Wishing Machine

[MZeroX]

Granted. you know have leafy things that absorb energy on your wood.

I wish I had a new pair of socks.

[Suncofold]

Granted, they're monster socks that slowly devour your body from the feet up.

I wish I had some fapping material right now.

[MZeroX]

denied. your wood is busy making leaves.

I wish I had an ink refill for my "A BIG PEN".

[Suncofold]

Granted. It's invisible ink that cannot be read under any circumstances.

I wish I had a banana.

[HitokiriNanaya]

Granted it's shoved up your ass.

I wish Avi-tan could talk.

[Kuradora]

Granted. Via Grail-kun.
I wish I could touch the sun without getting burned.

[HitokiriNanaya]

Granted however the earth has moved very close to the sun and the earth burns.

I wish people would stop calling me sir makes me feel old

[Sei]

Granted. Everyone now calls you Dog. :P

I wish the dishes would do themselves for once. =3=

[Chaos Greyblood]

Granted, but now you got a Phantasia situation on your house and it'll never stop.

I wish I can play ice hockey as a goalie.

[Sei]

Granted. Your face is now a puck magnet.

I wish I could buy games from the future.

[HitokiriNanaya]

Granted but you have to wait for the system to come out.

I wish that BL would rule the world

[Chaos Greyblood]

^^ Granted, but all games are craptastic and their quality is absolutely dubious.
^ Granted, but now we'll be full of the worst fans the world has to offer and the quality of the boards goes downhill with all the trolling.

I wish.... I wish for true love.

[Suncofold]

Granted. Your one true love is your right hand.

I wish I had some studio monitors right now.

[HitokiriNanaya]

Granted you have the monitors only

I wish for limitless porn.

[Suncofold]

Granted. It's all gay and bbw porn.

I wish I was Justin Beiber.

[Sei]

Granted. The masses now hate you.

I wish these lesbians would stop hitting on me.

[Chaos Greyblood]

Granted, and now you made gay men straight for you.

I wish I was a great sniper.

[Suncofold]

Granted. Have fun at your COD tournament, nerd.

I wish I could see the stars.

[Chaos Greyblood]

Granted. You got hit in the head hard and you're seeing stars.

I wish for some bitches and money.

[Sei]

Granted. Two dogs and four pennies.

I wish I had Avi's optimism.