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Thread: Fishie's Fail Files For Fan Fics Fishie Formulated

  1. #241
    So... Homura is now in Avalon?
    92 minuti di applausi!!!

    Perchè immaginiamo?, ci chiedono.
    E perchè no?, è la risposta più adatta.
    Almeno, questo è ciò che credo io.


    Spoiler:


    CASTER FAN, and PROUD of it!!!!

  2. #242
    call me... senpai deviatesfish's Avatar
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    It will be more evident where she landed later on, but no, not Avalon. She just went back a little further in time.

  3. #243
    不死 Undead biigoh's Avatar
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    backwards in time or side ways? ^_^

    Also, I'm kind of burning with curiosity as to what Madoka wished for.

    I also have a crappy fanfiction.net profile. Oh, the shame of it all.


    "Magic Girls, no matter how frilly their dresses, high their screams, or incompetent their sidekicks, will be treated as the credible and dire threats they are, and I will direct as many, if not more resources to their destruction as I would for a more classical Hero."
    - Evil Empress Guide # 52

  4. #244
    call me... senpai deviatesfish's Avatar
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    The storm was frightening.

    The tribe had come to this forest many cycles ago. Life here was warm. Game was not scarce. The cold times were shorter and the warm times were longer. The tribe had thanked the spirits for guiding them here. The spirits protected this forest from predators, making it a safe place to be.

    But then the storm came. It was unnatural. The winds howled like hungry wolves. The forest changed. It was not green, but dark or light. Predators crawled everywhere. They were with the body parts of bears, wolves, lions and birds.

    The tribe was frightened. It tried to run away, scattered. Many died this way. Then the tribe huddled together, flinging stones and sticks at the predators. Many more died.

    The tribe killed their shamans. It hoped the spirits would be appeased. The predators ignored the shamans. The predators kept attacking.

    Then a spirit came.

    It was glowing and quick. Its legs were black like night and its body was white as clouds. It roared with the power of thunder and killed the predators.

    The tribe was frightened.

    The spirit turned to the tribe. The warriors still alive wanted to attack the spirit in fear. But a youngling approached the spirit. He was a student of the shaman. He tried to appease the spirit.

    It nodded to the boy in return and disappeared.

    The storm passed and the tribe cheered. They raised the boy to be their new shaman. He searched for the spirit. He prayed to the spirit. He called for the spirit. But the spirit did not come.

    The spirit had looked like a woman. But that could not be. Men were stronger. It could not have been a woman, the tribe protested.

    There was another youngling of the tribe who liked the boy-shaman. She was born a few cycles after him. She followed him around and sought his attention. But the boy only searched for the spirit. He believed it to be a female. He had grown to obsess over the spirit.

    The forest was still plentiful, so the tribe did not disagree. It thought the boy was right. It thought the spirit was protecting the tribe.

    And the spirit was.

    Occasionally, the boy would see the spirit return. It would watch the tribe from above the trees. It would not come down and share the fire. It would not eat with the tribe. This frustrated the boy, for he had grown older.

    With age, the boy-shaman discovered something about himself. He wanted to take the spirit. He wanted to make a child with it. The tribe and the warriors found this amusing, but they did not stop the boy. He was useful and he learned the ways of the forest.

    The boy had grown to be a man. He learned what the animals of the forest were. He learned all the plants and fruits. He learned what helped the sick. He had learned many things.

    All this while, the girl watched the man grow. She too had begun to grow into a young woman, but she was still a girl at heart. She still wanted the man’s attention. But she could not compete with the spirit.

    The spirit was beautiful. Its skin was not dark and dirty like everyone else’s. Its hair was sleek and shone in the light of the sun.

    The girl watched the man, but was too afraid of rejection.

    Then she met a beast.

    It was a strange beast that crawled on the ground and hissed in her mind. It called itself something that she could not understand. But it also told her it could fulfill her wish.

    For example, she could wish for the man’s attention.

    And so she did.

    One day, the man approached her. She was happy. She was very happy, but the man did not want her like a male wants a female. The man wanted to talk to her about the spirit. He knew she remembered it. She was one of the few who did.

    She tried everything, even coupling with the man. But afterwards, he would search for the spirit again. He was obsessed. The spirit must know things he did not. The spirit could protect the tribe and teach it more. He would go on and on. Even after she bore him a child, he still only talked about the spirit.

    There was little else to talk about.

    The girl had grown into a woman. She was hateful of the spirit. She was angry at the man. And so she despaired. She searched for the beast-that-crawls again. It was many cycles before she found it.

    She wanted another wish, but it would not give her any.

    So the woman despaired.

    In her despair, her soul blackened and cracked. Her evil emotions turned on her and changed her into something else. The beast-that-crawls was very happy at this, to see her change. It was very excited.

    The woman had grown to become a great beast. She reached taller than the forest and howled like the bear. And with her change, she brought along a storm.

    The storm was frightening. It was unnatural. The winds howled like hungry wolves. The forest changed. It was not green, but dark or light. Predators rose up again, but in the shape of the tribe. They were beasts that slithered on the ground, but hissed in the voices of the tribe. They ravaged the forest, twisting and turning into something frightening. They brought out the darkness and fear of things into the forest.

    The tribe was scared once more. Many still remember what happened long ago. They huddled together and held down the man. They sought the spirit to protect them. They thought the man had angered the spirit in seeking it for knowledge he did not have.

    The man yelled and struggled. But before he was sacrificed, the spirit flew down again.

    The beasts struck at the spirit, but the spirit was never where the beasts struck. The beasts tried to strike everywhere, but the spirit was nowhere. Then the spirit roared like thunder once more. The sound placed fear of the spirit into the tribe.

    The spirit created a trail of dead beasts, and the tribe followed.

    When the spirit finally stopped, it had reached a beast as tall as the forest. The beast had many wings of the birds and many heads of the beasts. In its hands it held a massive stick of fire, the tool of the tribe. It screeched and hissed at the spirit and struck again and again. Each strike would miss and shake the ground with an awful fury.

    The tribe huddled even closer together, shivering in fear.

    The great beast struck down with its teeth and the tribe thought they were doomed. But then the spirit appeared at their side and the great beast shook with the loud booms of thunder again. Many times, it shook, causing the forest to burn and collapse around them.

    And then finally, it was destroyed.

    Color returned to the forest, but it was wrecked. The tribe was fearful of this place. It was tainted. So as the spirit disappeared once again, the shaman led the tribe away forever.

    The tribe would remember the forest for its abundant bounty and the tribe would not pass down the tales of the great beasts, hoping no more would follow. But stories are always passed down.

    Legends all begin somewhere.

    Many, many centuries from then, the shaman will be remembered as a man named Adam. And the woman would be remembered as Eve. The details of their life would slowly fade away with each retelling, until they would only be remembered for living in a paradise called Eden.

    And what happened to the beast-that-crawls? It also faded into myth and legend, because only the woman could see it. She had told people about it, but no one really believed her. They blamed her for this whole mess. After all, the greatest trick of the devil is to convince the world that it doesn't exist.

    As for the spirit, well...
    Last edited by deviatesfish; July 31st, 2012 at 11:37 AM.

  5. #245
    Drunk Anime Is The True Path. Mattias's Avatar
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    So either Homura's God, OR some kind of Archangel....

  6. #246
    call me... senpai deviatesfish's Avatar
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    People interpret things... hm! Anyway, this is like, 120,000 BC. So from here, we move forward slowly to the present.

  7. #247
    不死 Undead biigoh's Avatar
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    Interesting... HomuHomu is way back... but wait... that's a Witch being created.

    I also have a crappy fanfiction.net profile. Oh, the shame of it all.


    "Magic Girls, no matter how frilly their dresses, high their screams, or incompetent their sidekicks, will be treated as the credible and dire threats they are, and I will direct as many, if not more resources to their destruction as I would for a more classical Hero."
    - Evil Empress Guide # 52

  8. #248
    call me... senpai deviatesfish's Avatar
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    Well

    If she appeared when the first Witches were created and didn't notice them or chase after them, she'll have to deal with those consequences when later humans need Puella Magi to defend them against such things

    Also interesting to see her figure out that without Walpurgis Night hanging over her, she could kill all the potential Puella Magi to prevent Walpurgis Night and other Witches from appearing

    And thus, further she goes into her downward spiral...

  9. #249
    不死 Undead biigoh's Avatar
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    Indeed... or kill the puella magi as they appear.

    I also have a crappy fanfiction.net profile. Oh, the shame of it all.


    "Magic Girls, no matter how frilly their dresses, high their screams, or incompetent their sidekicks, will be treated as the credible and dire threats they are, and I will direct as many, if not more resources to their destruction as I would for a more classical Hero."
    - Evil Empress Guide # 52

  10. #250
    後継者 Successor
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    So... are you going to finish any of your stories?

    >gonnna bug you

  11. #251
    call me... senpai deviatesfish's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Uxion View Post
    So... are you going to finish any of your stories?
    I'm doing whatever I like.

  12. #252
    call me... senpai deviatesfish's Avatar
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    Kotomined

    Rejoice!

    … Or not really, that would be fine too. Honestly, I’m not rejoicing at all, despite all that had happened today. You probably will not believe me if I told you, but if you meet me face-to-face, then perhaps… well, I feel silly. Let me start from the beginning…

    I had woken up sometime today, hours from now, to a world of wrong. It was hard to describe how wrong things felt, but if it had been in terms of this crazy ‘Nasuverse’, then it would have been a Servant named Wrong with the class of ‘Wrong’, with all of its attributes as wrong, a personal skill of ‘Wrong – EX’ and a noble phantasm called ‘Wrongest wrong, wrong to ever wrong’ that made everything wrong to an unimaginable level that could have been in no way measured. Or… well, it might not have been so bad, but at the moment I woke up, this did not feel like an exaggeration.

    I have read about out-of-body experiences, such things like switching bodies and the like, but honestly who has actually experienced such a thing? To have put it into simpler terms, I woke up in a body that I did not go to sleep in. Did I ever mention my incredulity at this ever happening to anyone? Blinking, stretching—even breathing—all felt wrong. The body I had gone to bed in was the body that I had been with all my life. I didn’t really think I need to explain that this is my real, original body, but… well, whatever happened, this new body was larger, taller and far more muscular.

    When I tried to blink, instead of moving my eyelids, I was twitching my cheeks. When I tried to jump out of bed, I was left with a body of cramped muscles, all pulled in a painfully weird way. I even very nearly suffocated too. For several moments, I couldn’t even control my breath, choking up and falling into a ball on the floor.

    I grasped for breath, twitching left and right, flailing in confusion and agony. The first breath I took tasted musty and stale, as if the room I woke in had not been cleaned in years. I nearly choked on the dust in the air, but having very nearly died from somehow being unable to breathe, the air tasted wonderful nevertheless. Breathing and moving are instinctual. It wasn’t hard to adapt to larger muscles and a strangely shaped body…

    With my breathing problem fixed, I allowed my mental processes to wander onto other things. Where am I? How did this happen? How do I fix this? Why do I feel so weird…? I felt as if my mind was clouded compared to the previous night and my heart kept aching yet… it felt as if I had nothing in my chest at all…

    In addition to suddenly waking up in a larger body, I felt… weird. It was so simple why though, when I felt my chest and then felt lower. Ugh. This has to be a weirdly realistic, yet utterly stupid nightmare. It can’t be anything else… right?


    For a moment, I wanted to curl back into a ball and rock myself to sleep, but my curiosity got the better of me.

    I looked around the dark room. It was rather dull and empty of things, other than simple furniture and some Christian or Churchy decoration. I wasn’t a Church-goer, so I didn’t know the difference anyway. Whatever, it wasn’t like it mattered...

    “Hm…” I grumbled. Whoa. My voice was deep. Intellectually, I knew the body was a… a… eek! Bad thoughts, bad thoughts!


    I reached down again and touched my stomach. Then I touched my sides. Then I touched these shoulders, these biceps, these thighs… the room was spinning. Or maybe I was just started to hyperventilate. My soft skin, all the hard work I put into being the way I was… ah! Ahh!!

    “Aaaahhhh!!!”

    I passed out.

    It was not long until I woke up again. I mean, it must have only been a couple of minutes, but it could have been an hour or two. Whatever the case, I saw some light filter into the room I was in. I heard birds outside chirping merrily like not a damned thing was wrong in this world… I reached up and grabbed the nearest thing—a picture frame—and threw it outside.

    There was a soft warble before something heavy fell to the ground. Then something light fell and let out of a last whistle before dying. There.

    Now… try to remember what happened…

    I must have gone back further and gone insane, because this nightmare of being a man was not ending. Instead, I’m starting to see the memories that were not mine. These memories… oh. Oh no. Oh, oh please no. No.

    No, no.

    I jumped out of bed—this time correctly and without pulling half of the muscles in my… this… body—and rushed to the window. Opening it, I saw that the room was much better furnished that I had thought, only I had been somehow seeing the room despite there being no light inside. I looked out of the window.

    There it was… that disgusting picture. It was right next to a bird with a smashed face. It was the picture frame containing a picture of Kotomine Kirei.

    No, no… nonono.

    Noooooooooooo.

    “Aaaahhhh!!!”

    I passed out again.

  13. #253
    Evil Good RadiantBeam's Avatar
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    Freaky Friday body swap?



  14. #254
    死徒(上級)Greater Dead Apostle hatori's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by deviatesfish View Post
    It came out of nowhere.

    "Rin, can I touch them?" Shirou approached her quickly, with a deathly serious expression and in lightening-quick steps. It was far too fast for her to even do anything but reaction.

    Her arms rose unconsciously to cover her chest as heat grew around her nape. She tried to hide it, to act nonchalant, especially since they were in the middle of school, but it was hard to not show any reaction. And it showed too, when she stumbled upon her reaction, "W-what?"

    Shirou's eyes sharpened dangerously, his glaze was like the golden glare of a hawk that never looked away. Secretly, she would not even admit to herself how that look left her panting at times. But she is Tohsaka Rin and she has a reputation to uphold. It didn't help that she stilled stuttered, however, "D-d-do you think I am some loose harlot like m-my sister, Emiya?!"

    This time, she had a reaction, but not the one she was looking for or the one she was expecting. He blinked at her, as if completely confused about what she had just said, but she knew better than to let her guard down so easily against a lady's man like Emiya Shirou! He seemed to contemplate what she had said by cupping his chin and muttering, "What does that have to with any..." but he cut himself and looked back at her. She had to give him points for never taking his eyes off her face, but then he said, "But Rin, they look so firm and bouncy."

    She nearly saw red right then, "Y-you crass beast, I--unph!"

    Before she could explode and take her anger out on him, he took a step forward even faster than before and grasped her shoulders with his hot, firm hands as if he had just teleported inches away from her. He leaned in and she could feel his warm breath brushing against her lips when he implored her, begging her and looking deep into her eyes, "Please, Rin."

    She squirmed what little she could within his rough yet gentle hands, but she knew she had no way out. The hallway was nearly empty, with most students already outside for lunch. They were relatively secluded here in this corner, she thought to herself, and it wouldn't be bad at all if it was Shirou. Even so, her modesty or her feminine instincts caused her to look aside, not quite downwards, but certainly avoiding his determined, burning glaze. She couldn't help but stutter more than the last, "A-a-a-a-a-alright..."

    It was as if she had just agreed to something so naughty, she wanted to bury her face into her palms. She had no doubt that she was completely red now; she was feeling the heat from her neck to her cheeks and all the way up to her brow. It was just so...

    ...then Emiya reached up and started stroking her hair, or more specifically her twin ponytails (AN: also known as twintails). He played with her hair, oohing and aahing, feeling the bounce of her hair delicately, as if he was handling her body.

    Then Tohsaka Rin truly saw red.

    a whole new twist to "USE YOUR HAIR"
    I shall serve thy cause, upon my honour, till thy death.
    -Avenger/Jester. Trinity Series.
    Destined Legacies, shamelessly rewriting it since 2010

    When I go random.


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