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Thread: Create-A-Servant 3

  1. #361
    love warrior <3 world-0 the god of world-0's Avatar
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    Archer of the Lost Star

    "Archer presenting herself. I am not that good of a Servant, so I hope you help me along the way."



    Class: Archer
    Alignment: Neutral/good
    Region: Greece
    Height: 164cm
    Weight: 53kg
    Likes: Stargazing, hunting, her sisters
    Dislikes: Being alone, being forgotten, muscle man
    Talent: hunting
    Armaments: bow and arrow, short sword
    Natural Enemy: Orion

    stats

    Str: D
    End: C
    Agi: B
    Mna: B
    Lck: C
    NP: B

    Skills


    class skills

    Magic Resistance(A): Cancel spells of A-Rank or below, no matter what High-Thaumaturgy it is. In practice, the Servant is untouchable to modern magi, so it would not be an exaggeration to title the Servant a "Magus Killer".

    Independent Action(C): It is possible for a Servant to stay in the world for one day without a Master. Having always hunt together with her sisters, Archer has little experience working alone.

    personal skills

    Divinity(C): The level of one's aptitude as a Divine spirit. Although a daughter of the titan Atlas and companion of the goddess Artemis, Archer discarded her immortal status to live with her human husband. This, she has received a rank down on this skill.

    Hunting(A): Knowledge of methods for tracking and stalking, gained through the hunts ambient partake along with her sisters. Archer is able to use the clues in the ambient to deduce if/when an enemy was there, to where they may have gone an even a rough estimate of their skills.

    Blessings of my Sisters(A): A composite skill born from the multiple blessings Archer received from her sisters. It allows her to manifest one of six different effects at a time, these being:
    - A boost to her Agility stat.
    - The equivalent of Mana Burst(Thunder) at rank C.
    - The equivalent of Animal Dialogue rank C.
    - The equivalent of Mana Burst(Water) rank C
    - The equivalent of Clairvoyance rank D
    - A bost to her strength stat.

    Fading Star(B): A skill representing one's nature of being surrounded by Shining existences and, as such, never developed their own brilliance. When fighting alongside allies, Archer will always seem to be comparatively weaker and, by extension, her companions will seem that much stronger.



    Noble phantasm


    Brilliant Seven Star Sisters
    Astra Pleiades

    rank: Anti-unit, C~A

    An unusual Noble Phantasm that cannot be said to actually belong to Archer. It is instead a collective Noble Phantasm used by the group that is called the Pleiades.
    By tugging at their unbreakable bond, Archer can manifest her and her sister's power in the form of seven arrows of light. These are technically Divine Constructs, although of low rank, and as such have their own Divinity and power independent of Archer and each other.
    The first Arrow is the one representing Archer herself and it is the weakest, only being the equivalent of a Noble Phantasm of rank C. The next five ones compose the Majority of the power, attaining B rank each. The final arrow is the one representing the eldest sister and the strongest one, reaching the power of a rank A Noble Phantasm.
    The arrows can only be shot one at a time and only in this exact order. Between each shot, a half-second is needed to prepare the next and, should Archer be interrupted, she must start again from the first arrow.



    Background


    Archer's identity is that of Merope. She is the youngest of the seven Pleiades, daughters of Atlas and Pleione in Greek mythology. The Pleiades, along with their half-sisters the Hyades, were companions to the goddess Artemis. Orion pursued the Pleiades after he fell in love with their beauty and grace. Artemis asked Zeus to protect the Pleiades and in turn, Zeus turned them into stars.
    Archer is the faintest of the stars because she was the only one of the Pleiades to have married a mortal. Her sisters had relations with gods and bore them sons, but Archer irresponsible married Sisyphus and lived on the island Chios. She gave birth to Glaukos, Ornytion, Almus, Thersander and Sinon. The star that represents Archer is often called the "lost Pleiad" because she was at first not seen by astronomers or charted like her sisters.



    personality


    Archer is rather shy. Because of constantly living in the shadow of her more successful sisters, she has developed a little bit of a complex and doesn't really see herself in a great light. Still, she greatly admires her sisters and remembers fondly of their time hunting together.
    She loathes having to work alone, preferring to have a partner she can trust. She isn't very fond of overly muscular men, however, as they remember her of a certain guy who didn't know the meaning of the word "no".
    Her greatest regret was marrying a guy who, in hindsight, wasn't that great. If she was given the chance, her wish to the grail would be to return to the time before she and her sisters were divided and stay like that forever.

    Last edited by the god of world-0; March 26th, 2020 at 09:15 AM.


    here is a list of my servant sheets(new and improved format for my servant sheets)

  2. #362
    Trace: Overcringe King of Padoru's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RoydGolden View Post
    Mizuhame/Tatsugoro: This feels kind of like the Promare reference to my Nameless Hikeshi's Fire Force reference. Though I have to say yours seems better fleshed out overall, with more original ideas that stand apart from the source material inspiration. Having the Matoi literally call on rain when swung is a cool idea and serves as a fitting crystallization of his legend, more creative than what I came up with. His personality is quite adorable, where he's basically a sweet-natured cinnamon roll of a man who tries to act like a hotblooded badass because he feels that's the way heroes should be.
    I have to admit that your Nameless Hikeshi contributed to inspire me with this sheet too, and motivated me to learn more about Hikeshi. If it weren't because of it, the result would probably have been more bland.

    Quote Originally Posted by WhiteFrenzy View Post
    Anyway, I'd also like to thank King of Padoru for the compliments on my sheet, thank you very much!
    And lemme say that I read your sheet and as Royd said beautifully, "he's basically a sweet-natured cinnamon roll of a man who tries to act like a hotblooded badass because he feels that's the way heroes should be" AND THAT'S ADORABLE. I can totally see the Promare inspiration coming out of this sheet (not only the FC), and that was so cool. You've perfectly married the concept of a rain deity and a firefighter. Mizuhame is amazing, and a part that I especially loved was those "yakuza" roots of his. I didn't knew that detail at all, that the Hikeshi were like the predecesors of them. Fate/Sheets truly are elucidating sometimes hahaha.
    You're welcome!
    I used this page to find information about Hikeshi, you should have a look at it if you want to know a bit more about them: https://toshidama.wordpress.com/2013...ndards-of-edo/.

    Thank you two for the compliments, and glad you liked Mizuhame!



    Merope: I like how you've referenced the seven Pleiades even if the Servant is only one of them. It's different from the Valkyries but it still works. I also like how Orion's flirting has impacted her character.
    I can imagine what happened after he encountered her and her sisters:

    RIP Grand Archer, you'll be missed
    Last edited by King of Padoru; March 22nd, 2020 at 08:42 AM.

  3. #363
    死徒 Dead Apostle Kabalisto Koga's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bird of Hermes View Post
    Update with Elaine: Added a new Noble Phantasm to better explain the forcible possession and obtaining new skills. Also added the Shapeshift​ skill.
    She is really good ! That is the first servant that let my spine shiver a bit .

    i know you said that you for an while but could you be so Kind to read my sheet i made a while ago as contribution of he Archer class theme contest >HErmes Trismegistos because i have tried to weave "him" in the nasu verse carefully and i want to know if it blends good in the nasu verse lore ?
    When you wake a Dragon in his Lair...





  4. #364
    love warrior <3 world-0 the god of world-0's Avatar
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    Lancer of Thebes

    "I am Lancer, nice to meet you. Now that we are introduced, you better stay far away from me if you don't want constant bad luck in your life."



    Class: Lancer
    Alignment: True/Neutral
    Region: Greece
    Height: 62kg
    Weight: 160cm
    Likes: his wife, traveling, not causing problems for those he cares about
    Dislikes: monsters, his luck, staying in the same place for long.
    Talent: monster-slaying
    Armaments: Spear
    Natural Enemy: Ares

    stats

    Str: C
    End: B
    Agi: C
    Mna: D
    Lck: E
    NP: B

    Skills


    class skills

    Magic resistance(B): Cancel spells with a chant below three verses. Even if targeted by High-Thaumaturgy and Greater Rituals, it is difficult for a Servant to be affected.

    personal skills

    Dragon Slayer(B): A special Skill provided for those who have taken down a member of the Dragon Kind. It is not a talent given from heaven, but from killing a dragon. It can be said that the anecdotes themselves have become this Skill.

    Charisma(C): A composite Skill consisting of a person's charm as well as the natural talent to command or unify an army or country. Increases the ability of allies during group battles.

    Curse of Harmony(A): A curse of ill-fortune that Lancer shares with his wife, the goddess Harmonia. It causes the Luck stat of Lancer and everyone around him to be set at E rank, along with nullifying any luck boosting skills of the same or lower ranks. Basically, so long as Lancer is at a location, it becomes an area of sole misfortune.



    Noble phantasm


    Original Earth-Born Warriors
    Thebai Spartoi

    rank: Anti-Group, C

    A Noble Phantasm representing the anecdote ware, following the advice of the goddess Athena, Lancer planted the tooths of the dragon he had defeated and they germinated into warriors.
    Unlike the Magecraft used by a certain witch of betrayal, This Noble Phantasm prioritizes quality over quantity. As such, Lancer can only ever summon five Dragon-tooth warriors at the same time. In exchange, they are of much higher strength than other exemplars of their kind.
    These warriors have the equivalent power of a low-level servant and are equipped with nameless Noble Phantasms of their own. They also have a degree of self-intelligence, allowing for autonomous actions in situations where Lancer may be unable to provide direct orders.

    The Spring Dragon Reborn
    Drakon Ismenios

    rank: Transformation, A

    Lancer's secret Noble Phantasm. A manifestation of the Legend where Lancer, at the end of his life, became the same monster he once defeated. It is an automatic type Noble Phantasm that activates at the moment he takes lethal damage, Initiating a metamorphosis into a member of the Dragon-kind. A green-scaled, vaguely humanoid monster with long claws and sharp teeth, almost twice the size Lancer previously had.
    The transformation will seal all of Lancer's previous skills as well as his other Noble Phantasm. They are replaced with the Skills Madness Enhancement at rank A, Monstrous Strength at rank A, Battle Continuation at rank B and Mana Burst(water) at rank B. Furthermore, he also gains access to a power Breath-weapon of the poison variety.
    Needless to say, it is a powerful but extremely dangerous Noble Phantasm that essentially turns this Servant from a reliable Lancer to an uncontrollable being more akin to a Berserker.



    Background

    Lancer is the Greek hero Cadmus, the first king of Thebes and Greeks one who brought the writing and the alphabet from the Phoenicians to the Greeks. He is the son of the Phoenician king Agenor and brother of Europa.
    When his sister was carried off by Zeus, king of the gods, Lancer was sent out to find her. However, he was unsuccessful. He consulted the Delphic oracle, which ordered him to give up his quest, follow a cow, and build a town on the spot where she lay down. The cow guided him to Boeotia, where he founded the city of Thebes.
    Lancer decided to sacrifice the cow to Athena and asked his companions to bring water from a nearby spring. There, a water-dragon killed all of them, but Lancer eventually managed to kill the beast. Following Athena&apos;s advice, he took the teeth of the dragon and placed them in the soil, out of which a legion of fierce men, the Spartoi, sprang out. They started battling each other until only the five strongest survived, with whom Lancer built the city.
    The dragon, however, was protected by the god of war, Ares, who demanded that Lancer serve him for eight years. After that period, Lancer married Harmonia at the gods' request. in their wedding, Harmonia received a necklace from Hephaestus, the so-called Necklace of Harmonia, which brought ill fortune to anyone who possessed it. This brought maladies both to Lancer's family and his city.
    In the end, Lancer and Harmonia left Thebes and went to the region of Illyria. Lancer, worn out by the ill fate that the gods had brought upon him for killing the dragon, wished that he transform into a serpent himself, his wish was granted and he started growing scales immediately. Harmonia then asked for the same fate as her husband, and it was also granted.



    personality


    Lance is a chill guy, but he has a tendency to stay away from people. It's not that he doesn't like the company, he just thinks that it is the best for everyone. For him, the best Master would be one who stays as far away as possible. It is for this exact same reason that he also avoids staying in the same place for long.
    Despite all the hardships that he faced in life, Lancer doesn't think that he should have done anything differently. Proof of that is that he still very much loves his wife, despite all the difficulties marrying her brought, and honestly hopes to see her again someday.



    here is a list of my servant sheets(new and improved format for my servant sheets)

  5. #365
    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six Zork Knight's Avatar
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    Rank A feels too small for dragon transformation when compared to Kiyohime's EX

  6. #366
    love warrior <3 world-0 the god of world-0's Avatar
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    I guess? Maybe I should bump it up, but I really don't feel that it has the power of a EX NP.


    here is a list of my servant sheets(new and improved format for my servant sheets)

  7. #367
    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six Zork Knight's Avatar
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    Neither does Kiyohime's transformarion I believe

    The EX is probably due to dragons being special and such

  8. #368
    リビングデッド Living Dead BnEl15's Avatar
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    Avenger of the Cheyenne
    "Servant Avenger. Please do not be alarmed, Master. Despite my appearance, I prefer to avoid conflict if we can help it. Hm? Do I not look like an Avenger? Haha, maybe so..."


    Source

    Under the effects of his Noble Phantasm


    Class: Avenger
    Other Classes: Archer, Caster

    True Name: Black Kettle
    Alignment: Lawful Neutral
    Origin: America (19th century), Native American Mythology


    Parameters:

    STR: D+
    END: B
    AGI: C
    MGI: C+
    LCK: D
    NP: B

    Likes: Family, traditions
    Dislikes: Betrayal
    Talent: Diplomacy
    Natural Enemy: John M. Chivington, Abraham Lincoln
    Armament: Bow and arrow, magecraft
    Catalyst: The shredded remains of a certain American flag
    Class Skills
    Avenger
    Rank: C

    A skill representing the state of an Avenger as one that gathers people's hatreds and grudges onto oneself. It is easier for one to accumulate hatred and resentment. Unlike many others under the same class, Avenger possesses this skill at a low rank, due to the specific nature of his hatred. His demeanor is also quite unlike that of an Avenger, being a wise, kindly old man instead of an individual brimming with resentment. Yet he qualifies for this class for a reason. Should he meet "them" again... or should he experience something like "that" again... He vows to execute his vengeance this time around.

    Oblivion Correction
    Rank: B

    People are creatures that forget many things, but an Avenger never forgets. The critical effect of Avengers who attack from beyond one's memory is strengthened. Avenger wished for nothing more than peace between native settlers and the local government. He repeatedly facilitated peaceful discourses and treaties, despite oftentimes receiving unfavorable results for his tribe. Ultimately, all of his attempts were repaid with betrayal, a bloody massacre that took the lives of more than a hundred of his tribe members, including women and children. Come what may, Avenger may never forget this hatred.

    Self-Replenishment (Mana)
    Rank: D

    One's magical energy endlessly surges until their revenge is accomplished. Recovers a minuscule amount of magical energy every turn.

    Personal Skills
    Charisma
    Rank: C

    A composite skill consisting of a person's charm as well as the natural talent to command or unify an army or country. Avenger was a chief of an organization known as the Council of Forty Four, the central government of the Cheyenne tribe. While the tribe is much smaller than a kingdom, Avenger is still capable of leading a decently large group of people.

    Shamanism
    Rank: B+

    A skill to enter dialogue with spirits passed down by Native American tribes. By contract, Avenger may temporarily borrow the power of spirits in a manner similar to magecraft. Of course, the strongest one among them is known as the Héstova'éhe, a low-ranking demonic beast from Cheyenne mythology. The beast took the form of a vicious, two-faced ogre whose existence is fused to Avenger's Saint Graph, strengthening it.

    Monstrous Strength
    Rank: C-

    A skill that temporarily grants a rank-up to one's strength parameter for a time limit determined by the ranking of this skill. A skill belonging not to Avenger, but to Héstova'éhe. By spending some mana, it is possible for Avenger to gain a temporary boost to his strength. However, using this power for long periods of time presents the risk of Héstova'éhe taking over his Saint Graph, turning him into a rampaging monster.

    Flag of Understanding
    Rank: A

    An American flag given to Avenger by the American government, on behalf of President Abraham Lincoln. The flag signifies friendship between the Cheyenne and the government, and according to the local officers, as long as the Cheyenne settlement flies that flag, no harm would come upon them from the American government.

    ...Or that's how it was supposed to be. Everything changed on that night, a betrayal committed by one belligerent officer. Roughly 700 men assaulted the Cheyenne settlement, massacring anything in sight. At the time, most of the warriors were out hunting, making the settlement an easy target. During this time, it was said that Avenger frantically flew the flag, begging for the chaos to stop. His desperate pleas went unheard, and the incident became known as the Sand Creek Massacre, where an army of heavily armed soldiers annihilated most of the Cheyenne tribe.

    This skill represents Avenger's undying will to reach for peace, using violence only as an absolute last resort. This skill reduces hostile emotions from his surroundings, opening an opportunity for negotiations instead of spilling blood. Servants will also find their strength parameter significantly reduced when within Avenger's vicinity. Yet akin to his experience in life, those with strong enough hatred towards Avenger may be completely unaffected by this skill. In which case, should Avenger's generous offer for peace be repaid with blood once again... Perhaps one may finally see why he qualifies for the class.

    Noble Phantasm(s)
    Second Face of the Gentle Chief
    Héstova'éhe

    Type: Anti-Unit (self)
    Rank: B
    Range: 1
    Max Targets: 1

    Avenger's Noble Phantasm, usable by temporarily surrendering himself to the demonic beast Héstova'éhe. This Noble Phantasm combines Avenger's personal hatred with legends of Héstova'éhe, an ogre with two faces, whose second face is said to paralyze those who gaze upon them with deep fear, if not killing them outright. Upon its activation, Avenger's body undergoes a transformation into that of a terrifying ogre's, boosting his parameters significantly. As long as he doesn't overexert himself, Avenger remains fully in control of his thoughts and actions under this form. Yet while the transformation is unsettling enough, nothing is more terrifying than his face. His face, normally obscured under this form, constantly changes between the people whose lives were lost during the Sand Creek Massacre, their voices sounding in disturbing unison whenever he speaks. Looking into Avenger's face in this form elicits feelings of unbearable fear, sorrow, and powerlessness, paralyzing the targets in place if they don't possess certain mental fortification skills. This Noble Phantasm's effects would become even stronger if the target had betrayed Avenger's trust in some way, although it is uncertain whether this is an additional effect stemming from Avenger's life, or if Avenger himself simply puts more effort in overwhelming the target.

    Description
    Avenger's True Name is Black Kettle, a prominent leader of the Southern Cheyenne tribe during the American-Indian Wars. He has formed a contract of sorts with Héstova'éhe, a terrifying beast from Cheyenne mythology. An Avenger in the loosest meaning of the term, Avenger is a pacifistic, wise old man who resents conflict, preferring to orchestrate negotiations and treaties and using violence only as an absolute last resort. He is capable of giving a number of larger-than-life advice, and has a soft spot for children, acting like a caring grandparent around them.

    Yet of course, he's not called an Avenger for nothing. While he is fond of forming alliances for mutual benefits, he resents betrayal above all else. Due to fear of losing anything important to him, any sign of betrayal from his supposed allies will be met with swift annihilation. Yet unlike most others in the same class, Avenger's hatred is unlike a roaring, rampaging flame. His vengeance is calm and ruthless. He rarely speaks of it, and is normally tolerating of others, yet the moment someone betrays his trust, he punishes them with the utmost brutality, all of it done while maintaining a serene expression with only a tinge of disappointment in his voice.

    Due to his prior experiences, Avenger is innately distrustful towards Americans, yet at the same time, he chastises himself for these feelings, believing himself to be no different than those invaders if he starts having prejudice towards others without getting to know them better first. Thus, he tries to grant his trust equally to anyone, as long as their actions don't warrant suspicion from him.

    Avenger's wish to the Grail would be to allow those who perished during the massacre to rest in peace, and apologize for not being able to stop the tragedy before it happened.


    Lore
    Black Kettle

    Black Kettle (Cheyenne: Mo'ohtavetoo'o) (1803-1868) was a prominent leader of the Southern Cheyenne during the American Indian Wars. He is often remembered as a peacemaker who accepted treaties with the U.S. Government to protect his people.

    Little is known regarding Black Kettle's life before 1854, when he was made a chief of the Council of Forty-four, the central government of the Cheyenne tribe. The Council met regularly at the Sun Dance gatherings, where they affirmed unity.

    After 1851, relations between the Cheyenne and the U.S. government were nominally conducted under the Treaty of Fort Laramie. Still, the U.S. government remained unwilling to control white expansion into the Great Plains, particularly after the Pike's Peak Gold Rush began in 1859. European Americans displaced the Cheyenne from their lands in violation of the treaty, and consumed important resources of water and game. Increasing competition eventually led to armed conflict between the groups.


    Chief Black Kettle was a pragmatist who believed that U.S. military power and the number of immigrants were overwhelming and unable to be resisted. Thus, for the safety of his people, it would be better to enter negotiations with the government, despite receiving a number of unfavorable results, forcing the Cheyenne to constantly relocate their settlement, their territories gradually taken by the government. During one of these treaties, it was said that Black Kettle received an American flag from the U.S. Government, on behalf of Abraham Lincoln. As long as the Cheyenne flies the flag, no harm would come to them from the U.S. Government.


    Tensions between Americans and Indians reached their boiling point on summer 1864, where a number of Indians, dissatisfied with the disadvantageous treaties imposed upon them by the government, raided American settlements, occasionally taking captives and murdering townspeople. To combat this,Colorado Governor John Evans formed the Third Colorado Cavalry, a band of soldiers enlisted for 100 days to fight against hostile Indians. The cavalry was led by Colonel John M. Chivington.

    Ultimately, Chivington and his army was unable to find the hostile Indians responsible for the raids on the town. Their 100-day enlistment contract is about to expire, and Chivington felt compelled to at least use them in some way before the time is up. It was then that he came across the Southern Cheyenne settlement.

    At dawn on November 29, Chivington attacked the Sand Creek reservation; the event became known as the Sand Creek massacre. Most of the warriors were out hunting. Following instructions from the U.S. Government, Black Kettle frantically flew an American flag and a white flag from his tipi, but the signal was ignored. The 3rd Colorado Cavalry killed 163 Cheyenne by shooting or stabbing. They burned down the village encampment. Most of the victims were women and children. For months afterward, members of the militia displayed trophies in Denver of their battle, including body parts they had taken for souvenirs.

    Black Kettle barely escaped the massacre. His wife was severely injured, and many of his people dead. His trust in the Americans he once called allies was severely shaken, yet despite of that, when demands for retaliation grew even larger, he continued to promote pacifism, believing that an all-out war would only end in American victory and absolute decimation of their tribe.

    At the time, Black Kettle said:
    "Although wrongs have been done me, I live in hopes. I have not got two hearts.... I once thought that I was the only man that persevered to be the friend of the white man, but since they have come and cleaned out our lodges, horses, and everything else, it is hard for me to believe white men any more."

    After the massacre, Black Kettle continued to sign treaties, hoping to protect his people. Even as his influence waned in his community, and more militant leaders gained more influence, he resolved to find a peaceful way to stop the conflict.

    Yet all of his efforts ended in vain. On November 1868, two days before the fourth anniversary of the Sand Creek massacre, Black Kettle and his wife was killed by gunshot wounds when the U.S. Government attacked their settlement once again, in response to continued raids committed by the Cheyenne's militant leaders. More than a hundred Native Americans also lost their lives on that day. As the light leaves his eyes, Black Kettle mourned the lives lost, believing all of his efforts to mean nothing. Yet at the same time, he resents the reality that there is no way for the Cheyenne to defeat the Americans in both massacres. He wished for retribution, death to those who wronged him and his people, and ultimately, a chance for his people to live in peace.

    It was then, just before his demise, that something answered his prayers.

    Héstova'éhe

    Héstova'éhe is a malevolent humanoid monster in Cheyenne mythology, it also appears in legends of other tribes under different names. Héstova'éhe is often described as an ogre, although in some versions of the myth it is described as resembling a human except having a second face on the back side of its head. It was said that this second face is so terrifying that anyone who witnesses it would be paralyzed with fear until it returns to murder them. The misdeeds of Héstova'éhe ranges from murdering and mutilating people, to cannibalism, to kidnapping or even just frightening misbehaving children.


    Relationships
    Geronimo:
    "A warrior of the Apache who fought against the white men. While I cannot say anything regarding your methods, allow me to commend my respect for you."

    Boudica:
    "Your daughters, huh... Fate truly is cruel sometimes. You have my deepest sympathies."

    Child Servants:
    "Ah, there are children here, I see... Alright, gather around! I have some tales I can tell you from my homeland."

    John M. Chivington:
    *He would transform into Héstova'éhe without a word and try to kill him immediately*

    Abraham Lincoln:
    "President Lincoln... While you were nowhere to be seen following the massacre, I continued to believe. Perhaps you were busy at the time, or you had other affairs to take care of. As hard as it is for me, I forgive you for that. Yet even after my passing, Colonel Chivington remains unpunished. That is the one I cannot forgive. Tell me, to you, or any of your successors... Do our lives mean that little to you? Does this flag even mean anything at all..?"
    Feel free to look at my Servant sheets here.

  9. #369
    Some unsurprisingly heavy stuff in that Black Kettle sheet, but it's overall good. I particularly like his characterization and how you incorporated the Hestova'ehe. I can see him chiding a traitor as if he were their disappointed father as he attempts to rip them open.

  10. #370
    神秘 Obscure Shiki-pon's Avatar
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    FC Link
    Alternate Classes: Assassin
    True Name: Espen Askeladd
    Alignment: Chaotic Good
    Origin: Scandinavian Folklore
    Armament: Various

    Parameters:
    STR: D
    END: D
    AGI: C
    MANA: D
    LUCK: EX
    NP: C

    Skills
    Class Skills

    Magic Resistance - Rank D: Grants protection against magical effects. Differing from the Resistance effect that merely rejects Magical Energy, this ability cancels the spells altogether.
    Cancels Single-Action spells. Magic Resistance of the same degree of an amulet that rejects magical energy.

    Riding - Rank A: A Class Skill of Rider and Saber class Servants, denoting the ability to ride mounts and vehicles. Rider-class Servants will typically possess a high rank. It is said that dragon type mounts are an exception, requiring a different ability other than Riding.
    All vehicles and all creatures but those of Phantasmal Beast and Divine Beast-rank can be used as mounts. This rank is high enough to have an aptitude for the Rider Class.

    Personal Skills

    Giant Beast Hunt - Rank B+: A Skill that denotes having abundant combat experience against giant enemy lifeforms.
    There are several stories regarding Rider’s killing of all manner of great monsters. Due to his prowess as a troll slayer, however, he gains an additional bonus to damage against Giants, Trolls and similar creatures. Due to relying on guile rather than simple strength in order to defeat such foes, Rider's defensive abilities are also slightly increased when facing his chosen foes.

    Successful Youngest Son - Rank B+: A peculiar Skill that marks the user as the youngest of a set of siblings. In such stories, the youngest child often prevails in whatever trial their elders have failed in. Accordingly, the user gains bonuses to actions that others have attempted and failed in before. As a side effect, their appearance is locked to that which they sported in their youth.
    Rider is famed in stories as always succeeding at tasks where his elder siblings failed. An attempted task can be something like “defeating a specific opponent”, “finding an important person” and so forth. Rider does not need to be aware of the actions of others regarding his chosen task in order to receive the benefits of Successful Youngest Son.

    Ash Lad - Rank C: The quality of a fool covered in ash. Seeming like an idiot, their true talents are obscured. Ash Lad manifests as a disguise technique, allowing the user to alter their appearance through expenditure of magical energy. It is possible, if costly, to fully change one’s appearance as a Servant, to the point of hiding their parameters.
    Rider was often underestimated due to his dirty appearance from playing with ash all day, which worked to his advantage more often than not.

    Noble Phantasms

    The Fool’s Bag of Tricks
    Tullings Reise

    Anti-Unit (Self), Rank D
    A Noble Phantasm representing the myriad tales Rider serves as the protagonist of. In these stories, he will come across or otherwise come to possess exactly what is needed to carry the day. In essence, Tullings Reise acts as a “bag of tricks”, allowing Rider to respond to just about any situation. However, rather than an invincible armory, it is merely something that tilts things in Rider’s favor.
    Contained within Tullings Reise are magical mounts, monstrous trolls, mystical potions as well as pieces of armor and weaponry with varied qualities. Tullings Reise also allows Rider to borrow abilities shared by his companions in story, though at a lesser degree of effectiveness when compared to the original holder. No matter what is manifested through Tullings Reise, however, any article inside can be used only once. There is also a limit on how many different manifestations of the Noble Phantasm can be utilized at once, but this varies depending on the creatures and objects in question.
    Generally, weapons and armor drawn from Tullings Reise are at best equivalent to Noble Phantasms of E~D rank. A few of the creatures within hold power equivalent to Phantasmal Beasts, but Rider has some problems in exerting control over them.

    The Ship that Sails the Skies
    Flygende Seilskute

    Anti-Army (Self), Rank C
    A Noble Phantasm based on one of Rider’s more famous adventures. It is a flying viking longship, crafted for his use by a mysterious traveler. Oddly for a Rider-class Servant, Rider possesses no true control over Flygende Seilskute, and the ship sails itself without need to expend magical energy beyond its summoning cost.
    Rather than being guided by Rider, Flygende Seilskute simply sails toward ‘an optimal destination’. This can be a weakened foe, a surefire escape route or something Rider himself is not even aware of. The ship also possesses mystical defenses, allowing it to reject would-be boarders. If someone not invited on board by Rider should try to come aboard, they would have to exert significant force in order to break through the repelling effect.
    Once Flygende Seilskute has ferried Rider and his companions to their destination, the ship automatically dematerializes.

    Description
    Likes: Adventure, doing things at his own pace
    Dislikes: Superficial people, trolls
    Talents: Succeeding where others have failed, fireplace tending
    Natural Enemy: N/A

    Rider’s true identity is Espen Askeladd, the Fortunate Third Son. He also goes by many other names, most famous among them Per Gynt, though this may be an act of misdirection on his part.

    Askeladd is an odd, quiet boy. There does not seem to be anything particularly striking about him, other than his ash-strewn appearance, but he has a strange way of finding success at whatever he does. Askeladd does not talk much, speaking mostly when spoken to, and appears ignorant or reticent regarding most things.
    Under his shell, however, Askeladd is an earnest child with a yearning for adventure. If he is treated based on his appearance, he often shuts up and just decides to play according to the expectations of others, almost as though he is moping. He is rather cunning, and usually manages to trip up those that treat him like simpleton. In fact, especially if he is treated poorly by such people, Askeladd quite enjoys such mischief.
    As they are great heroes, Askeladd greatly admires Heroic Spirits. He has a sense of naivety that allows him to find respectable qualities in even the most heinous of villains, as though he does not understand the wickedness of their past deeds. A worrying aspect of this innocence is that with his sense of guile, Askeladd might grow to become quite a formidable villain himself. Should Askeladd find a Servant that treats him as a person, rather than as a tool or an enemy, he would most likely latch onto them and seek to become their protege.
    As long as he is treated as a Servant or glorified familiar, Askeladd cannot reach his full potential. Under an understanding and encouraging Master, Askeladd can truly become a force to be reckoned with, however. He has a fondness for people who have yet to become set in their ways or who possess an unorthodox way of doing things.
    Askeladd’s wish to the Holy Grail is to be allowed to go on an adventure. Naturally, he would also much like to bring along any friends and companions he has found along the way.

    Lore
    Espen Askeladd is an archetypal figure of Norwegian folklore. He is apparently lazy and naïve, but during the course of his adventures, he proves himself to be imaginative and resourceful. He always kills the troll; he always wins the princess and half the kingdom, to boot.
    In many folk tales, Askeladd is portrayed as the youngest of three brothers. Early in a typical tale, the older brothers appear to have much greater chances of success in life. For example, one brother might be extremely well read, whereas another might be extremely competent in another area. In contrast, Askeladd is looked down upon as a seemingly drowsy ne'er do well, perhaps even as a loner or misunderstood eccentric, who spends too much time sitting by the fireplace lost in thought as he is poking the ashes.
    As the typical story unfolds, the oldest brothers try first to heroically overcome some major crisis or problem. The two older brothers, who are tied to conventional thinking, typically fall flat on their faces. In contrast, it is Askeladd who comes up with creative solutions. He is smarter, more tactical, more receptive and more aware of the needs of others. He outwits trolls, dodges charging unicorns or gets a magic Viking ship to transport him where he needs to.

    Notes
    Not really too pleased with this one either, though I guess I can chalk that up to the rather long break I've been having.
    Last edited by Shiki-pon; March 25th, 2020 at 07:02 PM.

  11. #371
    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six Bird of Hermes's Avatar
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    Mizuhame no Mikoto: I don't know a single thing about Promare but I can already tell that this is a loveletter to that yet also stands up on it's own merits with it's own inspiration. Also, props to you for a complete set of original skills as well. (Only downside is that he only has one buster card which runs completely against my fgo build strats.) However he's cute so I'd roll for him even if I never use him.

    Cadmus: You send out a sheet almost daily so it's hard to keep up sometimes. I've got my own Cadmus in the WIP folder so this is motivation for me to finish. Curse of Harmony is a nice touch, Charisma is kinda there and Dragonslayer is alright but given he turned into a dragon maybe Dragonkind Modification would work better? Or maybe ditch Charisma and double up on dragon skills.

    Black Kettle: Pretty sombre and heavy stuff. He strikes me as a character who'd steal the show despite a limited amount of screentime much like how Geronimo did in the American singularity. That said I still have little knowledge about native american history or american history in general so I find these sheets very interesting.

    Aspen: My only issue is that 'Troll Killer' should just be Giant Beast Hunting with a specific affinity for Trolls but the rest of the skills are damn good.
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  12. #372
    神秘 Obscure Shiki-pon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bird of Hermes View Post
    Aspen: My only issue is that 'Troll Killer' should just be Giant Beast Hunting with a specific affinity for Trolls but the rest of the skills are damn good.
    Good point. I did consider something like that, but I forgot that specific Skill existed. Changed now.

    I also now regret not having his first NP's title be "Foolbox" as a pun on toolbox.
    Last edited by Shiki-pon; March 25th, 2020 at 07:03 PM.

  13. #373
    love warrior <3 world-0 the god of world-0's Avatar
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    Thanks, Hermes. Now that you said, that charisma really is just kinda there. I wanted something to show his status as a king, maybe there is a better skill for it?


    here is a list of my servant sheets(new and improved format for my servant sheets)

  14. #374
    See you on the other side RoydGolden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by the god of world-0 View Post
    Thanks, Hermes. Now that you said, that charisma really is just kinda there. I wanted something to show his status as a king, maybe there is a better skill for it?
    I don't see the problem with Charisma. Not every Skill has to be super special and unique.

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    love warrior <3 world-0 the god of world-0's Avatar
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    Lancer of Shu Han

    "Master, Let's make an oath together!"



    Class: Lancer
    Alignment: Neutral/good
    Region: China
    Height: 170cm
    Weight: 67kg
    Likes: Peace, his brothers, peaches<br>
    Dislikes: War, traitors, brutes
    Talent: Attracting people
    Armaments: Swords, Spears
    Natural Enemy: Cao Cao, Lu Bu

    stats

    Str: B
    End: B
    Agi: B
    Mna: C
    Lck: C
    NP: A

    Skills


    class skills

    Magic Resistance(C): Cancel spells with a chant below two verses. Cannot defend against Magecraft on the level of High-Thaumaturgy and Greater Rituals.

    personal skills

    Charisma(A): A composite Skill consisting of a person's charm as well as the natural talent to command or unify an army or country. Having B Rank in this Skill is sufficient to lead a nation. The morale of military forces he commands is extremely high.

    Mandate of Heaven(B): The Tiānmìng, a skill that marks Lancer as a Son of Heaven and rightful ruler of China. It grants him a bonus to all of his stats, grants him protection against Mental interferences and also counts as Divinity of the same rank.

    Discernment of the poor(C): Insight to see through the opponent's character and attribute. As someone with the humble beginnings of a shoemaker, Lancer can easily recognize someone's worth, although his desire to believe in them may cloud his judgment.



    Noble phantasm


    Oath of the Peach Garden
    Taoyuan San Jieyi

    rank: Anti-unit, A

    A rather special Noble Phantasms that represents the Unbreakable bond with this Servant and his Sworn Brothers Guan Yu and Zhang Fei. When in the Lancer Class, it allows him to wield, along with his own, the weapons of his trusted friends. They are:

    Twin Swords
    Shuang Gu Jian
    : The Pair of Blades wielded by Lancer himself when alive. Although extremely well crafted and perfected balanced, they lack any sort Special Ability, being just really good swords and having the equivalent of rank C. It is because of their lack of noteworthiness that this Servant lacks the requirements for the Saber Class.

    Serpent Iron Pike
    She Diangang Mao
    : The 1.8 zhang long steel spear wielded by Zhang Fei. Its heavy weight, combined with the unusual shape of its tip, allows the user to Easily Disarm opponents and leave them open to counterattacks. By itself, it has the rank of B as a Noble Phantasm.

    Green Dragon Crescent Blade
    Qinglong Yan Yuedao
    : The legendary weapon wielded by Guan Yu, it is also sometimes referred to as the Frost Fair Blade, from the idea that during a battle in the snow, the blade continuously had blood on it, the blood froze and made a layer of frost on the blade. Its attacks are infused with an ice element, causing any injury dealt with it to freeze up and become unhealable, dealing continuous damage. This weapons fame largely overshadows the other two, meaning it takes precedence and is the major reason Lancer is in this class. It also has a high amount of Mystery, which gives it a Rank A as a Noble Phantasm.

    When fighting, Lancer's most used strategy is confronting the enemy with Shuang Gu Jian while looking for an opening, then disarming the opponent with She Diangang Mao and finally dealing the finishing blow with Qinglong Yan Yuedao. Should he be summoned as a Rider, this Noble Phantasm would instead briefly Invoke Guan Yu and Zhang Fei themselves to wield their weapons in a combined attack, like the one once used against the famous Lu Bu.



    Background


    Lancer's identity is that of Liu Bei, courtesy name Xuande. He is a warlord in the late Eastern Han dynasty who founded the state of Shu Han in the Three Kingdoms period and became its first ruler.
    He was known to have been an ambitious and charismatic leader who had the affable power to draw people to him. In the novel, Romance of the Three Kingdoms, he is famously depicted as a modest and merciful warlord who cherished his devoted followers.
    Having risen up from the commoner class, he was initially a small player in the massive civil war leading up to the collapse of the Eastern Han Dynasty. In 214 AD, using the stratagems of his chief advisor Zhuge Liang, Lancer conquered Yizhou (present-day Sichuan and Guizhou) and at last established the foundation for Shu Han. In 221, Lancer declared himself emperor in an effort to carry on the lineage of the Han Dynasty. He died in the year 223, one year after the Battle of Yiling. He was succeeded by his son Liu Shan, who eventually surrendered to the rival kingdom of Wei in 263.
    Despite historians claiming that Lancer did not have any loyalty, the only people he went against were Cao Cao, Lu Bu, and Sun Quan. He also won a few notable battles such as against the Yellow Turbans, Yuan Shao at Pingyuan, Cao Cao's subordinates on multiple occasions, and being the leader against Cao Cao at Wulin and chasing him after Zhou Yu's fire attack, which is noted in Records of the Three Kingdoms. Regardless, he was often cited for his charisma and determination, which was often enough to get him back on his feet despite the constant setbacks in a majority of his other campaigns.



    personality


    is a virtuous and benevolent man who really just wants peace. He is normally polite and modest to anyone he meets and, being highly empathetic with the common folk, can easily gain the people's trust and support. This particular trait makes him a feared adversary to his enemy Cao Cao.
    However, as a Lancer, he was summoned from quite early in his campaign. Lancer will often doubt his own abilities as a ruler and warrior and is prone to angst and doubt if there are too many deaths on either side of the field. He sometimes lacks emotional restraint as he will lose his temperament and sound judgment if the people he cares for are routed or killed. He thinks highly of his brothers and always addresses them by their style names.

    Last edited by the god of world-0; March 27th, 2020 at 11:19 PM.


    here is a list of my servant sheets(new and improved format for my servant sheets)

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    闇色の六王権 The Dark Six Bird of Hermes's Avatar
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    Liu Bei: seems ok, the Taoyuan San Jieyi NP allows for some versatility and variety however it feels like it lacks an NP that belongs solely to the character. The problem with that NP means that it feels like it can be tacked onto a number of characters rather than something that makes it feel unique. I'd recommend looking at Royd's take on the dude. It's an oldie but the NP's hold up.
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  17. #377
    love warrior <3 world-0 the god of world-0's Avatar
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    Oh, I know about Royd's Sheet. It gave me the idea for the Skill Mandate of Heaven when I was struggling to reconcile Imperial privilege and Lancer's personality. The thing is, it is kind of hard to pull many things from it since they are such opposites you know. Still, thanks for the advice. I will keep it in mind when I eventually make his Rider version.


    here is a list of my servant sheets(new and improved format for my servant sheets)

  18. #378
    屍食鬼 Ghoul arrowofsky's Avatar
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    Source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ashina_Jiesheshuai

    Class: Assassin
    Other Classes: Rider, Archer
    True Name: Ashina Jiesheshuai
    Alignment: Lawful, Evil
    Place of Origin: Central Asia-China

    Parameters and Characteristics
    STR: C
    END: B+
    AGI: B
    MGI: E
    LCK: C
    NP: C to B

    Height: 170 cm
    Weight: 60 kg
    Gender: Male
    Likes: Riding, conversation, team work
    Dislikes: being ignored
    Talent: Riding, archery, commanding, persuasion
    Natural Enemy: Emperor Taizong
    Armament: Bow, quiver, two short swords, leather armor or long cloak
    Catalyst: bow remnant under 5 meter depth of soil near to Wei River, Shaanxi


    Skills

    Class Skills:

    Independent Action (Rank C+): Independent Action is the ability to remain independent even when rejecting the Magical Energy supply from one's Master; the ability that allows for action even in the absence of the Master.

    Personal Skills:

    Charisma (Rank B): Charisma is a composite Skill consisting of a person's charm as well as the natural talent to command or unify an army or country. Increases the ability of allies during group battles. Rather than relying on presence concealment and other hideous ways of many assassins(except in his Noble Phantasm "Assassination to Our Death") Jiesheshuai directly confronts his enemies and what he lacks as in assassin way, he makes up with posture, words, persuasion and courage.

    Cavalry Archer (Rank C): The Turkic tribes of the past are renowned with their ability to shooting arrows extremely accurately and rapidly while riding horses, a.k.a. Parthian shot.

    Theft of Ride (Rank C): Jieshehuai can use other servants horses or ride belongings almost as if he is their actual owner. Of course, rather than a magical trick, he either forcefully obtains them or convinces their master to dismount before.

    Noble Phantasm 1
    "With all these powers and status, who are you serving?"
    Conspiration
    Rank C - Anti-Unit
    Range - Whereever there is a servant

    Through his 9 years service of commanding armies against nomadic tribes of Central Asia for Tang Dynasty, he had seen lives flourishing and perishing, ascending and descending, shining like a northern star or being corrupted like a spoiled mushroom leftover. There are times even the hardest metal bends, there are golds even to purchase something unthinkable to attain, and there are words and ways to disrupt people's seemingly indestructible loyalty. He knows what to say who, when, how and where, and in no-time one's meek servant might be found to openly attack him/her with Jiesheshuai's assistance.
    This is a telepathic way of communication with other servants, in analogy of the intricate ways of information flow in palace for conspiration. The target servant's master will not be aware of it directly. Requires very low amount of mana and can be done multiple times to anyone. However, it only (has a chance to) work against a servant with "Independent Action" skill.

    Noble Phantasm 2

    "We eat, drink, enjoy, toil, lived this life together, now it is the time, we kill TOGETHER!"
    Assasination to Our Deaths
    Level 1
    Rank C - Anti-Army
    Range - What meets the eye's of Jiesheshuai

    Jiesheshuai is not a delinquent, he has his principles, status, dignity and of course, comrades. After the last word of the incantation, "TOGETHER" , the weather around becomes stormy, with occassional thunders and incessant rain, 20 comrades of him appears from the Palace Raid event. Each of them equally as capable as Jiesheshuai, and their unison boosts their endurance stat to level B++. Additionally, all of them including Jiesheshuai wear a long cloak which makes it impossible for enemies to distinguish him from his comrades.
    This Noble Phantasm will require more mana to sustain, and still it will have a time-limit. The death of Jiesheshuai completely destroys his other comrades as well, and the last thing to remove it is, its ascension to Level 2.


    "Looks like we are not accustomed to walk on our bare feet, HORSES!"
    Assasination to Our Deaths
    Level 2
    Rank B - Anti-Army
    Range - What meets the eye's of Jiesheshuai

    Each alive comrade of Jiesheshuai and he as well immediately mount an unarmored horse. No stat is boosted but practically their agility and endurance increases. They can perform hit-and-run and Parthian shot tactics fully, the number of arrows is limitless as long as sufficient amount of mana is supplied by Jiesheshuai through his master or other ways.
    When this stage is reached, the time-limit of this noble phantasm further reduces, and with still increasing mana consumption with horses and arrows. Literally, it is a last-ditch effort but using it on the verge of defeat or death will only accelerate them. If Jiesheshuai and comrades managed to obtain Holy Grail while this Noble Phantasm is active, they may survive. In all other cases, all of them including the servant will die.

    Background


    Historical Background:

    Ashina Jiesheshuai ( b: ? – d. 19 May 639) was a member of the Ashina clan of the Eastern Turkic Khaganate and general (Zhonglangjiang) of the Tang dynasty.
    He was one of Shibi Khan's sons and the younger brother of Ashina Shibobi (Chinese: 阿史那什钵苾), who was a vassal khagan of the Tang dynasty and used the title of Tölis Khan. Tang China defeated the Eastern Turkic khaganate, which became a vassal of Tang China in 630. During this period, some Turkic nobles were members of the Chinese army. Ashina Jiesheshuai was among these nobles. By summer 639, as Ashina Jiesheshuai had not been favored by Emperor Taizong (because he had falsely accused his brother Ashina Shibobi of treason, which Emperor Taizong found despicable), he formed a conspiracy with Ashina Shibobi's son Ashina Hexiangu (Chinese: 阿史那賀暹鶻) to assassinate Emperor Taizong at his summer palace, Jiucheng Palace (九成宮, in modern Linyou County, Shaanxi). They had planned to wait for Li Zhi, the Prince of Jin, to depart from the palace in the morning and use that opportunity to attack the palace. On the day they planned, May 19, Li Zhi did not leave the palace due to a storm. Ashina Jiesheshuai attacked the palace anyway, engaging the palace guards, but the guards were supported by troops who came outside. Ashina Jiesheshuai and his comrades stole some 20 horses from the stable. They fled to the north, but were caught by pursuers near the Wei River and killed. Ashina Hexiangu was exiled to Lingbiao.
    Story


    ...steppes...a breeze blew through but not strong enough to disrupt the serenity...then some vibration on the soil...thousands of horses were galloping on the horizon with a huge dust behind...suddenly he felt near to them...nearer...nearer...and now one of the horseman was him. A teenager he was, but capable of riding horses that much. Arrows flying, swords clashing, blood spilling, people passing away...it felt as a trivial, common thing to Jiesheshuai, except that his father, Shibi, died at that raid and life started to be quite different...that time an arrow was about to hit his nose and he suddenly woke up in sweats.

    This was the only remnant of Jiesheshuai's childhood. He does not want to remember those years anymore, and not forced to see this dream almost every night. Losing his father that time, he started to distance himself from everyone as things kept going on very smoothly, like nothing happened, even to his brother. Kinship, friendship faded gradually. The days started to pass by herding animals, hunting, training Parthian shot and with some survival necessities. He was growing, becoming stronger and firmer, maybe more dependable, but something was lacking, some subtle thing...

    One eventual thing is that there was a growing interaction with Chinese, they looked weak and strong, oscillating between them. But they have a solid foundation of culture and every other thing, and a massive population. Once he daydreamed like having an army of 8 million Chinese warriors and conquering all the known world. Of course, there won't be anything like that. Still, China attracted him. He started to communicate with people who both know Chinese language and his Turkic language at that time and started to learn to speak in Chinese as well. Two language, two people, it occured to him that there are far more things to see and care in this world than only herding animals and killing people.

    The fate created the opportunity. Emperor Taizong of China at that time was merciful and cosmopolitan, with sympathy against nomadic ways and culture, and of course utilizing these as much as he can so that his influence grows over Central Asia as well. Year 630 A.D. was the demolition of Jiesheshuai's khaganate, and his transfer to Tand Dynasty. With his calm and trustworthy manner, exceptional war talent and ability to see through people, as he was watching them afar for years, it did not take long to appoint him as military commander. Under this title, what was being done is continuously scheming and warring to push the boundaries to north and fight the nomadic people there. And he started to be center of attention, a thing that he never knew in Khaganate years and quite enjoyed here. Two years later, his brother Shibobi died on the way to Chinese capital, he did not do anything particular about this. But this was kept in mind of others...

    Things were different here, unlike nomadic people, Chinese spoke much more and used much more words, sentences and meanings. At first, he found this ridiculous and meaningless. Later he started to be overwhelmed by their interaction speed volume of information exchanged in a given time. But finally, he started to become like them. He kept thinking, solving the mysteries, intricacies of the power dynamics in both his milieu and in palace. He slowly started to use these dynamics on his advantage, to make himself more influential. The people who he could not startle with his archery skill, got drawn to him by the knowledge they would like to know about their adversaries. Sometimes, Jiesheshuai also be amazed by some properties of other people, and he established his connection with them as well. As it was like a star collection, they started to do things all together. They would practice riding, archery, Parthian shot and even oratorship together, and they grew familiar with themselves, always trying to improve both themselves and each other. But Jiesheshuai found this insecure, getting more familiar might look a stranger cute and well but in the eyes of palace, the rivers would flow anti-gravitationally. So he started to put random people in his collective activities as well, in total he was always with more than 100 people whatever activity of merit he does. He realized that there were Chineses taking Parthian shot even better than him, and also some other were slightly better than him in the other ways. He left the pleasures of the life aside completely and started to train alone sometimes to surpass everyone. Yet this was no joke, being the best was not that easy anymore. Fortunately he still got the attention he seeks from the people so he did not need to feel bad about his distance to his ideal, or hold grudges against the people who is more talented.

    This kind of connections did not actually make him more sociable or less alone, yet he filled a certain gap in his heart. He started to feel the warmth of comradeship. He was a realist, that with certain push everyone may change their attitudes 180 degree, so he never expected an unbreakable friendship or invincible loyalties.

    And the calendar showed 639 A.D. At a palace ceremony, Emperor Taizong favored this people and that, but overlooked him completely. This, was speculated later as done due to Jiesheshuai blamed his late brother for treason. But at that instant, he barely kept his cool while his mind was entirely shaken. A few days passed and he found no way of return, he kept seeing the dream he was always seeing, with additional scenes of insolence from weak Chinese emperors, ministers and stuff. There is a visible interest loss on his trainings and activities as well. Without further ado, he found that with the people who he can still influence, he would take that Taizong hostage and put another person in his place so that the history will completely be overwritten in favor of him, among many other benefits on his side.

    He knew that the longer you plan a rebellion, the less chance it will have for success. The quickest he can have as assitants in this undertaking seemed to be 40 people. Sometimes openly, sometimes with innuendos, he sway these people to his side. He planned to ambush palace Emperor Taizong resided after a prince, Li Zhi left it with his army. Days passed and still he did not left. And when they had a date for his depart, they put everything on that day and made preparations. Poor thing that there was not any farmer or knowledgable person among them on weathers, that day was messed with a storm, inceassant rain and hence prolonged stay of prince. Jiesheshuai still wanted to attack the palace as according to him was too late to change the plan. 20 of people found this extremely unpleasant and fled in many directions (whom the Chinese authority later would found and exile many of them, if not all), but giving chase to them was not an option for them. The remaining people take a look at themselves and found that none of them actually knows each other, another fluke of fate maybe, but they did not bother to delve it anyway.

    They attacked the palace. Started to bring down guards one by one with arrows, swords, lances and the like. They could not pierce through as there was an army against, even though they held out much longer than expected. Some enter the stable and brought 20 bare horses, with that they fled to the north without thinking much of what will happen later. They kept dropping the numbers of followers but to no avail. There was the Wei River and constant rain, as if to bury them alive. But that did not happen, they valiantly fight to the point that no one knew which one was Jiesheshuai, but there are times numbers matter, and that was not an exception. A hopeless rebellion of Jiesheshuai and his comrades was torn to the pieces at that place.



    Relationships
    Relationships:
    Emperor Tang Taizong: "You, who find my manners despicable, those "manners" carried this empire through the vast steppes"
    Ashina Shibobi: "I did not accuse you of treason "falsely", anyway whatever.
    Qin Shi Huang: "I would rather like to compete and surpass you instead of my disgusting contemporaries"
    Li Guang (a.k.a. flying general): "People here, still keep losing their way"
    Bumin Khagan: "If you guys were not be too obsessed by some afraid archnemesis, we would farm the Sichuan and fish in Yangtze peacefully with our tribes."
    Attila: "I heard that he was also a renegade for a few years in a distant step, then his uncle pull him and later he became a ruler of a very strong empire, while my uncle was going back and forth with indecisive Shibobi and his already strong emire crumbled, what would I do other than what I did?"

    Last edited by arrowofsky; March 28th, 2020 at 04:04 PM.

  19. #379
    love warrior <3 world-0 the god of world-0's Avatar
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    dude, i know people joke about it, but you should not just literally just copy and past the wiki article on your lore section. It is full of junk like random numbers and broken links, so maybe clean it a little. A bit more development for his personality whould also be good, those two entire sections just for four lines of text seem like a waste of potential.


    here is a list of my servant sheets(new and improved format for my servant sheets)

  20. #380
    屍食鬼 Ghoul arrowofsky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by the god of world-0 View Post
    dude, i know people joke about it, but you should not just literally just copy and past the wiki article on your lore section. It is full of junk like random numbers and broken links, so maybe clean it a little. A bit more development for his personality whould also be good, those two entire sections just for four lines of text seem like a waste of potential.
    I added the remaining story part and relationships, and put a little tweak in Noble Phantasm 2. Thx for the critic.

    Renewed post: https://forums.nrvnqsr.com/showthrea...=1#post3051026

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