FROSTBITE and FLAMESTRIKE
Inside the Einzbern Castle, Present Time
The Priest
“Constantine! What have you done!” The voice of the man, who had left the room, came through the loudspeaker hanging in the corner. I fancied the head homunculus of the Einzbern Castle raising his eyebrow as if intrigued. The Scotsman with sword continued to stare at me. I wasn’t going to play that game with him.
Order of St. Dumas. Heretics, the lot of them. I don’t actually bear a grudge against that man. I just don’t think he has the right to call himself a Christian. Or to live, for that matter.
“I disabled the security measure and drained the tanks of this mana generator. I think it’s pretty obvious, isn’t it?” Constantine said. Jubstacheit started at this statement.
“Carmichael!” He said in a loud voice, making the hulk with the sword look away from me. “Please go to the generator chamber and kill all the homunculi and Constantine.” The Scotsman shrugged and got up.
“These homunculi were all locked in here because they were defective but couldn’t be wasted!” The other man’s voice said. “And now they are out for blood!”
Should I stop the Scotsman? Or shouldn’t I? Constantine said to wait for the sign. But he hadn’t told me what was the actual sign.
“Don’t be so dramatic, mate. There’s no way these girls can break out of the glass.” Constantine said arrogantly.
There was the sound of breaking glass. I believe you spoke too son, Constantine. “SHIT!” Both men yelled. Time for agonizing over decisions was over.
I cleared the distance between the man named Carmichael and myself in under a second. The way his eyebrows widened implied that he wasn’t expecting me to be this fast. That is good. It means that I have the advantage. The best way to incapacitate or execute a mundane human being is actually quite simple. Stop the heart and the deed is done. However, I will assume that the man I am dealing with is not an ordinary man and therefore apply more than the necessary amount of force necessary.
My fist connected with his chest. He is quite heavy but I manage to send him flying backwards.
Something tries to impale my heart from the back but my coat stops it. I whipped around to see the black haired homunculus, who I had the pleasure of electrocuting, was wielding silver wires. Ah, typical predictable Einzbern combat.
The homunculus tried to attack me with the wires once more. I simply caught them with my left hand and then punted him over to Jubstacheit’s chair. The man of the house had seen it fit to bow out of the situation. No matter, I have no quarrel with him anways.
I hear something and instinctively duck and roll out of the way. The Scotsman’s sword misses me by an inch. He stumbles over the carpet and loses his grip on the sword. It flies away and impales itself into the very unfortunate Mister Westinghouse.
The unfortunately late Mister Westinghouse. I do not imagine that he imagined himself being killed by a clumsy swordsman.
I stand up quickly and assess the situation. The black haired homunculus is back on his feet, surprisingly, and the Scot swordsman is pulling his weapon out. I can take them down individually but the two of them combined with no room to dodge might be a little more difficult.
Oh well, who am I to back down from a challenge?
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Inside the Einzbern Castle, Present Time
The Apprentice
I knew today was going to be a bad day. I just didn’t know how bad it was going to be. I blame all of this on the Spectre of Ossetia.
Behind me is a pack of blood-thirsty homunculi. Beside me is John Constantine. I and the one beside me are trying to outrun the ones behind us. We haven’t died yet.
“Where did all the doors go?” Constantine yelled in between gasps of breath. He yelled something else but I couldn’t catch it over all the din made by the screaming homunculi. We were running down a long stretch of doorless corridor.
“I hate you, John Constantine.” I yelled back at him. It was a completely pointless and even useless thing to say but I had to say it. I have never murdered someone before but right now, I could have. In fact, I plan to murder him in case we both survive.
The screaming homunculi were coming closer. No matter how much I exerted myself, the gap between us kept shrinking. It occurred to me, rather inconveniently, that I never exercised much. I prefer the sedentary life to the active one. Compared to me, Constantine seemed to have no problem in running. He was actually outrunning these damnable screaming harpies.
Damn him. Damn him to hell. I never hurt a fly in my entire twenty-seven years of existence and suddenly, I get caught up in this. I wanted to become a competent alchemist, perhaps marry into a small but affluent family of mages, have two children; preferably a boy and a girl, see them to fight to the death over the Family Crest and maybe go to Egypt. Was that all too much to ask for?
I ran out of breath. My legs betrayed me. I fell to my knees. This is suicide, my brain tells me. Get up and run! Constantine already seems to have gone miles ahead. I am about to be stampeded and torn apart by mindless brutes. I close my eyes and accept the bitter truth. Good bye, cruel world.
I mean it. Good bye, cruel world.
Nothing happened. The entire corridor seemed to have fallen silent.
Wait, silent? That can’t be right. Wasn’t I being chased by screaming women right now?
I carefully opened one eye. Then the other.
At the far end of the corridor stood twenty or so halberdiers. And behind them stood another twenty homunculi, ready to unleash a thaumaturgical fusillade. Behind me stood fifty or so unarmed and mostly female homunculi clad in their birthday suits. In between the two stood Constantine.
“Silversmith!” Lord Jubstacheit called out. “Are you unharmed?
“Yes sir!” I called back. “Why aren’t they attacking, sir?” I asked. I couldn’t help myself.
“Because they know when the odds are against them.” Jubstacheit replied. “Can you walk?” he asked.
“In a moment, sir. I need to find my legs.” I said. I was trembling too much to actually stand. I had come this close to dying.
“Oi, Acht! What are you going to do now? The generator’s kaput and your dirty little castle is out in the open.” Constantine said.
“Kill him.” Lord Jubstacheit simply answered, not bothering to play his game. But before any of the halberdiers could charge, before any of the homunculi could attack, there was a loud explosion.
And then Constantine smiled.
And then the floor suddenly gave away and we fell. I landed on something soft which cushioned my fall. It turned out to be one of the homunculi women who had broken her neck.
“What the fuck, Maiya?” Someone yelled. “Why did you do that?”
“My apologies. I did not intentionally destroy the floor. You seem to have compromised the castle’s thaumaturgical stability when you deactivated the generator. And I merely exacerbated it by breaking down the doors with the truck” Someone, a woman, replied. I turned my head slowly. Even if I was miraculously uncrippled, my body itself wasn’t hurt. I was facing difficulty in moving my neck.
“Oh so it is my fault that we are in this shit?” Constantine yelled.
“Yes.” The woman replied. I couldn’t understand what they were talking about. My head hurt so bad.
Constantine was arguing with a woman with short, black hair. The homunculi, the ones who had survived, were just standing there, looking terrified and confused. I was still sitting on a dead body and was being thoroughly ignored. Why wasn’t anyone coming to rescue me?
“We need to do something about all these.” Constantine gestured at the homunculi.
“We did not come to save them and we cannot afford to save them.” The woman said dismissively.
“Do you want to stay here?” Constantine suddenly said to the homunculi. The homunculi didn’t answer. With any luck, Constantine wouldn’t realize that they don’t understand English.
“We don’t know.” One of them answered. Oh goddamn it, how come one of them knows English?
“Listen, I don’t know what the Einzbern are going to do to you once they recapture you but I don’t think it’s going to be pretty.” Constantine said. “So answer me one more time. Are you going to stay here and be used as things? Or are you going to escape and be free?”
There was still no answer. It seems as if fate was favoring me at last.
“This is futile.” The woman said and started walking away. “I have located Ilya’s room. Come along, Constantine.”
The homunculi were doing something but I couldn’t tell what was it. My vision faded.
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Inside the Einzbern Castle, Present Time
The Priest
This has started to become extremely irritating. Actually, it was annoying from the beginning but I have only realized it right now. The heretic refuses to stay dead no matter how much I try and the homunculus is fast enough to evade all of my attempts to hit him. None of this would have happened if I had my Bible and Black Keys.
The heretic made another clumsy effort to take my head while the homunculus tried to slit my throat with those silver wires of his. I evaded them both and tried to get out of room but was blocked by the swordsman. I needed to regain an edge over them.
Since I am unarmed, the logical thing to do is to arm myself with something. However, all the furniture here is too large and unwieldy. I could try to break off a leg of a chair but that would leave me open to attacks. The loudspeaker is not only too high for me to reach without jumping; it is also completely useless as a weapon.
The swordsman takes another redundant swipe at me. This is starting to get dull. I jump behind Jubstacheit’s desk. The candlestick telephone which was on it fell off and landed at my feet. Necessity is the mother of improvisation. Besides, any port is welcome during a storm. I picked up the communications device. Its stem was nearly ten inches long. It will have to do for now.
“Activate” I whispered, reinforcing the entire structure till it was as hard as steel.
The swordsman came with an overhead blow. I blocked his sword with the base of the telephone. And that is a selection of words that I never thought I would use in a sentence. The homunculus attacked me with his wires. He managed to wrap them around my throat. They started tightening.
I stopped trying to block the swordsman and jumped at the homunculus. He wasn’t expecting me to change tactics so quickly. I backhanded his face and then ran out of the room. I was aware that I couldn’t defeat them both with just a telephone set. However, I wasn’t supposed to defeat them to begin with.
The corridor was completely empty, fortunately and I ran unhindered towards the foyer. I’ve had enough of this madness. I didn’t like any of Lewis Carroll’s stories anyways and I most certainly do not enjoy being caught inside one. I gave John the opportunity to disable the Einzbern mana generator. I believe this is where our partnership ends. It was an incredibly one sided partnership, now that I think of it. But for some reason, I can’t bring myself to hate Constantine. I wonder why?
The door of the room I had just exited got blown off its hinges. The Scottish heretic swordsman barreled out of the room like a bull that had seen red. Now this is most inconvenient. How should I shake him off?
I turned into a side corridor and stopped. The entire corridor ahead of me had collapsed.
There was a madman with a sword coming after me from behind. I took one look behind me before jumping down. I landed on the corpse of some unfortunate homunculi. This is getting curiouser and curiouser. What exactly happened here?
“Kotomine?” Someone said my name. I looked up to see Constantine and Hisau Maiya walking towards me. There was another person with them. It looked like a child homunculus but everyone knew that homunculi are born as adult humans. I suddenly understood the entirety of Constantine’s plan.
“You never actually betrayed us. You were just waiting outside for the correct time.” I said, my words directed at Hisau Maiya.
“I was locating Miss Ilyasviel von Einzbern’s room from the outside. I needed you to cause enough a large diversion for me to look for her without risk of compromising myself.” The mercenary answered flatly.
“And you planted Westinghouse in here to release us.” I continued, this time looking at Constantine. “And to sell the idea of Westinghouse being a genuine alchemist, you somehow forced new memories into that black haired homunculi’s mind.”
“An American friend of mine owed me a favor and was in Blighty a few days ago.” Constantine said, oozing charm from every pore. “I don’t like planting false memories or creating identity crises, you see, but I decided to break a few of my own rules for once. Now are we just going to stand around admiring my brilliance or are we going to break out?”
“Just another question. It’s obvious that you planted Westinghouse in here under the false name of Avon Redrum to give me incentive to join your little scheme.” I asked. “Why did you do that?”
“To fight that off, of course!” Constantine said as he pointed behind me but I already knew what he was pointing at. Maiya produced a bible out of her satchel and tossed it to me. The two of them then turned and ran away, leaving me to deal with the incoming threat. I materialized three Black Keys out of it and threw them behind me. The swordsman didn’t even bother moving out of the way. By now, I suspect that he is just a silent raging mass of muscle; good for nothing except murdering everything in sight.
But this time, I have the advantage. Even if one can’t feel pain doesn’t mean that one can’t be damaged. The swordsman noticed that as well when he realized that he couldn’t move his elbow. My Black Keys had severed the tendon. Without a second thought, he switched to his left hand and resumed.
I simply threw three more Black Keys, this time aiming at his left elbow. I will bring this brute down one joint at a time.
The giant deflected all three Black Keys.
Good lord, he was sane! He had come too close by now. I followed Constantine’s suit and acted upon the thirty-sixth stratagem of war. I retreated strategically.
I was running around in the labyrinthine basement of the Einzbern Castle. I needed to get outside and hide in the nearest mundane town. I needed to find my way to stairs before I was turned into mincemeat.
A group of halberdiers, headed by the black haired homunculus, appeared in front of me. Not even bothering to address any of them, I ran on the walls and over them. Most of the halberdiers looked at me as if I was some circus acrobat. I can’t blame them. I don’t usually resort to such theatricality but this was the alternative to fighting my through them.
The swordsman beheaded three of them with one slash and broke through the rest of them. It was a real pity that the black haired homunculus still kept his head.
Still, the homunculi’s appearance gave me a hint at where the exit was. I followed my instincts and a few minutes later, I was standing in the foyer. The door seemed as if it had been broken apart by something large. The tire tracks on the formerly pristine carpets suggested that it was a truck. Trust a mercenary to be as crude and unsubtle as possible. I started running in earnest this time, following the track in the snow. It seemed as if they were headed towards the nearest town themselves.
The loud panting behind me told me that the swordsman was still pursuing me. I wasn’t in the mood to play with him anymore. I am quite certain that I could outrun him anyways.
And just as I felt as if my luck couldn’t go any lower, it just did. The truck was standing in the middle of the forest. Someone was under it, probably doing repairs. This was most unfortunate.
“MOVE!” Someone yelled and I immediately jumped out of the way. Hisau Maiya opened fire on the swordsman with a submachine gun. The brute leapt out of harm’s way. Although the blood on the snow suggested that he had been hit by a few bullets.
“Take Ilya and run!” Maiya said as she shoved a terrified looking girl into my arms.
“I beg your par-” I began to say in Japanese but stopped when the brute changed his direction. So he actually was after the girl? What was so special about her? Instead of mentally mulling over the problem, I started running once again. The girl barely weighed anything but she was still slowing me down slightly. I could no longer outpace the giant.
I kept running until I suddenly came at the edge of the cliff. If I hadn’t sensed the end by the sound of the wind, I would have fallen off into the abyss. The wind roared in delight at the freedom of the expanse, a freedom that I didn’t share. I could see cable cars some way off.
I took a few steps back.
“Are you going to?” the homunculus girl asked tentatively in German. This was the first time she had spoken at all.
“My mind is ash, my frame is dust/Turn my body to steel from rust” I intoned, applying Reinforcement on my entire body. Every muscle would be needed to exerted to the maximum if I wanted to pull this off.
“Mien Gott, you are!” the girl screamed and immediately started struggling. The swordsman was approaching. I didn’t have any time. I started running. The edge approached me.
I jumped.
For a moment, I felt nothing except the emptiness of the void. The girl was screaming incessantly like an air-raid siren gone mad. That is a good comparison; I should keep that in mind for future reference. I seemed to be floating forwards into the sky. It was a curiously pleasant feeling despite the fact that I was about twenty thousand feet above the ground and had made a leap of madness.
Then gravity restored its reign on me and we started to fall. The steel cable cars seemed to suddenly magnify. I could even see the back of some of the occupants, unaware of my existence just outside. And why would they look outside? Snow had reduced the visibility down to nothing. This was probably the last batch of tourists heading back down.
I smashed into the side of the car and quickly scrambled up to the roof before anyone could notice me. If I hadn’t reinforced my entire body, the girl and I would have reduced to paste. With any luck, the swordsman following us would have given up by now. The car itself had barely moved at all despite my collision. The tourists inside were still unaware.
Something flew towards us.
“Oh no.” The homunculus girl said quietly.
The swordsman crashed onto our car. And this time, the car did move. Violently.
“Run!” the girl screamed. I didn’t need further prompting. I started sprinting, using the steel cable on which the car was travelling as a tightrope. The swordsman was following us. I couldn’t see but I knew that he was following us. What fervor moved him to such feats of inhumanity? Not that I can point fingers.
“Look out!” The girl yelled. I was surprised that she could still see despite all the wind blowing. We had arrived at the station. I jumped off and landed on the platform.
The swordsman landed behind me and tried to decapitate me once again. This has gotten beyond tedious. I dodge his blade and run out of the station. The crowd looks at me strangely but then starts screaming when they notice the hulking madman in my pursuit. I need to go somewhere isolated where I can deal with this swordsman once and for all. I jump back into the wilderness, out of the eyes of the mundane.
“Wait here.” I told the homunculus girl in German before materializing eight Black Keys. I turned to face the charging heretic. I may not be armed with a sling and five stones but I feel quite confident in my victory. The heretic shall fall at my hand, not because of any tactical advantage but because he is a heretic.
I didn’t notice the sound until it was too late. For the heretic anyways. Hisau Maiya’s truck came from the left and smashed into the heretic swordsman. It ran him over with all the dignity of a ragdoll. I suddenly felt quite unwanted. Hisau Maiya got out of the truck, walked over to the prone body of the swordsman and shot him in the head with a pistol. Then just to be one the safe side, she shot him in the back.
That was decidedly anticlimactic.
“Oi, Kotomine! That was quite some stunt you pulled!” Constantine said as he climbed out of the truck. He walked over to the prone body of the swordsman, carrying what seemed like a canister of oil. He emptied its contents on the body and then set it on fire.
Now that was just cruel. Although it was necessary, I suppose.
“What? I’m just being cautious.” He said as he noticed me staring at him. Constantine came over to the little girl. For some reason she wasn’t shivering despite being bare feet and barely clothed in the snow.
“Ilya,” he said. “Your name is Ilya, isn’t it?” Ilya nodded her head. “I came here to rescue you.” He said.
“I know.” Ilya said in English, surprising me slightly. “Mama told me. I was waiting for you.”
“Is that so?” Constantine said. “That’s good. That’s very good.”
Ilya stuck her hand out as if offering a handshake. Constantine looked hesitant but he slowly held her small hand.
He immediately lit up like a chandelier. His circuits lit up with a strange golden light.
“What’s happening?” Constantine asked, his voice panicked.
“With this act, the contract between Irisviel von Einzbern and John Collier Constantine is complete.” Ilyasviel spoke with the voice of her mother. The two of them let go of each other. “You have been purified of the curse inside you, John Collier Constantine.” Ilyasviel said using her own voice this time.
“Curse?” Constantine said. “What bloody curse?”
Ilyasviel never got to answer his question. Silver wires impaled her from the behind and pulled her heart out. The organ was still palpitating outside its body. The little girl gave a small whimper before falling over. John Constantine and Hisau Maiya were still processing the shock in their minds.
I had already taken a Black Key out and thrown it at the assailant. My weapon hit the shoulder of the black haired homunculus but the damage had already been done. The heart was already outside too long. And I doubt the homunculus girl could survive the shock of such a grievous wound. The black haired homunculus lashed out with a fresh pair of wires. I moved out of the way.
They wrapped themselves around Hisau Maiya’s throat. Maiya dropped her handgun as she tried to pry the wires off. I threw four Black Keys at the homunculus. He quickly created a bird out of silver wire which blocked the Black Keys.
The was the sound of gunfire announced Hisau Maiya finally used one of her sleeve guns. The homunculi’s mouth burst into a fountain of blood and his right cheek hung open. He looked as if he was sporting a bloody grin on his face. Maiya fired her second sleeve gun. The bullet found the homunculi’s eye.
“Constantine!” Hisau Maiya choked as she struggled. Constantine was cradling the body of the dead girl. His eyes were completely hollow and his mind was probably blank. It was all up to me to dispose of this nuisance. I reinforced my body once again and leapt at the homunculus. He threw Hisau Maiya at me. I instinctively pushed her out of the way but I miscalculated my strength.
The limp and lifeless body of one Hisau Maiya landed on the still burning carcass of the heretic swordsman, her head missing.
Taking advantage of my divided attention, the black haired homunculus wrapped the silver wires around my head and smashed me into a nearby tree. My vision blurred and I stumbled backwards. I was dimly aware that my head had felled several trees. It turns out that reinforcement can only go so far. I decided to sit down and wait for my vision to return.
By the time I was able to see, the homunculus was long gone. There was no use in pursuing him anyways. I walked back to Constantine, who was still holding the girl’s body.
“Kotomine,” he asked in a whisper. “was it worth it?”
What should I say to him? Should I tell him a white lie? Or should I give him the bitter truth?
“Tell me it was worth it, Kotomine.” Constantine said. “Nick and Ilya and Maiya. Tell me it was worth it.”
It appears that he knows that his British friend is dead. At least that is something I don’t need to do now.
“I can’t say that, John, because that would be a lie.” I found myself saying before I could stop myself. No, I actually wanted to tell him this. “This was a fruitless endeavor.” I want to see him sink to the depths of despair. It’s the same feeling I had when I betrayed my father. It is this feeling of joy which I crave for so much. This forbidden ecstasy, this divine ambrosia, this sinful pleasure!
It makes me feel alive!
Why bother hide from the truth? I am an irredeemable person. I have murdered my father for joy and now I am breaking the spirit of someone who helped me in the past. All to feel an inkling of joy! This bliss, this euphoria! If this is sin then I ask why is it so? If this is the only way I can feel then I inquire to the reason! What is the reason of my existence if I can only feel joy through sin? What is my raison d’ être?
A gust of wind brought me back to my senses. The body of the swordsman was still burning. Constantine was still catatonic. It was, once again, up to me clean this mess. Not that it is beyond my capacity. I gently lift Constantine and place him in the back of the truck. There is a sack full of Einzbern gold in there as well. That would be the bounty Hisau Maiya earned when she turned us over to the Einzbern. This would be adequate payment, Constantine. I thank you for doing business with me. I went back and retrieved the body of Hisau Maiya as well. I couldn’t find her head so I gave up searching for it. The Einzbern can deal with the body of the swordsman. Lord knows why was he so persistent in chasing me down.
I sat on the driver’s seat of the truck. My father once had me learn how to drive a car because an Executor should be able to deal with any scenario. I think I was sixteen at that time. This is quite different from a car. But I can probably rely on my instinct and pilot this vehicle. Besides, I can learn through trial and error as well.
The day is over and the Einzbern affair has been concluded.
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The story is concluded but there is the epilogue remaining. I have yet to show who actually comes out on top of this entire mess.
I fashioned Kotomine's aria for Reinforcing the entire body from the first two lines of Radioactive by Imagine Dragons. Somehow, this aria suits him in my opinion. I couldn't find anything biblical enough that's why I resorted to this.
I thank you all for bearing with this non-Grail War story despite it's shitty premise. You guys are the best.