The Unsavable One. The Greatest Betrayer. In life, he was known for enacting the plot that led to the crucifixion to Jesus, he who was prophesied during the Last Supper to betray Jesus. Many theories were offered as to why Judas betrayed the one he followed for years, with the prominent ones being greed, Jesus ordering Judas to do so, or even the devil possessing him.
They could not have been more wrong.
While the act of betrayal and the death of Jesus was a Quantum Time-Locked event of PHH, Judas did the deed out of his own accord, though not out of greed for riches. He knew that his purpose in the world was to kill the Savior, but curiously enough, he did not rebel against his fate, even after he developed genuine bonds with his companions and acknowledged Jesus as his Savior.
Truly, he was an inhuman monster.
As the person who “was fated by God to kill Jesus,” there was no need for him to have a personality. He was created by God himself for this very purpose, and saw no need to give him the proper emotions of humanity. However, this does not mean he has no emotions. He simply could not tell the difference between emotions. Happiness, sadness, pain, love, fear; to him, they all feel the same. They are simply feelings for him. Even when he felt anything, they were nothing of note, nothing intense enough to give meaning to anything he did.
That’s why he was only a mere tax collector before Jesus met him, as he saw no reason to pursue other endeavors beyond making money to meet his bodily needs. However, when he met Jesus, he saw something in the Messiah’s eyes, something he never saw before.
He saw pity and understanding. This is followed by the first words Jesus spoke to him, “I shall save you.”
For the first time, he felt curiosity. Of course, he didn’t realize it himself, as he still couldn’t distinguish between emotions, but the emotion he felt could be considered as such. Due to the knowledge he knew, Judas originally thought Jesus wanted to teach him how human emotions actually work, and for him to properly be a human.
That was nothing but a false hope, a random thought that could never be fulfilled.
He went on to follow Jesus, to observe what he meant by his first words and to see if such a thing was possible. For years, he walked the Earth with Jesus, watching him perform miracles after Miracles. However, even after witnessing humans of all kinds, he could still not feel any humanity within him.
Then came the Last Supper.
He followed his fate, not feeling the emotions as he was originally promised. All that he felt before was mere triflings, nothing much like Salvation that he heard so much about. But at the moment of Jesus’ death, he felt something, something on a scale never before.
It was as if he ate the forbidden fruit. His spine ruptured, every receptor in his body feeling a shiver that he didn’t know was possible. Watching Jesus’ death as a bystander, seeing the Savior that he followed for years being pierced to death finally made him realize what Jesus meant all along.
The words “I shall save you” that Jesus said didn't mean he was going to become a human. It meant he would feel emotions just like humans, the feelings of doing something forbidden, blasphemous. He thought to himself, “Ahh, this is what
must feel like!”
Judas concluded that if he can’t tell the difference between emotions, then he simply must feel them at a greater level, and that would finally provide a meaning for his actions. However, after the euphoria of Jesus’ death ended a few days later, he went back to the state the same as his life before Jesus. He was, in a way, depressed. However, this is when he remembered one of his lessons from Jesus, of the nature of the Throne of Heroes. If the humans who ascended are ones who perform great deeds, then he must also have the possibility of ascending as well! And when he would eventually be summoned, he would twist whatever events he was summoned in, to feel even greater levels of
! Then so came the end of Judas, as he quickly suicided, which elevated his name to the Throne.
However, God, sensing his plot, rapidly cursed him under the pretense of punishment for the death of Jesus, as he believed such a monster should never reappear after his purpose was complete. While this successfully trapped his original soul within the World, it was utterly pointless, as his name has already ascended. For that, even if Judas must suffer all of eternity being a wraith no one would approach, he relishes at thought of all the parallel worlds reaching
under him. And after that, he shall suicide, prompting him to be summoned to another world, to feel even more. He shall spread his
as after all, all the other apostles have already spread the words and their interpretation of Jesus Christ, and he can't be the Greatest Apostle if he didn’t spread Jesus’ message.
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Originally Posted by HumanComplex
