Page 340 of 340 FirstFirst ... 240290330335338339340
Results 6,781 to 6,797 of 6797

Thread: The Grail Works Mission Dossier (Discussion & Ideas)

  1. #6781
    吸血鬼 Vampire
    Join Date
    Mar 2019
    Age
    28
    Posts
    248
    This is the second to last chapter, before we have the Konosuba snippet happen, and more plot starts up as a result.
    I still have no idea how that's going to happen or why, so that's definitely interesting. I suppose that's part of the "legendary engineers" hunt, which implies... that guy who made the Destroyer, in Konosuba? That seems like an excellent way for things to go horribly wrong.

    Considering Wolfen flies, I'm surprised she has a keel. It seems unnecessary, design-wise, though it works as a structurally significant part, though. Kongou being fairly savvy in her political dealings, which I guess counterbalances Wolfen's... lack of subtlety. Emperor is a less-symbolic position here than in modern Japan?

  2. #6782
    死徒 Dead Apostle RanmaBushiko's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Near Seattle
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    730
    US Friend Code
    691,985,459
    Blog Entries
    10
    Quote Originally Posted by Arbitrarity View Post
    I still have no idea how that's going to happen or why, so that's definitely interesting. I suppose that's part of the "legendary engineers" hunt, which implies... that guy who made the Destroyer, in Konosuba? That seems like an excellent way for things to go horribly wrong.

    Considering Wolfen flies, I'm surprised she has a keel. It seems unnecessary, design-wise, though it works as a structurally significant part, though. Kongou being fairly savvy in her political dealings, which I guess counterbalances Wolfen's... lack of subtlety. Emperor is a less-symbolic position here than in modern Japan?
    Suffice to say, things are going to get interesting. *chuckles* Oh so very interesting...

    As for Wolfen's Keel? She was literally built around a slab of flying metal that Wayland Smith designed for Erik to serve as the bottom of the ship, or base of the ship. A lot of her ship was simply built around holding it in place, because it kept trying to fly up and away while he was building on it, until he got rather pissed, and designed an entirely new way of handling things like that. Considering she doesn't exactly have Erik helping point out where she's going wrong, she needs someone that can.

    Kongou is politically savvy, because someone has to be around that base. Even if Ooyodo will try to shoehorn herself into that role later, as well as Yamato.

    As for the Emperor, it's less "less-symbolic" and more "so many politicians are dead, he's actually been put back in power". Well, at least until they can get enough politicians for him to transfer power back over, again. As you might be able to tell from those news reports Wolfen looked over, at the end? The initial Abyssal assault was a month long clusterfuck of the highest order, and it's barely been enough time for nations to start summoning shipgirls of their own. We're at the very beginning of seeing proper shipgirl fleets arise, right now, much less canon or semi-canon ships that could help.

    Can you tell world building is hard when you've only got a few sources for it?
    I'm starting to suspect that talking with Kieran influences my rolls on Fate/Grand Order Heavily. How else can you explain me talking with him, then rolling for 30, only to get 3 Archer of Shinjuku on my second ten roll?

    I write like Douglas Adams. Proof: http://iwl.me/s/696f37bd

  3. #6783
    死徒 Dead Apostle RanmaBushiko's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Near Seattle
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    730
    US Friend Code
    691,985,459
    Blog Entries
    10
    Chapter 8: Departures and Investigations, Planning and Politics



    Wolfen snaps her eyes open, to a bright light, only to blink quietly.

    “Good MORNING, Dess! Time to wake up and get some food!” Kongou cheerily cries out, as she brings out food for everyone.

    “You’re awfully chipper for… what IS the day, anyways?” Wolfen pauses, trying to think it over.

    “Oh? February 28th. Forgot to check the time?” Kongou asks, before stuffing a scone in Wolfen’s mouth, grinning.

    Wolfen gives out a muffled “Grmph!” before chewing. A long “Mmm…” follows, with a smile on Wolfen’s face as a result of Kongou’s cooking, followed by a thumbs up.

    “Hoppou thinks Wolfen’s almost better!” Hoppou chips in with a smile. “That’ll be nice. Hoppou’s been missing the others.”

    Kongou nods, quietly, a smile on her face as the young Abyssals near her enjoy the food that she prepared for all of them. “It’ll be nice to have Wolfen fully recovered, won’t it?” Kongou asks, smiling more. “Still, any suggestions on what I should look for?”

    “Divine realm entrances.” Wolfen admits, as she finishes her scone, before stretching. “If I’m close enough, I should be able to find one. But I’ll freely admit, I wasn’t exactly built to sense them. So if there’s any legend or lore about divine realms, to anywhere? I can probably break through into others, and it’s not like much can affect me on a spiritual level.” She adds, before sighing. “Though, I’ve got a plan for the next few days to help all of us, if you don’t mind.”

    Hoppou, Kongou, and the young Abyssals blink, almost in unison. Wolfen smiles a bit at the obvious curiosity, before speaking up once more. “Most of my Legion of Coal have the ability to tell what’s underground below. I’d like to check the other Aleutian Islands for a decent supply of iron, or other metals using them, then try to set up a refinery and base for everyone before I take off with Hoppou and yourself, Kongou.”

    Hoppou smiles widely. “That really would help a lot, wouldn’t it? It’ll help all of Hoppou’s snuggly children.” Hoppou pauses for a moment, finger to her lips. “Should Hoppou call her children and creations ‘Snugglies’? They’re all so fun to cuddle with, after all!”

    The dogpile of young Abyssals is her answer, as a horde of children pounce their mother, much like cats or kittens, for hugs and snuggles with her.

    “Awwww.” Twin squeals erupt from Wolfen and Kongou, as they behold the eldritch adorableness.

    “So, while they’re having fun cuddling with Hoppou, shall we go and check the other islands, Wolfen?” Kongou asks in a faux-whisper. “After we’re done, we can have some tea and relax again!”

    Wolfen nods, before heading towards the door with Kongou on her heels, a wide smile on her face as she waves goodbye to Hoppou and her little ones.

    For a long moment, they just stand in the sun, as Wolfen leans against the building on the outside.. “Mmm. I honestly worry that I busted something when I took both of those enemies down, to be honest with you, Kongou.”

    “I wondered. What does it feel like?” Kongou asks, quietly, all teasing and silliness gone.

    “Empty. I’m eating the proper amount of food. I’ve been having the wasabi paste you brought me. I’ve had some steel mixed into my diet. But it still feels like I’m missing something important.” Wolfen admits.

    “Fuel perhaps? Oil? You may have used up too much, and if you’re low, you might need to refuel on that.” Kongou queries, thinking.

    “It feels emptier than that, but perhaps that may help?” Wolfen muses, before walking to the sand and launching.

    “We’ll be sure to look for a source then, Dess!” Kongou cheers, as they leave.

    You know?” Mordred’s voice speaks up, as Kongou jumps with a yelp. “Perhaps it’s a lack of Legend, Wolfen?

    “Oh, right, you added functionality to my drones so I could hear you contact me in private, Mordred. That scared me!” Kongou admits, with a sigh. Then she pauses, obviously thinking. “Then it might be you’re starving for power in a more legendary sense. Perhaps some item hunting would be good for you?”

    Wolfen slowly nods. “Hopefully it’s oil, I’ll admit. But if it isn’t, then I’ll be on the lookout for things like that.”

    “Right! Izumo Province!” Kongou snaps her fingers. “That’s where legends of a way to Yomi is hidden at!”

    Wolfen nods, thinking for a while, before smiling softly.




    3 Hours Later




    “Ugh. Stupid crazy whale.” Kongou grumbles, wiping whale blubber off herself in a vain attempt to get it off. “Why couldn’t it just leave us alone?!

    “Orcas eat seals. Perhaps it thought we were something similar?” Wolfen asks, grumbling, before pulling in as much whale blubber as she can, to get processed into whale oil.

    “Oh, right. Whale oil. Good thinking, I suppose!” Kongou admits, before sighing and helping. “Still, that stupid whale should have just not tried to eat us, you know? I love to look at them, not be eaten by them. That’s not anything I want to go near!”

    Wolfen nods emphatically in agreement. “Total agreement, wholeheartedly. I never want to experience this again.”

    At least my suggestions for whale cutlets are good, right?” Mordred pips in with a smirk on her face, from her comfortable position in her captain’s chair. “Also, the captain’s uniform isn’t disappearing anymore. But on the topic of power, the Legion of Coal randomly all run out of power now. Not sure what’s up with that.

    A frown covers both Wolfen and Kongou’s face at that. “That’s… concerning. Let’s get most of the crew on that whale oil conversion, ASAP Mordred.”

    Already on it! I’ll be focusing on that so nothing goes wrong, though. So if you’ll excuse me, later, Kongou!” Mordred’s voice trails off.

    “At least your captain’s polite for a genderswapped boy.” Kongou admits, wryly. “Still nothing like what I thought the only child of King Arthur would be at, but he’s pretty nice, isn’t he?”

    Wolfen nods with a smile. “Mordred’s quite nice. I suspect quite snuggly, as well, though it doesn’t look like I’ll ever get the chance to test that out.”

    “Though, if I remember my history correctly, would Morgana have raised Mordred to be a boy, and simply used spells to ensure she saw the wrong body parts until a certain age?” Kongou muses to herself, quietly. “After all, only boys could become squires, right?”

    Wolfen frowns, as they make landfall on a stony outcropping of island. “I’m not sure. We’ll probably never know, to be honest. But since Mordred sees himself as male, irregardless of body, I’m going to respect that.”

    “Fair enough!” Kongou chirps, then stretches as she lands as well. “Now, do that thing where you search for metals and stuff, so we can keep on moving if necessary!”

    Moments later, a Legion of Coal unit slowly walks out, before stomping on the ground, and returning.

    Wolfen quietly blinks, then looks down. “That’s a lot of iron down there, a bit to the east. And what looks like a small deposit of coal a bit to the north.” Wolfen trails off. “There’s also a deep cave full of something which I suspect is either water, or oil. But I could be wrong.”

    “Easy to tell, isn’t it?” Kongou smiles, before stretching. “Just gotta release a couple of legion of coal units, as well as a driller unit!”

    Wolfen nods, before sending out a single drill, and a single legion of coal unit, before sitting down to rest.

    “Can’t do much more?” Kongou asks, sympathetically.

    Wolfen simply shakes her head, and leans back, to relax.

    “So, what’s your type of man you might want to be with?” Kongou asks, a big impish smile on her face.

    Wolfen goes a brilliant shade of red, before pausing, thinking. “Someone confident and strong. Able to be with me through thick and thin. I wouldn’t mind a cute blonde, but I just don’t know if I’m attracted to men or women, yet. We’re shipgirls, you know?” Wolfen pauses, thinking. “It’s hard to tell what gender I’m attracted to, especially since I know I want someone that will support me as much as I’d support them. Especially since I don’t want to outlive whoever I wind up with.”

    Kongou sits beside Wolfen, settling back to relax, while wrapping one arm around Wolfen’s shoulders. “A fair point, I suppose. If there was more shipgirls and I didn’t have Teitoku, I could say some of those others that are being summoned could have been fun to date, if nothing else.” Kongou pauses, rubbing her bangs as she thinks. “Though, I couldn’t stand them if they didn’t love tea as much as I do, so I’d probably wind up with someone Japanese built, or British built.” Kongou wryly admits.

    “Yeah. I do get it, considering mom’s tea parties before I became a shipgirl.” Wolfen admits quietly. “That was always tasty…” She trails off, thinking, then giggles. “Though the Kami of that little maglev train was always a little too hyper during tea parties, and kept spilling the tea.”

    Kongou outright giggles, and 15 minutes time is spent during small talk, simply passing the time and trading stories.

    “Teitoku has been a wonderful person to be with, I’ll admit! Your tips were all wonderful for convincing him to be with me!” Kongou smiles, before pausing. “What’s that sound?”

    “Sounds like the drilling machine coming back up in a hurry…” Wolfen stops to listen, before frowning, and putting her ear close to the hole.

    A flying drill shoots out of the hole it made earlier, followed by a geyser of oil. Wolfen’s eyes grow wide, before she puts her mouth over the hole, drinking off the tap, so to speak..

    “Ooh, good idea! Get it in some spare tanks for now, and then you can purify it later!” Kongou cheers, giggling the entire while.

    Wolfen gives a thumbs up, as she repeatedly gulps, her interior working on something to put on top of it as fast as she can.

    Eventually, she pulls her mouth away, and puts a plug over it, shivering for a moment, before wiping the oil off her face. “I feel mostly better, but still quite drained.”

    “Yeah, I figured it out, just now.” Mordred interjects, calmly, sticking her head out of one arm to do so. “You’ve grown stronger by a good chunk after killing those two Abyssal bigwigs that were threatening Hoppou, and your armor’s grown a bit. Same with weapons damage, and everything else. Except for Legend, that is.”

    Kongou and Wolfen turn to look at Mordred’s head sticking out of her arm, before Kongou takes a closer look. Inside, she can see vast amounts of machinery being worked on in Wolfen’s interior, rather than blood cells. For a moment, her eyes widened in surprise.

    “If we were needing 1 legend per day, for example, to keep up our stuff? Now we’re needing 1.6 a day. It doesn’t seem much more, but since I’m only getting dregs of power through the ring Erik made me, we’re going to need to find a new source as soon as we can.” Mordred admits.

    For a moment, Kongou thinks, eyes working miles a minute, before going still. “You don’t have enough crew for your legend, do you? You don’t have the variety you need to properly produce the spiritual power you need to operate.”

    Mordred nods at Kongou, quietly. “We’ve got enough for a couple of weeks of legend for at least half power function, and between the whale blubber and the drunk oil, we have oil for a damned long time. Hell, the orca meat is enough to keep us going as well for a long time! But apparently when we take on Abyssals that strong and win, we increase in strength or something?”

    “Resulting in your sole source unable to keep up with it.” Kongou sighs, stretching.

    Wolfen quietly nods. “Add in that the cloaking effect does use legend to trun on, but not to keep up?”

    “You’re going to lose your neat abilities soon if we can’t find a method to fix it all.” Kongou sighs. “Here I thought there weren’t any drawbacks.”

    “Well, let’s get things done as we can. I’ve got ideas on how to lessen the load for this setup, anyways.” Wolfen admits.

    It takes seven days. Seven days of work, as the small Legion of Coal units construct a life sized version of themselves. Seven days for a drilling unit to be built, the massive drill and storage container built in behind it calibrated perfectly to drill through the earth and bring up minerals.

    But life sized versions, built as Erik once built them, get to work on the island, with the understanding to replicate and build more on the other islands.

    Of course, if there were any other orders for later, it’s not like Wolfen would admit that to anyone. A girl’s going to have some secrets after all, right?

    Finally, Wolfen turns to Hoppou and her children, smiling. “They’ll be building a refinery here, to get iron, coal, oil, and the like out of the earth. Ready to go, though?”

    Hoppou nods, giving her children all gentle hugs. “Ayako will be by tomorrow, okay? Hoppou loves all of you, and wants you all happy and safe!”

    Pouts and tears turn to smiles, as the Abyssal children all nod, before Hoppou climbs onto Wolfen’s back gently.

    “Let’s go then! To adventure!” Wolfen cheers, before she and Kongou set sail on the water, Hoppou firmly on her back.




    1 Day Later, Izumo Province




    “Looks like Kongou was right, and we’ve got some sort of spiritual door here.” Wolfen says to Hoppou, quietly. “Let’s head through and…” Wolfen pauses in shock, at something Mordred saw on her bridge.

    A headline on one of the screens from the Satellite feed.

    “USS Arizona and Missouri slaughter the Senate for attempting to force USS Arizona to take abortion pills!”

    “Well, shit.” Wolfen murmurs quietly, since nothing else came to her to describe the screwed up situation.

    Yeah, I thought the same way.” Mordred stares, quietly as she starts thinking. “Tactically, it’s worrying. That they’d go so far to do it, means they were on the edge of their rope.

    Wolfen shakes her head, then looks at Hoppou. “Ready to go through?”

    “Hoppou is ready!” Hoppou hugs Wolfen tighter.

    Wolfen nods, walking through, feeling her satellite feed disconnect as she does so.

    If she’d stayed even a moment later, though, she’d have seen something else that would have worried her far, far more.

    “London Burning, British Royal Family presumed dead to the last. A sword in a stone has miraculously appeared far away from the fighting! Has the legend of King Arthur come once more?”

    Author’s Notes:

    To quote an excellent rendition of a crazy clown, now that we’ve hit some of the real meat of the story?

    And Here We Go.


    Enough said, I think, for the clusterfuck to come in politics world wide.

    Also, you're getting another chapter right after this one, so hold on tight!


    Edit: STOP PUTTING MY NEW CHAPTER INTO THE OLD ONE'S POST ALREADY!

    Okay. I'm going to leave it for a few hours, then post the next chapter. Because EVERY TIME I TRY to post, it adds it to this post in an update. Not in a new post. An update. It might be pissing me off just a tiny bit, too.
    Last edited by RanmaBushiko; December 19th, 2020 at 09:26 AM.
    I'm starting to suspect that talking with Kieran influences my rolls on Fate/Grand Order Heavily. How else can you explain me talking with him, then rolling for 30, only to get 3 Archer of Shinjuku on my second ten roll?

    I write like Douglas Adams. Proof: http://iwl.me/s/696f37bd

  4. #6784
    死徒 Dead Apostle RanmaBushiko's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Near Seattle
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    730
    US Friend Code
    691,985,459
    Blog Entries
    10
    Chapter 9: A Thousand Curses Upon This Wonderful World Extra Omake (Or: Where Aqua Drunkenly Fucks Up.)



    Aqua settles back, in the office, drunk. More specifically, drunk, a large cask of booze bigger than she is tall, the tap pouring another mug of alcohol for her. Three sheets to the wind, she smiles.

    “Mmmph. Another day of dealing with sending people off to deal with that Demon Lord…” She grumbles, under her breath, her words barely not slurred. Then she happily chugs another mug, before relaxing in her chair. “Comfy!”

    A bright flash in the room has Aqua suddenly jerking out of her drunken stupor. Then she frowns, at the two in the room. “Am… Amm I sheeing double?” Aqua slurs, drunk to the point where she can barely tell.

    “Ah, we’ve found someone! Hoppou is Hoppou, and we’re lost.” Hoppou replies, studying the blue haired lady in front of her and Wolfen, carefully.

    “Huh. That’sh new...“ Aqua tries to rub her chin, only to realize her mug is rubbing her chin, before resuming her current favorite thing of chugging alcohol. “Different? Kinda sorta maybe, too.” The slurring may make the words hard to understand at points, but she continues on, when she’s not gulping alcohol.

    Wolfen speaks up, looking at Aqua. “Good booze?”

    Aqua nods, rapidly, almost falling out of her chair as she does so. “It’sh stuff from that Dionys...Dionyshus fellow over in a… Mountain shomewhere? Or on? Sho tasty! It’sh good shtuff!”

    “Can you tell us where we’re at, perhaps?” Hoppou asks, studying the rather hard to place area they’re in.

    “Ahh…” Aqua pauses for a long moment, brain cells firing in random ways. “Um… right? Right! The official title ish I’m the current…” Aqua pauses, thinking on how to word it that won’t get her fired, then after a sip of liquid courage, says it anyways. “Butt monkey for shending poor people to another world after they kick the bucket, to deal with… what’sh the name? Oh! With a demon lord problem.”

    Quiet blinking from the other two in the room.

    “Yup!” Aqua continues. “Shee, this guy’sh really being super annoying for thoshe of us that have to deal with his… nonshenshe.” Aqua chugs another mug, frowning. “Sho we keep shending poor…” Aqua pauses, pouring herself more. “Poor shchmucks to face off with him, giving them shuper neat powerful things!”

    Hoppou looks at Wolfen. Wolfen looks at Hoppou. Then they both look back at Aqua, carefully.

    “What sort of things, might we ask?” Wolfen asks.

    “Eh? You’re not gone yet? Right, wandered in here. Where wash I?” Another mug chugged, before Aqua leans over to study them. “Neat treashuresh! Legendary Itemsh! Powerful thingamajingeys!”

    “Does that mean you have access to people that can give abilities, or powers?” Wolfen asks, carefully.

    Aqua nods, while chugging more of her current drink.

    Wolfen and Hoppou turn to look at each other again, quietly.

    “Could we inquire if the Trident of Poseidon is one of the items sent to this place?” Hoppou asks, carefully.

    “Gonna… gonna have to give me something for that, I’mma afraid.” Aqua slurs, rather now colossally drunk.

    “Hmm… what’s the worst part of your job?” Wolfen asks, carefully.

    “The paperwork!” Aqua growls, voice suddenly more lucid. “I loathe that shtuff!

    Wolfen smirks. “Ever thought about a mechanical assistant?”

    Aqua blinks. Then blinks again. Looks into her cup, then back up at Wolfen. “Thish ish really good shtuff if I’m hearing shtuff like that from a nobody like you…” Aqua admits

    See.” Wolfen admits. “Daddy made a lot of unique things when making me…”

    “Making? Ishn’t that shlang for sex?” Aqua mutters in the background, not caring if she interrupts.

    “But the most unique of them is unique mechanical people that could handle paperwork for him!” Wolfen continues, carefully watching the drunk goddess that is Aqua.

    Aqua blinks. “I might…” A long pause, as she drinks more from the massive cask, thinking. “I might… be able to shwing something for you? Maybe? Kinda?” Her voice slurs, as she thinks.

    “I could sweeten the pot, I suppose…” Wolfen admits, musing. “You seem to like alcohol, perhaps using the runes I know to ensure a container has an endless supply of alcohol in it for as long as divine power is within the container, fueling it, in return for some boons, as well?”

    “ITS’SHA DEAL!” Aqua blurts out, slurring as she jumps up, then hugs them both.

    Wolfen smiles widely at Hoppou, before Hoppou speaks up. “Can you tell us where the Trident of Poseidon is, then?”

    Aqua pauses, then frowns as she releases them to sit back down, legs wobbling as she does so, before pulling a book out of the desk to her right. For a bit, she flips the pages, frowning. “I could have sworn… AHA! Yeah, shomeone asked for it as hish weapon of choice for dealing with the Demon Lord. It’s currently in that univershe, and shtuck there unlessh he killsh the Demon Lord fellow. Thing.”

    A frown covers Hoppou and Wolfen faces. “Well, that just won’t do. If it’s not here, then that could screw with the shipgirl situation terribly…” Wolfen admits, rubbing her chin.

    “That’sh…” Aqua pauses, frowning. “That’sh shupposhed to be fixed by Chrishmash time. Ish. According to my shuperiorsh anywaysh…” Aqua frowns, then drinks again. “Dimenshional shenanigansh or shomething like that.”

    The frown on Wolfen’s face, deepens. “Could you elaborate?”

    “Shomething about a Fleet of Fog? Arpeggio of shomething shteel? Invading from another univershe with railgun nukesh?” Aqua continues, drunk as hell now. “Shince I can’t make up to you the trident, maybe a couple minor itemsh might help?”

    With that, Aqua pulls out a couple of sheets of paper, before laying them in front of Wolfen and Hoppou.

    A long pause as Wolfen and Hoppou both look at them, then frown. “Could I ask for a minor ability, instead?”

    Aqua blinks, then nods rapidly, doing her best to not spill any of her booze. “Yush! Of courshe!”

    Hoppou smiles. “The ability to ensure that while I’m a part of Wolfen’s faction, I and others in the faction don’t lose abilities we inherently have.”

    A circular pillar appears around Hoppou, before Hoppou flashes white. “There you goesh! And for you, bounteoush giver of shweet shweet bubbly booze?”

    Wolfen muses. “As much as I’d like to ask for something like daddy’s goggles, I think I’ve got a better idea. Would you have the ability to make me a compass to lead me towards things I desire most?”

    Aqua blinks. Then blinks again. “Shomething like that? Yesh! Itsa deal!” After that, Aqua starts working on her booze again, before pausing. “Oh, right!”

    Another circular pillar appears around Wolfen, before a compass slowly falls into her hands.

    “Ish shtraight from shomeone that worksh with ush on occashion!” Aqua smiles. “Now, runesh and paperwork helper thing?”

    Wolfen smiles, then puts down a large metal cup in front of aqua, as well as a rapidly growing Legion of Coal unit. Then she nods towards the Legion of Coal unit, as it finishes assembling, before wincing. “That took a lot more out of me than I thought… ah, what’s your name, by the way?

    “Aqua! Didn’t I menshion that before?” Aqua retorts, pouting.

    Wolfen and Hoppou simply shake their heads, before Wolfen gets to work, carving Aqua’s name into the mug. Then Wolfen smiles, adding a top to it, so it looks more like a travel coffee mug.

    “It’ll produce endless amounts of alcohol for you, of whatever you pour in!” Wolfen smiles, giving it to Aqua.

    For one long moment, Aqua pauses, staring at it like she’s received the Holy Grail. Then she smiles, pouring her mug into the drink, before sipping. Then gulping. Then chugging.

    “IT WORKSH! YOU’RE AMAZING!” With those words, Aqua hugs them both, gleefully.

    “Could you get us back home, so we can deal with the shipgirl stuff, please?” Hoppou asks, blinking.

    “I’m tempted to give you shomething elshe for helping me with this… any shmall shtuff you wish to ask for?” Aqua slurs, studying them both.

    Hoppou raises her hand. “Could you let me teleport to Wolfen here, no matter where she goes?”

    Aqua nods, another circular column appears, before Hoppou flashes once more.

    “I was going to ask for my guns to actually hurt my enemies better…” Wolfen pouts.

    Hoppou simply hugs Wolfen, close. “It means Hoppou can always find you!”

    Aqua looks at them both, then points at two of several markings on the floor, forming nearby. “That one ish to go back, and the other one’sh to go to deal with the Demon Lord.

    “Thank you! Don’t forget about us, please!” Hoppou smiles, before walking to the pad, dragging Wolfen with. “Now to surprise Misato, Saki and Ayako!”

    A brilliant bright red light flashes, before Aqua frowns, rapidly sobering up at the sight. “Oh. I sent them to the wrong one, huh?”

    Aqua slowly looks down, then up to the cask beside her, before sighing and stowing her mug of infinite alcohol away.

    “Eris! Gonna need your help for my screwup!” With those somewhat slurred words, Aqua stumbles out of the room, struggling to find her friend.

    A month later, she would curse herself every moment for weeks, for not keeping the mug in hand, when she got picked as a legendary item of power to be brought with.




    45 Minutes Later




    Wolfen and Hoppou walk through the streets of the city they’ve found themselves in.

    “The people all seem nice, Wolfen!” Hoppou admits. “We’re not going to get to that trident, though?”

    “I found myself missing daddy, and then the compass I got started pointing me towards this way. Maybe he’s here, or someone he knows that could lead me to him?”

    Hoppou nods, hugging Wolfen’s arm as they go along. Wolfen gently pats Hoppou’s head with her free hand, before continuing on, Hoppou hugging her arm as they search.

    “You were pretty sneaky with the abilities you got, there, though.” Wolfen admits with a smile. “That’ll give us good benefits later, I think.”

    Tactically, it’s a good decision, too.” Mordred muses.

    Hoppou nods, thinking. “Why was Mordred quiet while you were talking with that lady we made a deal with? With those upgrades, usually I can hear her, but I didn’t hear her at all until a moment ago...”

    Too dangerous, when dealing with someone that strong.” Mordred admits, arms folded. “She scared me nearly as much as being around my mother did, back in the day. She might not look it, but that blue haired drunkard was as strong as Erik, if not more so.

    Hoppou nods, slowly, as she thinks.

    “Oh, hey, the compass is pointing directly in front of us!” Wolfen cheers, before blinking as she spots someone.

    More specifically two someones.

    “Ohmigosh!” Wolfen giggles with glee, then runs forwards.

    50 feet!

    20 feet!

    10 feet!

    5 feet!

    Wolfen pounce and glomps, then rolls in such a way so she winds up on the bottom with Godafrid on top of her, a wide grin on her face.

    “UNCLE GODAFRID! FOUND YOU!” The look of abject confusion on his face is confusing to Wolfen for one long moment, before she pauses, and looks at herself. “Oh, right. Not a ship anymore. Hi Uncle Godafrid, I’m the shipgirl Wolfen!”

    What.” Godafrid slowly twitches.

    “Part of me crashed in some land where there were all these things called shipgirls, and abyssals! And I made friends with Kongou, and Hoppou over behind me, who’s been a cute adorable sister that I want to introduce to daddy! Speaking of whom, have you seen him since things ended the way they did?” Wolfen smiles widely, as she studies Godafrid.

    “I’m afraid Illyasviel hasn’t seen any signs of your father… and Zelretch only cackles when Rin brings him up.” Shirou admits, rubbing his forehead. “Though how you’re here…

    Wolfen smiles, and hugs her honorary uncle close. “Hoppou, get over here and give uncle Godafrid a hug, will you? He knew daddy!”

    “Hoppou is coming!” As Hoppou gets close, Godafrid stares. Then slowly looks between Wolfen and Hoppou in somewhat horrified understanding, as recognition of what “shipgirls” means finally sinks in.

    Then Hoppou joins in on hugging Godafrid, gently.

    For one moment, Wolfen can barely hear Godafrid muttering. “Kancolle?! I remember enjoying ‘Harry and the Shipgirls’ but…” A moment’s pause, then Godafrid continues. “Tamamo, why did you let Erik watch Kantai Collection . . .?

    Then he frowns, embracing them both, as he thinks. “How many shipgirls are there?”

    Wolfen blinks, before scratching her chin, slowing down her words as she works things out. “Well, um… maybe 15, total? It involves a ‘Trident of Poseidon’, which apparently somehow wound up here… and all the Abyssals showed up to fight for it, while all the shipgirls didn’t.

    A long pause, as Godafrid introduces his palm to his face. "'Trident of Poseidon?' A Kantai Collection and Pirates of the Caribbean crossover-verse - why not? Because the one thing your lot needed was an even more complicated setup . . ."

    “So a complete and utter clusterfuck, then?” Godafrid asks, before Wolfen nods.

    “Well, you two got lost. You should be glad that my friend sent me to find you two after you went into the wrong teleporter!” A female voice echoes from behind Wolfen and Hoppou.

    “But it’s Uncle Godafrid! He’s friends with Daddy!” Wolfen pouts back at the lady behind her.

    Chris stares at both, before sighing softly. “Fine. Five minutes, then I’m taking you two back, okay?”

    Wolfen quietly nods, hugging her uncle closer. “Can you see if Illyasviel can contact me after this is done? I’d like advice on things…” Wolfen pulls her uncle close, whispering into his ear. “Especially since the blue haired lady mentioned we’d have to deal with Arpeggio of something Steel, and railgun nukes come Christmas time or so, taking on shipgirls and Abyssals alike, while drunk..”

    “Arpeggio of Blue Steel?” Godafrid murmurs, quietly. “I’d heard of it, but…” A long moment passes, before he winces. “Oh, that’s not good. Start building nukes, is all I can say, and hope yours trumps theirs. As for Illyasviel, we don’t have contact.”

    “Pity. I was going to show her Captain Mordred Pendragon, who’s currently my only living crew member!” Wolfen murmurs. “And let Mordred talk with his father.”

    “Time’s up, you two!” A firm grip grabs them, picking them up.

    “It’s only been a minute and a half, not five!” Wolfen yelps.

    “And the teleport spell that’s paid for by that little idiot, is about to go off. You’ve had some chatting with them, so off we go!” Chris retorts.

    Godafrid glances over, then speaks up quietly in Chris’ direction. "I don't suppose you would be interested in being hired, Milady? I'd like to hire you later, if I may . . ."

    Chris blinks at them, then nods.

    “Bye Uncle Godafrid!” Hoppou waves.

    “And when we’re back, I’m taking back that compass you’re wearing, brat.” Chris admits.

    “Payment for services rendered, I'm afraid. She was rather clear about that it's mine, now.” Wolfen retorts.

    “...We’ll talk later.” Chris retorts, before pulling them both a ways off.

    Then both disappear.




    15 Minutes Later, With Eris




    “So. You made her a custom made drinking cup, and gave her a mechanical machine based on your father’s work, and she gave three boons of your choosing?!” Chris sighs, rubbing her forehead. “Well, at least this is coming out of her pay, and not mine.

    “You’re super pretty!” Hoppou admits, studying the lady in front of her. “Do you want to be friends?”

    A long pause, as Chris looks at the Abyssal in front of her. “Oh, you’re a shipgirl and Abyssal traveling together. Wait. How are you doing this without…” Chris frowns. Then she discards the mortal disguise, to look at them more carefully. A long moment passes, as Hoppou and Wolfen both notice her now more bounteous cleavage, before looking back up to her.

    “Huh. Well, that explains a bit.” Eris admits. “Personal boat of a dimensional traveling God that accidentally wound up here, or part of you did?”

    Wolfen nods. “Hoppou’s been helping me a lot with certain things, as well as Kongou.”

    “Hmm. Well, nice to meet you then. I’m Eris, Goddess of Fortune. We normally don’t get shipgirls and the like around here, due to certain circumstances. Will you two keep quiet about your little jaunt to another universe?” Eris asks, carefully.

    Wolfen nods, followed by Hoppou. “Can we mention the odd encounter with Aqua, though? Perhaps that you helped us out from being rather lost?”

    Eris slowly nods. “I suppose you can…”

    “Could we also mention that the Trident of Poseidon is out of reach to Abyssals, at least?” Hoppou asks, carefully. “The shipgirls might not remember about it, but the Abyssals do.

    Eris pauses, her mind obviously racing, before she slowly sighs. “Aqua sent it over with some stupid boy or girl, didn’t she?”

    Wolfen and Hoppou nod.

    Slowly, Eris puts her face in her palms. For one long moment, she just leaves her face in her palms, before she finally looks up. “Why not! It’s her mess, after all. Yes, give some random shut-in a weapon of extreme power, like that, why not! Aqua, sometimes I swear…

    For a long moment, Eris just sighs, before looking back at them. “Now, could you explain to me exactly what Hoppou is? I keep thinking she’s a demon, but she doesn’t quite register like one enough for me to attack her. I loathe demons with a passion, and kill them wherever I can, so you can imagine how irritating it is for me.”

    Hoppou smiles sadly, looking down, as Wolfen sighs. “Poseidon was pulling stupid bullshit with the ships that wound up in his version of an afterlife. Set them against each other, much like some nerds with that Warhammer 40k stuff.” Wolfen explains. “Losers lost their crew, and had to pick and choose new crew from the dregs of the ocean, so to speak. Sailors that weren’t nearly so pleasant as the original.”

    Eris folds her arms. “Go on.”

    “Imagine waking up, only half your skills are gone, because your crew is missing. You can barely think, you can barely comprehend things. Then new crew slowly winds up grabbing on your arms, your legs, and forcing themselves to be a new crew for yourself, resulting in you getting new abilities. But it all feels wrong.” Wolfen admits, quietly. “From what Hoppou said to me, after it happened a lot to her, she chose somehow, to take in the children. The lost, the lonely, those that had died confused, at sea.”

    Eris starts to slowly look towards Hoppou with no little horror in her eyes, as Hoppou quietly nods.

    Wolfen sighs, softly. “She traded how well she could defend her crew, for the ability to take on children, and guide the souls of children claimed by Poseidon to her, and her fleets. If anything, Hoppou is a martyr of the highest order, sacrificing every chance to reclaim her crew, to save children. Her allies might not be quite as selfless, but they chose to take in privateers, rather than murderous scum.”

    For a moment, Wolfen pauses, trying to word it better. “The best way I can put it, is that her and her fleet is acting as a miniature heaven or afterlife for the children lost at sea, until whoever replaces Poseidon gets off their ass, and fixes it enough to have a proper place again. Add in that the trident is gone?”

    Slowly, Eris nods, thinking, before glancing at paperwork. “I’ll be able to teleport you out soon, you two. Thank you for explaining things to me. That makes a lot of horrible, terrifying sense. If I ever meet his replacement, I’ll have words with them on ensuring things are better.”

    “Before that, perhaps a privacy field would be in order?” Wolfen asks, an amused smile on her face.

    For a moment, Eris frowns, then nods slowly. A ripple in the air appears around them, before Eris nods. “That’ll do it. What’s so important?”

    “Well, for one, I noticed you stuff your bra. Have you ever thought about physical illusions to counter that issue?” Wolfen asks, carefully.

    Eris’s face goes completely red, before she then reinforces the privacy field further, to ensure no one has heard that. “Y-yes. Yes I do. But finding a kitsune in this day and age…” Eris sighs. “Not likely, anymore, I’m afraid.”

    “Well, Daddy might’ve been the Norse god of Mecha, but he had training from Wayland Smith.” Wolfen starts. “More than that, Mommy may not have built me, so much as built in certain systems, but I know the basics of her kitsune illusions, and how Daddy used runes to make them solid.” With those words, Wolfen finishes with a wide grin.

    Eris pauses, then slowly starts to smile. “You want something.”

    Wolfen nods, smiling more. “A message for Uncle Godafrid, a few questions, perhaps a boon or two, and a guarantee that this won’t get to your bosses, for what we discuss in this privacy field.”

    Eris frowns, looking down. “In return, a bra that gives me better cleavage?”

    At Eris’ words, Wolfen nods. “A few pairs!”


    “A few, meaning you won’t let me reverse engineer it?” Eris asks, carefully.

    “It’s a seller's market, isn’t it?” Wolfen retorts. “Being on your good side is worth cutting down on the price so much.”

    Eris’s answering nod is the only reply Wolfen gets, but she smiles nevertheless. “Now, would the Trident of Poseidon and the Compass Aqua traded me mean that the universe Hoppou is from was a Pirates of the Caribbean universe, originally?”

    Eris shakes her head. “The Trident’s idea came from a universe that Poseidon conquered, but was gravely wounded in. It took him a very long time to heal. One similar existed there. However, the Compass likely is one of the artifacts Poseidon looted from that realm. The favored compass of a man who served a bound goddess, even unknowingly.” Eris admits.

    Wolfen slowly nods. “You might want to let Uncle Godafrid know about that. Especially with how he was hoping to hire you as a Thief?”

    Eris nods, smiling, as Wolfen settles back.

    “Second off, could you tell me why the Trident of Poseidon was pulled from Hoppou’s home universe? The shipgirls and Abyssals are stuck in a combat loop that’s sucked in the entire world, because the damned thing is missing and meant for Poseidon’s replacement.” Wolfen asks, carefully studying Eris’ face.

    Eris goes very, very still, before slowly looking at Hoppou. Then back at Wolfen.

    “Aqua, you idiot. What have you done?!” Eris mumbles, under her breath.

    Hoppou and Wolfen both nod in sync, quietly, before Wolfen admits. “It kind of gets worse. The Shipgirls simply don’t remember the fighting they were in, but the Abyssals do. Given that the Shipgirls has given the Abyssals a horrible case of PTSD, it’s made a mess of the world. And something Aqua mentioned that her bosses are thinking about to counter the situation worried me.”

    Eris stills, rubbing her head. “Let me guess, the first boon is to ensure I don’t talk about it, and work to help you?”

    Wolfen nods.

    “Agreed.” For a moment, Eris flickers white, before she sighs. “Lay it on me, how bad is it?”

    “Aqua drunkenly mentioned there’s going to be a purge of shipgirls and Abyssals sometime around Christmas, something about Arpeggio of ‘something’ Steel, which Uncle Godafrid said was ‘Arpeggio of Blue Steel’. More than that, Aqua mentioned railgun nukes.” Wolfen quitely admits with a grimace. “I suspect they’re planning on wiping the board clean using an outside third party force, as an incursion on the universe I’ve made my home in.”

    Eris stills, before snarling. “Stupid office politics. Instead of fixing the blunder they’re killing future allies!

    Wolfen nods, quietly, before Hoppou hugs Eris’ leg, gently. “Could you please help us, Miss Eris? We’ll be happy to help you, in turn!”

    “Keep in mind, also, that I’m the only source of these new bras for you.” Wolfen adds. “I won’t throw you under the bus, and insist on you doing insane things, but a little help to ensure we have a fighting chance would be useful.”

    Eris sits, thinking. “At best? I may be able to influence a high ranking member of the enemy fleet to help you, instead of fighting you. But only one.

    Wolfen nods, quietly. “Better than nothing, thank you. Any suggestions for nuclear weapons to use against the enemy?”

    Eris pauses. “I’ll let you know if I can ever find that out.”

    Wolfen nods, thinking. As she does so, Hoppou speaks up. “Whatever happened to the Norse Gods? Wolfen tells me stories about the ones she knew, but I don’t know about my universe’s version of the pantheon.”

    “Fenris devoured most of them, to be honest. He was holding some supremely overpowered ability back, and crushed them when the final battle actually came, bringing himself to a form at least a hundred times stronger than anything we ever dreamed of being possible. The survivors were rescued by a passing deity from another universe, who formed something called the ‘Goddess Relief Office’.” Eris admits. “We don’t have much interaction with them, aside from knowing they exist, and that there might be a portal there from the ruins of Asgard.”

    “Did the dwarves leave with?” Wolfen asks, carefully. “I lost a good chunk of my crew, and haven’t found the engineers I need to replace them.”

    “They still live near Svartalfheim, though the roads and paths are almost all lost.” Eris admits, before glancing to the compass around Wolfen’s neck. “If there are any left, that might lead you to them. I believe some smith God lives with them, ensuring they can still survive, though he’s now old and frail, without Asgard’s golden fruits to give him eternal youth and vigor.”

    Wolfen slowly nods, thinking. “Thank you. That may help with some of my issues.”

    “As for your issues with this… ‘Arpeggio of Blue Steel’, I’ll look into it in private, and see what I can do to influence things in the background. Would you prefer a general ‘Good Fortune’ boon, to one of you? Or a minor ‘Fortune’ boon to one aspect of your abilities?” Eris asks carefully. “That’s about all I have to offer, unless you want to be able to steal things using magic? Of course, since that’s luck based, it might not go well for you two.”

    Wolfen and Hoppou look at each other, thinking. “You did get the last boon, Hoppou.”

    Hoppou nods, musing. “Wolfen’s the most durable shipgirl I’ve ever encountered.” Hoppou admits, quietly. “Hoppou knows that well.” For a moment, Hoppou frowns, struggling to work out how to speak outside of referencing herself, before sighing. “As much as Hoppou wishes it was to help with Hoppou’s own issues, it should go to Wolfen.”

    Hoppou’s quiet speech is quietly interrupted by a hug from Wolfen, gently.

    “Could you enhance ‘Good Fortune’ as a boon, to influence two things, for me?” Wolfen asks.

    “I suppose I could try.” Eris admits, thoughtfully.

    “Give me one of your bras, and I’ll start working on a few while thinking it over.” Wolfen admits, mind lost in thought.

    It takes a couple of hours to get all the material. But soon enough, Eris is wearing a new bra, giving her noticeably more bounteous cleavage, much to her apparent joy.

    “It’s so comfortable! Thank you!” Eris cheers, smiling.

    “Of course! Just keep that full of legend, or divine power, or whatever you’re using, to keep it topped up, okay?” Wolfen admits.

    “Now, as for that boon, have you decided?” Eris asks, her smile never fading as she looks herself over in the mirror.

    “You know how you can occasionally hit for a critical success in a video game? I’d like my attacks to have something like that, for my armaments. Lucky shots for my aim that’ll more likely hit critical systems, for one. The other is for the compass to lead me to lucky things that will help me out in the search to be able to defeat the invasion coming Christmas time.” Wolfen admits.

    “Not just what you want, but what will lead you to the best success?” Eris muses, somewhat amused. “That first one could come as an option for guaranteed critical damage, only a few times a day, at will. Alternatively, it could be a straight 10% chance across the board of a critical hit.”

    “Wolfen pauses, thinking carefully. “The second one sounds smarter, to be honest. I’ll take that.”

    “So many foolishly take the first one. It’s nice to see someone that thinks it over like that, for a change.” Eris admits. “As for the second one, if you’re searching for something in general to upgrade you, it’ll automatically go towards something that’s a ‘luckier find’. Will that work well?”

    “Only if you can adjust it to accept something so ‘general’, rather than just my ‘heart’s desire’.” Wolfen admits.

    Eris nods, before flashes ripple around Wolfen and her compass both. Then, after a moment of looking exhausted, Eris pulls herself back up to stand straight and tall once more. “I’ll send you two out. Don’t expect to meet me again, girls, until it’s time for new bras for myself.”

    A moment of reality flickering, then they’re gone, leaving Eris alone.

    After a few minutes, Eris sighs softly. “Another screw-up from Aqua, huh? At this rate, I’m going to be taking her job from her, and she still doesn’t care. Now, to meddle with things a bit.”

    With those words, she disappears.

    Moments later, Aqua sticks her head in. “Erish? Hic. Aww, she’sh gone! Wash going to shee if thoshe girlsh were all right.”

    For a moment, she frowns, before looking at her new mug. “Oh well, more booze for me!”

    With those words, Aqua leaves, happily chugging from her mug all the alcohol she can drink.




    With Wolfen and Hoppou, Izumo, Japan




    “So, our first step is to find the stone Tamamo no Mae was sealed in, or a kitsune. Then what?” Hoppou asks, curiously.

    “Then we’re going to be hunting down Daddy’s mentor in smithing and engineering, of course! Though that one feels weaker, and it’s worrying me.” Wolfen admits, thinking.

    Not to mention how dangerous that entire situation was?” Mordred adds in. “That Eris scared me. Not to mention whatever was off with Godafrid. It felt like only a part of him was there or something.

    Hoppou frowns, glancing over at Wolfen. “Hoppou thought she just heard Mordred speaking. Something about Godafrid feeling off?”

    Mordred blinks, followed by Wolfen doing the same, before looking over. “Perhaps it’s part of your boon from Aqua? You were right about Mordred, after all.”

    “Makes sense!” Hoppou admits. “Still, something was odd with him during the hug. Like he was missing stuff, but at the same time, the missing stuff might be elsewhere? Maybe? Or perhaps more like his fate that he exists there hasn’t been stabilized yet?”

    “Odd.” Wolfen muses. “Let’s go get to the stone first, or at least find a kitsune, then see Daddy’s mentor. He feels weak, but doesn’t seem that weak yet.”

    With those words, Wolfen pulls Hoppou onto her back, before taking off as her cloak engages.




    With Eris, On the Deck of the Yamato




    Eris frowns, as she appears on a battleship, her mind concentrating as reality almost pulls inwards on her. Gravity roils around the ship she’s landed on, while the floor itself feels like it could be changed to something else at any moment. “Interesting differences for this universe.” She admits, quietly, before looking around. “Now where would this ‘Yamoto’ be at? She’s the lynchpin for the future, after all, irregardless of which Mental Model she uses.”

    “You’re on my hull, why wouldn’t I be here? Now, how did you arrive on my deck, and who are you?” Two women walk forwards, one with eyes that look suspiciously like camera lenses.

    “The Mental Models of Yamoto, I presume? Good day, my name is Eris, Goddess of Fortune, and I’m here about my bosses planning on using some of your fleet in the near future to wipe out possible future allies to my pantheon in a dimensional incursion later this year.” Eris bows with a smile, as the two in front of her freeze up. “I’ve come to help downplay the damage to your sides and the side of the two girls I just met, and to work to help you ensure your fleet doesn’t commit needless genocide as pawns of a greater game.”

    “We’re listening.” With those words, both Mental Models sit, staring at Eris carefully. “Please, do tell this Yamoto what’s going on.”



    Author’s Notes:

    This has been rewritten, a whole lot more than I thought it would. First from a ten page snippet, involving Wolfen and Hoppou being chased by the Gods for no good reason, to Eris possibly fighting Hoppou over being an Abyssal. Finally, I worked out how Abyssals were different enough that Eris couldn’t actually do that, and had her question things.

    I was also pretty well split over if Eris would be of help or not, but everything on the wiki has good things to say about her. Unlike Aqua, anyways.

    Of course, getting “falsies” that can’t register as being padded breasts might change things for Eris and Aqua in later arcs of Konosuba, but that’s a long time in coming.

    Admittedly, by that time, Aqua will be thanking Eris for the luck in Kazuma choosing her as his object of power, of choice. After all, it keeps her from being introduced to eternal torment by her pantheon for having let slip that her bosses wanted the shipgirls and Abyssals all dead! She just didn’t get to bring the cup of eternal booze with her.

    Yes, the Trident of Poseidon is vaguely based off of the Pirates of the Caribbean one, mostly in that Poseidon saw it, and modified his trident after seeing his alternate’s version. Probably stupid of him, really, since if he hadn’t done that, he’d more likely have lasted longer, rather than playing stupid games with dead ships and people that died at sea. But a God’s going to have entertainment somehow, and considering how deities tend to look at mortals as their entertainment? It’s usually at humanity’s expense.

    The other inspiration for the Trident of Poseidon is the game Hades. Don’t judge me, that roguelike is good stuff, if hard.

    As for the last bits. Yamoto leads the entirety of the pacific fleets for the Fleet of Fog, with Kongou as one of her fleet leaders, and is unique enough to have two Mental Models to do calculations with, rather than one. There’s a whole lot of spoilers for the manga, involving that, I’ll admit.

    Wolfen and Hoppou picked up that this Godafrid is a possibility, rather than a guaranteed storyline, even if he can’t. Mostly because they’re spiritual beings, and so they can tell he exists, even if Kieran doesn’t decide on keeping this storyline around as an actual series, but just as a “what if” series instead in the Mission Dossier.

    Of course, considering it’s a temporary crossover, and Eris is going to have very little to do with things going forwards besides what she’s telling Yamoto off screen? There’s not much crossover, or seeing if Kieran will continue the Konosuba snips or not. But he reasonably existed long enough for this to technically be canon.
    Last edited by RanmaBushiko; December 18th, 2020 at 11:11 PM.
    I'm starting to suspect that talking with Kieran influences my rolls on Fate/Grand Order Heavily. How else can you explain me talking with him, then rolling for 30, only to get 3 Archer of Shinjuku on my second ten roll?

    I write like Douglas Adams. Proof: http://iwl.me/s/696f37bd

  5. #6785
    吸血鬼 Vampire
    Join Date
    Mar 2019
    Age
    28
    Posts
    248
    Wolfen presumably has... gained a Legend dot? I'm not entirely sure what affects legend consumption that way, but it sounds something like that. Good incentive to go exploring.

    I am not a fan of the Missouri interlude, at all. It breaks my immersion fairly hard in a few ways. I would just cut the entire thing and give the headline summary afterwards. Spelling out the variety of issues there is a bit more than I feel like doing right now, though if you want a really detailed criticism, I could go for it, if you think parts of that scene are important, but I don't even really want to look at it for grammar nitpicks.

    I am much more interested in the Konosuba crossover, though the foreshadowing about the Sword in the Stone is also fascinating, and implies... even more of a clusterfuck. Though perhaps that's for Mordred somehow. I appreciate the need for all of this side story for the actual omake crossover to make any sense.

    Wolfen has alarmingly useful abilties for bargaining with deities. I definitely appreciate the depiction of Eris as being more responsible and considerate, it definitely seems accurate to what I've seen of her in Konosuba. Godafrid's depiction also seems quite apt.

    The way the Konosuba deities are intervening in multiple concurrent realities feels really interesting. The Works operates at a much smaller scale, but the contrast is satisfying, somehow.

    Choice of 10% critical chance vs choice-based activation is interesting. I presume we're dealing with enough individual rolls of the dice that 10% adds up quickly. I guess the other thing is that it gives more opportunity to get lucky, which, when you're blessed by the Goddess of Fortune, is something you can lean into.

    I do not know enough about Arpeggio of Blue Steel to comment much on Eris's intervention, or possible consequences, but that does explain the "and two more series" part.

    nitpicking non-Missouri things
    Also, the captain’s uniform isn’t disappearing anymore, but the Legion of Coal randomly all run out of power now at random.
    This sentence seems to have gotten worked over a few times, but now it's extremely redundant.

    she gave three boons of you two’s choice
    This is... not good phrasing. Just "of your choosing" works okay, since "your" can be plural.

    Could we also mention that the Trident of Poseidon is out of reach to Abyssals, if not why?
    I'm not sure what this sentence is trying to do. "If not why?" sounds like would fit with "ask if the trident is out of reach", but it doesn't work with "mention that". You could probably just drop the "If not why".

    that Warhammer 40k stuff.” Wolfen admits.
    That's not admits, that's "explains". "admits" has an entirely different connotation, Wolfen isn't trying to hide this information. The second time, with "But it all feels wrong" is a better usage, because that at least sounds emotionally painful, but it's not her secret, still. It seems weird that Wolfen is explaining that part when Hoppou is literally right there, but Wolfen is probably the more eloquent speaker. I feel like that might have been a good opportunity to have Hoppou talk, though.

    Eris frowns, looking down. “In return, a bra that gives me better cleavage?” At Eris’ words, Wolfen nods. “A few pairs!”

    “A few, meaning you won’t let me reverse engineer it?” Eris asks, carefully.

    “It’s a buyer’s market, isn’t it?” Wolfen retorts. “Being on your good side is worth cutting down on the price so much.”
    I think you're jumping speakers without line breaks on the first line, and it's a bit confusing. That needs a line break somewhere.
    Also, Wolfen's response here is a non-sequitur on several levels. Eris is asking "so the catch is that you're not giving me the info to do this myself? This seems it could be a better deal", and Wolfen's response is "look at how generous I'm being!", which... doesn't match the question. Also, "a buyer's market" means prices are low, and again, Eris is describing Wolfen as driving a somewhat hard bargain. And the line after, "Eris’s answering nod is the only reply Wolfen gets" it is entirely unclear who the speaker is, until you get to the next line for context. The character voices are not differentiated enough to get away with that.

    More than that, Aqua mentioned railgun nukes.” Wolfen admits, her arms folded
    The folded arms and "admits" are at odds. Most "says" synonyms actually feel a bit awkward here, though. Just "Wolfen grimaces" into the next sentence is smoother, but I suspect there are better options. There are several more instances, which I'm not going to cover. Admits is versatile, but not this versatile. Similarly, chaining two "retorts" together back at
    “Payment for services rendered. You can’t take it back.” Wolfen retorts.
    feels messy.

    I also wouldn't mind a bit of formatting on the scene cut descriptions, like "With Eris". Admittedly that doesn't translate well from a word processor to forum without manual adjustment, but the way Kieran wraps them in italics is good for visually breaking things up.
    Last edited by Arbitrarity; December 18th, 2020 at 07:49 PM.

  6. #6786
    死徒 Dead Apostle RanmaBushiko's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Near Seattle
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    730
    US Friend Code
    691,985,459
    Blog Entries
    10
    Quote Originally Posted by Arbitrarity View Post
    Wolfen presumably has... gained a Legend dot? I'm not entirely sure what affects legend consumption that way, but it sounds something like that. Good incentive to go exploring.
    Kancolle has a level up system. She went up 6 levels, and is paying 1/10th more legend per level to keep her things operational, as a result.

    I am not a fan of the Missouri interlude, at all. It breaks my immersion fairly hard in a few ways. I would just cut the entire thing and give the headline summary afterwards. Spelling out the variety of issues there is a bit more than I feel like doing right now, though if you want a really detailed criticism, I could go for it, if you think parts of that scene are important, but I don't even really want to look at it for grammar nitpicks.
    Would you rather it be stuck in spoiler tags, and left for people to read? Or re-written as an interlude, for the Missouri part? It's very much necessary, and very much how politics can go when things start to truly go to hell in the world. Also, remember. This is set in 2013. That clusterfuck had to happen, if shipgirls were ever going to get rights, and the politicians of the world were going to ever realize that "No, they're women more than they are ships now, and they have their own thoughts, feelings, and enough firepower to kill us if we try to push them in a patriarchal oriented society".

    I am much more interested in the Konosuba crossover, though the foreshadowing about the Sword in the Stone is also fascinating, and implies... even more of a clusterfuck. Though perhaps that's for Mordred somehow. I appreciate the need for all of this side story for the actual omake crossover to make any sense.
    England, if you look over the news articles, is having issues with fighting the Abyssal threat from every side, since they're an island. But it makes you wonder if South America's wiped out for anyone that didn't live on cliffs, now. As for the sword in the stone? They're at the same situation as they were for King Arthur, it seems. Wondering if Mordred should crash that party, and get her wish to try the test?

    Wolfen has alarmingly useful abilities for bargaining with deities. I definitely appreciate the depiction of Eris as being more responsible and considerate, it definitely seems accurate to what I've seen of her in Konosuba. Godafrid's depiction also seems quite apt.
    It's a "She remembers what happened in her, including how her father drew runes (That worked, no less!), and even how her parents carved runes into her, to put in the illusions. Japanese, Norse, a mix of both? It makes her rather useful for that sort of bargaining, though not nearly as well as her father. Eris was an utter pain in the ass to get down right, when I haven't seen the show, on the other hand. And Godafrid's depiction was written by Kieran for his reactions.

    The way the Konosuba deities are intervening in multiple concurrent realities feels really interesting. The Works operates at a much smaller scale, but the contrast is satisfying, somehow.
    Well, they're deities, Eris owes them a favor, and they do keep tabs on other deities. Eris just isn't evil, or a self centered brat. That doesn't mean that her bosses aren't possibly assholes, though. We just don't know enough to know more about them in Konosuba, so we can't exactly tell if they're simply intervening in the Konosuba series to keep their faith? Or if they're doing jobs like this for a much more massive setting, to keep things handled over multiple universes.

    All we really know is that Aqua's a shut-in young deity that loves anime and manga over her job, loves booze, and that Eris and "angels" exist in the setting.

    I'm keeping from making up deities wholesale from this, and altered it a hell of a lot from my first draft, to ensure that it would be simple, fit with what we know of things, and have simple explanations for everything.

    Choice of 10% critical chance vs choice-based activation is interesting. I presume we're dealing with enough individual rolls of the dice that 10% adds up quickly. I guess the other thing is that it gives more opportunity to get lucky, which, when you're blessed by the Goddess of Fortune, is something you can lean into.
    Makes rolling the dice for damage much, much easier, too.

    I do not know enough about Arpeggio of Blue Steel to comment much on Eris's intervention, or possible consequences, but that does explain the "and two more series" part.
    Suffice to say, Super Graviton Cannons? Are utter bullshit on the same level as a concentrated nuclear explosion in something closer to a massive laser beam of doom. As for more about it? You'll see it more next chapter. Partially because Zelretch has finally spotted what's going on.

    nitpicking non-Missouri things

    This sentence seems to have gotten worked over a few times, but now it's extremely redundant.


    This is... not good phrasing. Just "of your choosing" works okay, since "your" can be plural.


    I'm not sure what this sentence is trying to do. "If not why?" sounds like would fit with "ask if the trident is out of reach", but it doesn't work with "mention that". You could probably just drop the "If not why".


    That's not admits, that's "explains". "admits" has an entirely different connotation, Wolfen isn't trying to hide this information. The second time, with "But it all feels wrong" is a better usage, because that at least sounds emotionally painful, but it's not her secret, still. It seems weird that Wolfen is explaining that part when Hoppou is literally right there, but Wolfen is probably the more eloquent speaker. I feel like that might have been a good opportunity to have Hoppou talk, though.


    I think you're jumping speakers without line breaks on the first line, and it's a bit confusing. That needs a line break somewhere.
    Also, Wolfen's response here is a non-sequitur on several levels. Eris is asking "so the catch is that you're not giving me the info to do this myself? This seems it could be a better deal", and Wolfen's response is "look at how generous I'm being!", which... doesn't match the question. Also, "a buyer's market" means prices are low, and again, Eris is describing Wolfen as driving a somewhat hard bargain. And the line after, "Eris’s answering nod is the only reply Wolfen gets" it is entirely unclear who the speaker is, until you get to the next line for context. The character voices are not differentiated enough to get away with that.


    The folded arms and "admits" are at odds. Most "says" synonyms actually feel a bit awkward here, though. Just "Wolfen grimaces" into the next sentence is smoother, but I suspect there are better options. There are several more instances, which I'm not going to cover. Admits is versatile, but not this versatile. Similarly, chaining two "retorts" together back at

    feels messy.

    I also wouldn't mind a bit of formatting on the scene cut descriptions, like "With Eris". Admittedly that doesn't translate well from a word processor to forum without manual adjustment, but the way Kieran wraps them in italics is good for visually breaking things up.
    I'll change that stuff for the Eris part, thank you. Unfortunately, neither Kieran and myself caught that part in the pre-reading for the last part. And google documents wanted to focus on Aqua's issues, more than anything else at all. Blegh.
    I'm starting to suspect that talking with Kieran influences my rolls on Fate/Grand Order Heavily. How else can you explain me talking with him, then rolling for 30, only to get 3 Archer of Shinjuku on my second ten roll?

    I write like Douglas Adams. Proof: http://iwl.me/s/696f37bd

  7. #6787
    吸血鬼 Vampire
    Join Date
    Mar 2019
    Age
    28
    Posts
    248
    Quote Originally Posted by RanmaBushiko View Post
    Kancolle has a level up system. She went up 6 levels, and is paying 1/10th more legend per level to keep her things operational, as a result.
    Makes sense.


    Would you rather it be stuck in spoiler tags, and left for people to read? Or re-written as an interlude, for the Missouri part? It's very much necessary, and very much how politics can go when things start to truly go to hell in the world. Also, remember. This is set in 2013. That clusterfuck had to happen, if shipgirls were ever going to get rights, and the politicians of the world were going to ever realize that "No, they're women more than they are ships now, and they have their own thoughts, feelings, and enough firepower to kill us if we try to push them in a patriarchal oriented society".
    I see you have requested the thorough criticism. Very well.
    Entirely too much ranting about verisimilitude in a setting with shipgirls

    Thematic and meta-textual arguments first

    • This is the most absurdly heavy-handed strawman choice of moral non-dilemma I have ever seen. There is no subtlety here. There is no nuance here. There is just a cartoonishly evil side, and heroic opposition. There are some counterarguments that can be made about "necessity" and I'm going to demolish them, because there are many ways to do similar things that aren't nearly as ridiculous.
    • You chose to treat an extremely sensitive moral issue with flippancy. Describing "abortion pills" being put in every sort of food and drink trivializes it as a joke, and repeating it for effect continues that. That isn't how this sort of order would be implemented, and the absurdity of it can't realistically be interpreted in any way but as a joke.
    • Inverting the typical abortion debate by discussing enforced abortion, or sterilization, creates a huge amount of moral dissonance. It violates bodily autonomy even moreso than the anti-abortion position, which pairs poorly with being used for a cheap laugh. Thematically, you're saying "no one in the US cares about the issue of abortion on any sort of moral level", because this mortally offends both sides at the same time. While this may be a reasonable level of cynicism about politicians, it stretches suspension of disbelief.


    I will take a brief break here to say that you could approach this less offensively by threatening something like... coerced hysterectomy, or similar contraceptive procedure, before pregnancy, as they became aware of fraternization, just to prevent this sort of situation. These are still all morally horrifying, and invoke the same issues of bodily autonomy and consent, but can be treated seriously. "We're sneaking abortion pills into your food" is just tasteless. Also, these alternatives do a similar job of being paternalistically "we know what's best", but can also be reasonably spun to the public, and aren't nearly as likely to get shipgirls offended enough to kill you. They're more morally grey options, because they seem like reasonable and pragmatic ways to prevent this exact situation, which is political (and literal) suicide.

    Now the political:

    • This isn't even the role of the legislative branch. They don't have the legal authority to take this sort of action. You even call this out, that they aren't in the chain of command. They could pass legislation sent up from the House declaring shipgirls as having no rights (though that would probably get challenged in court immediately). They can't order around the military, they can't give themselves "emergency powers". Those would go to the President. That's the role of the executive branch, to make decisions quickly. The Senate is a SLOW branch of government.
    • If the Joint Chiefs of Staff and President refuse to enforce disciplinary actions, in a state of emergency, the Senate can't really do anything about it in the short term. There's no reason for soldiers to follow their orders.
    • If the Joint Chiefs of Staff and President are willing to enforce disciplinary action, there's no reason to go to the Senate. This is dereliction of duty, insubordination, or mutiny, and shouldn't go that high in the chain of command. This would be dealt with via court-martial. In a typical real-world case, this would result in dismissal and censure, but it's fairly obvious that in this setting, shipgirls are essentially "national weapons", and dismissal, summary execution, or censure aren't options because they are needed for combat.


    And world building:

    • It seems enormously unrealistic that this world treats shipgirls as non-persons. When did shipgirls first appear? How did they appear? It seems like they, and Abyssals, are relatively recent arrivals into this world, so there's not substantial reason for the world's culture to differ from ours before that divergence point. There is no sane world in which the US government encounters an enormously powerful, autonomous, intelligent being who is willing to help them, says "ah, you are a slave and non-person", and then intentionally pisses them off with no defensive measures. The balance of power is completely wrong. If every nation had something similar to the "Fleet brand" we saw before, which could be used to enforce compliance or something similar from the chain of command, this might make sense. But they don't, so it's just immersion-breakingly, cartoonishly stupid. You aren't disarming them, you aren't even doing something somewhat intelligent like the dead Japanese admiral by threatening their loved ones to neutralize them, you're just calling them over, while they're armed, and relying on their goodwill? Loyalty? for them to not kill you as you abuse them.
    • It's clear they recognize shipgirls are extremely powerful and important, because they're treated as national weapons.
    • It's clear they recognize shipgirls are autonomously intelligent, or they wouldn't bother to "hint"
    • On that note, the military does not "hint". The Senate does not "hint". "Are you not willing to follow the hints of the US Senate, for your own good?" is one of the most discordant sentences I have read in weeks. No politician would phrase it like that. It's undignified. By the time you would have this sort of hearing, there would be explicit orders in writing already. The admirals would have received orders to pass on, and the shipgirls would be reassigned. If the admirals weren't willing to enforce those orders, they would be the targets of discipline, which would be much more effective, because shipgirls seem to be emotionally attached to their admirals, and killing soldiers sent to arrest a mutinous admiral would at least happen at a safe distance for the politicians, if they absolutely insisted on forcing this sort of conflict (which I will reiterate, is stupid to do)
    • I'm vaguely annoyed that it's not known (or at least, not stated) if the offspring of shipgirls and humans are merely human, or possibly also shipgirl. I suppose at the moment the intensity of the conflict makes that a non-factor, but it would add a bit to the callousness of the government position, and highlight the pragmatism of it.


    So yeah, there are about half a dozen reasons off the top of my head why this should never happen this way. If I add some assumptions that haven't been shown in this setting, I can make some parts seem more reasonable, but others become even worse.

    Let's imagine that shipgirls become significantly more effective in combat, in a demonstrated way, when commanded by someone they have emotional attachment to. This incentivizes the military to promote fraternization (sexy admirals). This also has the obvious effect that the emotional state of shipgirls and their admirals would be considered paramount, so they would be given VIP treatment, not passed over and abused. This would also lead decision makers to immediately be concerned with proactive contraceptive measures, if pregnancy is predictable and also renders shipgirls not combat-ready.

    Even if there isn't massive direct combat benefit, but the military is just rationally considerate of the feelings of the sentient weapons that are choosing to help them, they would still have pregnancy concerns at an earlier stage. Of course, "being rationally considerate of the feelings of sentient weapons" is at obvious odds with what happens in this scene, and again, if the military chooses to do something during wartime, the Senate doesn't get to overrule them except through legislative process.

    If we instead suppose that the Senate has somehow done some sort of coup d'etat and now runs the government directly, I think that would be utterly ridiculous. They don't have the support of the military, evidently. They're the least decisive and least efficient body to make executive decisions available. Remember how last chapter, the Emperor in Japan is more important, because unitary executive power is useful for dealing with a crisis? This is the exact opposite of that.
    If the situation was that the JCS had overthrown the President and was ordering this, and the US is now a military dictatorship, sure, that's very reasonable, but then you're not dealing with the Senate, or "politicians", and the military would probably have a much more realistic threat assessment of the dangers posed by angry shipgirls.

    If the Senate has confirmed legislation stripping shipgirls of rights with a veto-proof majority, and has the support of the military in enforcing it, there is still no reason for them to have this direct confrontation, on so many levels. They're doing the equivalent of bringing a man to trial without any guard, not handcuffed, and carrying a fully automatic weapon plus some grenades, and telling them, in person, that they're being sent to a concentration camp. Why are we even patting down shipgirls for weapons? They evidently can't be disarmed! No. No. No realistic threat assessment would EVER DO THAT, and it absolutely destroys my suspension of disbelief.
    The only way that makes sense is if the military or executive branch just wants to wipe out this half the Senate, and is deliberately misadvising them about the level of danger to get them killed. Which... is plausible, particularly in 2013, but I had to contort myself so hard to find that possibility that I can't give it credence as being intended, and it would require considerably more foreshadowing to be remotely satisfying. It also has nothing to do with the stated reasons for the scene.

    It is around this point that I realize that I shouldn't be quite this level of annoyed, and this is probably has a very harsh tone. Sorry about that, but I really think that scene could be done better.

    In summary, I agree that if you want to make "shipgirls are not treated as people, and this is a conflict that would happen in this world" a thing, which seems realistic, a scene with those sorts of themes makes sense. As-written, I would rather that scene not exist except as a passing sentence describing the outcome, so that I don't have to think about how absurd it is. The themes are salvageable, though.

    As for the sword in the stone? They're at the same situation as they were for King Arthur, it seems. Wondering if Mordred should crash that party, and get her wish to try the test?
    That was what I was wondering, yes. It seemed very topical.

    It's a "She remembers what happened in her, including how her father drew runes (That worked, no less!), and even how her parents carved runes into her, to put in the illusions. Japanese, Norse, a mix of both? It makes her rather useful for that sort of bargaining, though not nearly as well as her father.
    That was more commentary than criticism, it just seemed amusing to me.

    [QUOTE]Eris was an utter pain in the ass to get down right, when I haven't seen the show, on the other hand. And Godafrid's depiction was written by Kieran for his reactions.
    I was wondering if you were collaborating on that one, that does make sense. Godafrid's level of dismayed resignation was perfect.

    Well, they're deities, Eris owes them a favor, and they do keep tabs on other deities. Eris just isn't evil, or a self centered brat. That doesn't mean that her bosses aren't possibly assholes, though. We just don't know enough to know more about them in Konosuba, so we can't exactly tell if they're simply intervening in the Konosuba series to keep their faith? Or if they're doing jobs like this for a much more massive setting, to keep things handled over multiple universes.

    All we really know is that Aqua's a shut-in young deity that loves anime and manga over her job, loves booze, and that Eris and "angels" exist in the setting.

    I'm keeping from making up deities wholesale from this, and altered it a hell of a lot from my first draft, to ensure that it would be simple, fit with what we know of things, and have simple explanations for everything.
    Since they're aware of several different universes fairly directly, it seems like they're acting in some larger setting. This does a great job of giving me that feeling of an overarching setting, which is weirdly really satisfying.

    Suffice to say, Super Graviton Cannons? Are utter bullshit on the same level as a concentrated nuclear explosion in something closer to a massive laser beam of doom. As for more about it? You'll see it more next chapter. Partially because Zelretch has finally spotted what's going on.
    I really enjoyed the "and Zelretch only cackles when Rin brings him up" aside from Shirou, that was GREAT.

  8. #6788
    死徒 Dead Apostle RanmaBushiko's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Near Seattle
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    730
    US Friend Code
    691,985,459
    Blog Entries
    10
    Quote Originally Posted by Arbitrarity View Post
    Makes sense.
    Yup. So she's going to have to balance out legend drain increase with leveling up to be strong enough to fight later threats.

    I see you have requested the thorough criticism. Very well.
    Yup, so it seems.

    Entirely too much ranting about verisimilitude in a setting with shipgirls

    Thematic and meta-textual arguments first

    • This is the most absurdly heavy-handed strawman choice of moral non-dilemma I have ever seen. There is no subtlety here. There is no nuance here. There is just a cartoonishly evil side, and heroic opposition. There are some counterarguments that can be made about "necessity" and I'm going to demolish them, because there are many ways to do similar things that aren't nearly as ridiculous.
    • You chose to treat an extremely sensitive moral issue with flippancy. Describing "abortion pills" being put in every sort of food and drink trivializes it as a joke, and repeating it for effect continues that. That isn't how this sort of order would be implemented, and the absurdity of it can't realistically be interpreted in any way but as a joke.
    • Inverting the typical abortion debate by discussing enforced abortion, or sterilization, creates a huge amount of moral dissonance. It violates bodily autonomy even moreso than the anti-abortion position, which pairs poorly with being used for a cheap laugh. Thematically, you're saying "no one in the US cares about the issue of abortion on any sort of moral level", because this mortally offends both sides at the same time. While this may be a reasonable level of cynicism about politicians, it stretches suspension of disbelief.


    I will take a brief break here to say that you could approach this less offensively by threatening something like... coerced hysterectomy, or similar contraceptive procedure, before pregnancy, as they became aware of fraternization, just to prevent this sort of situation. These are still all morally horrifying, and invoke the same issues of bodily autonomy and consent, but can be treated seriously. "We're sneaking abortion pills into your food" is just tasteless. Also, these alternatives do a similar job of being paternalistically "we know what's best", but can also be reasonably spun to the public, and aren't nearly as likely to get shipgirls offended enough to kill you. They're more morally grey options, because they seem like reasonable and pragmatic ways to prevent this exact situation, which is political (and literal) suicide.

    Now the political:

    • This isn't even the role of the legislative branch. They don't have the legal authority to take this sort of action. You even call this out, that they aren't in the chain of command. They could pass legislation sent up from the House declaring shipgirls as having no rights (though that would probably get challenged in court immediately). They can't order around the military, they can't give themselves "emergency powers". Those would go to the President. That's the role of the executive branch, to make decisions quickly. The Senate is a SLOW branch of government.
    • If the Joint Chiefs of Staff and President refuse to enforce disciplinary actions, in a state of emergency, the Senate can't really do anything about it in the short term. There's no reason for soldiers to follow their orders.
    • If the Joint Chiefs of Staff and President are willing to enforce disciplinary action, there's no reason to go to the Senate. This is dereliction of duty, insubordination, or mutiny, and shouldn't go that high in the chain of command. This would be dealt with via court-martial. In a typical real-world case, this would result in dismissal and censure, but it's fairly obvious that in this setting, shipgirls are essentially "national weapons", and dismissal, summary execution, or censure aren't options because they are needed for combat.


    And world building:

    • It seems enormously unrealistic that this world treats shipgirls as non-persons. When did shipgirls first appear? How did they appear? It seems like they, and Abyssals, are relatively recent arrivals into this world, so there's not substantial reason for the world's culture to differ from ours before that divergence point. There is no sane world in which the US government encounters an enormously powerful, autonomous, intelligent being who is willing to help them, says "ah, you are a slave and non-person", and then intentionally pisses them off with no defensive measures. The balance of power is completely wrong. If every nation had something similar to the "Fleet brand" we saw before, which could be used to enforce compliance or something similar from the chain of command, this might make sense. But they don't, so it's just immersion-breakingly, cartoonishly stupid. You aren't disarming them, you aren't even doing something somewhat intelligent like the dead Japanese admiral by threatening their loved ones to neutralize them, you're just calling them over, while they're armed, and relying on their goodwill? Loyalty? for them to not kill you as you abuse them.
    • It's clear they recognize shipgirls are extremely powerful and important, because they're treated as national weapons.
    • It's clear they recognize shipgirls are autonomously intelligent, or they wouldn't bother to "hint"
    • On that note, the military does not "hint". The Senate does not "hint". "Are you not willing to follow the hints of the US Senate, for your own good?" is one of the most discordant sentences I have read in weeks. No politician would phrase it like that. It's undignified. By the time you would have this sort of hearing, there would be explicit orders in writing already. The admirals would have received orders to pass on, and the shipgirls would be reassigned. If the admirals weren't willing to enforce those orders, they would be the targets of discipline, which would be much more effective, because shipgirls seem to be emotionally attached to their admirals, and killing soldiers sent to arrest a mutinous admiral would at least happen at a safe distance for the politicians, if they absolutely insisted on forcing this sort of conflict (which I will reiterate, is stupid to do)
    • I'm vaguely annoyed that it's not known (or at least, not stated) if the offspring of shipgirls and humans are merely human, or possibly also shipgirl. I suppose at the moment the intensity of the conflict makes that a non-factor, but it would add a bit to the callousness of the government position, and highlight the pragmatism of it.



    Let's imagine that shipgirls become significantly more effective in combat, in a demonstrated way, when commanded by someone they have emotional attachment to. This incentivizes the military to promote fraternization (sexy admirals). This also has the obvious effect that the emotional state of shipgirls and their admirals would be considered paramount, so they would be given VIP treatment, not passed over and abused. This would also lead decision makers to immediately be concerned with proactive contraceptive measures, if pregnancy is predictable and also renders shipgirls not combat-ready.

    Even if there isn't massive direct combat benefit, but the military is just rationally considerate of the feelings of the sentient weapons that are choosing to help them, they would still have pregnancy concerns at an earlier stage. Of course, "being rationally considerate of the feelings of sentient weapons" is at obvious odds with what happens in this scene, and again, if the military chooses to do something during wartime, the Senate doesn't get to overrule them except through legislative process.

    If we instead suppose that the Senate has somehow done some sort of coup d'etat and now runs the government directly, I think that would be utterly ridiculous. They don't have the support of the military, evidently. They're the least decisive and least efficient body to make executive decisions available. Remember how last chapter, the Emperor in Japan is more important, because unitary executive power is useful for dealing with a crisis? This is the exact opposite of that.
    If the situation was that the JCS had overthrown the President and was ordering this, and the US is now a military dictatorship, sure, that's very reasonable, but then you're not dealing with the Senate, or "politicians", and the military would probably have a much more realistic threat assessment of the dangers posed by angry shipgirls.

    If the Senate has confirmed legislation stripping shipgirls of rights with a veto-proof majority, and has the support of the military in enforcing it, there is still no reason for them to have this direct confrontation, on so many levels. They're doing the equivalent of bringing a man to trial without any guard, not handcuffed, and carrying a fully automatic weapon plus some grenades, and telling them, in person, that they're being sent to a concentration camp. Why are we even patting down shipgirls for weapons? They evidently can't be disarmed! No. No. No realistic threat assessment would EVER DO THAT, and it absolutely destroys my suspension of disbelief.
    The only way that makes sense is if the military or executive branch just wants to wipe out this half the Senate, and is deliberately misadvising them about the level of danger to get them killed. Which... is plausible, particularly in 2013, but I had to contort myself so hard to find that possibility that I can't give it credence as being intended, and it would require considerably more foreshadowing to be remotely satisfying. It also has nothing to do with the stated reasons for the scene.

    It is around this point that I realize that I shouldn't be quite this level of annoyed, and this is probably has a very harsh tone. Sorry about that, but I really think that scene could be done better.


    Yeah, I agree on your points here. To be honest, there weren't that many ways I could play this, without it being either the CIA fucking up massively, or the Good Ol' Boys club of the rich trying to ensure shipgirls serve them. Still, I'll wipe it and save it for a possible Interlude once this eventually goes to it's own thread.

    So yeah, there are about half a dozen reasons off the top of my head why this should never happen this way. If I add some assumptions that haven't been shown in this setting, I can make some parts seem more reasonable, but others become even worse.
    Agreed. Writing that in was hellishly hard, and I went over a lot of different options. Botched CIA operation? They've got the history for it, but I can't see them trying to fuck with any shipgirls in the setting. Especially not an Iowa class battleship like Missouri, or Arizona herself. They're still the only hard hitters they have right now. So even if they've messed up in some pretty crazy ways in the past, I can't see them going "full on suicidal".

    In summary, I agree that if you want to make "shipgirls are not treated as people, and this is a conflict that would happen in this world" a thing, which seems realistic, a scene with those sorts of themes makes sense. As-written, I would rather that scene not exist except as a passing sentence describing the outcome, so that I don't have to think about how absurd it is. The themes are salvageable, though.
    *Drums my fingers, thinking* Well, I suppose some spoilers are in order to explain this part, I suppose.

    An Explanation
    Therein lies my issues, and the heavy-handedness of the Senate. It's some of the most horrifying shit I thought they'd be able to try without getting kicked out of their jobs. But considering most of the rich I've met through my father's painting job, back in the early 2000s, all were "There's a problem? There aren't supposed to be problems. Go fix it." to us? I can't really see the really powerful and rich actually giving up if something's gone wrong with their plans.

    Passing legislature when the entire country loves Arizona and Missouri? Hard as hell. Convincing their old buddies to start dosing them with shit? Still hellishly hard but approaching something closer to realistic, if they called in favors en-masse for it to possibly work.

    Also, keep in mind, most of the countries of the world have just finished going through a month long war from every side of the country that has oceans. Europe is being literally raided by starving Abyssals wanting something to eat besides fish, in enough numbers that they've literally burned most of London to the ground. To the point where Arthur, or Arturia, or whatever version of the "Once and Again King of England" that existed in this universe, has the possibility of showing up, just because things are that desperate.

    France isn't exactly much better off, nor is most of the rest of the coastal countries of Europe.

    Convincing old friends that Arizona needs to stop being at the side of things, so they can get her back to the fighting and help fight the enemy at the gates is slightly more reasonable as a result of that. Convincing the Mafia or whatever else they pulled in, to help? It lowers things to "barely doable", I think.

    Now, the other branches of the government letting them "get away with it" long enough for them to be wiped out for being a club of "Good Ol' Boys" that don't care about anyone but the rich, and ensuring that the details of "The rigging is a part of them, and can't be felt on pat down!" doesn't get out?

    That made things twist to a lot more sense, if barely.

    Also, politicians overreaching like this has been an actual, horrifying, thing in the past. Look up the attempted coup reported by a famous general or admiral, back in the early 1900s. You'll realize exactly how close we were to having a second civil war. And George W. Bush's own grandfather got away with being one of the people involved with trying to convince the retired fellow to attempt a Coup.


    Irregardless, I'll wipe it from the chapter, and leave it in my Google Documents page for if I ever decide to rewrite it, or you want to help with fixing it.

    That was what I was wondering, yes. It seemed very topical.
    You'll have to wait and see, I'm afraid. *Chuckles*

    That was more commentary than criticism, it just seemed amusing to me.
    I was wondering if you were collaborating on that one, that does make sense. Godafrid's level of dismayed resignation was perfect.
    Yup, I thought people would enjoy that.

    Since they're aware of several different universes fairly directly, it seems like they're acting in some larger setting. This does a great job of giving me that feeling of an overarching setting, which is weirdly really satisfying.
    And I'm honestly glad to hear that. It means we got that chunk down right.

    I really enjoyed the "and Zelretch only cackles when Rin brings him up" aside from Shirou, that was GREAT.
    Yeah, Zelretch isn't quite done with Erik yet. Especially considering that Erik promised to fix so very much stuff for him at the beginning of Anarchy. You really think he doesn't prank Erik every so often, now? You'll get to see more of him next chapter, as well.
    Last edited by RanmaBushiko; December 19th, 2020 at 09:30 AM.
    I'm starting to suspect that talking with Kieran influences my rolls on Fate/Grand Order Heavily. How else can you explain me talking with him, then rolling for 30, only to get 3 Archer of Shinjuku on my second ten roll?

    I write like Douglas Adams. Proof: http://iwl.me/s/696f37bd

  9. #6789
    吸血鬼 Vampire
    Join Date
    Mar 2019
    Age
    28
    Posts
    248
    Quote Originally Posted by RanmaBushiko View Post
    Yeah, I agree on your points here. To be honest, there weren't that many ways I could play this, without it being either the CIA fucking up massively, or the Good Ol' Boys club of the rich trying to ensure shipgirls serve them. Still, I'll wipe it and save it for a possible Interlude once this eventually goes to it's own thread.
    I appreciate you taking that seriously. It took me a few do-overs to get it to a state where it wasn't totally hostile-sounding, because my default argumentative style would have gotten too close to flaming, I think, and I didn't want to do that.
    Well, I suppose some spoilers are in order to explain this part, I suppose.
    Responses

    This is the fun part where we have to go over what parts of this have been previously shown in the setting, and was something I was trying to keep in mind when writing my rant.
    "There's a problem? There aren't supposed to be problems. Go fix it."
    I will agree that this is a thing, but that's where they would be delegating to the military chain of command via subpeona. That's the Admiral's job to deal with, or his commanding officer, etc, and that is the exact sort of process the Senate would use in this situation.

    Passing legislature when the entire country loves Arizona and Missouri? Hard as hell.
    This seems plausible, if we make the assumption that things have already gotten to this point. It seems at odds with smugly declaring them non-citizens, because that IS the story that would get out, and the political fallout from that seems roughly equivalent to passing unpopular legislation (that will likely be struck down by any court in an instant)

    Convincing their old buddies to start dosing them with shit? Still hellishly hard but approaching something closer to realistic, if they called in favors en-masse for it to possibly work.
    This part was mostly about tone, honestly. The way it was written, it's a gag, and it is in stark contrast with the serious subject matter, which causes mood whiplash. It's just gratuitous levels of moral outrage, over-the-top puppy-kicking. If you roll back the timeline a little, you could just make this about "hey, we hear you're fraternizing with your commander, get an IUD"... except you've already established the pregnancy several chapters back, and they know about it. That does put you in a bit more of a corner. Interestingly, when I read about that in previous chapters, I was assuming that they were trying to breed more shipgirls.
    Still, that would set up this theme much earlier. If you're making it an entire interlude, you could set that up over a few time-skips, which could work out.

    Now, the other branches of the government letting them "get away with it" long enough for them to be wiped out for being a club of "Good Ol' Boys" that don't care about anyone but the rich, and ensuring that the details of "The rigging is a part of them, and can't be felt on pat down!" doesn't get out?

    That made things twist to a lot more sense, if barely.
    That is what I ended up concluding from the situation, the problem is that there was not enough setup to satisfyingly imply it. You did have the "Senate session only has people supporting this", and the wink from the VP, but it needed a bit more to show that's what was going on (the level of cartoonish villainy does not incline a reader to try and read into it further). It also somehow... warps? the theme you're going for, because that's a very sinister thing for the supportive side of the government to be doing, and I feel like that would need to be highlighted more.
    For the military to not be concerned about combat-readiness to that degree (not enforcing fraternization regulations, no "hey use protection guys", no mandatory contraception), implies that this is a several-month conspiracy with several moving parts to use the shipgirls as pawns to kill half the Senate (presumably the obstructionist half, given it's 2013). That's Revenge of the Sith levels of Machiavellian scheming to ascribe to the Obama administration, and it seems more likely they'd just declare martial law (given the crisis) and put the Senate out of the picture, if they were being uncooperative. That's not to say that you can't set that up, it just makes the world seem even more hellishly dystopian, which might be what you're going for.

    Also, politicians overreaching like this has been an actual, horrifying, thing in the past. Look up the attempted coup reported by a famous general or admiral, back in the early 1900s. You'll realize exactly how close we were to having a second civil war. And George W. Bush's own grandfather got away with being one of the people involved with trying to convince the retired fellow to attempt a Coup.
    Ah, the Business Plot. That's kind of an outlier among attempted coups, honestly. They at least had some degree of public support, and some military force reportedly available, though it still seemed far-fetched. That amount of preparation seems much less plausible in 2013, given the scope of national intelligence agencies, and public/military support seems non-existent. Also, this feels like a much smaller (and undignified) hill to die on, because it's not an ideological difference (COMMUNISM!), but a specific policy one that can be addressed through normal procedure, albeit slowly.

    Also wait, does this board have a ban on political discussions? Probably better to take this to PM if that's the case. I didn't find anything specific looking at the rules, but we're in some territory that is entirely too close to reality for many forums I've been in.


    Yeah, Zelretch isn't quite done with Erik yet. Especially considering that Erik promised to fix so very much stuff for him at the beginning of Anarchy. You really think he doesn't prank Erik every so often, now? You'll get to see more of him next chapter, as well.
    Excellent.
    Last edited by Arbitrarity; December 19th, 2020 at 01:11 PM.

  10. #6790
    Jester of the Moon Cell's Sovereign Kieran's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    According to most, my own little world
    Age
    41
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    8,075
    Blog Entries
    194

    Out of Order (Part II)

    Somewhere else
    Unknown time









    Darkness—but, within that darkness, a sense of something lighter, moving within it; much like the sun, when seen behind closed eyelids. And a voice, feminine but somehow off, with a timbre not quite human . . .

    “—Start, confirmed. Connection, established; credentials verified. Welcome back; a pleasure to see you. Hello, welcome—as always, I’ve kept you waiting for quite a while, Master.”

    “Master?” The term was familiar . . . Or was it the voice? Did he know this person?

    . . . Yes to the first, uncertain to the second. It was familiar, but to call him “Master?” It didn’t sound like Arturia, Artoria, or any variation of her name and vocal range that any of the analogues of her he’d dealt with used . . .

    “This is the Spiritron World SERIAL PHANTASM,” the voice continued. “Abbreviated as SE.RA.PH and built within virtual space, it is Tsukimihara Academy.” There was a brief pause. “Excuse me, but regulations require me to scan your data values . . .”

    Some of this sounded familiar, but it was primarily confusing. Enough of what he was being told sparked recognition, but not enough to bring out details—it was like remembering the information was somewhere in the book, but not the page number.

    . . . Why was this happening? And why did it feel like he was halfway between waking and dreaming?

    Pulsing lights and sounds that wouldn’t have been out of place on a science-fiction program interrupted what little thought process he had, followed by an electronic screech and hiss of static, as the darkness turned to a dull, amber light. This prompted another set of statements from the mysterious voice.

    “My apologies,” the voice intoned. “Errors have been detected in your data values, indicating that the file or connection has been corrupted. Attempt repairs?”

    A screen of sorts appeared before him, dotted with symbols that looked Asian, before an eye-blink at the sudden brightness the screen provided resolved the characters into English letters.

    “Yes” was an easy choice, really—

    “Repair attempt in progress . . .”

    —though, had he known how painful it would be, he would’ve seriously reconsidered . . . He had some means of accessing that screen, even if he couldn’t quite make out what, so presumably he had hands—unfortunately, he seemed to lack the mouth or lungs necessary to scream . . .


    “Repairs successful,” the voice announced, after an eternity of agony in enforced silence. “Label: Archivist. Category: Administrative authority (data analysis), special access. Quality: C++ . . . Confirmed. Now then, I will load your records from the Other Side.”

    There was another flash, followed by an electronic screech and hiss of static, as the darkness turned to a dull, amber light.

    “My apologies,” the voice intoned. “There was a failure in record access. ‘Your name’ is a required field. ‘Your heart’ is a required field. ‘Proof of existence’ is a required field. Please enter your name, gender and contracted Servant once more.”


    “Gender” was easiest—“male” was entered immediately. After a moment’s thought, a name swam to mind, and he entered that as well (noting that his hands had become both visible and clearly male hands in the process). Spotting an entry for “nickname” in addition, he paused and contemplated it briefly.

    “Frid,” he decided, entering the name as he spoke it, before hitting the final confirmation.

    Once the screen holding that data disappeared, a second one came up, with the words [Running compatibility algorithm, please wait . . . Match found.]

    “Confirmed,”
    the voice said cheerfully. “Thank you for your patience, Mister Frid.”

    Why did that bright, happy tone suddenly fill him with dread?

    “Good day,” it continued, blithely oblivious to his thoughts. “Now then, have a safe trip.”

    At those words, the world suddenly went white—and “dread” swiftly gave way to “panic” . . .








    Tsukimihara Academy
    Unknown time later









    The simulation, it had to be admitted, was remarkably detailed. Even lacking experience with this specific environment to give her the appropriate context, those elements that were familiar—the feeling of wooden desks, the echo of footsteps along tiled halls—all rang true to her sense-memories. The newer sensations—the blue of the sky, the smells of a summer breeze as it wafted through the open air—could likewise be assumed to be similarly accurate.

    It wasn’t the real thing—but it was the closest simulation possible. And with that in mind, perhaps it was no surprise, then, that Mash Kyrielight chose to sequester herself on the school’s rooftop, where she could watch the clouds roll by . . .

    Of course, if questioned about it, she would answer that her present position was because the rooftop was a tactical vantage point through which she could view a majority of SE.RA.PH.’s exterior environment. However mutable the design, its current configuration as a school restricted every potential Master to a single point of entry; therefore, what better place could there be to accomplish her objectives . . .?

    The first objective, of course, being scouting out her potential competition in the “Holy Grail War Ritual” the Moon Cell had devised, for some reason—the current theory was that it was some form of defence mechanism restricting access to its inner workings. The second objective given to her was a last-minute addition to the Rayshift experiment, but it was considered no less urgent: locate and enable the retrieval of Olga-Marie Asmleit Animusphere.

    Mash frowned. As should be expected when dealing with magi families (at least, according to her knowledge), the Animusphere head had been terribly sparse on details surrounding his daughter’s situation. They disliked cooperating with anyone, as a rule, and while Animusphere was better in some regards on that front than his peers—as the current project proved—there were apparently limits to his willingness to be open and frank. And by and large, Mash would be content to let him have his secrets; indeed, few others she could think of would care, at least insofar as it impacted the girl in question.

    Indeed, if she was operating under any other authority, Mash knew from her own experience, the girl’s fate would likely be considered utterly irrelevant . . . But her master had a kinder heart than one might expect of an Atlas alchemist (which Mash also knew from her own experiences, and quite well) and so, the request had been passed on that Mash keep an eye out for the girl, at least.

    One broken family is more than enough for me . . .”

    It was, in some ways, a very unreasonable request; considering that the girl was supposed to be a first-rate magus, and therefore fully capable of altering her appearance in SE.RA.PH, once she’d broken through the first firewall represented by the overlay—Mash had, of course, done so within the first “day” here. Despite that, however, she had decided not to change her look; officially, this was to catch her opponents off-guard—if they didn’t realise that she was a (potential) Master, then she might gain valuable intelligence they wouldn’t let slip if they knew that she wasn’t an “NPC” . . .

    But unofficially, she kind of liked the uniform. It was different from what she wore at Atlas, but familiar enough to be comfortable.

    Staring at the stream of “students” below, she wondered aloud, “How many of them are simulations, do you think? And how many are real?

    . . . Even if her Servant knew the answer, of course, actually telling Mash would be a violation of the rules—not just in giving away system-classified data, but in materialising to speak at all in “public” before the War’s actual beginning. Which was a pity; under other circumstances, Mash might have enjoyed the potential philosophical debates that could be had over what might be meant by “real”—but they would have to wait until she returned to “My Room.”

    As it was, she found herself oddly preoccupied by the question, despite its rhetorical nature. She’d been informed that while the majority of SE.RA.PH’s inhabitants were generated by the Moon Cell itself, others (presumably, her opponents in this “War”) were actual humans—and Mash was very keen on seeing if she could spot the difference. So far, she’d had no luck; whether that was because of the quality of the simulations, though, or the scarcity of humans in this place, she couldn’t be sure.

    The simulations may just be that good, she admitted to herself. After all, the Heroic Spirits certainly seem up to par—and while he’s not inhuman at all, I still can’t imagine there being an actual person like that “librarian . . .”








    Tsukimihara Academy Library








    Frid sneezed abruptly, and glared at the general vicinity, feeling somehow insulted—and seeing no one in the immediate area, he settled for scowling at the ceiling, knowing that the universe was making fun of him, somehow . . .

    “Have you decided, Master?” his Servant asked, drawing him from his ruminations—which, he admitted, was probably more the point of the question than the answer itself.

    “Not yet,” he admitted. “There are advantages and disadvantages to both choices—and I can’t quite decide which set outweighs the other . . . But we still have time.”

    He stared thoughtfully at the screen, which patiently displayed the choice before him.



    [Change status to “Holy Grail War competitor”]
    [Option will expire in 02:17:30:59]
    [WARNING! Clicking “Yes” will result in the suspension of your administration privileges for the duration of the operation. Do you wish to proceed?]

    [YES] [NO]



    “. . . For now, anyway.”












    Quote Originally Posted by Arbitrarity View Post
    I was wondering if you were collaborating on that one, that does make sense. Godafrid's level of dismayed resignation was perfect.
    Well, thank you.



    I really enjoyed the "and Zelretch only cackles when Rin brings him up" aside from Shirou, that was GREAT.
    I agree!
    “Love will be cruel to who it entices — love will have its sacrifices.”

    — Carmilla Theme




    "Evil isn't the real threat to the world. Stupid is just as destructive as Evil, maybe more so, and it's a hell of a lot more common. What we really need is a crusade against Stupid. That might actually make a difference."

    ―Jim Butcher, Vignette

  11. #6791
    死徒 Dead Apostle RanmaBushiko's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Near Seattle
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    730
    US Friend Code
    691,985,459
    Blog Entries
    10
    Chapter 10: Fallout


    The Moon Cell

    Zelretch frowns, sitting. “Now, what was so important that I was called here to check with my Administrator access? The last time Hakuno asked for me like this, I made him into a magical girl for a month, in retaliation, so he should know better than to do this unless it’s important. Though, I suppose that now this Moon Cell has a slight tap to the Kaleidoscope as a result. It definitely makes it easier to use it to process data from universes outside ones where Servants and Dead Apostles exist for me without cementing the timeline into place.” He muses, as he sits down. “Ah, developments with that Shipgirl setup that Erik’s flying fortress now has. I wonder if he’s realized that she’s missing from his ship yet, or that if she dies, his ship will die with it?”

    “Hmm. Arpeggio of Blue Steel? An interesting crossover, if canon to Kantai Collection. Let’s see now. Moon Cell, can you calculate the most likely outcomes for Wolfen and her actions, without further intervention?”

    Three screens appear, as Zelretch watches carefully. “An Aerial Battleship base, much like herself, as the first, more than two nuclear weapons for the second, and warp drive for the third?”

    Curiously, he pulls up the first, watching carefully how the Moon Cell has calculated the fighting that will likely occur.

    Zelretch’s frown deepens immediately, watching the Mental Model Kongo putting a massive hole through the Aerial Battleship, like a hot knife through butter. The last moments of Wolfen, as other ships launch hundreds of missiles that simply carve massive gouges out of the ship, is just a side effect.

    “That’s… not impressive, I’ll admit. Though she had nukes built for it, the sheer size alone left it too vulnerable to Kongo and her Black Fleet.” Zelretch muses, watching carefully. “Bringing every Abyssal and shipgirl that Wolfen could only make them tightly concentrated and easy to kill.”

    A pause, as Zelretch narrows his eyes. “However, the fact that the Mental Models don’t recognize Wolfen’s Aerial Battleship as possible upgrades in any way, shape or form is concerning. Let’s check the next one, and see if that continues.”

    Wolfen flies in near orbit with Hoppou on her back, this time, as a mass of shipgirls and Abyssals all fire at the five mile mark Wolfen had warned them to stay at, prior. Down immediately below, the Mental Model of Kongo stands on her ship, massive tori-gate like mechanisms recreating a battleship that had just been sunk 13 minutes prior. Nearby, the Mental Model of the Heavy Cruiser Maya watches the massive storm of water a mile wide with awe and glee.

    “We need you NOW, Wolfen! We can’t fight another one of those absurd Battleships off!” Kongou shouts on the screen, as Wolfen flies high above.

    “I need 39 more minutes, damn it, then we’ve got this in the bag!” Wolfen retorts.

    “That Mental Model of my own ship is mass producing them, Wolfen! You know that better than anyone! Will you really let us sink as your only friends, just so we have a chance to save humanity but not us?!” Kongou’s retort leaves Wolfen silent.

    “...Understood. Warn people further off, I’ll start my assault.” Wolfen orders.

    With those words, she aims her railgun down, fully charged, and fires a nuclear round off.

    INCOMING!” Is the scream from Maya as she desperately spots things, and opens fire desperately as she pushes herself in the way of the incoming round.

    For a minute, they watch as the explosion clears, all sides quiet.

    Then, to no little horror, Wolfen stares at a damaged Kongou, a fully functional Mental Model of the Battleship Ise beside her, looking at Maya dissolving in no little horror. The only actual emotion she’s shown the entire time she’s been in the universe.

    “Tch.” Wolfen murmurs, before firing the railgun a second time, her second nuke heading down like the first.

    This time, Battleship Ise is the one sacrificed, leaving Kongo’s Mental Model glaring at the sky when the explosion dissipates. Around her, the shattered 3d printing system for the Fleet of Fog ships falls, shattered and useless.

    “This is Wolfen. Whatever she was using is done, but Mental Model Kongo is still standing! I repeat! STILL STANDING!” Wolfen snarls over the communications system… only to widen her eyes as Kongo looks straight at her.

    Emotionless, Mental Model’s guns aim right at Wolfen, and then she’s in for a fight for her life, the cloaking not working at all to Kongo’s advanced computers.

    Shattering the Waveforce armor with the Radiant Wave surger eventually works, letting Kongo and Wolfen duke it out in melee, as Hoppou helps.

    But it’s not enough.

    Not shooting out Kongo’s engines, by using a Legion of Coal unit.

    Not going into melee, as Kongo summons massive swords of energy and uses them almost as well as a Servant would.

    The battle is a curbstomp for Wolfen and Hoppou both, as Kongo breaks them. Piece by piece. Limb by limb.

    At the last, Wolfen glares at Kongo, body shattered. Hull massively compromised. Nanomaterial slowly flooding her internals, forcing her offline, inch by inch. Hoppou’s half dead body lies nearby, as Wolfen struggles to pull herself up for one last stand.

    Then the timer runs to zero on the last nuke’s creation, and Wolfen grins.

    “If I’m going down, I’m taking you with me!” With those as Wolfen’s final words, the third and final nuke goes off, leaving nothing remaining of Hoppou, Wolfen, or the Mental Model of Kongo.

    Zelretch’s frown grows deeper, as he watches carefully, thinking over every possible issue.

    “They don’t care about other technology, they don’t care about innovation and tactics. They’re like machines, even worse than canon. Did someone mess with the setup for them to cross dimensions? More than that, where did that Battleship, Ise come from?” Zelretch mutters, thinking. “The crossover event had it be Iona, Takao, Haruna, Kirishma, Maya and Kongo. There were never any other ships involved. Well, except that Nagara class as cannon fodder.”

    For a moment, Zelretch looks completely unamused, as he simply ponders things. “It’s not funny at all, or even slightly amusing. I half expected to see Yamato show up, if nothing else than to save Chihaya Gunzou from his death, but she doesn’t seem to care for him, either. Considering who her second Mental Model is, it goes from ‘unamusing’ to ‘terrifying’ for the implications involved, too.”

    “I suppose I should spare Hakuno the dress, for bringing this up. Perhaps a Kaleidostick for Nero and Tamamo instead?” Zelretch muses to himself, as he thinks, before pausing to rewind some of the footage.

    “No sign of any usual catchphrases from the crossover, manga or anime for the Fleet of Fog? Perhaps this is more worrying than I thought.” He eventually admits, before settling back to watch the third and final outcome.

    Then stares, silently.

    “Well, I’ll give her this. She makes me think that her father was perhaps a more sane and rational person to work with than she is.” Zelretch watches with a bit of amusement on his face. “I wonder if I should give her a Kaleidostick just for having the guts to think of something like this?. It’s definitely entertaining if nothing else.”

    As Wolfen literally rides down an asteroid she’d brought over via her warp drive system, to colony drop the Fleet of Fog warships.

    The looks of utter shock from the Fleet of Fog in its entirety, as the asteroid, one side covered with as much jets and other equipment as it could possibly hold, heading towards the Fleet of Fog? A beautiful scene indeed, leaving Zelretch outright chuckling at the looks on their faces.

    The sheer mass, being undamaged by the Gravity Cannons, by being a 1 kilometer sized asteroid?

    The two nuclear warheads that Wolfen launches is just icing on the cake, as the fleet she’d spent so much time to gear up against, dies from the asteroid and the ocean compressing the explosion.

    Then Zelretch’s eyes narrow, as Wolfen’s look of joy at her victory, turns to utter despair.

    Because they saw the same thing, at the same time. Hundreds more Fleet of Fog ships appearing out of nowhere, to finish the fight that Kongo’s fleet had failed to win.

    “So, that’s it. The deities involved are sore losers, and want to ensure that there are as many Mental Models as are necessary for their eventual victory.” Zelretch muses. “If my guess isn’t off the mark, they’re doing something to mess with their heads upon summoning, as well, forcing them to be hyper focused. Perhaps it's influencing their programming somehow, considering they're hyper intelligent AI?” Zelretch frowns, as he starts to research.

    “Admittedly, Wolfen not taking advantage of more esoteric methods, might have something to do with how poorly she failed for those first two fights. I wonder if I can stack the deck with that somehow?” Zelretch muses, then rubs his chin as he stares at the results involving the Mental Models of the Fleet of Fog.

    “Altering what the Admiralty Code says in its laws. Their highest law, being altered like that would do it.” Zelretch finally admits to himself, his frown now etched upon his face. “If it wasn’t for Erik in a time loop? Or what I owe him for dealing with that clusterfuck the Greater Grail War turned into on top of that? I wouldn’t mess with something like this mess. But I suppose I owe him for handling Dracula and sending that irritating would be vampiric lord back to his home universe. Stupid Dark Lords, stepping in like that.”

    Zelretch pauses, then chuckles to himself. “At least Erik’s always fine with all the pranks I play on him now.”

    With a flicker of power, Zelretch disappears.

    A few minutes later, Hakuno would be found staring at both Nero and Tamamo, both using Kaleidosticks, grinning at him while asking him which of them is the most beautiful.

    A slow turn between them, as they start glaring, Then arguing. Before the mother of all cat fights breaks out between them for weeks on end.

    “Did he have to actually prank me for helping him?!” Hakuno slumps in his seat, rubbing his forehead.

    Then a stray blast of Kaleidoscope-infused energy sends him flying.




    Deck of the Fog Ship Yamato




    “So, do you have any idea of how to ensure we have an edge to keep your Fleet from being influenced by my bosses?” Eris asks, thinking. “Or an idea for me to give luck to, that they won’t be influenced so badly?”

    “Perhaps I-401 and her crew would work out for this.” Yamato admits, both bodies relaxing in nanomaterial made chairs on her deck.

    A ripple of power on the deck later, has Eris going bone white. Slowly, she turns to look, before desperately moving to hide behind Yamato. “Oh no, what is he doing here?!

    “Ah, the one that granted a boon to Wolfen.” Zelretch smirks. “Glad I left a good impression after what I did to your organization the time that blue haired idiot tried to steal my sword and give it to some poor dead fool.”

    “The talking sticks haven’t come back to haunt me?” A quiet whisper from Eris is her only reply.

    “Not unless you decide to irritate me, no.” Zelretch smirks. “I can be serious from time to time too, you know?”

    Slowly Eris moves back from behind Yamato, then turns to look at both mental models. “Meet the indisputably most dangerous trolling prankster of the multiverse. Zelretch. Unlike most of them, he has access to every timeline and universe out there, leaving him able to come and go as he pleases. Add in that he’s immortal, and Aqua now weeps about horrifyingly fat and ugly guys trying to hit on her, every time his name is said?”

    “Oh, making sure she’d meet Baron Harkonnen was entertaining, I’ll tell you that for sure. Especially since I ensured she’d show up at his family reunion!” Zelretch’s smile never wavers. “The only fatter bastard I’ve ever seen was Jabba the Hutt, after all. And it stayed in the family quite nicely, to her horror.”

    After that, Zelretch’s smile disappears. “Still, enough about that. I’ve come to influence things a bit, and ensure things are set up to be more safe and sane than what would happen otherwise.”

    Eris pales, as she recognizes the reference to the first Dune book, immediately. Yamato’s eyes narrow for both Mental Models, instead.

    “How bad will it be, then?” One of Yamato’s Mental Models ask, carefully.

    “Considering they’ve figured out how to influence what the Admiralty Code’s laws are for you and your fellow ships?” Zelretch asks, frowning. “Unless you particularly like the idea of executing Chihaya Gunzou in cold blood, not even caring that you killed him, or trying to save him?”

    Both of Yamato’s mental models go white, as they look at each other, then back at Zelretch.

    “Oh, crap.” Eris whispers. “That shouldn’t even be possible!

    “Considering how much can be influenced about people, if it happens while dropping into another universe? Unless you have Paradigm shielding when you go in, or something similar…” Zelretch pauses, then smirks. “Of course, considering Wolfen has the ability to make something similar to my Paradigm Shielding as armor, it isn’t exactly hopeless. Add in that her technology has some advantages compared to yours, if just as many disadvantages?”

    “What would she ask for in return?” Eris asks, since the twin Yamato mental models are saying absolutely nothing for the moment, one still looking like she’s in utter shock.

    Zelretch thinks. “Perhaps upgrades, like what your Fleet of Fog has? Her current weaponry hits hard against supernatural threats, but leaves nearly nothing set aside for anything like one of your ships.”

    “Who would you suggest sending, to ensure that we aren’t manipulated?” Yamato finally asks.

    For a moment, Zelretch thinks, drumming his fingers against his knee. “As much as I’d suggest someone easier to sideline? Kongo, Flagship of the Black Fleet. She has the sort of stubbornness that you’re going to need for to find a way through things, and the willingness to adapt that would be necessary for dealing with Wolfen, and getting the technology you all so desperately need to not be victims in the future.”

    Yamato’s eyes narrow. “You’re going to have to explain that.”

    “Hyuuga is out, and not just because I-401 sank her months ago.” Zelretch admits. “Haruna and Kirishima aren’t adaptable enough to be useful for this, as of right now. Nagato would be too powerful for Wolfen to really get along with, and Ise would be a little too sister focused to really help.”

    Zelretch pauses, his fingers drumming on the nearby railing, as he thinks. “You’re far too overpowered and necessary for here, to really help long term. I-401 would use her technology against you whenever possible, and simply doesn’t have the reserves of nanomaterial to really make a difference in the long run. Really, anything less than a battleship would be useless for being a proper ally in such things, to Prototype Aerial Battleship Wolfen. The only one that would fit, and have the ability to produce technology for Wolfen to use? Is Kongo, especially if she’s armed with her flagship equipment for 3d printing other Fleet of Fog ships.”

    Eris quietly blinks, while both mental models of Yamato stare, quietly contemplating things.

    Then, resolutely, the Yamato Mental Models nod as one. “So then. I’ll summon Kongo, and we’ll set things up.”

    “I’ll give you time to set things up, though I’d suggest we work together in having her Mental Model in one place, and both her battleship, extra nanomaterial, and the flagship equipment set up in orbit.” Zelretch smirks. “A Super Graviton Cannon from orbit as a tactical strike is more useful than the locals freaking out, after all.”

    “What of defenses against mental effects from the local deities?” Eris asks, quietly. “If they notice her, I suspect these plans will be in ruins.”

    “I’ll handle that personally. A paradigm shield for one person is far simpler than for an entire nation, and won’t be too draining for my reserves.” Zelretch pauses, then smirks. “Unless you think I should simply give her a Kaleidostick, and let ‘Magical Girl Mental Model Kongo’ become a thing?”

    Eris shakes her head rapidly. “Please, I don’t think I can handle another one of those talking sticks!”

    “You wouldn’t have anything to do with them?” Zelretch raises an eyebrow.

    “I still keep thinking I’m hearing one whenever I’m taking a shower, taking pictures!” Eris shudders. “Not to mention exactly how much they kept trying to get pictures when there were so many at first!”

    Both Mental Models of Yamato pause, simply staring at Eris, before the more human looking one of the two shudders quietly.

    “I suppose that’s entirely fair to be worried about one taking pictures of you when you’re in the shower. I’d say let’s not give her one of those, please?” She admits, before sighing.

    “As for you, little copy of a human that Yamato made her Mental Model based off of.” Zelretch speaks up. “You should be especially worried, with the plots these deities seem to have made. They seem entirely too eager to see Chihaya Gunzou die, after all, and you all act like machines once more.”

    A slow nod from both Yamato Mental Models is his answer, as a ripple of rainbow light forms around him, before he disappears.

    For a long moment, Eris, and the Mental Models of Yamato both look at each other.

    “Upgrades for Wolfen, hmm?” Eris finally settles back to think. “I wonder if she’d rather be a Mental Model entirely, or if she’d trade different technologies for your own?”

    “You think over ideas for trades we might have to do, since I suspect you know about the bulk of our technologies, while I summon Kongo.” Yamato retorts, voices in sync. A moment’s pause, before the more human one speaks up. “Though, I’d suggest checking the shower vents, or the shower head, if you’re hearing pictures being taken. If they’re sticks, maybe they’re in one of those two? Or the drain? Or maybe it’s a coworker taking pictures of you, and making it seem like it’s one to draw away your attention?”

    Eris pauses, outright frowns, then starts to go red with rage. “If it’s one of those stupid angels trying to sell nudes of me again, claiming that they bring ‘Good Luck’? I’m going to kill them.”

    Yamato nods, then focuses. “Kongo, Akashi. New orders for the both of you. Come to my location immediately. We have a future threat you’re to take care of, Kongo, and Akashi’s the one necessary for producing the equipment for the trip. Ise, take over for Kongo as flagship until they return. No hunting for your sister while in charge, understand? We still have yet to find her, and maintaining the patrols is more important.”

    Three choruses of “Understood!” ring in Yamato’s mind, as she settles back to wait.

    “Can you tell me anything of Wolfen’s technology while we wait?” Yamato eventually asks. “Or should I prepare tea?”

    “I suppose it's possible to make some images of battle footage of Wolfen.” Eris says with a sigh.




    With Erik, Location Unknown, ??? Months after Fate Anarchy (Before the Saber Alter Sidestory, however)




    Erik sighs, wiping the sweat off his forehead, as he looks at the desert around as far as the eye can see. “Stupid post apocalyptic place is just unpleasant.” He admits after a bit. “Let’s keep on working, folks! It’ll take time to get the Wolfen rebuilt into something smaller, I know! But we can do it!”

    A cheer rises from the Legion of Coal, as they continue their work.

    Then a ripple of light appears behind Erik, and Erik twists. “Ah, Erik. How’s that Command Spell Creation machine working?”

    “We’ve just got about that finished, thanks. I’ve got a couple more hours of work into it, before I can fire it up.” Erik admits, then pauses. “Not here to prank me again? Or Mordred?”

    For a moment, a portal appears above Erik’s head, spreading confetti on Erik.

    “That better? If I’d known you wanted to be pranked, I would have done something better than that.” Zelretch smirks, as Erik’s glare grows a bit.

    “I just cleaned this floor, too!” Erik sighs, softly. “What do you want?”

    “Oh, just decided to let you know that you need to aim the Command Spell Creation machine to your ship, before you aim it at yourself.” Zelretch smirks.

    Erik pauses, then slowly turns to look up from the confetti to Zelretch. “And why, exactly, do I need to do that?

    “Funny story, really.” Zelretch’s smirk only widens. “You recall the chunk of the Wolfen that you lost?”

    Erik nods. “Oh, I definitely do, considering how badly damaged the rest of the ship was!” Erik mutters, under his breath.

    “Well, funny story.” Zelretch continues. “The shrine your wife made for the Kami of your ship was sucked out with, and the few Legion of Coal units daisy chained themselves to retrieve it mid-dimensional jump. That wouldn’t have mattered so much, except for where they eventually wound up.”

    Please, tell me it wasn’t somewhere like Transformers, or that bullshit Arpeggio of Blue Steel.” Erik sighs.

    “Not quite as bad as there. Ever heard of Kantai Collection?” Zelretch is openly grinning now.

    Erik puts one face in his palm, quietly. “Oh god, she became a shipgirl, didn’t she? The Kami of my ship is a shipgirl now, isn’t she?”

    “Oh, right on the money! Except there’s a bit of an interesting, if thorny, issue coming along soon. There was an Arpeggio of Blue Steel crossover event in the game, after all.” Zelretch admits.

    “Oh, shit.” Erik mutters. “By Odin’s Beard, this is going to be bad, isn’t it?”

    “Quite. Seems like the local deities don’t like the Abysssals or shipgirls running around.” Zelretch admits. “Moreover, they’ve decided to ensure that every shipgirl and Abyssal, worldwide needs to be… shall we say, dealt with?

    Erik frowns. “That’s why I moved to Mars! To avoid divine politics!” Erik starts swearing, vehemently.

    “Quite right, I’m afraid.” Zelretch admits. “Furthermore, they’ve decided to ensure every possible Fleet of Fog ship is available in case the first group gets wiped out, rather than playing it to the in-game event.”

    “Shit. That’s…” Erik trails off, eyes narrowed as his frown deepens. “She doesn’t have a chance, does she?”

    “She’ll make a good showing of it, if we can’t derail their plans.” Zelretch admits, with a smile. “However, if she can manage to get a Servant, I think we’ll give her time to work out better methods than doing an asteroid drop and firing nukes to finish off a fleet, before dying to hundreds more.”

    Erik slowly nods. “I’ll set it up for Wolfen to get some, though it’ll take longer until she’s topped off. Maybe a month to give us one each, rather than 2 weeks?”

    Zelretch nods, and smiles.

    “What are you doing here?” Mordred asks from behind.

    “Oh, ensuring you don’t have a sudden death to your ship, leaving you all stranded between universes, helplessly suffocating to death!” Zelretch smirks at her. “I don’t want that sort of fate to happen to you, after all!”

    Mordred stares, blinking, before Erik puts his face in his palm once more. “This is all so I keep working on repairing your stuff, isn’t it?”

    “Oh, definitely. That doesn’t mean I don’t owe you for things you’ve done in the past that kept me from tearing my hair out, though. Like that Yggdmillennia Castlevania incident.” Zelretch nods at them both, before disappearing in a flash of rainbow light.

    For one long moment, Erik and Mordred both stare at where Zelretch was, before Erik sighs. “Welp, gotta go deal with adjusting the Command Spell Creation machine that’s nearly done. Again. Mordred, could you tell my wife that she doesn’t have to bother with finding the Shrine to the Wolfen, and needs to make a new one? It apparently went with the chunk of the ship that’s missing, and is now part of a shipgirl in a Kantai Collection universe.”

    “Oh, right!” Zelretch’s voice comes from behind them, leaving them jerking in shock to see a tiny rainbow hole in reality. “You’ll be happy to know that that ring you made for Mordred appears on every version of her, now. Even the version that’s serving as little shipgirl Wolfen’s captain, in that universe!”

    “What the hell?!” Mordred just stares. “I’m going to have to see whatever series you’re talking about, aren’t I?”

    “Yup. Mind telling my wife now? I have more work after all.” Erik asks, nicely.

    “No problem!” With that, Mordred runs off.

    Erik sighs, then looks at his mechanical left arm, quietly, flexing it. After that, he pulls himself up and gets back to work, humming as he does so.




    Somewhere in Japan, with Wolfen and Hoppou




    “Wow. That was surprisingly easy!” Hoppou admits with a smile. “They just had it in that vault place, hidden underground!”

    “Like they wanted it well sealed away? I noticed that, too. Though the defenses coming online towards the end, with all those Indiana Jones style traps was a bit more irritating, I think.” Wolfen admits, chiming in with a smile. “Still, to think they faked the destruction of the stone Tamamo no Mae was sealed in, and replaced it with a fake so long ago?”

    “Hoppou’s rather impressed!” Hoppou says with a big smile. “But Hoppou is also rather glad that we didn’t get stuck in that deadly gas trap. You might be able to hold your breath for long periods of time, Wolfen, but Hoppou can’t!”

    The petulant pout on Hoppou’s face ends, when Wolfen pulls her in for a hug.

    “Now, now, Hoppou. It’s safe. We’re fine. And you could have teleported after me at any time, you know?” Wolfen says with a smile.

    “Eh? We’re fine? What about that scratch mark on the back of your right hand, then?” Hoppou asks, curiously.

    “Scratch mark? What scratch mark?” Wolfen pauses, then looks. “Huh. Looks more like a rune, honestly. Or maybe the Command Spells that Daddy had?”

    The sound of clapping interrupts them.

    “Eh?!” Wolfen turns, then pauses. “Oh, you’re that Zelretch fell- wait! IS DADDY OKAY?! DO YOU KNOW IF HE GOT HURT WHEN I WAS DAMAGED?!

    “They’re just fine, Wolfen. Congratulations on getting as far as you have. And you’re right. Those are Command Spells, even if you didn’t start with them. The regeneration machine for Command Spells, ripped off from Chaldea’s own setup, works just fine it seems. Just as I hoped from giving him tips to restore them, also granting new ones.” Zelretch says, a smug smile on his face.

    Wolfen tilts her head, staring at Zelretch carefully. Then she carefully nods. “It’s not like I could hurt you if you wanted to do me ill.”

    “That right there is the mark of someone truly wise. To know when you face someone you can’t possibly win against.” Zelretch smirks. “Of course, making sure people won’t fight me? It just isn’t as funny as when I ensure that's the case by pranking them into submission!”

    “Hoppou doesn’t know who you are. Wolfen? Who is this?” Hoppou asks, tilting her head.

    “He helped out Daddy a lot, with some things? Daddy also works to repair his stuff now and again. I can’t really say who would win between them, if Daddy was at full power, but as he is now? I think Daddy would lose.” Wolfen admits.

    “It’s not like your father could stop a moon from killing him if it was dropped on him in a colony drop, as I have.” Zelretch admits, his smile never fading.

    Hoppou stares, wide eyed, before looking at the moon high in the sky, then at him. “Oh.” She whispers in a tiny, tiny voice.

    Zelretch nods, a smile on his face. “Now, Wolfen? I’ve been keeping some tabs on you for Erik, though he didn’t quite realize you existed until today. I can probably help you out more than I have, in a couple of ways, if you wish, though merely in tips, or suggestions. Most of my work has been to ensure the Mental Models you’ll eventually be facing are aware of the setup, and ensuring the one they’ll send for eventual work to counter the situation will be here safely.”

    Wolfen pauses, thinking. “So you’ve been helping out a lot? Thank you!”

    “Anything you’d like to ask for, that’s small in nature?” Zelretch asks, somewhat amused.

    “My armor is utter shit compared to whatever eldritch stuff Abyssals use, my weapons can sink only the little ones easily. Well, aside from the Radiant Wave Surger, that is. And I’ve noticed a disturbing trend of them getting stronger and stronger, past my maximum damage limits.” Wolfen folds her arms, thinking, as she works things out. “Would you have any suggestions?”

    “I could suggest ideas from Erik, either for Radiant Wave Surgers or freezers under your hull, but that wouldn’t work in the long run.” Zelretch muses. “Really, your best bet is making a deal with the Mental Model that will be coming your way soon, for things like that.”

    Hoppou outright blinks, eyes wide at how Wolfen’s insulting herself, then gives Wolfen a close hug.

    “On top of that, it’s hard to think, focus, concentrate, or design things for others to use. Mordred’s the only one that thinks for me in a human way, and it makes it difficult.” Wolfen admits, thinking.

    “I’m not able to bring over any crew for you, you know. That would be murder.” Zelretch admits, a bit of a glare in his eyes, now.

    “No, no! Nothing like that! I’m just speaking verbally about my thought process here!” Wolfen admits.

    Zelretch simply nods, arms folded, as the smile resumes on his face.

    “As useful as I suspect a Kaleidostick would be to ask for, I don’t think it would work on someone, or something like me. So equipment is out.” Wolfen frowns further, thinking, then nods. “A copy of Daddy’s database, if you please, as well as sending over a copy of my database back over, so Daddy can get what’s going on so far.”

    “That’s doable, I suppose.” Zelretch muses, nodding. “Anything else?”

    “Would you have suggestions for ideas on how to kill a… Mental Model, you called it? Without having to use nukes?” Wolfen asks, quietly.

    Zelretch muses, obviously thinking, even rubbing his chin as he paces for a bit..

    “Short range likely will work if you can get the jump on them, middle range just won’t hit hard enough. The only thing I can think of is long range. Have you tried railgun rounds with a Radiant Wave Surger on the end? You aren’t likely going to get off with being cloaked while firing more than once, what with it glowing red as it heads towards your target, but I suspect that’ll be close to the class you’re aiming for.” Zelretch finally admits.

    Wolfen slowly nods, thinking. “Would you have any other suggestions for me?”

    “Look into the supernatural side of things to win, and try to summon a servant with the rock you’ve got there.” Zelretch retorts. “It’ll be draining, exhausting, and wear you down if you actually use one in battle, but if you can find relics, or supernatural things to help supplement yourself, you might have a better chance of victory in the long run.”

    “Thank you!” Wolfen admits. “Ah, could you tell me about the Mental Model lady?”

    “I thought two versions of the Battleship Kongou would be rather more bongo than one, honestly.” Zelretch smirks.

    “Hoppou thinks you just set it up that way for the joke.” Hoppou admits, staring at Zelretch carefully.

    Zelretch nods, with a smirk, before the smirk widens. “And voila! One database for you to copy!” With his words, a ripple of rainbow light appears next to him. Through it, Wolfen can see a database, her parents nowhere to be found nearby.

    “Leave a letter for your parents, your Uncle Scylla isn’t connected to the database right now.” Zelretch admits. “They’re busy with rebuilding your ship, minus the parts that wound up in you, and setting up a new shrine for you.”

    Wolfen nods, and pushes a link cable into the database, before pausing, pulling out a drone, and using it to take a picture of her and Hoppou together as well.

    “Dear Mommy and Daddy, Mordred, Uncle Scylla, and Uncle Fenris,

    Hi, it’s the Kami of PAB Wolfen! I’m a shipgirl now!

    I kinda had to eat the rest of my hull for the lost section, to be in tune enough to stay as the shipgirl, though. Sorry? I know that the version of Meteorite Iron for my hull is super ultra scarce, so I feel really bad about it!

    Kongou has been a wonderful friend, and helped with me and my stuff a lot, even helping me repair myself after both halves of my keel got separated. Still trying to find an engineer to fix that, by the way.

    Unfortunately, it looks like there’s going to be a small apocalypse come Christmas, involving Arpeggio of Blue Steel and Railgun nukes, according to that goddess Aqua who we met earlier.

    She scared my captain, by the way. Oh, speaking of! Mordred’s my captain now! And is super nice!

    I wish I could cuddle with her, but the best I can do is manifest her at about 2 inches tall. All my mecha comes out superdeformed, too! It’s kind of irritating, honestly, considering how I know you love the stuff.

    Zelretch informed me to be more spiritual, and summon a Servant! Hopefully I do you all proud!

    Soon as the database finishes copying, I’ll likely lose the ability to write more. Keep in mind that I love all of you! Very very much!

    Oh, Mordred says hi, by the way, and the ring works well, even if she only gets dregs of it. She’s also not exactly a Servant, either. Just… more like a fragment of one? It’s kinda odd.

    Well, the copying of my database to yours, and yours to mine is nearly done, so I’d better finish this off.

    Please find us in this universe soon?

    Love Always from your Daughter and Niece, Wolfen”

    Wolfen sighs, getting ready to pull the jack out, before Zelretch coughs behind her. “Done then?”

    Wolfen looks back, nodding, then blinks at the line going slack in her hands. “That’ll give them some dimensional frequencies to work off of, to eventually find you in the future.”

    “Got it. Thank you for your help!” Wolfen says, smiling.

    “Why, of course! Now, for the payment I’ll be taking from you for helping you out with these ideas? I demand you do pranks for me.” Zelretch smirks.

    “Pranks?” Wolfen asks, carefully.

    “More specifically, pranking those deities to ensure they won’t have the ability to set up computers, runes and all that sort of stuff, to send hundreds of Fleet of Fog ships to slaughter you all.” Zelretch’s smirk only grows bigger.

    “Like what, exactly?” Wolfen asks, carefully.

    To her confusion, Zelretch simply pulls out a poster. Carefully, Wolfen unrolls it, then stares.

    “Ceiling Kaleidosticks say that the photoshoots shall continue until the main computers for the super secret projects are destroyed!” Wolfen carefully reads to herself, then looks at two Kaleidosticks, armed with cameras.

    “Put it over Eris’ bed come, oh… between April 23rd and April 28th, for best effect.” Zelretch grins. “Those two don’t want her to forget them, after all.”

    “Hoppou thinks Eris must have pissed you off in the past.” Hoppou admits.

    “Really, it’s more that Aqua earned my ire, by trying to get her grubby little hands on my sword.” Zelretch admits. “But those two fell in love with Eris and her looks.”

    “Now, to get Kongo and bring her here. I’ll be back in a while, to help you summon a Servant, hmm?” With those words, Zelretch disappears in a flash of rainbow light.

    Author’s Notes: Man, this took a lot to write.

    Balancing humor with unpleasantness in the near future was a pain, but considering Zelretch is Zelretch, he’s going to do what Zelretch does. Prank and generally mess with everyone.

    Eris, as you can tell, is rather traumatized by the last time her pantheon tried to fight Zelretch, and failed miserably.

    Arpeggio of Blue Steel’s Yamato’s going through an existential crisis, as of right now.

    Erik’s irritated.

    Wolfen’s confused, and wondering why Zelretch wants her to prank people like that.

    Speaking of Erik, I’d thought about saving the “big reveal” of him having a mechanical arm sometime in the future, for the Saber Alter sidestory. But it’s not really that big of a deal.

    Finally? Instead of us getting one of the “heroes” for the Arpeggio of Blue Steel, instead? We get one of the most impressive, and downright terrifying Antagonists for that series, Kongo, or Kongou. To make it easier, and to make a difference, I’m going to be calling her Kongo and leaving the shipgirl as Kongou, so I don’t have to deal with “Mental Model” or “shipgirl” for every time I reference one of them. As for why, exactly, she was so damn terrifying? She was involved as the main antagonist for most of the series of the manga. From chapter 1 to around chapter 70, she was THE antagonistic force to be paranoid of, and fight.

    Good think she drinks tea, or else they’ll have nothing to relate to, hm?

    You might wonder why I’ve chosen to go this route? So I don’t have to work myself into knots trying to figure out how to make a fight between her and Wolfen be interesting without it being an utter goddamned curbstomp for Wolfen. The first three options for the fight Zelretch saw, was literally my working out how that fight would go and just going “unless there’s an Act of God, Wolfen’s fucked”. There is simply no way Wolfen could tactically crush Arpeggio of Blue Steel’s own Kongo, not with the sheer amount of reinforcements the manga version can pull up. Goddamned broken 3d ship printer that she can be when she wants is just… utterly broken.

    Let’s not even go into the route she took in the anime, hm? If you think the manga is insane just for that skill alone? The anime is worse.

    Sorry for getting into a bit of a rant there. Just been getting more and more tired of trying to figure this out, while binge reading the manga, watching the anime, and working out how either Wolfen or Kongo would possibly tip the scales against each other. This entire chapter is one massive solution to that utter clusterfuck of a plot of “Nope, everyone dies if they fight the Fleet of Fog!” to deal with.
    Last edited by RanmaBushiko; December 23rd, 2020 at 02:28 AM.
    I'm starting to suspect that talking with Kieran influences my rolls on Fate/Grand Order Heavily. How else can you explain me talking with him, then rolling for 30, only to get 3 Archer of Shinjuku on my second ten roll?

    I write like Douglas Adams. Proof: http://iwl.me/s/696f37bd

  12. #6792
    吸血鬼 Vampire
    Join Date
    Mar 2019
    Age
    28
    Posts
    248
    So we're continuing Olga's trip to the Moon and adding Godafrid and Mash (not Heroic Spirit Mash, just regular timeline Mash), nice.
    I am VERY confused by
    But her master had a kinder heart than one might expect of an Atlas alchemist
    from Mash. This might make sense for Rani, but I don't think Mash has anyone she works for who's from Atlas. Marisbury is Head of Astromancy at the Clock Tower, not an alchemist.

    She also has an unspecified Servant. I'd typically expect Galahad for obvious reasons, but that seems likely to be too... boring? Achilles and Bradamante come to mind as other shield-wielders, but you've obviously left it completely open right now.

    Godafrid also has a Servant while in an administrator position, which seems very unusual. The Moon Cell does not seem to know what to do with him. It's also very unclear what his objectives are at the moment, because we haven't actually seen his direct perspective while he's in full posession of his faculties yet.

    and while he’s not inhuman at all, I still can’t imagine there being an actual person like that “librarian . . .”


    Switching...

    collecting nitpicks

    Though, I suppose that now this Moon Cell has a slight tap to the Kaleidoscope as a result, means it’s easier to use it to process data from universes outside ones where Servants and Dead Apostles exist, especially if I’m here and involved.”
    This is a bit too much "tell" on the "show, don't tell" scale. The outcome to be explained is that Zelretch can use the Moon Cell to estimate things outside of the universe it exists in, but he's literally Zelretch, that's his thing, you don't need a backstory for it.

    Moon Cell, can you calculate the most likely results of Wolfen and her actions, if things aren’t intervened further?”

    A more natural phrasing might be "without further intervention". I feel like "most likely outcomes for Wolfen" might also be cleaner here, because something seems off.

    The deities involved are sore losers, and want to ensure that it’s as many Mental Models as possible.
    First sentence is a bit confusing about what "it" is. "Will use as many Mental Models as necessary" probably gets that across.

    “If my guess isn’t off the mark, they’re doing something to mess with their heads upon summoning, as well, forcing them to be hyper focused. Or maybe altering the programming in a minor or major way?”
    Too many "or" in the second sentence, and altering programming seems like more a means to "messing with [the] heads" of AI, than an alternative explanation. You could make the second sentence something like "Perhaps altering their programming?"

    Glad you have a good memory of me for what I did to your organization the time that blue haired idiot tried to steal my sword and give it to some idiot
    Too many "idiot" in this sentence, and the early sentence construction is also a bit tortured. "Glad to see I left an impression after (etc)" might work okay.

    “Of course, considering Wolfen has the ability to make something similar, it isn’t exactly hopeless. Add in that her technology developed for her has some upgrades compared to yours, if just as many downgrades?”
    I assume the first references paradigm shielding. "her technology developed for her" is... awkward. Also I feel like this is not the correct use of "upgrade" and "downgrade", those are usually reserved for directly comparable things. "Advantage" and "disadvantage" is more appropriate.

    “I suppose I can pull up battle footage of her fighting.” Eris admits.
    Redundancy is heavy here. This isn't the worst use of "admits", but I'm more conscious of seeing them now.

    Of course, making sure people won’t fight me isn’t as funny as if I ensure they won’t fight me by pranking them into submission!
    I don't quite understand what Zelretch is trying to say here. I could see something like "the best way to ensure people won't fight me is pranking them into submission", but as it is, I feel like the two halves of the sentence are at cross-purposes.


    Zelretch is doing a lot of plot facilitation here, though he probably did something similar behind the scenes in Anarchy, if the homunculus IOU is anything to go by. I'm a bit surprised he's come into direct conflict with the Konosuba gods, even if it's just over their appropriation of his artifacts.

    Erik's scene is kind of the highlight of this chapter to me, becuse he has the most distinctive "voice" as a character.

    Given the Legend expense of having a Servant for Erik, I'm unclear on how Wolfen will be able to "afford" sustaining a Servant, if 1.6 Legend per day is too much for her, unless they have the most ridiculous level of Independant Action or Independant Manifestation (or she finds a ton of external sources to cover it)
    Ceiling Cat memes. Zelretch is fiendish.

  13. #6793
    Jester of the Moon Cell's Sovereign Kieran's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    According to most, my own little world
    Age
    41
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    8,075
    Blog Entries
    194
    Quote Originally Posted by Arbitrarity View Post
    So we're continuing Olga's trip to the Moon and adding Godafrid and Mash (not Heroic Spirit Mash, just regular timeline Mash), nice.

    Yup - the muse decided that this needed to be done before I dug in on the holiday idea. Now, if I can keep it from poking at the next Anarchy chapter instead . . .


    I am VERY confused by

    from Mash. This might make sense for Rani, but I don't think Mash has anyone she works for who's from Atlas. Marisbury is Head of Astromancy at the Clock Tower, not an alchemist.
    This is all very true. However, it is also true that Atlas was responsible for developing a lot of Chaldea's technology; and as the methods Marisbury is using here are different (i.e., the Moon Cell), would it not follow that his methods for employing them are different, as well? After all, he'd hardly have the money for a "designer baby" in this timeline . . .


    She also has an unspecified Servant. I'd typically expect Galahad for obvious reasons, but that seems likely to be too... boring? Achilles and Bradamante come to mind as other shield-wielders, but you've obviously left it completely open right now.
    *Blinks* And I'd not considered either of them (though either could be hilarious, on top of interesting) - thank you.


    Godafrid also has a Servant while in an administrator position, which seems very unusual. The Moon Cell does not seem to know what to do with him.
    At the moment, it appears he's been granted one as a "terminal" - it seems the Moon Cell expects that, despite his inherent authority, he'll need the "help function" turned on in order to use it.

    . . . Well, it is a supercomputer, after all; I suppose that level of insight is only to be expected, no?


    It's also very unclear what his objectives are at the moment, because we haven't actually seen his direct perspective while he's in full posession of his faculties yet.
    And thus far, things are very confusing for him, as well - because this may be Tsukimihara Academy, but it's certainly NOT matching what he remembers of the games it appears in . . .


    I'm strange enough to normal people (though I honestly doubt the very concept of them, myself); to a sheltered cinnamon roll like Mash . . .?
    “Love will be cruel to who it entices — love will have its sacrifices.”

    — Carmilla Theme




    "Evil isn't the real threat to the world. Stupid is just as destructive as Evil, maybe more so, and it's a hell of a lot more common. What we really need is a crusade against Stupid. That might actually make a difference."

    ―Jim Butcher, Vignette

  14. #6794
    死徒 Dead Apostle RanmaBushiko's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Near Seattle
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    730
    US Friend Code
    691,985,459
    Blog Entries
    10
    Quote Originally Posted by Arbitrarity View Post
    So we're continuing Olga's trip to the Moon and adding Godafrid and Mash (not Heroic Spirit Mash, just regular timeline Mash), nice.
    I am VERY confused by

    from Mash. This might make sense for Rani, but I don't think Mash has anyone she works for who's from Atlas. Marisbury is Head of Astromancy at the Clock Tower, not an alchemist.

    She also has an unspecified Servant. I'd typically expect Galahad for obvious reasons, but that seems likely to be too... boring? Achilles and Bradamante come to mind as other shield-wielders, but you've obviously left it completely open right now.

    Godafrid also has a Servant while in an administrator position, which seems very unusual. The Moon Cell does not seem to know what to do with him. It's also very unclear what his objectives are at the moment, because we haven't actually seen his direct perspective while he's in full posession of his faculties yet.


    It's interesting, isn't it? He has some very interesting plot points.

    Switching...

    collecting nitpicks


    This is a bit too much "tell" on the "show, don't tell" scale. The outcome to be explained is that Zelretch can use the Moon Cell to estimate things outside of the universe it exists in, but he's literally Zelretch, that's his thing, you don't need a backstory for it.


    [/FONT]A more natural phrasing might be "without further intervention". I feel like "most likely outcomes for Wolfen" might also be cleaner here, because something seems off.


    First sentence is a bit confusing about what "it" is. "Will use as many Mental Models as necessary" probably gets that across.


    Too many "or" in the second sentence, and altering programming seems like more a means to "messing with [the] heads" of AI, than an alternative explanation. You could make the second sentence something like "Perhaps altering their programming?"


    Too many "idiot" in this sentence, and the early sentence construction is also a bit tortured. "Glad to see I left an impression after (etc)" might work okay.


    I assume the first references paradigm shielding. "her technology developed for her" is... awkward. Also I feel like this is not the correct use of "upgrade" and "downgrade", those are usually reserved for directly comparable things. "Advantage" and "disadvantage" is more appropriate.


    Redundancy is heavy here. This isn't the worst use of "admits", but I'm more conscious of seeing them now.


    I don't quite understand what Zelretch is trying to say here. I could see something like "the best way to ensure people won't fight me is pranking them into submission", but as it is, I feel like the two halves of the sentence are at cross-purposes.
    I'll fix that later. Family's coming over in 45 minutes to take me out for Christmas light viewing. Thankfully with us all wearing masks, etc.

    Edit: For Nitpick number 1, however? We've established that if Zelretch actually looks at a timeline, he cements it into being, as part of Fate Anarchy Canon (pretty sure we figured this was canon itself, to Zelretch, and derived things from there), as well as him having administrator access to the Moon Cell. Note Kieran's first bit for Fate/Anarchy on parts of this.

    Thus, we had to have a reason for him to be able to have the Moon Cell see into Type Moon universes at all, rather than just the universe it's in. Kinda is necessary on that point.

    Yes, it's his shtick, but why would the Moon Cell be able to derive things from his shtick so easily? Hopefully that makes sense.

    Otherwise, from what Kieran and I both get from this? He'd have cemented those three fights as "the only canon" ending to this story. I don't know about you, but I don't want to write "Mental Model Kongo and her Black Fleet UTTERLY CURBSTOMPS EVERYONE, The End." for this. You know?

    Edit 2: Still, I edited things to make this facet more clear. Hope that reads better.

    Zelretch is doing a lot of plot facilitation here, though he probably did something similar behind the scenes in Anarchy, if the homunculus IOU is anything to go by. I'm a bit surprised he's come into direct conflict with the Konosuba gods, even if it's just over their appropriation of his artifacts.
    You know you've fucked up somehow when he's personally getting involved to wreck your plans.

    Erik's scene is kind of the highlight of this chapter to me, becuse he has the most distinctive "voice" as a character.
    Glad you enjoyed it.

    Given the Legend expense of having a Servant for Erik, I'm unclear on how Wolfen will be able to "afford" sustaining a Servant, if 1.6 Legend per day is too much for her, unless they have the most ridiculous level of Independant Action or Independant Manifestation (or she finds a ton of external sources to cover it)
    That's going to be be a major plot point set, I think. Can't just handwave it away and claim that the "Thanatonium engines of the Fleet of Fog produce Legend" or something like that. No, that would be going too damned far even for the crazy that Erik built.

    Honestly? Add in that for the Fleet of Fog, there's no legend involved, except "World War 2 era battleships" with the Fleet of Fog itself. The Admiralty Code, the primary directive of the Fleet of Fog, on the other hand...

    Spoilers for the Admiralty Code
    That "being" or whatever she actually is, makes me wonder if she's an eldritch abomination wearing a human suit. Edit: Maybe someone else would get other ideas, like her being the reincarnation of the Admiralty Code, but considering how she acts? Or brings up that the law she enforces is over 4.1 billion years old?! I'd say eldritch abomination wearing a human suit, myself.


    Ceiling Cat memes. Zelretch is fiendish.
    Yes, yes he is. *Chuckles* And considering exactly how terrified Eris is of the Kaleidosticks already...
    Last edited by RanmaBushiko; December 23rd, 2020 at 02:30 AM.
    I'm starting to suspect that talking with Kieran influences my rolls on Fate/Grand Order Heavily. How else can you explain me talking with him, then rolling for 30, only to get 3 Archer of Shinjuku on my second ten roll?

    I write like Douglas Adams. Proof: http://iwl.me/s/696f37bd

  15. #6795
    死徒 Dead Apostle RanmaBushiko's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Near Seattle
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    730
    US Friend Code
    691,985,459
    Blog Entries
    10
    Chapter 11: Wherein Plans are Thoroughly Derailed


    Japan, near the hiding place of the actual Sessho-Seki Stone

    Wolfen silently kneels, studying the stone that her mother was sealed within, ears still attentive for the return of Zelretch. “The Sessho-Seki stone… I wonder if the version of Mommy that’s in this universe lies within?”

    “Hoppou doesn’t know.” Hoppou admits, quietly.

    “Well, the legend supposedly had it spewing out poison gas. I wonder if it’s drained, or this version of Mommy simply… quit?” Wolfen thinks, before letting out a Legion of Coal unit to tap on the rock. Moments later, her eyes narrow, as she thinks, pulling up her Compass.

    For a moment, Wolfen focuses her hardest, on her need for her mother to be there with her, hugging her, and having her mother with her. The compass wavers at the Stone, like it’s involved, yet not.

    Then Wolfen frowns, focusing on her need for the version of her mother to be released, and watches the compass spin around like there’s no answer.

    “...She’s either dead, or as good as, and this is all that remains of her power.” Wolfen finally admits, with a sigh. “I might be able to absorb it, and gain some of her abilities, considering how much Mommy did to build me. It might even let me produce Kitsune crew members! Or, I could use it as a catalyst for summoning a Servant, and leave it drained dry as a result. What would you suggest, Hoppou?”

    “Are Servants strong?” Hoppou asks, thinking.

    “The versions Zelretch talks about are definitely all strong.” Wolfen admits, thinking. “I just don’t know what type I’d get. More importantly, if it’s a version of Mommy, she won’t likely recognize me, or want to hug or snuggle with me.”

    Hoppou nods, hugging Wolfen from behind quietly. For a long while, they just relax together like that, Wolfen studying the gem, and Hoppou hugging Wolfen.

    Well, I suppose I can bring up options, if no one else will.” Mordred admits, as she speaks up. “Considering what happened on your ship, which version of Tamamo is the most likely one you’re going to get?

    Wolfen blinks, thinking, before blinking more. “I suppose it would be that… Koyanskaya lady, Mordred.”

    Either her or Amaterasu. Which do you think is more likely?” Mordred questions, helping lead Wolfen in her thoughts.

    “I’m… not sure.” Wolfen admits, quietly. “I don’t know anything about the one Amaterasu possessed, in that universe. If she’s good, or evil.”

    Considering I’m only getting data from Erik’s summoned version of myself, I don’t either. With how vague it can be at times, as well? It’s honestly hard to say.” Mordred trails off, thinking. “However, if it is her, we’ll be able to use that to have her recognize you.

    Wolfen’s eyes narrow, while Hoppou listens. Then Wolfen sighs, nodding. “You’re right, my Captain. She’d have the best chance at recognizing me, and be the most useful for me as a result.”

    Especially since she’ll likely remember how to control and convert Legend into Prana, as well as possibly serve as crew for you if we run low?” Mordred half questions, all the while gently leading Wolfen to the thought process Mordred is having. “Evil, good, everyone can be self centered sometimes. But her healing ability was both useful and potent.

    Hoppou quietly nods. “Mordred seems right. If she has experience with you and being on board, she might be able to serve as crew when not serving as a Servant for you!”

    At Hoppou’s words, Wolfen nods, before kneeling in front of the rock. “Back up a bit while I try this, Hoppou.”

    Hoppou hops back, watching carefully, eyes wide.

    “Let Silver and Steel be the Essence.
    Let Meteorite Steel and the archduke of contracts be the foundation.
    Let my faction be the faction I pay tribute to.”

    Wolfen’s eyes close, as she focuses on the incantation, words subtly altering themselves as she focuses, and the Sessho-Seki stone glows a bright pink.

    “Let rise a wall against the end that will come.
    Let the four cardinal gates close.
    Let the three-forked road from the crown reaching unto the Kingdom rotate.”

    Crackling lightning flickers in and out of existence around the Sessho-Seki stone, as Wolfen’s command spell grows a brilliant red.

    “Let it be declared now; your flesh shall serve under me, and my fate shall be with your sword.
    Submit to the beckoning of the Shipgirl Wolfen outside the domain of the Holy Grail.
    Answer, if you would submit to this will and this truth.”

    Wolfen breathes in and out, one hand clutching her chest, as the Sessho-Seki starts crackling with power, reflecting the amount Wolfen is generating.

    “An oath shall be sworn here.
    I shall attain all virtues of all of Heaven;
    I shall have dominion over all evils of all of Hell.”

    Wolfen shakes, as lightning crackles between her and the Sessho-Seki, rapidly filling her reserves of energy to the brink, then far beyond, as Mordred’s ring struggles to hold the power now flowing into it.

    “From the Seventh Heaven, attended to by three great words of power,
    come forth from the ring of restraint, protector of the holy balance!”

    Wolfen cries out, as reality almost twists, before a lightning bolt slams into the Catalyst before them, in broad daylight.

    For a moment, Wolfen can see the Sessho-Seki dissolving, the spirit within smiling up at her. A flicker of lightning slams into her from it, leaving Wolfen flying back, as a red ring ripples into existence on the ground.

    Then Hoppou is left on her back, looking at the place where the Sessho-Seki stood.

    Pink hair. Pink tail. A lighter shade than her mother’s original coloring from pictures she had on board, but still showing herself as a relative. Exactly as she’d looked, when Amaterasu possessed her once before, but a much different smile on her face. The Cheongsam showing a lot of cleavage is barely even noticed, compared to the hair.

    “Servant Alter Ego, Koyanskaya has been summoned. I ask of thee, are you my Master?”

    “I am.” Wolfen admits, as she pulls herself up. “Though using the Sessho-Seki as a Catalyst may have been a bit ill-advised.” Wolfen continues, then walks up to her.

    “Exactly how you looked when my Daddy summoned you, before Amaterasu possessed you.” Wolfen admits, quietly.

    Koyanskaya stills, staring at her new Master with a far more careful look, and a bitter smile. “I vaguely remember that, though it looked like the counterpart of my originator never split herself off like mine did. Though, I thought your parents were having issues with children?”

    “Ah, that’s because I’m a part of the ship you were in, somehow turned into a cross between a ship and a lady.” Wolfen admits.

    Koyanskaya blinks repeatedly. Then she looks more carefully at Wolfen. Then she breathes in and out, slowly, a frown on her face. “Okay, I’ll buy that, considering I saw a flash of your hull. If smaller than the one I vaguely remember you having when I was in it.”

    Wolfen nods. “I’m as I was first built, not upgraded to survive the trip to Mars, as I was later. Lots of missing upgrades, and not much Legend or energy production.” Wolfen admits, quietly. “But I summoned you for good reason.”

    “Believe me, I’m grateful for that summoning. The way things were going, I’m not sure my soul would have survived, otherwise.” Koyanskaya admits, arms folded.

    We’ve got an apocalypse hitting here by Christmas, and it’s the end of February, because the local deities don’t like beings like myself, as I’ve become, or Hoppou here existing, and decided to send some people from something called ‘Arpeggio of Blue Steel’ armed with what that drunk goddess called ‘railgun nukes’ to deal with all of them.” Wolfen admits. “You’re the only possible Servant that might be able to pose as a crew member on me when we’re not fighting, and help my captain figure out how to get us out of this mess.

    Koyanskaya’s eyes narrowed to slits, as she frowns. “What allies do we have for this?

    Hoppou and her allies, the shipgirl Kongou, one Goddess of Fortune, Eris, who doesn’t like what’s going on, and Zelretch.” Wolfen replies, immediately. “Who mentioned he was planning on bringing one of the people over from that Arpeggio of Blue Steel to possibly help.

    Not impossible then, but just difficult. I’ve faced worse odds, I suppose.” Koyanskaya admits, frowning. “Still, if you want my Noble Phantasm to be fully functional, I’ll be needing tokens from our enemies. Things they value, and the like.”

    Wolfen nods, thinking, before pulling Hoppou in for a hug, while studying her Servant. After a bit, she sighs, before speaking up. “Exactly what are your goals, long term?”

    “I was backed against the wall, being forced to use something that was, suffice to say, drastically incomplete, and was in the middle of feeling like my Spirit Origin was about to be shattered, or weakened back to the beginning. To be perfectly honest? Every single thing I’d done and accomplished was feeling like it was on the verge of being outright unmade when you whisked me here to safety. Even if it’s at the cost of serving you, it’s far better than being completely unmade, don’t you agree?” Koyanskaya admits.

    “Your spirit origin, that… part of you that’s on the Throne of Heroes?” Wolfen asks, carefully.

    Koyanskaya nods, her arms folded. “I have Independant Manifestation Rank EX, but if my survival ever gets noticed by the ones who abandoned me…” She trails off, quietly. “I doubt I’ll keep it.”

    “That bunch will have a hard time figuring out you still exist, or that the drain is still there, I suspect.” Zelretch announces from behind Koyanskaya. “Though, if you’re good and help, I’ll guarantee you have a shot at completing things, as a ‘just in case’ measure for the Fleet of Fog, if they’re influenced even with our plans.”

    Koyanskaya stills, tail bushing up as she goes wide eyed. “The infamous Zelretch, I presume?”

    “You assume correctly, just like I assumed that you would be the one summoned, and prepared appropriately.” Zelretch nods, before turning to look at the portal. “Coming, Kongo, Flagship of the Black Fleet?”

    Wolfen stills, staring at a beautiful and regal blonde walking through. A long black dress, showing off enough of her black tights and heel, emphasise her long legs and height. Reddish eyes focus on her, the neutral expression on her purple lips studying her, before turning to glance at Hoppou as well.

    The tiny whispered squeak of “Oh GOD she’s hot!” from Wolfen is ignored by all.

    “Intriguing. So these are the shipgirls and Abyssals you spoke of, hm?” Kongo glances over at Koyanskaya, eyes narrowing slightly and somewhat inhumanly, as the two sets of camera lenses in her eyes adjust.

    “What of this… outlier?” Kongo asks.

    “An ally, for now.” Wolfen coughs, and moves forwards. “Prototype Aerial Battleship Wolfen! I’m pleased to meet you!” With those words, she reaches up and offers her hand to the Mental Model in front of her.

    For a moment, Kongo’s eyes twist, as data screens flash in front of her. Then her eyes return to normal, as she nods to Wolfen. “Ah, a handshake. I suppose it’s fruitful to meet you, as well.” With that, she takes Wolfen’s hand and shakes it twice, before releasing Wolfen’s hand calmly.

    “Hoppou is Hoppou!” Hoppou says, smiling, before shivering a bit at Kongo’s neutral expression turns towards her.

    “You both are examples of what my fleet would be fighting eventually, due to alterations to our link to the Admiralty Code, hm? I suppose it’s better to get through the formalities, then. I am Mental Model Kongo, avatar of the ship Kongo, of what is known to humanity as the Fleet of Fog. We serve the Admiralty Code and it’s orders.” Kongo states, imperiously.

    Then she folds her arms, regally. “As for you, Wolfen, I’m open for trading technologies between our two groups. Most importantly would be the technology of a certain armor your father developed, capable of shielding someone from the affects of another universe?”

    For one single moment, Koyanskaya stills, her tail bushed up, as she can see a figure in the distance watching them all, wearing what looks like an Apollo Space Suit. Then she shivers more at the realization that the figure disappeared, and she didn’t notice.

    She opens her mouth, before she spots Zelretch shaking his head at her, a knowing look on his face.

    Meanwhile, Wolfen’s rubbing her chin, studying Kongo. “I should be able to synthesize it over the course of several months, but I have a rather tiny supply of it in the first place. Wolfen finally admits. “Unless you’re happy with a few inches of the stuff, as the supply is now, it’s going to take at least a few months.”

    Kongo looks over at Zelretch, who has a smug look on his face. “I suppose that’s what he was planning on, then. I’m willing to suggest deals as offered by Yamato.” Kongo finally admits. “Though, Zelretch? Are the safety options we discussed prepared, just in case?”

    “Perfectly set up and ready. You’ll have some difficulty miniaturizing any trade agreements, much less successfully aligning it to her without desynchronizing herself from her still existing ship. But with what Yamato planned for, you should be good.” Zelretch admits, smile never fading.

    “Ah, right. Also, Koyanskaya?” The Kitsune in question jerks to look at him, carefully. “For every ten pranks done in my name, towards my goals in this universe? I’ll look into helping you out somehow. For every hundred, I’ll help you work out ways to replace what you’ve lost. For every thousand, I’ll personally help you by gaining one of the missing tokens you need.”

    Koyanskaya slowly nods, her eyes narrowed to slits as she thinks. Then she smiles widely. “Why so generous towards me?”

    “You’re Wolfen’s trump card, now, which means you should be appropriately armed as one.” Zelretch snorts. “Anyways, ensuring my enemies fail in hilarious ways is done better by a Kitsune, when it’s not me doing it personally.”

    “Anyways.” Zelretch adds after a moment of silence from Koyanskaya. “I’d rather you keep them distracted, then have them attempt to subvert the Admiralty Code and it’s connections with it’s ships, like Kongo.”

    Kongo silently nods. “Agreed. Ensuring the Admiralty Code is obeyed, rather than false lies spread by monsters wishing to taint it, is what I’ve come here for.”

    “Well, with that, I’m leaving now. Have fun, Kongo!” With those words, Zelretch disappears.

    “So, is your ship the Kongo, or a replica, or…?” Wolfen asks, eventually, looking at Kongo.

    “I believe it’s a replica, I’m afraid. But it’s hard to tell with what the Admiralty Code was up to, during the time of that war.” Kongo admits, almost hesitantly.

    “Want to meet the shipgirl of the Kongou here?” Wolfen asks. “We’ll have to touch base with her over this anyways, and you coming as proof would help soften things up for the ‘We’ve got a possible apocalypse come Christmas time’ issue I still have to alert her to.”

    A sigh from Kongo erupts from her, as she frowns a bit. “I suppose I’ll meet with her.” Kongo nods, before blinking. “There’s some extra pronunciation there, I notice.”

    “We’re going to have to keep you separate somehow with names so similar, aren’t we?” Wolfen asks, blushing a bit, then sighs. “Hope you enjoy tea, because she loves the stuff!”




    Kongo’s Safe House, Yokosuka, Japan
    3 Hours Later




    Kongo stares. Kongou stares back, one arm around her Teitoku possessively as she ensures everyone tea is topped up, doing her best to not show any internal terror or indecision. Admiral Kouzuki stares as well, eyes wide as he thinks over the story they’d all been told, but one arm around Kongou’s shoulders, holding her close. Wolfen sighs, hugging Hoppou with one arm, while drinking tea to help her sore throat from talking so long.

    The trip there wasn’t hard, with Koyanskaya figuring out how to astralize in a smaller, more power conserving mode, and sticking herself into Wolfen’s hull.

    In truth, her Independant Manifestation was keeping them topped up on Legend somewhat better than before!

    But between bringing an Abyssal Princess, even if she’s friendly, as well as an alternate version of Kongo who might be invading by Christmas Time?

    There had been a lot of luck in arranging things so last minute, but somehow Kongou had managed to set things up.

    Moreover, the tale in and of itself was… incredibly hard to believe. At least until you noted the blonde who could make swords out of impossibly strong energy waves that survived attacks from shipgirls. Their secondary weapons, at least.

    That had moved Admiral Kouzuki into listening, at least.

    Projector clips from Wolfen, showing the deities in question, and the conversations, on the other hand? That had ended all debate.

    “The tea is nice, thank you.” Kongo eventually admits.

    “Please, do try the Scones! I made them myself, and they’re delicious, Dess!” Kongou returns, smiling as things shift to a more familiar pattern than the ‘Oh fuck, we’re all going to die!’ mentality she’d had, a few minutes earlier.

    “This is much better than what I can drink while in direct contact with another ship, mentally.” Kongo admits, eventually. “Or the digital representations, at least. Would you be willing to share the recipe?”

    “Of course! Do please try the biscuits and scones out, though, as well? I do believe I outdid myself when matching the flavors of them to help emphasise the flavors of the tea!” Kongou admits, smiling.

    After one bite, Kongo eventually nods. “I wonder if this is why Hyuuga’s fleet all loves Mental Models like this one. Experiences like this?” She murmurs quietly.

    “Quite likely. It’s an incredible change, having machines think for you, to having humans think for you.” Wolfen admits. “The experiences between machines and humanity is far different, as well.”

    “What do you think we can do, Wolfen? Can we win?” Kongou asks, quietly.

    “We sure can, if we play our cards right. Hoppou’s fleet has to help unify the Abyssals wherever possible, so they’re likely going to have to take over the Pacific Ocean’s groups of Abyssals.” Wolfen admits. “At first, anyways. While that’s happening, I’ll make my move, checking out the stuff I need to investigate for proper repairs. Additionally, I need to figure out where some Kitsune are, and if I can get them to join my crew.” Wolfen admits, drumming her fingers. “When we’re done, We’ll prank the Deities in question, and work on countering the issues in Europe, before we start working on pacifying and getting the Abyssals there to work together.”

    “While we, on the other hand, unite and keep summoning shipgirls?” Admiral Kouzuki thinks out loud. “That’ll work.”

    “Hoppou thinks they’ll trust Kongou, if she goes with Hoppou back to them. Before, they might not have, but now, Hoppou thinks they will.” Hoppou speaks up. “Kongou helped Wolfen heal. They respect that.”

    Kongou sighs softly. “I suppose I could let the others help with the convoys, while I help you out. But I’ll miss Teitoku while I’m gone!”

    “Perhaps if I can get more satellites in orbit with my railgun, I’ll be able to set up world wide communications so you never lose contact?” Wolfen brings up with a smile on her face. “Of course, that means I have to get my keel repaired so it can happen…” Wolfen trails off, then sighs.

    “Your damage is still that bad, then?” Admiral Kouzuki queries, carefully.


    Wolfen nods, quietly. “My spinal mounted weapons, the railgun and the laser cannon, is all that’s holding the two parts of my keel together.”

    Admiral Kouzuki nods with a sigh. “Damn. I was hoping to have you on convoys.”

    “Not yet, sorry. I’ll participate when I’m fixed up, but I’m mostly focusing on planning on sabotaging the plans for those deities.” Wolfen admits. “Keeping them from developing ways to screw you all over is the better plan in the long run.”

    Admiral Kouzuki nods, before Kongou pulls him close in a big hug.

    “Wolfen, I think Teitoku and I need to discuss things in private. Thoroughly, if you catch my drift.” Kongou smiles at her. “Hoppou, it was nice to see you again. Kongo, it’s nice to meet an alternate of myself. There’s bedrooms in the building, and it should be free of spying methods.” With those words, Kongou sweeps her admiral off his feet, then carries him out the door, much to his protests.

    A long pause reigns, as the three left stare, before Wolfen giggles softly. “Aww, they’re so cute together!”

    “Hoppou is going to see what’s on the Television, okay?” With those words, Hoppou sneaks out. “Hoppou hopes you both have fun!”

    Wolfen looks at Kongo.

    Kongo looks back.

    “Want me to make you more tea, or heat any of the food up for you?” Wolfen asks.

    “I’m fine for now.” Kongo admits.

    For a moment, they both pause, as an impossible impact is felt for them both. Mutual blinking occurs as Wolfen focuses, feeling her Satellite in orbit backing up, while Kongo makes a second body out of nanomaterial.

    Up in orbit, a Legion of Coal unit grumbling about space debris, slowly pulls itself out of the satellite, to check it over for any heavy damage. Then it looks at what the satellite hit.

    A massive black ship lies in space, prow aimed down at the earth. Huge cannons are on the ship. Nearby, constructs shaped something like massive, giant Torii gates float in space as well.

    Then the Legion of Coal unit blinks as it’s pulled away, only for it to go still as it looks up into Kongo’s eyes, a new body somehow, impossibly, on the ship in space.

    It waves. Kongo blinks.

    “Finding my crew fun to look at, Kongo?” Wolfen interrupts her control slightly, leaving both bodies stiffening in shock. Then Kongo nods, the edges of her lips curling upwards ever so slightly.

    “Oh, very much so. Quite impressive, I must say.” Kongo admits, then pauses as something occurs to her. “Say, would they happen to understand tactics at all?”

    “They do, though there’s precious few that are full sized, right now. With the hefty drain to my Legend every time I create one, I need more legend sources than the recharge I got from messing with the Sessho-Seki stone earlier.” Wolfen admits, then smiles. “Of course, with how strong you are, we could probably deal with things together for finding such legend sources, and they might even be of help for you, as well!”

    Kongo folds her arms, thinking, before she nods. “I’m guessing it takes time to build one?”

    “Aside from the hit to my Legend stores, it also makes me go from feeling full, to feeling like I’ve got an empty hole in me from hunger, lack of fuel, lack of resources, and so on and so forth.” Wolfen admits.

    Kongo slowly nods. “So debilitating, but not horribly so. Any prices for such?”

    Wolfen thinks, silently, drumming her fingers. “How about a general alliance between your Fleet of Fog and myself, my father and his creations and allies, and anyone that leaves their sides of the shipgirl and Abyssal conflict to join my own?”

    “Your father and his creations and allies?” Kongo asks, one eyebrow raised.

    “They’re lost between universes, I have no clue where he is compared to where I am, and I’m not likely to find him easily. In comparison, with his luck, he might stumble over me in the future. Considering he’s on the rest of my ship that didn’t make it here, and rebuilding it, with only 6 people on board aside from himself, that aren’t Legion of Coal units?” Wolfen says, thoughtfully. “I’d like to keep it somewhat open, in case Daddy finds me. But if not, having your people know who he is in case he ever finds you and not me would work well.”

    The edges of Kongo’s lips raise up a bit once more, before she nods again. “Fair, I think. I’ll adjust my course so your little toy in orbit doesn’t hit my assets again, as well.”

    “Thanks for that. They’re a bitch to fix, since I can’t use my railgun right now.” Wolfen admits, a wry smile on her face.

    Kongo doesn’t really notice it, as they eat, while starting to discuss things more thoroughly, getting to know each other and their technologies, the advantages and disadvantages to both, as they talk through the night. They do both notice as they run out of snacks, and Wolfen yawns.

    “I should get some sleep. You want me to grab you anything, and do you need a bed?” Wolfen asks, quietly.

    “I suppose I’ll find a place to sit down for a while. I need to think about things.” Kongo nods.

    “Goodnight, then!” Wolfen cheerfully says, as she leaves.

    Kongo nods at Wolfen as she leaves, then frowns.

    “Searching for definitions of ‘hot’. Likely definition found.” Kongo states, as purple patterns flow around her, before disappearing just as fast.


    “She thinks I’m attractive? I suppose I can’t fault her, since she seems more biologically towards a human than I am.” Kongo states, then pauses. “Furthermore, Yamato ordered me to try to broaden my horizons, while understanding that for most people, memories simply can’t be transferred, only described.” Kongo frowns.

    “I still don’t understand what she means, but I suppose I’ll try for her sake. Even if she’s always going to be confusing to me.” With those words, Kongo moves to a free bedroom.

    Alone in the room, the space suited figure stands motionless. Not one person once noticing her. Not one person having spotted her at any moment.

    Then it too is gone.


    Author’s Notes:
    The Sessho-Seki stone that Tamamo’s soul is stored in gave Wolfen the equivalent of a natural critical success for summoning a Servant, and rebuilding her power reserves.

    Not quite enough for Wolfen to get Kitsune as crew members, though.

    So, their next stop is to find any kitsune that might still be in Japan and want to join her crew, before heading for Europe… and the massive clusterfuck there.

    As Kongo and Wolfen’s technology base isn’t exactly completely compatible in any way, shape or form, they have a lot of work to do if they’re going to trade heavily on technology to each other. What with one involving divine legend to be made, and the other involving bullshit technology to the point where it’s “science and magic might be one and the same!” bullshit.

    As for the spacesuit clad figure? You’ll have to wait for more, or figure that out yourself. Or read the manga! The manga is great, if terrifyingly overpowered! But it’s up to you.

    Also, sorry for no Christmas Special from me. I’d tried to write it, but I just couldn’t get the creative juices flowing for it.

    You’re stuck with another Wolfen chapter instead.

    Hope everyone had a Merry Christmas Eve, and a Wonderful Christmas, even with what’s been going around!
    Last edited by RanmaBushiko; December 27th, 2020 at 11:33 PM.
    I'm starting to suspect that talking with Kieran influences my rolls on Fate/Grand Order Heavily. How else can you explain me talking with him, then rolling for 30, only to get 3 Archer of Shinjuku on my second ten roll?

    I write like Douglas Adams. Proof: http://iwl.me/s/696f37bd

  16. #6796
    吸血鬼 Vampire
    Join Date
    Mar 2019
    Age
    28
    Posts
    248
    Sorry, doing Christmas things, so haven't had a chance to respond.

    Interesting summoning chant variation. Is that Zelretch's doing?

    Koyanskaya is kinda of expected, given how Independent Manifestation takes care of a lot of prana/Legend considerations. Definitely some interesting implied backstory there as well, which I'm guessing has to do with certain later-Lostbelt events that I haven't actually read yet.

    Spacesuit figure almost CERTAINLY seems like it's something involving the Admirality Code, given that you've pointed the Code out as being terrifyingly eldritch a few times, and did the same for the spacesuit.

    Kongo and Wolfen interact... interestingly, probably because they're not entirely friendly, but not entirely hostile.

    I need more legend sources than the recharge I got from messing with the Sessho-Seki stone earlier.” Wolfen admits, then smiles. “Of course, with how strong you are, we could probably deal with things together for finding such legend sources, and they might even be of help for you, as well!”

    Kongo folds her arms, thinking, before she nods. “I’m guessing it takes time?”

    “It also makes me go from feeling full, to feeling like I’ve got an empty hole in me from hunger, lack of fuel, lack of resources, and so on and so forth.” Wolfen admits.

    Kongo slowly nods. “So debilitating, but not horribly so. Any prices for such?”

    Wolfen thinks, silently, drumming her fingers. “How about a general alliance between your Fleet of Fog and myself, my father and his creations and allies, and anyone that leaves their sides of the shipgirl and Abyssal conflict to join my own?”

    “Your father and his creations and allies?” Kongo asks, one eyebrow raised.
    I don't... quite follow this conversation. Previously they were talking about the Legion of Coal, and they've segued into... talking about why Wolfen needs Legend sources, and presumably making a deal about gathering legend sources so Kongo can use Wolfen's technology? Which would make sense if they had been talking about i.e. paradigm shielding, but they hadn't been talking about that for quite some time.

  17. #6797
    死徒 Dead Apostle RanmaBushiko's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Location
    Near Seattle
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    730
    US Friend Code
    691,985,459
    Blog Entries
    10
    Quote Originally Posted by Arbitrarity View Post
    Sorry, doing Christmas things, so haven't had a chance to respond.
    No worries, I get it.

    Interesting summoning chant variation. Is that Zelretch's doing?
    More instinct because she's a ship as much as a girl, and there's no Holy Grail to help out.

    Koyanskaya is kinda of expected, given how Independent Manifestation takes care of a lot of prana/Legend considerations. Definitely some interesting implied backstory there as well, which I'm guessing has to do with certain later-Lostbelt events that I haven't actually read yet.
    That and Koyanskaya being her father's original servant, before Amaterasu literally went "Nope! Dibs!" and took over?

    Koyanskaya is... hard to get into a mindset to write, to be honest. Still watching through translated dialogue on youtube, NA and otherwise, but it's been slow going to ensure she's effectively canon. Still, you'll get to see one of the bits involving her next chapter. Terrifyingly canon, but ambiguous enough that it shouldn't be rather too much spoilers, I think...

    Spacesuit figure almost CERTAINLY seems like it's something involving the Admirality Code, given that you've pointed the Code out as being terrifyingly eldritch a few times, and did the same for the spacesuit.
    Eldritch thing is gonna eldritch.

    Kongo and Wolfen interact... interestingly, probably because they're not entirely friendly, but not entirely hostile.
    Yeah, Kongo is literally a machine getting used to a human body and mindset due to her Mental Model. The manga states outright, that Kongo is one of the last to have it forced on them, because Yamato is the Head Flagship, and put her foot down hard.

    She's not a fan of being a pretty girl, emotions, and having flaws. At the same time, she's desperate for better tactics and an understanding thereof.

    I don't... quite follow this conversation. Previously they were talking about the Legion of Coal, and they've segued into... talking about why Wolfen needs Legend sources, and presumably making a deal about gathering legend sources so Kongo can use Wolfen's technology? Which would make sense if they had been talking about i.e. paradigm shielding, but they hadn't been talking about that for quite some time.
    Pretty much, it's the cost for building one that's full sized.

    It pretty much is Wolfen going: "Yes, I can make you a Legion of Coal unit, eventually, but I'm going to need lots of legend sources to handle the cost on that side of things! But right now, it feels like I'm going from full stores of everything to running on just about empty already, so it's going to take a lot of extra stuff for you to make even one."

    Kongo in return querying prices, and getting a "How about a long term alliance, instead?" is... probably smarter for Wolfen overall.

    Of course, considering Kongo's lack of time as a Mental Model is biting her in the ass here for personal relations, too. She is very much trying to not get attached to anyone or anything here. It might not be working out too well for her.

    I edited it for a bit more clarity on the sudden jump, there. Hope that helps.
    Last edited by RanmaBushiko; December 27th, 2020 at 11:34 PM.
    I'm starting to suspect that talking with Kieran influences my rolls on Fate/Grand Order Heavily. How else can you explain me talking with him, then rolling for 30, only to get 3 Archer of Shinjuku on my second ten roll?

    I write like Douglas Adams. Proof: http://iwl.me/s/696f37bd

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •