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Thread: Create-a-Servant

  1. #3141
    HSTP 500 Internal S ervant  Error aldeayeah's Avatar
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    Well, it's actually quite reasonable.

    I guess you don't have a problem with specialists being better than Gil in their specific shtick, as long as they're not better generalists than him?

    (Also Karna and Jeanne are Nasu Servants, so I consider them totally fair game)
    Last edited by aldeayeah; October 29th, 2012 at 02:33 PM.

  2. #3142
    吸血鬼 Vampire Zephyr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by qsurf View Post
    Houyi's a god if I remember correctly and Karna belongs in Aprocrypha...nothing shall mentioned about that. Plus, it's WoG, Nasu mentioned that if Gil got serious, he will win the War in 3 days.
    He lost the divinity and become mortal... And then become a god again, or no... There are a few variations on the myth.

    And yeah, Gil is epic. GoB Spam + Ea + Enkindu = sure dead

    Quote Originally Posted by aldeayeah View Post
    Well, it's actually quite reasonable.

    I guess you don't have a problem with specialists being better than Gil in their specific shtick, as long as they're not better generalists than him?

    (Also Karna is the only Nasu Servant in Apocrypha, so I consider him totally fair game)
    Yeah, better generalist than the guy with "all the powers" of all heroes is impossible
    Last edited by Zephyr; October 29th, 2012 at 02:32 PM.

  3. #3143
    吸血鬼 Vampire TheDivineDemon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seika View Post
    *Snips Doctor Who*
    Quote Originally Posted by qsurf View Post
    *Snips Doctor Who*
    So wouldn't his stagey in the War be lay low, observe, if you die take advantage of the new face, make advanced tech from scrapes and get the guy that just killed you?

    Like you said he's a decent fighter but nowhere near the level of other servants, so he'd have to fight smart and dirty.

    p.s. I'm now just assuming he's Illya's servant. She could do it for Hercules she can do it for the Doctor.
    See me wasting my life on fanfics here.

  4. #3144
    Mate, that's noice as fuck! Vagrant's Avatar
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    Since everyone's talking about him and I'm no longer using this guy for a planned fic, I may as well put up my version of ol' Uther. He's a bit copy-paste in terms of skills because I ditched the idea of using himn early on when he was mostly framework, but he's a viable Servant regardless.


    Name: Uther Pendragon
    Class: Saber

    Parameters:
    Strength: A
    Endurance: B
    Agility: B
    Mana: C
    Luck: B

    Background:

    Uther is a great and regal king, a man who was admired by the majority of people he ruled over. He has a jovial and rather carefree attitude, his outlook on problems often being “We will do what we need to do and deal with the consequences later”. He applies this outlook to his personal life as well, and it is here where he is perhaps at his weakest, morally speaking. Whilst he is a good man, his kingship has gone somewhat to his head and so sometimes he will do things because he feels he can, and not for any good reason otherwise. This was the case when he stole a night with the wife of his vassal Gorlois, an act which caused some consternation amongst his closest subjects and resulted in a war erupting with Gorlois. Uther bears a heavy heart over his foolish actions of youth, as his reflections on the past have made him realise his error in prioritising himself over his kingdom in moments of weakness, and this shame will never leave him, but it is something he bears in secret and mostly hides with his flippant attitude. Uther carries with him the great blade Caledfwlch, a sword descended from Gram and a symbol of his kingship. Though Caledfwlch was shattered in the war against Gorlois and was later reforged into both Caliburn and Clarent, it is the sword he has taken form with due to his long use of it ever since his victory over Paschent, son of the betrayer Vortigern and leader of the Saxons, on the morning after he beheld the burning dragon-head comet that heralded his destiny as king of Britain.

    Uther has appeared in his prime, a man of approximately twenty five, a young blonde warrior with a distinctive antenna of hair curling over the top of his head. He wears armor very similar to what his daughter Arturia would eventually wear in combat, and in fact looks much like one would imagine her older brother to be like. He’s essentially got the looks and most of the personality traits of Archetype Saber.

    Class Skills:

    Riding (A): One's ability to ride a mount or use a vehicle. All creatures but those of Phantasmal Beast and Divine Beast-rank can be used as mounts and Uther can drive or pilot any modern vehicle at a level comparable to a stuntman or racer.

    Magic Resistance (B): Cancel spells with a chant below three verses. Even if targeted by High-Thaumaturgy and Greater Rituals, it is difficult for him to be affected.

    Personal Skills:

    Charisma (B): This is the natural talent to command an army. Increases the ability of allies during group battles, and has charisma suitable for a king of his renown. Hailed as the Dragon Head of Britain, Uther can confidently command legions of troops and inspire his kingdom’s people to do as he dictates.

    Prana Burst (B): This rare skill is the increase in performance caused by impregnating one's weapons and body with magical energy and instantly expelling it. Simply put, recreating the effect of jet burst by expending large amounts of prana. At this level, Uther is able to destroy weapons that are not on the level of a divine mystery with only a few strikes, and his defenses increase dramatically while this is active, although it is highly mana intensive. Fortunately, with his incredible dragon reactor this isn’t really an issue for Uther.

    Magecraft (B): Whilst Uther appears to be the quintessential knight-king, he has a surprising wealth of thaumaturgic knowledge, having studied under both Myrddin and Merlin, grand druids of their age, and having had detailed discourse with Taliesin, another wise magus. His knowledge of magic is mostly couched in druidic rituals and nature invocations, as well as a minor degree of runic magic and other basic forms of thaumaturgy. Uther is at least as accomplished a magus as an above-average modern magus, his particular focus being in Wind elemental magic thanks to his Origin of Shifting. It was this focus that resulted in his creation of the Great Enchantment of Britain acclaimed as invisibility, after years of study and devotion.

    Factor of the Dragon (A): Before Uther became the king of Britain he was imbued with the essence of the dragon, thus taking up the title Pendragon. This has converted his prana into that of a dragon, and as a result he has unique Magic Circuits that transcend those of regular magi. His Magical Core acts as a factory that with the right spark to start it off can churn out enormous amounts of prana continuously, fueling his Phantasms with plenty of juice left over. His dragon reactor is perhaps greater even than his own child Arturia’s while it is active, allowing him to function with essentially limitless prana as long as he has a minor trickle coming in from his master’s contract.

    Caledfwlch
    Blade of the Dragon Head


    Type: Anti-Unit
    Rank: B

    Description: The original blade that would someday be reforged into Caliburn after it was shattered (and a single shard of it mixed into the metal used to forge Clarent), this kingly blade is a distinct prototype for what Caliburn would one day become, and thus possesses similar powers, though not to the same extreme as Caliburn possesses. Where Caliburn will sear the insides of the foe with blazing light, Caledfwlch instead burns with a dull glow constantly, and when striking it expels the light in a short burst, allowing the user to penetrate and pierce more effectively, reducing the Endurance rank of the target by one rank while striking. If the attack does pierce the opponent significantly enough the light of this blade will burn the opponent from the inside, causing the foe to suffer a painful status drop across the board. The prana cost for this blade is high as it is constantly burning it up at a great rate to produce the deadly glow that imbues the blade, thus only someone like Uther can make use of it optimally.

    Three Great Enchantments of the Island of Britain
    The Progenitor Wind King

    Type: Barrier
    Rank: B

    Description: Uther Pendragon was once in possession of one of the Three Great Enchantments of the Island of Britain, which he passed down to his Enchanter Knight, Menw. This Great Enchantment was the rare talent of invisibility, and was eventually passed down to Arturia as her Invisible Air technique. Uther’s original form of the talent is a more defensive and supporting enchantment, which folds wind multiple times over to distort light around Uther’s entire body, rendering his outline blurred, broken and hard to discern details from, save for a chaotic shimmer and the dust or atmospheric disturbances that may be kicked up by the winds swirling around him. Because the wind around him is densely folded and constantly in motion it acts as a defensive barrier alongside the invisibility effect, effectively halving the damage from regular attacks and throwing projectiles off course, making it harder to hit Uther accurately. Against Noble Phantasms it serves to Rank down the attack’s strength by one rank if the Phantasm is Rank B or lower. With focus and a much higher prana burn Uther can expand the wind barrier into a dome around him, rendering anything within the dome semi-invisible, as well as providing them the defensive benefits. However, Uther must concentrate to do this and so whilst sustaining the barrier he cannot engage in combat.

    Draconic Comet
    Portents of Monarchy

    Type: Barrier
    Rank: A

    Description: When Uther was a young knight he had a vision of a blazing red comet, shaped like a dragon, providing portents of his destined kingship. This is what imbued him with the factor of the dragon and granted him the epithet Pendragon, meaning the Dragon Head. By calling upon this Bounded Field Phantasm the draconic comet appears in the sky, sharply raising the draconic aspects of any Heroic Spirit in the area who possesses a dragon’s attributes. This can raise Uther’s draconic attributes to A++ temporarily, negating status impairments and boosting Magic Resistance up a full rank as well, along with granting enhanced senses and endurance in the form of Instinct Rank B and Battle Continuation Rank C.
    Last edited by Vagrant; December 18th, 2012 at 01:11 AM.

  5. #3145
    Somebody on Spacebattles did a sheet for the Doctor. That one had a skill called "Time Lord Victorious", which allowed the Doctor to win no matter what given enough time.

    ...yeah, it was as broken as it sounds.

    The Uther one actually looks pretty good; I like the NPs in particular. Caledfwlch seems a bit low-ranked for its power, though. And Uther should probably have Mana A+ or at least A, if his dragon reactor was even more powerful than Arturia's.

    -0-0-

    —Servant Berserker—

    True Name: Tlahuicole
    Alternate Classes: Lancer
    Alignment: Lawful Insane (Lawful Neutral)

    Tlahuicole is a massive, powerfully built man with scarred skin bronzed by a life under the Mesoamerican sun. His only covering is a blue cloth wrapped around his waist to serve as a simple loincloth. His long hair is tied up and braided in the traditional warrior's style of his tribe, and crimson war paint like tear-tracks run down his cheeks. Jade earrings and necklaces, all that he was able to salvage from the looted bodies of his warriors, hang from his ears and neck.

    —Physical Parameters—

    STR: B+
    AGI: D
    END: A
    MGC: D
    LCK: C
    NP: B

    —Class Skills—

    Mad Enhancement, Rank C
    Berserker receives a one-rank increase in all of his physical parameters except Luck and Mana. In exchange, he loses the ability to speak and think properly.

    —Personal Skills—

    Battle Continuation, Rank B
    Berserker can continue to fight even after receiving fatal injuries, and he can only be killed by a decisive fatal blow. This ability is unaffected by Mad Enhancement.

    Charisma, Rank C
    As the former chieftain of the Tlaxcalan tribe, Berserker can boost the fighting abilities of allies during a group battle. While his domain and tribe were relatively small, he gained the favor of his enemy’s emperor and was granted command of multiple Aztec war parties, and so this ability is raised by one rank. This ability is sealed by Mad Enhancement.

    —Noble Phantasms—

    The Stone of Combat: Trial of Honor
    Rank B Anti-Unit (self): Range: 1-10; Maximum Targets: 1
    When activated, this Noble Phantasm creates a Boundary Field with a radius of ten meters around Berserker. Berserker himself cannot move more than one meter from the center of the Field. Enemies can enter or exit the Field as they wish, but only those who enter the field can successfully attack Berserker; any attack from outside except a Noble Phantasm two or more ranks above will not affect him. The Boundary Field lasts until Berserker has killed all opponents who enter or he has been killed himself.
    Last edited by SVNB Backup; October 29th, 2012 at 06:36 PM.

  6. #3146
    Time to burn some dread Daneel Rush's Avatar
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    This Servant is dedicated to Seika, who once said she wished to see this profile. This is probably the craziest, most overblown Servant I've ever made and will ever make, but I had a blast with this so I REGRET NOTHING.

    *******************
    *******************

    ENHEDUANNA
    Servant: Berserker

    Gender: Female
    Height: 164 cm
    Weight: 46 kg
    Three Sizes: 86/51/83

    Alignment: Chaotic Insane

    Appearance: A woman strikingly similar to the White Princess of the True Ancestors. Her features, however, are gentler and somewhat slightly less voluptuous. She is also about a bit shorter, and her hair is lighter in color and almost as long as her body is tall. She wears a white rolled turban on her head and a surreal flounced dress seemingly made of particles of silvery light which give its lustrous surface a liquid appearance.


    Strength D
    Endurance C
    Agility B
    Magic A++
    Luck B
    Noble Phantasm EX


    Class Skills:
    * Mad Enhancement: Raises basic parameters in exchange of hindering mental capacities.
    B – Rank up for all parameters, but takes away most of sanity. The modifications are already included in the values shown above.

    Personal Skills:
    * High-Speed Divine Words: The power to activate Thaumaturgy without the use of Magic Circuits. The language of the Age of Gods, back when words played a heavy role in spellcasting. As such, it is power long lost by modern magi.
    E – One-line Magecraft can be reduced to Single Action. Casting time for more complex spells is halved. Rank reduced due to summoning in the Berserker class (her original rank is A).
    * Invocation of the Moon: The ability to draw on an alien source of power by virtue of a connection to the lunar body. A mysterious power that can be both sacred and profane, depending on its source.
    B – Rank up for all parameters as long as the Servant is exposed to the light of the moon. The Servant’s rank in this Skill has been restricted by the limitations of the Servant container and further more by the Berserker class (her original rank in this Skill is A+++). The modifications are not included in the Parameter ranks shown above.
    * Language of the Unknown: The Skill granted to Servants who masterfully wielded the Unified Language in life. The unconscious reconstruction of knowledge hidden in plain sight. Interpretation of dreams, true divination, instinct and the “sixth sense” that warns of impending threats are all encompassed within this Skill.
    A – The Servant may unconsciously discover the identities of other Servants through dreams, and experience true precognition. Not usable under Mad Enhancement.


    Noble Phantasm:
    Agrun-kug
    The Universe in Her Eternity
    (The Sacred Bedroom)

    Type: Anti-Army (Reality Marble)
    Rank: EX
    Range: 1-99
    Maximum number of targets: 1000 people

    The greatest Magecraft; exaltation of the soul of the supreme High Priestess. Enheduanna’s Reality Marble, awakened by her longing for the Millennium Castle Brunestud she glimpsed for a very brief moment as her soul was enveloped and stirred by the Ultimate One of the moon. She dreamt of stepping into that place, as the scenery of that starlit castle frozen in eternity filled her soul with desire and envy. Thus, the externalization of her soul became an Elysian field of blooming flowers caressed by sparkles of silver light, the infinite garden forever cloaked in night and guarded by a looming silver moon at the crown of the sky. She cannot recreate the castle, replacing it then with a ziggurat—the house of radiant light, in imitation of the temple of Nanna in Ur. But Enheduanna’s inner world is frozen: there is no wind and not a single blade of glass moves, like a photograph forever capturing a single moment of existence.

    Agrun-kug captures the moon for Enheduanna: the moon inside the Marble becomes the “true moon”, and the one in the outside world is nothing but a fake. For this reason, all abilities connected in any way to the moon cease to work outside of the Innate Bounded Field. However, this is just a side effect of capturing the moon. To the ancient Sumerians, the moon was the representation of destiny and time itself. By seizing the moon inside her Marble, Enheduanna has seized control of all time past, present and future. All history, causality and eternity belong to her and are defined by her. The Reality Marble is the pinnacle of this unhinged woman’s self-centeredness: eternity becomes the world that knows no history but her own. This is the reason nothing moves in Enheduanna’s inner world: a captive eternity is a world in which time has forever frozen. All history is reduced to the existence known as Enheduanna, and thus, no other legend could possibly exist. Heroic Spirits that are not destroyed by the annihilation of their history are nonetheless reduced to powerless mongrels, for this is the only thing they could possibly be in Enheduanna’s eternity. This is the core of the High Priestess’ soul: the center of Enheduanna is that Enheduanna is foremost and eternal.

    It is highly unlikely that Enheduanna could manifest this supreme Magecraft in Holy Grail War. However, like Unlimited Blade Works, she can tap into a limited aspectual manifestation of her soul without fully deploying the Innate Bounded Field. In the same way eternity freezes the flow of time other than Enheduanna’s, an infinitely short period of time could be considered to amount to the same thing. Time is a continuum, so no matter in how many pieces it is divided, each piece can still be considered an eternity. Thus, Enheduanna’s personal eternity can also manifest as manipulation of the instantaneous—the capability to act in instants so short as to be considered that no time passed at all. This is the “god speed” that allowed her to match Crimson Moon’s imperceptible attacks.


    Background

    Unmistakably, the greatest wielder of Magecraft that has lived in planet Earth. Born already a gifted genius, she offered her soul to the most terrible being and became an existence of absurdity. Monster, tyrant, deviant—all that, at the same time. Insane Princess, Bride of the Crimson Moon.

    She was born the daughter of the Akkadian emperor Sargon the Great and his Sumerian wife Tashlultum in Akkad during the 23rd century BCE. Born the princess of an empire, the daughter of a man beloved by the gods, she was raised in grandeur and educated to love herself and to revel in her own greatness and the worship of the exuberant masses. Thrice blessed by three gods—An, Inanna and Nanna—, she was a naturally born genius of immaculate beauty; perfection given form. The most pompous, beautiful, powerful and gifted princess thus became a symbol of the glory of the Akkadian Empire; a symbol her father used most intelligently. To earn the acceptance of the Sumerians he had subjugated and legitimize his claims over the lands, Sargon respected their religious traditions and sent his precious daughter to the temple of Nanna in Ur—the daughter of the king as the en-priestess in charge of the giparu, a dynastic marriage between princess and god, and thus the High Priestess becomes the living incarnation of Ningal, wife of Nanna. She became Enheduanna, “High Priestess, Ornament of Heaven.” Her symbol thus became the full moon, the symbol of Ningal walking the earth—that is the “Ornament of Heaven”. Thus the High Priestess is two times princess: daughter of the king and daughter of An, father of all gods. She was not the first High Priestess, but she was the greatest: Moon Princess Enheduanna.

    Her work was extensive, yet simple: restoration of the giparu, the residence of the en-priestress; purification of temple areas and exorcism of disrupting spirits; literary composition to praise her king and the gods and management of offerings. That peace ended when the ruler of Ur, who she refers to with the generic name ‘Lugal-ane’ in her compositions, aimed to separate himself from Sargon’s rule. Lugal-ane seized control of the temples, profaning them with uncouth and wanton destruction. Unable to unleash harmful magic within the hallowed walls of the moon god, Enheduanna was humiliated, beaten until her diaphanous beauty was permanently marred, stripped of her priestly garments and deprived of her purity by the terrible usurper. To add insult to humiliation, she was thrown out of the walls of Uruk with no other possession but a plain bronze dagger, an obvious hint as to what she should do, having had everything taken from her—no longer pure, it was obvious she would not be favored by the gods anymore.

    She had lost much indeed: her beauty, her purity, her position, her pride, her riches and her connection to the gods. Even after all hope departed her, there were two things left: powerful magic and terrible hate.

    She wandered the lands of Sumer for many moons, naked and dirty, defiled to the point nobody moved to her aid, disturbed by her scarred visage and her deranged, blasphemous mutterings. She mocked the moon god, Nanna, for abandoning her after her dedicated service. She lashed at Inanna, demanding proof of her supposedly awesome might in the form of vengeance delivered to her enemies. She cursed and cried incoherently, unleashing reckless sorceries in her passing, until the moon indeed answered.

    Its name was Crimson Moon Brunestud. Having recently reached an agreement with Gaia, the Ultimate One of the moon had just manifested in the planet to begin its plans. It looked at the greatest civilization of magic of the time, the mighty land blessed by Divine Spirits and riddled with powerful wielders of the magical arts, and saw only the taint their arcane forces caused in the world that embraced them. And the direst, most powerful of them all was a reckless, wandering beast constantly calling his name, the name of the moon.

    They fought, and it was glorious. Beautiful destruction, orchestral anarchy, and two monsters that would just not die. She sliced a mountain at its base and flung it; its Knight Arm restored the mountain to its rightful place. It rose the waters of the Persian Gulf as a massive tidal wave; she pushed them back with a swipe of her arm. She called upon the wrath of lightning, the roar of thunder and the raging flames; its impossible existence restored itself faster than she could harm him. It attacked at speed that defied the speed of gods; she countered it with the greatest gift of precognition. She unleashed the most terrible wind magic, a pillar of raging currents stretching from the earth to the gods’ heavenly realm; it was not touched by its fury. It retaliated with an even more powerful vortex, making the earth shatter and the sky cry and howl in agony; even as her body fell apart, her hatred and scorn held it together once more.

    It could not love her, nor could it hate her; things such as love or hate are alien to Type-Moon. It could, however, acknowledge her and her incomprehensible, beautiful fury. The Counter Force it intended to create for Gaia could not be made entirely in its image—after all, it was not a thing of this world. As they fought, they touched, they embraced, they merged, until her skin was his and her skin and his were one and the same, the unfathomable body replaced-reformed-reconstructed-reimagined in a form like hers but his and only his. His eyes her hers as well, but they were also reflected in hers, madness merging into madness and never adding up because the result was nonsensical and inconsequential. It became he, she became it.

    Female True Ancestors were uncommon, but the very first of True Ancestors was a female, built in the image of beautiful, insane Enheduanna. The name of this first of earthbound vampires has been lost to history. Enheduanna called her Inanna, her daughter.

    Be it known that you are lofty as the heavens!
    Be it known that you are broad as the earth!
    Be it known that you destroy the rebel lands!
    Be it known that you roar at the foreign lands!
    Be it known that you crush heads!
    Be it known that you devour corpses like a dog!
    Be it known that your gaze is terrible!
    Be it known that you lift your terrible gaze!
    Be it known that you have flashing eyes!
    Be it known that you are unshakeable and unyielding!
    Be it known that you always stand triumphant!

    Two monsters in the guise of women, calling themselves priestess and goddess, reclaimed the lands of Sumer for Sargon and the temple of Nanna for their own. Enheduanna and her personal goddess, Inanna, were immortalized by the priestess’ own anthems; her work a baleful, profane gift to humankind; an ominous record of the birth of Crimson Moon’s progeny.

    The Heroic Spirit, Enheduanna, could have been the glorious priestess of pristine beauty who reclaimed her rightful place with the favor of the gods, had she lived a normal human lifespan. But she was no longer truly human, nor was she a True Ancestor, yet something above a “mere” Dead Apostle. After faking her death she took to roaming the lands with her “daughter”, lurking behind all moon cults in the following 3500 years. Enheduanna even outlived her Inanna, who eventually succumbed to her blood thirst and departed to a slumber eternal around the end of the Age of Gods. The foremost priestess of Sumer died in the Late Middle Age at the hands of the other one given the title of Moon Princess. It was not Arcueid Brunestud’s superior might that defeated Enheduanna, however, for it could not have been possible for the fledging shinso to overpower the supreme wielder of magic.

    It was nostalgia. Nostalgia killed Enheduanna.

    Arcueid looked too much like her cherished daughter.



    Keywords

    Aga – The rolled turban Enheduanna wears atop her head. It is ensorcelled to never slip off no matter how strongly she accelerates. Woe to the one who knocks the turban off her head, even if accidentally—the aga is the symbol of her status as en-priestess and moon princess. Whoever takes it off her can consider his life forfeit.

    Language of the Unknown – The original language was already on the verge of extinction in Enheduanna’s time. The en-priestesses of the Dynasty of Akkad might as well have been their last practitioners, as they received it from the gods upon their ritual marriage ceremony with Nanna. Enheduanna, effectively equal to Ningal, was the last true master of the Unified Language, which granted her incomparable understanding of the world around her. The ultimate wisdom unhampered even by her madness was what allowed her to match Crimson Moon Brunestud. Unfortunately, unlike Greek hero Herakles, she loses this superior insight when submerged in the Mad Enhancement.

    Personality – Naturally, as a Berserker-class Servant, Enheduanna is drowning in madness and hate. She is a growling, hungry war hound, eager to unleash cataclysmic spells upon anyone she deems too bothersome to exist. Take away the Mad Enhancement, and Berserker Enheduanna is still quite unhinged. She is the woman who stands at the pinnacle of power, bride and nemesis of the Crimson Moon, and she is well aware of her greatness. Believing herself more beautiful and more powerful than any other human, she demands more than mere respect: Enheduanna expects nothing less but complete, worshipful adoration, for she is like a god in anything but name. She is a charismatic and skillful leader of the masses—after all, she was able to keep appearances and act as the religious pillar of Akkad despite her profane ways. She revels in comfort, although what she finds comfortable might differ from what everybody else assumes to be such.

    Berserk Magus – While the Berserker container certainly limits her spellcasting capacity, a diminished Enheduanna is still a magus of the highest category, whose mere utterance can tear apart the mightiest temples built in the Age of Gods. Furthermore, as the premier priestess of the Akkadian Empire, her anti-spirit capabilities are unmatched in human history, thus making her spells extremely dangerous to any Servant without potent resistance to magical effects. After all, madness means little if even random gibberish carries the weight of a word of power. Thus, the Berserker Enheduanna has no control over the magic she unleashes in her deranged utterances, which makes her immensely more dangerous and utterly unpredictable—and a nightmare for her Master. Furthermore, the ultimate magic user will be naturally limited by her Master’s capability to supply her with prana. Unfortunately, Enheduanna cannot be summoned as Servant Caster—her innate magical capabilities are simply too powerful for the Heaven’s Feel containers.

    urudGagula – Spear of the Goddess Standing at the Top of Creation (Ancient Nail)
    The ultimate destructive spell; a pillar of ferocious winds that carve a vorpal road between heaven and earth. Wind rotation at speed such that the air ignites and the friction unleashes a maelstrom of lightning and flame within the slashing vortex. Beautiful destruction such that Brunestud of the Crimson Moon was compelled to imitate it.

    Both maximum range and scale of damage are off the charts. This ultimate spell is beyond the reach of the Servant Berserker, although the most reckless and thoughtless and stupid of Masters might use a Command Seal to make it possible…
    Last edited by Daneel Rush; January 26th, 2013 at 05:11 AM.

  7. #3147
    Mate, that's noice as fuck! Vagrant's Avatar
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    That... was not what I would have expected from an Enheduanna profile. Possibly the first identified author of either gender in history? Sounds like a Caster yeah? Nah, let's make her a Berserker. I'm not sure how your thought process works Daneel, but it is amazing nonetheless.


    I like that her abilities are fairly vague, it fits well with her ancient timeframe, and her RM sounds madhouse. Exactly how much can she accomplish in an instantaneous eternity? I don't think I really want to know, but it sounds very cool.


    Needless to say, this has shown up any concept of Enheduanna I've seen or thought up previously. I think I'll pop my in-progress profile in my "abandoned" folder now :/

  8. #3148
    Holy sheeeeeat, that was a read. Enheduanna has more than enough tragedy in her backstory to qualify for the Fourth War. Pride cometh before the fall, and all that.

    On another note, I do believe there are enough Servants for an all-Mesopotamian Grail War.

    Saber: Enmebaragesi/Gilgamesh

    Archer: Gilgamesh/Ashurbanipal

    Lancer: Enmerkar/Gilgamesh/Semiramis

    Rider: Etana/Gilgamesh

    Caster: Lugal-Kitun/Sin-leqi-unninni/Semiramis

    Berserker: Enheduanna

    Assassin: Semiramis/Gilgamesh
    Last edited by SVNB Backup; October 29th, 2012 at 07:31 PM.

  9. #3149
    分かろうとするな、感じれ Mcjon01's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vagrant View Post
    Possibly the first identified author of either gender in history? Sounds like a Caster yeah?
    No!

  10. #3150
    吸血鬼 Vampire
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    For the mesopotamian war it would obviously be

    Saber: Enmebaragesi

    Archer: Ashurbanipal

    Lancer: Enmerkar

    Rider: Etana

    Caster: Sin-leqi-unninni

    Berserker: Enheduanna

    Assassin: Semiramis

    That way Gil could be the church moderator!

    Ashurbanipal's master would be the band They Might be Giants! Also maybe we need to find a way to get hammurabi and sargon into the war!
    Last edited by firloz; October 29th, 2012 at 08:42 PM.

  11. #3151
    Κυρία Ἐλέησον Seika's Avatar
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    Having deliberately made Enmerkar to be about as broken as possible whilst still remaining even vaguely within the bounds of the Servant context, I'd actually be interested in seeing how he measured up.
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  12. #3152
    死徒 Dead Apostle
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    Out of curiosity ... couldn´t Enheduanna’s Reality Marbles manipulation of the instantaneous also be exploited for limited quantum manipulation and other stuff like that?

  13. #3153
    Quote Originally Posted by firloz View Post
    That way Gil could be the church moderator!
    Congratulations, you have just broken my mind.

  14. #3154
    Lost in the Elizabeths Verg Avesta's Avatar
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    Servant
    Name: The Woman
    Servant: Lancer

    STR: A
    AGI: A
    CON: A
    MGI: C
    LCK: C
    NP: EX

    Class Skills:

    Magic Resistance
    The protection against magical effects. Differently from the Resistance effects that merely rejects prana, this ability cancels the spells altogether.
    • EX: Not defense against magecraft, but simple inability of two forces understanding each other. Lancer’s existence goes against the idea of what is understood as “magecraft”, and thus, it cannot hurt her. However, indirect and natural forces from such spells still do damage against her.


    Detail:

    The Earth Goddess, and what was supposed to be.

    She is not a single woman or a figure of legend, but the manifestation of the prayers and worships meant for the idea of “Perfect Woman” that echoed across the world over ten thousand years ago. She did not exist as an individual that travelled across the land to spread her legend, but as a concept that existed everywhere at once to protect, to nurture and to help the humanity. These ideals, fantasies and miracles eventually merged into her current existence.

    She was the world’s, Gaia’s, gift to the mankind, a savior that would appear whenever they were in a need of a one. As such, she was began to the worshipped as an existence removed from the World. Even though she was supposed to be its greatest being, through the selfish wishes of the mankind, they eventually abducted the miraculous savior known as the Earth Goddess, and made her their own. But she did not grieve. After all, though she might have been the will of the Earth, she was made to save humans.

    She was Earth’s given Hero to the Humanity.

    In time, as the survival of Gaia deviated from the survival of Humanity, Earth Goddess’ mission was altered too. No longer did she work in harmony to preserve what was natural, as her target of protection forsake its connection to the planet. With the humanity becoming even more and more destructive, transforming into near-continuous spiral of destruction, so did the Earth Goddess too take the form of a spiral, gathering forth the miracles the Humanity had produced itself.

    And so, after 40 000 years, she is simply known as Alaya.


    Personality:

    Being unable to talk normally except in few stray words and sentences, Lancer prefers to simply answer with gestures, nods and such. This might make her seem slow, but in reality her mind thinks at a speed that makes even a wise human pale in comparison. As benevolent existence, Lancer accepts everything in humanity, and thus finds no qualms when it comes to fighting in Holy Grail War, even if she does not possess a wish herself. Her wish is simply the wish of her Master.

    Depending on the gender of the Master, the way Lancer treats him or her is altered slightly. In the case of a female Master, she takes on a more maternal role, her actions resembling those of an older sister. She will be concerned about the safety of her Master, and yet will playfully tease them. In the case of a male Master, Lancer is aware of how her presence affects those of opposite gender. Therefore, she will do her best to make her male Master realize that they should not fall in love with her. In the case they do, however, Lancer seeks to atone by making her Master as happy as possible.

    Despite her benevolent attitude towards her Master, Lancer can be very merciless towards any and all enemy. The more removed the enemy is from nature and humanity, and their now-fragile connection, the more Lancer sees them as something to destroy. When she begins her hunt, she can be stopped only by her Master’s order, or by her own destruction.


    Personal Skills:

    Natural Body
    The possession of a perfect body as a living being from birth.
    • A: The original and intended form of humanity, untainted by passing down on generations. Physical attributes are always treated as Rank-Up.


    Origin of Earth
    The nature as a being identified as a direct personification of the Earth itself. Unlike Divinity, this skill comes with the desire to worship, not having been worshipped. As so, belief of both people and earth are drawn towards the Servant.
    • A: Wherever she walks, Lancer is identified as the focus point of the ley lines in her vicinity. Therefore, she will always walk wherever Mana is richest. This naturally increases her luck and activates peoples’ desire to worship her.


    Form Shaped of Stone
    The powers of the Heroic Spirit may be used to boost those of other individuals by handing out idols prepared for the sole purpose of worshipping him, turning them into amulets that connect to his base of power.
    • A: As long as the idol is prepared to worship her and act in agreement with her, as long as the idol prepared fills the requirement of “perfect woman” for the individual, it may be used as an amulet.


    Unified Dialogue
    The language spoken before the dawn of time. It is the way of communication that was once destroyed, and was to be never spoken again. Those who hear it find it find it as the “truth”, and cannot disobey it.
    • A: As the original Unified Language, and it’s birth-form, the nuances are not varied. However, power is even greater, and high-ranked resistance is needed to guard against the effects.



    Noble Phantasms:

    Name: Imago
    Title: My Power is Thy Deepest Wish
    Rank: EX
    Type: ?
    Range: ?
    Maximum number of targets: ?

    The essence of what worshipped hero is. Lancer’s powers do not come from her, but from the faith stored in her image over 40 000 years. However, these powers need some sort of outlet for her to utilize in a form of a Noble Phantasm, the crystallization of her legend. Therefore, it is up to her high priest, her Master, to decide the shape of this power. As Lancer’s existence has always been channeled through Humanity, so is the anecdote of her power. Or it could be said that the anecdote itself is Humanity.

    Depending on the prayer of the Master, Lancer’s Noble Phantasm takes a form that is most suited around that prayer. For example, in the case of the Master praying for Lancer to gain more power, Lancer might adapt the form of a hybrid, a cross between Phantasmal cave-lion beast and a human. This would drastically boost her fighting attributes. Or in the case of a prayer of protection, Lancer might draw out the first form of protection ever made, the veil of clothing that was worshipped as an aspect of a fertility goddess. Whatever the prayer, this Noble Phantasm will adopt the desired effect around the forms of worship associated with Lancer, shaping them into the miracles known as Noble Phantasm. It could be said that in that sense, Lancer has unlimited Noble Phantasms at her disposal.

    However, as the scope of the power is dependent on the Master, so are the weaknesses also tied to what Lancer’s Master believes. If the Master believes that a certain attack can defeat Lancer, that will become the truth due to this Noble Phantasm. Therefore, a Master with an open mind and infinite imagination is the perfect partner for Lancer.


    Name: Aurignacian Spear
    Title: Hear the Song of the Ancients
    Rank: B
    Type: Anti-Unit
    Range: 2-5
    Maximum number of targets: 1

    A spear created from the bone of a Phantasmal Beast. It is hollowed out and fitted with holes that go through the whole length of the spear, allowing wind to pass freely through the weapon. This also makes the spear light to use, so despite its great length, it can still be used to deflect attacks that come from very close range.

    The true power of the Noble Phantasm is displayed when the wind rushes through the weapon. Due to the fighting-style that Lancer uses, after few adjustments, the spear will start playing a melody meant to accompany singing done with Unified Language. The power of such a melody is great, as those songs are still known as the oldest form of passing down legends through the generations. The song generated by the spear turns the battlefield around Lancer and her opponent into a scene of a legend, as if told by a great storyteller. It casts Lancer as the hero and her opponent as the antagonist, turning the scales of fate heavily to Lancer’s favor when it comes to victory. If the song is played long enough, it might affect the world around the two physically, transforming it into a more fitting location for such a clash of titans.

    It is only through the ability to overturn the fate that the effect of the song can be disregarded. After all, it has always been fated that the hero is victorious in battles in the end. Such is the basis of all legends, no matter the deviations that would eventually appear.

  15. #3155
    The Dragon of Dojima MssrNeko's Avatar
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    ......

    Holy crap.

    Spoiler:

  16. #3156
    吸血鬼 Vampire
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    so on a much more lighthearted note here's another random fictional servant!

    and why yes he IS wanked (rimshot)

    Saber/Berserker

    True Name: Rance
    height: around 5'11"
    Hair: Spiky brown

    This young twenty something wears what appears to be a hunter-green leotard covered with a breastplate, greaves, and a loincloth-belt combination.

    Rance is a genius swordsman who is well known for his crude, brutish behavior. He has been adventuring since a young age and over his life has garnered some renown (amongst royalty only as his adventures have been hidden from the public for various reasons) for saving three of the four major nations of his world. Adventuring alongside his slave Sill Plain he wields the legendary Demonic sword Chaos. Even when needing to rely on insane schemes or plans everything in his life has seemed to go his way in the end. In terms of personality he is an incorrigible pervert whose main hobby in life is carnal pleasure (though he does actually enjoy collecting shells as well). His wish from the grail is to once more be able to roam the land seducing women (whether they like it or not).

    Parameters
    Str C
    End D
    Agl D
    Mag E
    Luk A
    NP E-A+

    Class skills

    Saber

    Magic resistance C
    Riding E+++ (Pluses when riding a female :P)

    Berserker
    Mad Enhancement C

    Personal Skills

    Foolhardiness
    A
    At this rank Rance's Foolishness grants him the equivalent of an B rank in bravery, Imerial Priviledge, Mental Pollution, and
    Nature of a rebellious spirit.

    Charisma
    B+
    Nobody knows why, but people really seem to like this guy, especially the ladies.

    Pervasive Perversion
    A
    Rance's perversion knows know bounds, to the point that whenever coitus is imminent all of his attributes increase by a full rank.

    Pioneer of the stars
    A
    It seems that no matter where he goes societal upheaval is inevitable, and major changes to the country's power structure follow.

    Rance Attack!
    B
    This unique ability is similar to the skill prana burst, but rather than enhance his own abilities Rance fires the burst from his sword like a beam of energy.

    Noble Phantasm

    Demonic Sword Chaos E-A+

    This legendary sword was once the great thief Chaos, famed as a member of The Legendary Five who were each granted a wish by the Supreme God Planner Chaos's wish was for "the power to defeat the Dark Lords" in order to fulfill this wish he was transformed into the demonic sword chaos. Chaos is a sentient weapon that can be wielded by even a novice, but if his holder's personality and ego are not strong enough then he will have full control of their body. Chaos is well known as an extreme pervert, it is due to this that he and Rance get along so well.

    Though referred to as "the black sword" Chaos's blade is actually silver. Chaos has three golden eyes (two in the guard and one on the pommel) In addition to his sentience Chaos has many other notable abilities. His blade's sharpness depends on his motivation and can be enhanced via erotic thoughts (this determines the phantasm's base rank).

    Due to his history of bypassing the Immortality Fields that all dark lords are protected by Chaos holds the conceptual properties of "eliminating immortality" and "Bypassing bounded fields".

    Due to his history of having slain the Demon King Gale and many lesser Dark Lords his abilities increase when used against demonkind.

    Sill Plain C

    Rance's slave Sill was many things, an outlet to relieve his violent frustrations, a sex partner, but she was most known for her surprisingly powerful magics (for a slave), and her secret love for her master. Though she herself could not ascend to the throne with Rance she left him with the blessings of her magic. At all times Rance is protected by her contraceptive spell, ensuring he would never accidentally impregnate a woman. Also upon invocation of her name he is able to utilize the magics she had in life (raise magic a rank, gain access to C-ranked or lower thaumaturgy aligned with the schools of fire evocation and healing). If summoned as berserker these spells cannot be utilized (he still gains the increase to mana).



    Still not sure is Sill Plain should be a skill or a phantasm, I chose phantasm as it was more intuitive to implement it mechanically this way.

  17. #3157
    Mate, that's noice as fuck! Vagrant's Avatar
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    You didn't make him Lancer and make his Noble Phantasm his Hyper Weapon. I am saddened.

  18. #3158
    The Dragon of Dojima MssrNeko's Avatar
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    No Hyper Weapon NP. I am disappoint.

    Spoiler:

  19. #3159
    Pwetty Pwease? qsurf's Avatar
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    [QUOTE=Vagrant;998841]Name: Uther Pendragon[/QUOTE]
    *grins*

    Nice Job! Though I'm a little surprised that you didn't include his shapeshifting adventures somewhere in there...


    Quote Originally Posted by SVNB Backup View Post
    Congratulations, you have just broken my mind.
    Is it not a King's duty to watch over his subjects and lay down the law? Or in some regrettable cases, enforce it?

    How could the King of Heroes merely participate in a War such as this? When his true subjects are summoned into battle?

    No, of course he will not merely participate, all involved in this War know well the power he wields, all know of his status as their King, and all know far better than to even think about raising their hand against him. Who better than him to moderate the War? One who is so universally respected and feared?
    Last edited by qsurf; October 29th, 2012 at 10:41 PM.
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    Quote Originally Posted by I3uster View Post
    EX is a Pineapple/10




  20. #3160
    Κυρία Ἐλέησον Seika's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by qsurf View Post
    Is it not a King's duty to watch over his subjects and lay down the law? Or in some regrettable cases, enforce it?

    How could the King of Heroes merely participate in a War such as this? When his true subjects are summoned into battle?

    No, of course he will not merely participate, all involved in this War know well the power he wields, all know of his status as their King, and all know far better than to even think about raising their hand against him. Who better than him to moderate the War? One who is so universally respected and feared?
    Enmerkar would like this boastful little git who claims to be his grandson to come over here and get a thrashing. Apparently, he needs reminding of his place.
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