Create-A-Servant 2

[Skull]

Always nice to see some Ainu representation. <3

[34]

I know it's very petty of me to ask this, and I apologize if it come off as annoying, but I'll just ask this one last time.

Does anyone has any criticism/feedback/review or whatever for my Queen Shima sheet, please?

[Shiki-pon]

I know it's very petty of me to ask this, and I apologize if it come off as annoying, but I'll just ask this one last time.

Does anyone has any criticism/feedback/review or whatever for my Queen Shima sheet, please?

I was holding back on it due to feeling bad about saying your(?) sheet on Gajah Mada did not deal with a significant historical figure (turns out I was wrong about that). But since you're asking...
I don't think a local variation of a legend (referring to the Shima = aspect of Shiva based on an Indonesian belief) would afford enough power to give her Divinity A (or the other stuff stemming from that), though there's the rest of the justification to go with that. Having a full-on divinity lounging around during the 7th century just feels a bit weird to me, worship or not. I also feel that God's Resolution refers to the Christian God, so connection to Shiva wouldn't really heighten one's rank there.
The sheet doesn't really seem to hold much in the way of substance besides the Shiva bits, so I'm kinda left wondering where the actual Shima enters into the picture.

[Spartacus]

I don't really know the person since I mostly comment on figures that I know. But I'll try.

That's a lot of A Rank for figure that probably not very well known and unimpactful (I assume), especially compared to Wu which is very impactful to China as far as I know of.

Nowadays, I only care about how someone converts a legend into an NP more than the actual effects are, they are pretty okay in my book considering the Ruler class is pretty bonker.

[34]

That's a lot of A Rank for figure that probably not very well known and unimpactful (I assume), especially compared to Wu which is very impactful to China as far as I know of.

Well, the thing is, it's almost impossible to determine how impactful Indonesian kings or figures really were more than a few centuries ago because the lack of historical sources considering the region's environment that is prone to history-erasing catastrophe such as earthquake or tsunami and volcanoes and *cought*Islam*cough*. Much of the concrete evidence comes from a handful stone inscription and the temples they built that were lucky enough to survive these and be unearthed, and some wacky Chinese/Indian/Arabic records. That much I think, should tell how much of a Mystery that can be exploited there to explain stuff.

Regarding if Queen Shima was impactful or not, well, considering that stories such as one in my sheet is still being told of her, I think she was pretty impactful. Not to mention that she was actually the mother of two great dynasties of Java and Sumatra, and was probably an important figure in spreading the (now-long-gone) Shaivite religion in Java and Sumatra.

I was holding back on it due to feeling bad about saying your(?) sheet on Gajah Mada did not deal with a significant historical figure (turns out I was wrong about that). But since you're asking...

Huh, don't worry about that, Indonesian myth and legends are not as well known to anyone but Indonesian themselves (not that the current Muslim population of Indonesia appreciates their culture anymore), really. Part of the reason why I decided to make these sheets.

I don't think a local variation of a legend (referring to the Shima = aspect of Shiva based on an Indonesian belief) would afford enough power to give her Divinity A (or the other stuff stemming from that), though there's the rest of the justification to go with that. Having a full-on divinity lounging around during the 7th century just feels a bit weird to me, worship or not. I also feel that God's Resolution refers to the Christian God, so connection to Shiva wouldn't really heighten one's rank there.

I think you have a point about divinity in 7th century, but Batara Guru (if that's what you're referring) is not so much of a "local variation of a legend" than a "concept of a supreme god shared between various cultures in the archipelago".

Regarding God's Resolution there's nothing indicating that, and it's not because a connection to Shiva she got EX-rank, it's because of her Noble Phantasm.

The sheet doesn't really seem to hold much in the way of substance besides the Shiva bits, so I'm kinda left wondering where the actual Shima enters into the picture.

Really? Besides, perhaps Divinity and a few bits in her first Noble Phantasm, there's not much of Shiva in the sheet. Durga perhaps, but what really ties with Shiva is the fact that she was a hardcore Shaivite and that her husband was deified as Shiva.

But anyway, thank you

[Spartacus]

Well, the thing is, it's almost impossible to determine how impactful Indonesian kings or figures really were more than a few centuries ago because the lack of historical sources considering the region's environment that is prone to history-erasing catastrophe such as earthquake or tsunami and volcanoes and *cought*Islam*cough*. Much of the concrete evidence comes from a handful stone inscription and the temples they built that were lucky enough to survive these and be unearthed, and some wacky Chinese/Indian/Arabic records. That much I think, should tell how much of a Mystery that can be exploited there to explain stuff.

Regarding if Queen Shima was impactful or not, well, considering that stories such as one in my sheet is still being told of her, I think she was pretty impactful. Not to mention that she was actually the mother of two great dynasties of Java and Sumatra, and was probably an important figure in spreading the (now-long-gone) Shaivite religion in Java and Sumatra

Should mention this in your sheet imo, that actually make her sounds a great queen.

Also anyone playable in Civ, I count them as impactful and famaous.

[34]

Should mention this in your sheet imo, that actually make her sounds a great queen.

Already did, I think.

Shima was the daughter of Hyang Syailendra (Divine King of the Mountain), and the great-grandmother of King Sanjaya. The Syailendras (literally means King of the Mountains) was originally Shaivite, but at some point they "adopted" Mahayana Buddhism and has since been referred as the Syailendra dynasty, known for the construction of the Borobudur temple and became the ruler of the Buddhist Srivijaya Empire based on Sumatra. However, those who still embraced Shaivite religion became known as the Sanjaya dynasty and ruled Java and made the Dieng (Di Hyang, Shima's NP in the sheet) a sacred place. Technically both are still the descendant of Syailendra though, only different religion.

[Kabalisto Koga]

Sorry everyone i make a indianic servant for the contest does someone know a direct translator or a quite complete Dictionary of the North american indigenic languages if possible Cherokee or Navajo ?
i have searched but atleast for now i have not found a working one .

[Shiki-pon]

FC Link
Alternate Classes: Caster
True Name: Fenja & Menja
Alignment: True Neutral
Origin: Norse Mythology
Armament: Grindstone

Parameters:
STR: A+
END: A
AGI: D
MANA: B
LUCK: D
NP: C

Skills

Class Skills

Mad Enhancement - Rank E: The Class Skill that characterizes a Berserker, raising basic parameters and strengthens one's physical abilities in exchange of hindering mental capacities and/or in exchange for their sense of reason. In some cases, it also affects and/or seals away some techniques, Personal Skills and Noble Phantasms.
Normally does not receive the benefits of Mad Enhancement. In exchange, one retains a normal capacity to think.

Personal Skills

Jötunn-Kind - Rank C: A mixed Skill representing the Jötunn of Norse Mythology, as well as their myriad shapes and abilities. Due to there being many different types of Jötunn, the specific effects vary wildly between users. Common effects include Shapeshift, Galdr, Monstrous Strength, Nature of a Rebellious Spirit, Mana Burst and others. Mana Burst is usually restricted to Fire Jötunn, taking the form of Flames.
In Berserker’s case, the effects include Monstrous Strength and Nature of a Rebellious Spirit.

Alluring Nightingale - Rank C: A mesmerizing-kind of Skill possessed by those with a natural constitution of having a beautiful voice; it is also a declaration of the exercise of power by the royalty. It works as a fascination magecraft-like effect towards males, but evasion is possible with a Magic Resistance Skill. Even without Magic Resistance, one can abate it to some extent so long as they maintain a will to resist.
As they were held in slavery not only for their brute strength but also for their beautiful voices, charming men is an easy task.

Combination - Rank A: A Skill that displays how much one's combat power increases when on a united front with a specific person.
The sisters are fully capable of acting in concert without verbal communication between them, with even discussion being possible without words. When fighting alongside each other, the combat power of each sister is almost doubled.

Noble Phantasms

The Wondrous Millstone

Grótti

Magecraft, Rank A+

A Noble Phantasm manifesting as a millstone, though one far too large and heavy for mortals to make use of. It was originally their creation, though the sisters abandoned it shortly after its construction. Grótti is utterly stationary once it is summoned into existence and boasts great durability. The stones, heavy as they are, require a strength of at least A-rank to move.
Grótti’s usage is in the act of grinding the millstone. Rather than consuming magical energy after its manifestation in order to be activated, the millstone merely requires constant effort on Berserker’s part. The expended work done in grinding Grótti is then turned into energy, which can be used to achieve a multitude of things, the limit of which exists only in the users’ imagination. It can be used to create substances, transport objects and even conjure metaphysical effects such as happiness and luck. Naturally, in accordance with the nature of the work required, all of these processes are gradual rather than instant. Substances and objects are created little by little, natural movement is simply sped up and emotions and other effects build up over time.
While the sisters toil on Grótti, chains representing their past servitude bind them to the millstone. These chains restrict their mobility to the absolute minimum, except for movement related to grinding the millstone. Even after Berserker stops working, the chains will exist for a moment, taking almost a minute to dissipate completely.
Rather than acting as an eternal tool of creation, however, Grótti, wondrous as it is, has a limited durability, as it accumulates wear and heat as it is ground. If Berserker slaves away continuously, the mill will eventually break from the constant strain. The time period for which Grótti will function can be extended by allowing the Noble Phantasm to vanish until such a time as the millstone has cooled.

Description

Likes: Physical work, handsome men
Dislikes: Their wishes being ignored, ungratefulness
Talents: Brawling, stubbornness
Natural Enemy: Greedy kings

Berserker’s true identity is the sisters Fenja and Menja, the Enslaved Giantesses.

At first glance, the sisters seem very much alike, with a cold countenance and apathetic approach to their surroundings. Fenja and Menja keep mostly to themselves, not wishing to reveal their voices to others due to how they were sought after as slaves for their singing. They are helped in maintaining this masquerade by the Berserker class' usually handicapped mental abilities, though they themselves don't suffer from this disadvantage. As such, they are tend to refrain from verbal communication. However, they will speak openly when spoken to by someone who has earned their trust or respect. Of the two, Fenja is clearly the more aggressive, with Menja being more prone to melancholy and seeking to be alone with her sister.
As a testament to the giant blood that runs in their veins, both of them enjoy battle tremendously. While fighting, they often find themselves humming a wordless song to each other. Whether a fight is challenging or not matters little, as it is the bloodshed and opportunity to engage in physical labour while causing destruction that appeals to them. Though their way of fighting is brutish, Fenja and Menja do have a semblance of honor in that they will not attack those they do not see as combatants, and will try not to involve innocents in their brawls.
The sisters hate their Noble Phantasm vehemently, seeing it as a source of most of their woes. In order to keep themselves from being fully enslaved again, Fenja and Menja will do little to explain the workings of Grótti, even should the fact of their unimpaired sanity come to light.
In other Heroic Spirits, Fenja and Menja mostly pay attention to physical attributes and aptitude for combat. They respect those who can give them a good fight and look down on those who would avoid direct confrontation. Both have something of a weakness for handsome men, though their preferences differ, with Fenja preferring those of more rugged features and Menja liking those of conventional beauty.
Neither of the sisters is particularly pleased with the idea of serving a Master. If their Master allows them to cut loose in combat, Fenja and Menja may even grow to like them. However, if their Master forces them to slave away at grinding Grótti for their benefit without rest or respite, the sisters will turn against their Master. Their favoured method is to use Grótti’s power to draw enemies towards their Master in the hope that the sisters will either get to fight or their Master will die facing enemies.
Fenja and Menja are very interested in the Holy Grail, and are thus strongly motivated to do well in a Holy Grail War. Their wish is unorthodox, as they wish for admittance to Valhalla, where they can drink and fight forever.

Lore

Fenja and Menja’s story is told in the Gróttasöngr and recounted in several pieces of folklore.
Gróttasöngr is the work song of two young slave girls bought in Sweden by the Danish King Frodi. The girls are brought to a magic grindstone to grind out wealth for the king and sing for his household.
The girls ask for rest from the grinding but are commanded to continue. Undaunted in their benevolence, the girls proceed to grind and sing, wishing wealth and happiness for the King. The King, however, is still not pleased and continues to order the girls to grind without interruption.
King Frodi is ignorant of their lineage and the girls reveal that they are descended from mountain giants. The girls recount their past deeds, including moving a flat-topped mountain and revealing that they had actually created the grinding stone they are now chained to. They tell him that they had advanced against an army in Sweden and fought "bearlike warriors",had "broken shields", supported troops, and overthrown one prince while supporting another. They recount that they had become well known warriors.
The girls then reflect that they have now become cold and dirty slaves, relentlessly worked, and living a life of dull grinding. The girls sing that they are tired, and call to King Frodi to wake up so that he may hear them. They announce that an army is approaching, that Frodi will lose the wealth they've ground for him, that he will also lose the magic grindstone, and that the army will burn the settlement and overthrow Frodi's throne in Lejre. They are grinding this army into existence via the magic stone. They then comment that they are "not yet warmed by the blood of slaughtered men"
The girls continue to grind even harder and the shafts of the mill-frame snap. They then sing a prophecy of vengeance mentioning Hrólfr Kraki, Yrsa, Fróði and Halfdan. The army they produced host was led by a sea-king named Mysing. Mysing attacked Fróði during the night, killed him, and left with rich booty. This was the end of the Fróði peace.
Mysing took Grótti as well as Fenja and Menja and asked them to grind salt. At midnight, they asked Mysing if he did not have salt enough, but he asked them to grind more. Deciding that their hoped-for saviour from Frodi's clutches had betrayed them, they resolved themselves. As the sisters ground on, a giant whirlpool was formed as the sea started rushing through the center of the mill stone. Then the sea begun turning salt. Now filled with a great rage, the girls grind even harder until finally the grinding mechanism collapsed and the magical stone split in two, shattering the ship carrying it.
Fenja and Menja decided they would rather drown than be pressed once again into slavery. Their rage sent the feet and their wondrous stone to the bottom of the sea, carrying themselves and their enemies along with them.

[Anju Addams]

True Name: Fenja & Menja

Always nice to see more obscure Norse Mythology Sheets. A very 'cool' Sheet, although those names give me Worm flashbacks.

How long would constant usage take to wind down the Noble Phantasm by the way?

[Shiki-pon]

Always nice to see more obscure Norse Mythology Sheets. A very 'cool' Sheet, although those names give me Worm flashbacks.

How long would constant usage take to wind down the Noble Phantasm by the way?

A few days of constant usage would get the mill close to its breaking point, depending on how fed up the grinders are with the job.

[Kabalisto Koga]

Hm interesting i have during my research for Loki not seen them somewhere .
A truly inorthodox Berserker my compliment ,my friend !

Please correct me : Their Noblephantasm works after summoning upon they are beginning to move the grindstone are appearing chains who bind both,then are they able to create either materials ,perform teleportation or conduct Magecraft ,right?

Would they are also be able to summon and then dispell the stone as shield? And if destroyed is the stone lost or can he be resummoned after a time period ?

Two question in which appearance /height are they summoned as Servants and have you get a litle derivation of their jotun kind skill from my child of giant skillof Loki ?And about(my) Loki what would be their reaction if they meet him as other servant ?

[Shiki-pon]

Hm interesting i have during my research for Loki not seen them somewhere .
A truly inorthodox Berserker my compliment ,my friend !

Please correct me : Their Noblephantasm works after summoning upon they are beginning to move the grindstone are appearing chains who bind both,then are they able to create either materials ,perform teleportation or conduct Magecraft ,right?

Would they are also be able to summon and then dispell the stone as shield? And if destroyed is the stone lost or can he be resummoned after a time period ?

Two question in which appearance /height are they summoned as Servants and have you get a litle derivation of their jotun kind skill from my child of giant skillof Loki ?And about(my) Loki what would be their reaction if they meet him as other servant ?

Once they start grinding, they're bound to the millstone and can start producing whatever they like, yes.
They can summon Grótti as a shield. If it's broken, it stays broken.
In terms of height, they'd be among the taller Servants, so >260 cm tall.
And no, Jötunn-kind isn't derived from the Skill that I criticized on your sheet (due to its godawful name). It's the exact same Skill as on my Utgard-Loki from June. And as for their reaction to Loki... I don't know why they'd care, honestly. The man was never particularly well-liked in any of the company he kept, and two random part-giantesses have probably never heard of Loki (other than the name, I guess).

[SleepMode]

A little question to throw out there:

When Servant-crafting, is there a specific country/region's history/mythos you always liked?

For me, to start, it would definitely be Chinese history.

[Skull]

Obviously creator's provincialism plays a part in why I like to write about British heroes and villains.

China's also an old favourite since I grew up on and till this day still love martial arts movies.

[King of Padoru]

For me, it'd be Japanese cuture. That said, I'd want to see some more Spanish Servants too.

[Shiki-pon]

Norse mythology is a classic as far as I'm concerned, but I do have a not-insignificant number of British sheets. I try to avoid consciously focusing on any single region, though.

[Kabalisto Koga]

just a spontan idea for some fun: weapon swapped Servants if anyone might give it a try ?

[Kabalisto Koga]

A little question to throw out there:

When Servant-crafting, is there a specific country/region's history/mythos you always liked?

For me, to start, it would definitely be Chinese history.

Egypt because i liked it since my Childhood ,through my researches for my servants have i though found a liking in the Indian and norse mythology,also would i like to make some cryptid based servants but there to find the Right candidates is a heavy Task.

one Question at al here has somebody made beside padoruous Fakers some aberative Servants like the Canon Caster Gilles or a totall Distortion like strange fakes Pale Rider ?

[Lambda-Nu]

A little question to throw out there:

When Servant-crafting, is there a specific country/region's history/mythos you always liked?

For me, to start, it would definitely be Chinese history.

Not really sure because I'm just trying to do what hasn't been done before. Plus, my stuff is just all over the place when it comes to region.