Page 322 of 620 FirstFirst ... 222272312317320321322323324327332372422 ... LastLast
Results 6,421 to 6,440 of 12396

Thread: Create-A-Servant 3

  1. #6421
    死徒(下級)Lesser Dead Apostle Baron Magnus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2021
    Location
    Fantasia, Fantasia
    Age
    32
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    492
    Blog Entries
    13
    I didn't see a reason to respond beyond adding it as just that act I felt was self-explanatory. That said, you're welcome and I'm glad you enjoyed the sheet.
    Rookie Lorekeeper, Amateur Extraordinaire, and all around nasunoob.




  2. #6422
    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six pinetree's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2017
    Location
    São Paulo, Brazil
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    8,031
    US Friend Code
    326,832,196
    Blog Entries
    3
    Nah I'm gonna defend NINE on this one, dude just gave Lambda heads up about something they asked for. Literally no need to be rude.

    If you can't stand them to the extent that you can't manage a polite reply then just ignore the guy, geez.

  3. #6423
    死徒二十七祖 The Twenty Seven Dead Apostle Ancestors Kabalisto Koga's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2018
    Location
    The H/eart/h of Europe
    Age
    28
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    3,413
    Blog Entries
    4
    bit late but Sandman is really well done concept in general i must say the skills are really fitting in my opinion ,though at the Nobpephantasm have you described the sand itself good but the application of the dream world is i find missing Baron. I must say a really well done servant would be curious what would he think of heroic spirit servants that succeeded in making their dreams real as that would be interesting like onne line about the wright brothers and the dream on flying .
    Your verified Chikara-production Studios !

    Dont ship me with anyone unless i say so !

    When you wake a Dragon in his Lair...





  4. #6424
    夜魔 Nightmare NittyGritty's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2020
    Posts
    347
    Blog Entries
    2
    how can a thread be wholesome and toxic at the same time

    yes

  5. #6425
    死徒(下級)Lesser Dead Apostle Baron Magnus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2021
    Location
    Fantasia, Fantasia
    Age
    32
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    492
    Blog Entries
    13
    Koga: Thank you for the feedback. I didn't get into the applications because there are too many to count. If I did, I'd run well past the character limit. I mean... when you can manipulate peoples dreams skys the limit.
    Rookie Lorekeeper, Amateur Extraordinaire, and all around nasunoob.




  6. #6426
    Darkened Misty Metropolis Lambda-Nu's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2018
    Location
    Somewhere in this vast multiverse
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    752
    Blog Entries
    3
    Sorry, NINE
    The joys of being a Mommy

    Loading... Loading... Loading... Loading... Complete.

    Servant Database (v2.0)


    CHALDEA SECURITY ORGANIZATION: AUTHORIZED PERSONNEL ONLY
    Singularity / Lostbelt Database


    For those of you who'd like to see how far I'm getting on constructing new Servant sheets
    Upcoming Servant Sheets



  7. #6427
    祖 Ancestor
    Join Date
    Jun 2021
    Location
    Why are you asking?
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    1,894
    Blog Entries
    4
    Thanks for the apology.

  8. #6428
    هههههههههههههههههههه Kamera's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2019
    Location
    Hellborne
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    4,326
    Blog Entries
    3
    Taira no Masakado: Pretty interesting, never heard of this guy before, but then again my Japanese history rep is lacking. Also, I must commend you for the improvements in your formatting. He has solid characterization, but unfortunately, I'd say, the skill sets doesn't really fit his established concept.

    First off, for someone who is centered around rebellion, he only got Independent Action (a generic class skill) for something remotely related to it, and his Noble Phantasm doesn't really have any rebellion theme either. For inspiration, you might want to take a look to similar rebel servant like Lu Bu and Spartacus. I'm also curious why he's not an Avenger, given his NP and the fact that he doesn't have any notable sword abilities for a Saber.

    Lastly, one general nitpick I have with your sheets, I think, is that you hold back too much in terms of over-powering your servants. No need for overly fancy or overpowered skills (like i do), just go wild and give them whatever cool anime power you have in mind.
    Last edited by Kamera; November 18th, 2021 at 10:26 PM.

  9. #6429
    The smell of the lukewarm ocean and the chorus of cicadas RoydGolden's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2015
    Location
    Hitogashima
    Age
    56
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    13,082
    Blog Entries
    1
    "Apelles, Servant La- oh dear, I've been summoned as Lancer? That's scary, a powerless Servant like me would be much more suited to the atelier than a battlefield. Still, since you've been gracious enough to patronize me I'll do my best... Very well, this brush shall be your spear, and I humbly swear to paint a future where we are victorious."

    Servant Lancer:

    Appearance:


    True Name: Apelles

    Alignment: Neutral Good

    Alternate Classes: Caster, Assassin

    Armament: Giant paintbrush he wields like a halberd, leaving trails of ink behind every "slash". Lancer can also project elements of his paintings to attack with, like horses emerging from foamy ink to trample foes or Greek warriors clad in armor.

    Strength- E
    Agility- C+
    Endurance- D
    Mana- C
    Luck- C
    NP- B+

    Personality
    A shy and reclusive man who shows fiery passion for his art. Lancer is openminded to criticism but awkward around people so he'll often hide in his atelier to hear what passersby say about his work. While normally timid, he becomes bold when his inspiration is ignited. Once he sees something that he considers worth painting Lancer will drop whatever else he was doing and begin slashing his brush across canvas with almost maniacal vigor. This leads him to seeming rather shameless as he'll openly go up to beautiful women and earnestly ask them to serve as models for his portraits. Though he'll still get flustered if you point out how that could be misread.

    Despite disliking combat Lancer is awed by displays of divine power, finding them great inspiration for his work. When in dangerous situations like caught in a raging thunderstorm or even witnessing another Servant's Noble Phantasm invocation he will often neglect his survival instinct just to try and capture that "perfect moment" on a canvas. It was this reason he admired the King of Conquerors Iskandar so much. While Lancer couldn't bring himself to entirely approve of his patron's methods, he found nothing but beauty in how his boldness cut a path across nations while reaching for glory beyond the distant horizon. If summoned by a Master with strong dreams of their own, Lancer will be grateful to paint them splendidly to the very end.

    Lancer is unsure as to his wish on the Grail. Part of him wants to restore all his works that were lost to history and show them to the world, while the other simply desires more time to continue honing his art.

    Likes: painting, hearing what people think of his work, Iskandar, to spectate thunderstorms
    Dislikes: dealing with crowds, jealous rivals, scheming conspiracies, his works being lost to history
    Talent: painting
    Natural Enemy: Phryne, Antiphilus


    Class Skills:

    Magic Resistance- D
    Confers protection against magical effects. At this rank only Single-Action spells are cancelled. Magic Resistance equivalent in degree to an amulet that rejects magical energy.


    Personal Skills:

    Three Great Strokes- A
    A sublimation of the famous episode where Lancer came to visit the fellow painter Protogenes who wasn't home at the time. He announced his presence by leaving a line in extremely fine ink across the canvas. When Protogenes returned he immediately realized this to be a challenge from Lancer and drew a second even finer line over the first. Upon seeing this Lancer decisively surpassed his rival by splitting the two lines with a third impossibly fine one, putting an end to the contest.

    Those three lines were preserved for centuries where they were even displayed in the palace of Emperor Augustus as a testimony to the painter's splendid simplicity. As a Skill combined with the anecdote where he was said to practice by drawing at least a line every day this expresses Lancer's capacity to surpass the opponent by going beyond his own prior work. Precision of his "
    attacks
    brushstrokes
    " progressively rises as long as he's facing the same opponent, allowing Lancer to eventually overwhelm them in skill.

    Eternal Arms Mastery (Painting)- B+
    A Skill for one whose mastery of their art has reached the point of being unrivalled in their era. By complete merging of mind, body and technique, it is possible to make use of full skills even when under the influence of any sort of mental hindrance. Lancer was extolled by the historian Pliny to be far and wide the greatest painter of his era. Furthermore this Skill is strengthened by how the philosopher Sextus Empericus used Lancer as an example to illustrate what
    Ataraxia
    mental imperturbability
    looks like.

    According to legend once when trying to paint a scene of a horse Lancer struggled with depicting the seafoam the beast rose out of in Greek Mythology. Reduced to frustration he threw his sponge violently against the medium, only to find it unconsciously produced the perfect effects of seafoam. This ensures that Lancer's technique actually increases under the effects of certain mental interference, for absent his conscious anxieties and doubts dulling his movements he's able to guide the brush without any thought at all.

    Human Observation (Death)- C
    A mutation of the Human Observation Skill given to those famous for discerning others' time of death. While Lancer himself did not have this ability in life it was said his artwork was so realistic that a "Metoposcopos" (one who foretells a human's fate from the ratio of their facial features) could divine the date of death of those depicted solely by using his portraits as reference. This realizes in a unique form of
    soul-reading
    psychometry
    that enables Lancer to gain glimpses of a subject's future death by painting them. Upon painting someone Lancer can glean a vague premonition of when and how they'll die, that coalesces into accuracy the closer the demise and how detailed he was able to depict them.

    For Heroic Spirits whose deaths are already in the past this Skill works the opposite way by allowing Lancer to reconstruct the date and circumstances of their death through painting. Following the old adage that a person's death testifies to who they were in life this is a valuable asset for uncovering an enemy Servant's true name and weaknesses. Heroes famed for their manner of death like Achilles will certainly have their identities exposed by his brush.

    Lancer himself is somewhat disturbed by this Skill, finding it macabre and going against his sensibilities as an artist. Though he'll still make use of it when necessary. In the Assassin Class this would be sublimated into a Noble Phantasm that goes beyond mere prediction to outright enforcing a given target's fate of death through painting.


    Noble Phantasm
    Ekphrasis Keraunophoros
    Howl, Painted Thunder


    Rank: B+

    Type: Anti-Army

    A Noble Phantasm evoking one of Lancer's most famous works, depicting the Greek conqueror Alexander brandishing a thunderbolt above his head as a symbol of his descendance from Zeus. The thunderbolt itself was considered the most striking element of the image and the historian Pliny described it as so realistic it appeared to be arcing out of the frame towards the viewer. Literalizing that concept, upon releasing this Noble Phantasm's true name Lancer seemingly conducts the thunder of the King of Gods through his brush, making it crackle with divine electricity. Swinging the brush down creates the impact of a lightning strike from heaven that blows enemies away and can even damage fortified structures.

    This is a mere reproduction of the chief god's power given form through Lancer's artistic skill, yet in a triumph to his realist style of painting it's almost as powerful as the genuine article. As it also expresses the charismatic nature of one who ruled a vast empire this Noble Phantasm imparts an intimidation effect to those who witness it that cows them into surrendering before Lancer's unrivalled power. However invoking it significantly strains Lancer's Saint Graph as well as burning out his brush, requiring him to find another to replace it.





    So here's another sheet from me. Found the guy while doing research for my Phryne Servant and had him vaguely on my to-do list ever since. As usual comments and critiques would be welcome. Thanks for reading!

  10. #6430
    死徒(下級)Lesser Dead Apostle Baron Magnus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2021
    Location
    Fantasia, Fantasia
    Age
    32
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    492
    Blog Entries
    13
    Kamera: thank you for the feedback. I looked at the sheet and admit I'm confused. Not because I don't get what your saying but because I'm finding something I had added to the skill Divine Emperor is completely missing; The inversion of command spells. I always intended for that to be a feature of his skill set. Thinking more, I might add something else. As for his NP to me that curse should be it. I wouldn't say its the sole defining moment of his life but its the most impactful as that shrine is maintained even to the modern day out of no one wanting to test if the curse is real. Anyway, I've made the changes to the skill. As for the last comment... I mean I didn't notice? I do have one servant I wrote for a fanfic that... is ugly in terms of power. I can post that if you want. Note: it's Ravana.

    Apelles: This is a great servant. I like that he's a lancer the most. Most art servants are casters, foreigners or something else but you went and made him a lancer. I dunno if that decision or the complete lack of justification are better.
    Last edited by Baron Magnus; November 19th, 2021 at 06:03 AM.
    Rookie Lorekeeper, Amateur Extraordinaire, and all around nasunoob.




  11. #6431
    هههههههههههههههههههه Kamera's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2019
    Location
    Hellborne
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    4,326
    Blog Entries
    3
    damn, I didn't even notice he has a hidden 4th skill lmao. but yeah, it adds much more now. i'd even argue that that skill should be a Noble Phantasm. also, please do post your Ravana, i'm curious of how you handle higher power-level ceiling.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Apelles: Oh, I've heard of this guy before and always wanted to see him as a Servant. Like Magnus said, I also like that he's a Lancer painter. I assume the Thunderbolt is the reason he's Lancer. Overall he's great and as usual good job. If I had to criticize, probably it's that you tend to limit the servant's potential with the "he'll have this in another class, maybe" thing. Unless, maybe you do plan to write him as other class, I'd say it's better to fit it all in one go.

  12. #6432
    祖 Ancestor
    Join Date
    Jun 2021
    Location
    Why are you asking?
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    1,894
    Blog Entries
    4
    I too wonder what BS hax ravana would possess.

  13. #6433
    死徒(下級)Lesser Dead Apostle Baron Magnus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2021
    Location
    Fantasia, Fantasia
    Age
    32
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    492
    Blog Entries
    13
    Kamera: Your wish is my command. I present Ravana, Lankan King of all Demons.

    "So the drums of war sound again... I am servant Rider... this war is already won, master"



    Sources: Mechachap, Ghibli.Fandom.Com. Nine, Twitter.com. Cinni, Pinterest.com. Zunia Kinato72, Pinterest.com
    Class: Rider
    True Name: Ravana
    Origin: Hindu Mythology
    Alignment: Chaotic-Evil
    Likes: Woman, Gold, Worshipping the Creators, and Fighting
    Dislikes: Rama and War
    Talents: Power and Commanding
    Natural Enemy: Rama
    Other Classes: Saber, Berserker, and Gunner.
    Catalyst: A fragment of his chariot, some of his remains, or the Sword of Shiva.
    Armaments: Sword of Shiva (A), Pushpaka Vimana Armaments (B)

    "As you can see, my reputation should precede me."

    Parameters

    Spoiler:
    Str: A+
    End: A
    Agi: C
    Mna: B
    Lck: D

    "I am strong and invincible. So long as Rama does not appear, we will win"

    Lore

    Spoiler:
    The king of Lanka and one of the most powerful demons to ever exist, Ravana went down in history as one of the strongest existences in his time. He wasn't always, however. Once he was a wicked mortal demon that waged war against his brothers and took their land. As he did, he prayed and worshiped the three creators of the world.

    One day he claimed a relic only gods had, a Pushpaka Vimana. Flying the ship home to celebrate and showcase his total conquest of the nation, he was stopped as another was landed and balanced atop a mountain. Upset, he lifted the gigantic palace aloft, upsetting its residence. He was dismayed, horrified, and terrified when he discovered that it belonged to none other than Shiva.

    When shiva demanded an apology, Ravana offered all ten of his heads to the god as an apology. Shiva put this offer to the test, decapitating him ten times. Not once did he flinch and shiva became impressed. To repay this act, Shiva restored life and granted him the Sword of Shiva. Brahma and Vishnu also wished to bestow gifts.

    From Brahma he received divine protection that made him immune from any type of damage that could be inflicted by gods, demons, phantasmals, and even spirits. Nothing other than humans could harm Ravana with his divine protection. Vishnu granted Ravana a pardon for all the evil acts he had done. Their business done, Shiva moved his divine palace out of Ravana's way and he went back to Lanka.

    However his wickedness did not end. He continued to conquer using deplorable methods and eventually Shiva grew angry at this. However due to Brahma's protection he could do nothing. So he incarnated into a human form, named Rama, so that the job may be dome. Yet Rama did not kill Ravana. Immediately, at least.

    Instead Rama sought to settle things diplomatically. Ravana heard him out, seeing him as an agent of Shiva a god whom he highly respected... yet ultimately rebuked him. To add insult to injury he grew infatuated with Sita and sought her so he kidnapped her believing Rama to be too weak... yet when Rama arrived at his palace to rescue her he was caught off guard by Rama's might.

    Their battle was fierce and his divine gifts served him well. Ravana while protected found Rama finesse to be a match for his strength. Eventually the fight was decided by a single motion; A feint from Rama who switched his divine sword with a simple dagger and plunged into his heart. Humiliated that he died at the hands of a human, yet also impressed. He died confused on his view of humanity.

    "Rama was truly a worthy foe. I wish I had known beforehand... ahh, the fight we would've had! A glorious match to the end of time we could have committed!"

    Class Skills

    Riding: B+

    Spoiler:
    As a Rider he is entitled to this skill but he also is noted as having ridden the divine chariot Pushpaka Vimana which was pulled by Pisaca. As one might expect he has this skill at a high rank as a result of this legend.

    Normally, one could not ride divine beasts at this rank. Yet it says nothing of divine vehicles pulled by phantasmal beasts. Using this loophole he can fully manifest and utilize his Pushpaka Vimana without restrictions beyond what a servant of his caliber normally faces. His pisaca are also empowered by this skill.

    "My divine palace is but part of my might... yet I admit, it is my most useful tool"

    Divine Protection of Brahma: A++

    Spoiler:
    A divine protection that can only be bestowed by the creator god Brahma, there are variations to the protection dependent on the rank and servant. Ravana's is perhaps among the strongest of the protections he has granted, something Ravana uses to terrifying effect. This skill has entirely replaced the class skill Magic Resistance due to the fact this skill accomplishes what it does completely on its own, as well as the other benefits it provides.

    This skill makes Ravana immune to any damage that would come from a divine, demonic, phantasmal, or spiritual force. Only attacks from a human can harm him. However, there is a loophole where something with the concept of 'Human' can bypass this somewhat, dealing reduced damage instead. This skill is so powerful that even EX-ranked attacks do nothing should they come from one of the above sources.

    "My divine protection... my greatest asset. I will always praise Brahma for his benevolence"



    Personal Skills

    Monstrous Strength: A

    Spoiler:
    There are many anecdotes about his monstrous strength from a mere stomp creating a country-wide earthquake to shattering mountains. His most impressive feat is when he lifted the divine palace of shiva, a construct that acts antithetically to demons in normal circumstances without even winding himself.

    With this skill, for an entire minute he gains an additional rank of strength. For that minute grappling with the likes of even existences that are considered the strongest. However if he pushes past that minute he begins to burn prana to do so.

    "Is my strength so shocking? Honestly... I don't come even close to what I did in life... though that is the lot of servants"

    Mana Burst: A

    Spoiler:
    In life he was known as a king that used brute force in fights... however, there is a subtler truth to this. In addition to his strength he also utilized his immense stores of prana to enhance his blows. Supposedly, so great was his store that merely 10% was enough to devastate a city. Yet he utilized it not to enhance his barbrous fighting style but precisely manipulated them to maximize the damage to his enemy.

    However he has a far more terrifying application of the skill; Flight. In the legend where he kidnapped Sita, his flying chariot that was not Pushpaka Vimana was broken by Rama. Rather than touch the earth he supposedly flew and with a simple gesture beheaded the god Jatayu that gave chase. The truth is that he used this skill to accomplish precision flight and formed an invisible sword with it to behead the pursuer.

    "Yes, the decline of mystery and this class container restrain me so much. Oh, don't misunderstand. I could devastate a city still, though now it requires all my power, rather than ten percent."

    Personality

    Spoiler:
    Despite his reputation as wholly wicked and evil he does nothing to prove this beyond a few troubling character flaws; Extreme arrogance where he believes he is always right and everyone else is simply wrong, either a complete ignorance or disregard for the plight or life of bystanders and others, and a belief that all belongs to him.

    Yet there is a core idea behind this; Might makes right. Ravana believes and follows this doctrine to the letter. He will not outright betray or conspire against his master, viewing their summoning of him proof enough that they are mighty and worthy of his respect. Likewise any servant that proves to be challenging will earn his respect and he will stop disregarding their existence as merely fodder.

    When this occurs he ensures that any fight between them is purely honorable and he will do no tricks to try and undermine the enemy; rather if he discovers he's won in an underhanded way the it is highly likely his own wish is either that the next war they meet again for an honorable duel or simply to have the grail arrange that somehow.

    However for other humans to gain his respect is largely impossible as a minimum they must be capable of scratching him, something that 99% of humans will die before coming close to. Yet he does not hold disdain, hatred, or contempt for them or those weaker, he simply disregards their existence entirely. Nothing more than a footnote for him to move forward.

    Despite this he is not cruel. He is never noted as torturing anyone in his history or legend and even now he does not. In fact he seems to hold a special disdain for those that torture, often calling them weak for it. Yet even still, he does not hold hate. Contradictory to his nature. To date, it seems there is no one he truly hates. Even Rama whom he merely wishes to meet again so they may have a better duel, one where he does not hold back.

    "My philosophy is wrong...? How? Why should I restrain myself? Why don't they force me?"



    Interactions

    Spoiler:
    Master
    "Do not worry about loyalty, master. By summoning me and not dying, you are worthy of my respect... that said, since I am clearly stronger I will the dominant in this relationship, okay?"

    Sita
    "What a beautiful woman. What caused my conflict with Rama. However I will abandon my pursuit... I rather not disrespect the man that killed me"

    Rama
    "A wonderful man! A strong one! Oh, how I seek to fight him once more! Our battle will be glorious! One for the ages!"

    Kingprotea
    ".... Tsk. What an overbearing existence... yet I can't help but respect it. The sheer strength of that creature is respect-worthy"

    Robin Hood
    "A weakling but at least he did his job... if only it hadn't soured, he might've earned my respect"

    The Morrigan
    "... I rather not talk to her. I don't bother with traitors, even if they're strong..."

    Moowis
    "No longer tied to that bastard existence I see... free from it, you're a servant now? Well... you have a chance to free yourself of that curse..."

    Gilgamesh
    "Oh? King of Heroes? Then come, Hero-King. Slay me, the King of Demons. Let us see your might!"


    Vaisravana
    "Greedy? Me? How foolish. I cannot be greedy if I own everything... a fact that I've yet to meet someone strong enough to disprove..."

    Noble Phantasms

    Dasis Sakvithi Maha Ravana
    Ten Heads of the Demon King


    Type: Protection
    Rank: A


    Spoiler:
    A crystallization of a key fact often ignored about Ravana that does not show in his appearance, the existence of his ten heads. The idea that even if one head is killed he will not falter in the slightest. That to kill him all ten must be decapitated. After all, it took Shiva slicing all ten of them off before he finally died. It is a protection wholly different from his Divine Protection of Brahma.

    When a killing blow would be landed, instead he is decapitated. Then all the mana in the area is drawn in and utilized to regrow his head outright. The old head then burns away as it becomes the blame for the deprivation of mana. However if he is killed ten times, then he cannot regenerate anymore. Should he be killed in an area with no mana, then he will die.


    Devataon ka Udata Mahal
    Divine Flying Palace Pushpaka Vimana


    Type: Anti-Army
    Rank: B+


    Spoiler:
    The legend of his strongest chariot in his arsenal, the Pushpaka Vimana, is encapsulated in this legend. A giant golden battleship the size of
    a naval carrier plated in pure gold. It flies in the air and is piloted solely by Ravana from his throne on the bridge of the ship.

    He acquired it after his conquest of the kingdom of Alaka and was allowed to keep it even after angering Shiva. He used it to terrifying effect afterwards, with his only time not using it being when he kidnapped Sita and used a regular chariot instead.

    He can utilize facets of this by pulling out cannons of the ship itself to fire on enemies, manifest his throne and pisaca, or even simply the Pisaca themselves. The Pisaca number eight total and are as strong as E-rank servants, each being a difficult foe.

    Usually, he will utilize merely the throne as the ship itself is very prana heavy in cost while the throne and pisaca are not. The throne itself might fool an enemy into believing that it itself is the Pushpaka Vimana. However once they gaze upon it they will realize it is merely the centerpiece.

    The cannons themselves are B-ranked armaments and he can summon a number of them at a time. Often he uses it to limit the movements of his enemies and obliterate weak foes he encounters.

    However these are mere facets of the real divine palace. A palace that is massive. When fully manifested he sits upon the throne and uses his own prana to power the behemoth, allowing it to fly and fire its cannons of which there are at least 20 on the ships sides and deck. If he chooses the utilize Pisaca then the mobility of the fortress improves, going from a mere 5 knots to between 10 and 30 knots.

    However the ship itself does have defenses. Firstly, there is a bounded field inside that rejects any presence not Ravana himself, akin to a rejection of the planet. Servants with at least B-rank protections can ignore this effect. However secondly is that the ship itself cannot be damaged except by attacks equal to B-rank or higher. Even then, these are grazing wounds and true structural damage requires either constant barrages of this caliber or A+ and above attacks.

    Yet for all its power there are severe flaws. Firstly, if Ravana has an inadequate master then he cannot utilize the full manifestation of Pushpaka Vimana at all. Secondly, an average master even with a command spell can only manifest the ship for no more than 5 minutes. However with a high quality master and a command spell he can utilize it for up to fifteen minutes.

    However there are ways to mitigate the prana cost. Simply he can choose to exempt certain factors. The bounded field can be unmanifested which reduces the cost significantly. He can choose to manifest less cannons and less Pisaca. If he were to manifest half of each and no bounded field, then a lacking master might be able to support a minute of this noble phantasm.




    "Behold, my divine chariot. Behold and weep oh lowly mortals for your judgment hath come"


    So yeah. Not much is different from how I wrote him. I merely altered some things with my understanding of how things in nasuverse work. It was actually nice that he can mostly work in nasuverse even though I wrote him for a somewhat different setting that used servants.
    Last edited by Baron Magnus; November 19th, 2021 at 10:45 AM.
    Rookie Lorekeeper, Amateur Extraordinaire, and all around nasunoob.




  14. #6434
    Grand Recorder DelRey's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2020
    Location
    Lost in Ambition
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    3,685
    Blog Entries
    6
    Cool lancer royd! I will always appreciate when artists of all kinds are not a simple caster. Getting creative with the tools of them is what I like the most. Making him a Lancer with the FC makes it obvious to me that he should be one even before seeing his NP. The application of the skills are the best part of it. I will probably rip off one of them in a future sheet.
    my criticism is the same as last time with your Foreigner.
    pictures.
    I am not sure this can be applied here tho. Are the two mentioned works still around?

    Quote Originally Posted by Kamera View Post
    Apelles: ... If I had to criticize, probably it's that you tend to limit the servant's potential with the "he'll have this in another class, maybe" thing. Unless, maybe you do plan to write him as other class, I'd say it's better to fit it all in one go.
    Kinda agree and disagree. Royd made several versions of certain figures, i mean he has 5 cains i believe. But yeah not all get this treatment.
    If you think there is enough material to warrant a completely new sheet, then continue what you are doing. But if you only have a few ideas what would be different, I think what Master of Chaos likes to do is the coolest method. A spoiler text with the skills they would have in the other class.


    As a sidenote, sometimes I wonder if we throw too much possible alternative classes around. I mean when are they warranted? are they reserved for names of bigger stature and such?
    "Let's see the color of your coin, my friend."



    Behold my vault of Heroes.
    Where the Heavens and the Abyss breath the Music of Humanity.


    The King's duty is to provide. And provide, I shall.
    University of Formatting | Gallery of Potential | Memorandum of the Extra Class Kings

    Our Kingdom will grow. And we shall know each citizen.
    Create-a-Servant 4 soon.

  15. #6435
    死徒(上級)Greater Dead Apostle Spammin Spiff's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2020
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    528
    Well, with all servants, I feel like they depend on how well known they are for doing things that would befit the class. For example, for my Samuel sheet I did a while back, I chose two classes that he could possibly appear as if I remember correctly, being Ruler and Caster (with Caster being the one I did). I feel those both make sense since as a Caster he embodies the mentor prophet figure, much like Merlin; on the other hand Ruler would make sense for him due to not only being considered the last Biblical Judge by some, but also due to the fact that he served for God rather than himself.
    To compare this to other things (not to knock any of you who do this because I think some sheets that do this are really cool), if someone were to let's say make an artist servant qualify for Archer or something like that, unless they had something in their legend that leaves them being known for shooting or throwing something, either figuratively to literally (though not too loose figuratively, they would not actually qualify for that class.

  16. #6436
    祖 Ancestor
    Join Date
    Jun 2021
    Location
    Why are you asking?
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    1,894
    Blog Entries
    4
    Ravana: His divine protection of Brahma seems way too powerful to be a mere skill and should be a noble phantasm. His strength stat should have be A+ At least due to his monstrous strength. Shouldn’t his sword of shiva be a noble phantasm due to it being a divine construct?

  17. #6437
    هههههههههههههههههههه Kamera's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2019
    Location
    Hellborne
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    4,326
    Blog Entries
    3
    Ravana: Pretty cool. I particularly like his version of Vimana. He sounds pretty strong alright, but unfortunately I think his power level comes off as somewhat one-dimensional. He still suffer from the same problems I've pointed out. His skill sets just way too generic, I think adding a unique spin to these skills are really important, especially for well known figures likes him. His first NP is also just a glorified Battle Continuation honestly, and his Protection of Brahma feels like it should be an NP instead. Overall, there's still a lot to improve on this one. Still a solid character, it's just that the overall concept is lacking. Most importantly though, how does he not have a line for his elder brother (sister), my Vaisravana smh.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Quote Originally Posted by DelRey View Post
    my criticism is the same as last time with your Foreigner.
    pictures.
    I am not sure this can be applied here tho. Are the two mentioned works still around?
    Yeah no, kind of hard to include paintings that no longer exist.

  18. #6438
    死徒(下級)Lesser Dead Apostle Baron Magnus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2021
    Location
    Fantasia, Fantasia
    Age
    32
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    492
    Blog Entries
    13
    Nine: To be clear, this is the original version that i used in the fanfic and am still using until I finish writing. Like, this was basically made after the morrigan V1. that said i can share some of the thoughts from when I first wrote it; first the divine protection replaces magic resistance wholesale so if a human uses magecraft he can't really do much other than try to power through it. There's also the fact that technically the skill does belong to others its just Ravana's that's so powerful. For example Arunasura's would negate the damage from any two-legged or four-legged beings. Finally, in regards to the sword, not really. There's no mention anywhere that it's anything more than an unbreakable sword and so the thought is that it simply is non-functional beyond that limited use for Ravana. It's pretty much like Mordred and Clarent without the fact that Clarent boosts her mana burst. Also, made the change to his strength parameter. That said, if I remake the sheet I will definitely use some of the things you pointed out to refine the sheet as I do agree regarding that protection being a NP and there'll be way more thought put into him beyond.

    Kamera: Going to edit to reply. This Ravana is from very early on when I made sheets. If I remember right I made him like a week after i finished the morrigan version 1 (which funny that was made because I was using her too) and needed him for something going on. That said, when I get around to his rewrite i can say he'll definitely be different. After Taira I feel way more confident about writing unique skills. I can't say all of the generic ones will vanish, as sometimes I find that a generic accomplishes what I want out of a servant (Mana Burst seriously does a lot of what he does in legend like literally flying autonomously and beheading a god with barely a thought). As for noble phantasms... how do I put this... ten heads is weaker than brahma's protection and because of that I do now feel that they should be switched. I didn't feel that back then but I do now. Actually forgot to mention that his one-dimension in this iteration... can't say it's intentional but when written I intended him to be a sort of massive wall.
    Last edited by Baron Magnus; November 19th, 2021 at 11:17 AM.
    Rookie Lorekeeper, Amateur Extraordinaire, and all around nasunoob.




  19. #6439
    祖 Ancestor
    Join Date
    Jun 2021
    Location
    Why are you asking?
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    1,894
    Blog Entries
    4
    Thanks for the response.

  20. #6440
    هههههههههههههههههههه Kamera's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2019
    Location
    Hellborne
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    4,326
    Blog Entries
    3
    I'll be looking forward to that reworked Ravana

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •