The response to my questions has been overwhelming. Well never let it be said I've done nothing for no one, even though no one's asking.
A slightly sadder piece this time.
Character Focus: Ciel, A Conversation
Getting started is simple, it’s all about getting started. It was then far too bad that Ciel didn’t know in the least bit where to begin. Or more specifically it was far too bad that the person she’d usually begin with wasn’t exactly the most available. Being almost, kind of, somewhat dead at least partially now. Why did she so need to start with talking to Shiki, and why was it her luck that all she had was Arcueid? She sighed to herself, it all didn’t make sense.
The night sky sprawled out above her, the disheveled ground below, Ciel darted this way and that through the trees. If the world going mad and making copies of people hadn’t been bad enough, it had just decided to throw a copy of Nero Chaos into the milieu. Insanity just didn’t cover that level of wrong. At least her stay in this God forsaken country was proving more than just a princess babysitting job now. The contents of her report back however were yet to be decided. She would need more information.
Stopping atop a light pole she let her senses sweep out, mapping the supernatural currents near to her. Arcueid shone like a beacon, almost blinding her senses in one direction. Off to the side she sensed an echo, something of herself. Her grey twin then, offset in dimension now more than distance. She tracked that sense until she lost it in Arcueid’s glare. Her other half had some business in the direction of the Tohno mansion apparently. With more concentration the remnants of the shockwave that destroyed Nero appeared.
Ciel bent down slightly and felt for the power. The energy burst had come from an unknown participant in the Shiki/Arcueid/Nero tussle. Someone she hadn’t quite seen but knew was there none the less. She shuddered at the thought of what could make that kind of power burst on almost no notice. Definitely someone on the “get rid of” list. Though who or what she was loathe to find out.
In truth the burier was far more concerned with the presence of Shiki. Tohno’s loss had been a constant thorn in her side for the last six months. She’d seen death before, dealt with an unnatural amount of it and yet that one loss, her fault had caught her the hardest of any. It was, they were, all her fault anyway, weren’t they?
Now she had nothing but vampires and the remnants of the Tohno family to remind her of it. All of it. She caught herself thinking it wasn’t fair. That was a total crock. It was her burden to bear.
Her self flagellation was cut short by a spark of awareness. Someone was watching her. There were definitely eyes out there, eyes that had fallen upon the burier. Ciel quickly scanned her surroundings. In the air? No there wasn’t anyone else high up. On the ground then. She darted this way and that, trying to find the source of the unsettling feeling.
It took her a few moments to find someone, a man in jeans and a t-shirt, sitting on a park bench in her path. He looked back over his shoulder as her eyes fell upon him and waved curtly. His smile was so broad his eyes were closed and it looked as if he was expecting her. While the man didn’t look like anything much, someone probably just out of his teens with a decent but unremarkable build, the fact he had spotted Ciel made him obviously more than normal. No one had managed to do that when she wanted to be unseen even since her first arrival here. Another power in the area, someone new, was worth a bit of investigation.
The fellow leaned back on his bench, looking forward again. He didn’t seem the least bit surprised when Ciel landed before him in a ruffle of habit and clack of boots. The man simply spread his arms along the top of the bench and nodded to her in greeting. Ciel turned toward him, her eyes open, her hands ready to hold black keys.
“So who might you be?” she asked in her best authoritative voice. Remaining alert for an ambush she watched him flex his neck back and forth and smile at her, his eyes still closed.
“Who might I be?” he asked back, looking a bit put out, “Well for the sake of brevity I’ll avoid some smug answer and be straight. I’m a fellow that’s worried about you.”
“About me?” Ciel looked at the man a bit surprised, holding a hand to her chest, “Who are you, and what do you know about me?”
“Well, I’m the fellow in charge of getting two people back together. You know who by now.” the man pointed out, “If you need my name, it’s David and I’m pleased to make your acquaintance.”
“Ciel, charmed.” the burrier nodded back then thought a second and pressed on, “You’re the one working with Arcueid and Shiki, the one fighting Nero.”
“I helped.” David replied with a smile.
Ciel raised an eyebrow, “Helped? You nearly blew me out of a tree.”
“Pardon, pardon.” the man said with a bow on his chair, “Someone took me by surprise there, I’m usually much more… contained.”
Ciel crossed her arms in a huff, “And because you show up here, not apparently armed, but still holding your intentions to yourself, I’m supposed to bend over backwards and suddenly trust you?”
“While I don’t believe in complicating things by lying, I don’t remember ever asking you to trust me.” the main replied, leaning forward and resting his head in his hands, “I’m just here to help. I’ll fill you in on the happenings if you like.”
Ciel looked towards him, then away, thinking. With a sigh her shoulders slumped and she nodded. “I think you’d better. Anything to lessen the complication of this mess. I have a feeling I’ve really stepped in it this time.”
“Wonderful.” David replied, tenting his hands, “Would you like a seat?”
“I’d rather stand.”
“Then so shall I.” he remarked getting up and starting to walk around the small clearing they were in.
Ciel eyed the man warily, following his motion but not moving. He took a long breath, his back to her and paused a moment. Tilting his head he thought up what exactly what he needed to say.
“It wasn’t fair was it?” he asked, looking over his shoulder at Ciel.
‘What?” Ciel remarked, then looked down, realizing what he’d said, “No, none of it was fair.”
“Arcueid and Shiki, one you hate, one you admired. Both loving each other, yet star-crossed from the outset.” David added to her words, “Well like many I didn’t like it, but unlike most I had a promise, a very old promise to keep.”
“To what end?” Ciel asked.
“To see them together, and happy.” he responded, looking away again, “The flare of light at the moon, that was me keeping my word, and now all this is too.”
Ciel tried to hide her reaction but still even the trained Executioner had to take a step back. That kind of power was nothing to trifle with, and very few had it. She gritted her teeth and formed black keys behind her.
“You’re Trouble aren’t you.” escaped her mouth in a growl. It was a statement of fact, spoken as a name, not the usual vague generality.
“In every language ever spoken by man.” David returned with a smile, then looked back, “I’m not your Trouble at the moment though, you won’t need those.”
“You’re everybody’s Trouble.” Ciel spat, but still brought out her black keys and looking at them, dispelled the handful with a flick of her wrist, “How could you be following a promise to Arcueid and Shiki, you’re far older than both combined.”
“And their souls are far older than you know.” David pointed out, “Though Christianity has always had some trouble with cycles of rebirth. The gist of the situation is all simple enough in practice though. I took a universe where Arcueid died, and a universe where Shiki died, and pushed them together.”
Ciel’s eyes grew wide, “Are you even listening to yourself, what gives you the right… aargh what would that even do?”
“Gave them a new chance together, if everything works out right.” he replied, looking to the stars, “The universes were so similar most of them folded neatly into each other, only the people truly changed by the circumstances are any different between the worlds.”
“And that means?”
“Well, it means that as long as the people in the universes can get together with their doubles and agree on it, even if they don’t quite know what they’re agreeing on, then Shiki and Arcueid will have their chance.”
“So you’re going to bring back Shiki.” Ciel said pondering, “You picked one hell of a way. I suppose you talking to me means I’m one of the differences.”
Ciel looked out over the city beyond and thought about the grey version of herself roaming around, then added, “No I guess it’s obvious I’m one of the differences. So then why are you making these grand explanations to me?”
“Eh?” David remarked.
“Why me? Why aren’t you talking to the other Ciel, she’d be the logical one to get to.” the current Ciel pointed out, “I’d just be getting Shiki back. She on the other hand would have to agree to let Arcueid back into her world.”
“That is the truth I know.” the man remarked, nodding, “Yet with all that’s going on, I feel I need to be here. Feel you need my help more than she would. It seems odd to me, but while I know why, you feel less inclined to let Shiki back into your life than another Ciel would be to let Arcueid return. That’s quite a shock.”
“Really. I don’t see it.” Ciel said looking down, “Why would that be?”
“I don’t know Ciel.” David responded, adding some impact by using her name the first time, “Why is it that you don’t think you deserve it.”
“WHAT?” Ciel, who had been turning away almost rounded on David, “Why don’t I? What kind of person do you take me for. This is about Shiki and Arcueid.”
“And yet all our personal battles revolve around one person and one person only, ourselves.” David pointed out, “No matter who this whole thing is magically ‘about’ the way each of us takes it is by whatever impact is has on our selves. We might try to gloss it over, not want to be selfish or some other nonsense but we have to accept that to truly accept is a personal matter which has as much to do with our own faults and merits as much as it does with those we see in others.”
“So you think that for some personal reason I won’t want Shiki and Arcueid back together.” Ciel growled back, “Even if it meant bringing back Shiki to do it.”
“I never said that.” David remarked, shaking his head, “I said you don’t think you deserve it, and I need to help you with the why. Understanding ourselves and our motives is rather vital.”
Ciel shook her head angrily, glaring at the troublemaker with stern eyes, “What I’m not understanding is what you’re talking about. If this is about Shiki… Shiki… deserve… oh.” she ground to a slow halt, looking down and away, “Maybe I shouldn’t talk about this.”
“Really.” David said softly, “Odd then that it’s what I’m here to talk about.”
“It doesn’t matter!” Ciel cried out, her demeanor changing suddenly as she threw out her arms, “None of it matters, it’s all the same, always the same.”
“So change it.” the man replied in an impossibly matter of fact way.
“Change it? Change it?” Ciel spun about and stormed towards him, “How can I change the fact that Shiki died because of me?! How can I change the fact that I’m a CURSE. That everybody dies because of me.”
“By realizing it’s not true.” David said softly, tilting his head and smiling, “Facts change by perspective, and I must say your’s seem a tad off.”
“I killed them all.” Ciel growled, “My family, my friends, my whole town, and now Shiki too. People I cared about, people I didn’t know, everyone. I was cursed for the first part, killed over and over for doing it, cleansed again and again though I can never be, and now I make the mistake again and get another person killed. Tell me great old troublemaker, maybe you know what I deserve.”
“Ah the plight of the Immortal, living out years and years in grief about the ones they couldn’t save.” David almost laughed, "Bah what, have you been alive a dozen extra years? That's barely an extension. I'll bet some of those you knew are still kicking about. You might still have recognizable family."
“And how could I face them?” Ciel cried. The look in her eyes for the first time truly honest. A look of horrible pain and dread.
“You think yourself a curse, a curse on those you care about.” David remarked shaking his head, "I know, when I was changing, becoming this... I tried to kill all of my friends, managed to kill most of my friends... I know that look, that feeling, but I can tell you, it wasn't your fault."
"How would you know? You don't know my situation.”
"I don't need to, I can see it in your eyes.” the elder admonished, “The ones that really did it, they never take the blame, they deny it, resist it, they don't accept it. It's the ones like you, the guilt ridden ones, those with that look, those are the ones who would have never done it in the first place. The ones that blame themselves.”
“You can use pretty words David but you can’t change the facts.” Ciel shot back, tears in her eyes, “How can I accept Shiki back knowing what I did to him, knowing what will happen to him. To leave him to that monster.”
“Forgiveness is important.”
Ciel looked down and fell to her knees, words, her own and his defeating her more than a weapon ever could “So why can’t I?” she said, “Why can’t I trust why can’t I believe why is it that I can’t find it in me to even give them a chance to be happy?”
“You have to find it in yourself Ciel.”
"But my faith" she said, looking up from her knees, "Where is my faith?"
Sadly he walked over to her, putting a hand on her shoulder, "You know Ciel, sometimes it must be lost, sometimes to have something you must loose it, and when it comes back to you, only then do you know it was actually yours in the first place."
"Love." Ciel spoke the word blandly, "They say that about love."
She was surprised when she saw him walking away, laughing, and his remark in passing, "Heh, Well Ciel? What do you think faith is?"
The burrier looked down again. Her eyes on the ground. The troublemaker all but forgotten. Tiny drops of water splashed off the cement below her. For the first time she realized she was crying.
Giving in to it the mighty Executioner put her head in her hands and bawled.
Character Focus: Ciel, A Conversation, Finish
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