It was around 2 months, don't exaggerate. I did take them into account and so I am taking into account potential lapses like those.Originally Posted by Enhance
It was around 2 months, don't exaggerate. I did take them into account and so I am taking into account potential lapses like those.
Oh well. I don't want to make any promises as before they usually didn't work out as well, but I do have more time now than before (bb job).
Last edited by Enhance; January 30th, 2013 at 07:13 PM.
4\Self(L)
*
-- Ah? About prosthesis, we were talking this morning?
On Shikura's outskirts, in one of the forests, there is a water reservoir that is not marked on a map. Deeper under it there is an underground room that no one knows about.
-- Well that's, you know... Mato-san, you are surprisingly... well...
Romantic - hell, I can't say that. Be it through the telephone, this is still Evil Tomato, and she'll tear my eardrums even from a thousand kilometers distance. Absolutely.
-- I also find it funny, but I'm not joking. Got it? I'll tell you the address now, deal with it today.
I check the address with a map. I am now in telephone booth next to building number 13. To come to that place, I need to come back to Shikura hill, and then walk the fields on its outskirts.
-- Hm? There's quite a house here, Mato-san... How do you even read these kanji? Ehh, Ka... ryou?
-- I don't know how old is your map, but that mansion was demolished ages ago. It's still private property, but they know about your arrival, so don't worry.
-- Got it. If I go there now, I'll be there by evening, how is the owners' mood?
-- That is always in good mood, especially after sunset. And then, Shouzai. When you're done, don't forget to call me.
-- Aha... Okay, and if the communication fails, should I call too? I thought you didn't like pointless calls.
-- This time is special. Doesn't matter what hour. It's a matter of life and death, so to say. If I wouldn't know if you're alive or dead, sake would taste bad.
"See ya", the phone call awkwardly ends.
Apparently, Mato-san's fairy tale was authentic.
Clouds cleared, high starry sky, yellow warm summer moon.
Huge, cubical reservoir, on it - a heavy steel door. Door is unlocked. Stairs and a narrow passageway lead underground. No lights at all. I blindly walk down, through the passageway, I come to a door and open it. Inside it was a narrow and pressuring, torn away from reality room, like in a castle. Ceiling is an aquarium, moon swaying inside it.
-- Good evening, excuse me...
I enter the obviously unpleasant underground room... If I were mentally healthy, I would've ran away right away, but unfortunately my carefulness circuits are disabled.
In the middle of a room, there is a curtained bed. Next to it, for some reason, lay a fruit knife.
-- Yes-yes, it's great that you were able to come here at this late hour. Are you Ishizue Arika-san?
Transparent eyes look at me from the bed. Their owner, lit by moon, was undoubtedly a woman, incredibly gorgeous.
-- Ah. Yes, the real one has white hair, - happily exclaimed the black-haired beauty. It's a kid, so a girl.
A huge beast, looking like a dog - where was it hiding? - noisily sniffing my legs, greeted a new guest.
-- Good evening. Are you Karyou-san? Thing is, I heard you have excellent arm prostheses.
-- Yes, I do. Not so many, but I have some rare ones. They all choose the person though... You're in luck, Ishizue-san, looks like they'll fit you fine.
"Bark bark!" - cheerfully barked the black dog. Looks like it's good-natured, I thought and froze in place.
-- Hey, what are you...
The owner of a room, laying on bed, wasn't a usual being. It wasn't about not having limbs. Every cell inside me turned upside down from a horrible chill. Even in clinic I didn't feel such a... threat, coming from the little child before me.
-- Are you even human?..
It wonderingly opened its eyes. The incredibly beautiful face made a smile:
-- Finally, the image fits. Glad to make your acquaintance, Ishizue Arika. My name is Karyou Kaie. Hmm, yeah. You can't play a personality with just face alone.
-- What?
The unknown creature said a weird greeting.
That's the story about a weirdo I met right after discharge.
Next is the story about forming a bond with the Underground Devil, a bond that you literally can't cut even with a knife.
Next subchapter: \Hide and Self
Last edited by Enhance; January 31st, 2013 at 09:18 AM.
Mind me not, just getting Terraa's hopes up.
Well, I'm tired. I'll continue later tonight or tomorrow morning.
Last edited by Enhance; January 30th, 2013 at 07:19 PM.
My PC returns, and 2 parts got translated. What a happy day
\Hide and Self.
*
-- And that's what happened, and in the end you came here, Arika. That's the story about the mimicking possessed Hisaori Makina.
-- You're telling it like a fairy tale.
August. Almost a month has passed since this Hisaori Makina's case was over. The sun set, Karyou Kaie's basement got colder, the complicated and boring story finally ended.
-- And I don't even know Hisaori at all, only by the records. If you ask me what she was like, I wouldn't be able to give you an evening of recollections, as you like it.
When Kaie is very hungry, he begs for clinic stories as a consolation. I guess he started talking about Hisaori intentionally, wishing to ask about her life in confinement.
-- What? I don't need it. I just wanted you to think, because Hisaori Makina's story is important to you. I don't find it interesting at all.
-- I thought you like all possessed.
-- Depends on a scale. You, for example, wouldn't like a steak that is less than two hundred gramm weight, right? Her neoformation too was so little that it didn't matter.
I didn't see a steak from since I was discharged. It's been a month from when I took on a job of looking after Kaie. When will he give me my first salary, bastard?
-- And, how am I related to Hisaori story?
-- Hisaori Makina was imitating you, and she's one of the few discharged. And then again you, Arika, are not yet used to life here. I thought you could use a story of someone who has been discharged half a year before you.
-- Could use it?.. Hmm. And what about her guilt? Is she still considered Shinya's killer?
-- Mm? No, they found out that Hisaori Shinya committed a suicide. Her last accusation about A-syndrome carrier's abilities was flushed through information bureau. It appears she ran away from her inspector and now is considered missing in action. Really, where did she go, I wonder?
-- Good for her... If I did that, I would probably come afloat in a reservoir like that next day.
-- If you go running away from Mato-san, run to the opposite direction from here, alright? Don't spoil my water.
So it is. Where did she go is unknown, but Hisaori got lucky. If you're not in Mato-san's paws, you would at least be able to live.
-- Hmm. Are you envious of Hisaori Makina?
Kaie mysteriously smiles, and looks at me. Ugh. I'm used to it, but I still get nervous. Don't scare me! /That/, even though it's so attractive that I'm at loss of words, is still a guy, god damn.
-- No. I just thought about how she strained everyone. And anyway, what's with that imitation stuff. You need to see other people's lives, and that's it. No need to think about it all the time.
Hisaori Makina doesn't pass for a possessed.
People have enough problems on their own. People remember only the superficial details about others, and can't even think about what's going on inside. And they don't need to.
She, on the other hand, caught everything about others in precision. Hisaori Shinya, with his persistence, made his own "imagining and replay of someone else's life", while she was doing it subconsciously, monster. Hypertrophied imagination, so to say. That's why she was obsessed with all those sticky ideas like "nothing works out well". Everything for her worked out fine, balancing to a zero. Big successes had big failures to contrast, a healthy life, actually.
Even though she doesn't realize it, she was probably a perfect girl for everyone in her childhood. Her main mistake wasn't the possession and not even the intellect she was born with. There is "being liked by everyone", and there is "doing everything so that as many people as possible wouldn't love you". These two are completely opposite ways of life, and she thought they are the same...
-- Good for you. Hum, hum. From that quality of yours I feel uneasy.
-- And I'm uneasy from your formulations like those.
I don't want to get into Nishijima-chan's league. And I don't want to see that face, having fun using others, okay? Look at him, all amused.
-- If you're so good, Arika, then I have a question for you. If you ever imitate anyone, why would it be?
Is he mocking me? He didn't ask "who", he asked "why".
-- Who knows. I didn't ever try it... Well, probably out of admiration or trying to be the same?
Becoming an original - it's, you know... Hisaori Makina was always surrounded by fake smiles, that's why she tried to become the original one.
-- Nah. If you wanted to become original one, the talk would be easier. I'm just talking about when it's enough to become like someone. No need to especially imitate.
So it's not about the admiration? That means...
-- Ahh... Too lazy to think for yourself, so you act like someone else?
So he's talking about when you don't want to think for yourself. When you're mechanically copying someone.
-- Yes. That was the true essence of Hisaori Makina. She was thoroughly thinking about someone else's life, and in result she stopped thinking.
-- Probably, - he continued, - her thinking worked the opposite way. We with you move though our lives, changing all sorts of priorities in our mind. Compare it with a car. And she begins with a spring start. That which will require years for us, she thinks about at first, and then starts to move. For example, imitating Hisaori Shinya. Every morning she starts a thinking spring named "Hisaori Shinya" for just some minutes, and then she continues playing another person. If you talk about an energy that is used for that, even among possessed she's one of the best. If she used it correctly, she could do anything she wanted.
-- I don't get it. What's the point of doing that?
-- Like I said - she's only thinking to be able to stop thinking. Like a real wind-up mechanism. I don't know what other problems are coming up with that, but if Hiasori Makina didn't imitate anyone, she couldn't have any dreams or hopes.
Kaie's words have a false bottom.
Dreams and hopes of Hisaori - that's somehow plain, not about it. Hisaori Makina had to erase herself to be able to live at all - like that.
-- ...
What a troublesome life. She was living for suffering, so to say.
-- Ah, where are you going? The important talk has just begun. If you want to know why I started to talk about Hisaori Makina...
-- No need. Leave it until the better times. Tsuranui and Eda are waiting for me.
I part with the only treasure of this basement, the sofa that is so comfy to sleep at. The talk was dark, but yeah, I had what to think about. It's been a month since I got discharged. Looks like Hisaori Makina reminded me, from the inside, about a vector in this life I've been accepting in all its haziness.
\
-- Hello, is this Ishizue Arika-san?
-- Yes, Ishizue here, who is that?
-- It's me... Long time no see. How are you?
-- Not bad. How about you?
-- Thanks for asking. My right hand hurts a bit, but I'm fine. Well, thanks to it, I'm now a level higher. Cool, right? If I have a chance, I'll play you even better, Ishizue-san.
-- What? Possessed get level ups? With what? Bread or blood?
-- Enlightenment and talent - so I think. You need both, otherwise you can't. And you have neither, Ishizue-san. Well, you're not possessed anyway.
-- Well, that's good. But what was that? You're not interested in me.
-- Obviously. I don't care about you at all. I don't need to imitate you. I just can't live otherwise.
-- Where did I hear that... Are you heavily ill? Or maybe you're even dying. Then again, these behavioral patterns are a necessary state for you guys.
-- Well, so to say - yes, I'm dying. And you, Ishizue-san, didn't go too far from me. Are you always that heartless?
-- Why would I want to get familiar? "I just can't live otherwise", it isn't funny. All your system is upside down. Life is a life because you're already living. Every goal is ahead.
-- So it's not like that for you?
-- No. Thanks to you, I understood it clearly. I want to live as easily as I can. Requiring a reason to show my will? No thanks.
-- Heh. You're weird, Ishizue-san. You were pessimist before. Well, doesn't matter. I have other things to do now. You have the evening papers, right? Don't throw them away, check them out. Couldn't last for half a year, but there are some useful things there.
-- Report?.. Hey, what's this here about picking food and counting calories, and about manga to buy? How is that useful?
-- Maybe a try on clinging? Ah, but it didn't help at all, there probably will be no results. Damn it. Why am I even doing it?
-- That's what I asked. Why are you calling me?
-- Last wish of Karyou-san, that's it. How can I not fulfill it. Oh, and you got a message from your sister. "I'll become stronger and come out, so don't get yourself killed, brother". Alright, bye-bye, Ishizue-san.
-- Yeah, bye-bye. By the way, who are you?
\
-- Boo... You forgot in the end, stupid.
I clicked my tongue and left the telephone booth.
I paid my debts. But I was sad, because the main part, from Yamada... it's an alias, I guess... I couldn't say.
Knows about Ishizue-san just as much as he himself does. Ishizue Arika in my head stepped on a landmine in the end. And if it wasn't my mistake in imitation, their friendship wouldn't last long.
-- I guess that's earlier, before his sister kills him. Hold on for a year, Ishizue-san.
Time to throw it out of my head. If I start thinking by myself, I'm done for. I silently start the spring.
Well, no time to be nitpicking. I'll start from a completely random stranger.
Next subchapter: \3.5\Self (R)
Last edited by Enhance; February 2nd, 2013 at 11:14 AM.
Goodbye, Shinya.
You didn't really get much stage time, goodbye now.
He's just behind Kazumi in terms of suffering.
If anyone is interested in HandS in FB2 format, my friend is making one so I could share it after I'm done with the last chapter.
Should edit/check everything before converting it to other format. IMO.
He's doing it on the fly and for himself, just thought someone might find it more convenient than reading from website.
\3.5\Self (R)
And I - whoosh.
From the ashy space, I hear the tenth wave coming.
*
It attacked all my body at once. As if I jumped into fire. All my skin, all my muscles and intenal organs were attacked by an acid rain. Like I was ground by a huge mixer from head to toes.
-- E-e-e-eh... A-a-a-a-ah!
Torture, close to pleasure. I couldn't even moan.
With my eyes, cut into little cubes, I watch the ashy sunlight, falling on small pieces, and sea, and three days old moon, and a phantom of a big fish swimming across the room.
-- A-a-ahh... Ah?..
Yeah, the phantom.
I wasn't melted or ground.
I lift my head up - still the same reservoir, and no sign of the fallen sea. No signs of wetness on floor or walls. But, be it funny or scary, I'm completely drenched.
-- Hey... Just now, the glass... broke?
-- Glass?
Limbless child questioningly tilts his head.
We with him have different perceptions. I thought about glass and water, and he probably has different names for it.
-- I see, "Sorrow" didn't like you. Ahh. You're in his saliva for a while now anyway.
Ashy rays darken. A huge fish appears in the reservoir over my head. Its shadow, like an eye, looks at me.
-- Ha... ha... What's that fish, looks completely like that phantom?.. I got it. Yeah. And I thought it's not like that.
Anyway, it's not a question of how fish lives in the water, transparent like air. There is no fish like that in any encyclopedia.
-- Hey. Was I wrong again?
I don't think I can kill him. At least in this dungeon, he's invincible. That's why he will be the killer. You only stretch your hand, and a counterattack will come, that's the natural theory.
-- Aha. I am disappointed, Hisaori Makina. Play me as much as you want. But who gave you this foolish idea that you can't be real if the original still exists?
I drop my knife on the ground. Still like a wet mouse that parted with life, I listen to Karyou-san's scolding.
-- And anyway, replacing the original one is not imitation. You have to imitate the successful ones, and that is your goal in itself. If you will become the original one, who are you going to imitate?
He's right. I can flawlessly imitate someone, but if he dies, then it's not an imitation, it's a recording. If I imitate someone that doesn't exist anymore, it will be only me, Hisaori Makina, inheriting the existence.
-- I guess. I shouldn't sit in the chair, I have to just look at it. Sorry, I'll keep that in mind. Can you forgive me this once?
-- Okay. You're not at fault that he didn't like you. Now our killing score is even.
-- Uhh...
I sigh in relief. Whatever it was, I need to run away from here. My legs are still shaking. I still am not allowed to look at this chair.
-- Well, farewell. Your job is over.
Oh yeah, I need to return this hand that is glued hard to me.
-- Hmm, Kaie, about this prosthesis...
-- Ah, this one. You can have "Delight" for a while. You're going to have it hard, and you never can have enough useful hands, right?
-- Are you sure? I won't come back to return it.
-- It's okay. I'll substitute it with Hate for now, so I'll make it somehow. And even if you won't come back, it will come back by itself when you die.
My legs started shaking even more. Creepy. I love him, after all!
-- Better tell me, do you have any plans already? If you need money, I can give you a bonus for all that time.
-- Nah. No problems with money. I still have Shinya's inheritance. And then.. well, I'll be on the run, but it's hard to get out of this prefecture. Even impossible. I guess I'll hide in the town until everything calms down.
I walk to the exit. If I decided to run, I should start right away. I can't imagine police barging into here, but an acquaintance of Karyou-san, the inspector, can come.
-- Ah, wait. One more thing. When everything settles down, can you call Ishizue Arika?
-- Why?
That's somehow surprising. Now I need to call Ishizue-san - since when did he start to ask me for impossible things?
-- You worked here for half a year. Giving your successor the work is your duty and responsibility.
Karyou-san smiles. Just like during our first meeting, the naive first-class smile.
I exit the dungeon. The job talk is over.
-- Sigh...
I didn't tell him anything after all.
I want him to know, but it's not in my power now. I walk the deserted forest, and suddenlly remember the six months old dialogue. About how - bang - the gym was shaking. About the promising newbie in D building, younger sister of Ishizue-san, and about what happened then.
-- Hey. What do you think about possessed? That we are all sick and need to be isolated? We can't live normally, that means we're very weak.
The black-haired beauty, which was, to say, younger than me, looked at me amazedly, like her brother did before.
-- I never once thought that way. But if you speak about power, we are strong for sure. And we're all tough nuts.
Bang. Like in a nightmare, the sandbag flies up to ceiling. Eight meter long chain and a sixty kilogram weight screech and bend.
-- What's so tough? Well, if you look at you, you are tough, but...
-- Not physically, but mentally. Both you and me are tough. We're fine with death of our relatives or isolation, we're too thick-skinned. So thick-skinned that we don't care about a lot of things.
Bang. The hitting fist slightly gave off murderous intent.
Possession, they say, is a brain tumor, that appears because of mental weakness. And you're saying it appears over it.
-- But... it's hard. We can't take our indifference as much as we have it. We have no problems. We're a bother to everyone while aren't bothered by anything. But we still want, without any reason, to change ourselves.
"While we could just not care", - she laughs and happily kicks the bag. Suffering and happiness. She obviously loved herself like that.
-- By the way, why are you doing this?
-- Hmm, this? Well, it's not to chill...
Touma Mato caught her and dragged her to this clinic.
Now she has an awful wound. Not a physical one, a mental wound. As an animal she obviously ran away, but she was ground into mincemeat. Letting her guard down and relaxing from being special, she lost to a usual human.
-- Well, what can you do. We only exhaust our mind, we didn't train our special abilities or body. And so I thought I should fix that. To tell the truth, I can leave here even now. But I need to change a bit more, or else I won't be able to fight that woman.
Bang, ding-g. The last, finishing middle-kick sends bag into the wall, and it doesn't come back.
-- Yeah... She's something, that girl.
There are no possessed as optimistic as her, I guess. Back then I thought my difference was a weak point and ignored everything, but now I understood it and agreed. A human being needs self-appraisal.
-- I found a perfect chair. I was very careful, but it didn't work out well.
I thought it's okay, but it's better if I train too. I was too reliant on the talent. If I want to change, then I should do it thoroughly. Only changing the interior world won't do. I'll get a new spring. To mimic the outside as well, to be no one and anyone, to become a winded mechanism.
Feh. Now you'll see, you little bastard.
\Hide and Self. end
***
From the name and by request of Underground Devil I spend a couple of hours watching the stop. After Makina left, I unhurriedly walk to a residential area and enter room 303, where is nothing now.
Strangely, the room that was once a kitchen is now crimson-colored. On the narrow balcony, visible from the window, hugging her knees and calling for help was a phantom of small Makina, who was a goddess back then.
-- Ahh...
Crimson, which was probably looking sad three years ago, now got the shine of a glass of holiday wine. Ah, so shining. It hurts so much. What's with the "human is burning"! The little sister is the one burning...
-- But sorry, Makina. Just with you coming here, I won.
I sit in the kitchen and put the stolen knife to my throat. Last moments. Three years old events flash before my eyes.
"Learn from your sister".
"Shinya, you're copying your sister too much".
No. No, no, no. She's the copy, those manners are mine. I'm Shinya, she's the false one, people, listen, I'm the real one!!
-- Oh...
I hear the echo of my own scream. It is also over. Maybe with my way of thinking nothing will work out well for me, but that method will set things straight. Because Makina was the one who taught me that. If you want to remove someone from this world, just sacrifice yourself. Finally, I defeated the demon. My palm pressed into the handle. Pain and ceasing to exist do not frighten me. Those are not result, those are means. Moreover, the relief comes earlier.
The room is still crimson, no matter where you look.
In the end, I return myself to me.
That's it... Bye-bye, Shinya.
Next chapter: 1\formal hunt
Last edited by Enhance; February 27th, 2013 at 12:09 PM.
Aaaand that marks the end of HandS. Huzzah! Thanks for the support!
Next in the line goes formal hunt.
Now, I would like to ask about two points in the last segment. First is, the past form of the word "Grind" (which would be "grinded" if it wasn't some super special word), is it "ground"? (Vegetables were ground by the mixer?)
And the second,
That part was ambiguous in Russian, it could mean "She likes that device of hers" or "She likes how she's constructed" (as in, she likes how she is).Suffering and happiness. She obviously likes her device.[*]I am pretty sure it's the first one, but better safe than sorry.
Last edited by Enhance; February 2nd, 2013 at 09:50 PM.
I don't even know where you got the device part.
Oh nevermind, I see it now, yeah the second should work, as Paitouch says. It just conveys that Makina is into/fond of those kind of emotions/things..Now you understand the Sadism and Masochism part even more!
Last edited by Crown; February 2nd, 2013 at 02:12 PM.
Yes, it's ground. And it's more like the second one.
彼女はそんな自分を心底愛しているようだ。
Well, to tell it close enough, it's like "she likes her construction", which could either mean that she likes how she's made or that she likes some construction of hers (that bag on a chain?) which is what I thought.
It's a sandbag, man.
It's not something you'd normally call a device though lol. I mean, you can, I guess, but it'd sound weird; maybe it works better in Russian.よせばいいのにねー、なんて笑いながら、楽しそうにサンドバッグを跳ね上げる
EDIT: Man, actually looking at your post now, you wrote sandbag! So why do you seem confused as to what it is?
Last edited by Paitouch; February 2nd, 2013 at 08:32 PM.
Now that I checked, the "device" he was speaking of it's not even part of the same sentence as the Suffering and happiness one, he mixed them, step up Enhance!
Last edited by Crown; February 2nd, 2013 at 06:11 PM.
You got me confused!
I am confused!
Here's the part in question -
She happily kicks the sandbag, which I thought later is referred to as "device that she likes". `Suffering and happiness` was written as a separate sentence."While we could just not care", - she laughs and happily kicks the bag. Suffering and happiness. She obviously loved herself like that.
It wasn't because I was thinking about her sandbag, it's just that the word "device" in Russian can mean either "device" or "structure".
So her `device` may be a device that belongs to her (the sandbag, which I called 'bag on a chain' to emphasize it being a device of some sort) or her structure, and in that sentence it was impossible to determine which one is right.
Anyway, thanks for the clarifying, thispretty much explains it.彼女はそんな自分を心底愛しているようだ。
EDIT:
Oh yeah, now that I used the word "structure", it seems to be so similar to that Russian word that was there. Like, imagine a Lego robot (or a molecule, if you have enough imagination) that built a house and then said "I like my structure!". That's the sort of ambiguity I faced.
Last edited by Enhance; February 2nd, 2013 at 09:49 PM.
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