Monthly Create-A-Servant Contest

[jishara]

3 Points: James J. Kilroy (BnEl15) - I enjoyed this servant an absolute ton, especially how you created that Noble Phantasm.
2 Points: Catherine Morland (NailsInYourFeet) - This servant was quite impressive and super fun to see The two NPs are very creative and intriguing
1 Point: Daniel Stiebelt (Morg) - I loved this servant, especially how you utilized the second NP.

Honorable Mentions:
Rosencrantz and Guildenstern (NailsInYourFeet) - I thought this one was very fun, espeicially Bad Quarto
Epicurus (Alter) and William Henry Harrison (RoydGolden) - You created two very awesome servants, and I love how you used the first heretic to form "Authority over Heretics" and the Curse of Tippecanoo
O-O-O (Sutaa) - I loved how you utilized the ozone layer as a shield of earth.

[TQG Imaginatorious]

Okay, so the beginning's editing doesn't look appealing,
Too much personal skills, get rid of riding, High-Servant has too much words.

Can't fuse with Agrius, perhaps don't combine it with fraught Hades or if I did give it new ability, lore's too long and unimportant words, could have still been two paragraphs, for the personality that's a reference to Hisui and Kohaku? Cause now that you mentioned it the pairs are alike and that was unintentional.

Lastly, people could have problems with connecting and being tired with the twins due to probably the lore. Thanks pinetree! This sheet did actually better than I have expected in the eyes of someone as experienced as you. But tables? How do you do tables?

And finally the contest is over. So glad that I managed to complete the sheet in time. Now the voting...

[Comun]

3 points - Catherine Morland
2 points - Hachiko-Xolotl
1 point - O-O-O

On a structural and emotional level, Hachiko is the best sheet on this iteration. It absolutely deserves 3 points, and I'm confident it will get from many other voters. But Morland was a targeted attack. It pulled me in with a faceclaim of my waifu and delivered a very solid sheet of a character that pretty much has best girl's whole essence. Some name changes is all it would take for this sheet to work as a Shirogane sheet in the Modern Fiction thread. The brain insists my 3 should go to Hachiko, but the heart can't betray my long-cultivated brand as the Tsumugi Shirogane guy, sorry. There's no rule saying we need to pretend to be unbiased and I still believe Hachiko will win this one, so one less vote shouldn't make that much of a difference.

The last vote goes to Ozone because it best encapsulates the soul of the prompt. We have some very off-standard takes but none feel as genuinely creative as this one. This is a prime Watcher concept imo, but seeing the emotional mileage taken out of the Shielder class here, you definitely made a better choice than I would have (my direction also would have been more about associating the ozone layer with the firmament, but I guess that works perfectly fine as a headcanon for your version). Thank you Ozone-chan from always protecting us from that meanie Tamamo.

[TQG Imaginatorious]

So after some time thinking, I've come down to these 3. One of them was a obvious choice from the moment I read it but the other two was hard deciding so I pick the two that was the most memorable.
Hachiko-Xolotl- 3 points
Elisabetha&Johannes Hevelius- 2 points
O-O-O (Ozone layer)- 1 point

[BnEl15]

Honorable Mentions (in no particular order):

Hachiko-Xolotl (WhiteFrenzy)
...Huh, I think this is the first time in a while that Queen WF didn't make it to my top three. I do love the connection you've established between the two, and our good boy is all-around great, as expected from you. It's just that, well... I guess this goes to show how cutthroat the contest is this time around.

"Lady Mondegreen" (Jishara)
Cool concept all around, which I feel can be developed into... a lot more. You're definitely hitting the right spots, though.

English Game (Sutaa)
The other new Class that debuted in this competition. The idea is interesting, but it could use a lot more fleshing out, which I'm sure you can do in the future. Also I'm just not super familiar with the sport, which may lead to a lot of the references flying over my head. Looking forward to seeing more of this Class.

Daniel Steibelt (Morg van Destro)
My first impression of this guy is that he's essentially Salieri 2.0., but you actually wrote a lot more into him. Nice work.

1pt

Catherine Morland (NailsInYourFeet)
I'm probably biased here, but I just love themes of perception, psychology, imagination, and lesser-known characters in general. This sheet managed to hit all of my buttons, and I love how you developed a relatively simple concept into a compelling character without making her "just" a Don Quixote rehash, considering the similarities in their respective stories. Tsumugi fc is also a plus ofc.

2pts

St. Jane Frances de Chantal (Delrey)
Del, my man, not only did you just introduce a new Class here, you actually wrote two bangers back-to-back with it? Wow. I can see the Class being a mainstay here. It hits the right balance of being clearly defined enough, but not too specific. Even I can imagine one or two of my previous Servants qualifying for the Class. Anyway, as for your sheets here, it was honestly a really close competition between the two, but I ultimately chose the Saint. As much as I normally love wholesome romance, the Saint's connection to the Octopope gave it just the right amount of nudge to beat the competition. It's a bold addition on top of an already new concept, but that leap of faith made an already-great sheet even better.

3pts

Arthur C. Clarke (Legendary Hero of the Chain)
I will say that I am normally a very... character-focused guy. I'm dumb, and I don't usually care much for extensive lore, conceptual bullshittery, and deep science-y stuff. This sheet here is a rare exception. The buildup already did a fine job at setting the tone for the sheet, even if it is a little drawn-out. Afterwards, you did an amazing job at adapting his works into Skills and NPs, while explaining them in a way that doesn't feel like a slog to go through (a pitfall commonly faced by those who write very high-concept stuff, or maybe my brain just tends to get bored easily with that stuff). Just... amazing work, man. I'm looking forward to read the continuation of your story, if you have any planned.

[Vididii]

3 Points: Ozone Layer (Suuta): I think it's the perfect fusion of fitting simplicity, and flavorful writing that gives it the Whimsical X Factor I look at in nonstandard servants. From the creative source, the smooth transition of FC's, my space bias, the presence of her personality in ability.... It just works.
2 Points: Elisabetha Hevelius & Johannes Hevelius (DelRey): As I tried to convey whilst wasted, there's just that sorta wonder factor to them- I can't quite decide what does it for me, but there's the whimsy and otherness to it that I can't help but go to. It's so chock-full of info and terminology that I find it a little much, but in the end, it's the substance provided by the pair, and their beautifully harmonized abilities that I can't help but go with.
1 point: Hachiko-Xolotl (WhiteFrenzy): The sheet that made me tear up- I simply can't leave it out of my top three. In addition to greatly working for the prompt, I think it was my favorite sheet that tells a story of the contest- It's what edges it out over my ties for fourth. Good Balance as well.

Honorable Mentions:
My 2 runners-up, and ties for 4th- Wyvern's Arion and DesReploid's Unknown Soldiers: I Think Arion, in his simplicity, feels one of the most like a classical type moon servant before shit got super crazy, while still utterly nailing the prompt. Unknown Soldiers are a wonderful, HORRIBLE force to behold- I adore the touch on them being able to be spoken to when graced with a soldier's grave before them, and I think them being night-unstoppable fits the theme and their composition really really well.

Morg Van Destro's Daniel Steibert: A superb sheet, possessing of my favorite NP in the contest. The Transition requirement just works so damn well.

RoydGolden's William Henry Harrison: His personality (and admittedly Bandit Keith ref) make him the servant I think would benefit a setting most by being placed into it. He feels like someone that you could pop into any Fate story, and he'd be a net positive, regardless of tone or setting, since he's active, dynamic, but comes off as narratively flexible and intelligent despite his sorta rowdiness.

Drangle's CCCP- The Goodest boi(s) in space- I can't rank them up top, but they are absolutely my PERSONAL favorite of the contest.

Nuclear's Michelangelo- I want to fuck him.

Snow Queen's Tale, Arthur Clarke, and Kilroy are also some of my favorites

[DelRey]

Ah, the greatest lowkey honor is when someone wants to bang your servant.

Bn, when making the class, your pope from secret santa was one of the candidates that popped into my head. Using friendship as a weapon like he did could very well make him worthy of a Binder.
Id love to see one of the veterans do me the honor and jump on the bandwagon with this class to explore what one could do with it

[pinetree]

I'll definitely jump in, I was just waiting for you to post it first

Though it'll have to wait until I finish another project I've left alone for too long... Well, two projects I've left alone...

[BnEl15]

Yeah, the first two that came to my mind are the pope and that Tokugawa Shogun who "chained" the entire nation from the future through the Sakoku decree.
I don't have any other candidates just yet (heck, I'm currently stuck in another procrastination rut myself), but I look forward to see your class taking off.

[DelRey]

I think i even know one, hmmm

Edit: on my potential binder list i wanna do (not the list i gave) are a math nerd, a greek and a musician.
I stay true to my expertise i guess

[sutaa]

Three points: Hachiko-Xolotl (WhiteFrenzy)
One of the best expressions of the prompt, I think. Connecting these two figures should be absurd on every conceptual level, but you just make it work, and the overall result tugs on your heartstrings. You had me feeling "I wish this was canon," which is the best.
Two points: St. Jane Frances de Chantal (DelRey)
I spent a while dithering as to which Binder I liked best, before settling on this one. The calm, serene, slightly-off mood you create and hold through the whole thing really sells it for me. Looking forward to seeing more of the class (and.. maybe take a stab at it myself later).
One pont: Unknown Soldiers (DesReploid)
The perfect Nameless Servant sheet. For a character without dialogue or really an individual self, you conveyed a whole lot of personality in their skills/NP. Kind of wish I could rate it higher.

Honourable mentions: Arthur Clarke, Daniel Steibert, Catherine Morland, Kilroy

[NINE-lives]

3 points: Arthur Clarke.

2 points: Hassan of the blessed fist.

1 point: hachiko-xolotl.

I gotta vote for these out of loyalty to my mutuals.

[DelRey]

I am surprised how people voted so far. Gonna be an interesting week

[sutaa]

There were a lot of entries! All spectacular, too. It's going to be fun seeing how the votes pan out.

[pinetree]

1pt - BnEl15's Watcher James J. Kilroy
A sheet that is almost a rework. Reviting a previous idea and elevating it by tightening its focus.

2pts - sutaa's Shielder O-O-O
As Comum said, the sheet that best encapsulates what I had in mind when creating this contest. Though, what really got the vote was her wonderful personality. The sheet is full of life and the way you adapt the concept into character traits is, as I said before, is lovely. Karl got my vote last contest, your Pretender was great over on the other contest, and now this and the super fun English Game? You got me watching bro. Amazing work. Would have gotten 3 points had I not been sucker punched by...

3pts - DelRey's Binder St. Jane Frances de Chantal
By the time I reached the Noble Phantasm I was already struggling with the fact that I'd have to choose between this and the Heveliuses. The choice of those specific fanarts of Makima for the faceclaims was impactful from the start and really enhanced the sheet as you elaborated on the contrast between her saintly words and the deep depression she suffers, it gave a whole new meaning to Makima's piercing eyes.

Then, when I saw Clement I was honestly fucking mad. You're ruining it all to make another Foreigner? No!! I was begging it to just end there.

Of course, that didn't last long. Double Summon is such a boring skill, but using it to add the Outer God in a non-intrusive way? Genius. I've said before that what draws me to writing Foreigners is the possibility of enhancing the struggles a character already had by giving them an representation in the form of the eldritch god. It conveys those struggles in very clear terms by taking the feelings of powerlessness and externalizing them as an undefeatable enemy.
This is one of the best examples of it. I went back to writing more sheets after I saw you praising my Claude Monet by chance. Everything you liked about him can be said tenfold about this St. Jane.
From the choice of character, to faceclaim, to formatting, to integration of narrative into the sheet... It simply is your best work.

(I happened to be listening to Little Dark Age while reading, I think it ehanced it too.)

- - - Updated - - -

Oh, I almost forgot to add. kiwi, Kamera and SimpleScribe are three people I was really excited to see play with this prompt. At least two of them had work-in-progress, so I hope I get to see you three tackle it someday! Even outside the contest.

[NailsInYourFeet]

3 Points - BnEl15's James J. Kilroy

For taking a meme before 'meme' was a word and treating him as completely legit, and pointing out 'his' greatest accomplishment by fooling Hitler (also, Kilroy would technically be Greatest Gen/Veteran, not a Boomer, but I guess you're using boomer in the general sense)

2 Points - RoydGolden's William Henry Harrison

For getting quite a lot of material out of the shortest-lived US President, and the whole idea of an oratory Berserker.Also for having him be a front for a bigger, spookier Servant concept

1 Point - RoydGolden's Epicurus (Alter)

For showing a significantly different interpretation of the same Servant, and the whole 'Father of Heresies' idea, especially pointing out the word 'Epikoros'

Honourable Mentions:

Unknown Soldiers - Would've been my 4th place pick, love the Great Man Theory questioning

English Game - For having The Christmas Truce be a NP

Elisabetha & Johanna Hevelius - I like the general idea of the Binder class, and those are some really pretty faceclaims. I'll admit I did scroll over most of the sheet, though you can call me a hypocrite for that since Kilroy's sheet is also pretty long

Mondegreen - Clever and unusualTying her in with Babel is icing on the cake

[RoydGolden]

Huh, rare to get two votes going to the same person. I appreciate it though.

[NailsInYourFeet]

Yeah, for a second I didn't know if voting for both submissions by one person was allowed, but I couldn't find anything in the rules against it

Also, some more info on Catherine. One reason she became associated with Tsumugi in my mind was because I knew someone who was planning a fanganronpa where everyone was from classic Gothic literature (Faust, Frankenstein, Jekyll & Hyde, et al.), and I thought to suggest Cathy Morland. No idea how that fangan's coming along right now though, but anyway

That said, another influence on her sheet was Misogi Kumagawa, given her NP's similarities to All-Fiction and Book Maker (though without the wood screws natch). There was also a little bit in there from the winning Galileo sheet from earlier, since it got me thinking about the opposite to his NPs, one that alters things to have an irrational explanationn

[DelRey]

Its such a plottwist to me that jane gets the points of pinetree instead of the Hevelius couple. Id never guessed that a last minute entry, which personality i had to rebuild from scratch due to a loading error, would be this well received. But i am glad either way.

[Legendary Hero of the Chain]

Honorable Mentions: Extinction, Hassan of the Blessed Fist, CCCP, Epicurus Alter, and Elisabetha & Johannes Hevelius

5th English Game: I really love when risks are taken in contests, and going so far as to use a completely original class definitely earns this guy big points. Honestly, I love how you played off each team, and the NP was a wonderful choice. HOWEVER, as a proud scotsman, I am legally obligated to not give points to an english football team. Also, others just sadly beat it out.

4th Unknown Soldiers: It's not the first time the nameless/unknown soldier has been done as a servant, however the sheer quality of the sheet helps it stand above the rest. The rage, the explanation, each part works so well together to make him amazing. Sadly, he falls an inch short.

3rd Hachiko-Xolotl(1 Point):I love him, I really do. Throughout, you make me feel such love and connection to these good boys. However, the sheet is not without its flaws. The length is not one of them, I'd be a hypocrite to say it was, but pieces feel like they could have received a bit more emphasis in a few place. Honestly, a wonderful sheet, and well earning its points.

2nd Watcher - James J. Kilroy(2 Points): I am usually not a fan of modern memes and stuff, a bit of an old soul in that regards, and probably an attribute I share with Kilroy. Honestly, the very idea of a meme made servant should be ludicrous, but the execution left me amazed since the very beginning. An idea who just wants to help, a patriot that goes so far to reach from imagination to reality to oppose tyranny. There's little question in my mind why this sheet held my first choice from the beginning to almost the very end.

Funny then, that the final sheet to be posted is what dethroned it.

1st St. Jane Frances de Chantal(3 Points): As I said with English Game, experimental things are going to help you a lot in my judgment, and Binder, much like Player, does just that. Rocketing both sheets of yours to the top 10. However, Jane... Jane won my vote for a long list of reasons, but in the end, it falls to three categories. Double Summon, Personality, and, surprisingly enough, FC.

For Double Summon, it's simple. Her faith, her belief, everything is so great to pull her out of the waters beyond creation back to the arms of humanity. It creates a respect for her beliefs that is hard to beat, and yet to still see her doubts plague her so much that they feature as the main part of the class. It really helps show how near that fall really was, justifying it more than just a 'oh yeah, this thing' addition, and helping the sheets depth, at least to me.

For Personality, I just really like the one you gave her. Honestly, I understand you lost the original, but I don't think I could see her with any other. It just really helps sell her doubts, and beliefs all the more as it is.

Finally, FC. Makima is genuinely one of my favourite villains of all time, are part of the reason for that is here sheer outright, unrepentant evil. To take that face, and make me feel sympathy for it... that takes some power, honestly. Enough to earn you the top spot in my votes.