What it takes to win (Fate/Stay Night, EXTRA, Zero and Apocrypha)

[Guy]

Do you have a link for this? I've heard of it, but I haven't seen​ it.

There used to be a semi-translated one (only the fight was translated), but it was deleted.

But here is the link to the untranslated in case you are one of those weird moonrune readers.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=diUHQEIkL1s

Starts at 1 min and 5 secs.

[VoidHerald]

There used to be a semi-translated one (only the fight was translated), but it was deleted.

But here is the link to the untranslated in case you are one of those weird moonrune readers.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=diUHQEIkL1s

Starts at 1 min and 5 secs.

... I need to add a similar scene in the story.

[Knick]

All hail the king baby

[Agailius]

Hell or Heaven! EXPLODE!!

[kuniKaiRoe]

... I need to add a similar scene in the story.

People... and Servants... and some jerks... are going to die.
This has approval from this end.

[Ars Poetica]

We already knew and agreed that Gil would be a badass from start to finish in this fic. If anything, that little clip has given the author some ideas... As Beta, it shall be my duty to see these ideas realized as absolutely and efficiently as possible! Go forth, O Void Herald! GO! And I shall follow, ye!

[G-Man]

My God, this story is crazy awesome (Aoko and Shakespeare; Shakespeare and his interaction with everyone else period; Shuwen and Nero flirting; Vlad is the bad guy's Bro-Lancer; everybody is just great)! Learning Void is actually Kageseo just made it even better for me! I love "Echoes"! One of my favorite Naruto fanfics ever and it isn't even finished yet!

You don't know Void Herald very well, do you? He's also known as Kagaseo. He wrote a 'Naruto' story called "Echoes". It has a trope page. It is Grim Dark as fuck. And, guess what, I'm this story's beta.
Don't hope for happy things to happen to people, you're better off hoping that bad things happen to everyone. And that was the message from your friendly Beta, Ars Poetica. Have a nice day~!

What? Echoes is an awesome fanfic that admittedly has dark moments, but I don't think its grimdark overall. It has grimdark moments but the overall tone of the series seems more hopeful than dark to me. Yes, there are tragedies, but their are also triumphs (for every dark and unsightly world there are worlds where the gang sees its possible for them to live happily and in peace), and Amaterasu and Zabuza's scene was perfect! I would never have thought I'd emphasize with an even eviler incarnation of freaking Uchiha Madara, but damned if Amaterasu's final speech didn't leave me thinking "He was complete and utter scum... but damn was he crazy awesome and no one can deny he lived according to his principles, however ruthless and nihilistic they may have been!"

But, in most cases, it is best for the story.

A story where you know who is going to remain alive can get boring, fast, especially fanfiction, where you know how most characters will develop. The ideia that anyone can die makes a fic more interesting.

Exactly! I have yet to read a fanfic that kills Rin off before the very end and in a non-dramatic fashion, and have only ever seen a snippet that dared to kill Archer off early on.

Well, yes, that is often true, but it does tend to lose you the support of the fans of the characters in question.

Also, it's very rare to see a fic in which Rin or Arc die (except when virtually everyone does), and Saber dying is far rarer than you'd expect given that she's a servant (who have a survival rate of 1/21 based on canonical True Ends...). They're just too popular for authors to kill them unless they have an exceptionally good reason for it. The characters who die meaninglessly are always ones like the maids or Sakura, important enough for it to hurt but not popular enough for the author to be hated for it.

Yeah, Arc's problem is she's kind of unkillable most of the time. Its why I actually prefer seeing her in comedic scenes that let her childlike character shine. In actual action scenes she's kind of boring. Few authors have the guts to kill off Saber, Rin or Archer in anything less than some dramatic fashion, and they usually go out like Big Damn Heroes. I was actually stunned by Hisui and Kohaku's deaths at first because I honestly didn't expect them to die. The only reason it didn't evoke a greater reaction out of me is because I only ever read the various Tsukihime/Melty Blood manga where they weren't very important to the plot save as joke characters. I simply don't have the emotional investment in them, especially not in this fic where they didn't get many scenes before kicking the bucket. Did Hisui even get more than one speaking line? Like Mike said, if anyone is killed off to try and make the plot darker, its usually them or Sakura and it gets a little old after a while.

Yeah, for a good example, look at Zouken. Nasu tried to make us sympathise with him at the end of HF, but I don't think it worked for very many people....

It certainly didn't for me. I kept thinking... "That's it!? You did all this horrible sh*t because you wanted to bone Illya's ancestor and decided that seeing the Grail used was the best way to honor her memory... and then you just give up!? What weak sh*t is this!?!?" Its even worse because the Nasuverse doesn't have an actual Hell so he isn't even going to be punished for his sins!

Maybe, but it would have made Zouken a more memorable villain, comparing to the orthers Big Bads ,Gil and Kotomine, he was a pretty weak villain, with a more sympathetic, or better implemented backstory, he would be a better character.

Gil and Kotomine are just as mostrous as Zouken, perhaps even more (they do evil things for fun, while Zouken is more about pragmatism than malice), but they have a sympathetic backstory and are all around awesome and Zouken sucks.

Nothing about Gil and FSN Kotomine's backstories are sympathetic. At best I can empathize/sympathize with Zero Kotomine because he was truly disgusted with himself over his inability to be good, but FSN Kotomine didn't evoke that reaction out of me. He was still an awesome villain, but not sympathetic.

... I need to add a similar scene in the story.

There will be plenty of opportunities given the hit Janne put out on Gil's head! Just replace the shadow monsters with a bunch of Servants belonging to extra Masters we don't care about!

[VoidHerald]

My God, this story is crazy awesome (Aoko and Shakespeare; Shakespeare and his interaction with everyone else period; Shuwen and Nero flirting; Vlad is the bad guy's Bro-Lancer; everybody is just great)! Learning Void is actually Kageseo just made it even better for me! I love "Echoes"! One of my favorite Naruto fanfics ever and it isn't even finished yet!

What? Echoes is an awesome fanfic that admittedly has dark moments, but I don't think its grimdark overall. It has grimdark moments but the overall tone of the series seems more hopeful than dark to me. Yes, there are tragedies, but their are also triumphs (for every dark and unsightly world there are worlds where the gang sees its possible for them to live happily and in peace), and Amaterasu and Zabuza's scene was perfect! I would never have thought I'd emphasize with an even eviler incarnation of freaking Uchiha Madara, but damned if Amaterasu's final speech didn't leave me thinking "He was complete and utter scum... but damn was he crazy awesome and no one can deny he lived according to his principles, however ruthless and nihilistic they may have been!"

Exactly! I have yet to read a fanfic that kills Rin off before the very end and in a non-dramatic fashion, and have only ever seen a snippet that dared to kill Archer off early on.

Yeah, Arc's problem is she's kind of unkillable most of the time. Its why I actually prefer seeing her in comedic scenes that let her childlike character shine. In actual action scenes she's kind of boring. Few authors have the guts to kill off Saber, Rin or Archer in anything less than some dramatic fashion, and they usually go out like Big Damn Heroes. I was actually stunned by Hisui and Kohaku's deaths at first because I honestly didn't expect them to die. The only reason it didn't evoke a greater reaction out of me is because I only ever read the various Tsukihime/Melty Blood manga where they weren't very important to the plot save as joke characters. I simply don't have the emotional investment in them, especially not in this fic where they didn't get many scenes before kicking the bucket. Did Hisui even get more than one speaking line? Like Mike said, if anyone is killed off to try and make the plot darker, its usually them or Sakura and it gets a little old after a while.

It certainly didn't for me. I kept thinking... "That's it!? You did all this horrible sh*t because you wanted to bone Illya's ancestor and decided that seeing the Grail used was the best way to honor her memory... and then you just give up!? What weak sh*t is this!?!?" Its even worse because the Nasuverse doesn't have an actual Hell so he isn't even going to be punished for his sins!

Nothing about Gil and FSN Kotomine's backstories are sympathetic. At best I can empathize/sympathize with Zero Kotomine because he was truly disgusted with himself over his inability to be good, but FSN Kotomine didn't evoke that reaction out of me. He was still an awesome villain, but not sympathetic.

There will be plenty of opportunities given the hit Janne put out on Gil's head! Just replace the shadow monsters with a bunch of Servants belonging to extra Masters we don't care about!

I am always happy to see fans of my other stories for Echoes, it's mostly the tone is rather cynical, with an underlying hope. Earn Your Happy Ending kind of story.

Anyway, time for next chapter.

Due to having gone to uni, I am afraid my updates will be rarer than usual. Maybe one per two weeks at best.


Anyway, thanks Ars Poetica for betaing and being an all around fun fellow to talk with.


Disclaimer: I don't own Type Moon, but I own the plot, occasional and rare OC, and... that's all.

Day Four
Little Drop of Peace

Emiya Shirou was pissed, shocked, and in denial over the latest events. "This is the craziest day in my entire life, period."


"Why? I could see the action coming from a mile away," Shakespeare pointed out, tasting his cup of coffee on the seat behind Shirou's own, "I mean you are the protagonists. Obviously, you are a magnet for disturbing events. You should read more stories."


Even as Shirou's complaints died in his mouth – as they would no doubt only serve to make the Servant comment towards his growing sarcastic attitude – the waitress put his own cup in front of him, "Shirou, when I told you could come whenever you wanted, I didn't mean it literally. It's three o'clock in the morning."


Aoko grinned and started quoting the café's motto, "The best coffee, the seven days of the week and twenty-four hours per day! It's written on the door."


The waitress simply cursed. "Gotta change it immediately," she said, leaving the group alone to chat. "As if Taiga wasn't enough…"


"So you work in a coffee shop, Emiya?" Leo asked his very person as regal as ever, "Yet, you have a guardian and an orphan allowance."


"I prefer not to depend on others." After the metro incident, the oddly-assembled party had gone to the coffee shop to talk with Leo, awakening the owners in the process. Fortunately, they had become friends and had taken the unusual demand quite well. He guessed they hadn't received many customers ever since the recent troubles.


"That's a wise decision, Shirou-kun," Aozaki spoke. The Masters had taken a table, leaving the Servants to occupy the one next to their own, "Depending on others makes it hard to face difficulties for the first time. Talking from experience, independence is very enjoyable."


"I always thought men preferred comfort and stability over freedom," Leo stared at Aozaki, "You might be the exception confirming the rule."


Shirou narrowed his eyes, brushing off the meaningless conversation. "Leo, I didn't get to ask it, but… why did you save us? Aren't you trying to win the war?"


The European blinked, "Of course I am trying to win, but it doesn't dispense me from helping others in need. Although in this case, I did not know about Gilles de Rais's activities until you explained them to me. As for Gawain, I'd sent him to find you because I wanted to speak on friendly terms. Is it truly that surprising?"


"Wait, you want to win the war?" Aoko narrowed her eyes, "Not stop it?"


"Why stop it? An omnipotent artifact could improve the world, even if there is a price to use it." He didn't seem bothered by the 'kill all Masters' bit. "The Grail could be the answer to many, if not all, of the world's problems. It can end all wars, cure all diseases, and eradicate poverty… It could shape a better world."


"At the cost of thousands of deaths," Shirou pointed out while Aozaki's expression only grew darker.


The young man simply shrugged his shoulders, unfazed. "Emiya, if you could improve the lives of billions at the cost of only a few thousand, would you perform that sacrifice? The Grail can make the world a paradise. My dearest wish is to create a perfect world… And I shall serve as its king. Who better to take upon such a great burdon and prize? Obviously, such vision requires I dirty my hands with blood… I would gladly sacrifice my own life if I could save the masses, for this is what a true king would do."


"Your argument's invalid. Those thousands of people who would die to save the many would not ask to perish. They would die unknowing. And they would not die easily. Their lives would end for the sakes of people they did not know… and at the desire of a person they did not know. You would wish to be king of a utopia built upon innocence lost and the abandonment of their choice to live. Such is not a king. You'd be a tyrant," she hissed. Harway didn't react in the slightest, only watching her with a cool expression, "All lives are precious, Harway," Aozaki whispered. "And have you no knowledge of the Grail's history? It has been corrupted into an engine of destruction. Any wish you make that would demand sacrifices would take far more than it would give, a wish for a utopia lacking in war, disease, and poverty would likely destroy everything."


"The former Grail was corrupted, and is, as a result, still disabled. The new one looks rather efficient, if it summoned this Ruler Class Servant to limit destruction."


Shirou felt his blood freeze, and Aoko stared at the blonde intensely. Leo smiled, obviously amused by their obliviousness, "The Fuyuki Grail is still disabled, my friends. This war's Grail is another, completely unrelated to the first. Angra Mainyu cannot corrupt it, and as such, no wish shall be twisted."


"How can you be so sure?" Realization hit Shirou's mind, "You're… Are you one of the organizers?"


"Of course not," he almost chuckled, "I am no magus." Leo took his cup and drank half of it, unconcerned by the others, "My family, however, has close links with the Clock Tower. The Harway are a powerful political dynasty, and it is us who makes sure most of the 'incidents' in Europe stay secret. Of course, this is a closely hidden connection. When I was selected by the Grail, I asked a few contacts for help."


Aoko frowned, "The Association shut down the Fuyuki Grail. What sense is there in helping to restart it?"


Leo shook his head and proceeded to correct her. "Lorelei, queen of the Association, shut down the Fuyuki Grail. Aozaki Aoko, you of all people should understand how the politics in the Clock Tower work. Many factions couldn't care less about the Grail's nature and did their best to have Lorelei's decision nullified, without result. I believe some well-connected magi hid the Einzberns and the Makiri from the Association and I suspect most people in charge of watching Fuyuki closed their eyes when they installed the new Grail. The man in charge of surveillance may want the Grail to never rise again, but not the magi under him."


The Harway finished his cup and posed it on the table, "From what I gathered from my contacts, I feel I know who helped making the whole situation stay under the Clock Tower's radar. The Einzbern and Makiri built a new Grail in Fuyuki to replace the former. They just… tweaked the rules a bit. The result is this war."


"That's completely impossible," Aozaki snapped, "Firstly, replacing the core isn't something that can be done on a whim. It's like messing with an atomic reactor! Secondly, gathering enough prana to summonforty-nineServants, in ten years, is ludicrous. Thirdly, the Grail's creators had the help of the best magician in the world when building it. A second Grail couldn't work unless…" she paled, "Unless it's a pale mockery of the Grail that isn't made to last beyond the war."


Shirou understood, "One war would inevitably attract this Lorelei's attention, and it would be bad news for everyone involved. Why bother making this new Grail stable? It would be dismantled, anyway."


"Even if that explains some aspects of our situation it still doesn't explain how it can work at all," Aozaki whispered. "Have you no information in regards to that, Harway?"


"Unfortunately, no… yet what I have gathered is enough. The Grail can and will grant its owner's wish without twisting it." Leo stared at Shirou. "I have already made my decision, but I would have wanted to discuss something of this nature with noble Masters. If you have summoned Arthur Pendragon, your heart must be pure."


"Pendragon?" Aoko's eyes widened and she stared at Saber, "Saber is King Arthur?" The swordswoman nodded, and the sorceress fell from her chair laughing, "Arthur is a woman!"


"Marvelous!" Shakespeare chuckled, "It would be a wonderful plot twist in another story. Strange, I had started writing a comedy with a strange premise too, but never got around to publishing it…"


"Truly?" Saber blinked. "A comedy?"


"Yes… it involved an undying black knight and a murderous rodent. I wrote it while I was drunk and it was too ridiculous to put on stage… but it wasn't so bad that I'd burn it. So I buried the script where nobody could possibly find it. I came to favor tragedies, later on."


"Anyway," Leo cut in, staring intently at Shirou, "Why were you dragged into this war? What was your wish?"


"I… I want to realize someone else's dying wish," Shirou explained. Very suddenly, Aoko stopped laughing. "My adoptive father died having lost his daughter, and I promised I would find her. The war helped me do it, as she has been selected as a Master," he finished his coffee, pondering about his next sentence; "I hope to stop the war before we are forced to fight."


Leo's eyes flickered, "Your goal is indeed noble, yet you do not grasp why winning the war would be good for you. With omnipotence, bringing this girl back from the dead would be easy. However, a part of your answer bothers me. You want to realize someone else's wish. Have you no personal desire?"


Shirou stopped dead on tracks, pondered an answer, and found none. "No."


Aozaki, who had risen up and put her chair back on its place, eyed him as if he was a strange wonder, "Shirou, have you no personal desire? Really, genuinely none?" she prodded.


"I…" he felt uncomfortable. How could he explain to them his situation? "I have no desire of my own. Actually, what makes others happy does not bring me any joy."


"Well if what makes others happy doesn't do the same for you… what makes you feel happy?" Leo asked.


"I… well, I feel happy when I help others," Shirou grinned sheepishly, "My wish would be to grant the wishes of others."


Silence.


"I am not the best placed to judge you, Emiya. However, I find your way of living… very unique. If I understand well, you cannot make your own happiness, so you derive it from helping others?" Leo's voice was as serene as ever, as if they were discussing the weather, "I think I understand why it is that you summoned Arthur and not another Servant. If you had lived during the Middle Ages, certainly you would have been the perfect knight."


Aozaki narrowed her eyes, "Shirou-kun… you have a very warped mind." Her words were blunt.


The words made him flinch, and Leo eyed her, "And you, Aozaki? What is your wish?"


"I intend to stop the war, but if I had a wish to make, it would be to bring back all those who died fighting in it. I believe everyone deserves a chance to live," she sighed, "Why bother? I will do my best to prevent anyone from winning… That includes you, Harway."


"I truly desire to fight the both of you. I am sure it will be interesting," Leo spoke, rising up, "It is late, and I have to return home. It was nice talking to you."
"Leo… I'm not going to kill you," Shirou spoke, "I'm not going to kill anyone."


Leo's expression was incomprehensible. For all of a moment, his serene face had fallen into an expression of surprised astonishment, "Emiya, is it that you do not understand such a simple fact? Or, perhaps, are you so deep in denial that you cannot accept it? You have no choice in the matter. You either die or you do what it takes to win. In this war, there can be no middle ground."

Break

"And so, my actions doomed you to death, King Arthur." Gawain's expression was the very picture of shame. "I could not let go of my hate for Sir Lancelot, and it ended tragically."


Arturia smiled at her former knight. She couldn't bear seeing him blaming himself like this. "Sir Gawain, it is my fault and mine alone that Camelot fell. I didn't see the darkness growing in Mordred's heart and the dissent amongst my subjects. It was my fault as king, and mine alone."


"Saber-chan, that wasn't your fault," Tamamo whispered, taking her hand, "I myself have faced betrayals, and it isn't the fault of the betrayed one. Sometimes, people do stupid things for stupid reasons."


"No matter if you were a king… you were still the oppressed one," Spartacus nodded, "Mordred was the oppressor, and you found the strength to slay him with your badass invisible sword."


"King Arthur, my dearest wish was to see you flourish as a true king, and you did," Gawain bowed slightly, "I was honored to serve you until the end, and I regret we cannot fight together again. You had become the truest king, one whose heart was pure and devoid of evil. It is us knights who did not live up to your example."


Arturia shook her head, "If I hadn't started a war against Lancelot and left Mordred's hate to fester-"


"Lancelot rebelled. You did your duty in dealing with his betrayal, King Arthur," the knight of the sun smiled sadly. "I sinned by refusing to forgive my brother's killer, while you pardoned him. Sins can be forgiven, but they must be punished first. As for Mordred, by his very birth he was Morgane's tool to doom our country. Nothing could have prevented his fall."


He rose up from his chair, and knelt in front of the surprised Arturia, "I am sad to learn you blamed yourself and took upon yourself to bear the weight of our sins. King Arthur, you were the perfect sovereign, the one Britain did not deserve, for you were too pure for this land. None of us Knights of the Round Table regretted serving under you."


The blue Saber shook her head, remembering her dying wish, "Someone else would have done a better job than I did. Another king could have averted the fall of my kingdom."


"No, King Arthur, no one could have done better than what you did for all of us." Gawain rose up, "No king would have been as pure and honorable as you. You have given up on your life as a human being for our sake, and we did not return this sacrifice. No one expects anything more from you."


He closed his eyes, lost in his thoughts. "When we were alive, I and Sir Bedivere used to argue over you. I wished for you to flourish as a king, and he, for you to flourish as a person. You have become a true king in life and made the ultimate sacrifice. Maybe this new life is your reward – the opportunity to flourish as a human being."


Arturia's jaw dropped, astonished. Gawain, the knight who always looked up at her for being the selfless king, wanted her to become a normal woman? To be honest, she had never even pondered the possibility.


"It is unfortunately time to separate… Sir Arthur." Arturia's eyes went wide. Not calling her his king but his equal, Gawain rose up and stood next to Leo, "Enjoy the time you have left in this world. I am afraid we will have to duel in time… but I look forward to seeing you let go of your guilt and find happiness."


"It was an honor seeing you all," Leo spoke, leaving the coffee shop, "We shall meet again."


Spartacus nodded, and rose up. "I need to leave, I have to return to my Master, report, and scream my awesomeness for all to hear."


"Aren't you supposed to be my bodyguard?" Shirou frowned at him, "And who is this Master of yours?"


"My Master is the magnificent yellow beast of Fuyuki. Master wants the 'reveal' to be epic, and I, in the meantime, to beat oppressors to death with my BADASS OPPRESSOR-KILLING SWORD!"


Yep. Spartacus may talk, but you couldn't understand what the hell he was saying. Perhaps it was the result of Mad Enhancement?


"Finally someone understands this story's conventions!" Shakespeare smiled, "It must be a named character with a rather minor role, until the big plot twist…"


"I will return to protect the oppressed when the time comes to run into oppressors," Spartacus said, giving a tap to Shirou. The boy fell on the floor, "In the meantime, man up. Eat a few lions for breakfast and be awesome."


"Er… alright…" The teen rose up back on his feet. "Thanks for saving us, by the way."


"It is no problem! I am a badass ally of justice." The gladiator then left through the door… which was closed. He didn't even seem to bother.


"MY DOOR!" The waitress screamed.


"I will repair it," Tamamo promised with a sheepish smile, "Caster to the rescue~!"


Aoko sighed, "Shirou-kun, you really have a gift to attract the attentions of strange people."


"Of course, he is the protagonist. His presence causes the plot to unravel."


She turned to slowly regard him, "Shakespeare, you've called more than half the people we've associated with, including me, main characters. In a story, shouldn't only one person have that role?"


"Au contraire, Master! There are several cases where a story has multiple main characters, with a central one."


"Shakespeare. Shut up."


Ignoring the Aozaki and her Servant, Saber turned to face her own Master and Caster. "Shirou, Caster, I… I have taken a decision." Both stared at her, waiting for her answer.


"I will tell you my story. All of it."

Break

Medusa was getting antsy, "Atalanta…"


"I do not understand…" the huntress hummed the air, trying to pick up a scent, "The tracks have completely vanished. It isn't normal! I've never seen anything quite like this… It is as if she had… vanished."


"Give up," Hassan snapped, having lost patience, "We have been seeking for your trophy for hours without result. For all you know, she could have the ability to transform. Hell, she could be one of us… she could be you, she could be me, she could even be-" he ducked to avoid a swipe from Medusa, "Too slow. In all seriousness, however, she has clearly found a way to escape without leaving tracks. We have to report our failure to your Masters – Now."


Atalanta hummed one last time and resigned herself to returning. Medusa could understand her reaction. The Archer prided herself as the ultimate hunter and tracker. For her to have lost a track was a deep humiliation, "Do not worry, it is a new species," the Rider comforted her, reminding the huntress of her own words, "It may be one of her abilities."


Atalanta nodded in appreciation, although with slight reluctance, "I will find her again," she promised herself with a hint of pride, "No one escapes Artemis' priestess."


The trio went on to their Masters. They found Sakura and Satsuki in a street, discreetly spying on a group. Medusa instantly recognized Servants among them. Satsuki politely smiled at the three Servants, whereas Sakura kept observing the group. Medusa lowered her head in shame, "I apologize, but Shiki escaped." The Dead Apostle lowered her head in disappointment.


"A duo of Servants interrupted our operation," Hassan added, "We have gathered important information needing discussion. Tohno Shiki is a Master and has a Servant of his own."


"Ah…" Satsuki blinked, "Wait, does that mean-"


"Grandfather will find a way to take the Command Spells," Sakura cut in absentmindedly. She hadn't stopped watching, "He devised them, so it's only natural that he can. He has even found a way to make another container."


Medusa left her bike and walked next to her Master. "Something bothers you?" She asked with worry in her voice. "And… container?"


"The teenage boy is tainted by Angra Mainyu." Medusa opened her mouth and closed it almost instantly, focusing on the only minor boy among them. He was somewhat handsome, but otherwise hadn't noticeable… traits… like Sakura herself, "I think it's his circuits. But whatever it is-"


Hassan narrowed his head, "Mistress," he cut in, "Your grandfather is coming."


Medusa repressed a growl of anger and barely restrained herself from striking when the disgusting worm-man appeared out of nowhere to join them. After what he had done, having Pegasus run him over could only be an act of justice.


"You have found yourself quite the interesting ally, Sakura," Zouken chuckled, politely nodding at Satsuki and Atalanta. The first was more surprised than anything, whereas the second's expression was cold, "I hope you have gotten along well with my granddaughter, Dead Apostle. Otherwise, I might have to hurt you a bit."


"I am a friend of Sakura's," Satsuki grinned ear to ear.


Atalanta eyed the magus with cold eyes, "So you are Makiri Zouken?"


"Yes-"


An arrow pierced his head. Then another impaled his heart and a third struck the area between his legs.


Only the Masters present were surprised. Hassan sighed, and Medusa smiled with no small amount of joy. Satsuki stared at her Servant in shock, "Why?"


"He's a child abuser," the huntress spat on the worm-person; "It only serves him right."


"That hurts, Archer," Zouken snorted from a head that was in crawling pieces, not sounding truly disturbed. The parts of his body destroyed by the arrows regenerated while pieces blown off moved back into place almost of their own accord. He was indeed as hard to kill as he was heartless, "Worse, it is useless. You cannot kill me in any way."


The huntress looked ready to disagree, her bow in hands, but Sakura interrupted the situation. "Grandfather, you made a third container. That boy there is tainted with Angra Mainyu's mud."


The magus narrowed his eyes, "You are the only container I ever made, bar an immobile one kept in a safe place." He tightened his grip on his cane. "If there is another container, then it means either the Einzberns have plotted behind our backs or a third party is involved. I will investigate, as it might be the reason why you did not receive any Servant's souls. Meanwhile, keep an eye on this one and try to identify who he is."


"Who made you the leader?" Atalanta growled.


"I am simply an adviser," Zouken lied through his teeth, a sly smirk all over his face. Medusa repressed the urge to change it into a scream of pain, "And as an advisor, I'm just showing you the right direction." He turned his back on them, and left. "Now, please excuse me, I have to investigate on the Einzberns. Good evening."


Medusa glared in the Makiri's direction, vowing to discover a way to kill him permanently. If Atalanta's face was to be trusted, she had the same idea in mind.


Hassan sneezed loudly, uncaring, "I suggest some of us fake befriending them, whereas I would keep an eye on Tohno, in case another opportunity shows up. Mistress, miss vampire, as you both aren't Servants, you would be better suited for the task."


"Ah… fake friendship?" Satsuki looked rather unhappy. "It would be horrible." As she didn't have many friends, it was probably a taboo for her. Medusa could understand.


"Fine, you can be friends with him for real and try gathering as much information as you can. Zouken said nothing about betraying or killing him." He absentmindedly caressed his dagger, "Only when we have enough information can we fight to ensure victory…"

Break

"Oh, dear Ireland~!" Diarmuid and Cu Chulainn sang together, completely drunk and a chop of beer at hand, "How much I miss you~! Knights and girls to meet our spears, the both of them~!"


"You can show me yours anytime, handsome," a waitress, a pretty raven-haired girl said, kissing Diarmuid's neck and sitting on his legs.


"Lancy-san, my room is just above…" the barmaid, a red-haired woman, told Cu Chulainn, before she started making out with him, much to Dan's horror. He couldn't cover both Ilya's ears and eyes at the same time, "Let's drop these silly clothes and play Irish bunnies."


"Irish bunnies?" Ilya asked, reddening.


"Yes, it's a card game involving bunnies," Dan lied through his teeth, glaring at the Servant. The Lancer didn't even notice, threw his chop to the ground, seized the woman in his arms and proceeded to climb the stairs, not even waiting to tear apart her clothes. Diarmuid followed with the waitress, although he had the decency to stay fully clothed.


"Want a Chinese cocktail?" Shuwen asked, having replaced the now occupied barmaid. He was the only Servant who hadn't touched alcohol yet, "Powerful enough to send you to heaven or hell with a good taste?"


"Heaven," Julius said, still looking at the stairs, "I need to be very drunk to forget that."


"You misunderstand, slow-witted student. I meant the true heaven, as you may die upon drinking it."


Julius stared at Shuwen, then at the stairs, then at Shuwen again. "I will take my chances."


"Your funeral," the Chinese gathered a few ingredients from the bar and started mixing them, "Blackmore, little girl, what shall be your command? There is quite the stock in this establishment." Dan knew it well. He had noticed this one, when he had taken Diarmuid on a walk the former day. They had taken a drink there, his Mystic Face having given them access to free beers.


Sometimes, being a girl magnet had its advantages.


The old man, after a short moment of pondering, took one of Shuwen's non-lethal cocktails whereas Ilyasviel asked for lemonade. The Chinese barman looked above the Masters and at the two remaining Servants. "Girl, giant… want a drink?"


"Later!" Nero hardly spared him a glance; her arm occupied matching Heracles', "He is slipping!"


Yes, she was actually having an arm wrestling contest with the Berserker. Surprisingly, she was holding her ground. What had she said when the duel had started? "I can strangle lions with my bare hands just like him! Time to see who is the greatest: the emperor, or the god!" Dan couldn't help but hold the Saber in high respect, in spite of her intolerable lack of decency.


Speaking of decency, they started hearing moans and shouts coming from the floor above. The old soldier forced himself to smile at the confused Ilyasviel, "These, my dear, are the bunnies. It is part of the game."


She glanced at him, not buying it in the slightest. "Can rabbits shout "Oh, yes! Faster, Lancy!" while imitating people's voices as well?"


"They can, if trained well." You idiot, not even five year old would believe what you just said! "They can even kill knights with their razor teeth."


Julius snickered, "Dan, you've watched Monty Python one time too many."


Ilya put a finger on her lips, before grinning ear to ear, "Or maybe they're just making babies."


Dan stopped dead on tracks, "Wait… you know about… the nasty?" At that moment, he realized she was aware of what was happening since the very beginning and just mocked him.


She blushed heavily, "Oh, don't act so prudish… Mom and dad had forgotten to close the door. I was seven."


Oh my god, the images… "To think I was trying to preserve your purity…"


"Speaking about it, why did you do it old man?" Ilya's expression was undecipherable, and her tone had turned serious, "I was supposed to kill you, or your friend could have shot me at any time. Why treat me nicely?"


Dan paled. Shuwen glanced at the girl for a few seconds, and Julius simply snorted, "I guess it was why that dirty woman just conveniently interrupted me? You sent her to kill me; unfortunately, she was too wild to obey," he took a breath and sighed, "Dan asked me not to shoot you."


"Shooting you from afar would have been dishonorable, and a duel between soldiers is sacred, in my mind." Dan smiled. "As for treating you nicely, why shouldn't I have? The fact that we are enemies does not mean I should be cruel to you. We may die tomorrow, so we can make our precious time comfortable."


The little girl stared at her lemonade, "I have an enemy that was nice. Grandpa said he was cold and vicious, yet he saved my life even if I craved for his death. I… I was confused, so I decided to change my mind and vent out my frustration."


"By killing us?" Julius snickered, "Someone needs anger management classes."


Ilya ignored the jab, finding her lemonade fascinating. Dan crossed his fingers, "Lady Ilyasviel, my experiences have taught me that information coming from a tier may not be the most objective." It reminded him of the time a friend had told him of a very ugly girl who turned out to be both very attractive and Dan's future beloved, "Your grandfather may dislike this person and presented you a bad vision of him or her as a result."


"You believe grandfather lied?"


"Maybe he would dislike you to befriend that person, or he thought it would make it easier for you to kill. There are many possible causes."


The girl stared at him with a confused expression, "What should I do old man? Should I make grandfather say the truth?" She was asking him for advice, of all people?


She probably hadn't had much experience with human contact, he realized. If she was a noble, she may have been sheltered all of her life.


Dan replied honestly, "You should go see this enemy and talk on friendly terms, if you can. Then, trust your instinct. You will feel it… who is lying."


Shuwen nodded, "Your sixth sense will tell you the truth, even if you may deny it. Intuition never lies. Yet, sometimes, the truth is harsh to accept."


Ilyasviel stayed silent for a few seconds. Dan could almost read her mind. She was pondering whether following the advice or not. In the end, she left her seat. "Heracles, Nero, we are returning home."


Although the Berserker obeyed, as mute as ever, Nero was downright distraught. "Why? I did not get to show my love for all!"


"You are leaving without a fight?" Shuwen asked. He sounded disappointed.


Ilyasviel smiled, "I like you – Especially you, old man. I wish to let you live, and to see you again," she waved her hand and exited the bar, Heracles at her side, "Bye-bye~!"


Nero cursed under her breath, before pointing a finger at Shuwen, "I will surely defeat you in the arena next time!" she promised, leaving as well.


"Quite the interesting bunch," Dan whispered, once alone with his two teammates.


"We will have to kill them at a later date, Dan." Julius' words were cold and harsh. "You better not grow fond of the girl, or you might regret it in time."


"You are right, unfortunately," the old knight stared at the lemonade. The girl hadn't even touched it, "It's just… I would have liked having a daughter like her. We had planned to have a child, before my beloved passed away."


Julius said nothing and simply handed him a new and welcomed chop of beer.

Break

"Saber-chan, if I understand it all, you faked being a man to rule the kingdom of Camelot, under the name of King Arthur? You ruled well until, one day, a knight betrayed you?"


"I formed a group of heroes, the Knights of the Round Table, to protect the people." Saber breathed heavily, as they reached the apartment complex' entrance, "Gawain and Lancelot both belonged to them. The second fell in love with Guinevere, my queen. She knew I was a woman but renounced her personal life for the sake of preserving the ideal government we had built. She, however, fell in love with Lancelot and when the affair was discovered I had no choice but declare war on them to quell dissent. I held no grudge against them and I regretted my actions, but it was the law."


Caster listened patiently. Yes, it was the law. If another woman would steal her future husband, she would probably go to war with her to get her beloved back.
"Another knight, Mordred, gave the final blow to Camelot. He was obsessed with the idea that he was the most fit to succeed me and when I refused, seeing he would make a tyrant, he planned the fall of Camelot… and it worked. The people thought I was unfit to be ruler and rebelled. We ended up killing each other in a final duel and my kingdom died with me. It was all because I'd failed to win my people's trust that this happened."


Everyone stared with sympathy at her. Shirou put a hand on her shoulder, "It wasn't your fault, Sabe- Arturia. You couldn't have seen it coming."


"Master Shirou is right," Caster smiled cheerfully, "It's your people who failed you, not the opposite. They have shown only ungratefulness for all the efforts you made for them."


"It was a tragedy," Shakespeare nodded, "You couldn't have done anything against the plot."


"For once, I agree with my Servant," Aozaki scoffed, "Has seeing Gawain changed your mind?"


Saber nodded. "I always thought I had failed Britain, but if the Knight of the Sun, the man whose dearest wish was to see me flourish as a king, thinks I did the best job possible… I'll have to think about it."


Caster grinned and took her hand, "Saber-chan, I will help you as much as I can… to find your new way."


"I promise I will help as well," Shirou smiled. Aoko simply gave her a light tap on the back.


For a moment, Saber's face was the very picture of happiness, "Thank you… your support really touches me."


Shakespeare gave into a sly grin, "I need a pen. Inspiration struck me like never before!"


The group went on to return to their respective apartments. They were tired and looking for beds. Especially Caster, whose use of her Noble Phantasm had drained her more than she thought.


So when they opened the door, only to see a redhead giant waiting for them, they were just a little angry.


"Hey, boy, you should put some wine in the cabinet or beer in the refrigerator," the giant said, unfazed by the glares sent at him, "I found none."


"Iskander, it was extremely impolite of you," a knight in white spoke, joining him. He knelt in front of Shirou, "You have my deepest apologies. We are sorry to have broken into your home, but we had no choice. My name is Saint George, Rider class, and this is-"


"Alexander the Great, Rider class," Arturia cut in, observing the surprised giant, "You may not remember, but we crossed paths in the last war. We even had a banquet with another Servant."


"Sorry," the giant grinned sheepishly, "The Grail erased my memories. Were we friends?"


"No."


"Can we be friends then?"


"… I reserve my decision for a later date."


"You truly are a magnet to the bizarre, Shirou-kun," Aozaki whispered.


He ignored her in favor of the more immediate issue, "What the hell are you doing in my apartment?" Shirou said as he glared at the two Servants potently.


"How did you disable my traps?" Tamamo was enraged, "I spent hours making them!"


Saint George lowered his eyes, rising up, "Our Caster ally, Medea, disabled them. She is unfortunately not in the state to answer you, so you will have to wait quite some time."


"Medea?" Shirou blinked, "She's here?"


"I…" Saint George took his breath, "I believe images will speak better than words."


They found this Medea in the main room, cradling a man's corpse, as if he was still alive. Tamamo heard Shirou mutter something under his breath, "Kuzuki-sensei…"


"A few hours ago, a group of Servants assaulted the Ryuudou Temple, killing everyone inside," Saint George spoke with a sad tone, "Our respective Masters hiding there did not survive the night. We were the only survivors."


"Issei?" Shirou lowered his eyes in worry, "Ryuudou Issei? Is he dead too?"


"My deepest condolences, boy," Iskander's voice was serious, in stark contrast with his previous behavior, "He was a good lad and a friend of I. His brother was my Master, and his father George's. They, the monks, your teacher, all friends of mine… Their deaths will be avenged."


"You were the only Master who Medea had learnt the location, Emiya Shirou," Saint George explained to the distraught boy, "We came here to make a proposition to you and your neighbor." He touched his sword's pommel. "Please, will you be our new Masters, so justice can be served? We are fading away, and the fog only gives us a bit more time."


"Er, I doubt I can support three more Servants…" Shirou whispered sheepishly, turning to face the second Master in the room, "Aozaki-san?"


"Me neither, but… if I take two of them, and you one, making three Servants each, we should be able to prevent them from fading away, until we find a better solution," the redhead explained. "However, I would like to ask a few questions to be sure it's not a ploy to kill us in our sleep."


"I understand your fear, but you must realize we are putting ourselves at your mercy, lady Aozaki." Saint George stared at her Command Spells. "It will take only a few words for you to kill us, or prevent any lie from us."


"Then…" Aozaki trailed off, scratching the back of her head. "Who wants to go with whom?"


"I refuse to share an apartment with… him," Medea pointed a finger at Iskander.


"I have enough girls in my apartment, I would prefer a male roommate," Shirou spoke. Tamamo nodded. Problems would arise, especially if that Medea proved to be hard competition.


"I unfortunately need to be with Iskander to… restrain his excesses," Saint George cut in. He observed Shirou, "I understand your worries for your chastity, have no fear. God will surely give you the willpower to resist the temptation of the flesh."


"Hey, you misunderstand, it's not –"


"Then I and George will take this woman as your Master, and Medea the boy," the Rider suggested. "Has anyone objections?"


Shirou slapped his face with his palm and held it there for a second, "I have, but I also have the feeling nobody is going to listen." He sighed. "I will take my futon and sleep in the main room, on the floor."


Aoko chuckled, amused by the Emiya's reaction, "I have Shakespeare. You can't possibly be much worse. The name's Aozaki Aoko, by the way."


"Do not tempt fate, my friend," the playwright whispered ominously, "Never tempt the author, for it will make you pay with blood."


Shirou stared at Medea, and then at her dead Master, "Does it satisfy you? Or would you prefer to stay with Aozaki-san?"


The Caster snorted, "I don't care."


"Then, it is settled." George knelt before the redhead sorceress, "I, Saint George, Slayer of the Dragon, ask to take Aozaki Aoko as my Master."


"I, Iskander, King of Conquerors, demand you, Aozaki Aoko, to take me as your Servant."


"As a Master, I accept both of your requests," Prana swirled around the two Servants, the contract being established. Aoko visibly slumped at its dissipation, "Phew," she exhaled, "You both take a lot out of me… Don't be gluttons; I'm going to need rest after tonight's battle."


"We shall take only the bare minimum," Saint George promised.


"Sounds good… Now, before anything else… sorry, but I have to make sure you aren't planning to backstab us." Aoko raised her hand, "On the power of this Command Spell, I order you, Saint George: never lie to me. Ever." The symbol shined and vanished, "Okay, so… was everything you said the entire truth?"


"Yes. We lost our Masters and we have no intention of ever causing you harm. Our desire to join you is genuine. We will not stab your back, we promise."


"Then I officially welcome you to Team Blue!"


Shakespeare rolled his eyes, "Team supporting characters, my dear. I insist on the term."


"Give me some time, boy," Medea spoke, whispering words. Kuzuki's corpse vanished in light, "Goodbye… Souichirou-sama," she rose up and turned to face Shirou, "To think we would meet again under such circumstances… do not mistake my intentions. You are only a way to further my revenge. This alliance is out of necessity, nothing more."


Both Arturia and Tamamo glared at her, but she ignored them. Shirou didn't look very surprised, "Medea-san, I… I would like to give you my condolences. Kuzuki-sensei was a good teacher, and a good man."


The Caster stayed silent a few seconds, her expression sad. Then she returned to her usual cold demeanor and scoffed, "Just confirm the contract. I, Medea of Colchis, accept to take Emiya Shirou as my Master."


The Emiya sighed, "I, Emiya Shirou, accept to take Medea of Colchis as my Servant."


Tamamo felt her own prana influx being reduced by half, as energy swirled around the blue-haired witch. She felt so weakened she could hardly repress a sigh of pain. Her Master immediately rushed to her help and supported her. "Tamamo, are you alright? You look ready to faint!"


"I'm fine," she lied. His face made it very clear he wasn't convinced, "Well, I might have overtaxed myself a bit…"


Shirou smiled, "You need a lot of rest," he said, turning to face Saber, "I will take care of her. Meanwhile, could you show Medea to her new room?" The swordswoman gave him a slight nod and took the other Caster away.


Tamamo was then led to her bed by her Master, and laid down on it. Shirou stood still and observed her. "Caster… you shouldn't push yourself so hard. I appreciate it, but your health is one of my top priorities."


"It's nothing," she grinned, happy her Master was so considerate of her. Her former one hadn't been as helpful, "I will be more careful next time."


"I hope so," he grinned, "Thank you for having saved us… Tamamo-no-Mae."


The witch grinned. "Nice name, eh?" She bit her lip in worry. Was he going to reject her? "Aren't you afraid? I mean, I have the reputation of being a man-eating monster in Japanese folklore, if you are familiar with my legend."


"Who cares about your legend? You saved me not once, but twice. No matter who you might be, you are my friend. That's all that matters… even if you are a nine-tailed fox."


She purred with fake anger, inwardly happy he didn't care about her identity, "Fu~! I may not look like it, but there was once a time I could create thousands of soldiers from my multiple tails! As you are a good Master, most of my powers are sealed. Under an evil lord, I would have become one of Japan's great disasters and a hero-killing monster."


He raised his eyebrows, "Is that why you cannot turn into your spirit form? Is it because you aren't at your top?"


"Unlike most heroes, Tamamo is a truly heavenly spirit," she corrected him; "Being summoned as a Heroic Spirit and contained into a Caster form was already a feat. Turning a godlike being into spirit form is nearly impossible."


"Heavenly spirit?"


"I used to live in the celestial plains, but I grew curious of humans." Tamamo abandoned herself to nostalgia, remembering the first time she had looked upon mankind, "Tamamo wanted to see what it felt to have friends, so Tamamo descended upon the world and became a being of flesh… I joined the imperial court, but people discovered my nature and killed me… even when I just wanted to befriend them."


Shirou's expression turned sad, and he took her hand, "You befriended me, and you befriended Saber. That will not change, I promise."


The Caster blushed slightly, "Master Shirou, could I ask you a favor?" she crossed her fingers, "Could you spend the night there? Just… be here? Your presence calms me."
Shirou nodded and stared at the room's second bed, "Alright, if it helps to make you feel better…"

Break

The Tohno mansion put Rin's own house to shame. There were multiple richly decorated bedrooms, paintings, one large floor, and even a Jacuzzi. Yet, it felt off, "You have established a Bounded Field, Semiramis?"


"Yes. I am disappointed that you noticed it so easily. Being summoned as an Assassin did no good for my skills," The queen of Assyria touched the painting of a Samurai. Rin realized it was probably one of the field's main focal points, "If you are to install yourself here, we could work together to better it, lady Tohsaka."


"I am not that talented with Bounded Fields." If she had, Rin would have disabled Roa's system as soon as she could have. Now, Ciel was probably wishing she was dead, and they had suffered a painful and bitter defeat.


Rin clenched her fists, cursing her own foolishness. She had been too overconfident, and she had almost died. Next time… next time, she would save Ciel, and she would not fail.


The Assassin smiled deviously, "Interesting."


"You are happy to have found interesting information, in case we have to fight?" Semiramis had made very clear, when they had formed a contract that she was on Akiha's side and hers alone. She would not hesitate to get rid of Rin in a heartbeat if the Tohno asked for her head.


Rin sighed. She had wondered about using a Command Spell on the Assassin, until realizing she would better gain her loyalty another way. Damned Command Spells, they were so precious it hurt. Semiramis smiled, enjoying the magus' discomfort, "Archer was looking for you."


"Truly?" she grinned ear to ear, deciding to tease the woman back, "Maybe is this why he refused to let your recharge his prana… he wanted me to do it."


"It isn't my fault if your Archer has sadomasochist tastes."


Rin glared at her potently, "Your weapon is a whip, if I remember right? Between the two of us, you are the sadist."


"I thought so, myself… But you really are pushing for the competition. Maybe you're frustrated by your lack of success in life?"


"I expected better from someone as regal as you."


"There is no such a thing as a low blow, lady Tohsaka."


"Watching you engaging in a verbal war is extremely entertaining, make no mistake," Both girls stared at Archer, who had recovered from most of his wounds and was standing there, a smirk all over his face, "I, however, need to talk to Rin."


Semiramis gazed at the Servant as if he was some kind of disgusting eyesore, bowed slightly at Rin, and took her reverence. The Tohsaka couldn't repress her curiosity, "What did you say to her to have her despise you that much?"


"Well, when she proposed to recharge my prana by… you see… Let's just say that having an unstoppable force meet a very movable object; I wondered out loud if it was time to jump through the window and run away screaming. She reddened, glared, slapped, kicked, and slammed the door behind her – not necessarily in that order."


Archer: When you need to ruin all chances for a relationship in record time and never look back.


"Do you fear women?" Rin grinned, "Is all this bravado a lie?"


"Rin, if for example you had made the proposal, I would have accepted. But Semiramis killed her husband for a throne. Bedding a black widow is just asking for trouble." He stopped when he noticed Rin's red face. "What?"


"You said you might have accepted if it was I who had made the proposal?" He paled, horrified, making her grin ear to ear. I am SO going to pay him back for all his disrespect toward me… "You were faithful to me?"


Archer pinched his nose. "I just said the dumbest sentence of all my life, afterlife and future reincarnations."


"Little Archer is under my charm, I see," she approached her lips from his, stopping a few centimeters away, "You know, I might reciprocate…"


"It's a nightmare," he pinched his arm… hard. "It isn't. Shit!" The Servant locked eyes with her. "I should warn you… if you wish for a jerk war from me, you will get it. And if you say, 'make love, not war', and I know this is what you are about to say, I'll kill you on the spot and go ask Emiya to take me as his Master."


Rin barely repressed herself from uttering the sentence, "What did you want to talk about?"


"The truth," he gave her a poker face, "I lied to you. I remember everything about my first life."


She gritted her teeth and pointed a finger at him. "You jerk! You made me think I was an incompetent magus!" She managed to calm herself. "Is it about this Counter Guardian deal Roa spoke of?"


Archer nodded, and led her to his room. "Please sit on the bed. I am going to narrate you a long and crazy story, my own story. You will probably not believe it at first, but it is the entire truth. Please do not interrupt."


Is his legend truly that unbelievable? She sat and waited, "I'm all ears."


The Servant took his inspiration, "Well, first thing, my real name is Emiya Shirou. Yes, that one. He's a redhead, by the way, he just dyes his hair black – Probably to look like Kiritsugu, our adoptive father. I come from an alternate universe where I won a normal fifth Holy Grail War where only seven Servants participated, the Association never disabled it. We teamed up and won after killing Kotomine and Gilgamesh. Afterwards, I became known as a nameless hero, but I kept screwing up big time and the world shat on me. I died like an idiot, after having begged the world for a miracle."


Rin stayed silent.


"Problem: the price for a miracle was working as a Counter Guardian, aka killing several people to make sure mankind as a whole is not threatened. So, I came to regret having been idiotic enough to accept in the first place. When you summoned me as a Servant, I, after remembering a few films with time travel as a plot point, hatched a devious evil plan to create a paradox by killing my past self while engaging in a villainous rant. This would erase my being from existence and give the world the middle finger at the same time. I got to laugh one last time, end of the story."


He grinned, "Problem: This is, quite obviously, NOT the war I experienced myself. So I dropped the plot. Since I was summoned, I believe I was sent to stop a worldwide menace, and if Roa knows who I am, then I can guess who the worldwide menace in the first place is. Oh, and I lied because I thought you might screw up, due to being a grade-A Tsundere with anger management problems," his poker face returned full force, "That should be all."


Dead silence.


"Archer…" the Tohsaka trailed off, shaking her head, "Either you are the biggest asshole I've ever met, or you are saying the truth after lying all along to me. In both cases, I am going to hurt you badly all of creation will feel it."


"Well, it was worth a sh-"


And she kicked him in the balls, in a perfect, gracefully brutal motion.


She was the one who cringed, however. Archer, meanwhile, maintained his poker face, "Rin, I know you more than anyone else. I could see it coming from a mile away, so I reinforced my balls so hard that they gained a consistency more akin to steel. I told you that you would get your jerk war."


The. Fucking. ASSHOLE! "Archer… Troller, whatever… What is my father's name?"


"Tokiomi."


"When's my birthday!"


"February fourth."


"My favorite jewel!"


"Trick question. You're low on cash so any jewels are welcome."


She growled. She wanted something… anything to prove that he wasn't who he said he was, "Who's my sister?"


He was quiet for a moment. His eyes looked… sad? "Sakura. Matou Sakura."


Rin was very quiet. "Ah…" she breathed, "I… I see… it seems you are saying the truth… that, or you're reading my mind."


"I would have gone mad already."


It was a welcome distraction from the topic she'd brought up. Ignore the jab, ignore the jab! Don't kick balls of steel again, it will only make him laugh! "And the Reality Marble?"


He smiled. "I have an amazing talent for projecting weapons and Noble Phantasms to the point that I assimilated myself to them. The Reality Marble is a reflection of my warped and sharpened mind."


The magus remembered the field of blades, and then she froze. An idea had struck her mind. "Any weapon? Any at all?"


"Oh, this is the 'I have an awesome idea in mind' face," Archer chuckled, "Most weapons, except gunpowder. I can't make guns. Shields, armor… But my specialty is mostly found in swords or objects with a bladed edge."


"Could you make one from blueprints?"


"Oh? Nothing harder? Yes, I can."


She couldn't repress a smile. "Archer, if you manage to do the job I have in mind for you, I promise to stop criticizing you behind your back."


"Why do I have the feeling you will only continue criticizing me, but openly this time?"

Break

The mansion felt off. Empty. Even her room was now sinister.


Without the maids' presence, Akiha didn't feel at ease inside the place. Kohaku's fake cheerfulness, for all it was worth, gave some semblance of activity to the mansion, and Hisui's presence was comforting. Now, both were dead, never to return.


Semiramis entered, snapping Akiha out of her thoughts. "I take back what I said about this Archer. He is definitively rude and impolite." The Tohno was not privy in the details, but it was obvious the queen's pass at Tohsaka's Servant had failed miserably, "His mistress is the same. Her politeness is a veneer hiding her grouchy true self."


Akiha couldn't care less. Tohsaka had helped them against SHIKI and was still willing to maintain their alliance. That was all that mattered. Her former brother would pay for what he'd done, "You must learn to tolerate them, if we are to cooperate. Tohsaka is now your Master."


"No need to remind me of it," the queen sat on the bed, next to the Tohno, "Do you still think about them?"


"I…" The Tohno lowered her head, "It was I and SHIKI who should have died, not them. The crimes of my family against them should have been punished." What her father had done would taint their name forever. Yet, in death, Makihisa had won: his family had survived, escaping justice.


"I did not know my former Master for a long enough time to learn her story, but… could you inform me of these crimes?"


Akiha took her breathing, "Kohaku told you the Tohno had demon blood in their veins?" The queen nodded. "Well, sometimes, it awakens brutally and turns us into ravenous monsters. You have seen my former brother… what he has become; this is the fate that awaits all Tohno. We call this the Inversion Impulse." She shook her head. "I have already shown symptoms."


"The red hair?"


"Yes. In time, it will be permanent and I may lose my mind to the demon blood," she narrowed her eyes, "Kohaku and Hisui… they belong to a rare kind of humans called Synchronizers. They had the ability to regenerate one's life-force by bodily fluid exchange. My father adopted them because this power could stop the Inversion Impulse. Drinking Kohaku's blood in small amounts allowed me to halt my transformation, but there is a more efficient, brutal way… and my father frequently subjected Kohaku to it. I suspect he even gave her to SHIKI, in the hopes that it would make him return to normal."


"Lady Akiha, you do not imply he-" The Tohno nodded, making Semiramis bit her lower lip in disgust, "Hisui too?"


"No. Kohaku took it all upon herself, hoping to preserve her sister," Akiha clenched her fists in rage, "One day, I discovered what was happening. I renounced my father and took Kohaku away. My father perished a few days later."


"What about your brother? The real SHIKI Tohno?"


"He had his Inversion Impulse when he was a child and almost killed Nii-san," she didn't need to clarify she was talking about her adopted brother; "It is why he has anemia. My father… elements made him think SHIKI could return to normal, so he locked him into our mansion's basement until he could be cured. Meanwhile, as Nii-san shared the same name as SHIKI, father altered his memories and made everyone believe he was his real son, in order to sweep the whole disaster under the table."


Semiramis put her index on her lips, "Your father may have had knowledge of magecraft. And SHIKI ended up escaping?" she locked eyes with the Tohno, "Or… was he released?"


Akiha smiled sadly, "Kohaku all but admitted she had freed him in the hopes that he could destroy the Tohno. He murdered father, of that I am sure. I thought he was about to do the same to I and Nii-san, since his victims were girls who looked like me, but he suddenly fled to Fuyuki. Not soon after, Nii-san and Kohaku were branded as Masters, and we connected the dots."


"SHIKI was selected as a Master and had a wish to be granted," Semiramis whispered, "This Roa, too. If your brother is sharing his body with another spirit, it might explain why he has two Servants instead of one."


Akiha had come to the same conclusion, when Tohsaka had explained the situation in detail, "If I understand well, a powerful magus is possessing SHIKI. Maybe are they cooperating?"


"Lady Akiha, someone is obviously pulling the strings." The Tohno stared at the Servant, whose expression had darkened. "Even with Roa influencing him, your brother was too insane and obsessed with revenge to simply decide to participate on a whim. He must have been coached by a third party, probably this 'friend' of his who took over my former Master's body. Only a magus from the Age of the Gods or a Caster could pull something like that off."


"If we capture SHIKI, we could interrogate him. He might-"


Semiramis put her fingers on Akiha's lips, making her stop, "Your brother has returned – your adopted one, with his Servant. He is at the gates, with companions."


She didn't even let the Assassin finish. The Tohno left her room and ran toward the mansion's door, opening it.


"Akiha," Shiki smiled. His Lancer and two unknown people were standing behind him. "I'm back-"


She hugged him, and she heard him gasp. Kami, whoever, thank you… "Nii-san, I thought you were dead…" she whispered, a few tears in her eyes, "Where were you?"
"It's… complicated."


"You will explain later." Akiha glared at the two newcomers, a pink-haired woman and a man with a lecherous smile. "Who are they?"


"Hired guns," the girl spoke, "We caught the lad getting attacked by villains, and they fled with their tails between their legs when they saw us."


"You did not inform me you had such a beautiful sister, Shiki." Akiha blushed slightly at the man's compliment. "Next time, do not make her cry." He nodded at Akiha. "My name is David, King of Israel, and this is my partner, Rider." Semiramis chose that moment to materialize next to Akiha, catching the lecher's eye, "My, my, quite the dark beauty."


"King David, you said?" The Assassin smiled, "And here I thought God punished your womanizing habits."


The king's expression darkened. "I see you are familiar with my legend. Recognizing beauty is not a sin, simply a temptation. I have vowed to resist it, for it caused my fall and pain for good people." He returned to wear his good-hearted grin. "Plus, I enjoy teasing girls. It puts a smile on my face."


"I suppose teasing must be part of the Archer package," Rider snorted.


David chuckled and made a reverence. "Please excuse us, but fights are probably happening, and we have to keep peace."


"See you next time, lad," the pink-haired girl said, following the man as they left in the fog.


"Servants?" Akiha guessed, narrowing her eyes. "Who attacked you?"


"I have no idea. There were three, a masked man, a biker and a blonde. They knocked me out, tried to kidnap me, and failed thanks to Karna and these two."


"A Rider, an Assassin, and an Archer," the golden Lancer spoke, "A woman haunted by her past, a man without a name, and a huntress with the heart of a bear. This is what they are in the inside."


"As for where I was…" He scratched the back of his head. "I accidentally hurt someone and had to take care of her until she could recover. My phone didn't work, so I couldn't inform you. I thought about coming to the mansion, but then these three Servants attacked."


"Her?" Akiha narrowed her eyes with slight jealousy, "You were with a girl?" She blinked and stared at the Lancer. "Wait… Karna? You are Karna, the son of the sun?" The man nodded and gave into a small shrug, as if it was no big deal.


"Yes, it was a foreigner," Shiki nodded, oblivious to her thoughts, "Akiha, I was with her when I was attacked, but she completely vanished. I, Karna, and our saviors spent hours trying to find her, and we failed. I'm worried she might have been abducted or worse," he stared at Semiramis, "Do you think you could help in finding her?"
"Maybe," the Assassin replied, "I need some time to try locating her."


Akiha bit her lower lip. "Shiki, a tragedy befell us tonight, when you weren't present. We… we walked into a trap."


The Tohno frowned, "What happened?" He blinked. "Wait… where is Hisui? And Kohaku?"


Akiha locked eyes with him, making her decision. "Shiki… I think it is time for you to learn our family's dirty secrets."

Break

"Why such a face, Dracula-kun?" he could almost picture himself a mocking grin in his head, "All the temple belongs to us now."


Vlad Tepes glared at the cellphone in Jack's hands, "Are you the Devil, to possess those girls and take pleasure in their pain? And I am not Dracula." Curse Bram Stoker, his book had tainted his reputation beyond repair. Why did that novelist take him as an example for his vampire character?


The voice simply chuckled, "The Devil? No… I am all the world's evils and then some," a pause, "If you truly want to know who I am, then… call me Seraph-kun! Appropriate, no? The devil was an angel, once upon a time… Anyway, congratulations are in order! You have done a wonderful job securing the temple, my friends. This deserves praise!"


Vlad stared at the temple's stairs, which had been overrun with spikes. To be honest, access to the mountain was now nearly impossible, "I have surrounded our new base of operation with my Noble Phantasm. I, however, need more Prana to maintain it."


"Hijacking the leylines would do the job easily," Chaos stated. The demon had retaken his usual human shape and discarded his true bestial appearance. SHIKI was standing next to him, new red marks on his arm, "It was not easy, but I have successfully extracted the Command Spells from the dead Masters and implanted them, as you wished."


"With Dracula-kun's Noble Phantasm active, and Frankenstein-chan keeping the gates, the temple is now the surest place in the city. You won't be bothered during your job, Roa-kun." A pause. "SHIKI-kun, is the other guy listening?"


"Why did you kill the maids?"


Vlad eyed his Master in slight surprise. He appeared to be sane for the moment. The voice's answer was… distasteful. "Why bother knowing? If I remember well, Kohaku-san was nothing more than a bedwarmer to you." SHIKI staggered, as if he had been slapped. "All the time you used her Synchronizer abilities to free yourself from your impulses and nightmares, calling her Akiha? I saw it all in the girl's mind. Do you remember the pain? The blood? The screams?"


"It… it was father who forced me to…" he held his head in denial, "It was the demon blood, not me! I never wanted it!"


"Who cares? It was a toy, you shouldn't care. She didn't serve you anymore, so I got rid of her for you. It happened. No big deal." Vlad couldn't repress a sneer at the jovial tone. Such callousness is disgusting…


"SHIKI-kun, all she desired was to become a doll to forget her own feelings. I granted that wish. Hisui wished to share her sister's fate. I granted that wish too. They got what they wanted, we got the temple. Everyone is happy."


"But-"


"SHIKI-kun…" Seraph trailed off, "I fear you made a mistake. These girls are happy. I granted both their wishes. That is my purpose. In time, I will grant your wish too, because we're pals." The voice became soft, "I can remake fate so that your father died of heart attack before he could ever touch little Kohaku. I can make sure you never succumb to your impulse, allowing you to become the Tohno head. Shiki will never steal your place and your sister shall love you and call you brother again. So please, forget about these broken toys and stay my playmate."


SHIKI was torn inside. Vlad could almost read his thoughts. On one hand, that Seraph's promise was attractive, and they were all aware it could keep up its end of the bargain it. On the other hand, it would cause him to dirty his hands with oceans of blood.


In the end, hope prevailed, "The other guy is listening."


"Excellent. Roa-kun, this job is the reason I went all the trouble to make sure you were selected as a Master. Under this temple lies a cave which is the core of the previous Grail system. I want you to alter the magic circle on the walls to suit my purpose."


Vlad narrowed his eyes, "What purpose?"


"Why, but to have my wish granted! Of course, I will grant all of your own wishes in the process."


"The other guy wants to ask why he was chosen, and not another," SHIKI pointed out.


"The task at hand needs an expert in many fields, and mostly in Numerology. Roa-kun, you'd be surprised at the amount of candidates I had. Some were willing to work for me, but lacked the skill… others had the skill but not the motivation. Of all the candidates, you were the only one sufficiently strong enough, skilled enough, and knowledgeable in Numerology that I could rely on… and you were the only one I knew would obey me." The voice chuckled. "However, you will need a body with stronger magic circuits. So in my graciousness I've prepared one just for you."


The fog grew thicker for an instant, and then dispersed. An unconscious blue-haired woman materialized in front of them, lying on the ground.


"I will transfer your soul into Elesia's body within the night, while the rest of you seal the temple from the outside world. Take rations, you will keep your ground until the arrays are modified." Seraph paused, "Ah… SHIKI-kun, I have a way to make you feel better. I had thought about turning her into a Berserker and having her run wild in the city, maybe giving her to a fanatic… one of the Caster Servants ruined that plan, but I'm feeling generous."


The fog unraveled a bit more, revealing the body of a blonde woman. She was all in white, with red eyes glaring at them, and restrained by black chains.


"Here is your new maid to make up for the others' loss." Seraph chuckled, "My gift to you: Arcueid Brunestud! And if she bothers you, you always take a stab at her. Vampires enjoy that, or so I have heard…"

Break

The king of Uruk couldn't suppress a smile, as the vessel's screens lightened. "Finally!" He had waited so long for this. "Vimana, rise up at your king's command! I order you to show Babylon's majesty to all this city's mongrels!"


The flying ship vibrated and obeyed. The engine roared and the screens showed the ship rising in the airs, pushing back the fog. Kotomine smiled at the display, "Do you think you could leave the city?"


Gilgamesh chuckled, "Kirei, the Grail has demonstrated that it can disable my ship at any time. I will not challenge it and put a smile on this… fake Saber's face," he raised his arm, "Now, it is time to reduce Fuyuki City to ashes. The problem is… which weapon I am going to use." He crossed his fingers. "I cannot sully Ea with the blood of weaklings…" he smiled, "Oh! This looks interesting… nothing quite like atomic fission to wake up the people."


"… this ship has nuclear arms?"


"Kirei, modern nukes are petards compared to what I am about to unleash."


The priest frowned. "King of Heroes, do you remember Ruler's warning? Excessive destruction will result in her making this ship blow up. Using that weapon would give her a convenient excuse to wipe us out, would it not?"


Gilgamesh gritted his teeth, "I am not afraid of her," he snarled. He was excessively angry. Why had she been chosen as Ruler? He was the only one fit to oversee heroes! It was his title alone. "I could kill her anytime I wish with my bare hands just as I could kill everybody in that damn city!"


Kirei stopped, and then smiled. "Then why not do it? Why not kill everyone yourself? It would certainly remind them of who is the king of heroes."


Gilgamesh thought about it an instant. "It is true… people have forgotten what it is to fear me. But would I dirty my weapons with the blood of these mongrels?" the king considered the question and smiled, "They would feel honored to have served me as target practice. At least they will be good at something."


"King of Heroes, we both know Saber will try to interfere," Kotomine pointed out, "She would fail, in spite of her best efforts. What better than to see her ideals be trampled upon, to realize all her righteousness does not matter in the face of overwhelming power? You could show her the strength of true regality."


The priest certainly knew how to sell his plots… and he was right. Seeing Saber giving up into despair would make his day. She might even surrender to him to save others. Gilgamesh briefly abandoned himself to a fantasy of Saber finally becoming the biggest treasure of his vast collection…


He returned to his senses the second he realized something was amiss, "Kirei… do you feel alright?" he asked, making the priest blink. "I've known you for ten years… since when are your plans this direct?"


The Master's expression turned stoic, "I now am aware that the Grail can grant any wish," he spoke, "And all I have… is a single question to ask. Surely an omnipotent device can answer a single question."


Gilgamesh laughed, "Whatever, Kirei! I need time… to prepare a grandiose spectacle worthy of my participation. It will be one that I'm sure you will probably appreciate."

Break

This night, Shirou dreamt of arrows.


Arrows piercing her flesh – blades cutting into her body – dreams of herself feeling death coming to claim her… She was alone on a plain, dying, while her killers were celebrating.


"Why?" she asked, her pelt covered with blood, "I just wanted… to befriend you…" She still wished to. She wanted to have a family, a husband that would cuddle her, children to call her mother, friends with who she could enjoy life… "Why?"


She still wanted that wish… she so wanted it…


"Buddy, pal, this dream sucks. I mean, become a giant female fox? This guy's got issues!"


Shirou's eyes widened, and he suddenly realized that, no, he wasn't a fox, "What the hell? Who's talking?!"


"Yes, what the hell is going on in your hea- Wait… you can hear me?" The voice was male, and astonished. It was coming from everywhere and nowhere at the same time, "My… well this is the first time that's happened in seventy years! Awesome!"


"Who the hell are you?" Shirou asked. "And where are we?" Was this Tamamo's dream?


"The where… well, it's probably the dream of one of your Servants, the vixen. Due to the connection, you can exchange visions of your past, and I get to watch with popcorn. And who am I? I am the most hardcore evil badass this world has to offer…" The voice took its breath, "Angry Manjew!"


Shirou found no answer to that.


"Yes, it's silly, but you need to understand… as the world's top douchebag, I need to make them as insulting as possible... seventy years in captivity and you can't help but invent a few horrible bad jokes. Or go insane. Or both. I've got no one to tell jokes to, and then, suddenly, you're here! By the way, why haven't you banged one of your Servants yet? I mean, it's the fox mating season and she has the hots for you! And you're technically that Saber's scabbard, so go impale her! Who knows, you might even get a threesome! And now you've got a elf as well! Admit it, this Medea is hot."


"… she's, what, twenty years older than I am."


"She's an elf. Look at her ears! She must be, what, centuries old? I doesn't matter anymore at that point."


"... no. Just no. And why the hell are so perverted?"


"Sorry, sorry. It's just I'm incredibly bored and need entertainment, and you're the only thing I've gotten to talk to for the last decade." The voice stopped, "Know what, next time you come, I'll give you a nice dream movie, 'cause right now you're about to wake up. See ya 'round pal!"


Shirou's eyes snapped open.


The boy stared around himself, finding himself in a bedroom. Caster was sleeping in the other bed, and light was shedding from the window. Day had started.


"I think I need a therapist."

Servant of the Day

Spirit: Gawain, the Knight of the Sun
Class: Saber
Master: Leo Harway
Alignment: Lawful Good
N. Phantasm: A++
Strength: B++
Agility: B
Mana: A
Luck: A
Endurance: B+


Class skills:
Magic Resistance B: It is very difficult for Modern Magecraft to target Gawain. He can, however, be harmed by truly powerful spells.
Riding B: Most modern vehicles can be used with above average skill.


Personal skills:
Numeral of the Saint, EX: As knight of the sun, Gawain's power increases under daylight. At noon, the effect reaches its peak and confers near invulnerability to the Saber Servant. However, the effect is negated when facing Sun-aligned Servant.
Guardian Knight, A: Gawain gains bonuses when fighting to defend his vowed lord and Master.
Eye of the Mind (True) B: Refined through experience, Gawain's sixth sense allows him to notice opportunities in battle and greatly increases the chances of a comeback.


Noble Phantasms:
Excalibur Galantine, Anti-Fortress, A+: The shining sister sword of Excalibur, offered to Gawain by the Lady of the Lake. While it lacks Excalibur's pure power, Galantine makes up by offering more versatility, allowing Gawain to summon flames in a localized area. Galantine's power varies depending on the time of use, reaching its peak during noon.

Author Dojo

"Hello! Welcome to the Author Dojo!" Tiger Taiga smiled, "Here are the author's thoughts discussed with-"


She was interrupted by a hacking noise in the background. Someone called out from behind a door, "Is that my cue?"


He was ignored.


"Hey, what's wrong with the rabbit?" Taiga wondered aloud before its chest cavity exploded outward and something hissed left and right before slithering away.


…


"Today our invitee is Gawain!" Taiga shouted, not missing a beat.


"Umm… there's blood all over the floor." Gawain noted as he stepped into the dojo.


"Don't worry about it; I'll have somebody clean it up in a little while," Taiga waved it off, "So, is there anything you'd like to share with the audience?"


"Well, I'd like to note that I'm pleased my stats were increased for this story. It only makes sense. And the fact that I'm playing such an important role is refreshing."


"Ah, but Gawain, weren't you important in EXTRA, too?"


He sat in a corner as depression hovered over him, "Defeated… Devastated… Can't serve the right king… A failure…"


"Wow, what a downer," Taiga murmured, "Anyway, it looks like bad things are ahead for everyone! Ciel's captured! And Arcueid is captured! And… Wow, it must suck to be Shirou right now. The only ones who aren't getting a raw deal are Gilgamesh and Kirei."


"Angry Manjew too," Gawain spoke. "I mean, seventy years in a cup? It explains why he has gone madder than usual."


"Anyway, next time…" she looked down at the paper, "What? That's… No… He wouldn't!" she looked closer, "With a melon?!" Tiger Taiga smiled. "Next time, the main characters get a shitload of character development, non-sexual humor make you laugh, Aoko and Shirou realize maybe three Servants are a bit too much to handle in term of prana, Arc gets a maid outfit, Rin and Archer have a bonding moment, Ilya goes see a movie, Shirou and Shiki become BFF, Spartacus' Master plays superhero, and the melon lord rules! Please review, and get your author dojo membership card!"

[Lycodrake]

This is getting extremely good...
But a whole lot just happened, and it's a challenge to sum it up here.
Nice work.

[YeOfLittleFaith]

So much happening, so many developments!
Too much to comment on, but all great nonetheless!

[Tracer]

Woah. It's getting even more interesting.

Is Hassan is Heroic Spirit TF2? God damn, Now the spy?

[Agailius]

Ohh.... OHHHH.... OOOOOOHHHHHHHHH!!!

*overdosed from this chapter's concentration of awesomesause*

[VelspertheCat]

Feels like you let your dialogue get too casual sometimes. The Emiya and Rin interaction felt that way to me, at least. Angra Mainyu veered that way for a bit, but then I realized he's sort of that way anyway.

[Tracer]

Jew fic is jew.
David and the angry manjew.

[VoidHerald]

Woah. It's getting even more interesting.

Is Hassan is Heroic Spirit TF2? God damn, Now the spy?

Jew fic is jew.
David and the angry manjew.

Next time, meet the pyro XD

Oh, Angry isn't a jew... just an incredible jerk. I thought about Angry Mojo instead, but a fan gave me that nickname, and after a search... yep. Angry is evil Jesus.

Feels like you let your dialogue get too casual sometimes. The Emiya and Rin interaction felt that way to me, at least. Angra Mainyu veered that way for a bit, but then I realized he's sort of that way anyway.

Will work on that, as for Angry, he is a bit unbalanced after seventy years in a cup... expect some mood swings.

[mAc Chaos]

I love seeing Leo and Gaiwan scenes.

Yeah the dialogue was a bit too casual in some parts. Having a character talk about trolling is like having someone drop an "lol" into a convo.

[VoidHerald]

I love seeing Leo and Gaiwan scenes.

Yeah the dialogue was a bit too casual in some parts. Having a character talk about trolling is like having someone drop an "lol" into a convo.

Mm... true. I will edit the part a bit.

[mangafreak7793]

Ooooh boy, why did David and Angrya What's his face became my new favorites to watch out for.

As Shakespere might say, go out and search new lands(Women) and explore and plunder their plots(bodies)

Swordswomen, Furry and a Elf....What do you need we need to ask to this crazed harem?

Dammit...my head is not working straight.

[Ars Poetica]

See, Void Herald? I told you making Hassan into the Red Team's amalgamation was a good idea. I told you~!

[VoidHerald]

See, Void Herald? I told you making Hassan into the Red Team's amalgamation was a good idea. I told you~!

Technically, Hassan's latest shout out comes from the BLU spy...

Ooooh boy, why did David and Angrya What's his face became my new favorites to watch out for.

Maybe because they're both trolls in their own way?