Create-A-Servant 3

[Shiki-pon]

Asking for an opinion since I'm eventually going to have some more time for Servant sheets.
One of the things I'm currently working on is a sheet for Peisistratos, the Tyrant of Athens. Now the thing is, he doesn't have much that would make him interesting as a Servant on his own (I mean, he has plenty of deeds, but those are mostly politicky things). However, Aristotle seems to have related his era with that of the golden age of Classical mythology, where the world was ruled by Kronos. This connection was apparently formed from a popular saying from around and after Peisistratos' era.
So the question is, would giving Peisistratos Kronos-powers be going too far? I mean, technically it might be possible that he was possessed or found some parts of the Machine God or something, but it seems a little far-fetched even by my standards.

[the god of world-0]

If you found giving him literal god powers too much, you can always go the more secure root of innocent monster and the likes.

[King of Padoru]

You could even make him a Kronos Pseudo-Servant (though I guess that's too easy), or pull some conceptual stuff that returns an area to the peak of the Age of Gods

[RoydGolden]

Glad you liked the new skill, I thought it'd be really fun to make such a skill. If you don't get dissolved by the NP, you get stuck there until the duo decides to release you. I didn't write it in the sheet because it was from an unreliable source, but I read that Wùkōng managed to escape by convincing them to trade the gourd by another that could suck in the heavens.

That actually makes it a really powerful NP then. Albeit limited by the fact that they need to know the target's true name to imprison them, which would be a big obstacle in most Grail Wars where Servants usually try hard to keep their identities hidden. Once it's invoked, is there any way to escape being drawn in? Otherwise it's basically an unavoidable instant K.O provided they know the enemy's name.

[King of Padoru]

I didn't think of a way to actually counter the NP or avoid its effects. Maybe I should add something like needing to pass a resistance or Luck check?

[Kabalisto Koga]

I didn't think of a way to actually counter the NP or avoid its effects. Maybe I should add something like needing to pass a resistance or Luck check?

or how would it be if the gourd has on the inside an weakpoint or Escape way that the sage put in to ensure that if they are stolen and used against Innocents that they can flee from the gourds ?somethng like that would be plausible i think ?

please tell me how you find my Steller as id like to know if i keeped a Level of Quality since my Demeter and Persephone profile after your oppinion ?

[King of Padoru]

or how would it be if the gourd has on the inside an weakpoint or Escape way that the sage put in to ensure that if they are stolen and used against Innocents that they can flee from the gourds ?somethng like that would be plausible i think ?

please tell me how you find my Steller as id like to know if i keeped a Level of Quality since my Demeter and Persephone profile after your oppinion ?

I doubt there would be such a convenient thing. Wùkōng was incredibly smart, so you'd think he'd have found out about it if it existed.

Yes, you have improved quite a lot since your latest contest sheet. You still need to work with your grammar, but at least it's readable.

[Hawkeye]

Asking for an opinion since I'm eventually going to have some more time for Servant sheets.
One of the things I'm currently working on is a sheet for Peisistratos, the Tyrant of Athens. Now the thing is, he doesn't have much that would make him interesting as a Servant on his own (I mean, he has plenty of deeds, but those are mostly politicky things). However, Aristotle seems to have related his era with that of the golden age of Classical mythology, where the world was ruled by Kronos. This connection was apparently formed from a popular saying from around and after Peisistratos' era.
So the question is, would giving Peisistratos Kronos-powers be going too far? I mean, technically it might be possible that he was possessed or found some parts of the Machine God or something, but it seems a little far-fetched even by my standards.

Well back then most kings were considered some type of divinity (Divine right of Kings in England, the Egyptian God-Kings and Greek Kings who claimed descent from various gods) so having a king with god-like powers isn't really a big deal from way back when.

Having done a little bit of research, apparently he rode into the city on a golden chariot with a woman pretending to be Athena. So if you take the idea of salvaging machine god parts and that Aristotle called his rule a Golden Age of Cronus, you could make it so that his chariot literally invokes technological advance or divine influence from the old gods. Perhaps even a sort of conflicting nature to make it some literal Deus Ex Machina.

[RoydGolden]

Servant Caster:

Appearance:

Source

True Name: Sappho

Alignment: Neutral Good

Strength- E
Agility- D
Endurance- D
Mana- A
Luck- C
NP- A+

Personality

Cheerful and brazen. An utterly incorrigible flirt, she openly tries to seduce any pretty girl who catches her eye. However, while she may appear a debauched hedonist on the surface Caster is actually a woman with very strong principles and morals. She believes passionately in freedom, and detests the idea of being people forced to do anything against their will. Thus while she will flirt shamelessly with girls, Caster would never try to rape one.

Summoned in the modern day Caster takes on a fascination for Yuri manga that exalts love between girls. She tailors her demeanor after the characters from such stories, wearing modern clothes and using her Magecraft to conjure phantasmic lily petals during any especially romantic moment. As she was a schoolteacher in life, Caster sometimes enjoys dressing up in teacher-like clothes and recreating the scenario of "an innocent schoolgirl gets seduced by her experienced lesbian professor". Only with consent, of course.

With regard to men, it's not that Caster hates them, she just has no interest in them romantically. Caster could be friends with a man perfectly fine, but sexually they're about as appealing to her as a potato. "As for the legend where I jumped off the cliffs of Leucadia after getting spurned by some man, well let's just say people like making up all sorts of rumors. And history's first recorded lesbian makes a more fertile target for such than many."

Incidentally, Caster has a bit of a complex over her small height, which she sees as going against her "mature seductress" image. In life she was described as

quite tiny

Pantelos Mikra

for her short stature, but it seems bringing that up around her will cause her to show a pouty expression.

When asked for her wish on the Holy Grail, Caster would instantly reply "For all the pretty girls in the world to be my harem of course, ufufufu..." But that's just an idle jest, and Caster's real reason for seeking the Grail is far deeper. To eradicate all forms of homophobia and discrimination, creating a world where people can live as equals no matter who they love.

Likes: free love, the Yuri genre, music
Dislikes: bigotry, boorish men
Talents: poetry, teaching, playing the harp, and bedding beautiful girls
Natural Enemy: Alcaeus

Class Skills:

Territory Creation- A
The ability to formulate a territory advantageous to oneself as a Magus. As a teacher Caster can establish the domain of a "School" analogous to a Temple.

Within the School she gains bonuses to all her spells, and those inside it also have their mental clarity sharpened.

Item Construction- C+
A talent to craft items tinted with magical energy. Caster can create manuscripts on which she inscribes her spells. When anyone reads the script the spell's effect is immediately actualized. Caster favors weaving subtle charm spells into her works, so that whoever reads them is instilled with the desired emotion. After all, as a poet her greatest ability lies in stirring the hearts of others, whether for good or ill.


Personal Skills:

Romance Of Blooming Lilies- A+
Caster's acclaim as the "Mother of Lesbian Poetry" sublimated into a Personal Skill. A narrowing of the Charisma Skill geared exclusively towards charming those who share the user's sex; in other words, fellow women. At this rank Caster's capacity to entice the fairer sex is almost at the level of a divine curse. Even a straight girl who never felt any attraction to women before might find herself melting into Caster's arms after trading a few sweet words.

Despite appearances this isn't a mental attack but merely awakening one's latent desires that aren't acknowledged by society. As such it can't be guarded against by Skills and Noble Phantasms granting mental resistance. Instead, to resist Caster's charms one needs a chaste mind that brushes off any sort of seduction, or a preexisting attachment to another individual strong enough to overwhelm its effects. (Read; she has no interest in NTR).

Incidentally, this Skill's original name is merely "Sapphic Charisma" but Caster has modified it after her personal infatuation with the Yuri genre.

Divinity- E
Qualifies one's aptitude as a Divine Spirit. Caster was extolled by Plato as tenth amongst the Nine Muses, Divine Spirits of poetry. However as that was merely an unsourced claim, Caster only obtains the barest smear of godly affinity.

High-Speed Incantation (Fragment)- C
The capacity to recite spells at high-speeds. Caster's variant of this Skill reflects how much of her manuscripts have been lost to history, with only sparse fragments surviving. In some cases only a few lines or even words remain of Caster's poems that scholars have to use to piece together the original text.

As such Caster can evoke her lyrical spells without needing to incant the entire verse. Merely murmuring a brief fragment is enough to call upon the full power of the desired spell.

Protection Of The Music God (True)- A
Denotes the divine protection of the goddess of arts, Muse. Makes impossible to distinguish all kinds of sounds and play a masterful musical performance. Also this Skill boosts the effectiveness of music-based Magecraft. Caster was skilled in playing the harp and many of her poems were intended to be put to music.

This Skill has been further bolstered by her identification as the tenth Muse by Plato. In essence, she can be seen as receiving the blessing of Muse from herself.

Lyric Poet- A+
Measures one's proficiency in ancient Greek lyrical poetry. Lyric poems were meant to be recited, often before a crowd and to musical accompaniment. They served a variety of purposes such as honoring the dead, commemorating victories, stoking the courage of soldiers before battle, seducing lovers and cutting an enemy's reputation down to size.

As one of the nine great lyric poets of Greece Caster obtains a high rank in this Skill. Acts as a composite of Eye For Art and Alluring Euphony at the same rank. Caster can easily recognize Noble Phantasms with artistic anecdotes and her voice imparts a powerful fascination Magecraft-like effect when reciting poems. The latter aspect can be expedited through her High-Speed Incantation (Fragment) Skill.

Noble Phantasm

Lesbos Noesis

Testimony Of Love

Rank: A+

Type: Anti-Unit

A Noble Phantasm making manifest Caster's revolutionary style of poetry. While earlier poets narrated impartially from the viewpoint of the gods, Caster strove to depict emotions and relationships in people's hearts through introspective, personal writing. That feat has been brought forth as her Noble Phantasm.

By reciting its true name and reaching her hand into the target's chest, Caster can draw out their soul in the form of a glowing, ethereal papyrus scroll. This scroll materializes the target's entire life and psyche. Inscribed within it are all their thoughts and achievements, free for Caster to peruse at her pleasure. That alone makes this an exceedingly effective Noble Phantasm for uncovering secrets, even capable of putting to words hidden and unutterable feelings the target themselves wasn't aware of.

However, Lesbos Noesis' true power is far more terrifying. Caster can freely "edit" the scroll at will by scribbling inside its margins (using a stylus is unnecessary for Caster can even trace the letters with her bare fingers). As the scroll is the target's soul, Caster's alterations will enforce themselves on their actual psyche. In other words, if Caster writes that they fall madly in love with her, they will do so. If she writes that someone ripped them off, the target will feel an instinctive aversion towards that person. An insidious Noble Phantasm that manipulates the emotions in the human heart itself, able to stir love into hatred or vice-versa.

But that's just in theory. In reality, since Caster can only add pages and not remove them, she's limited in how much of the person's psyche she can mold. More radical changes that go against the foundation of "who the person is" will lead to severe psychological dissonance as the victim struggles to reconcile them with their actual personality. Most likely outcome is they'll be simply driven insane by the contradiction between their false psyche and the real one. Furthermore, Caster is a kind person who despises toying with people's hearts. As such she'd usually never use this aspect of her Noble Phantasm unless the person themselves wished for it as a form of "therapy".

Against Servants Lesbos Noesis displays an additional power. The scroll encapsulates not only the Servant's memories but also their legend itself. As such by modifying it Caster can literally rewrite the Servant's Saint Graph, granting them Skills, Noble Phantasms and even personality traits they'd properly possess in other Classes. However, for Servants this Noble Phantasm carries the further weakness that Caster is unable to invoke it on them without knowing the target's true name.

When Caster draws the scroll out of someone's chest, they're rendered unconscious until she returns it. Sealing the scroll is also necessary to affix any changes Caster makes. Caster can only hold on to the scroll for around a minute before it automatically shimmers away and the target wakes up.

---

So here's a sheet for Sappho, the mother of lesbian love. I'm aware her NP is pretty close to Heaven's Door from JoJo, but I couldn't think of any other fitting ideas for her. Besides, I did try to set it apart in some ways. As usual, any comments and critique would be heartily welcomed. Thanks for reading y'all!

[King of Padoru]

"I swear I'm not into women, my husband is Dickman from Schlong Island".

Nothing wrong with the NP being like Heaven's Door, since it fits the thematic really well. Overall she's a really nice and creative Servant that I'd love to summon if I had the chance to do so, because of her potential as a Caster and because she hits almost all my right spots. Great work, Royd!

[SSW]

Saber of Riddles






True Name: Oedipus
Class: Saber
Alternate Classes: Rider, Berserker
Gender: Male
Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Source: Classical Mythology
Region: Ancient Greece
Attribute: Earth


Likes: Family, Himself
Dislikes: Prophecy, Birds
Talents: Riddles, Ruling
Natural Enemy: Himself

Personality and History

Personality:

A haughty man with an abundance of confidence. A man who considers himself a great king and leader, a genius of unparalleled intellect. A true hero, assured of his own ability.


Well, underneath that facade, there is a deep sadness, a despair at the course his life inevitably took. Of those whose lives were destroyed by a terrible fate, Oedipus’ was one of the most tragic. Though he considers this the fault of fate rather than his own actions, there is no denying that he played a part in it.


His desire is to show his true nature as a hero, to prove his own ability despite his tragic ending. Though he is the type who would just as soon fight with his words as with a sword. Someone who will happily sit down for a game of riddles with an enemy rather than fight them - even if this is rooted in better proving his superiority.


Naturally, he despises the meaning his name has taken on in the modern world. He won’t bear insults based on it, even from his own master.


History:


A child born to a terrible prophecy - that he would murder his father, and marry his mother. In an attempt to avert this, his parents had his ankles pierced and gave him to a servant to abandon him on a mountainside. But the servant didn’t have the heart to abandon the child, giving him over to a shepherd from Corinth. The child was given a home by the king and queen of Corinth, and he grew up as a prince.


Eventually, he learned of the prophecy, and left his home for fear of fulfilling it. On the route, he encountered his father, and after quarreling over who had the right of way in a particular pass, Oedipus killed his birth father. In attempting to avert fate, it was naturally fulfilled.


Travelling to Thebes, Oedipus encountered the Sphinx, and was the only one able to solve her famous riddle. After his slaying of the Sphinx, Thebes was set upon by another great monster, the Teumessian Fox. It seems Oedpius also had something to do with finding a way to catch the beast that could never be caught.


For these deeds, he was given the hand of queen Jocasta, his mother, in marriage, therefore fulfilling his fate. He proved a good king, but Thebes soon met with another tragedy, as a plague beset it as a punishment for Oedpius’ killing of the king.


Oedipus searched for the killer, unable to realise his own culpability even with the advice of the seer Tieresias. Eventually, the only living witness to the previous king’s death returned, and Jocasta, realising what had happened, killed herself in despair. Oedipus, witnessing this, blinded himself as punishment.


Leaving the city with his two sister-daughters, Oedipus spent a while under Theseus’ protection. He cursed his quarreling sons, even as they came to him for help, damning the city of Thebes to further suffering. He died not long after.


Relations

Ozymandias

"How many Sphinxes? That’s absolutely cheating!"


Theseus

"After your kindness - of course, I’m eternally grateful."


Achilles

"Someone who runs ever ahead towards their fate… Ah, if only we could swap."


Iskandar

"That game, Admirable Tactics… Does it happen to have a multiplayer?"


Raikou

"Why do I get the feeling that I should stay far, far away from you?"


Caesar

"I have to say, I’m irritated. Writing about me so casually, who do you think you are?"

Parameters and Skills

Parameters

Strength: C
Agility: C
Endurance: C
Mana: B
Luck: E


Class Skills

Magic Resistance: A


Grants protection against magical effects, cancelling the spells altogether. At this rank, any spell below A-rank is cancelled, even on the level of High Thaumaturgy. Grants one the status of a true Magus Killer.


Riding: A

A skill denoting the ability to ride mounts and vehicles. At this rank, all vehicles and creatures except those of Phantasmal Beast and Divine Beast rank can be used as mounts.


Saber has good aptitude for the Rider class, but his pride makes him insist on being summoned in the ‘strongest class’.


Personal Skills


Swollen Footed: -

A skill representing Oedipus’ maiming as a child. Piercing his heels and leaving him in the wild, it was thought certain that the baby would die. In this case, fate ensured he was saved, if only for later misfortunes.


Representing the ability to preserve one’s own life in the pursuit of enforcing fate. As injuries increase, one becomes closer to an inhuman entity that exists to carry out destiny. Though similar in some senses to Battle Continuation, it has no bearing on one’s ability to continue fighting despite injuries.


Having perhaps the most taboo and horrific fate of any Greek hero, Saber serves as an embodiment of the cruel inevitability of fate, and the suffering it causes.


Naturally, as a being of this kind, the ability to ‘avert the course of fate’ is almost nil.


Enigma’s Elucidation (False): A

The ability to find solutions to problems that no others could perceive. Utilising reasoning based on perceived information, one can answer any question, so long as the basic information is sufficient. Includes lateral thinking and the resolution of paradoxes.


However, it has more to do with intuition and one’s own differing experience than any practiced and methodological reasoning. Saber is closer in nature to ‘a player of mental games’ than ‘a great detective’.


Due to Saber’s own pride, it becomes impossible to deduce negative conclusions about one’s own person.


Eye of the Mind (False): C

A natural talent to avoid danger based on innate intuition and augmented by experience. Even penalties of visual obstruction can be resisted.


Though essentially a combat ability, it can be used in tandem with Saber’s other intuitions to gather information through which solutions can be deduced.

Noble Phantasms

Jocasta
Cursed Sword of Patricide


Rank: C+
Type: Anti-Unit
Range: 0-1
Maximum Targets: 1


A sword used Saber used to slay his own father, and later to put out his own eyes in remorse. A weapon that enforces fate, that punishes hubris.


A sword that represents a cycle of transgression and punishment. Laius’ sins brought about the divine punishment of the sphinx, both of whom Oedipus slew. Oedipus’ own transgression brought about a plague until he took up his own punishment. Even so, the cycle of tragedy of Thebes, of Cadmus’ bloodline, continued.


Upon releasing its true name, it will unleash a torrent of curses upon the enemy, trapping them in a ‘world of shadows’ that tailors a perfect punishment to meet their sins.



The Riddle of the Sphinx
Let us Commence with the Battle of Wits!


Rank: A
Type: Anti-Unit
Range: 0-20
Maximum Targets: 2


The ability of the divine Sphinx plaguing Thebes, taken from the monster after solving its riddle. One can consider it an inherited title of ‘King of Games’.


The creation of a contract between two beings, establishing a challenge between these entities. Setting terms of the contract is unnecessary; the mere challenge of a riddle can serve as an implicit challenge. The stakes, too, are implicitly ‘death’. Though any expertise in Magecraft would allow one to notice, and possibly take advantage of, the creation of the link, something that makes the Noble Phantasm risky to use.


It does not have to take the form of a riddle, and can be a more complex game depending on Saber’s own preference.

Bond CE

A Worn Walking-Stick


“What walks on four feet in the morning,
Two in the afternoon, and three at night?”
This stick, it’s rather like a leg, isn’t it?
And I can remember, distantly, crawling,
Dragging bloody, swollen legs through grass.


That was my thinking at the time, of course.
It hurts to admit, but perhaps…
I couldn’t have seen this result without
This despised fate of mine.

Notes

Another of my old sheets. This one wasn't used for an RP, and isn't the sort of thing I'd really like to play, but it was fun enough to write. I was debating on a meme faceclaim of some yugioh thing, but decided against it in the end. I could probably have gone into more detail on the NPs but I'm not really sure what to add.

Oedipus putting out his eyes is usually with dress pins or something, but in Voltaire's play it's with the sword that he also killed his father with. A bit of nice symmetry that justifies Saber class, so that's cool. Thanks, Voltaire! Julius Caesar also wrote a play about him, but it's lost to history. I guess it was a pretty common topic.

[The Fair Tyrant]

Out of curiosity, are there any other figures from history or mythology who could have been multiple people using the same title, similar to the Hassans or Robin Hood in the Nasuverse?

[Kabalisto Koga]

Out of curiosity, are there any other figures from history or mythology who could have been multiple people using the same title, similar to the Hassans or Robin Hood in the Nasuverse?

Hm thats a tricky Question i would think of Jack the Ripper which does offer several Options ,then perhaps some Groups of beings that in the mythology were not distinguished from each other like the sumerian Apkallu would Count i think .

- - - Updated - - -

Oedipus: an well done work i must say , though im curious how is noblephantasm are in his other classes ?

[Cursed by Fortuna]

​0

[King of Padoru]

“*krrrr*… *ptsssh*… *krrrr*… *ptsssh*…”

Class: Avenger
Identity: Vladímir Komaróv
Gender: Male
Source: Historical fact
Origin: USSR
Alignment: Chaotic Evil
Height: 188 cm (mechanical parts included)
Weight: 91 kg (mechanical parts included)

Parameters:
Strength: D++
Endurance: C++
Agility: D++
Mana: E
Luck: E
NP: A

Skills

Class skills

Avenger: C
The nature of an Avenger that gathers grudges and hatreds. Increases the amount of mana generated when receiving damage.
---
[Increase NP gain (16%) when taking damage.]
[Reduce all party’s (including sub-members) debuff resistance (6%) except self. (Demerit)]

Oblivion Correction: A
Increase of critical strength for attacks beyond memory. Even if others forget, an Avenger will always remember what hurt them.
After his death, Komaróv was crowned a hero by the USSR, but that would never suffice to mitigate his rage. How could he forgive the people that honored him if they were the ones to kill him to begin with?
---
[Increase critical damage (10%).]

Self-Replenishment (Mana): ⁠—
One’s hatred surges endlessly in the form of mana, restoring magical energy every turn.
Due to his sparse mana reserves, Komaróv doesn’t possess this skill.
---
[Charge own NP gauge (0%) every turn.]

Personal skills

Determination of Steel: B
A composite skill comprising the effects of Bravery and Calm and Collected. The resolve and strength of will necessary to endure superhuman levels of stress and ignore pain to a certain degree.
Despite not meeting all the criteria to be selected as an active astronaut, it was thanks to Komaróv’s determination to go to space, as well as his intellect, that he could become an active cosmonaut. Currently, this skill allows him to bear the effects of his disfigurement, though it’s not enough to totally relieve him of his constant agony.
---
[Ignore invincibility (1 turn).]
[Increase own attack (27.5 – 45%) for 1 turn.]
[Increase own debuff resistance (17.5 – 27%) for 1 turn.]

Race towards the Stars: B-
A participant in the competition between the USA and the USSR to conquer space. A skill exclusive to those who were able to abandon the planet and reach the outer cosmos, and that includes all the talents required to do so, including Riding.
Komaróv was one of the most qualified men the USSR possessed in terms of skill, experience and knowledge, only being discarded due to his physical condition and age. His years as a pilot of the Soviet Air Force contributed to his ability as a rider, but due to him being the first astronaut to die in a space flight and not being in the Rider class, this skill receives a minus modifier.
---
[Increase own Quick performance (20 – 30%) for 3 turns.]
[Increase own critical star absorption rate (400 – 800%) for 3 turns.]

Pseudo-Mechanical Aberration: A
A half-man, half-machine creature. The combination of Innocent Monster and Mechanical Armor into a single skill.
Due to the stories about his death, Komaróv’s whole body is burned to the point that it can’t be possibly healed by any medical procedure or magecraft, several organs have been destroyed, and he suffers excruciating pain constantly. Even with a body of ether, he wouldn’t be able to survive on his own, so the Soyuz-1 has been modified by this skill as well, constantly providing him with life support. Ironically, he can only live now because he cursed the ship in which he died.
Additionally, Strength, Endurance, and Agility obtain a ++ modifier.
---
[Gain (5 – 10) critical stars every turn for 3 turns.]
[Grant invincibility to self (1 turn).]

Noble Phantasm

Padshiy Kosmonavt

The fallen astronaut

[Increase own NP strength (20%) for 1 turn. (Activates first)]
[Deal (600 – 1,000 %) damage to whole enemy party.]
[Deal (1,000) damage to self. (Demerit)]
Overcharge: [Inflict Curse status (500 – 1,500) to whole enemy party for 5 turns.]

Type: Anti-Army
Rank: B+
Range: 1~20
Maximum number of targets: 50 people

Returns the Soyuz-1, which appears as Komaróv’s life support, to its true form as a space rocket. As a vessel from barely half a century ago, it originally pales in comparison to other Noble Phantasms, and its only remarkable features would be its ability to fly to space and its resistance to the heat and friction of an atmospheric re-entry. However, Komaróv is said to have cursed this ship during its last moments, and his grudge has turned it into an Innocent Monster as well. As a result of becoming a monster and the Noble Phantasm of an Avenger, the Soyuz-1 is now more durable, and only a full-strength attack from a mighty Servant would be able to obliterate it easily. At the same time it accumulates damage, it also collects the growing grudge of Komaróv, who continues cursing it for having been the cause of his death.

Release of the True Name will reenact the tragic accident that took Komaróv’s life. The rocket will fly to outer space, just to reenter the atmosphere immediately and crash down on the earth at terminal speed. The impact makes the jet fuel to burst into flames, thus provoking a fiery explosion that burns the surrounding area. Together with the fire, all the pent-up curses contained within the ship are released, increasing the harm with grudge damage. Needless to say, the Soyuz-1 is rendered useless after this Noble Phantasm is used, and thus Komaróv will die again in the same way as in the past.

Character

Personality

A metallic voice and a mechanical breathing aren’t enough to cover the emotions that cloud an Avenger’s mind. His charred body, encased in a coffin of armor, shouldn’t be able to move on its own, but even so it moves, fueled by hatred and curses. However, his feelings are not only of resentment and pain. Due to the conflation of reality and fiction, he harbors several doubts about his character. He is convinced about all what he remembers being true, but at the same time wonders if things actually happened as his memory tells him. In any case, he believes that the rocket he piloted was flawed on purpose and that his death was part of an assassination plot, and will never forgive the Soviets that were accomplices of it.

Maybe as a secondary effect of his confusing origins, maybe as a remainder of true admiration, maybe as a mix of both, he holds Yúriy Gagarin, his friend and comrade, in high regard. He is the only person that he will never allow himself to hate, no matter what. Moreover, once he gets to know of his death, he will do anything on his hand to save him once more, as he supposedly did in the past.


Treatment with the Master

Having been betrayed and killed by his own coworkers in the past, it’s not easy for him to rely on a Master. During the first stages of the contract, he will even question whether the Master is a Soviet or a descendant of one, probably even killing them if he doesn’t trust them enough. Over time, his doubts will be dispelled, but most of the time he is speaking to himself, what still makes it difficult to form a proper bond with him.


Dialogue examples

Bond 1: “Where is Yúriy? Is he safe? Is he all right?”

Bond 2: “You… You said Yúriy died. Who did it? Was it you?! No… You didn’t kill him.”

Bond 3: “Now I understand, Yúriy had an accident with his jet and died. It’s too similar to what happened with that rocket. …Why? Why did they want to kill him? ”

Bond 4: “Something feels wrong with my memories. Yúriy was a national hero. He was loved by us Soviets. There is no way they wanted him dead. Then… Why did I die in that rocket? Why do I curse my casket even now?”

Bond 5: “Yúriy is dead. I am dead. Most of our coworkers from back then are surely dead. But even so I must learn the true circumstances of my death. I must know what provoked my death, and if it was intended to kill my friend. And then… I will find a way to have my revenge…”

Likes: “I always liked piloting. In the past I had a talent for airships… And then, I became a cosmonaut, and died…”

Dislikes: “I curse you, botched ship that became my coffin. I curse you, compatriots that didn’t bother to prevent this death, who attempted against my friend’s life! I curse you, I curse you, I curse you, I curse you! I curse all of you!!”

Wish for the Grail: “I heard about your death, Yúriy! I can’t allow our glory to be victim of such a fate! Even if this body must remain charred until the end of time, I’ll do everything in my power to save you!”

Personal data

Historical depiction

Vladímir Mikháylovich Komaróv was one of the earliest astronauts successfully sent to space by the Soviet Union. He was the commander during the flight of the Voskhod-1, the first space flight to carry more than one person, to have its crewmen fly without a spacesuit, and to carry an engineer to space. He also was the first astronaut to travel twice to space… and the first one to die during a space flight.

Possessing great intelligence and an outstanding ranking as chief pilot in the Soviet Air Force, Komaróv was one of approximately 3,000 soldiers to be chosen as a cosmonaut candidate. He participated as an engineer-captain in the design of the Vostok-1, the ship that made of Yúriy Gagarin the first human on space, and the Voskhod-1; however, he didn’t meet the criteria of age, height, and weight that were established by the Chie Designer of the USSR’s space program, and wasn’t selected as a top candidate in spite of his intellectual qualifications.

Having entered the space program in 1960, Komaróv wasn’t declared apt for space flight until 1964 due to a minor surgery and irregularities in his heart. Normally, his health condition would have spelled immediate disqualification from the program, but his experience as an engineer and his persistence allowed him to stay. During his training, Komaróv was liked and respected by his peers for his humble demeanor and his experience. He also played the role of senior by assisting other astronauts in their academic studies, earning the nickname of ‘The Professor’.

In 1964, Komaróv became the prime commander of the Voskhod-1, with his two crewmates being civilians without any flight experience. During the mission, he was given several relics to take to space, performed medical and navigational tests, observed the auroras, and even sent a greeting to the Tokyo Olympics by radio. After the operation, he received the Order of Lenin and Hero of the Soviet Union awards.

In 1967, he was elected commander of the Soyuz-1. Many astronauts, including him, had reported and complained about several design flaws of the space craft that could provoke a disaster, but those flaws weren’t solved, and Komaróv was forced to fly the ship after being reprimanded by his superiors. After two days orbiting the Earth, Komaróv was ordered to land, but at a certain moment, the communications were lost. By the time the rocket was found, it had crashed and the jet fuel exploded. The remains of Komaróv were strapped to the seat, forming a mass that the g-forces had deformed and the fire had burned to the point that it couldn’t be recognized as human.

The reason for him being summoned as an Avenger lies in the curse of an Innocent Monster that afflicts him. It has been commonly accepted that the final words that were ever heard from him were screams of rage and curses to the botched ship that had become his grave. Apparently, the most modern translations state that the communications were lost short after Komaróv confirmed that most of the features of the rocket were functioning properly, but even so the mental image of the people hasn’t changed. Furthermore, literary works about him depict him as a sacrificial hero and a martyr that flew on the Soyuz-1 to protect Yúriy Gagarin from a certain death. How much of it is true and how much of it is false isn’t totally known, but despite that, Vladímir Komaróv is now a Servant that curses this fate.


Armament

Life support to survive in almost every hostile environment and reduce pain. Verniers and jets for high mobility and stabilization after an impact. Modified welding tools that act as burning blades for combat.


Related characters

Neil Armstrong
I see. It’s no wonder they won the race against us. Ah, if only Yúriy had lived more…

Voyager
Someday, you will crash on a planet lost in the vastness of the universe, probably not to be found by anyone. Will you continue to carry the hopes of people knowing of the possible despair that awaits you? …I see. If he had met you, he would surely…

Antonio Salieri
Although there are similarities between their characters, they fundamentally don’t get along for their views on the person they respectively praised.

Charles Babbage
An impressive set of armor. However, no matter how great his genius, it’s unavoidable that this rocket crashes and kills me…

What do you know, an astronaut that isn't a Rider or a Foreigner or anything similar. I was slightly inspired on Star Wars, specifically on Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader, and I'd have liked to introduce a few more parallels, but his character would probably have changed too much from the idea I had.

I've also added a link to a picture that shows the terrible state of his body after being retrieved from the crash. Click it at your own risk, it's not a pleasant view.

[RoydGolden]

Servant Saber:

Appearance:

Source

True Name: Ilya Muromets

Alignment: Chaotic Good

Alternate Classes: Archer, Rider, Berserker

Strength- A+
Agility- C
Endurance- A
Mana- B
Luck- B
NP- B

Personality

A boisterous and stubborn, yet purehearted and idealistic woman. Saber usually has a rowdy, carefree demeanor that enjoys hanging out in pubs, fighting and flirting with cute guys and gals who catch her eye. However when she sees innocents in peril Saber shows the side of a mature knight-hero with a firm sense of ethics. She will first try to resolve the situation without hurting anyone, but if that fails won't hesitate to draw her sword and mercilessly slay the evildoer.

Having known the shame of disability in her early life, Saber is deeply compassionate to the sick and unfortunate. She believes that no one has the right to look down on others, because everyone is only a stroke of fortune away from becoming healthy or lame again. Similarly Saber fiercely opposes all forms of snobbery and discrimination. This was shown in how she accepted Tugarin into the Bogatyr even though he had the blood of a dragon, and befriended Svyatogor, an earth-giant whose clan was slaughtered by humans.

Saber dreamt of creating a knight-order where people of all classes and creeds can come together, irrespective the circumstances of their birth. As long as they show the strength and conviction to protect what they hold dear anyone can become a knight, at least that what's Saber herself adamantly believes. She's an idealistic woman who exudes a natural charisma, even if it's not that of a ruler but more a "laidback but mature big sister" who can give advice to guide down the right path. While she fought to defend Kiev in many fierce battles, Saber never pledged her sword to her country, but to her own sense of justice.

Saber deeply grieves the feuds that fractured her knight-order, where Tugarin went rogue and had to be put down by his friend and fellow Bogatyr Alyosha Popovich. She regards all the Bogatyr just the same as her own beloved family, so them fighting each other brings her great sorrow. Saber's wish on the Holy Grail would be to alter history so Tugarin never had to rebel against the knight-order, so he and Alyosha could've fought happily together as comrades until the very end. And mending Saber's own wounded heart as well.

Saber firmly believes that a battle shouldn't leave bitter regrets, but a triumph that you can take pride in as a hero. For that reason she detests the idea of friends fighting friends. If she is forced to fight a comrade Saber will desperately try to reach out to them and persuade them to put down their arms. Only if there's absolutely no other choice will Saber fight to kill her former friend, and even victorious she'd likely break down weeping in the aftermath.

Incidentally, Saber gets along well with Servants who have non-human or bestial attributes. As one who never discriminated against non-humans like giants and half-dragons but instead freely accepted them in her knight-order, she'd be eager at the chance to encounter such beings in a Grail War. Given her bluntness and lack of manners Saber can appear a bit overly forward, as she might run up to a human-hybrid and start gushing over how cool they are. It wouldn't be an overstatement to call Saber a "beastman fangirl". That said, she'll still be obviously willing to fight monstrous beings if they prove themselves a danger to innocent people.

An amusing trait of Saber's is that she has a bit of a complex about her age. As she spent most of her early life crippled and hence unable to indulge in most of the pleasures of youth, she's tugged by a desire to reclaim her lost years. As such Saber often goes out of her way to act "young", wearing trendy modern clothes and speaking in (her imitation of) modern "youth" slang. The overall effect of this comes off somewhat like a stereotypical thirty-something who tries way too hard to sound "hip and with it".

Saber also takes up a fondness for

Serafuku

Japanese school uniforms

as an embodiment of the innocent youth she never got to enjoy in life. "Hmm... *twirls around and poses* 'Ilya Muromets, 15 years old!' That's the way the saying goes, right?"

Likes: beast-people, acting young, fighting, drinking, her fellow Bogatyr
Dislikes: fights within her knight-order, being called 'old', discrimination, stick-in-the-muds
Talents: everything necessary for a Bogatyr
Natural Enemy: Prince Vladimir

Class Skills:

Magic Resistance- B
Confers protection against magical effects. At this rank, spells with a chant below three verses are nullified. Even if targeted by Magecraft on the level of High Thaumaturgy or Greater Rituals, it is difficult for the Servant to be affected. Many anecdotes exist glorifying Saber's victories over otherworldly monsters and magicians in her career as a Bogatyr. As such she undoubtedly merits a high level of resistance to supernatural forces.

Riding- A
The ability to ride animals and handle vehicles. At this rank all mundane mounts can be handled and ridden at a high degree of skill, but not Phantasmal or Divine Beasts. Shortly after Saber's miraculous healing she set off to conquer her first steed, a horse she affectionately dubbed Karkusha. Karkusha was actually a unicorn Phantasmal Beast that Saber found and managed to befriend in the wild. It'd be her main Noble Phantasm if summoned as Rider, but even in the Saber Class Ilya still wields her natural affinity for mounts. She also rode on horseback to break the siege of Chernigov, reinforcing this Skill further.


Personal Skills:

Eye Of The Mind (False)- A
Resistance to changes of visibility caused by visual interference. Also called sixth sense, or prescience; an innate talent to sense danger.

Saber was a naturally gifted warrior whose sixth sense was sharpened on the numerous adventures she embarked on in her life, battling fearsome monsters and terrible villains. At this rank she's a certified "combat-genius" who had even without training an instinctive mastery of fighting tactics. Even feats like copying the enemy's ultimate move after seeing it in action once wouldn't lie outside Saber's repertoire.

Coupled with the combat data and analysis provided by her sword (when Saber actually bothers to pay attention to it), this Skill can encroach on the realm of true precognition.

Eternal Arms Mastery- A+
Mastership of combat arts that has reached the point of being said to be unrivaled in one's era. As the most renowned legendary hero in all of Kievan Rus, Saber naturally boasts this Skill. Arms prowess is drilled into her very bones, allowing Saber to make full use of her techniques under the effects of any kind of mental hindrance.

Hero Beyond Time- A
The hero baptized in mankind's imagination as 'Ilya Muromets' is actually not a particular figure from history, but an agglomeration of many heroes both real and fictional from wildly disparate epochs. Which, if any, is the 'true' Saber is a matter altogether lost to history, as even Saber's memories are a jumble of both 'real' and 'fictional' deeds.

This Skill allows Saber to draw on the collective archive of feats attributed to 'Ilya Muromets' even if it's unknown whether she personally performed them in life. Some of the Skills she can grant herself are Protection Of The Faith at rank C from having allegedly saved Emperor Constantine the God-Loving from a monster, ability to improvise random objects as weapons from the legend where she was a monk who fought off an army when disarmed with only her boot, and Guardian Knight at rank B.

Natural Body (False)- B
Possession of a perfect human body from birth. Strength is ranked up, and the body retains its ideal shape no matter how many calories are ingested. In Saber's case, the (False) designation reflects how her exceptional physique was the result of a divine miracle rather than conditions of her birth.

Legend tells that Saber was crippled and unable to walk from a deformed spine for the first thirty-three years of her life. She was miraculously cured of this ailment when three holy travelers came to visit her, and blessed her with the ability to walk. Moreover, she'd gained superhuman strength and a body that never grew sick or fatigued.

This Skill grants the benefits of ordinary Natural Body at the same rank. However, just once during the Holy Grail War, Saber can invoke it to nullify a single wound or ailment afflicting her, much as she was miraculously healed in legend.

Noble Phantasms

Kladenets

Sword, Guide My Victory

Rank: B

Type: Anti-Unit/Support

The enchanted sword attributed to Saber in Slavic epic sagas. In reality "Kladenets" is simply the name of an archetypal hero's-sword, one which many great Slavic heroes were said to wield, such as Ivan Tsarevich. Saber's Kladenets is merely one amongst many, yet it draws its power from her own legendary exploits.

This Noble Phantasm takes the form of a thick and hefty broadsword Saber wields. Fit to be hefted by her enormous strength, it resembles a huge and roughly cut hunk of steel affixed to a hilt more than it does a proper blade. Etched all along its surface are Runic letters in the Slavic (Karuna) alphabet that blaze with otherworldly fire.

As one of its titles in mythology is the "Self-Swinging Sword" Kladenets has the unique ability to automatically seek out the most efficient route for slashing the enemy. In battle the sword acts like a magical computer, continuously amassing combat data and processing it to recommend Saber the "optimal" course of action, whether that be evading a strike or cutting down the enemy. Functionally this gives Saber an Eye Of The Mind (True) that supplements her natural Eye Of The Mind (False). By combining her innate instincts with the sword's calculations, Saber can realize feats akin to precognition.

However, given her impulsive and stubborn personality Saber will most of the time willfully ignore the advice of her own sword to go off and do her own thing. Saber herself refers to this Noble Phantasm's advice as a "pain in the ass". "Honestly, as if I want someone jabbering me about what to do while I fight. What weirdo blacksmith invented this thing?"

If Saber herself is knocked unconscious the sword can also manually take control of her body, letting her keep fighting by guiding her hands. This effectively gives Saber the equivalent of A-ranked Battle Continuation. As long as she holds her sword in hand Saber will continue to fight until she's utterly incapable of swinging it anymore. No matter how broken or mangled her body becomes, she'll keep rising up blow after blow like a mechanical doll. Even if Saber takes a mortal blow, the sword can animate her lifeless body long enough for her to kill the opponent before fading from the World.

Svyatogor Blagoslov

Earth, Bless My Steps

Rank: B

Type: Anti-Unit~Team

One of the most famous events in Saber's legend came when she befriended the last of the earth-giants, named Svyatogor. They went on many adventures together and when Svyatogor finally had to return to the earth, he breathed the last of his power into Saber as a blessing. This Noble Phantasm is the sublimated blessing she received from her friend.

In its passive state Svyatogor Blagoslov allows Saber to freely command the earth around her. She can mold it into stalagmite-like spears, defensive walls or even make it soft as mud to hamper the enemy's movements. However this Noble Phantasm's full power allows Saber to recreate Svyatogor's fate of being sealed into the earth upon the opponent. Upon the true name release thick pillars of rock begin erupting around the opponent, forming a cage. The space between the pillars is then "filled in" with earth, creating a coffin that seals the opponent within. Finally the coffin starts to rumble and sink back into the earth, bringing the enemy to their final rest.

For the opponent to break free of the earth-coffin, a Strength stat of at least B-rank is necessary. Of course, sufficient reflexes to avoid being snared to begin with are also a suitable defense.

Solovei Plač

Deathly Howl, Resound

Rank: C++

Type: Anti-Army

In life Saber encountered and defeated Solovei, a terrifying robber who killed travelers with his deafening screech before pilfering their belongings. Being a combat-genius Saber defeated Solovei by turning his own cry against him after merely seeing it in action once. "That's your ultimate technique? It's just shouting really loudly. Anyone can do that with a little lung-strength. Here, let me show you..." she remarked like that. Afterwards, Saber added this technique to her own repertoire and even showed it off to King Vladimir, accidentally destroying part of his palace in the process, much to her sheepishness. It was then sublimated into one of her Noble Phantasms.

To invoke it, Saber first takes a gigantic gulp, sucking in huge amounts of air and magical power into her lungs. She then brings her fingers to her lips and lets out an immense, deafening whistle. The sonic-blast is enough to bowl over trees, obliterate infrastructure and cause enemies to drop dead on the spot. Those who hear Saber's shriek have to pass either an Endurance or Mana check to avoid perishing instantly, having their brains ruptured by the waves of sound. Even if they survive, they'll still be momentarily deafened for a number of turns that depends on their Endurance stat.

This is a highly powerful Noble Phantasm for crowd-control. However due to its indiscriminate nature, Saber won't use it unless she can be sure none of her allies or innocent bystanders will be caught in the blast.

---

So this is another sheet I've had in mind for a long time. I designed Ilya as a strong "main protagonist"-type Servant, and her personality ended up a bit of a cross between Arturia and Iskandar. Might end up filling in some of the other Bogatyrs eventually as well, since I've got a bit of a theme going (having done Tugarin and Alyosha already). As usual, comments and critiques would be welcome. Thanks for reading!

[RoydGolden]

Vladimir: A very cool and unique Avenger. The fact that even in the throes of hatred he's doing everything out of the desire to save his friend is actually really heartwarming. Makes for a nice contrast to Salieri too. The imagery of his rocketship wrapping his body as grotesque biomechanical armor is also a cool and suitably body-horrific touch.

Out of curiosity, do you have any thoughts on my Ilya?

[Hawkeye]

Out of curiosity, are there any other figures from history or mythology who could have been multiple people using the same title, similar to the Hassans or Robin Hood in the Nasuverse?

Well there's Magoichi Saika which became something of a title I believe. Other than that, it's mostly a modern writing tool to amalgamate historic figures when telling an abridged version or to represent many people in the one role.

@King of Padoru: Love Avenger Komarov, absolutely fantastic design idea and the concept of his capsule basically turning into a giant flaming hate bomb is amazing.

[King of Padoru]

Good to know you liked Komaróv, guys! It makes me really happy that his concept has this good reception.

Ilya: I'm not very knowledgeable about the Bogatyr besides from what I've read from some sheets about them, but this Ilya in particular makes me want to see more of them. Her Noble Phantasms in particular are very creative, and it's hilarious to see her wanting to be young again. I can perfectly picture her using her whistle NP to burst the eardrums of people that call her old.

[SSW]

Oedipus: an well done work i must say , though im curious how is noblephantasm are in his other classes ?

Not really sure. I certainly thought Rider and Berserker/Avenger Oedipus should exist, but I can't really think of any Noble Phantasms beyond the whole just having the sphinx as a mount thing, which is a pet peeve of mine. Giving heroes something they fought against as a tool is something I feel has to be very strongly justified. Sphinxes are fun though, as are talking mounts, so it's not the worst example.