...it is tempting for us to think.
We are the saved. We are the chosen. The Lord has bestowed upon us his grace, has ransomed us from Hell, and we are free of the curse of sin.
All of this is true. By the blood of Christ, we have been made pure. The iniquity of our former selves has been washed away, made clean by his sacrifice on the cross. Before the Lord, we share in the righteousness of his Son, beyond the grasp of all the powers of Hell, all the schemes of Man. We are the elect, and our faith has been rewarded - and will continue to be rewarded - with both the manifold blessings we experience here on Earth, and with the promise of something greater even than eternal life, the immortality we have also surely been given - the promise of eternity spent in the presence of our Lord, where even a single instant would make the inconceivable, uncountable sufferings of this world seem a paltry fare.
All of this is true, but nevertheless it invites a pair of wicked conceits, to which I wish to forearm you against.
The first is that, the work is finished.
For though our salvation is assured, though our souls remain sheltered in His hand for all time, to claim we are therefore beyond sin is arrogance. Surely, I do not need to tell you. Surely, you understand this well already. We are only human, and 'all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,' as the Apostle Paul writes in his epistle to the Romans. As such, your struggle against sin must be everlasting, in so far as you remain on this Earth - for when we are taken up to be with the Lord, then we will be free of the temptations of the flesh, the corruptions of the spirit. But while we persist, we must all remain ever vigilant against that creeping death, that insidious spirit that seeks to come between you and the grace of God.
And so, I exhort you once again with the words of the Apostle Paul - "Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires. Do not offer any part of yourself to sin as an instrument of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer every part of yourself to him as an instrument of righteousness."
The second is that, the work is finished.
The greatest temptation, for those of us who are saved. To refine ourselves, seclude ourselves away in our pursuit of righteousness. To turn ourselves entirely towards the Lord, and discard all concerns for this earthly, fallen world. Even to go so far, should it not have been forbidden, to take our own lives, that we might witness the glory of the Lord in person that much sooner.
But no matter that it wears the outer guise of a saint, this conceit is nonetheless a most egregious sin. For does it not directly contravene one of the greatest commands of Christ, our saviour?
"Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you."
For to seclude ourselves from the world is to abandon the children of God, to deny them the salvation that we have received, not due to our own deeds or worthiness, but solely due to the grace of our Lord, to his boundless mercy. It is thus our duty to spread that gospel, to make known the love of our Lord to all people, which makes the great oceans appear as shallow, and the noon-day sun appear as darkness.
And so I bequeath to you your mission. Not in my name, nor in the name of this Monastery, nor in the name of the Holy Church itself. In the name of our Lord. In the name of God the Father, who sent his Son for our salvation; in the name of God the Son, who died on the cross to pay the debt incurred by our sin; and in the name of God the Holy Spirit, who remains with us now, to refine us, to transform us into servants suited to accomplish the will of God.
Go out into the darkness of the world. Hold high the banner of light that is the love of our Lord. Brandish firmly the blade that is the instrument of his justice. Strike out against the shadows, that those who cower in them might come to know light, might turn their hearts toward the Lord, and might share in the bountiful salvation that we have been blessed with.
Go now, and be the instrument of their salvation.
-Excerpt from speech given at the Induction Ceremony of the Fourth Chivalric Order of the Holy Church
What follows is a modest record of the actions of those who dared step out of the safety of the light, that they might be the light in the darkness. Of one individual in particular, whose personal struggle runs parallel to that rebirth.
Table of Contents
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Prologue - Redeemer
Book 1: Gatekeeper
-Chapter 1: Weapon
-Chapter 2: Shaman
-Chapter 3: Awake
-Chapter 4: Lair
-Chapter 5: Burn
-Chapter 6: Ash