Thank you for waiting. “Tsukihime R” has been successfully delivered into everyone’s waiting hands. First of all, please enjoy the main story of this new “Tsukihime” with an open mind.
I thought of frankly speaking about my current feelings as the writer but, more importantly, I unearthed some interesting documents so I decided to publish those instead.
During 2011, the development period of “Mahoutsukai no Yoru”, before “Tsukihime R” entered production, I decided to write down my impressions while playing Tsukihime for the first time in 10 years for the sake of the remake.
What places could I deem acceptable, and what places could I cut, given the coming remake. This was the first step of that trial and error, so please enjoy a writer’s melancholy in having to come face to face with a work made 10 years prior as he writhes in pain.
Kinoko’s Tsukihime Play Memo〜vol. Arc〜
▉Beginning.
・Of rather poor quality. I’ll rewrite it with this mood as is, but with the quality of 2010.
・That said, when entering the title screen I felt a simple yet unique charm. I ought to leave this as is.
・Title screen〜Game start.
Looking at the prologue, with content such as, starting from the beginning, starting midway in as well as “seeing a dream”, from the user’s perspective it might be surprising like “what’s this?”. → If I can keep it in mind I’ll give it some thought. It could become a rather important part of R.
▉Prologue
・”I began to feel, awfully unwell.”
This part is so much of an imitation of Kyogoku that it’s funny. Still, even now, The Summer of the Ubume[1] is a memory I cannot forget.
・In the scene from awakening~field, explaining a bit more about Shiki’s role in the Tohno family might be good?
Of course, though it appears to be a dream for Shiki, it’s actually just having had memory alteration applied to him.
・Instead of having Shiki dissect a tree, an animal might increase the amount of sinfulness but, that might be a bit grisly?
・Aoko’s explanation of the lines of death is su~per chuuni.
Let’s use a few simpler words, capturing the essence of it.
・Impression after playing the part where you first head towards the mansions on day 1. During the hospital period, depicting a young Akiha coming to visit might be good. Or maybe it’s just that I want a sprite of it.
▉Day 1.
・Departing the Arima house. Should I do it a bit more thoroughly? The include-Miyako-in-the-main-story-problem. →I’ll show some restraint.
・Or even, how about starting the game three days before being informed to “come back to the Tohno family”? I can depict a normal household, while also depicting that ‘something’s about to happen in the city~’. Managing flags seems easily doable too. But a bit tiresome?
・I’ll completely change Ciel’s introduction.
・If I turn the tables on the usual “her name itself is foreshadowing”, it’d be natural to at least have ‘are you half-japanese?’ be asked when ‘Ciel’ is introduced (or possibly, during this new scene, having Shiki remember her name when one of Ciel’s friends there calls her ‘Ciel’. Without speaking of her full name). I can put that here If new material and what not can’t be arranged.
・Still, playing it like this, Shiki’s characterization is su~per weak during the start!
・Introducing Arihiko. I felt his lines were basically fine as it is. However, I should be more careful with his word choices. He values morals precisely because he is the position of an outcast.
・The modern vampire incident is, what exactly?
・The scarcity of male students stands out. I'm being spurred on by the fact that Arihiko is his sole friend. Should I add one more person, or perhaps, cut Arihiko altogether?
→The cutting-Arihiko-problem. I’ll think over it carefully since it is a big decision in deciding the direction of R.
・Kohaku’s unwavering attitude is abnormal. The feeling of her sprite’s eyes not smiling at all is really great.
・From entering the mansion to meeting Akiha there are absolutely no pauses. Were it a biographical story, you’d usually be getting visions from your childhood, and getting all light-headed and stuff!
・Shiki’s monologue in regards to Makihisa’s death.
I need to be distinctly aware of Shiki, in contrast to Shirou and Soujuurou. Though he is virtuous, Shiki has, in terms of his sense of life and death, an inhumanness (or rather, a sense of emptiness) to him. As such, he views the death of living things objectively.
・Akiha’s “I cleared people out” statement.
It might be interesting if that wasn’t possible, depending on your choices. It’s like, Kugamine is in the mansion. It’d mean substantial Hisui route changes. Protect Hisui from the evil clutches of Kugamine.
・In Shiki’s room. Right, this kind of story is in some ways like that of a man marrying into riches! Kinda like a normal highschool student staying over at the royal suite.
・Hisui’s “Supper is in one hour” statement.
Super classic. Manor mystery. Ish. It’s like, here we meet the whole family at supper, right? Yet that not happening is what makes it Tsukihime.
→Kind of a Shounen Jump-ish idea but, what would you do if at this point one of the Twenty Seven Dead Apostle Ancestors were already at the mansion as a house guest? Feels like a new heroine coming.
・Midnight. Meeting with Nrvnqsr right now is a bit hasty. Since there’s no need to have fast pacing as a spelling point, I feel that I should add one more day until the meeting with Arc after all. It must be remembered that Day 1 is for properly building up the basis for “Shiki’s story”, without speaking of the vampire’s side of the story.
▉Day 2
・I must question not having any reluctance in carrying around a knife just because it's a keepsake. If a lot of more users are going to be reading, I need to keep in mind how to make these read as more generally logical. In the Arc murder scene, etc, like all of sudden it just mixed into the bag, “by the way, why do I have a xxx?”, or being made to unconsciously carry it, sounds about right... I want to solve this in a smart, brief comment.
・At the gate before going to school. The police are here. Bringing out a detective character for this police here is third-rate. Making it a new Association-affiliated character disguised as a detective is second-rate. Making it look just like Bazett since it's an Association-affiliated character is one of our terrible habits. I ain’t doing it.
・Arikiho’s goes out of control when it comes to Ciel!! He’s no different than Kinomi!! Let’s calm him down a bit.
・The monologue after spotting Arc. I want to add the feeling of the field of vision narrowing further. Though the scenery may change, Tsukihime’s keywords are still eros and violence. Once Shiki’s murder switch is flipped he doesn’t need to stay a good boy anymore.
・Looking back at Arc’s seventeen dismemberment, it's rather meek.
・Still, the BGM and story developments after the act did nonetheless amaze me.
・Shiki’s self-admonition after Arc’s killing. He says that “to kill a person without purpose is sad” but right beneath that there’s “the sin of ruining a person’s life”, so even though I think that part is followed up on…
→Day 3 it was not really followed up on. When asked “are you sorry?” by Arc during their conversation in the back alley, he feels regret towards his cowardly self, “why did I not denounce that cruelty when I killed her?”. On Day 3 in the back alley.
→Day 4. Properly followed up on when in Arc’s apartment.
・”Have I gone crazy?”
I shouldn’t so readily use the word crazy. I mean it’s prohibited terminology[2]. I should make it a euphemism like “a human who shouldn’t exist”.
・Arc’s dissection scene. I want to get across the eroticism of Arc’s body and blood.
I want to make the users taste the same feeling as Shiki who, in his abnormality, revels in dissecting a beautiful body. Sharing in that feeling of immorality, becoming complicit. As to make the ownership of that sin, and its toll, an actuality.
→This is also a matter which will greatly determine the nature of the game, so I’ll make sure to discuss it.
▉Day 3
・The keyword is “I have no appetite this morning.”
Thinking about it differently, Shiki having no appetite after having given way to his murderous impulse is an easy to understand presentation of fact. After the time-skip (the actions at night) not narrated to either Shiki or the user, and then the next day adding “strangely, I have no appetite”, a perceptive user can read it as “this guy, he did something again last night!”
・Akiha worrying for Shiki. I can never have Akiha’s face looking this much like a heroine’s before you actually enter the Akiha route.
・The scene of Arc waiting near the schoolgate. It’s an important scene, so I want to present it with quality on par with that of Mahoutsukai no Yoru…
・Back alley, Arc introduction scene. The lack of BGM makes me cry...
I ought to play Arc’s theme song (quiet ver.) here. Similarly to Mahoutsukai no Yoru, for the BGM, I want to make it an instrumental style, creating individual theme songs and arranging them according to the scene.
・Arc and Shiki’s conversation.
Was it just me who felt that Arc wasn’t scary enough? For the most part it should be like it is now, but I also want a feeling of tension that you’ll be killed on the next click...
→Come to think of it, at the time, I saw the first episode of Fooly Cooly after releasing Hangetsuban[3] and remember thinking regretfully that “this is what I should have done” when I saw the conversations between Naoto and Haruko.
・I’m at a point where I want an event CG for Arc sleeping in the bed... nah, not possible, is it? I understand I can’t spend any resources on this even at this point in time... We’ll do something with the presentation.
・Vampire lecture in the hotel. Well, let’s make it a bit more sophisticated.
Talking about “666 familiars~” during the familiar lecture, and then right after, Nrvnqsr and stuff, kinda hilarious.
・Being made to verify the lines of death by Arc under the moonlight. This is an absolutely necessary event CG candidate so, not to be forgotten. Without this, Shiki would not fall for Arc.
▉Day 4 (Arc)
・Shiki often speaks of himself from an objective perspective like “Tohno Shiki is~” during his lines but that’s no longer in vogue so, I’ll cut those to the best of my ability.
・I feel that Shiki’s monologue comes across too strong. I speak too much of his self-assertions (or rather, Shiki’s thoughts). I feel this unnecessarily strongly after the third person Mahoutsukai no Yoru. I must refrain from making monologues out of these presentations of life values as much as possible.
・The explanation of Nrvnqsr in the apartment. If I’m changing the enemy of the first half, this will also have to completely change.
・I got shivers at the chuuni-power of the Nrvnqsr fight. It is evident how this would indeed become the breeding ground that birthed such a large quantity of chuuni writers later on.
・It breaks my heart in a variety of ways but, I’ll transfer Nrvnqsr into the special category. For the sake of expanding the world, I’ve decided that making a lower rank Ancestor the obstacle during the first half instead of Nrvnqsr is for the best.
・At the time Nrvnqsr was a counter to the “stereotypical vampire” but now I want to go with the “orthodox” style of vampire as a counter to the “special type of vampire”. We’re going full gothic. Simple powers too.
▉Day 5 (Arc)
・I can’t think of anything particular to point out.
・But, if I had to say something, giving someone the impression that “they defeated the boss in the first half, returned to normalcy, END” won’t work anymore. If the doujin version gave the impression of “and with that the game is over” then R ought to give the impression of “from here on the game begins.”
→Maybe a development like Arcueid calmly being at the mansion works too? The story of a hopeless freeloader begins. Shiki, running about making sure Arc’s identity isn’t exposed, and a strange feeling of solidarity between Akiha and Arc who are both mutually in the know but deliberately feign ignorance.
・Ought I arrange for some fanservice in replacement of the lewd dream?
→Not really that kind of era anymore. It’s fine omitting unneeded fanservice.
▉Day 6 (Arc)
・Shiki, after having learned from the news that the vampire incident still isn’t over.
The monologue about how he "can't turn a blind eye to it" is a bit forced after all. I want to go with a version that is as convincing as possible to the users.
・Ηaving been given the definition of what a vampire is by Arc, Shiki feels righteous indignation towards them. He's headstrong indeed. It would be current to make him a little more subdued.
・The Dead that Arc is making the rounds to take care of. Arc sure is a menace from their point of view. It would heighten the drama of the vampire side if I depict one of them as a conscious person.
→If I made it a student it'd be really cliche.
→Well, maybe we can squeeze it in.
・Addendum to the above. It’d be nice to come up with an underground cavern where Roa's "coffin" is located, but if you're looking for something visually flashy, something like the city overflowing with the Dead would also be interesting. If one of the Higher Dead possessed a similar power to Liddell from Mahoutsukai no Yoru, it’d be possible.
▉Day 7 (Arc)
・Shiki senses danger in the fact that he can clearly see the "lines of death" in the morning.
However, with the things he's done so far, this feeling of danger isn't very heroic.
The toll of the situation - cooperating with Arc even though he might die - should be more concrete.
Something like his eyesight starting to fail or parts of his body going numb every time he cuts a line of death.
→Moreover, Shiki meddling in this incident also becomes more convincing with that in mind.
While Shirou tries to protect people as an embodiment of justice, Shiki wants to defeat the vampires for the sake of his own decency and precious values.
Shirou has no choice but to kill those he loves for the sake of justice, while Shiki can ignore his place in society if it's for those he loves.
Therefore, when faced with a hopeless predicament or an incorrigible villain, Shiki shamefully expresses his thoughts:
"I'm a good-for-nothing person at heart as well, it seems."
・The mansion in the evening, after returning from school.
A conversation with Hisui.
"Shiki-sama is my master~" - Hisui's devotion is cute on the surface, but at the same time her reasons for doing so are flimsy.
That's fine given that their relationship is explained in the childhood story, but perhaps "the reason Hisui serves Shiki" should be glimpsed here…?
・Make the explanation about the Mystic Eyes of Death Perception simpler. For one, in a way that doesn’t touch upon the Whirl of the Root.
・Shouldn’t I cut the plot detail of Roa also seeing the "lines"...no, since the fundamentals of Arc route must be retained, that's not gonna work after all...?
・There are simply too few characters. The world is small.
The breadth of scope can be expanded by establishing one new character per heroine.
I'd like to set up people related to Arc, Ciel, and Akiha.
▉Day 8 (Arc)
・Waking up in the morning. Shiki reaffirms last night's events. Kind of late for this but, this development of ‘the figure of the person who saved me last night kinda looks like Ciel is awful. Regret.
・Hisui's characterisation is too forced......Kinoko's heart is about to break. To begin with, Hisui's "you are dense" remark arose from Shiki going "if you've got complaints then say so". It's painful to realise now how I was trying to build up her character here through meaningless verbal exchanges. Come to think of it, back in 2000 this kind of characterisation was in vogue...
・The near-death experience on Day 8, common to all routes. I was fixated on this common point in the doujin version, but I don't have to do that with「R」. It would constrain the story structure, after all.
▉Day 9 (Arc)
・This game is incredible...having a date while the same background music plays at all times...! I'm gonna cry.
・Talking with Arc at McDonald's. The conversation is about how she doesn't want to suck blood because she would stop viewing others as people, comparing bloodsucking to appetite. Seeing as this is contradictory, it either should be taken as her "misrepresenting it in this way" or the content itself is to be outright changed.
・Humans do grow old, after all (in a good way). Shiki's philosophy on life in the twilit classroom is painfully naive in some places. I feel like now I can make him more persuasive along those same lines.
・The date with Arc, from the pretend play that almost became a serious act of bloodsucking to the attempted assault in the back-alley. Oh, that means that both Shiki and Arc are doing the same thing, biologically speaking. The me from back then is scary. I plotted that without realising at all. How dangerous.
・The narration about the Holy Church and vampires is good. I’ll break it up into as small sections as possible and spread it out over Days 4~8.
▉Day 10 (Arc)
・At this time Ciel disappears from school. The only one who remembers her is Shiki.
・Ciel’s abruptness makes me laugh. The scene where Ciel appears and explains things has to be radically changed.
→Thinking about it for a bit, there has to be a scene equivalent to this (about Ciel's identity, her being an Executor) before this point, one with just Shiki and Ciel in it.
→→Ideally, if I made Arc route itself a double heroine system with Ciel and had Shiki waver between the two of them, it would be grrrrrrreat.
・It doesn't sit well with me that Ciel falls in love with Shiki one-sidedly. At the time I couldn't set up romantic flags with Ciel so I made her a character that "falls in love from the outset of the game", but if I'm going to make it a double heroine route, she should be fleshed out just as fully as Arc. I won’t make Ciel a character who is "convenient for managing the narrative".
・The conversation with Arc after Ciel has left. I shudder at the fact that the gimmicks I employ in places like Fate and Mahoutsukai no Yoru are all used here. Did you mean to go all out here, Kinoko?
▉Day 11 (Arc)
・Nothing in particular here.
▉Day 12 (Arc)
・I’m foreseeing major revisions.
・Even if I keep the contents of the conversation, the ‘where’, the ‘who’, and the ‘how’ are all going to change in a variety of ways anyway, so I'll drop them for now.
・Will the final battle take place somewhere other than the school building? Or, if there’ll be a unified route with Arc as the eventual heroine, purposely sticking with the hallway might also work.
・I want to portray this sequence (Arc VS Roa), up until the last moment, to the best of my ability. I’ll really drive home her being the strongest being in the setting of Tsukihime and Mahoutsukai no Yoru.
→Let's do that in Ciel’s route. It's better to limit Arc’s route to being a "power-up of the doujin version". From the users' emotional standpoint, suddenly shifting to a higher gear is no good.
▉Arc route overall
・Common route, Day 1 and Day 2.
Back then, the plot needed “10 days to the start of the incident” but I feel that, even if not 10, some number of days are still needed. Aren’t the other heroine’s route starts a bit too sudden? Arc’s be as it may.
・Putting that aside, Arc route goes too far in its simplicity. I feel like I crammed a bunch of things in and yet despite that, there is absolutely no complexity to it. The Sasaki Shounen version[4] being so bold is because it layered in the parts of the other routes so brilliantly. Truly the work of an artisan. I should follow that example.
→Nevertheless, since the brand-new Ciel route is afterwards, maybe it’s alright leading in with this kind of simplicity.
・Someone who usually acts cool and collected, but really gets going when push comes to shove, the otaku self insert type - Shiki is more of that kind than I remembered. His differentiation to Shirou and Soujuurou is also a thing, so I want to make him a bit more Mikiya-esque. Not really making him elegant but at least making his tone of voice a bit softer. His edgy parts are fine as is. Edgy is good.
→Also, I will thoroughly avoid using expressions like “I don’t really understand” in conversations and monologues. The absence of self-awareness and unease towards the circumstances encroaching you and such are not really in vogue anymore.
→→I’ll get even more into him having chronic anemia. From childhood onwards: “It is medically unknown how I recovered”, “If I sleep I won’t have the strength to get up” and so on, basically with Shiki being told that “there’s a half in half chance you’ll die tomorrow” and him overcoming that fear of death, already used to the notion of himself dying. If the protagonist is going have that kind of view on life and death, then the believeabilty of the scenes of him agonizing over this and that regarding Arc’s murder increases.
・Rewriting it as it is now would be easy. I could make it at least as enjoyable as Fate/EXTRA if I do it like that. However, in case that I want to make “something that seems brand-new in 2011”, then there’s a necessity to change it from the ground up. That would then mean taking out about half of the things that made the doujin version good.
・An addendum after I played Ciel route. The reason it appears that Ciel was an awfully convenient character in Arc route was because despite the relationship with Ciel not being established, she’s still very partial towards Shiki. In her own route, Ciel is properly depicted as charming (for Shiki) so that ‘convenience’ is not felt. So, if I’m doing things as it stands, I’ve decided that Ciel’s attitude in Arc route should then be a bit more unfeeling.
▉Impressions after playing the whole game
・I’d like a ‘sense of wonder’ from the background art. Take it to the next level, make it flashier little by little.
・Skipping when doing a repeat playthrough is unsatisfying. And because of this “skipping past scenes you’ve read” in the opening, the early scenes required for each heroine’s plot setup become included in scenes that are “skipped”.
Can’t I somehow make it so that even in a repeat playthrough the “already seen” scenes become “something to recall while still letting them be skipped”?
→Simply letting the flowchart act as a guideline is good ‘nuff.
・I thought of doing a complete overhaul but, once I played up to the Kohaku route, I recognized that there must be users who still wish for things to be as they were.
I’ll make the Arc route into a simple powered up one of the “doujin version”.
And then with the Ciel route I want to try pushing it to the max with what we can do now as a “new version”.
▉▉▉
And that’s the Arc Route Play Memo from back then.
I’ve removed the parts that’d be spoilers but, overall, it’s the memo that you see before you. The file was created on 2011/05/17 or something, pretty spicy.
A memo of Ciel route and Akiha route exists as well, of course, but I’ll save those for another occasion.
Although it could’ve been completed in about 4 years, from there the development of FGO came in like a hurricane and it became long sealed away.
And then, the latter half of 2020. My work on “FGO” was given a break for half a year, so I revised this sealed away script, applied some corrections once more, and then out the other end came the completed “Tsukihime -A piece of blue glass moon-”.
In what ways has it been enhanced or made anew? I would be grateful if you could also enjoy those differences.
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Originally Posted by Ratman
