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Thread: Create-A-Servant 3

  1. #2121
    死徒二十七祖 The Twenty Seven Dead Apostle Ancestors Dragolord09's Avatar
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    So just to check Vance, this latest sheet is about Alena Arzamasskaia, right?

  2. #2122
    リビングデッド Living Dead Vance's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dragolord09 View Post
    So just to check Vance, this latest sheet is about Alena Arzamasskaia, right?
    Yeah.

  3. #2123
    吸血鬼 Vampire DelRey's Avatar
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    Tecun Uman: i feel like so many sheets were made genderbent just because the lack of decent art of men. and if there are men they dont look like you want them to. I had to change my Freud sheet back then because having a beard as a man seems to be a cardinal sin in the art community.
    While i like the concept of the first NP, it strikes me as contradictory. Her mistake is now her strength seems to contradict the logic of weaknesses of Servants. At the very least i would have added that while she is a natural enemy of the Rider class, they are to her as well.
    the rest is well thought out and fits her legend.

    Russian Joan:
    Gilles is pleased to welcome another girl into his imagined harem. I guess Marksmanship isnt a skill, because it just focuses on guns/rifles and doesnt include bows? I like the no-incantation-effect based on her anecdote how she died. else a straight forward sheet
    Last edited by DelRey; January 19th, 2021 at 07:36 AM.

  4. #2124
    妄念 Kamerad's Avatar
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    I-I will do my best!
    So, please... please behave!

    "Please... follow my i-instructions, a-and I-I’m sure you’ll have no problem!"





    House, furious storm of heaven and earth, battering its enemies; the prison, jail of the gods, august throat of heaven and earth! House, a pitfall waiting for the evil one; it makes the wicked tremble! House, a net whose fine meshes are skillfully woven, which gathers up people as its booty! House, which keeps an eye on the just and on evildoers; no one wicked can escape from its grasp. House, river of the ordeal which leaves the just ones alive, and chooses the evil ones! Grand house, the prison, house of capital offences, which imposes punishment! House, which chooses the righteous and the wicked; An has made its name great! House, surveying heaven and earth, a net spread out! No evildoer can escape its grasp, as it drags the enemy around.

    Nungal, its lady, the powerful goddess whose aura covers heaven and earth, resides on its great and lofty dais. Having taken a seat in the precinct of the house, she controls the Land from there. She listens to the king in the assembly and clamps down on his enemies; her vigilance never ends.



    An has determined a fate for me, the lady; I am the daughter of An. Enlil too has provided me with an eminent fate, for I am his daughter-in-law. The gods have given the divine powers of heaven and earth into my hands.

    My own mother, Ereshkigala, has allotted to me her divine powers. I have set up my august dais in the nether world, the mountain where Utu rises. I am the goddess of the great house, the holy royal residence. I speak with grandeur to Inana, I am her heart's joy. I assist Nintud at the place of child-delivery; I know how to cut the umbilical cord and know the favourable words when determining fates. I am the lady, the true stewardess of Enlil; he has heaped up possessions for me. The storehouse which never becomes empty is mine.



    Mercy and compassion are mine. I frighten no one. I hold the tablet of life in my hand and I register the just ones on it. The evildoers cannot escape my arm; I learn their deeds. All countries look to me as to their divine mother. I temper severe punishments; I am a compassionate mother. I cool down even the angriest heart, sprinkling it with cool water. I calm down the wounded heart; I snatch men from the jaws of destruction.

    My house is built on compassion; When someone has been brought into the palace of the king and this man is accused of a capital offence, my chief prosecutor, Nindimgul, stretches out his arm in accusation. He sentences that person to death, but he will not be killed; he snatches the man from the jaws of destruction and brings him into my house of life and keeps him under guard. . He will be listening for snakes and scorpions in the darkness of the house. My house gives birth to a just person, but exterminates a false one. Since there are pity and tears within its brick walls, and it is built with compassion, it soothes the heart of that person, and refreshes his spirits.



    U-um, that’s quite e-enough! P-please do not continue! It’s too embarrassing! … Maybe I.. should have sent that smug poet who composed that hymn to my Mother after all...

    I… I still have much to learn, I am yet to be as confident as Aunt Inanna, or as capable as Mother Ereshkigal. But… but! As long you trust and continue to rely on me, I will give it my best! N-now… now…

    -- Listen, foul criminals, disease upon the land, bringer of destruction and grief to the land! Surrender to your fate, and you shall know compassion; escape, and my chains shall follow you to the ends of the world; but defy me and the raging storms of Inanna and Ereshkigal shall rain judgement from the heavens and earth!



    Class: Lancer
    True Name: Nungal
    Gender: Female
    Alignment: Lawful Evil
    Origin: Sumerian Mythology
    Attribute: Sky

    Daughter of Ereshkigal and Anu, Manungal was the Goddess of Prison who ruled over the Mountain Palace of Ekur, which serves as a hub that connects the realm of Heaven, Earth and the Underworld. She was specifically tasked as the warden who administers the correctional facility that judges both men and gods.

    Parameters:
    STR: A
    END: B
    AGI: D
    MGI: C
    LCK: A+
    NP: A

    Class Skills:
    Magic Resistance: A
    Her divine blood and authority enables her to cancel practically all modern magecraft.

    Personal Skills:
    Goddess’ Divine Core: EX
    Born of the Great Mother Ereshkigal and the Sky Father Anu, Lancer is a full fledged goddess with the absoluteness of mind and body, whose figure would remain unchanged.

    Treasured Great Crown: A
    Authority entrusted by Enlil and Ereshkigal, described as "the divine power of heaven and earth". It can be said to be a mixture of Sky and Netherworld Authorities, a proof of the gods’ trust and her capability. In particular, it reflects her possession of the Tablet of Life and thus is oriented towards modifying a person's fate.

    Chains of Ekur: A+
    A version of Mana Burst applied to the utilization of the chained scythe that symbolizes Lancer's administration over the divine prison facility of Ekur. It specializes in catching criminals and preventing anyone from escaping a designated territory. It can be said to be prototype version of "The Chains of Heaven'' which is effective on both gods and men, scaling instead with the severity of the crimes one has committed, especially those with Chaotic and Evil alignments.

    Warden of Reincarnation: EX
    Lancer's role in the Great House of Ekur can be considered to be the exact opposite of what a psychopomp is traditionally given. She is the warden and judge that oversees the rebirth of humans from the underworld. She is responsible for pacifying angry souls, giving mercy to weeping souls and giving the hope of resurrection to benevolent souls.

    Noble Phantasms:
    Ekur Ikigal Egula
    House of Misdeed Where the Storms of Heaven and Earth Collides
    Type: Anti-Mountain
    Rank: A++
    Ekur. The divine court of Enlil of which Lancer is given absolute authority over. It is a mountainous palace which connects to both the Underworld and the Heavenly realms of the gods, serving as a correctional facility for both gods and men. As a Noble Phantasm it serves as a physical surveillance network structure that transforms an area into a "tri-realm prison" where escape by any means is rendered impossible.

    Throwing the surveillance chain net Birtum into the sky, it expands like a web, encompassing the atmosphere, and entrenches itself into the ground, reaching into the bellows of earth, thus it covers all the heaven, earth and underworld. Additionally, by invoking its true name and calling upon the wrath of Ishtar in heaven above and Ereshkigal in the netherworld below to punish all the criminals within, it is possible to weaponize the structure by compressing it, crushing everything inside with the force as if the three worlds crashing into each other.

    Imnam Tila
    The Tablet of Life
    Type: Anti-Unit
    Rank: EX
    The Tablet of Life. An almighty artifact copied from the Tablet of Destinies possessed by Enlil and later Marduk. The original tablet is the symbol of omnipotence and absolute rule over cosmos. Compared to that, this tablet is vastly inferior, but nonetheless it still retains the absoluteness in its effect. In essence, it grants Lancer the authority of "destiny alteration", which is vital for her work as the Warden of Reincarnation.

    For those whose soul is just, Lancer highlights their destiny and helps them ascend into the realm of gods. For those whose souls are flawed as most humans are, Lancer assists their destiny and helps them return to the world of humans. For those who had committed unspeakable crimes deserving of death, Lancer removes their destiny from the tablet and sends them to his Mother's Netherworld. This tablet is also the instrument used to divide and limit the Authorities of the outlawed gods such as the ones her mother encountered.
    Last edited by Kamerad; January 19th, 2021 at 11:44 AM.

  5. #2125
    Lost in Paradise RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DelRey View Post
    Tecun Uman: i feel like so many sheets were made genderbent just because the lack of decent art of men. and if there are men they dont look like you want them to. I had to change my Freud sheet back then because having a beard as a man seems to be a cardinal sin in the art community.
    While i like the concept of the first NP, it strikes me as contradictory. Her mistake is now her strength seems to contradict the logic of weaknesses of Servants. At the very least i would have added that while she is a natural enemy of the Rider class, they are to her as well.
    the rest is well thought out and fits her legend.
    Yeah, it is a case where her weakness/regret from life turns into an NP. In my defense there are cases of that happening in canon, like Shuten's sake. Mainly I just liked the idea though.

  6. #2126
    リビングデッド Living Dead Vance's Avatar
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    "Greetings, I am Rider. Please ignore this hopeless man, he's useless in everything but combat."
    "That's a bit mean."

    True Name: Deborah and Barak
    Class: Rider
    Alt. Class: Caster, Assassin (Jael), Ruler
    Alignment: Lawful Good/True Neutral
    Region: Israel
    Source: The Bible
    Armament: Sword

    Parameters:
    Strength: D/C
    Endurance: D/C
    Agility: D/B
    Mana: A+/D
    Luck: B/C-

    Class Skills

    Magic Resistance A
    Grants protection against magical effects. Differing from the Resistance effect that merely rejects Magical Energy, this ability cancels the spells altogether. Cancel spells of A-Rank or below, no matter what High-Thaumaturgy it is. In practice, the Servant is untouchable to modern magi, so it would not be an exaggeration to title the Servant a "Magus Killer".

    Riding A
    A Class Skill of Rider and Saber class Servants, denoting the ability to ride mounts and vehicles. All vehicles and all creatures but those of Phantasmal Beast and Divine Beast-rank can be used as mounts. This rank is high enough to have an aptitude for the Rider Class.

    "I am quite handy with a chariot."
    "Wait, you are? Huh, guess I should've let you drive the chariot too."
    "And let you just hang about being useless? Not a chance."


    Personal Skills

    Implacable Charisma A
    A variation of the Charisma for those who stern countenance and unyielding words cannot be dismissed. Also grants boosts to one's mental resistance. Given her relatively aloof demeanor, she frequently used this cultivated skill when dealing with those who consulted her while she was "on the job".
    "I can attest that she has quite the tongue on her."
    "What was that?"
    "Nothing."

    Judge's Assurance B++
    A skill representing the confidence that Rider brought to assure an inevitable victory against the invading army. It currently acts as parameter booster, raising all stats except Mana, and reducing Luck, by one. In her lifetime, Rider had inspired supreme confidence that the army representing the twelve tribes will be victorious over the invading enemy led by Sisera. However, the leading commander wanted her at his side. For this, she said that the finishing will go to a woman.

    Prophetess of the Palm Tree B
    A skill that represents the daily prophecies that Rider herself had done under the shade of a palm tree during her time as judge over the twelve tribes. It allows the summoning of a palm tree that allows Rider to exercise her clairvoyant abilities. It was originally a noble phantasm but degraded into a skill due to being in the Rider class.

    "Stand still, I need to focus."
    "Why are you staying on my head for this?!"
    "It is quite comfy, surprisingly."
    "What do you mean "surprisingly"?!"


    Noble Phantasm

    Song Of Deborah: With the Lord's Will, All Of The World Shall Turn Against You
    Rank: A+
    Type: Anti-Army

    The first noble phantasm of Rider, representing the victory song that she and another sang after the defeat of the invading army. It creates a High Thaumaturgy Bounded Field that creates a reproduction of the entire surrounding area where it was summoned. Coming from the idea that "Even the stars of the skies and rivers of the land will come and make themselves an enemy of you", the false land of the Bounded Field is an environment utterly hostile to any entity deemed an enemy. Buildings would collapse on them, tree roots rip themselves from under the ground to skewer their bodies, and small celestial bodies will rain down from the heavens. It is not a noble phantasm imbued with the idea of "creating an army" but one with the idea of "creating an enemy".

    It is not something that can be casually released as the intent that has been made with summoning it is the desire to save.


    Personality

    Rider has a stern personage that constantly snips and derides people in range, it goes especially for those who let others do the work. However, this is not out of genuine malice but out of worry of the maternal sort. She had to keep up the image of a spice tongued lady due to the unapologetic sinfulness of the era she lived in despite her feelings. This also goes for the one she involuntarily brought with her in her summoning though she will unhesitatingly disguise it as wanting "someone with a flexible definition of what counts as a win condition". She has a secret desire to see him become the hero he never got to be.
    "Yes, he'll definitely succeed as long as I support him but…"
    The man she brought along displays himself as an easygoing man. He is also someone who can confidently describe himself as a coward who has little chance to contend in a battle with a True Hero and so is forced to rely on his allies. He holds a great amount of care and respect for Rider but it is also because of his feelings that he willingly allowed himself to be summoned along with her. Aside from his positive feelings, he also has some worry for her.
    "She tells me to do things myself but where will that leave her."

    Last edited by Vance; January 19th, 2021 at 05:57 PM.

  7. #2127
    吸血鬼 Vampire DelRey's Avatar
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    Nah.

    Dont click me.
    jk. It's been a few years that i researched sumerian mythology, but i never heard of her. nice to learn something new. And you being the 'smug poet' in all your character introductions is canon now. Else, nice sheet of course.


    - - - Updated - - -

    Rider; Nice characters, i like their dynamic. And the NP has a cool concept of 'creating an enemy'. I dont get how Judge's Assurance is a personalized Combination skill.

  8. #2128
    リビングデッド Living Dead Vance's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DelRey View Post
    Nah.

    Dont click me.
    jk. It's been a few years that i researched sumerian mythology, but i never heard of her. nice to learn something new. And you being the 'smug poet' in all your character introductions is canon now. Else, nice sheet of course.


    - - - Updated - - -

    Rider; Nice characters, i like their dynamic. And the NP has a cool concept of 'creating an enemy'. I dont get how Judge's Assurance is a personalized Combination skill.
    Frankly, I added in that description as a reason why they don't have combination. Looking back, its fits in too messily so imma change it.

  9. #2129
    Lost in Paradise RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Deborah/Barak: Now this is a really cute sheet. Reminds me a lot of my Gideon/Gabriel Servant with the contrast between the laidback and somewhat cowardly guy and sharp-tongued smaller girl he's summoned alongside. The banter between them definitely adds some amusing flavor, and her NP is a clever twist on their legend. I am unsure actually why her Judge's Assurance Skill ranks down Luck however. It doesn't seem to fit given the whole idea is ensuring victory, unless it's to represent how Barak himself didn't get the glory in the end?

  10. #2130
    リビングデッド Living Dead Vance's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RoydGolden View Post
    Deborah/Barak: Now this is a really cute sheet. Reminds me a lot of my Gideon/Gabriel Servant with the contrast between the laidback and somewhat cowardly guy and sharp-tongued smaller girl he's summoned alongside. The banter between them definitely adds some amusing flavor, and her NP is a clever twist on their legend. I am unsure actually why her Judge's Assurance Skill ranks down Luck however. It doesn't seem to fit given the whole idea is ensuring victory, unless it's to represent how Barak himself didn't get the glory in the end?
    Oh, it's exactly what it's meant to represent. Barak basically traded surety (Luck) for safety (Strength, Endurance, and Agility). Among other things, he brought Deborah along to make sure things go right, and it did, just not in the way he would've expected.

  11. #2131
    Lost in Paradise RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vance View Post
    Oh, it's exactly what it's meant to represent. Barak basically traded surety (Luck) for safety (Strength, Endurance, and Agility). Among other things, he brought Deborah along to make sure things go right, and it did, just not in the way he would've expected.
    Ah, that makes sense. Thanks for clarifying!

  12. #2132
    妄念 Kamerad's Avatar
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    Hmph, don't try to fake politeness and humility now.
    Listen, a man who lowered his position in order to receive anything can never surpass his own fate.

    Are you the arrogant human who begged for my aid, yet dares to call himself a "Master"?




    There once was a vain existence known as Vaisravana, endowed with talent for accumulating wealth and hearing the desires of men, he was known for being generous to less fortunate men in his own act of prayer. So Brahma answered this hidden prayer, elevated him to the rank equal to the gods and entrusted him with the management of the divine treasury containing all the world’s riches.

    Even so, for him, nothing has changed. Even after his half-brother Ravana claimed his golden city, he just accepted it, and moved on to obtain an even luxurious abode. He, as before, distributed his wealth to the lesser beings, he gave out treasures to those who begged for it, and continues to obtain and accumulate even more riches for himself.

    Prayers for him increased, and so his authorities increased, he obtained various titles such as the Regent of the North, the Protector of the World, as the King of Yaksha, the God of Warriors, or the Bodhisattva of Fortune. All of them he considers just another treasure, one that he can give away as needed, in his own act of prayer --



    Praying for wealth, praying for success,
    Praying for victory, praying for strength, praying for happiness.
    You humans can’t help but to beg to the gods the things you are lacking.
    Meanwhile, the gods, sometimes listening, something deaf to their pleas, would only whimsically abide.
    To make the distinction clear, that you men are mere beggars before the divine.

    So it be, pray, so that your existence, full of suffering, be eased.



    Devotion, worship, penance, sacrifice, offerings, virtuous deeds.
    You humans have myriads of ways to pray, to beg to the gods.
    And once the gods are pleased and your wishes granted, most of you will then quickly forget.
    Turning your back from the gods, in your ungratefulness and greed you became demons.

    So it be, if it’s punishment that can make you once again beg for our mercy.



    Holy Grail… ?
    I see, even in this era, humans have not changed a bit.
    I know it all too well, like that half-brother of mine, that symbol of avarice,
    Not even all the world’s wealth would quench a man that has been made a demon by greed.
    If it is enlightenment that you seek, then only eight treasures is sufficient.

    So shall it be, demon, I have heard your prayer, your wish -- death shall be your answer.



    Class: Lancer
    True Name: Vaisravana
    Gender: Female
    Alignment: Lawful Good
    Origin: Hindu and Buddhist Mythology
    Attribute: Sky

    The leader of the Four Heavenly Kings, presiding over the North Direction. In Hinduism she is the God of Wealth, who was the original ruler of Lanka before her half-brother Ravana seized it. It is said that she was graced with godhood and entrusted with safeguarding the Treasury of the Gods by Brahma through a show of hard work, generosity and piety.

    Originally a male deity, in Nepalese and Tibetan Buddhism the veneration of Vaisravana eventually developed into the worship of his feminine aspect (shakti), Vasudhara, named after his abode said to be located nearby. This Spirit Origin is the female deity Vasudhara, but the Divine Core is still that of the God of Wealth Vaisravana.

    Parameters:
    STR: B
    END: D
    AGI: A
    MGI: A
    LCK: EX
    NP: B

    Class Skills:
    Magic Resistance: B
    Cancels most modern spells and resists high ranked thaumaturgy and rituals.

    Riding: A
    Can ride up to Divine Beasts and Phantasmal Species, with the exception of the dragonkind.

    Personal Skills:
    Great Heavenly King: A+
    As the Guardian of the North and the chief of the Four Heavenly Kings, Lancer reigns over an army of yakshas as the very bulwark against the demonic force of asura. In this regard, this skill is an all encompassing military skill which grants boosts when commanding an ally of both human and divine or nature spirit origin, and also an additional advantage against foes of evil and demonic nature.

    Wealth God’s Divine Core: EX
    A Divine Core fitting for a divinity who reigned over the domain of fortune. In addition to the usual effect, the Divine Core also provides Golden Rule, both wealth and beauty at the highest rank. Lancer can also choose to bestow the Golden Rule skill to anyone she deems worthy, and can randomly fluctuate the luck rank of others nearby.

    All Hearing One: EX
    A skill derived from the meaning of the name “Vaisravana”. It is none other than the ability to “listen and answer to human prayers”, a skill similar to Clairvoyance which allows her to perceive the needs and wants of humans, which she can choose to fulfill. In essence, in the vicinity where prayers are recited and wishes are uttered in her name or around her presence, Lancer can choose to grant them the blessing which they wished by replacing one of their possessions with a “treasure” within the divine treasury, in accordance to their karma.

    When humans beg the gods for anything, be it wealth, victory in battle, or a happy life; they are aware of their position as the beggars, presenting themselves before the gods with respect. The treasures of heaven and earth are not to be given away so carefreely, however. Lancer’s authority makes it so the right treasure falls into the right person, and assures that those who receive said treasures make good use of it.

    Noble Phantasms:
    Ashta Nidhi Chattra
    Pray for Fortune, that thy Suffering be Eased
    Type: Anti-Poverty
    Rank: E ~ A+
    The Eight Mystical Treasures within the Treasury of the Gods, consisted of all the world’s riches. The umbrella Lancer is often depicted with is none other than the key which grants access to these treasures, symbolizing her protection and authority over men. When closed, it becomes a demon-slaying lance, and when opened it becomes a shield that protects humans and a wheel of fortune that brings prosperity to the world.

    When properly deployed for combat, it became a gatling gun-like treasure launcher that spews forth the contents of Gods’ Treasury like a stream of gems. It is said that there are eight types of Noble Phantasms which represent all treasures contained in the gods’ treasury, each corresponding to every object humans need to reach enlightenment. There exists a ninth type, but it is said that having nine type of treasures would instead turn one into a demon of avarice.

    Pushpaka Vimana
    Beg for Mercy, that thy Greed be Subdued
    Type: Anti-Army
    Rank: EX
    Pushpaka Vimana. The true form of Lancer’s umbrella. A gift from Brahma, along with the responsibility of being the Treasurer of the Gods as well as the full fledged divinity of a God of Fortune. As a Lancer it manifests a floating pagoda (tower) resembling a blooming flower. Aside from fast travelling and fortification, its main function is for imprisoning, sealing and retrieving “treasures”. It is her authority as the Lord of Wealth and the Overlord of Phantasmal Species creatures.

    Designating qualifying objects or creatures as a “treasure”, the tower descends upon them and they are sealed inside the pagoda treasury and pacified, allowing them to be deployed as Lancer’s Noble Phantasm after some time.
    Last edited by Kamerad; Yesterday at 05:22 PM.

  13. #2133
    死徒二十七祖 The Twenty Seven Dead Apostle Ancestors Dragolord09's Avatar
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    Very nice Kamerad, will you be doing the other Heavenly Kings?

  14. #2134
    妄念 Kamerad's Avatar
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    probably not, from what i've seen the other 3 are a bit sparse on material anyways, unless you mean the Hindu counterpart Yama, Indra and Varuna.

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