The contest started June 1st. You have plenty of time.
Make sure you submit her in the contest thread, rather than this one, though.
The contest started June 1st. You have plenty of time.
Make sure you submit her in the contest thread, rather than this one, though.
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The (Legally Required) Compedium
Noted!
There’s always a part of us we hide, a part of us we trample down into the dirt. Sometimes we bury it so deep, we forget it exists, or think it’s long gone. But eventually we’ll sink back to meet it. Will you be strong enough by then to finally accept it?
Profiles for my story, Fate/Imperial matrix, coming soon!(?)
The joys of being a Mommy
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Assassin of the Inquisition
Faceclaim
Class: Assassin (Caster)
Alignment: Lawful / Evil
Info:
Stats and Deck
Class and Personal Skills
Noble Phantasms
Personality
Did you draw that, Ellis? Because that's cool as hell. Interesting use of the False tag. A pretty solid anti-mage. I'd be careful directly referencing canon NPs when describing your own, since I had to look stuff up to just to understand. I'm not sure why Grand Inquisitor is EX instead of A+. It doesn't seem super powerful, and it doesn't break the rules of normal skills. If you keep it at EX, you should probably establish what Incitement and Protection of the Faith do at EX rank for him.
That aside, I like your vision and he's decently executed.
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The (Legally Required) Compedium
thanks for the review and yep! Drew him up with the original intention of submitting him for the contest, but later thought that he didn’t quite fit the prompt and that I could come up with something better. This being my first time tryin got draw a servant, I appreciate your comment! It was hard thinking how to turn him into an anime character at first but once I started going it was easier than I thought it was going to be.
I get what you mean by the NP comment, at that point I was just trying to finish up and post it but ya, going into more detail on the description of the NP would have been better
as for Grand Inquisitor, what suggestions would you have to help “push it over the edge”?
Not entirely sure. The only major thing you really didn't touch on from the Inquisition is the branding of heretics so they can be identified later and punished if they commit heresy a second time. Maybe something like my Mary Pearcey's "marking" ability, where you can mark enemies you Interrogate, and can automatically identify them, regardless of any skill or magecraft that would normally conceal or disguise them.
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The (Legally Required) Compedium
Lord of the Spear
"The earth is disturbed... the gods are angry... Araci, if you can hear me, let know that you are alright. I fear the worse has befallen you, separated as we are by the Children of Kerana. Please, send me a sign, any sign, that you are still out there. I will come find you. I will save you. Call me, and I will come running."
True Name Allignment Class Alternative Classes Jaguarê Lawful Good Lancer Archer / Rider
Height 1.78m Weight 80kg Region Brazil Source Ubirajara Likes Hunting Dislikes Jandira, his Ex.
Parameters STR END AGI MAG LCK NP B B C C B B+
Background The greatest warrior of the Araguaia Tribe, a man of unwavering joy who was bored of everyday life and wished for challenges and adventure, delving deep into the mystery of the land as he sought something to prove himself against.
This wanderlust is what eventually lead to his meeting Araci, a demigoddess from a different tribe, daughter of the great archer Itaquê and the goddess of the moon, Jaci. She was an unearthly beauty whose visage struck Jaguarê senseless, the great warrior unable to do anything but fumble in her presence.
This first meeting would leave a mark on both.
Jaguarê, who fell in love and considered himself unworthy.
And Araci, who found joy in the company of the genuinely friendly warrior.
Though they would not meet again, the warrior sought to prove himself as someone who could win Araci’s love, seeking challenges not for enjoyment but as proof of his worthiness. Searching for a deed which would be so great that it would wipe away that shameful (in his opinion) first meeting.
This event eventually lead to his contest of strength against a mighty warrior over a priceless spear that the two wished for. Unbeknownst to him, the man he now quarreled with was none other than Araci’s brother, Pojucã the ‘Man Slayer’. A warrior cursed by his own name to always kill when challenged.
Their battle shook the ground, echoing through rivers and the wind as the two mighty warriors contested each other’s strength. Only for Jaguarê to eventually overcome and vanquish his foe. Earning himself the Spear and Title ‘Ubirajara’, who are both one and the same.
The Lord of the Spear.
With this great achievement and a captive Pojucã in tow, Jaguarê traveled to Araci’s home, where a contest was being held for her hand, which he undertook under the fake name of ‘Jurandir’.
Though he would eventually succeed and win Araci’s hand, he would also get in trouble with the chieftain, as he’d defeated and enslaved the man’s son and strongest warrior, causing war to be declared between Jaguarê’s and Araci’s tribes. The situation becoming even more desperate as a third tribe took the opportunity to join the fight, attacking and blinding Araci’s father.
In a bid to save her tribe, Jaguarê took part in a new contest, this one to decide who would become the new leader after Itaquê was blinded. The challenge being simple. Whoever manages to pull the string of the chieftain's bow, would become the new leader of the tribe.
Something not even Pojucã, the man’s son, could do.
Instead it was Jaguarê who succeeded, becoming the chieftain of two tribes and uniting them as a single whole.
The Ubirajara Tribe.
Personality A musclehead who is hopelessly in love.
Jaguarê knew only the joy of battle and the hunt before his fateful meeting with the demigoddess Araci, whose beauty enchanted him and ignited within him the need to prove himself.
Though his efforts can be crude, he measures none as he tries to achieve feats in honor of his love. Hunting down monsters, adventuring deep into the dangerous forests and deep caverns, hollowed bones of the earth. Wishing to find something which to present Araci with.
Naive, or perhaps pure of heart, he does not notice that his feelings had long since reached his beloved, who patiently waits while watching his adventures with exasperated fondness. Believing himself not yet worthy of her love, he continously throws himself against challenges.
Unlike his kin, who see those from foreign lands as untrustworthy, Jaguarê feels a strange kinship towards them. As one who was described as a ‘purehearted savage’, it was only natural that his interactions with these visitors would give some of them the impression that all who dwelled in his homeland were as bereft of common sense as this hopeless romantic.
A heroic archetype who causes himself more trouble than anything else.
Class Skills Magic Resistance
D+ Cancels Single-Action spells, possessing the same potency of an amulet that rejects magical energy. Increases when Lancer is facing an enemy with the same weapon of choice. Further increases if his enemy has Divinity.
Personal Skills Disguise B The ability to hide one’s own identity, assuming a temporary disguise meant to trick others. Jaguarê has adopted a fake identity when taking part of the contest for the hand of Araci, who belonged to another tribe.
Lord of the Spear
A Jaguarê’s unique skill. As one acknowledged as the ‘Lord of the Spear’, he possesses an advantage against enemies who use them. Able to match and overwhelm them regardless of how much stronger they are or how much more skill they have. So long as it is a contest of ‘Spearmanship’, Jaguarê will win.
Wild Heart
B The inherent quality of a hero possessed of a ‘pure heart’. It guards against mental attacks while inspiring trust and friendliness towards oneself. It does not have the leadership qualities of Charisma, instead it could be better described as a protagonist’s ‘Power of Friendship’. Affections of the Goddess C One who was loved by a maiden bearing the name of the Morning, her earthen reflection whose love mirrors that of the Lady of the Aurora who has yet to abandon the mortal coil. That is his love, Araci.
Noble Phantasms Ubirajara: Peerless Spear of the Nameless God Anti-Unit B+
A weapon of an ancient age.
Made from the bones of a strange beast by a now forgotten god.
Laid to rest when its user died fighting in the great cataclysm which heralded the twilight of the Age of Gods. It was left behind and forgotten, its power ebbing and waning as decades became centuries, and centuries millennia. Until the day where two men would contest ownership of the unveiled treasure.
Two warriors from enemy tribes, one who loved the other’s kin.
They dueled over the priceless artifact, unaware of its true origins and importance. To them it was nothing but an exemplary spear carved from the purest ivory, adorned with the feathers of something much too large for the birds which dwelled in their homeland.
The spear still carries the memory of the time of its creation. A time where humanity had yet to take its first steps and gods ruled over mighty beasts. It was created from the bones of one such beast to be of use against other gods, carrying within it a ‘anti-divinity’ trait that becomes more potent the higher the ‘divinity’ of the target.
Although limited by its current user, it can reach the B-Rank as a result of its anti divinity properties against the correct opponent.
@Wyvern
As always simple and to the point, while also being interesting. Cant wait to see how many more Brazilian servants you will make.
Is it just me, or have there been a lot of South American Servants with weapons made from the bones of AOG-era beasts?
It's a thematic choice. There have been many dinos that actually have names relating to the characters I created.
Ubirajara being one of them. And Kianda from my Aqualtune sheet. There is also the Ganga Zumba sheet. Which was also named after a god and a location connected conceptually to the character.
Also, dinosaurs are cool so let me have my fun~
interesting suggestion, thanks!
thanks!
Jaguare: nice sheet, while I am mot familiar with Brazilian lore myself, the way you were able to capture who the servant was in the skills based on your background. I liked the direction you went with the lord of the spear skill having Jaguare basically be an anti-lancer lancer. One area I would have liked for you to expand on imo would be the description of how the noble phantasm acts once used in addition to the lore you added about it. Overall love the sheet, Great job!
Last edited by Perry Ellis.; June 5th, 2021 at 12:41 AM.
My apologies of asking this but do you think of my latest version of rider of contracts
Writing-wise, it is a bit difficult to read with some of the run-on sentences. I can kind of see the vision you have, but I think everything needs to be harmonized together more. I think lore and personality need to be fleshed out more and then show why the skills and NPs reflect parts of the personality. One possibly dumb question I have is why is he considered as the Rider class? Also, regarding the second ability of the Leviathan NP, I'm guessing the exchange of skills and free will is made through a voluntary contract? The recipient is agreeing to become Rider's student (underling)?
Now, you must give your opinion of my Augustus sheet in the contest thread
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Servant Database (v2.0)
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Singularity / Lostbelt Database
For those of you who'd like to see how far I'm getting on constructing new Servant sheets
Upcoming Servant Sheets
Honestly, even if you leave out the facts that A: It does need stats to be a proper sheet and B: It needs a grammar check very badly, it still reads like its a half-way done WIP sheet rather than a fully completed one. I can kinda of see the idea behind this sheet but the messiness of the format makes it very hard to understand it.
I think you Lancer is quite well done and yes Dinosaurs or other Antique Beasts are cool like i did a Giant Sea Cow as Steller mount and as the Primary of Nefrosobek a Spinosaur . so i understand you Tomo yo (my friend) i would be curious About his Noblephantasm in his other classess ? and what does he and Iara think of my Shamaness Girl i am curious ?
Last edited by Kabalisto Koga; June 5th, 2021 at 04:35 PM.
Your verified Chikara-production Studios !
Dont ship me with anyone unless i say so !
When you wake a Dragon in his Lair...
Ironically, the Rider version of Jaguarê would also wield his spear, but instead of possessing anti-divinity properties, he would be able to use that Spear to summon the ancient creature whose bones and feathers were used to make it.
As an archer, Jaguarê would have two bows. One belonging to his own tribe, connected to his mantle and chieftain, and a second bow which he obtained in the contest to decine the next chieftain of Araci's tribe. Thus, his uniting the two bows is considered an act of uniting two tribes into one.
As for his attitude towards the spiritual and the divine... he actually doesn't think much about them.
Rather, he knows to show respect towards Shamans and Spirits, but he is completely lacking in the ability to communicate with them. Being a straightforward protagonist archetype, he would try to make friends with these individuals and entities because he is not very nuanced when it comes to relationships. If you aren't a friend or a foe, he won't really bother you either way.
There’s always a part of us we hide, a part of us we trample down into the dirt. Sometimes we bury it so deep, we forget it exists, or think it’s long gone. But eventually we’ll sink back to meet it. Will you be strong enough by then to finally accept it?
Profiles for my story, Fate/Imperial matrix, coming soon!(?)