Elise Pelltier
Location: End's Store & Post
Phase: Morning Phase
Date: 08.09.1994 (WED)
Weather: Overcast
Originally Posted by Sue Popplewell
"Sorry love, don't mean to give you a scare just after you've moved here. Most likely it was just some mentally troubled person passing through the town, long gone now. Pay it no mind."
Elise nodded silently as she processed this information about the grisly business that had happened at the Ramshack.
Considering Road's End borders on a forest that has a reputation for swallowing people whole... attacking a vagrant and leaving his body to be found is either an incredibly sloppy vampire, or an incredibly unlucky one, considering how easy it would be, I dunno, just drag or lure someone off into the woods where they're never heard from again.... considered Elise, Lucille said that she and Sakura were here to find the spawn of a vampire that killed a comrade of hers... If it was a newly turned vampire, that could explain why it was so sloppy, but does about a year ago line up with her timeline? I'm not sure...
Although.... if Devon was following up on that lead at the Ramshack, was he looking for the vampire too? Was he aware of Lucille and Sakura's mission, and scouting for them too, or was he acting independently? Also, I suppose, did he run afoul of this hypothetical vampire who may or may not have skipped town?
John asked some familiar questions that she recalled him asking the last time they were in the store together. Ms. Popplewell was thoroughly distracted answering his questions.
That made this the perfect moment to strike.
Elise hastily made her away from counter, and grabbed what she was fairly certain was the same copy she'd had the previous week of a certain book, as well as a few other items around the store that she wanted.
There is no way I am passing on 50% off ice-cream!
She returned to the counter with the rest of her bounty, book, band-aids, and ice cream, and deposited them there for purchase just in time to hear Ms. Popple reminisce about Remmie.
Originally Posted by Sue Popplewell
"... She was always full of life. Was curious about everything, more confident than anyone I've ever met, and hopeless romantic who fell in love with every guy she saw. Yeah... I suppose that's a good way to describe her. An eternal romantic."
She glanced towards her copy of End of the Road, already stashed in a paper bag by Ms. Popplewell.
I'm so sorry, Remmie. I'm glad that I've found you, but it's too bad that I've missed you.
Elise Pelltier's Purchases
Jurassic Park Band-Aid x4
Garigari-kun x4
Compass
Sheet of stamps and assorted letter stuff
Doctor Sexy MD
End of the Road - Guide to the town of Road's End and its History
Elaine Winters & Alexstrasza Lockhart
Location: Pinefall High Pool
Phase: Morning Phase
Date: 08.09.1994 (THU)
Weather: Overcast
"T-t-total pain in the ass?!" I said with a gasp, before sulking slightly. "Th-th-that's not true at all! I am now in possession of... wait a minute, let me count..."
Uwaa... I have more friends then I have fingers... This school is a really incredible place...
"E-e-eleven friends!" I replied, beaming with pride as I held up both of my hands, fingers splayed apart. "That's more then my fingers, Travis! This is a real improvement from my previous school. I only had one friend there! No, one and a half!"
I sighed happily, holding my hands close to my chest.
"This school really is a delight... The Headmaster was definitely correct on a few things, I suppose..."
Murmuring to myself for a moment, I listened to Elaine speak, before my eyes flashed open and I blinked excitedly.
"Well, isn't it easy then? If you were to follow me in after I fainted, citing your concern, it would not be so hard to cause a distraction, yes? A falling light, a shivering chill that runs down the good doctor's spine... Just a way to get out of the room for long enough to start a serious investigation! Don't worry, because I have an excellent solution for you!"
I gave everyone a thumbs up.
"I'll just make my heart stop for a moment! It's an acquired skill, so I do not recommend trying it! But, nevertheless, it is part of my, shall we say... repertoire."
It's important to help the people around you, even if their desires seem a bit silly at times. Just because someone's 'done something disagreeable', does not make them a disagreeable person. By helping others, I suppose, there's a way to become more whole, yes? To fill that gaping void? Or perhaps it is simply yet another nihilistic desire that exists in this wicked heart of mine, tangling others in webs far too complicated to understand, yet easily misled. These simple things, these dreams and ideals of 'friendship', of 'value'... They're quite kind, aren't they?
Yes. Just a bit. I'm sorry Muse, Teacher, Headmaster, but just a little longer.
I'm really enjoying playing pretend. Maybe a bit more then I should.
in the end we will make thoughtcrime impossible, for there shall be no words to express it
#THELEGENDNEVERDIES
[01:05.15] <@Spinach> I can flash gang signs faster than Sasuke can perform ninjutsu and I rap like Medea's High Speed Divine Words.
Anna Vandemeel Location: Spade Queen Country Club Phase: Morning Phase Date: 08.09.1994 (THU) Weather: Overcast
"Whatever, hayseed. I don't have any interest in you, your name, or what you're here for. I paid good money to rent a room here just so I wouldn't have to deal with droopy-eyed, drooling locals,"
"Mr. Challenger - we need to go now. We've wasted enough time as it is. I don't know what you were talking with Mr. Pinkerton about the whole morning, but-"
Anna felt an immediate flash of white-hot anger and irritation race through her veins at Dakota’s words. For the briefest of moments, Anna’s red eyes glinted with a dangerous, cold, light, before returning back to their earlier casual ease.
Tsk… Not only a moron but also someone with a hearing disability, from the looks of it. I literally just told you a second ago that I’m not from this place you nitwit.
From the looks of it, Challenger definitely had his pet properly leashed at least, considering how easily Dakota’s facial features morphed into that of terror once he actually put his foot down.
A dangerous man, no doubt, irrespective of whether he was intermixed in the Turnside or not.
"I shall see you later, yes."
“Till the next time, we meet then, Mr. Challenger. Best of luck to you on your… surveys and paper analysis, was it?”
The insinuation of a man responsible for “gazing down at our world from above” via satellites telling her that he’ll be “seeing her” was not lost on Anna. All things considered, she might have ended up drawing more unintentional attention on her with this little trip than she originally assumed. Granted, something like that might end up playing to her benefit in the long run.
If I kick enough hornet’s nests, I’m bound to hit the correct one sooner or later.
"--- See what I mean? One of them is unpleasant and easy to read, while the other..."
"... Just feels like trouble."
Anna let out a small chuckle even as her eyes remained glued at the black car that was now vanishing behind the bend of the road they had just come down on moments ago.
“Hmm…. That guy feels like a layer of oil on top of a puddle. Slippery. Trouble for sure. Terrifies the crap out of that “Ms. Discovery” as well, no matter how loudly she barks.” Anna’s eyes turned away from the road and towards Zane with a grin on her lips. “That woman though… high on both her obnoxious perfume and arrogance, I’d say.”
The small shrug Anna gave made it evidently clear that the raven-haired girl had very little respect for the woman in question, even if her talents in astronomy were as exceptional as Elliot had suggested earlier.
“But enough about those two.” Anna’s attention was captured by the mansion grounds that laid behind the gates and a hint of humor crept into her voice. “You’re taking care of the grounds, right? How about you give me a tour of all the highlights, eh?”
Elaine Winters & Alexstrasza Lockhart Location: Pinefall High Pool Phase: Morning Phase Date: 08.09.1994 (THU) Weather: Overcast
Travis stared at Alexstrasza with a dumbfounded expression... until a weary, defeated sigh escaped from his lips and he buried his face into this hands. Noah, who had been watching from the sidelines, smirked ever-so-slightly and shrugged, his long sleeves flapping like a pair of wings.
"... Oh dear. Looks like the real him is peeking through," the violet-haired boy commented to the girls. "Truly, this one is a master of causing frustration..."
The last words were directed at Alexstrasza, of course.
The source of the current headache.
Travis on the other hand...
"Uuuurggh. No, we're not gonna have you... stop your heart or some shit like that. The mere implications give me the creeps as a professional. The stoppage of oxygen to brain alone would... ugh, never mind," the thug-like boy said, before turning towards Elaine. "Y'know, even if they're expensive, I'd rather give this other doctor a try before we try to tackle End's Mercy. I just get the feeling we shouldn't go there all half-cocked."
His eyes swiveled back at Alexstrasza, and he grimaced yet again.
"... Especially if our plan is to trust this dunce to put on a convincing medical drama."
With a sigh, Travis then turned his head towards the door and gestured towards it with his chin.
"Anyways - we can talk 'bout this more during the lunchbreak or something. Right now we should go pick up the brat and head to class, or otherwise we're gonna get on Miss Min's shitlist," he continued. "As for you Noah... return to the hotel and keep me informed. I'll contact you if we need your help. And you contact me if you find... that person, alright?"
Indeed, the time this morning was running short. It would be best to at least pick up 17 before she was left all alone at the cafeteria... though it was unlikely that people like Cesarina and Ramia would simply abandon her.
Meanwhile, as the group started making their leave, Subaru kept counting with her fingers, and for some reason, a confused frown appeared on her face.
"Eleven friends...?" She muttered, glancing at Alexstrasza. "Has she really been that quick...?"
Anna Vandemeel Location: Spade Queen Country Club Phase: Morning Phase Date: 08.09.1994 (THU) Weather: Overcast
Originally Posted by Anna
“But enough about those two. You’re taking care of the grounds, right? How about you give me a tour of all the highlights, eh?”
Zane stared at Anna for a moment with an odd expression... almost as if the boy was trying to study the emotions hidden underneath her usual facade. Perhaps he had sensed that Ms. Discovery's words had sparked anger in her (not that it was hard to miss), or perhaps he had simply sensed her internal musings about Mr. Challenger... nevertheless, the redhead was clearly trying to get a read on something about her, and the way she was taking in the situation.
Still... was he able to?
Who knows?
If he did, he certainly didn't show it.
After all, just as quickly as he had done it, Zane simply chuckled a bit himself and shook his head, as if dispelling whatever he himself had been thinking.
"Mm, alright. It's nothing to brag about, but I do try to keep good care of the grounds here. After all, as decadent as it is, it's still a pretty building. It would be just a waste of everyone's time and money if the grounds were left looking like ass," Zane grunted, motioning Anna to follow him. "Mr. Pinkerton had this garden installed in the back but had no idea what to do with it, so I more or less booted him off those premises and made it mine. I've been studying gardening on the side, see. Mostly edible plants and what-not. I mean, you never know when you'll need something that last through even harsher times and be useful in the long run."
A momentary pause, during which Zane frowned.
"... Not that it means they can't look nice, though."
And with that, Anna's tour to the grounds of the Spade Queen Country Club began...
Location: End’s Store & Post Phase: Morning Phase Date: 08.09.1994 Weather: Overcast
John watches the storekeeper pack his purchase with well-accustomed hands in silence, listens to her answers in silence, and places his cash on the counter in silence.
Indeed, silence is his answer to everything happening around him. It is not passive silence, but a very conscious choice to keep his thoughts to himself this time. As someone who can only behave through adaptively reproducing components of human behavior he has learned from watching others, there are times in which he has no other choice but to do nothing and say nothing. What is there to say if nothing comes up in his mind?
After all, there is no way the likes of John Dove can understand the "romance" Sue Popplewell is talking about.
“Thank you very much,” he says curtly when receiving the bag with his purchases. “I’ll be relying on you for the next year, Miss Popplewell.”
Lying still comes as naturally as breathing. Perhaps last week has not changed him as much as he thinks (as much as it should have?).
His mind is already set on the road back to school. If he arrives late to class, he will apologize. Skipping out on classes should be a last resort. After all, he is a high school student. That is his current “position” in this grey world. Even if he is trapped in this supernatural mess, that is in no way an excuse to put aside his responsibility to play the role assigned to him on the stage called “the world”. That is the primary way to avoid bothersome complications in this colorless life.
“I wish you a pleasant rest of the day,” he says, perhaps to the shopkeeper, perhaps to his classmates as well. Only they know what they intend to do after this.
Location: Pinefall High - Classroom 106
Phase: School Phase
Date: 08.09.1994 (THU)
Weather: Overcast [BGM]
"... Pens down, please."
A sense of relief, tinged with a hint of fear, washed over the classroom 106 when the quiet, yet steel-like, voice announced that. This was followed by the rattle of writing instruments against tables, and more than few sighs that escaped from the lips of those present. Soon afterwards, the shuffling sound of paper being moved followed, as the pop quiz sheets were being collected, each person handing them over to the one ahead of them in the row, until all stacks ended up at the teacher's desk. Though, while this had been a pop quiz of sorts, one other term was far more apt.
Sudden death quiz.
That's how it felt like at least, to first spend an hour learning solving for X in various ways that just kept getting more and more complicated, the blackboard behind the tiny teacher slowly filling up with equation after equation, all made with impeccable penmanship to the point that it almost felt like it had been drawn by a computer. And after this hour was done, suddenly that same tiny teacher had slammed a stack of papers in front of them telling each to take three papers, and prepare for a test. Apparently, repetition was the mother of all learning in this classroom, and thus, after drilling into the students' heads the methods, the tiny purple teacher decided to test their skills of retention and memory by immediately giving them a set of problems.
Such was the Spartan training of Sae Min - or Miss Min, as she was to be called in class.
Naturally, the atmosphere that had been silent as a grave had made the test-situation feel even more oppressive than usual, especially with Miss Min's eyes glaring down on anyone who didn't focus on the papers before them, but as the minutes ticked by... slowly but surely, the students had started to notice something. Namely, their teacher hadn't erased the equations from the blackboard - on purpose. It was almost as if she was saying to them that she didn't want them to commit everything to memory now... rather, she wanted them to learn how to use the right tools for the right job - right equation, right formula. And sure enough, when some students started to scan the blackboard with their eyes, they didn't earn the Min Death Glare for their troubles.
And just like that, the grueling test came to a close.
After all, while they had been given the right tools... the questions weren't easy. Far from it. They felt even harder because of that.
"I will be grading these today, so you can expect to have yours returned tomorrow afternoon," Miss Min spoke, leafing through the stack of papers casually. "Speaking of which, if you happen to see Mr. Davin or Ms. Winters later today, please inform them that they will be required to complete this same test tomorrow, after school, during their detention. However, the questions will be different, so sharing your graded papers with them will not be of any use to them."
A slight chill passed through the room, like a night-time wind.
Clearly, Miss Min was not particularly thrilled about two students having decided to play truant... especially with one of them already having done so yesterday.
"Still... good work everyone. Even with just a glance, I can see that you all have tried your best," Miss Min continued, setting the papers aside. "We still have about twenty minutes of class left, however... so perhaps you've earned some levity for now. Maybe even a chance for a prize, so to speak. Let's see now..."
Miss Min let her eyes scan through the classroom, until they stopped at one particular person.
One person who shrinked in their chair, looking horrified he was now the center of the attention.
"Mister Bahkauv. Could I ask for your cooperation?" Miss Min said, as she brought out a small basket and a small box from underneath the table, and set them on the surface. "Please come over here."
Gabi, who was looking like a nervous wreck, shuffled over to the teacher. Soon the boy was standing in front of the whole class, looking like he wanted to simply disappear into a hole and never come back up. However, Miss Min didn't seem to be bothered by it. Instead, she opened one of the drawers and pulled out what looked like a piece of candy, with a bright pink wrapper. Strawberry maybe? Without saying a word, she handed the candy to Gabi.
"Now then, Mister Bahkauv... please place that piece of candy in either the box or the basket."
Gabi, as nervous as ever, froze like a deer in headlights under this sudden pressure. Still, Miss Min waited patiently for the boy to recover enough that he was able to make the choice that was required of him. After few minutes of hesitating between the two choices, Gabi finally lifted the cloth over the basket and placed the candy inside it. Then he quickly pulled back his hand as if he was expecting something to jump out of the darn basket and bite him. Miss Min look at the basket for a moment, then at Gabi, and finally nodded with a hint of smile on her face.
"Thank you. Now, if you could please step outside the classroom for one minute, and then re-enter?"
While confused and clearly befuddled about what was going on, Gabi did as was asked and exited the classroom. Soon enough, the rest of the class could hear him count seconds quietly outside the door. However, all attention was quickly caught by the movement of Miss Min's hands as she quietly lifted the cloth over the basket, took out the piece of candy, and slipped it into the box and closed to lid. Then she put her hands onto the table, steepled her fingers, and waited in complete silence for Gabi to finish his count. The atmosphere in the room was growing more and more confused by the second, stares switching between the closed door and patiently waiting Miss Min.
Eventually, the long minute came to a halt. Gabi re-entered the room, and glanced around the room, fidgeting with his hands. Miss Min, on the other hand, nodded at him, clearly satisfied, and turned back to the class.
"Now then... while this is slightly different from our previous topics of math, let me ask you this. If Mr. Bahkauv now retrieves his candy, where should he retrieve it from?"
Prushka
Location: Pinefall High - Classroom 106
Phase: School Phase
Date: 08.09.1994 (THU)
Weather: Overcast
My hand calmly rises.
I know the answer without even having to think about it. More interesting than the question is the teacher herself.
Previously, I paid little attention to Sae Min, or any of the adults really. But now... I find my eyes drawn to her.
She's not bad. As a teacher, that is. Good strategy, not relying on rote memorization, focusing on asking questions over giving answers and using what was taught instead of just holding onto it... but that says nothing about her as a person.
The answer, if called on
"The basket."
"This is that test you give toddlers, isn't it? To see whether they can conceptualize the idea of an 'other' that does not see things from their point of view."
I can't remember the actual name of the test off the top of my head, or who invented it, but the concept is simple enough.
"A young enough child can't understand that what they know and what others know are separate. So they would answer that Gabi should take the candy from the box, since that's where we saw you move it. But an older child would say Gabi should go to the basket, since he wasn't here to see you move the candy and would have no reason to think that it moved to the box."
This is more of a university-level lesson. Strange that it's being taught here. Or maybe it's applicable?
"Then again... maybe Gabi saw something we didn't. For all we know, that basket might already be full of candy."
Last edited by Bloble; August 27th, 2020 at 06:16 PM.
Location: Pinefall High - Classroom 106 Phase: School Phase Date: 08.09.1994 (THU) Weather: Overcast
Spoiler:
“This is a textbook example of the Sally-Anne text,” starts John Dove after raising his hand and thus claiming the right to speak. “Developed to investigate the presence of a ‘Theory of Mind’ in developing children; that defined as the ability to understand the beliefs, desires, intentions, and emotions of oneself and others, and therefore being able to predict what others will do.”
In this specific example, Bakhauv has taken the role of “Sally”, and Miss Min that of “Anne.” More importantly, does this guy actually listen to the words coming out of his mouth?
“A child with a Theory of Mind is able to understand Sally’s—that is, Gabi Bakhauv’s—perspective, and realize that he will look for the marble in the basket where he placed it. If I remember correctly, it was reported that 80% of children with autism fail to answer in this way.”
Hey, seriously, John Dove. This is important. Could you try not just reciting knowledge memorized from somewhere and actually internalizing what you are saying?
The hopeless idiot pauses then, narrowing his gaze as an additional thought enters his mind.
“Perhaps the test in flawed in the current conditions, however. The presence of additional actors besides ‘Sally’ and ‘Anne’,” he posits, vaguely gesturing over the mostly-filled classroom. “Opens additional avenues for Bakhauv to acquire additional information.”
Even more importantly, where in tarnation are Colton Davin and Elaine?
Liana Skye
Location: Pinefall High - Classroom 106
Phase: School Phase
Date: 08.09.1994 (THU)
Weather: Overcast
---Obediently, she had gone through all of the motions of the classroom life.
Smiling at her friends as she arrived back at the school, grimacing at the sudden appearance of a sudden death quiz (even more so because they were barely into the school year as it was) and even letting out a sigh of relief at the end of everything, when she could put her pencil down and put the test and it's contents behind her, vaguely annoyed at how circumstances had made it a lot more complex than it needed to be...
Ordinarily, a test like this would be remarkably simple, however...
The current factors, the environment, well...
Everything's so closed off in this town... Didn't really sink in until just now...
"..."
...It was what it was.
Remarkably low-tech for a refurbished school too... Figured the Oceandrop Program's money would be more obviously present in the classrooms, but I guess it went somewhere else...
---Even so, this shouldn't bother her very much; the time for class was a time to put on a smile and put her best foot forward... Part of the reason she had even come to this town at all was a (possibly doomed) attempt to put together the pieces of her obviously damaged psyche, but today...
No cameras either... No obvious ones anyway...
Today... Class just felt like wasted time...
She couldn't enjoy it like she had yesterday...
Suspicions of being caught up in time-space phenomena were one thing, confirmations were another...
The air of innocence was gone.
A bit too quiet in here for my tastes too...
Even so, it was a problem with no good solutions; skipping class seemingly meant detention, detention would hinder her ability to move about in the evenings, disregarding detention to pursue her varying assignments would likely lead to some drastic intervention by the faculty, the sort of intervention that can't be cleanly broken through without shattering her ability to wander the town unimpeded, in other words...
---Right now, under these conditions, class was an annoying, but also necessary, thing for her to do...
Still...
Once the test is over... The dark-haired young woman just...
Stops giving her full attention to the class itself...
She is aware enough to not zone out completely, teachers like to prey on those that are clearly not paying attention after all, but multi-tasking had always been one of her strong points, yes...
"..."
For now she'll simply live in that hollow world of half-attention, thinking of a future that grows heavier and heavier with the passage of time.
...Yesterday's class had definitely been more fun for her.
Although...
That was just more of a reason to solve the problem.
Being able to live a normal life for awhile... That'd be nice...
The organization should let her live out the year here at least after everything was said and done, so that was something to look forward to-!
Just have to deal with the local boogeyman and his friends first...
Well...
Life was never easy...
Last edited by Airen; August 27th, 2020 at 08:04 PM.
Exodus (Complete)
Even if the author is silenced, the performance is stilled and the actors leave the stage, the story will never truly end.
Regardless of the form it takes, as long as there are memories of it's existence, the story will continue on.
In a small ward in the heart of a once devastated town, life carries on as it always has...
Because of you.
Please, remember it warmly.
We'll continue to walk down this path for eternity.
Alexstrasza Lockhart
Location: Pinefall High - Classroom 106
Phase: School Phase
Date: 08.09.1994 (THU) Weather: Overcast
Find him.
I smiled brightly at the teacher, before watching Cesarina grapple with the problem with twinkling eyes.
Kill him.
Honestly, such a problem isn't even that difficult - but I just have a nursery rhyme the zombie oft murmured while cleaning the orphanage running through my mind.
Find him.
How did it go, again...? Tear out his guts and flay him clean, carve him right up but don't be mean?
Kill him.
Everytime I look at Cesarina, I see a flash of red. A garish slick of blood on her neck. Horror in her eyes. In all honesty, I have been naive. Forgiveness? What a joke. Some things--
Kill him.
--Are unforgivable.
Kill him.
The classes, the tests -- I'm starting to envy Elaine and Colt, honestly. Is there any real point? Is there? Is there? It seems that no matter what I do, I'm damned.
Kill him.
Feast on his bones, but do not gnaw, rip out his heart while it's still raw... Tear out his spine, with your maw... I believe that is how it went, but it's so hard to remember it. My eyes were glazing over as I stared at Cesarina. Her screams pierced through my head like nails. Nails. Nails. Nails. Nails. Nails. I can't get it out of my head. I can't stop thinking about it. Seeing it. Hearing it.
Kill him.
I tapped my desk with one hand, the other on my face. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. There are things I need to do. There are tasks I need to accomplish. One is to find a man. A man who does not have a face, and soon will not have a soul. Forgetting? Letting go of the past? Naive. How dizzyingly naive. Never forget. Never let go of a grudge. I forgot lessons, lessons that were important - more important then going to school, or making friends. Idiot. Stupid. Don't be forgetful.
Kill him.
Taptaptaptaptaptaptaptap. My smile feels forced onto my face. My skin feels like it doesn't fit. The words he said run through my mind, on repeat, on repeat, on repeat, on repeat. Tatatatataaaaap. I can't escape this feeling, of not belonging, of needing to do something.
Kill him.
Lick off the blood, with teeth pristine, File your nails to make him scream. He's right, oh my. I'd forgotten. Haha. Hahahahahaha. Thank you for the reminder, O Man without a Face.
"You know what the real difference between you and me is?"
Yes. Yes yes yes yes!I'd forgotten, yes! You're right, I'm sorry! Ahhhh, this haze of humanity that I wear like a facade -- poor form, you're correct! It's true!
"--I don't pretend I don't enjoy this."
Ahhh, pretend? What foolish webs we immortals weave! To think I 'pretend' to dislike it? Taptaptap! Do you think me fixated, man without a face? Do you think me devilish, fellow monster?
"And at least I don't shut my eyes at what I've done."
I laughed, at the air, in the middle of class. I burst out into a fit of laughter, so hard I could barely breathe. It was only a moment, before I controlled myself into a fit of small giggles, as his words finally hit me. Oh, shutting my eyes? How arrogant, no? The depravity, the lunacy to say such a thing is ridiculous.
I killed that entire village and enjoyed every second of it.
My sin stains my life with a river so red with blood that it drowns me.
I am a monster.
I am a monster.
I am a monster.
So it is fine, yes? It is fine to kill, yes? Do not worry, my friend! I assure you, that I most certainly do enjoy it! Peeling your fingernails from your hands, dragging a thin blade down your arm... Ahhhh, it's sending shivers down my spine, just thinking about it! Thank you so very much!
I raised my hand, smiling brightly. It was a good day.
Spoiler:
"The basket, no?" I said, tilting my head to the side. "While I am not familiar with the name of such a test, I believe it is a test on whether children can understand that things that are not them exist, whether they are or are not there."
I do not know many terms of this world. All of my knowledge is located in the arcane and ancient. My teachers range from Ptolemy to Aristotle, moreso then these more modern tests. It is disappointing, to be so academically unsuccessful here, but it is fine, no? I am, after all, not here for school. I have more distracting goals.
I wonder where he is.
I should find him.
I should take him. Just as an example! He did it first, so it is simply 'returning a favor'! And then we can play a game of memory! You see, I have a rather terrible memory, so I suppose he'll have to help me! Where did he stab her first? Was it the side? The chest? She lived through it all, it was really impressive! Of course, I'll have to make sure he does as well, but that's not so hard! Blood is, after all, a very malleable substance! Should I turn it to fire? Should I remove it? Add more? He won't need to worry, because we have so many delightful options available to us!
I smiled.
I want to kill him.
Last edited by Frantic Author; August 27th, 2020 at 10:55 PM.
in the end we will make thoughtcrime impossible, for there shall be no words to express it
#THELEGENDNEVERDIES
[01:05.15] <@Spinach> I can flash gang signs faster than Sasuke can perform ninjutsu and I rap like Medea's High Speed Divine Words.
Elise Pelltier
Location: Pinefall High - Classroom 106
Phase: School Phase
Date: 08.09.1994 (THU)
Weather: Overcast
Numbers.
So many numbers and equations.
The sudden death math quiz had been grueling, but whatever Ms. Min had set up with this basket and box felt like a welcome diversion from more math.
Jake did say that Ms. Min is supposedly a pretty big name in the scientific world, especially in psychology… thought Elise, recalling a conversation with the janitor on a distant Saturday morning, That would explain this sudden change of- Oh! Wait! I think I know this one!
Elise raised her hand.
Spoiler:
"That's an example of the Sally-Anne test, right? Gabi would look for the candy in the basket, because that's where he left it. We, the observers, know that you moved the candy into the box while he was out of the room, but Gabi doesn't. There's no reason for him to believe that his candy has been moved to a different location, because he doesn't know what we know. The test is to see if we can see and understand the situation from Gabi's perspective, and understand that he's his own entity with his own perspective and beliefs, which can differ from our own observations."
Location: Pinefall High - Classroom 106
Phase: School Phase
Date: 08.09.1994 (THU)
Weather: Overcast
Miss Min raised an eyebrow a little at Alexstrasza's sudden burst of laughter... but at the same time, among the half-a-dozen raised hands, it was hers that she eventually picked.
And after listening to the answer given...
"That is correct. To be more precise, this is called the Sally-Anne Test, as designed by Simon Baron-Cohen, Alan M. Leslie, and Uta Frith in 1985. In the original test, the 'skit' we just witnessed is performed by dolls named, as you can guess, Sally and Anne. And instead of a piece of candy, it is a piece of marble that is hidden," Sae Min explained, deftly handing the candy in question to Gabi and urging the boy to return to his seat. "In this test, the so-called 'Belief Question' about where the person who has been away will look for their object is presented to those being tested. If they answer it correctly, that is, if they are able to discertain that the person would look for their object in the place they hid it, instead of where it was moved, it proves that they are capable of the theory of mind - attributing mental states to oneself and others."
Setting aside the basket and the box, Miss Min put her hands back on the desk and steepled her fingers once again. She leaned against the table with her elbows, looking with that almost cold, machine-like gaze over the whole of class, quietly passing by them all. Up close like this, the vice-principal of the school really set herself apart from her fellow faculty. While most of them were lively, friendly and even a bit odd in humorous ways, Sae Min was... more of an enigma. If anything, she felt more like a professional than any of them, but whether that was a good or bad thing, well... that was subjective.
One thing was sure though.
She couldn't have been more different from Mr. Oceandrop.
"One could say that in short, passing this test is a proof that the participants can understand that others may have their own beliefs that may not correlate with their reality, and thus act upon them. Acting this way may cause them to perform deeds that you might see as foolish, hostile, nonsensical or even bizarre. This ability to understand others and their points of view may be something that most children, and even some non-human hominids, possess... however, one should never forget that ability," Miss Min continued, speaking quietly yet so firmly the whole class could hear it. "With our own cognition, we may ascertain something as truth, whereas in reality something has changed that 'truth' without us knowing. So even we ourselves may act upon the information we believe to be right, only to have others question our actions unless they are capable of understanding our point of view. As 'object truth' of anything is hard, even impossible to know, dialogue between individuals is important in cases like this to prevent misunderstanding. Or to put it in mystery fiction terms... Whydunit is always just as important as Whodunit or Howdunit. It might even be more important in some cases."
There was a brief silence, and then suddenly...
... A dry ghost of a grin appeared on Sae Min's lips, barely visible under her steepled hands.
"... Of course, if someone were to act upon information they wouldn't be able to know, we might not even notice it or pay attention to it, even if that would be a mystifying thought in the truest sense. We are, in a sense, prisoners of our own cognition after all, and we might not even question it..."
She coughed once, and her face became impassive as before.
"In any event, there are many ways the inability to accurately assume or understand any perspective other than one's own may manifest - egocentrism being perhaps the most famous one," Sae Min continued. "While this continues to be a bit of a different topic from the rest of the lesson... could I ask you to name some manifestations of such situations? In other words, how can the inability to step into the shoes of other people manifest? Mundane life examples, something we can all relate to. There are no wrong answers here, and the floor is free - speak as you wish."
It wasn't long until Travis Gagnon, who had been silent for most of the class, grunted.
"... You mean like guffawing like a maniac for no reason in the middle of the class?" Travis asked, glancing towards Alexstrasza. "Even if nobody else gets why?"
Sae Min tilted her head a bit... but then nodded.
"In a sense, though that falls more in the realm of not adhering to social cues of the current situation. Then again, such can also be attributed to the fact that we can't always think of others and how it might seem to them before we impulsively do something."
Prushka
Location: Pinefall High - Classroom 106
Phase: School Phase
Date: 08.09.1994 (THU)
Weather: Overcast
Sae Min is a good teacher. That much is undeniable.
She's a good teacher, but... at some point within the past few minutes, the dynamic here shifted.
This place doesn't feel like a classroom anymore. I don't feel like a student right now, and she doesn't feel like a teacher. Rather, that glint in her eyes, the way she's watching everyone...
It's like we're subjects, and she's the scientist studying us.
Originally Posted by Sae Min
"... Of course, if someone were to act upon information they wouldn't be able to know, we might not even notice it or pay attention to it, even if that would be a mystifying thought in the truest sense. We are, in a sense, prisoners of our own cognition after all, and we might not even question it..."
Does she know?
That question must surely be going through several minds right now. Of course, that question inevitably leads to other questions. Like what the Oceandrop Program is doing here and why we were gathered up in it. Those questions are impossible to answer right now. For all I know, the adult before me is studying whether that 'prison of cognition' is possible to escape from, whether through understanding or through a certain dream spirit's intervention. And so, because those questions can't be answered...
Originally Posted by Sae Min
"Anyone else?"
It's best to ignore the bars around us for now.
"Anger," I answer, to her open question. "Fear. Doubt. Any strong feeling, really."
How can someone's ability to recognize other perspectives be reduced, even in an otherwise stable individual? That's a simple one to answer.
Yes, last night is still fresh in my mind.
"Being angry or sad is a problem of the self, but understanding others requires stepping past yourself. The human mind isn't just a logical computer; its conclusions are dyed in emotion. Being stuck in your own shoes makes it harder to put yourself in someone else's. That's why hindsight is 20/20: given a chance to re-examine a situation with themselves outside it, it's easier to draw objective conclusions and understand and sympathize with the perspectives of others."
Well, that's not so easily done. There are rituals, habits that can be formed, to discipline the mind for such situations, to stay objective and understanding no matter how you feel... but every person has a breaking point.
"For a real life example: whenever people argue and get heated up and make incorrect assumptions about each other, but then go back and come to an understanding afterwards, once they've calmed down and thought things over."
Well, it's simple, but... it's embarrassing, too.
Last edited by Bloble; September 1st, 2020 at 06:37 PM.
Location: Pinefall High - Classroom 106 Phase: School Phase Date: 08.09.1994 (THU) Weather: Overcast
Prushka is too honest. Should he praise her and pat her head after classes are over? No, she would not like that, and John Dove is not the type to do things to get himself hurt.
Sae Min is also an honest person in her own way.
Naturally, John Dove is not complaining—he is incapable of such a thing. If anything, honesty is convenient, right? On the other hand, Sae Min’s actions in this classroom in no way make her thoughts any more obvious. How much does she know, and how much is she aiming for here? Is this a calculated part of the Oceandrop project, or is she just taking the opportunity to perform her own research? For all we know, Mister Oceandrop pulled her into his philanthropic dream with the promise to allow her to indulge in her personal interests with an enviable pool of research subjects.
Well, like most things, it is of no importance. Sae Min wants him to do this exercise, so he will do it. He is expected to be a dutiful student, after all. Besides, she must have a profile on him, so she must know that, while eleven years ago he would have passed any number of Sally-Anne tests, ten years ago he would have failed them. No, the him from ten years ago could not even be tested at all.
The boy the police found on that beach that night, immersed in deep catatonia. Unable to see anything, recognize anything, acknowledge anything, not even himself.
Sae Min must know that the current John Dove is the result of ten years of developing self-awareness, of relearning so many things, of gradual recognition of the existence of a reality surrounding him, filled with other living, thinking beings that he is expected to acknowledge as such.
However, the feeling of otherness, of abnormality, does not ever go away. It cannot go away. Despite the fact that his rationality has developed to the point that he can recognize that he does not experience the world the way other humans do, and the he does not experience the world the way he did before that night, this awareness can in no way help him regain that “normalcy”.
It cannot do anything about that the fact that the world, and himself, have both been bleached by Her eyes. That he exists as a colorless actor on a colorless stage, performing alongside other colorless actors. That he can only recognize other people’s actions and emotions as expressions of that colorless performance and as cues for his own contributions to the play. That he cannot empathize with things that simply do not feel theymatter enough. That the only reason he broke out of that catatonia all those years ago was because he could not find Her in the lightless depths of his subconscious.
Only here, in this colorless world.
“Apathy,” he finally offers, thus beginning his contribution to the discussion.
“Putting aside the ability or inability to recognize other people’s perspective, there is also the incapability to internalize the emotions of others. It is expected of human beings to feel some sort of emotion in response to the emotional expressions of others. For example, a person’s outburst of anger may elicit emotions such as compassion, pity, even anger of your own, or just plain annoyance.”
A vague gesture of the hand, done for the sole purpose of not looking like a lifeless automaton spouting words out of its mouth.
“Even the act of hating or looking down on somebody else means that the object of that action matters to you, and so do their words and actions. However, without awareness, without acknowledgement of that ‘other’—without that ‘Theory of Mind’, then they simply cannot matter.”
That is right.
She is the only thing that shines truly and authentically in an otherwise drab, pointless world.
Yet, that Sunday, he chose life despite its pointlessness.
He acknowledged Miss Iburi’s stern wisdom, Alexstrasza’s careless brilliance and Elaine’s proud recklessness. But, that is not so unreasonable; after all, he too was saved by Her ten years ago. That is enough of a reason to acknowledge life, colorless as it may be, as something worth protecting.
If only that choice did not make everything so much more complicated.
His point made, John sighs to himself. It is the closest to a complaint he will ever show. Life, with or without color, is an incessant struggle.
Liana Skye
Location: Pinefall High - Classroom 106
Phase: School Phase
Date: 08.09.1994 (THU)
Weather: Overcast
---Ultimately, it was the sort of question that awakened her own sense of curiosity. In that regard, what interests Liana more than any potential answer she could come up with herself is the answers that her classmates provide, answers that would be, in some ways, a window into their psyche, how they say the world, or the prison of cognition as Sae Min was putting it...
Putting it like that... She wasn't too different from the teacher...
The workings of other people's minds were intriguing, humans each had their own perspective, and thus, each one of them was a different sort of puzzle, an enigma that not even the person themselves completely understands, but...
When Sae Min does it, it feels almost... Clinical...
Of course, it is perhaps to be expected that the faculty of this sort of school would have a talent for psychology, as the -apparent- goal of the program was to reform those that were too broken to fit cleanly into the society, but...
"..."
...Ah well, let the inquisitive eyes do as they like...
If she didn't put at least a bit of effort into her recovery, then she would never do so, thus, even while she finds the answers of others more satisfying than her own, she-
"Loneliness... Or I suppose a better term would be self-isolation."
-ultimately adds this to the conversation...
"If one is unable to look past themselves, life can feel isolating; being unable to understand others makes it difficult to really connect with others, and that lack of connection can ultimately manifest as decision to cut other people out of your life. For example, a certain person doesn't know how to connect with others, but they decide they want to do so anyway, however their attempts at doing so fail... They may then become confused as to why their efforts don't work, feel hurt by the act of failing itself, might even be made fun of for being different, and eventually stop trying all together in order to spare themselves the pain associated with trying to reach out to others."
After all, if one cannot look past themselves, then "oneself" becomes the only thing that really matters, and thus the thing that one will protect...
It's a common enough phenomena.
Once one is emotionally distant from others for a long enough time, it's only natural to physically separate oneself from others as well...
Well, desperation is also a possible response, do anything and everything you can think of to make others accept you, but...
That has it's own issues...
As does going too deep into analysis...
Exodus (Complete)
Even if the author is silenced, the performance is stilled and the actors leave the stage, the story will never truly end.
Regardless of the form it takes, as long as there are memories of it's existence, the story will continue on.
In a small ward in the heart of a once devastated town, life carries on as it always has...
Because of you.
Please, remember it warmly.
We'll continue to walk down this path for eternity.
She had raised her hand to answer the first question, but now it seems like this had evolved from being a simply quiz to an open discussion about cognition, perception and other psychological properties that come together with the human being. 'Vivienne Bianchi' would have been utterly confused by all of this and most likely started to stutter on how she thinks that examples like this are why it is important to build trust and understanding in relationships... but it wasn't 'Vivienne Bianchi' that was here, was it? A dreg of sorts, remainders that instead of answering with feelings and emotions, could only return a straight, factual answer. There as no answer left to be given... thus it would only be logical that she lowers her hands and say nothing, no?
To speak out one's opinion would be to attract attention after all. The quiet girl wanted no attention, not because she disliked it, but because it was unnecessary at the core. There was no ego to boost, nothing to prove... but then, sometimes being featureless is an equally distinctive matter as it is being outspoken. Thus, a degree of balance between not existing and being at the forefront of participation would be ideal -- many had already voiced their opinion and ideas... thus it wouldn't be too bad for Vivienne to maker her perspective known as well, wouldn't it? Bounce off from John Dove's statements...
"To understand others is... something that is important in the construction of one's social ties... but I think... that understanding someone else... and caring for them... are two very different things. Just like in the experiment... we could understand that Gabi will look in the empty place... but what kind of feeling would we have? Would we find it funny that he is going to have... a bad surprise? We will find it sad that... he has been tricked? Or maybe... we won't just feel anything. A lot of people like to say... 'you don't understand'... but I think that it is easy enough to understand people at times... however... it is much harder to care. In the end uh... social constructions are not only complicated... but also uncertain... and variable. That is why to this day... psychologist still study how we work... no? We have yet to find the answer... maybe we never will... but maybe that is better since... people would not have jobs for that anymore..."
Well, that was a lot from her. She tackled a lot of subjects, but it seems more like she was taking adopting more of a stance that 'not all things are known'... a classic matter she had iterated before. However, there was indeed a little bit of an echo, perhaps of a complaint from the emotionless doll -- the fact that understanding is one thing, but feeling empathy or compassion is another.
Last edited by Ayakashi; September 3rd, 2020 at 08:29 PM.
Alexstrasza Lockhart
Location: Pinefall High - Classroom 106
Phase: School Phase
Date: 08.09.1994 (THU) Weather: Overcast
I am magnanimous, am I not? Instead of eviscerating Travis verbally - or literally - I merely gave him a thumbs up and a wink, to let him know that I totally got 'it'. I had forgotten, for a moment. For a second. Even as Cesarina's torment runs through my ears, her screams of pain gouging out my spine, I do not break. I do not bend. I smile.
Sae Min is intriguing. Intriguing in a way that I have only seen very rarely. She is a person that does not seem to comprehend the scenario around her, although I suspect that sort of existential dread is something a person may want to ignore. This room is inhabited by madmen, the damned, and the dying. Or, more accurately, by something more terrifying then all three.
Magic.
The arcane, as it were. Sorcery. The sort of thing that lets you wake up in your bed with a scream after having your throat split. That sort of power is unthinkable, but to acknowledge it is to acknowledge your betters. I am arrogant, not delusional. Whoever crafted such an elaborate web is certainly my superior in the art. If I were asked to craft such a level of spell, it would drip through my fingers like the water of a river; time naturally wants to move forward. It is an imperative rule of reality. To trick reality, to delude it so thoroughly that it recreates itself...
That sort of power isn't in the realm of men and monsters. It's more akin to Gods.
I'm feeling a tingling rushing down my spine. Tap. Tap. Tap. This place, while it may be neither soft nor kind, is certainly exciting. The thrill of death, the stench of villainy... It echoes through this town like it has nowhere else I've ever been. From murderers to werewolves to vampires to scientists; what an eclectic and motley crew of characters attend school at Road's End. But those words Sae Min says...
Those words.
Those words.
Why? Why was Cesarina killed? Why is she a spark? Why is Road's End so thoroughly drenched in the occult that something like Prushka's scooter merely slips in with nary a question? Something like Mercedes' book? Even my own modest library is filled with works that would be questioned by any normal school in the world; purely because of their contents. I am attending a high school, and I brought a set of demonology texts. Sae Min's words woke me up, refreshed me slightly, and freed my mind from the shock. So I thank her for that. In order to kill, I must be clearheaded. Vengeance, while a noble (albeit misguided) ideal, can easily overtake one's mind, and quenching it in blood will end in nothing but misery. Even if it would be fun.
My finger twitches, but I give it a vicious glare. It ceases movement.
In this world of madness, of depravity, of suffering, the only thing that is truly understood is strength. While we may seek to 'understand one another', the answers that we uncover will be veiled in lies and deceit. The things we desire to know will be twisted and corrupted. Only through conflict can we emerge at this place of 'understanding'. With knives, with teeth, with spells. If you cross with another, that is the only time you will truly understand them.
Assassin... I wonder if you understood me through that fight. Or Elaine. Did you feel anything, when your knife pierced my throat? Perhaps it was simply a rush of pride. Or, even worse still, a surge of embarrassment for the incompetence of your foe. I wonder if I will understand a man who has no face, if I sink my teeth into his flesh as he sinks his into mine. Would that bring me to this place that everyone else desires to reach? These emotions of love and peace that all those around me spout... I cannot understand how they delude themselves. Road's End has no place for peace. There is no time for idle speaking, or lackadaisical days. The staff, the students, the townspeople... All of them are preparing for something, or have an agenda that is unseen. But what is it? What could possibly happen in such a dead end town to make it so important?
I was not alive to see it.
I was not alive to save anyone.
I could do nothing; not even watch. As if I was in an empty room, a darkened closet that hid my eyes from what was to come. I died in ignorance, and I live in ignorance.
Who is it?
Who is it?
Who amongst us will betray us?
I smiled lazily, tracing a rose with my finger across the desk. Honestly John; The deep inspection and dove-like piercing eye of your apprehension into the deepest cabinets of nature's arcanas, allures me. If, that is, I had no other attractive magnetic engagements.
"Perhaps you are right. Perhaps to understand others we must first understand ourselves Mister Dove," I said, my finger diverting from its curved path to form the rose's thorns. "But such understanding of one's self... Is it so easy to achieve? Are we not here because we are broken in some way, and unable to understand either ourselves or others? Or is this academy of lost puzzle pieces somehow filled with nothing but those who fit in? Somehow..."
The people I'd met flashed through my mind. The man without a face cackled in my ears.
"I doubt it."
The easiest solution to my troubles is the opposite of what John suggests. I should, realistically, carve out all who are unrelated to the arcane from my immediate circle. Cull any with no connection to sorcery from those who I interact with, so as to make my life simpler. And yet...
My left hand taps my face, and my right ceases to draw, merely lightly tapping on the desk.
I cannot.
I cannot let go. It is my weakness, my burden, my sin. I cannot let go. Of the past, of the present, of those around me. No, more accurately, I don't want to let go. I don't want to let these people who I care for fall into disarray simply because I did nothing. Simply because I was weak. To let those around me fall, simply because I cannot force their enemies to stop... That would be... That would be...
There is a feeling in the place where my heart would be, if it could beat. It clenches tightly, like a vice gripping around my soul, every time I think of leaving those around me to rot. I do not know what it means, but it is there, preventing me from standing, from walking out the door, from ceasing to 'be' a member of Pinefall Academy or my previous School. The only reason I was sent here, was for Gaap. I do not need to attend school to find him. It is merely a distraction.
But here I am.
In all honesty, Sae Min's concept is intriguing. To those around me, I appear mad. Like I live in another world, separate from reality. I am unable to relate to those around me in any meaningful way. I do not understand their troubles, their fears, their dreams, their worries. Are I not the prime example of this 'egocentrism', this inability to connect? And yet, is it even my fault? I come from an entirely different world to many of those around me. They could not possibly understand the hell I went through to arrive here, the bodies I crawled up to be that 'once in a generation' talent. They could not even understand what that level of sorcery means to wield. To 'defeat' the modernity of technology, one must become something even greater then it. To have the authority to dictate from up high that these things - elektic motors, aeroplanes, and moovees, are lesser to you. That is the heights you must strive towards to be considered once-in-a-generation. To achieve four names before the age of majority. Scorched-Earth Silent Black Impaler, and yet I am slain by an assassin, like a common criminal. Gutted in the dark, like a nobody. What a killer, really. She might even be better then me at that sort of art.
Maybe I should find her. I've got a new target, after all. And such an artist in slaughter should simply not be ignored.
in the end we will make thoughtcrime impossible, for there shall be no words to express it
#THELEGENDNEVERDIES
[01:05.15] <@Spinach> I can flash gang signs faster than Sasuke can perform ninjutsu and I rap like Medea's High Speed Divine Words.
Hisa Momoi Location: Pinefall High - Classroom 106 Phase: School Phase Date: 08.09.1994 (THU) Weather: Overcast
Ah...what a waste of time.
Since Elise disapproved of my plan, classes were hardly more than just that - boring classes that we’ve already gone through once. Most of the information wasn’t really relevant in the first place. While I never had the chance to go to high school, I’ve already acquired this knowledge and a lot more beyond this through books and with the help of Angelica. But even my situation aside...the purpose wasn’t really to teach us math or biology or whatever, was it? Though now...I wasn’t even sure if it had anything to do with rehabilitating us so that we could fit into society once more.
But whatever it was, what did it matter anyways, when it was all going to end on Sunday? Guess that must have been the conclusion that Elaine and Colt came to as well…
But what exactly is Colt up to? I could only hope that he brought Tris along with himself, but even then…
Well, I couldn’t blame him, a more or less ordinary person, if he couldn’t trust the lot of us here.
My gaze shifted back to my book as I flipped a page, but I’ve barely been doing more than just absentmindedly running my eyes through the words. Enough to comprehend, but hardly something that will stick to my memory without further care.
As the class progressed, the eventual signs of deviation did show up - although they could hardly be accounted to anything other than the differences caused by those who remembered. It would have been a good plan, if it was intentional. I sported the thought as well, to derail the class and direct the teacher to talk about something that could be more relevant, but…
“Urgh…”
A quiet groan was all I could muster, and after taking a quick glance around the classroom and the rest of the class, my attention went back to reading and organizing my thoughts.
In the end, even if I had such a plan, I could hardly pull it off in an environment like this. There were just too many people, and while just sitting here and maybe answering an occasional question was bearable, getting actively involved is too daunting of a task.
Besides...even if it wasn’t, I would still question if I really wanted to get involved with this person. A teacher with such an attitude when she’s probably only a few years older than me...Maybe if it was a conversation on equal standings, but I certainly couldn’t accept her in such a position, let alone to be her specimen.
There were plenty other who were more fond of this discussion, anyways.
Location: Pinefall High - Classroom 106
Phase: School Phase
Date: 08.09.1994 (THU)
Weather: Overcast [BGM]
A silent nod.
"These are all very good answers. As I've said, there are no 'wrong' answers when it comes to open discussion such as this... what is truly important is that you begin to think about these things, converse about them, and make your own deductions," Sae Min continued once there was a lull in the dialogue of the students. "Indeed, this is why I have brought up such a topic of conversation at the end of a lesson that has nothing to do with philosophy or psychology."
She separated her fingers, and made a vague - yet elegant - sweeping gesture across the room. Those machine-like eyes of hers scanned her students once more, but this time, it didn't feel like there was coldness in them. Curiosity, definitely. Intelligence, certainly. And maybe, just maybe, a little bit of sympathy. The kind of sympathy that a teacher has for problematic students that she wants to perform well at school.
"As much as we try, we cannot pretend this is a normal school, nor that you are normal students. That is what we hope to achieve by the end, but the journey to that point does not begin with us shielding our eyes away from our situation. Acknowledging what we may lack, and what we may have trouble with, is the first step to changing ourselves. Not forcefully into a mold that society waits from us, but one that we are comfortable with, and so are the people around us," Miss Min continued. "Stepping into the shoes of others, seeing from the point of view of others, feeling what others might feel... that is a big leap, and as said, it is something even everyday humans struggle with. By bringing up these examples, I wanted to make you think of that fact itself."
As it turned out, this whole tangent may have had a point.
One that she didn't start talking about in the previous week, as then there had been no dialogue that was spurred by the actions of the students.
"Anger, apathy, loneliness, doubt... and in some cases, ennui."
The first four words were directed at Prushka, John, Liana and Vivienne respectively, while the latter was said while glancing at Hisa momentarily, a dry, knowing smile hovering on Sae Min's face for a moment - as if she could read the girl's face well enough to understand some of her feelings.
"These moments often become emotions that drive us into situations with negative consequences. There's a reason why such feelings, across the world, are often thought as evil or dark. Indeed, even I'm reminded of a story about a man with such feelings in his soul... and of a manifestation, who spoke: 'I have a firm grip of the darkness in your heart'. Perhaps, it was meant as an analogy for such moments, a driving force we cannot see. Nevertheless... these may be emotions we do not want to, but they are also ones we have to face," Sae Min continued, directing her stare towards Alexstrasza. "Unless we acknowledge them, we cannot change them to our liking. And unless we can change to a shape of our liking, we cannot begin healing. Nobody starts out as puzzle pieces that fit together to weave a perfect picture - we must ourselves make the effort so that we fit together with those around us. However, we can choose how we fit, and with who. We don't have to take on the role and shape as decided by the society to be a part of it. We just have to see that those around us are people we are comfortable with. The bigger the chaotic picture we weave, the higher the chance that eventually the edges connect to the rest of the society and fit as well."
A silence.
A long silence.
One that was eventually ended by Sae Min exhaling a breath, and leaning back on her chair - her tiny form looking like a doll for a moment.
"And that's why I'll have talks like these with you, my students. Because I want you to start thinking of these things. Not for my sake, or the sake of this Program," she explained, sounding honest in her monotone coldness. "But for the sake of yourselves. As an expert, as a professional, and as a person..."
Her eyes were directed at the whole class.
"... It is my honest wish to see you succeed and become who you want to be, in a life you want for yourselves, with a future decided by you."
[SCENE END /// Move to NEXT Phase!]
Prushka, John Dove, Alexstrasza Lockhart, Elise Pelltier: Friendship Rank Raised!
Once again, the school day was over. With the last two hours having been taken by PE (which involved Mr. Hatou and his ever-present, boisterous attitude that seemed to smother everyone, along with volleyball for everyone), the attitude around the dormitory was rather tired and languid. Some people were lazily watching TV in the common room, though it seemed that most of them had decided to venture out. In other words a pleasant sense of quiet hung around the place, emphasized by the overcast sky outside and the small fragrance of rain that seemed to come from the sea. Perhaps it'd start raining by the time the sun had set, which meant that tomorrow might be wet and depressing. That might have been enough to make some head into town this evening, since those without cars might find it hard tomorrow evening.
However, that was only what others had decided to do. Everyone had their own likes and dislikes and how they wanted to spend their free time in the evening. Thus, while for some it might have been decided for them, the real question was...
Originally Posted by Sue Popplewell
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