--- Vivienne Bianchi
Date: 10.09.1994 (SAT)
Location:
Owl's Nest, Prushka's Room (?)
Phase: Morning Phase
Weather: Overcast --- |
https://i.imgur.com/jHjfAhq.png |
Vivienne had been called many things, but this was the first time that someone had called her scary. It got her thinking once more for a bit, as she paused, likely trying to figure out the ways she could inspire fear in someone's heart. One could posit that acting doll-like and being transfixed in a blank state all the time could be quite eerie for some. No warm smiles, no signs of life, yes... the more squeamish and easily disturbed people could actually find such a behavior scary. She had never really thought about it this way.
"Me... scary? Sorry..."
Then there was the matter of Prushka essentially asking for Vivienne's cooperation. To cooperate while hiding each and other's true nature, wasn't the person talking about humans acting pretty human-like herself? But then, she hadn't proclaimed to be that different from them either, she only spoke figuratively, as if she was different.
"I want to know... but we will have to see... for now... we should finish what we first came to Owl's Nest for. Maybe... we are too late for Alex..."
Had she really given up? Or was this simply being realistic about the situation? Once more, to go look for traces of someone that was so secretive, in the foreboding forest... after so much time had already passed... what trace was there to be found?
"Maybe... would be more stubborn... if I could feel... but I cannot. So I move on. I look at at things that I can do, not at what is uncertain."
To move on, and not linger onto the past. When one is devoid of feelings, this does indeed become a lot easier to do, to not be shackled by what was once -- but the two of them knew that there was one shackle that tied Vivienne to the past, and it was what she once had. Indeed, Vivienne suddenly veered off into a recollection of sorts, as if the hypothetical passing of Alex Terrot had spurred a memory of hers. She recited it not with wistful eyes however, but her signature blank, empty visage.
"I remember... distant memory... of me crying when my dog died... I was young... it was painful. We buried him in backyard. Every morning... I talked to him, at his grave. Picked a flower and put it there. Then, when I was filming a sad scene in movies... when director told me to cry... I needed to do was remember him, and all the happy times we spent together, and how he was gone forever. Maybe I was scared too, that some day what happened to him would happen to Papa and Mama.
Maybe to me too.
But now I am 'free'. It doesn't hurt, but somehow it hurts in another way.
Still... I move. I do things... and move on, never stopping. Either until I cannot move anymore, or... or when I can stop myself again, when I regain what I gave away."
So she gave it away, her emotions. A little piece of information for Prushka. And now she walks, walks, and walks a certain path. She goes through the journey, unfeeling, unstopping, till either her travels are brought to an abrupt end, or she can stop herself once again... for in the end... is this a journey not to a place, but a journey to end her journey?
A strange concept.
In the end, even after she gave this tidbit of information to Prushka...
... what leads to trust?
Can there be trust without appreciation, without friendship, without compassion?
Was there an absolute lack of all of this in the first place? Many had told her, that once they got used to the empty, cold exterior, there was a glimmer of something warm and alive within Vivienne Bianchi's heart.
What kind of life had Vivienne lead up to this point? How familiar was she with the turnside? Was her current condition something of her own doing, or was it imposed upon her by circumstances beyond her control? None of this was known to Prushka, but even then, she seemed to be asking for 'trust' between the two of them.
That they had slept in the same room, that Prushka had willingly used her money to not only buy Vivienne some coffee, but also to pay for the lodging. The optimist would view this as good-will, the natural state of someone just wanting to help others -- in contrast, a pessimist would simply say that this was a way to set up a 'debt', so that the favor Vivienne owed Prushka would be repaid later... but in what light did Vivienne Bianchi see all this?
Typically, no one really knew, not even Vivienne herself.
However, there was a debt that was left unsettled right now, and one that the two of them may want to focus their attention on -- it was after all part of the deal that they had made with a certain Rachel Halloway... though why no one just ran up and check up on them after Prushka's scream was something else.
"... we go help Rachel make breakfast? Somehow... no one heard you scream..."
Or perhaps people did, and ran to call the police. Who knew what was going on after the tense discovery from yesterday...
... Vivienne eyed the room's door.