Wandering Hearts [Moemon Fanfic]

[Erlkonig]

Twelve, you bastard! I read this while unsurprisingly thinking "man it's gonna be a lewdfest" but it actually has a story that is fleshed out! Anyways, looking good so far. One question, by the way. Considering your setting's implications, do Breeders even exist in this verse?

EDIT: Wait nevermind. CTRL+F answered my question

Still makes me wonder about their facilities though. Do they have artificial moemon insemination or do they just lump males and females together and see what happens?

[Twelveseal]

Mostly the latter, except in cases where specific Breed traits are desired. Part of it will actually be explained in a chapter that hasn't been written yet. There's a point already written where Aurum is informed about some of the... oddities of Moemon breeding, and can't believe it. So he's going to be asking the Prof. about it. Who better qualified to inform him than the perv, eh?

But anyway, Breeder facilities are mostly designed to include a mix of simulated natural environments alongside human habitations. Basically, the Facility Staff lives on-site and spend most of their time living alongside the Moemon, teaching them about human society and the requirements to interact with it. At the same time, they maintain a close watch on the Moemon themselves and encourage them to have as many offspring as possible. Since that's a natural imperative for them anyway, Moemon Breeders act more like caretakers and educators than actual breeders as we think of them. Sometimes though, there will be a situation where certain traits are specifically desired, in which case they operate in a more conventional sense; they attempt to find suitable mating pairs, or barring that, rely on artificial insemination. Most Moemon aren't fond of that, though. Generally though, the costs required to have a custom bred Moemon, alongside the time it takes for one to grow to maturity and be fully trained means that only wealthy people can really afford to order such a process. The more specific the attributes requested in the offspring, the more expensive it will be due to difficulties finding and breeding suitable parents.

[Twelveseal]

[Trust me, I’m the Professor]

The sound of the room’s phone wakes me up. It’s a loud, annoying ringing that has no place in a room for rest and recovery.
Shut the hell up, I’m trying to sleep.
The phone, it doesn’t listen to my telepathic command.
It keeps ringing. I am filled with a bad premonition.
I reach out awkwardly and lift the receiver from the archaic thing. As I bring it to my ear, I hear a wet slapping sound and gasps of pleasure.
“Professor Sequoia?”
“Ah, how did you know? Are you actually an Esper?” Are you seriously asking me that?
“Don’t tell me you’re not aware of it.”
“Eh? So you are!? There’s nothing like that in my records!” Holy shit, he’s not even aware of it.
“No, I’m not an Esper. If I was such a ridiculous thing as that, I wouldn’t be in the hospital right now.”
“Ah, that’s true!”

“Anyway, what did you call me about?” I want to hurry up and get back to sleep, but I have a bad feeling.
“Ah, that’s right. I just wanted to inform you that we’ve had a confirmation on six Starters! They should arrive by the end of the week.” Ehhhhhhhhhhh!?!?
“Isn’t that absurdly fast?”
“Well, normally yes. It seems that these were a few troublemakers that didn’t fully pass their obedience training initially. Rather than delay the start date, they just pushed them back a bit further.”
“Isn’t it kind of silly to just ship six though?”
“Normally yes, but they’re locally raised. Unfortunately, that’s also why I don’t actually know exactly when they’ll be arriving.” In other words, they’re on call, so to speak.
Shit.
“Ahhh… That doesn’t do me any good. I can’t do anything like this. Unless you can come down here with some miracle drug that can heal me, I’m stuck here.”
“Ah ha! I have just the thing!” Wut? There’s no way something that convenient exists. Even if this was a fanfiction written by some insane two-bit hack pervert, there’s no way such a thing would exist.
“I’ll bring it right over!” Eh, wait. Is this guy serious?
What the hell am I supposed to think about this?
Whatever the case, the other end hangs up.
I will not get my hopes up. I refuse.
I will not place my hopes in the hands of that pervert.

After a wait that seems like an eternity, one that seriously makes me think visiting hours should be over already, a pervert in a lab coat walks in.
“Ah, I could never sleep like that.” The first words out of his mouth make fun of the position I have to lay in.
I will not ask about this wonder drug, I will not ask. Nope. Won’t ask. Not one bit.
Oh god I wanna ask.

He sets something down on the table next to me. It’s an ominous black case that looks slightly larger than my late phone.
Is that some kind of container for a wonder drug?
“The hell is that?”
“Your Moedex.”
“My what?”
“Your Moedex. Since I heard you had a problem with your phone, I decided I might as well bring it over. It has a cell phone function, among a lot of other things.”
“Eh, wait a minute. Just what the hell is a Moedex anyway?”
“Hmm? Ah! It’s something the Moemon Research Community instituted about a decade ago. Basically, it’s a tool for gathering information on the individual types and capabilities of Moemon Breeds. Since so many peoplet aking the Quest do unusual things or go to unusual places in search of undiscovered Breeds of Moemon or to improve the abilities of their existing partners, we decided to capitalize on it. This thing connects to the internet and has access to an information database recording information about the known Breeds, their habits and habitats, their capabilities, and other information. It has a camera function so that you can take snapshots on your journey, or just make memories, and you can upload them to the archive right from the Moedex. It also has a little place to store your badges, if you want, functions as a phone, and is a mobile Wifi Hotspot with nearly global service! There're no contracts, monthly fees, or service charges, and it’s totally free. Admittedly, we don’t upgrade you when a new model comes out, but it beats basically any other phone service in existence.” Holy shit. Gimme.

“Ah, how about durability, though?” I remember getting cooked and the sad fate of my last phone.
“It’s not like it’s indestructible, you know. But the construction was based off of the structure and composition of Blastoise shells, so it can stand up to a lot of punishment. It’s highly resistant to impact and pressure, is water-proof, heat resistant and flame retardant, and has powerful surge protectors and a non-conductive casing. Ah, you’ll have to keep it charged, though. The battery life is one thing that’s still a problem…It’s only good for about a week, less if you use it often. Most people need to recharge it every three days, from what I’ve heard. Phone calls aren’t bad, but internet use and texting is pretty harsh. Especially pic messages.”
“This thing have GPS too?”
“Errr… No. Not directly, anyway. We haven’t gotten clearance to use an existing satellite array, and, well… It takes a lot of money to put something like that into space. But you can probably find a similar service online!” Huh. If I were making something like that for travelers, that would beone of the first things I’d add on. Maybe they’re getting resistance from the phone companies? If this thing really does what they say it does…
“Hey, why is something like this free?”
“Ah, well, it’s not really free exactly. We use these things for data collection, like I said before. The information we gather from these things goes into our research studies and documentation. Basically, the Moemon Research Community uses the Moedex as a method of converting Quest Applicants into volunteer researchers and test subjects. It really cuts down on our costs. Especially since we can track whether or not a unit’s been tampered with, that way we can disregard information from it as unreliable.”
“So… In other words, people that use these things are basically doing your job for you.”
“Not quite that extreme, but yeah, they’re doing a lot of the leg-work. Still, if we want to research something specific, or in greater detail, we have to do it ourselves. It’s not like this has made my job obsolete, you know. It just makes it easier. In return for that help, the Community provides our volunteers with valuable services and resources, so it’sreally a win-win situation for us.”

“Where the hell do you guys get the money for this kind of stuff?”
“Eh? Government grants, military and corporate contracts, charities, and even special interest groups and private investors. We work for a lot of different people, you know. Research into Moemon is valuable in virtually all walks of life. It’s just a matter of turning our findings into applicable knowledge and technology.”
Damn. Suddenly, I’m actually kind of scared of this guy. Just what kind of people is he connected with?
“Anyway, one of my favorite uses of this little toy here is the internet. Which brings me to the reason I’m here…”
A premonition. Something bad is about to happen.
“No porn.”
“Don’t worry, don’t worry. Check it out.” He opens the Moedex and fiddles with it. It looks like it has a touch screen.
Suddenly, I hear a familiar voice coming through thes peaker.
“Gatorade.” “H₂O!” “Gatoraaade.” “H₂O!!!”
“Why…”
“Haven’t you heard? Laughter is the best medicine!”
“…”
“What?”
“Are you serious?”
“Yes?”
“You came all the way here for ‘laughter is the best medicine’?”
“Well… Yeah.”
“When I get out of this bed, I’m going to kick your ass.” I think a vein just exploded. My vision’s turning red.
“Ah, look, your pulse rate is going up.”
“I KNOW!”
“Hey, hey, calm down! I’m just trying to cheer you up.”
“At least do something! You can at least say you tried!”
“What exactly do you expect me to do? It’s not like Potion Spray works on people, you know.”
“That’s fine. At least say you made a half-assed attempt instead of this.”
“Fine, fine, I thought you might say something like that, so I brought it just in case. I’ll prove it doesn’t work on people.” He takes a can out of his jacket pocket.
“This might sting a little.”
“WhateveOHMYGODTHATBURNS!!!” It feels like somebody just lit my back on fire.
“Is it really that bad?”
“Oh god yes.” It still burns, but it’s not as bad as that first impact. And it itches. It feels like somebody poured Icy Hot into my stitches. At least that feeling is fading fast.
“It itches.”
“Eh? Really? That’s not something reported in Testing…”
“What?” I feel weird. I feel like I’m going to puke. “I feel sick.”
“Uhhhh… This could be bad.”
“What do you mean?” Oh shit.
“You might be having an allergic reaction to this.”
“You’re joking.”
“Uhhh, well… No, not really. There weren’t any signs of something like that in human testing, but there’s always a chance of an anomaly. The burning sensation’s normal, but itching isn’t.”
“If I die because of this, I’m going to come back as a Gengar and haunt you for the rest of your life.”
“Hey, you asked for it. Besides, that’s not possible.”
“You absolutely sure it’s not?”
“……… No.”
“I’m going to beat the shit out of you, you quack pervert!” That’s it. Barbarian Rage has activated. Fury washes away the sick feeling in my stomach and the itching feeling in my back. Before I realize it, I’m on my knees grabbing that pervert by the collar with a fist pulled back and-
It’s like the sound of a roaring beast. A monstrous noise that echoes through the room. It’s like the sound of stones being ground to dust in the coils of a mighty Onix.

My stomach.

That sudden burst of power is crushed beneath a wave of hunger like nothing I’ve ever experienced. I feel like I haven’t eaten in days. No. No, there was one time I felt like this. But I don’t want to think about that.
I collapse back on the bed as the Professor stumbles back.
“Munchies.”
“Eh?”
“I have the munchies.”
“Uhhhhhh… Hold on.”
“Feed me, Seymour.” The sad thing is, I don’t actually think I can move. Feed me may actually be literal. I feel like my whole body’s completely drained of energy. I’m just mumbling from my position on the hospital bed.
Instead of going and getting me food like an intelligent monkey, this pervert is staring at me.
“No… No way.”
“Red Warrior needs food badly.”
“No… Just what arey ou?”
“Hungry.” Take the hint, dumbass.
“No… The Spray… It actually worked.” Wut?
“Ah, so you lied to me before. That stuff actually works on people.”
“No. It really doesn’t work on people. If it did, don’t yout hink we would have used it on you already? What… What exactly are you?”
“What? It’s like you’re saying I’m some sort of Moemon or something. That’s just ridiculous.” The only weird thing about my genome is that I happen to be part of the Joy family. They’re strange, but they’re still human, jackass.
“No. There’s no way that’s the case. You must be some sort of mutation.” Ah.
So I’m a freak then.
I guess I can live with that.
So I’m an unnaturally convenient freak. Who’s really hungry right now.
“Hey, quit looking at me like that. And stop poking my back.” The pervert is prodding the place I assume was wounded with a finger.
“I want to study you.” Oh god. No. Just no.
“Just get me something to eat. You weren’t kidding when you said that shit makes you hungry.”
“Ah… R-right. I’ll see if the cafeteria’s still open.”
……………
…......
…
Having been fed more than twice what I normally eat in a given sitting of dreary hospital food, I find myself once again filled with the desire to sleep.
I managed to send the pervert away after more refusals to let him ‘study’ me than I can count. More accurately, visiting hours ended.

It was only after the fact that I would realize that I had actually slept through the night before, and completely slept through my parents’ return visit. I felt kind of sad about that, but it meant that there was less time until I was officially released.
I could feel my mind getting hazy even as I tried to figure out how to explain to the doctor why I was sleeping on my back, why my wounds were healed.
I didn’t mind too much as I drifted off peacefully.

[Lycodrake]

lol
I'm now imagining Aurum getting a Rotom (Heat/Oven form) - so he can have food as often as possible. XD
Definitely looking forward to more. ^^

[ItsaRandomUsername]

Self-deprecation and pop culture in a single update. I can live with that.

Life goes ever onward for Aurum.

[Twelveseal]

Indeed. He'll carry on. Though this chapter does bring up some interesting questions~

[Lycodrake]

I'll laugh mercilessly if he's unknowingly a Ditto Moemon.
Talk about identity crises right there.

[Twelveseal]

That would be hilarious. He's not though.

[Lycodrake]

That would be hilarious. He's not though.

Just throwing it out there. X'D

[Erlkonig]

we JRPG now

[Twelveseal]

[Replay]

I find myself waking up to a very worried Doctor Mills. Mills, whose first name I don’t remember, has been responsible for my care. Apparently. Mostly, he’s been a bit too clinically detached, since he’s barely spoken to me.
Right now, he’s saying more to me than he did over the course of the entire past two days.

I guess it’s understandable. His job is done way too soon, and he has no idea why.
It’s not like I can tell him ‘Hey, I took a wonder drug for animals last night, and now all of my injuries are gone.’ Sequoia wouldn’t be the only loon wanting to study me then. So what they get out of me is this:
“I don’t know. Maybe I’m just a fast healer?” In hindsight, that might have gotten me stuck in some kind of study as well.
This has absolutely no effect on their actions whatsoever. The Doctor and the nurses are running around making phone calls, organizing papers, and generally not leaving me alone for five seconds.
Maybe I should have said it was an Aura healer? Or an Esper?

Next time something like this happens, I’ll tell them a wizard did it.

Before they can ship me off to some research lab, I tell them I’ve already made arrangements with a one ‘Doctor Sequoia,’ and make a call to my mom on this new Moedex thing to see if she can’t pull some strings.
Like I said before, her family has a lot of pull in the medical, pharmaceutical, and veterinary communities. Apparently, it’s enough pull to keep this quiet. I give her the details in as vague a way as possible, and before long, they’re removing my stitches and I’m on my way home in my dad’s car.
“What I don’t understand is how you managed it.” My dadwasn’t told what happened, apparently. It seems like mom just told him to pick me up.
That’s not really unusual. Mom basically rules thehousehold. The office is dad’s domain, the home is hers.
“You’re not going to believe this, but…” I give him the gist of what happens. Even from the side view I can see his eyes bulge.
“So…”
“Yeah, so apparently I’m some sort of mutant freak that can use things that normally only work on Moemon. Or at least Potion Spray.” Actually, that makes me think. They make a lot of weird products for Moemon, right? Something about Technical Machines that can give them special abilities and super vitamins that can dramatically increase their abilities permanently.
“I wonder…” Then again, that might be pushing my luck. It’sprobably just some weird reaction to the chemicals in that spray.
“Why do I have the feeling your mother has something to do with this?”
“I had the same impression, but it’s not like I can prove it. I’d like to ask her, but prying into the Joy family…”
“Discretion is the better part of valor, son. The Joys are not people you want mad at you.”
“Yeah, no kidding. Just thinking about how fast everything cleared up with a single phone call scares me.”
If they can do something like that with a case that could revolutionize the treatment of injuries for the entire human race, just make it all disappear, what would happen if they decided you were poking too much into their secrets?
I’m pretty sure mom is involved in this somehow. Just what’s been inferred, and what I can see for my own eyes every time I go to a clinic s cares me.

There’s no way that many people can be that perfectly identical, even if they’re in the same family, without some serious genetic abnormalities.
Or modifications.

It’s scary to think that I might be some kind of genetically modified experiment, or the child of something like that. If that’s the case…
Do I really qualify as human?

This spring break sucks. Really sucks.

When is something going to go right for me? Ah, well, right without some kind of insane catch, anyway.

The rest of the drive is in silence. I see lots of people my age walking along the streets. Sure, there are others, older people, younger, but it’s the ones my age that really stand out.
They have Moemon beside them.
All different shapes and sizes, male and female, in lots of different outfits. It’s like this every year. Like a festival of color and race. And still, I don’t know how to feel about it. Should I feel jealous of them? Should I feel afraid of what’s to come? Should I feel happy for them?
How many of them have had sex with their partners? How many were virgins before?

What are those people thinking, I wonder?
The city of Fall’s Ridge eventually gives way to highway, lined with deep forests and hills. I wonder how many wild Moemon live in those woods, hide in those hills. The mountains loom high and close, putting everything in shadow, and after only about ten minutes, my dad turns off. It really feels surreal sometimes, how close the city is.

Beech Wood, the town where I live, is a suburb of Fall’sRidge. It’s a mountainous area around here, filled with natural beauty. It’s a great place to live. The wildlife would agree. At least, assuming you’re not afraid of said wildlife, anyway. The mountains here are old and quiet and peaceful. The hills hide old ruined cabins and mines, limestone caverns, and ruins from ancient civilizations. There are plenty of nature trails, and during the winter the mountains and towns are blanketed with snow. It can get pretty hot during the summer and spring, though.
Despite being a mountain town, where almost everything is built on slants and following the hills and valleys, we’re surprisingly modern. I’ve seen other towns that look like nothing’s changed over the past forty years. Beech Wood, though, everything is modern convenience. Partly it’s because there’s a large University in town. There are also several active mines in the area, so there are two major sources of income and a major public draw. The town’s proximity to Fall’s Ridge helps keep it relatively small. Ah, and there’s also the dam to the west that feeds off of a large river that flows out of the mountains. That’s a major source of income too. I almost forgot about it since it’s so far out there.

Twisting mountain roads bring us back home, a shortcut that avoids most of the city traffic. It actually takes us past the Research Center that brought so much pain the other day.
Soon enough the car pulls into the drive of our simple, two story home. To this day I don’t know who put forth more money for it, my mom or my dad. I just know that they paid for it jointly and bought after years of payments.
It’s a nice house, I think. Wood, rather than those brick ranches you see so often in suburbs. Though really, that’s not uncommon around here. There are quite a few wood houses in the neighborhood.

It feels good to be home. It may not have been that long, but when you can’t get back on your own... Then it really makes you miss it.
“Ah! The power’s back.”
“Did you think we’d leave it like that?” My dad laughs as we head inside.

I sit at the table and just rest. It’s strange. Just sitting here feels good for some reason. Relaxing. Before long, mom comes back, a slightly sour look on her face.
Apparently, she’d been discussing the situation with her relatives. Her look says there might be trouble, or there might not. That conflicted face of someone worrying about something.
Both my dad and I look at each other.
We know that look. That look says someone in her family isn’t happy right now, and that it could turn into a nasty problem. That look also says we won’t find anything out about the problem until she knows we’re going to have to deal with it for certain.
There’s no point in asking. It’ll only stress her out more.
Sometimes, I really wonder about her. The only time I’ve ever seen a woman of the Joy family who wasn’t a Nurse, Vet, or Doctor, it was my mother. She completely left that behind, even if she was trained for it. I’ve never learned why. No, I’ve never been able to learn. Something stops me before I ask, like an invisible wall. She may be my mother, and she may be a slave to the color pink, but…
Miranda Joy Birch is a mystery.

She heads off to her room without looking up, her chin in her hands, deep in thought.
The best thing to do is leave her alone for now. Besides, my dad knows better than I do how to turn her mood around.
Speaking of which, I look over at my old man.
We communicate without words, knowing what the other’s thinking. When she’s like this…

“Cup Ramen.” We say it in unison.
Mom loves to cook, surprisingly, and hates it when we eat this junk. But we also know it makes her feel better to think we wouldn’t take care of ourselves if she wasn’t around.
So when she’s down, we eat junk food as a way to stoke her spirits. She’ll see the cups later, and chew us out for sure. Which is exactly the kind of fire we want to see in her.

After a hearty meal of staple college food, dad heads off to see what he can do about mom’s state, and I’m left to find something to do with myself.

It’s been a while, but I don’t feel like going back to my room just yet. Instead, I feel like feeling the fresh air, so I go back outside. There’s a screened deck at the back of the house and a folding sports chair that’s easy to take in during bad weather. I plop down in that and just look, and listen.
I can hear the air conditioner running in my parents’ room. The light’s still on in there, too. They must be talking. I look out and see the woods, deep and dark. Is that where she came from? That dark place? Or was it further, those deep blue mountains in the distance, with their white peaks?

I wonder about that strange girl that was only a part of my life for a single day. I wonder about the strange sense of attachment I have to her. I wonder if I’ll see her again, if I want to see her again. I wonder what the future holds as a cooling breeze makes the leaves dance on the distant trees. The wind carries the faint smell of rain, a promise never far off in spring.

In this moment, a sense of calm and peace washes over me. I don’t have the right to feel that. My body’s caused problems for my parents, and soon enough I’ll have to give that blood sample to the pervert. I’ve made them worry about my health, not to mention racked up a nice hospital bill.

But right now… Right now, it just feels nice. I can smell the scent of flowers on the breeze, the scent of coming rain, the scent of life itself. I can hear the birds in the trees and the song of crickets and frogs as the sky turns shades like autumn leaves. Night draws over the town, and people get ready for sleep.

I breathe deep. I drink it in. I smile. It’s a sad smile, but it’s a smile.
There’s a lot I don’t know. A lot of uncertainty. I still feel like I lost something.

But there’s still tomorrow.

I listen to the silence. I listen to the song of life. I breathe the scent of life.
I listen to the silence. As if obliging me, the air conditioner in my parent’s room grows quiet. The light flickers off, and it’s just me and the coming night. Fireflies dance in the yard.

As the sun gives up the sky to the moon, I look up and sigh. It’s a good night. My eyes adjust to the darkness and I watch the dancing lights, look at the sparks that compete with the moon and stars in the heavens.

How long I sit there, I don’t know. I just enjoy it for a time. But even then, I still need to go to sleep. Heaving another sigh, I rise out of the chair and head inside, flipping the lights.

Nothing happens.

No light.

“Eh?” The lights won’t come on. The fridge is silent. I glance at the DVD player in the living room, my eyes already adjusted to the dark. There’s no display.

Didn’t the AC and light shut off at the same time earlier?
No way.
Can’t be.

I grab a flashlight from the kitchen and one of my bats, and I’m in the yard before I can even think about it.
I already know where I’m going.

The latch is open again, the door ajar. The space under thef looring beckons.
I turn on the flashlight and go in, bat at the ready.
I’m not so stupid as to assume it’s her just because it’s a similar situation. Or for that matter, even if it is her, that she won’t try to cook me again.
I sweep the light around the space, but I don’t see anything. The nest is still there. Looks like no one actually cleaned this thing out yet.
I take my first tentative steps into the darkness, looking for the broken wires, and the true source of the problem.

I feel it a split second before my balance is robbed. Something thin, like a whip, knocked my feet out from under me.

I lose the bat immediately as it skitters off into the darkness. The flashlight bounces and rolls, the beam swinging crazily through the crawlspace. I can only see a little by its light. The beam’s pointed the wrong way.
I roll over, trying to see what hit me, raising my leg to kick.

There’s something small and pale on my thigh. Two points that glow red in the darkness stare at me.

Neither of us moves.
Is it her? Is it the same one, or another? If she came from around here, it could be another one. The small foot on my leg… It’s sitting down, with its foot holding my leg down. The strength from it is absurd. I can barely shift my leg at all.

Was the one I had before this strong? If she was, couldn’t she have just snapped that collar?

Two glowing lamps, like embers. They stare at me in silence. But…
I don’t feel any fear from this. It’s not normal for me. I should be afraid of this. Afraid of being pinned down in the darkness by something like this.
By a monster.

But there’s no fear.

“It’s you, isn’t it?” I know the answer even before I say it. I know there will be no answer.
The red eyes close slowly. Eyes made to drink in the light even in the depths of night. Eyes that are green like emeralds come the dawn.
The small foot slides off of my leg.
There’s a sound in the darkness, and a presence.

Two red eyes open right in front of me. They hover in the space between my legs, even with my own eyes.

She leans closer, until her face is right in front of mine.
Those eyes. I can’t read those eyes. I can’t tell what she’s thinking, feeling. Those eyes, like rubies at night, emeralds by day, stare at me.

There is a sound in the darkness, faint and soft. A feminine sound. Three small noises, so fragile they could be lost in the silence.
“I’ll do it.”

My breath catches in my throat, my eyes widening. My mouth is hanging open. She’s so close now I can feel her breath on my tongue.

“I will be your Starter.”

[Lycodrake]

...holy shit does Chu know how to freak someone out. X'D
Very nice.~

[Twelveseal]

Indeed. You try having a living lighting rod sitting between your legs, and you're not sure if it likes you or not. I think Aurum's life was shortened by that. Then again, naked girl sitting between legs is also good for lengthening things.

[Lycodrake]

Yeah, definitely a different sort of suffering.
Me-thinks Aurum should invest in more rubber. XD

[Twelveseal]

In more ways than one, though that will be apparent in a later chapter~ >83

[Lycodrake]

lol, yeah. XD

[ItsaRandomUsername]

Shoot, I missed out on the pun back-and-forth. Nuts.

Oh, oh, wait!

Guess Aurum was concerned for his nuts in more ways than one.

...no one ever accused my jokes of being good.

[Erlkonig]

Oh dear, is it time for Electric Boogaloo?

[Twelveseal]

[Morning After]

I wake up slightly stiff and slightly sore, and very hot.
It seems like the AC’s still out from last night. I sigh and lever myself up out of bed. Looks like I shucked my sweat pants in the night again. And my boxers.
The hell did they end up way over there?
Ahhh… I guess last night really was that hot, wasn’t it? And wet. And noisy. I didn’t sleep well at all.

Heh. What perverted things are you thinking right now?
There’s no way in hell I did any of that. Fucking storm front moved in last night. Rained cats and dogs all last night, the humidity shot up, the heat stayed the same, and there was lots of thunder and lightning.

Speaking of lightning, Chu should be in the guest room right now.
Hrm… Should I wake her up first, or go get cleaned up?
Ahhh… Damn. I just realized the shower’s going to be cold as hell with the water heater out. Why’d she have to go and kill the power again? I should make her shower in that. Though… Yeah, she’d probably kill me if I did that.

I still can’t believe it. The little rat could talk the whole damn time. Knew every word we said.
Shit.
Me, mom, dad, even the Ero-Prof and his staff, all of us thought she didn’t understand a thing. In hindsight, it was pretty obvious. The way she acted, and the looks she gave us, she knew way too much. She was just playing dumb the whole time. We guessed, sure, but you can’t prove it unless you can catch her in it.

I sigh.
So this is going to be my partner on my pilgrimage, huh? I have a feeling I bit off more than I can chew.

I decide to get cleaned up already. The water won’t warm up enough in the pipes to make any difference, even if I wait. Besides, I’ve got a lot to do today, too.
After braving the sleeting shower and changing into some casual clothes, I decide I should talk to my parents first.
Believe it or not, they were already asleep by the time that mess under the house ended. And no, I haven’t screwed the mouse.
So anyway, I now have the pleasant job of informing my parents that last night I snuck a naked girl into the house. Who also happensto be a mouse. And is responsible for our current lack of electricity.

Ah! It seems I have perfect timing. As I walk into thekitchen, I find my mom giving my dad his lecture about eating right. Good ol’Cup Ramen. Does the trick every time.
Bracing for impact.
“And you! How many times have I told you that eating right is the first step to good health? You know better than to eat this… this…filth, when there’s food that’s both good and good for you in the refrigerator! All you have to do is reheat it. There’s even a nice spinach salad in there that doesn’t even need that much effort! What is it that possesses you two to eat this?” This could take a while. However, there’s a plan forming in the back of my mind.
My dad and I share a look.
We shrug in unison.
“You don’t know? Really? Is it just male stupidity? You went to more trouble to fix this junk than to eat a salad. And you have nothing to say for yourselves? Am I really going to have to explain the importance of balancing nutrients and the impact of diet on the immune system, development, and overall health? Do you really have nothing to say?”
“There’s a mouse.” Dad gives me a confused look. This isn’t according to our traditional pact.
“…… What?”
“There’s a mouse in the house. I saw it last night after the power went out. Actually, it might be a rat. It was pretty big.” Yeah. Like the size of a person.
“Oh good grief. One problem after another.”
“I think I can go get some traps at the store to…”
“No, no. The ones at the store won’t do. We can’t kill it after all. I’ll go get the humane traps out of the attic.”
“Be careful, it might be up there.” Like hell. I’m gonna be so dead when she figures this out, but at least she’ll be mad at me and not worrying about things she can’t control.
She’s gone just like that.
“You know, it’s not a good idea to lie to your mother. She can be…” The word scary is left unspoken.
“I didn’t lie. There really is a mouse. Sort of.”
“What do mean by ‘sort oh…’” I look at him after that odd ending. His eyes are kind of big. What’s he staring a…
Oh.

There’s a mouse.
In the doorway.
She’s naked.

“So that’s what you meant.” He blinks a couple times, but his eyes don’t move.
“Had fun last night, did we?”
“Uhhh, No. Not really. Apparently, she took out the poweragain last night.”
“So you brought her inside instead? Your mother’s not goingto like that.” He glances at his coffee cup, then at the camping percolator on the counter. What can I say, dad likes his coffee.
“Yeah, well… There were some unusual circumstances. Hey, why are you digging through the garbage over there.” She’s bent over the garbage can looking in. Not that I mind the view, it’s showing off her little breasts from here. Even if I don’t know about actually having sex with her, I can still appreciate the show. Does this make me a bad person?
“Hungry.” A small voice.

Suddenly I’m wearing coffee.
“Ah! Shit that’s hot dad!” Did you really just do a spit-take on me!?!
“She can talk!?!? I thought she was wild!!! Why isn’t shewearing clothes!?!?”
I’m busy using paper towels to mop the hot coffee off me.
I sigh.
“I’m pretty sure she is wild. I don’t think she’s a runaway. She might be abandoned. And she’s not wearing clothes because the only clothes that will fit her are Laurel’s. I don’t think I’d survive stealing her clothes.”
“But, if she’s wild, why can she talk?”
“I’m right here you know. You could just ask.” We look at each other.
“Okay, why can you talk?”
“Besides picking up a lot of words just listening to people chatting with these ears of mine? You people teach others to talk and then set them free or abandon them. More of us understand you than you think.”
“Wait, you mean other Moemon? One’s people abandoned or returned to the wild?”
“Mmm. Sometimes they teach.”
“Ah, hey, wait a minute. You know, you don’t have to dig through the garbage for food. We’ll feed you. It’s not like I brought you in here to starve you. There’s food in the refrigerator. Not like we can eat it after the power went out.”
She looks at me, and then at where I’m pointing.
“This thing? Ah, you must have refilled it. So it’s called arefrigerator.” It seems like she knows the words, but might know what they refer to. Huh. I wonder if she can read.
“Yeah. That’s a refrigerator. We store food and other things that need to be kept cold in it so they last longer.”
“Mmm. Useful. But it’s not very cold.” She moves in front of the door.
“Hmmm. I wonder why that is.” She glances back at me with a confused look. Then focuses on the fridge again.
She opens the door with her back to us. She looks inside.
And then she bends over to check the bottom shelves.

I can see…

Everything.

All conversation around the table ceases. A naked girl has just bent over in a room whose only other occupants are men.

There is a moment of silence.

Two men appreciate the scenery.

“I found the traps!”

Two men prepare to die.

Oh.
Shit.

“Oh.” The only sound out of mom’s mouth. Our eyes are lowered in shame. My father stares a hole in the bottom of his coffee cup. I attempt to see the broken wiring through the floor.
She looks at our flushed faces. At the naked girl looking around the fridge door at the newcomer. Then she looks at my dad.
“Muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu…” This sound, it’s the banshee. A banshee just called our names.

I remember the wise advice of Professor Sequoia. ‘Run. Run fast.’ Unfortunately, this is an enemy I can’t hope to outrun. Like gazelle before the graceful cheetah, we meet our deaths in the early morning.
“GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!”
……………
………
…

[Erlkonig]

Mirandowned.