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Thread: Create A Singularity / Lostbelt

  1. #541
    不死 Undead The Archangel's Avatar
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    I am also wondering about putting either a Native or Servant Ritsuka in mine.

  2. #542
    夜属 Nightkin ThompsonContender's Avatar
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    Planning on the LB king to be ritsuka

  3. #543
    不死 Undead The Archangel's Avatar
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    Well that is certainly something I wonder how it coud happen. Ritsuka doesn''t seem the type but if pushed too far.

  4. #544
    夜属 Nightkin ThompsonContender's Avatar
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    It's in the way that Qin Shi Huang does it, he's doing it in what in his opinion is the best for humanity to survive.

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    I plan on a third reich one but that seems controversial..

  5. #545
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    UPDATE - Added Hina Keahi and Hina Kuluua to my Sixth Singularity

  6. #546
    不死 Undead The Archangel's Avatar
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    Don't let that stop you like I said in a post above, fanfic takes way those kinds of restrictions that official works have, where you have to be careful about public opinion. It is like some writer said where people make it hard to write villains when they can't portray "evil" because of trigger words like r*pe genocide abuse etc... AS long as you clearly write it in a way that shows that it isn't something you support I don't see why not.

    "It is one of the main reasons I like coming to this site, to imagine what it might have been like if there were no copyright, budget, feasibility or meta limitations to take in consideration(Like how they avoid OG Arturia Medusa & Medea, etc... | If all Heroic Spirits were available from the start | Worry how to represet/program the game | Involve Christian Myth without wanking it so as not to offend the public & other such problems) just let things go wild!"
    Last edited by The Archangel; March 29th, 2022 at 02:29 PM.

  7. #547
    不死 Undead The Archangel's Avatar
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    I always thought it was more singularity material the "Hitler managed to get a Grail" scenario like Indiana, & then you could have the "aryan" Servants dunk on the Nazis how much they hate their ideology.

  8. #548
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    Hi, added Leda to Singularity 7. What do you think of the Hinas and Leda?

  9. #549
    女王蜂 Nuclear's Avatar
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    Location: Paris
    Year: 1794 AD
    Human Order Foundation Value: A+

    This singularity began in 1793, shortly after Marie Antoinette's execution. Marie's childhood friend, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, had his grief over the queen's death amplified by Draco so much so that he wished on the Alluring Queen's Holy Grail for a "Marie who would enact justice for the wrongs done to her". The "Marie Antoinette" created by this Grail was not the one Mozart knew in life, but an embodiment of Mozart's darker desires mixed with the slander hurled at the queen by the people who no longer wanted her as their ruler. Perpetually boiling with rage against the people that humiliated and murdered her family, "Marie Alter" exacts vengeance by carving open every other family in France as a bloodsucker. Though originally centered in Paris, Marie Alter's wrath forced the singularity to expand, presently covering the whole of western-central France as a Human Order Collapse Zone.

    Chaldea arrives at the fortress of Vaucouleurs, where they see guards separating children from their parents. Mash is disgusted by this, and recommends they rescue the captured children. Her assault against the kidnappers is aided by an armor-clad Servant who introduces himself as Lancer, Vlad III of Wallachia. After setting the captured children free, Ritsuka and Mash follow Vlad to his hideout near the edge of the Jura forests.

    At Jura, Vlad and his associate, Beowulf, explain the singularity's history and provide Ritsuka and Mash with food and lodging. The calm does not long, however, as Carmilla and her forces manage to get the drop on the party, and burn the Jura forest to smoke them out. The party fight their way out of the forest and head to La Charite, as per the instruction of one of Beowulf's informants.

    At La Charite, the party happens upon the aftermath of a peasant rebellion. Marie Alter is present, and personally executes the rebel leaders' families in front of them before finishing off the leaders themselves. As the royal convoy clears off, the party is attacked by a berserk lone swordsman who mistakes Chaldea as a part of the French forces. After Vlad and Beowulf beat the rage out of him, the swordsman introduces himself as the hitokiri Okada Izou. He eagerly joins the party after Vlad proclaims that they're out to bring Marie Alter to justice.

    As party travels to Paris while dispatching the royal army's forces on the road, Izou and Vlad's brutality-- and the subsequent trouble it attracts-- become to Ritsuka and Mash negative examples of patience, which are reinforced by the fact that it is Beowulf's cool head that allows them to escape unscathed. Thanks to being immersed in so many battles, the group's compatibility rises phenomenally, with the experienced warriors Vlad and Beowulf helping temper the younger Izou, Ritsuka, and Mash's enthusiasm. Vlad and Izou get along especially well as comrades in meting out divine punishment.

    Things take a turn for the worse upon reaching Orleans, however, as a tip Vlad got from his informer leads the party to a confrontation with Berserker Vlad III, marshal of the French army. He provokes the group into open combat in disadvantageous terrain; this predictably gets the party captured. The troops then take Chaldea to Paris and imprison them in the Bastille under Berserker Vlad's orders.

    Whilst in prison, Vlad's informant appears and introduces herself as Mata Hari. Vlad is understandably irate at being so deceived, but the spy replies that this was Berserker Vlad's plan of smuggling Marie Alter's would-be assassins into the city without being discovered as a traitor. The rest of the party is surprised by this, but Vlad confirms that he and the Marshal are (begrudgingly) cooperating to bring down the monarchy.

    Mata Hari unlocks the jail cells, but discreetly leaves through another entrance, and leaves Chaldea to fight their way out of the prison. It is upon exiting the Bastille that the party realizes the full extent of Marie's regime, renewing their resolve to end her reign of terror.

    Chaldea arrives at Versailles with the Parisian city guard in hot pursuit. In contrast to the cacophonic squalor in Paris, the palace is quiet and pristine to an unsettling degree. Mozart's Requiem for Death can be heard throughout, though it soon fades once the party starts wading through masses of guards and vampirized nobles to reach the royal throne room.

    Upon entering the throne room, the party sees Mata Hari collapsing in an exhausted heap in front of a large crowd of nobles, headed by Marie Antoinette herself. The dancer had been deploying her Noble Phantasm non-stop to prevent Mozart from using his. Accompanied by carmilla, apov!vlad, and the gathered vampire nobles, Marie rises from her throne and convinces Chaldea of the righteousness of her cause: France's cattle trampled on her love, her family, her everything, so she will trample on everything they have in return. Vlad and Izou counter that she has far exceeded the demands of justice. Just as Marie realizes she will not be able to convince Chaldea to take her side, the room explodes into chaos.

    Chaldea initially has trouble fighting the vampire nobles as they keep turning to mist, but Mata Hari soon re-commences with her performance behind Mash's shield, entrancing the vampires and allowing them to be cut down. Carmilla realizes this, and moves to take the dancer out of the equation, but she is skewered by Berserker Vlad, who then takes the opportunity to show where his loyalties truly lie.

    As the battle rages on, Carmilla, Marie, and Mozart begin to lose ground and supporters. Izou then becomes overconfident and, against Beowulf's warning, launches himself at Marie Alter. Unable to watch his beloved die in front of him, Mozart takes the blow meant for the queen. Driven mad by rage and grief, Marie Alter inserts Draco's Holy Grail into herself to become Dia-Bolus Philadelphia. The beast then fatally mauls Izou, who laments his inability to bring divine punishment at the most crucial moment before fading away.

    Beowulf, the two Vlads, Mash, and Ritsuka face down the Demon Beast even as they cling to the last of their strength. Dia-Bolus Philadelphia prepares a finishing blow, but it never comes, instead being dispersed into a flurry of white petals by a hooded figure. The figure lowers her hood and introduces herself as Merlin, the Magus of Flowers from another world. Ritsuka recognizes her voice as the one that guided them back in London and Rome. Merlin heals the party before disappearing, saying this is as much as she's allowed to do for now. With their strength renewed, the three kings vow to protect the sanctity of Marie Antoinette's conviction to die for her country. They, along with Ritsuka and Mash, face off against and ultimately defeat Dia-Bolus Philadelphia, allowing Chaldea to retrieve the Holy Grail. Most helpfully, the Demon Beast's corpse does not explode upon its defeat.

    With the Holy Grail's removal, the Human Order corrective force attributes all the deaths during this singularity to the Reign of Terror.

    AUTHOR'S NOTES
    Bloodsucking Ancien Regime 吸血古来体制

    • The singularity's main theme is wrath (all-consuming rage or resentment) vs patience (bearing present evils with equanimity) and its main characters are Marie Antoinette (Alter) and Vlad III (both of them).
    • Yeah, I know, Marie Alter is straying off-script, yadda yadda yadda. If it helps any, I'd make her a palette swap costume of Rider Marie, which has the double benefit of not buttblasting Mobile players too much while also foreshadowing Nebusimpnezzar being a costume of Cas!Gil. Also yeah I know the French Revolution as a singularity has been done to death, so I opted to lean into Orleans a bit by going the Alien Space Bats route by having people become vampires.
    • The vampire thing was actually a secondary consideration; my first thought was "I need to make Lancer Vlad a main Servant" since he's been royally snubbed by both Grand Order and Extella. Here, I tried to showcase his relationship with Berserker Vlad, him taking up a mentorship role, and him fighting against someone whose legacy is similarly being tarred.
    • Speaking of roles, Marie Alter, Vlad (both of them), and Beowulf form a sort of triad. The reasons differ ofc, but they're all "monarchs who died for their country". This is the fact I wanted to center the conflict on; Beowulf and Lancer Vlad would have fought Marie Alter to protect the historical Marie Antoinette's decision to be killed for the sake of France, while Berserker Vlad would have fought her to definitively end the advance of the ill will that was tarring her legend.
    • Btw, the idea of having Marie going berserk in reaction to Mozart's death was a veiled reference to the movie Se7en. We're reaching levels of Higashide previously thought impossible!
    Last edited by Nuclear; March 31st, 2022 at 04:28 AM.

  10. #550
    不死 Undead The Archangel's Avatar
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    Just read the Hinas sheet, had to research them a bit, & it looks great really like the dynamic. What is the relationship with Quetz though? Also it helps if you paste the post link next to the request

  11. #551
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    Neither Hina likes her because Quetz seems obsessed with Lucha Libre and less caring about being a good leader, at least to them. Thanks for the comments. Any on Leda? https://forums.nrvnqsr.com/showthrea...=1#post3184062

  12. #552
    不死 Undead The Archangel's Avatar
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    Well I don't anything more to say than a nicer version of what was said to you. People shouldn't assume everyone writes with the same depth as them & certainly shouldn't assume people's feelings, it is a bit unfair of them to expect so much from someone who just joined recently & has so few post compared to their >5+k. Also even more so if you really are 13. Everyone starts somewhere & given those sheets are attached to a Singularity/Lostbelt I think you can leave the fleshing out for the story proper. After all your profiles sometimes don't seems that different from some of the OG ones.

    I also don't know jack about how to format/edit/stylized on this site, didn't even manage to add images properly even after following BB code instructions, so... my point is people so go easier on us noobies, I joined many years ago, but only took an active role recently & this AU might be my 1st as a "writer" in as many quotes as I can put it
    Last edited by The Archangel; March 30th, 2022 at 07:35 AM.

  13. #553
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    Yeah, I personally agree. Yeah, I am 13. I'll flesh out their characters in the written singularities very soon.

  14. #554
    不死 Undead The Archangel's Avatar
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    Good, keep at it, nothing wrong with doing something you like even if you aren't excellent at it. Looking forward to it.

  15. #555
    夜属 Nightkin ThompsonContender's Avatar
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    I need some help on my second singularity, it's taking place in Russia during Lenin's revolution. What do I name it?

  16. #556
    Your average edge/angst supplier BnEl15's Avatar
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    Knowing the inciting incident/divergence point/notable figures involved might help.

  17. #557
    夜属 Nightkin ThompsonContender's Avatar
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    Well we have PHH Anastasia, Karl Marx, Rasputin, Nicholas II (The guy with the grail), and more people not fully done it yet

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    Of course also Lenin

  18. #558
    Your average edge/angst supplier BnEl15's Avatar
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    Some Russian word/slogan popular in the era could work. For the subtitle... something something Tsardom, something something Bolshevik? Idk.

  19. #559
    Wyrd oft nereš unfǽgne eorl, žonne his ellen déah... Skull's Avatar
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    ^ Find some way to condense the phrase “В тихом омуте черти водятся” (roughly “devils dwell in a quiet lagoon”).

    The idea being analogous to the English saying “still water runs deep” and can be applied both literally to Anastasia having Viy but also metaphorically to the dark ambitions of the revolutionaries.
    "Here's a bangin lil' tune about takin' on The Man!"

    (Check out my Super Special Awesome Servant Compendium here)

  20. #560
    夜属 Nightkin ThompsonContender's Avatar
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    The Devil in the Quiet Lagoon under the flames of revolution: Rassvet peremen

    (How's that

    - - - Updated - - -

    (Also ritsuka is technically on Lenin's side for this)

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