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Thread: Create-A-Servant 2

  1. #4481
    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six Bird of Hermes's Avatar
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    The mention of my old Orochimaru sheet have given me a few ideas actually...

    I was doing a multiple head deal with Yamata no Orochi the same way that Tamamo had multiple tails. I did the main head and Orochimaru assimilating the "Head of Greed". I've been wanting to expand on the idea further but the things I've come up with since have been too similar to the likes of Tamamo Cat and MHX for my liking. I've one idea that I feel a strong 'Maybe' about but out of interest does anyone else have other ideas regarding Orochi?

  2. #4482
    Totally not Eldritch WhatShouldNotBe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LJ3 View Post
    Depending on how strong your knowledge of music theory is, you can come up with some unique magic babble to showcase his contributions.

    I remember he was an extremely devout Christian so there's that angle too.
    Executor!Bach when?

  3. #4483
    吸血鬼 Vampire Hakuro's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bird of Hermes View Post
    The mention of my old Orochimaru sheet have given me a few ideas actually...

    I was doing a multiple head deal with Yamata no Orochi the same way that Tamamo had multiple tails. I did the main head and Orochimaru assimilating the "Head of Greed". I've been wanting to expand on the idea further but the things I've come up with since have been too similar to the likes of Tamamo Cat and MHX for my liking. I've one idea that I feel a strong 'Maybe' about but out of interest does anyone else have other ideas regarding Orochi?
    But this idea would be doing multiple Orochimarus, or each Orochi's head being a different historical/legendary figure that have Orochi's heritage?

    It would be nice more Japanese Servants with snake motif being different heads...

  4. #4484
    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six Bird of Hermes's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hakuro View Post
    But this idea would be doing multiple Orochimarus, or each Orochi's head being a different historical/legendary figure that have Orochi's heritage?

    It would be nice more Japanese Servants with snake motif being different heads...
    The latter would be preferable so I could make Japanese Servants with snake motifs and then handwave the connection to Orochi. I would rather do that than multiple Orochi's etc but I would definitely do that though if push came to shove.

  5. #4485
    So Many Ideas, So Little Time SleepMode's Avatar
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    I'm currently having a few problems making a Caster Zenobia mentioned a few pages ago. Since many of you guys have a lot of good suggestions, can any of you guys think of a few to lend a hand?

  6. #4486
    It's All Good! 4score7years's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zh1212 View Post
    I'm currently having a few problems making a Caster Zenobia mentioned a few pages ago. Since many of you guys have a lot of good suggestions, can any of you guys think of a few to lend a hand?
    Maybe. What's giving you trouble?

    Just generally a little stumped idea-wise? Or is it something in particular?

  7. #4487
    So Many Ideas, So Little Time SleepMode's Avatar
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    I'm currently stuck on her "build," as well as her NP.

    Since she's an older and more mysterious figure in history, she's going to be an above-average Servant.
    Since I gave her decent rankings in both Strength and Mana (both B's) due to her being a warrior queen; but I don't know what to put in the other Parameters without making her too overpowered.

    As for an NP, I'm thinking of a Support category, but don't know how it should be specified; multi-targeted NP that increas morale and advantage against an more superior Servant, or something else...?
    (Trying to avoid an Anti-Army NP)

  8. #4488
    死徒 Dead Apostle zikari8's Avatar
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    I think her Parameters should naturally be based on her own abilities in legend, with fame taken into account afterwards. So if she is really fast, having a high Agility is not unreasonable even if it might make her a tad more powerful.

    As for the NP classification, if you don't want to put it as Anti-Army while making it effective against a number of people, perhaps Anti-Formation/Anti-Team would be good?

  9. #4489
    So Many Ideas, So Little Time SleepMode's Avatar
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    This was very helpful, thanks for the advice!

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    死徒 Dead Apostle zikari8's Avatar
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    Well, I wanted to get this out for Valentine's but I failed. For the momentous occasion, I wanted to go the extra mile and channel the inner powers of love and idolatry and have a servant who exudes loveliness. I should do a swimsuit version next...


    True Name: Mata Hari Alter
    Height/Weight: 165cm ・ 49kg
    Series: Fate/Grand Order
    Source: Historical Fact
    Country of Origin: France-Germany
    Alignment: Chaotic Evil
    Gender: Female

    Parameters:
    STR: E
    END: E
    AGI: E
    LCK: E
    MGI: A
    NP: A++


    Class Skills:
    Presence Concealment -- :
    The capacity to hide one's presence as a Servant. The skill, however, has been lost due to the “Vivid Flower” skill.

    Personal Skills:
    Vivid Flower A+:
    A skill that ends up determining how much one ends up gathering public attention. At this rank, one will unconsciously draw gazes to oneself simply by being within sight, and all who do lay their eyes on the user will find it difficult to turn away. Their attention leaves them distracted by every one of the user’s movements and features. Others are also more likely to listen to the user’s words. Truly, it is a skill that places the user in the eyes of all, men and women.

    … with this, can we really still call her an Assassin though?

    Pheromone A:
    Pheromone is the general term for substances secreted/emitted from inside an animal's body, and that has an effect on the conduct and physiologic state of a different specimen of the same race.

    Simply being within proximity of Assassin makes one lower their guard and be more susceptible to seduction. Even without being a beautiful courtesan, Assassin can completely dissolve the wariness of men and women alike, so long as she makes no mistake in the approach of the conversation.

    Double Cross C:
    The ability to betray one’s allies. At this rank, people and Servants alike are less likely to suspect being betrayed.

    The rank is lowered from its full potential due to Assassin’s lack of stealth.

    Princess of Loveliness A:
    A Skill representing one's charismatic nature in regards not to leadership, but the ability to charm the people around oneself.

    By means of a composite effect with the Vivid Flower skill, Assassins naturally draws individuals to worship and protect her simply by existing.


    Noble Phantasm
    Mother of God
    Mata Hari
    :
    Rank: A++
    Type: Anti-Army
    The evolution of
    The Girl with Sunny Eyes
    Mata Hari.


    The materialization of the legend of Mata Hari, Assassin’s body itself becomes a Noble Phantasm. By means of a bewitching dance, it forcibly numbs trains of thoughts. Civilians and Masters are a matter of course, but this applies also to Servants who do not have mental resistance Skills or who are not under Mad Enhancement ranked C or above. Those who fail at their checks become, fundamentally, Assassin’s puppets.

    The effects do not wear off with time. Once one has fallen victim to the Noble Phantasm, they remain Assassin’s puppets until she either frees them willingly or is defeated. Such is the natural change in Assassin’s mindset. The vision of her dance does not fade with the rise of the sun. Rather than a temporal love over a night of wonder, its effects represent an everlasting lust that stretches to death.

    Perhaps it is a fitting ability for a girl who could never hold a lasting relationship. Drowned in the torrents of pleasure, both her and her puppets no longer need to wake from their hollow dreams.

    Lore
    Nothing has changed. Mata Hari was a woman spy whose legs continued to bewitch military officers until the day she was executed. She was a girl who wasted all of her youth to the selfish desires of men and continued to play with them till the end of her days.

    But now having been violated by the curses of the grail, she has emerged a new woman. Having come to a realization of the hopeless, sinful nature of men, this is the side of the Girl with Sunny Eyes that persists in her hatred of men. Although in life, Mata Hari never succumbed to the sorrows she encountered in life, doubtless she had at times felt a hatred towards the men who wronged her. These feelings have simply been brought to the front by means of a curse, causing her goals and methods to reverse.

    Where once her seduction and manipulation of men were but methods for her to obtain happiness, they have now become her goal. Her hatred has become an active vendetta against all men and her goal is to make every single one her puppet. Only once she has all of them under her thumb can her hatred be quenched.

    Personality
    In the end, this is but another side of the girl who calls herself Mata Hari. At the core, her personality remains the same, only that certain traits have become stronger.

    Her already sneaky ways have evolved to full on manipulation. A fully wicked woman, she puts on a façade of a sweet, innocent girl while truthfully enjoying having others be charmed by her. She spouts soft lies without hesitation and makes empty promises of love and affection. Naturally, she is distrustful of people in general, men in particular. The only safe man is one who’s completely under her control. Anyone else is a potential threat, at best. Her relationship with her master would quickly end once she becomes corrupted. If she does not immediately turn him or her into her first puppet, she would doubtless cut ties and fight them were they to oppose her.

    There is, by the way, a large difference in the actions and methods of this Mata Hari and the other one. While one uses her abilities to get information from others and stealthily approach her enemies for the kill, the other is much more direct in her approach. Unlike her counterpart, Mata Hari Alter does not stop at making herself seem unhostile but actively charms all around her through the use of provocative clothing, motions, and words. She amasses a fine army of puppets using her Noble Phantasm and then has her soldiers gather information or fight for her. All the while, she continues to pretend to be innocent while her ever-increasing army does all the work. She’s especially keen on using her Noble Phantasm to add stronger Servants to her team, since there are inevitably some who will be immune to her powers.

    Regarding women, she does not hold the hatred she has for men. If anything, she feels sympathetic with them, feeling that they are all victims to society. But of course, if one were to get in her way, she would crush them in the end.

    But in the end, this personality is but an exaggeration of certain feelings. It does not account for the whole of Mata Hari’s being and wishes. So… if in the end, she were to win and achieve the revenge that she long awaited, no happiness will be awaiting her. Surrounded by her mindless puppets, the girl would sit alone on her throne and look back at everything she had accomplished.

    Then, in the end, for her to be truly saved would mean for her to overcome the curse, or in other words, kill off this self. To do that… surely it could only be possible, without a doubt, through the power of true love, right? Ah, but is there someone like that to save the day… perhaps there was. No, there surely must be.

    Extra
    Male Servants: Smiles “Would it be okay if I depend on you a little?”
    Diarmuid: “I’m not sure why but I feel like I must get rid of this one especially.”
    Medb: “Ara, well isn’t this a quaint meeting? Shall we work together?”
    Master: “Thank you, you have outlived your usefulness. You may go now.”

    Bond CE – From Java, my Love:

    An expensive box of chocolate. An ornate heart shape.

    "There are a lot of things that I want, but I want your love more than anything else. Won't you give it to me?"

  11. #4491
    The showtime RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Servant Avenger:

    True Name: Abel 'The First Martyr'

    Alignment: Chaotic Evil

    Alternate Classes: Caster, Ruler

    Strength- D
    Agility- C
    Endurance- A
    Mana- A+
    Luck- E
    NP- B++

    Equipment: A simple wooden shepherd's crook carved from the wood of an ancient tree in the earliest days of creation. For use in animal sacrifices, Avenger also carries an ornately curved ritual dagger. Seeing as its unusual shape is impractical for close combat, she mainly utilizes it to cut herself open to activate her first Noble Phantasm.

    Appearance
    :

    Source is here

    For her original appearance, see this

    Personality: A cheerful and radiant girl with unshakable faith in God. Or so she appears anyway. In truth, the trauma from being slain by the hand of her beloved brother has twisted Avenger's formerly innocent personality severely. She regards love and hatred to be indistinguishable concepts and views violence and murder to be the purest possible expression of sibling love.

    She is infatuated with Cain, her killer, and babbles about him obsessively, alternating between a desire to meet him again and forgive him with wanting to chop him up into little bits to make up for what he did to her. Even while displaying bloodlust Avenger maintains her innocent manner, wide-eyed and smiling sweetly, showing the face of a young girl who could commit massacre without any cruelty.

    Her wish on the Holy Grail is the complete genocide and extinction of the human race, who she views only as the vile progeny of her murderer. Only by fully purging her brother's seed from the earth will her drive for vengeance be finally satiated.

    Likes: her brother, God, pastoral scenery
    Dislikes: her brother, hurtful things, death
    Talent: shepherding
    Natural Enemy: Onee-chan♥


    Class Skills:

    Avenger- A
    A Skill expressing one's nature as a being who piles up the grudges and hatreds of others on themselves. Avenger's ranking in Strength rises in proportion to the damage inflicted against her and all allies over the course of battle. As history's first martyr who presides over all others, Avenger naturally bears the combined grudge and righteous fury of all innocent souls murdered, granting a truly great ranking in this Skill.

    Their voices constantly ring out in Avenger's ears, imploring her for revenge against their killers. An unending lament of suffering and despair from which there is no reprieve. With a macabre soundtrack like that playing in the background, no wonder she ended up such an edgelord.

    Oblivion Correction- A
    Nature of one who forever holds onto a grudge, even as others forget. This single-minded determination born from darkness greatly increases the damage dealt by critical strikes in battle. Even when Avenger was killed and her blood soaked into the earth, she continued to cry out to the heavens tirelessly until her murderer was aptly punished.

    Self-Replenishment (Mana)- A+
    Ability to replenish one's own supply of magical energy (Mana).

    The inversion of the curse placed upon her kinslaying brother, Avenger is blessed with a constant supply of Mana gushing forth from the earth wherever she travels. As such, she can utilize Noble Phantasms of advanced magical energy consumption without worry, and sustain herself even in the total absence of a Master.

    However even so, due to a certain other Skill of Avenger's she must still rely on sucking blood in order to keep her body in operative order.


    Personal Skills:

    Soul Of A Martyr- EX
    Ability to negate mental interference through firmness of faith.

    Being the first human to ever be unjustly killed for their faith, Avenger displays the highest possible value for this Skill. At this rank, all mental interference is blocked out 100% and furthermore, it also has the effects of not yielding to pain and suffering, granting an effect similar to Battle Continuation at a low rank.

    Predisposition To Suffering- A+
    Connotes a tendency to bring out the aggressive intentions of others. This Skill increases the chance of Avenger being targeted during group battles. While it appears to be a disadvantageous Skill, for a Servant that possesses high defensive qualities it allows one to function as an excellent escort.

    Flawless, godly and beautiful in every respect, those around Avenger without a strong mental fortitude can't help but begin to loathe and envy her. The longer one lingers in Avenger's presence, the more those feelings of resentment escalate to the point of outright murderous and similarly foul intentions.

    A Skill that manifests regardless of Avenger's volition, it is more accurately classified as a kind of curse. However, Avenger in her current twisted state rejoices in it as a blessing, deeming violence to be the purest expression of love.

    Natural Body- A
    Possession of a flawless human body from birth. Grants a permanent rank-up to one's Strength stat. Moreover, the body retains its basic shape regardless of calories ingested.

    Similar to her brother, Avenger was born as one of the first human beings descended directly from the original Adam and Eve and as such is endowed with an "immaculate constitution" superior to present day humanity in every way.

    While her brother's perfection of form was stripped from him as punishment for his most horrid act of murder, Avenger's ranking in this Skill remains undiminished.

    Proof Of Demise- EX
    The proof and conceptual burden of embodying the reality of death, through being the first human to succumb to its foul grasp. As the means by which death first encroached upon a previously
    Garden Of Eden
    idyllic and unsullied world
    , Avenger possesses this Skill as a kind of curse.
    Even while alive, Avenger's form still "embodies death", showing vampiric attributes and an
    Curse Of Restoration
    advanced healing ability
    similar to that of Dead Apostles. Furthermore, she must also rely upon sucking blood to nourish herself, while her formerly peachy skin takes on a pale corpuscular pallor.

    It may come off as something out of needlessly edgy fiction, but it seems that one of the first humans in history is in fact something akin to a vampire.


    Noble Phantasms:


    Dam Shel N'kamah- Spilt Blood, Cry Aloud My Vengeance (B++, Anti-Unit/Anti-Nature): After her death, Avenger's blood spilled out into the earth and cursed it, insuring that the land would never again yield or grow crops to the man who slew her. That very lifeblood is her primary Noble Phantasm, continuing to blaze with the red-hot fury of Avenger's grudge even as it once more flows within her veins. Avenger can manipulate her spilt blood and shape it into any form imaginable, from lashing whip-like tendrils, scything blades or tsunami-like waves of gore.

    Regardless of the form it takes, any construct created from Avenger's blood bears an incredibly potent Anti-Human/Anti-Life attribute, sublimating both the curse her blood inflicted upon the earth as well as her hatred for the lineage of Cain. Essentially, her blood plunders magical energy from whatever living matter it touches. Simply letting it soak into the earth would turn a bountiful field into a desolate and barren wasteland in a matter of mere minutes. This also applies to Avenger's opponents, strikes with her blood weaponry not only wounding the enemy's body but sapping their life-force with each successive blow.

    Against those with a legend of "murder", defined as unjust killing of a human being, this Noble Phantasm showcases even greater effects. Contact with her blood forces the target to perceive firsthand flashes of the agony and despair from those they murdered, effectively reenacting such deeds with themselves in the role of the victim.
    A truly effective curse against those such as a certain
    Vlad III
    Romanian count
    or
    Elizabeth Bathory
    draconic princess
    who amassed a blood-soaked reputation of mass slaughter, who are all but certain to be driven mad by the mental strain of feeling the combined pain and suffering from hundreds or even thousands of souls.

    While it is only usable regarding her blood that has already been spilled, that weakness is a trifling concern for Avenger who holds no qualms with slicing open her own body to actualize its effects should enemy attacks not be forthcoming.


    Arar Shel Ra'ab- Rejection From The Earth (A, Anti-Unit): As punishment for killing his sister Abel, the earth itself balked at Cain. Crops would not grow for him, and the ground refused to yield before his labor. As such, this Noble Phantasm conveys the concept that to attack Avenger is to be rejected by the World itself. With each strike a Servant deals on Avenger, the pressure exerted by Gaea upon them is slightly increased. Over a prolonged battle, enemy Servants will find themselves nearly crushed by pressure from the World, demanding an inordinate amount of Mana simply to keep from dissipating altogether.

    Unless they possess truly outrageous reserves of magical power or some other way to supply themselves, most Servants will find it nearly impossible to sustain themselves after critically wounding Avenger. One to actually slay her outright will almost certainly fade from existence in the aftermath.

    However, as it incarnates a divine punishment, the pressure imposed by this Noble Phantasm declines proportionately with the assailant's Divinity ranking.

    If summoned as Caster or Ruler Lily she'd have...
    Kazab Eden- Ephemeral Undying Paradise (EX, Reality Marble): A Noble Phantasm born from the
    Lily
    lighter
    side of Abel before her death and subsequent vengeance. An inner world resembling a serene and verdant meadow under a cloudless azure sky, a conceptual paradise reflecting the state of the world before the arrival of death.

    Since mankind was already exiled from the Garden of Eden, this is a mere imperfect reflection of the true paradise, an illusion of tranquility destined to crumble apart at the slightest conflict. But nonetheless, it is still something Abel treasures close to her heart as a reminder of the peaceful days she loved so long ago.

    Within this idyllic realm, the concepts of injury and death cease to apply and all damage inflicted within its reaches will rapidly heal over, as if the World itself were denying their existence. Furthermore, the sense of soothing tranquility suffusing the air also eases mental burdens and suppresses hostile intent.

    A pacifist-type Noble Phantasm with absolutely no combat applications, born out of Abel's wish for a world where nobody has to kill or be killed. However, even with her great supply of Mana she can only maintain this illusory world for a brief time, before it is inevitably crushed by the reality of creation after the Fall.


    Key Words/Craft Essences


    Inversion
    First Murder

    "Red. It was all red.

    The crimson blood soaked into my dress and face, dripping from the dagger clutched tightly in my brother's hand, the same one I'd used to sacrifice animals.
    B-big brother... it hurts so much, how could you do this to me?
    But if brother loves me, then... that's right. Even this act must be because of
    hate
    love
    too. This agony blossoming in my chest is surely that of '
    hate
    love
    '.

    In that case, I
    hate
    love
    you too big brother...!!

    When we meet again someday, I'll be sure to show you how much I've learned about this new brand of love you've taught me! I'll hurt you, tear you limb from limb, gouge out your innards and make you suffer lots and lots, and then we'll be able to love each other even more!

    Isn't that right, my dearest big brother...?"


    Lament Of Innocence Lost

    "Do you still remember, big brother?

    Back when we lay under the sky together, just the two of us, with nothing but the gentle grass against our backs and the fields extending off as if to embrace the far horizon.
    Counting the clouds, laughing and joking over all kinds of frivolous things...

    Right now, those innocent days seem so faded and distant.
    If I'd known that the time we shared was an illusion that could break apart any second, I would've clutched those fleeting moments tightly to my chest and never let go.

    Hah... it's so sad, big brother. I can't even remember what the color of that sky was, anymore."
    Last edited by RoydGolden; January 27th, 2018 at 06:17 PM. Reason: Finally changed Alignment as Per Hermes' advice

  12. #4492
    Dead Apostle Eater Historia's Avatar
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    key words/craft essences are so chuuni

    - - - Updated - - -

    pls stahp

  13. #4493
    The showtime RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gally View Post
    key words/craft essences are so chuuni

    - - - Updated - - -

    pls stahp
    Wow, that's a fast comment. Did you read it already?

    But yeah, pretty much the whole point of this sheet was to come up with something as outrageously edgy/chuuni as possible. And given the already existing take on Dantes, I don't think there's really such a thing as "too much" anymore.

    - - - Updated - - -

    I mean, I literally went with Abel as the world's first yandere onee-chan vampire. I clearly was not excessively worried about going over the top...

  14. #4494
    It's All Good! 4score7years's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RoydGolden View Post
    Edgelady Abel
    It's...hmmm. Well, it's pretty creative, and I'm once again impressed with the amount of stuff you managed to come up with from the legend. The Second NP was particularly unique, but it's all pretty detailed and distinctive on the whole. As for the sheet itself, and perhaps more to the point, the concept behind it...well, it's weird. Really weird. I think the obscene edginess is a little too much for me, and I also don't really see why you decided to genderbend him/her beyond Yandere memes, but I won't deny that the actual content of the sheet itself (outside of that) is quite good.
    Last edited by 4score7years; February 15th, 2017 at 09:09 PM.

  15. #4495
    The showtime RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 4score7years View Post
    It's...hmmm. Well, it's pretty creative, and I'm once again impressed with the amount of stuff you managed to come up with from the legend. The Second NP was particularly unique, but it's all pretty detailed and distinctive on the whole. As for the sheet itself, and perhaps more to the point, the concept behind it...well, it's weird. Really weird. I think the obscene edginess is a little too much for me, and I also don't really see why you decided to genderbend him/her beyond Yandere memes, but I won't deny that the actual content of the sheet itself (outside of that) is quite good.
    I admit the concept is pretty bonkers (though I vaguely recall hearing of a few other stories where Abel was a vampire, for some reason...). Basically I just cut loose and went as crazy as possible this time around. As you said, I basically made Abel a chick for more yandere potential (and because I was heavily inspired by Blazblue's Nu-13).

    Also, I hate to bring this up, but with characters like Thomas Edison: lion-headed superhero, it's increasingly difficult to say what ideas are really too out-there to be canon anymore...

    - - - Updated - - -

    If Adlet's still around, then I'm kind of curious what he thinks of this, since he's been on a Biblical Servant binge lately and also wrote up a ton of edgy/chuuni Servants in the past...

  16. #4496
    So Many Ideas, So Little Time SleepMode's Avatar
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    ... Is it wrong for me to feel bad for Cain for having a sister this insane? I mean her NP was designed to wreck Heroic Spirits with really murderous backgrounds.

  17. #4497
    The showtime RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zh1212 View Post
    ... Is it wrong for me to feel bad for Cain for having a sister this insane? I mean her NP was designed to wreck Heroic Spirits with really murderous backgrounds.
    You can feel bad for Cain, particularly since my take on him was more overtly sympathetic (feels really guilty for what he did to his "sister" and his Alignment is even Chaotic Good). Speaking of which, I'm thinking I might remake my old Cain sheet sometime, now that I've already done an Abel up to my present standards...

    - - - Updated - - -

    And you're right that her NP really would wreck him, since, while he hasn't murdered the sheer quantity of people as, say, Bathory, the one he did commit he feels incredibly guilty for. So, having the memories of it flash before his eyes from Abel's point-of-view would really put him through one Hell of an emotional wringer...

  18. #4498
    So Many Ideas, So Little Time SleepMode's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RoydGolden View Post
    You can feel bad for Cain, particularly since my take on him was more overtly sympathetic (feels really guilty for what he did to his "sister" and his Alignment is even Chaotic Good). Speaking of which, I'm thinking I might remake my old Cain sheet sometime, now that I've already done an Abel up to my present standards...
    One thing of note when I looked over your profile for Cain, the man was also the First Farmer, not a shepard, so change the Talent when you're editing it.
    (maybe also add a Personal Skill related to farming would be a nice touch...)

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    The showtime RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zh1212 View Post
    One thing of note when I looked over your profile for Cain, the man was also the First Farmer, not a shepard, so change the Talent when you're editing it.
    (maybe also add a Personal Skill related to farming would be a nice touch...)
    Yeah, I remember that I got that mixed up when first writing the sheet (which was ages ago). In a previous version pre-edit I even gave him the Riding Skill on the same errant basis.

    With the latest Abel sheet, I more properly listed her Talent as the shepherding one, not her brother's.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Mostly though I'd probably be adding some new Skills, both original and ones that have debuted from canon (some variant of Archimedes' Aptitude For Slaughter would fit him perfectly), fleshing everything out a bit more to match my modern standards and probably changing his first NP to be a little more hax. (Which, being the First Murderer, he really should be)

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    So Many Ideas, So Little Time SleepMode's Avatar
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    Maybe the NP can be a One hit KO, but with a charge-up so obvious other Servants know they need to avoid it at all costs...
    (Merely a silly idea)

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