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Thread: Heroic Deed

  1. #1

    Heroic Deed

    Something I've written months ago and still writing it now from time to time, posted in ff.net but I would also think that I might make things interesting and challenging myself here in Beast Lair, plus I thought I want to make a difference. I'm no skilled writer like Five X and Heroslayer but I do what I can do.

    Disclaimer:

    Characters in Fate Stay Night and Nanohaverse don’t belong to me.


    Notes

    This fic takes place in the a crossover timeline [both Nausverse and Nanohaverse]. Thus, it explains the changes with their respective timelines. Oh, and this will be following Fate Route.


    Heroic Deed

    It’s a very strange thing to wonder that an action of one person can change your life forever. The same goes well with Nakajima Subaru, daughter of Major Nakajima Genya of the 108th Battalion of TSAB (Time-Space Administration Bureau).


    In the future, this powerless girl will grow up to be an enforcer of Riot Force 6,


    This is how she meets her friend and reliable mage partner, Teana Landster,


    This is how she meets her fellow enforcers, Caro Ru Lushe and Erio Mondial,


    This is how she reunites with one of her idols, Takamichi Nanoha,


    This is how she first meets her fellow combat cyborgs for the first time in her life,


    This is how she creates a powerful bond with her intelligent device, Mach Caliber,


    This is how she surpasses her own sister, Nakajima Ginga,


    This is how she fights like her mother at the end of the JS Incident, Nakajima Quint,


    This is how she meets her new sisters, Nakajima Cinque, Deicei, Nove and Wendi,


    This is how she will eventually meet the former Dark Ruler of Galea, Ixpellia,


    This is also how she will meet the young man in dire need of rescue, Touma Avenir,


    And most importantly, this is how she realizes her dreams of saving people.


    However, what people don’t know that a huge part of her dream of stems not from the moment The ace of aces rescued her from the blazing inferno, but during a much more earlier time on that same day when a man in red appeared in her life.

    [Scene Break]

    A year has passed since that day.

    Now, Nakajima Subaru is no longer the same weak and crying girl from before. She is now a young woman applying for the TSAB Ground Forces courses. This 15 year old girl can finally fight for herself. Equipped with her rollerblades and Revolver Knuckle, she aces through the examinations, fulfilling her dream to save people just like how her ‘hero’ saved her. If possible, she wants to meet her ‘hero’ again and say thank you to him. It wasn’t an easy journey, as she admits that she trains vigorously every day. Many times she has been defeated by her own weakness, fatigue and the daily routine she has partake herself into.

    However, it never dampens her spirit to be just like her hero and Takamichi-san.

    Teana Landster, on the other hand is an opposite of what Subaru is. Unlike her roommate, her reason for joining is merely to prove to herself that she is indeed qualified to be an enforcer and also to prove that her family’s magic is not as useless as it perceives. Needless, to say, this girl is very hardworking and very determined to reach her goal. Before, she failed to enter the Captain Air Force due to dropping out air combat training and recently join the ground forces where she first meets her roommate. With her own custom device, she will surely ace through Ground Forces.

    That is if her partner can keep her head in the game.

    During their time together as team-mates, Teana learned a few things about her. One, she’s a complete klutz. Why? It’s because she’s the reason why the instructor keeps berating them over her ‘mistakes’. It was so bad that even she wonders if she is taking their training seriously. Two, that Nakajima girl is trying so hard to be her friend, forget trying it’s more like forcing her to be her best friend. Another thing is that her roommate admires Takamichi Nanoha, the person responsible for her rescue in a big fire; told by the said girl’s sister, Nakajima Ginga.

    Normally, she doesn’t really care about her roommate’s life story but she can’t help feel that there is one shred of information missing……How on Mid-Childa did she even last that long inside the blazing flames? The smoke alone could’ve finished her off before her ‘hero’ arrived.

    It is a mystery until today, at least.

    “Nah Subaru what’s this on the table?”Teana Landster, Subaru’s roommate asked after stumbling upon an old notebook lay on the said girl’s desk out of curiosity with small portions of what seems to be newspaper cuttings sticking out. After flipping a few pages, she notices that there were all about a similar incident published from different newspapers. The articles inside seems to be familiar somehow……….

    “Old newspaper clippings; why?”Subaru on the other hand, just walked out of the bathroom, with a towel covering her head; indicating that she has just finished taking a shower. The only reason she’s not freaking out on her classmate for going through her stuff is mostly because she doesn’t want to be punished again by Tea……….

    “All of them are about a fire incident from last year. Any reason in particular you’re collecting them?” She eyed her with a suspicious look, assuming that the incident should at least traumatize the girl. What Subaru didn’t know is that her roommate is actually curious on why such specific event are kept as if they are no different than a scrapbook filled with pictures of Takamichi Nanoha she found on Subaru’s desk. Plus, she expects nothing more than something like this from her roommate anyway. Her admiration for her hero is getting a bit too far; but recording the details of the incident that took place in her life may be a bit too much of being a fanatic over The Ace of Aces and not to mention slightly disturbing. Then again, this is something what her roommate will actually do anyway.

    “I was there Tia.” The look on Teana’s face changed; now, she looks guilty since the older sister did mention of the incident that took place. “Hero-san saved me and ah-” Too late, Subaru accidently let it out.

    “Hero-san?” She gave her a look. “Takamichi-san you mean? You’re calling her hero-san?” Deep down she feel like laughing at how childish her roommate is, but then again The Ace of Aces has indeed saved people before and it’s no wonder that many people will actually refer to her as a superhero.

    “Well......No……I mean……Takamichi-san did save me but Hero-san-well-he-” She stuttered frantically. It also doesn’t help that her face flushed due to her stuttering.

    Wait, hero-san and Takamichi-san are two different people? A male at that? Teana on the other hand sighed, knowing what to do to make her roommate talk. There’s something wrong with this picture and she’s going to find out………

    People outside their dormitory could’ve sworn that they heard the Nakajima girl cried in horror inside her own room. Fully aware that the identity of her roommate is Teana Landster, everything else clicks; making sense that the cry of help is nothing more than a cry of being punished for her silly antics.

    And so, Subaru reluctantly (after being pinched at the cheek very very hard) told her the entire truth.

    [Scene Break]

    The entire place is filled with hot burning flames, incinerating everything it touches into ash.

    However, what is most dangerous than the flames is the smoke emitted strangles any living thing from breathing trapped inside the ensnaring inferno. This is no different for the young combat cyborg Nakajima Subaru.

    “Gin-Nee….” She pleaded for her sister to save her. In these last moments, She regretted running off everywhere across the airport, trying to find her sister instead of asking an adult to help her before the fire broke out. She can feel herself choking from the smoke, her consciousness leaving her in a matter of seconds.

    The last thing she sees before she’s beginning to pass out is the sight of an ominous tall figure standing, with burning hot flames in the background. He was dressed in red clothing, with armor. His hair is as white as snow; she vaguely remembers seeing it on television back home about a documentary about one of the newly-explored worlds by TSAB that experience wintertime all year around. His physical height surpasses or at least matches her father, making him look intimidating. He has the most vicious looking eyes she’s ever seen in her entire life; tears nearly fell from her own as she feels scared of what is going to happen to her.

    If it desire for her death that is………………

    With gentle and care, the ominous figure scoop her from the ground and begin walking (limping, judging by the speed he’s going). She can tell it’s a he based on what she suspects as a muscular body as he held her closer to him. Young Subaru couldn’t see much, but what she can remember and what she will always remember is that the he had a smile on his face, as he saves her from her apparent doom.

    Together, the both of them limp away from this blazing inferno.

    [Scene Break]

    Teana listen to the story with full attention.” Nah, Subaru did you ever found out about this ‘hero-san’ of yours? She asked, feeling slightly awkward saying it as she finds it childish. Although she has to admit that her roommate has a very interesting story to share. Never would she expect there was more to the story of what happened the klutzy girl other than just a repeat of the same tale where The Ace of Aces saving her from the flames. Now it all makes sense on why she was able to last so long.

    Now, regarding this ‘hero-san’ of hers, Teana’s brain immediately interprets that he was either a victim from the said incident, rescuing the child version of her roommate by pure instinct or he is a Time Space Administration Bureau officer, assigned for search and rescue. However, it is most likely that the man is the latter since the color of red is part of the uniform assigned for the TSAB officers aerial division. Though Subaru's description of his attire contradicts this. The only logical explanation that she can relate with her ‘he is a TSAB offcier’ theory that she can think of is that he’s either wearing a custom uniform, indicating that he is a high ranked mage or he is from a military organization from a non-administrated world; if not a mercenary or a bounty hunter. No one with normal jobs would want to wear armor right? Still, there is one more factor before she can convince herself that her theory is correct; is he even a mage in the first place? Why didn’t he cast a barrier to protect them from the smoke and flames? Or fly out of there? Loss of Device? Or he just simply can’t cast any spells? Who is this ‘hero’ person?

    “I never did found out who he was….” Nakajima Subaru, normally a very genki girl feels down as if her loved one has just died.

    “What happened?” The pigtailed girl asked. From her point of view, the sight of her purple-haired roommate’s current emotion is indeed unexpected (She’s always energetic, much to her annoyance).

    “He vanished right before my eyes…..” She lamented the final moments she shared with him. Back then, hero-san somehow literally disappeared as if he was never there in the first place.

    She can still remember how he tried to limp faster, forcing his body to comply.

    She can still remember how he grits his teeth harder as he limps forward; every step taken felt heavier than the last.

    She can still remember how his kind eyes turn back to what seems to be murderous set of eyes before, filled with anger and scorn towards something; something that young Subaru does not understand.

    She can still remember how he suddenly shouts out of the sudden, scaring her. The words were foreign to her, but have the meaning of discord and hate.

    She can still remember how gentle he was placing her down on the ground, his mouth went silent from the string of curses and his murderous eyes literally vanished instantly.

    She can still remember how he seems to vanish before her eyes, turning into sparkling dust bit by bit.

    Last but not least, she can still remember the last time he look at her with that honest-looking smile on his face; yet filled with sadness and regret, as if saying goodbye to her.

    The ensnaring flames somehow look less scary compared to watching him disappear, her hands wish to touch his face, to hug him and won’t let go. Maybe just maybe she will be gone from this place along with him.

    And he vanishes to oblivion, leaving her alone.

    END
    Last edited by shikyo21; February 13th, 2012 at 09:54 PM.

  2. #2
    夜魔 Nightmare Garlak's Avatar
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    Hmm. A Counter-Guardian EMIYA who momentarily retains consciousness/awareness, and manages to rescue somebody, before being de-summoned because his job is done?
    The telescope at one end of his beat
    And at the other end the microscope,
    Two instruments of nearly equal hope,
    And in conjunction giving quite a spread.
    Spoiler:
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mike1984 View Post
    I'm pretty sure that only applies to heroic spirits and other magical constructs, because there's no way in hell an ancient warship could defeat a modern one.
    This is Nasu. A trireme would totally ram a 122 gun SotL and win.
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    But it's mostly the arguments. This had to be my favorite moment:

    "You don't own BL."
    "Actually, he does..."
    "Well, he may legally own it, but it's not morally right, just like giving cancer sticks to children and being Satan. N-not that I'm comparing him to those or anything, baka."

  3. #3
    Can't catch a break Zer0light's Avatar
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    ahh i remember this story, read it on FF. interesting story

    "Red like roses fills my dreams and brings me to the place you rest."

  4. #4
    Κυρία Ἐλέησον Seika's Avatar
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    Mph. Needs a good beta-ing. Your tenses are all over the place. And a lot of awkward phrasing.
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  5. #5
    Quote Originally Posted by Seika View Post
    Mph. Needs a good beta-ing. Your tenses are all over the place. And a lot of awkward phrasing.
    Really? Glad someone tells me this.

  6. #6
    Jester of the Moon Cell's Sovereign Kieran's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seika View Post
    Mph. Needs a good beta-ing. Your tenses are all over the place. And a lot of awkward phrasing.
    True. Still, nice concept - I like sad and sweet, from time to time.
    Last edited by Kieran; February 12th, 2012 at 11:21 PM.
    “Love will be cruel to who it entices — love will have its sacrifices.”

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  7. #7
    Venus Swordman Ergast's Avatar
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    This needs to be continued.

    Spoiler:
    Quote Originally Posted by shiningphoenix View Post
    Rin: "I wanted Saber..."
    Archer: "What? But Archers are all insanely OP, it's like a rule or something, why would you think Sabers were better?"
    Rin: "Sabers are more molestable..."
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    AC!Rin. Fixing problems one moan at a time.
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    Denizens of another dimension, meet Rin Tohsaka, Tsundere of Mass Destruction
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    I dont even know what Lunatique is. I assume it's terrible for the sake of argument.

  8. #8

    Heroic Deed [Extra Scenes] Death

    Disclaimer:

    Characters in Fate Stay Night and Nanoha don’t belong to me.


    Notes

    Similar to my last post, constant reminder that this story takes place in The Fate Route.

    Death

    It was once said that a young boy becomes a contradiction of his ideals as he witnessed death of a certain individual. However, there weren’t any written records that can verify all the details that depict his life story. Because of that, people have been creating countless versions of such tales. This is one of them.

    “Shirou.......’ Ilyasveil muttered. Her fever is as high as ever and no matter how many medicines she takes, she still won’t get better.

    It has been months ever since she collapsed on that hot summer day. People she knew in the Emiya household panicked as they saw her lying on the ground, literally seconds before Shirou called everyone in to have snack. That day brought fear to her Onii-chan as she has never seen him look so scared all her life (apart from her days battling against him with Berserker of course)

    Ilya-chan...” taiga called her name softly, as she places her hand at the sick girl’s cheek.

    Taiga and Shirou take turns looking after her sick girl, mostly Shirou doing the most of the work despite her protest and constant arguments. Luckily, she managed to convince her grandfather to get them a doctor to treat the girl.

    “Where is Shirou?” Ilya asked.

    “He went out. “ Taiga answered softly.

    “Always care for others before himself…….Shirou no baka……..”And with that, her eyes closed as she no longer has the strength to open them.

    “(Sigh in relief) yes Ilya-chan, that is something that the both of us can agree.” Taiga refers to all the moments Shirou use to take care of Ilya, even to the point of neglecting his schoolwork and part-time job despite the fact that the older woman has already volunteered to take care of the sick girl.

    Speaking of sick, it’s almost time for her to eat her medicine., Taiga silently walks to the kitchen to fetch the medicine prescribed by the doctor; thank goodness her grandfather has so many friends they can rely on.

    Scene Break

    There was one time where two individuals that have yet to see what the future have in store in them meet one another at the most simple yet unexpected place.

    That time is this moment itself.

    The first person is Emiya Shirou, a high school senior currently in Midori-ya in Fuyuki city. The reason why he’s in such specific location is due to ad that he saw in the newspaper that features a small yet popular café that sells various sorts of cakes and pastries. He came to the place by an express bus and will be home soon for the afternoon ride. His reason for coming here: buy a cake for Ilya in hoping it will cheer her up.

    Even though there are already cake shops back in Fuyuki city but Shirou stubbornly decides against Fuji-nee’s protest and logical reasoning that the sick little girl might want to try something different for a change.

    The second person is Takamichi Nanoha. She is only 8 years old this year and is currently studying in elementary school. She often help her parents with the Midori-ya and is often labeled as ‘daddy’s little helper’ by her parent’s friends when they comes to the café.

    “Thank you Nanoha-chan.” Emiya Shirou took the box in which contains the cake he ordered

    “Your welcome “She smiled. “Ano...how is Ilya-chan?” Nanoha asked. This is not the first time they meet each other and interact with one another. Before, she once followed her father to Fuyuki city to personally deliver a cake in which Emiya Shirou ordered via telephone. That was the first time she met the sick girl in person. As for her father, she thinks that he may have been a good friend of the deceased Emiya Kiritsugu, Shirou-san’s father.

    “She’s .....” Shirou hesitated. “…….getting better.” He lied. He doesn’t want the little girl in front of him to worry too much about Ilya. From his perspective, Nanoha-chan doesn’t need the extra baggage in her conscious. At the very least, let him worry about Ilya. She is his responsibility after all.

    Scene Break

    Meanwhile, Taiga has just got back from the kitchen, holding what seems to be a glass of water in her left hand while holding a small case that contains prescribed medicine for Ilya-chan. It is almost time for her take her medicine after all. She sighed looking at the sick girl as she can be seen sleeping like a baby or a certain princess from an old fairy tale that Taiga used to read when she was in elementary school all those years ago.

    She’s gonna hate herself later for waking the sick girl up, but she has the obligation to finish her medicine to get better.

    “Ilya-chan, wake up; time to get eat your medicine……”

    No response. Ilya is still in deep slumber as her eyes closed shut, most likely want to avoid eating her meds. This is clearly not the first time it happened. Before, she once outwardly refused to eat her medication until Shirou managed to persuade her.

    “Mou…….Ilya-chan, it’s time to eat your medicine.”

    No response. The girl sure is stubborn. Still, she can’t keep this up forever. Taiga doubts even she is that stubborn that she needs the medicine if she wants to get better.

    “If you eat your medicines, you’ll get better quick and get to play with Shirou.”

    Taiga resorted to persuasion tactic as she really needs to get the girl to eat her medicine. Sure they all taste bitter, but what choice does a sick person have?

    With a sigh, Taiga resorted to pinching her cheek as she can no longer help it. Honestly, pretending to be asleep to avoid eating medicine has got to be-

    “Ilya…….chan?!”

    Taiga’s expression changed. Despite the fact that the sick girl is being pinched at the cheek, she did not make any other facial expression. Her cheek felt slightly cold when she pinched it. Her face was as if frozen with her eyes closed shut and her mouth did not move at all.

    Without even thinking, Taiga hastily rubs the girl’s face to get a reaction, her heart beat faster as she anticipates it.

    Instantly, she tossed away the blanket that was covering her body, knocking the glass of water next to her in the process.

    Finally, she places her hand on her shoulder while her head and ear is on Ilya’s chest to hear her heartbeat.

    In the end,-

    “ ILYA-CHAN!?”

    Scene Break

    Unknown to Shirou, he happily walk towards the bus stop as a smile is engraved on his face. The reason? He’s looking forward to see Ilya’s smiling face when he gets home. He’s sure that the cake he bought can cheer her up. Ever since she’s been living in his house, the Emiya household has been livelier than ever.

    Now, things have mellowed down ever since Sakura died and Ilya falling sick.

    Speaking of which, the express bus has just arrived at the bus stop on time for its next trip to Fuyuki City.

    I sure hope Ilya will enjoy this. He gave one look at cake box he’s holding in his right hand and got into the express bus.

    END

    I actually killed Ilya off, granted she wasn't killed or anything, her time simply ran out. The real problem is that how people react react to this situation.


    P.S In this interpretation, Ilya died in the same month the war took place.
    Last edited by shikyo21; February 13th, 2012 at 10:14 PM.

  9. #9
    Venus Swordman Ergast's Avatar
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    Damn. It was like a kick to the stomach the first time, and it was again the second...

    Spoiler:
    Quote Originally Posted by shiningphoenix View Post
    Rin: "I wanted Saber..."
    Archer: "What? But Archers are all insanely OP, it's like a rule or something, why would you think Sabers were better?"
    Rin: "Sabers are more molestable..."
    Quote Originally Posted by Vigilantia View Post
    AC!Rin. Fixing problems one moan at a time.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sage of Eyes View Post
    Denizens of another dimension, meet Rin Tohsaka, Tsundere of Mass Destruction
    Quote Originally Posted by Christemo View Post
    I dont even know what Lunatique is. I assume it's terrible for the sake of argument.

  10. #10
    Quote Originally Posted by Ergast View Post
    Damn. It was like a kick to the stomach the first time, and it was again the second...
    You, me and everyone else know that ilya is going to be dead soon, like it or not...............

  11. #11
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    What the hell happened to Sakura?

  12. #12
    死徒二十七祖 The Twenty Seven Dead Apostle Ancestors lethum's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mike1984 View Post
    What the hell happened to Sakura?
    That anger...it feeds trolls, Mike. Don't feed the trolls. Send PMs.

  13. #13
    ジュカイン Lycodrake's Avatar
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    I know what happened to Sakura in this, but Shikyo decided to come to BL anyway. I warned him...
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    Yes, excellent. Go, Lyco, my proxy.
    F/GO SUPPORT

  14. #14
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    I see. So, I'm not going to like Shikyo or this story very much...?

  15. #15
    JESUS WANTS A HUG! The Sylentnight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mike1984 View Post
    I see. So, I'm not going to like Shikyo or this story very much...?
    I don't know about the guy, he seems okay.

    The story? ...Probably will NOT enjoy this at all if your looking for Sakura. Fair warning.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rodyle
    It's natural for Rin to surround herself with beautiful women, and natural for Shirou to be everyone's bitch.
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    God, why is it so hard to be a smart ass these days?

  16. #16
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    I've seen the second chapter.

    Let's just say that I don't appreciate blatent Sakura-bashing one bit....
    Last edited by Mike1984; February 14th, 2012 at 07:29 PM.

  17. #17
    Quote Originally Posted by Mike1984 View Post
    I've seen the second chapter.

    Let's just say that I don't appreciate blatent Sakura-bashing one bit....
    In my defence, her death will trigger another event in the future of Heroic Deed. I guess from your point of view, it does look like Sakura-bashing but her death will affect Zouken greatly after this. The fact that you've already read chapter two means you have an idea on how severe the situation is.

    The only thing I can do for you is that I write on how her death is avenged; means that Zouken will be involved in the matter.

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    Honestly, what you write from this point on is irrelevant, because I'm not going to be reading it. I hate it when Sakura is used as nothing more than a disposable plot point. I don't recall ever seeing Saber or Rin getting treated like this, it's always fucking Sakura, and to be honest I'm sick of it. Sure, it may be part of the plot, but it's still pretty clear that you don't give a flying fuck about Sakura.

    Plus, I know nothing of Nanoha in any case (other than that it doesn't do very much gratuitious character-killing like you're doing here...), so my interest in the fic would be pretty low even if Sakura wasn't getting totally fucked over for the sake of "plot"....

  19. #19
    the master of infinite roads lantzblades's Avatar
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    In my defence
    what defence? you killed a major canon character off screen. there's no excuse for that man. you're lucky you aren't crossing fate with marvel or dc stuff because if you were mike's reply would be one of the tame ones.

    write as you see fit but please don't lie to our faces.
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    come join us, Darksidemoon is a new forum for discussion of all things tm

    it is my firm belief that regarding the ban of mike1984 I have been given insufficient reason for the affair and it's conclusion, further than this I feel that the light manner it has been treated in is appalling. It is my sincere hope that he is not regarded in the same way as actually malicious posters who have appeared on beast's lair or otherwise as a joke to be snickered at when spoken of in the future. I will not forget my friend or view him in the manner those in charge here have presented him and his actions, nor will I accept the situation as it stands where people snicker at him as if he were a joke.

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by lantzblades View Post
    what defence? you killed a major canon character off screen. there's no excuse for that man. you're lucky you aren't crossing fate with marvel or dc stuff because if you were mike's reply would be one of the tame ones.

    write as you see fit but please don't lie to our faces.
    I suspect that, if you replaced Sakura with Rin here, he'd get a hell of a lot worse than what I just said. I was deliberately holding back somewhat....

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