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Thread: The 4th Annual Holy Grail War Live! [A Silly Tale]

  1. #21
    吸血鬼 Vampire Megaolix's Avatar
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    Lancers are never lucky, huh?

  2. #22
    Worried Soul That Watches Larekko12's Avatar
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    Go Go Kiirtsugu Protect your woman from the NTR.

    Rider you rapscallious dog how dare you hit on another man wife like that. have you no honor and pride?
    Then let it break, if it shatters to pieces then forge an even better blade to take in hand. Should that blade crack then forge once again, untill the battlefield is a graveyard of blades that have fallen and but a single sword claims the field that embodies the world. Let that sword bear the world untill its time comes and time blows its dust to the winds. Then forge again.---Eric Dagger



  3. #23
    Romance Expert amado's Avatar
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    this is hilarious.
    I anticipated the kiss for lancelot but I was thinking more of him fighting back rather than running away...

    there's also a bit more foreshadowing(if you can call it that), with iri and risei being the announcers.
    gotta love all of berserker's moments in this.

  4. #24
    I'm making funny faces at work and it's ALL YOUR FAULT.

  5. #25
    I happen to be an expert on this topic Pata Hikari's Avatar
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    Life Advice from Grail-kun!
    "Grail-kun." Emiya Kiritsugu walked into Grail-kun's room.

    "Ah good evening Kiritsugu-kun!" Grail-kun said, as cheerful as ever.

    "I have sacrificed so much for my ideals." Kiritsugu clenched his fist. "So... much.... so people don't have to suffer. Please, Grail-kun! Please help me bring about world peace!"

    Grail-kun laughed. "Oh silly Kiritsugu-kun. World peace is easy. With my patented World Peace Generator!"

    He threw a knife at Kiritsugu's feet.

    "Kill everyone and the world will finally be at peace."

    "......" Kiritsugu's eye twitched.

    Oh Grail-kun, you lovable scamp you.

  6. #26
    リビングデッド Living Dead
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    Oh Sehai-kun...

    Anyway, glad that you're still alive Pata! So does that mean you'll be updating Edless Dream soon?

  7. #27
    I want my Carnival Zero!

    When are we going to have our racing episode?

  8. #28
    吸血鬼 Vampire B.B. Rain's Avatar
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    How did I miss this originally? This is amazing!

    Honestly, my favorite part was the beginning, when Gilgamesh wondered if Tokiomi was an alcoholic. That just got to me somehow.
    Quote Originally Posted by Moczo View Post
    "Earn Shirou's love, Berserker!" Ilya said.

    "RRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAARGH!" Berserker said, interpreting this order the way he interpreted most orders: kill.
    Quote Originally Posted by Moczo View Post
    "Berserker!" Ilya screamed. "Come find love!"

    Berserker exploded into the room with a roar that shook the foundations of the very castle.

    "GAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Rin said.

    Sweeping down on her faster than the eye could see, Berserker plucked Rin up in his arms and ran off, ignoring her shrieks of protest.

  9. #29
    I happen to be an expert on this topic Pata Hikari's Avatar
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    An unbalanced diet
    "Huh? Where's Sakura?" Kariya asked.

    "Ah... Sakura isn't in our family anymore..." Rin said quietly.

    Kariya's eyes widened, he turned to Aoi...


    ~---------------------~

    "Oh? So you're back, Kariya? I thought I told you to never darken our doors again." Zouken said.

    "Where is Tohsaka Sakura." Kariya said, his eyes cold.

    "Oh? What business is it of yours?" Zouken laughed.

    "Just... just..."

    "Fine, you want to see her?"


    ~---------------------~

    In the room that had made Kariya abandon his family, ditch the horrid magic. That room filled with... worms, Sakura sat.

    "She was shouting and screaming for the first while. But then she quieted down after a while."

    Kariya's eye twitched. "That's... because.... you've thrown her in in a room... in which the only thing to eat... was gummi worms!"

    Zouken raised an eyebrow, "Kids like candy though."

    "Not nothing but! For gods sake why do you think I left this retarded family! Magic is stupid! You're stupid! Sakura's stuck in a stupid situation!"

    "Oh! Hi Uncle Kariya!" Sakura waved from the bit.

    "Hi Sakura, I'll get you a hamburger later." He said quickly" ("Yay! Sakura said) He then turned back to Zouken. "Her hair is purple now! PURPLE!"

    "Your point?" Zouken sounded genuinely confused.

    "It's supposed to be black!" Kariya shouted, "But no... you made her do nothing but eat those godforsaken magical gummi worms for..."

    "Three days."

    "Three freaking days!"

    "Well maybe if someone hadn't ran out of the family I wouldn't have needed to adopt a new child."

    "Oh you are not bringing this up again." Kariya said. "I refuse to participate in such stupidity."

    "OK then, I guess I'll just keep training Sakura then...." Zouken said.

    Kariya's eye twitched. "OK! Fine! I'll get you the Holy Grail then. How about that? The competitions in three months."

    "Humph. Fine. You'll need training first though..."




    ~---------------------~

    "Tohsaka Tokiomi!" Kariya shouted as he and Berserker waited in line for the Holy Grail War.

    "Matou Kariya..." He stopped sipping his wine for a second. "What... what happened to you?" Kariya's hair was white, his eyes weren't quite looking in the same direction anymore, he had a limp, and was twitching a lot.

    "This... this.... Ghuh..." He vomited, dozens of Gummi worms coming out of his guy... "You... I hate you... Tokiomi...."



    ~---------------------~

    "Sorry Sakura." Kariya said as he and Berserker sat in the pit next to her. "Saber destroyed the grail and then a fire burned down half the town."

    "█████████...." Berserker whined. (He was still upset about the "kissing" thing)

    "...It's OK." Sakura said as they sat amongst the worms. "Uncle Kariya?"

    "Yes?"

    "Can we get a burger now?"

    "Sure."

  10. #30
    河童 Gabriulio's Avatar
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    That was funny and "d'awwww" at the same time.

    Quote Originally Posted by celsius View Post
    If Saber and Shirou got married... Would that make Shirou the Queen of Britain?

  11. #31
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    It's rather odd, really. Zouken trains Sakura with gummi worms?

  12. #32
    河童 Gabriulio's Avatar
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    Well, it is supposed to be crack.

    Quote Originally Posted by celsius View Post
    If Saber and Shirou got married... Would that make Shirou the Queen of Britain?

  13. #33
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    Well, yes, true....

  14. #34
    I happen to be an expert on this topic Pata Hikari's Avatar
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    I am a terrible person fyi
    Fate/Stay Night: Life is an Endless Dream Chapter 12: Settling into place
    Tsukihime: Role Revert Part 10: Were you here the whole time?
    Fate + Tsuki: Slayer/Savior Part 1: Forge/Assassin
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  15. #35
    死徒 Dead Apostle zhead's Avatar
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    Would you prefer happinees worms?
    ... Does anyone remember this thread: http://forums.nrvnqsr.com/showthread...-input-welcome ?

    So, according to D&D's alignment check, I'm a True Neutral. Huh.

  16. #36
    Fail Event Horizon Agailius's Avatar
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    Pata... you magnificent bastard... I nearly died laughing.

    MOARZ!!!
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    Quote Originally Posted by Arch-Magos Winter View Post
    When Agailius thinks your idea is really really stupid, you know you've screwed up.

  17. #37
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    Comedy gold.

  18. #38
    吸血鬼 Vampire linkhyrule5's Avatar
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    So, what was the rocket at the end of the first snippit?

  19. #39
    I'm Nothing... Mr. House's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by linkhyrule5 View Post
    So, what was the rocket at the end of the first snippit?
    Nothing, the set was set on fire.

    Show
    "From the words of a wise man: thou shall have lesyay, lemons, and laughter!"
    Quote Originally Posted by ILurkNoMoar
    It all started with him trying to learn some household skills so he could spend more time with her and have more in common with his crush.
    My FF.Net profile: Mister House

    TM Projects:
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  20. #40
    I happen to be an expert on this topic Pata Hikari's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by linkhyrule5 View Post
    So, what was the rocket at the end of the first snippit?
    Watch the first episode of Carnival Phantasm.
    Fate/Stay Night: Life is an Endless Dream Chapter 12: Settling into place
    Tsukihime: Role Revert Part 10: Were you here the whole time?
    Fate + Tsuki: Slayer/Savior Part 1: Forge/Assassin
    Pata Hikari's Tsukihime Short stories: Lastest story: A Midnight Dreary

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