little red ridding hood of semina apartments". in the story, an unnamed person ignores the cries for help of a little girl who ends up being killed by her abused mother, the person is the haunted by the ghost of the child.
The kitching knife Assassin wields is the same knife her mom used to kill her and her abusive father and then comit suicide.

personality

Assassin is a very sweet kid. she is very shy around unknow people but it does not take a lot of effort to make her open up, just being gentle is enough. she does not jugde based on looks and can get along very well even with beings of monstrous apparence.
however her innocence has a dark side. Assassin is very protective of people she gets attached to. even using a more agressive tone of voice against her friends may be enough for her to cause fisical harm to someone, and she does not see fault in killing or torturing for the sake of "protecting". she is also unforgiven, and if you do something that she sees as bad, even if you manage to regain her favor, things will never be the same.

craft essence

Person A

it hurts, onee-chan...

please, open the door, onee-chan...

please...

why won't you open the door, onee-chan...

i thought you are a good person...

i thought you are my friend, onee-chan...

please, onee-chan...

i...

i hate you, onee-chan...

[34]

Little Red Riding Hood: This formatting is much better than your previous ones, that's for sure. As for the sheet itself, it's pretty interesting. Looks of Pitifulness fits nicely with the theme, tho I'm can't say the same about her 3rd Skill. Also, her 2nd NP's effect is a bit too underwhelming for an A rank NP.