I've always seen Morgana sheets as her older and evil witch version. Seeing this lily variant is really refreshing.
Nice job Gally.
I've always seen Morgana sheets as her older and evil witch version. Seeing this lily variant is really refreshing.
Nice job Gally.
Quest of Fate
Apocrypha Universe Fate Quest Project
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Beast's Lair Discord Server For Fate Quests
Hermes Servant Collection Master Post
When I say sphere, think of the movie of the same name. It's about that big and similar in appearance. Inside, it's basically her own personal Avalon. Or better yet, the inside is like the virtual world in Shelter.
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"Human Imagination" is the key phrase here, I believe.
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I plan to do Lily-III and her final, adult version at some point. Probably soon.
Last edited by Historia; November 7th, 2016 at 05:02 PM.
Quest of Fate
Apocrypha Universe Fate Quest Project
---
Beast's Lair Discord Server For Fate Quests
Hermes Servant Collection Master Post
Oh, and, forgot to mention:
It's a progression. I'm basing the rank on who she is, rather than the overall powerlevel(?) of the Noble Phantasm. As she is now, she's in the 'rebellious teenager' phase. It's useless outside of serving as a truly secluded place where she can mope.
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I'll add that in sometime in the future, too lazy at the moment.
Ail Don: I really like that Lawrence Of Arabia sheet. Easily the best you've written so far, I'd reckon. I like how his NPs essentially all work in congruence with one another and particularly how you managed to work in a quote of his into Wilderness Of Zin. Nice job!
So Royd, I'd hate to sound a bit repetetive, bu what doy you think of my St Nicholas sheet? I'm especially interested by your feedback since you've already done a Santa sheet.
Last edited by Alexcoene; November 7th, 2016 at 06:09 PM.
It's okay. Believe me, I'm the last person with any right to criticize repeated asking for feedback...
St. Nick's pretty good. You more went with Nicholas as a (semi-)historical figure, whereas mine was the idea of 'Santa Claus' in popular culture. I agree with Ail that Discernment Of The Poor might fit a bit better then Pure Eyes for what you have in mind, though I suppose it depends whether you want a literal magic 'morality sensor' or just a general ability to discern good and evil motives attained through experience.
I feel really disappointed that there hasn't been a Yakov Pavlov sheet before. He needs some love.
FACECLAIM
True Name: Vasily Pavlov
Alignment: Lawful Good
Class: Caster[Suprise!]
Parameters:
Strength: D
Agility: D
Endurance: A
Mana: D
Luck: A
NP: A+
Class Skills:
Item Creation: D
Only capable of creating infantry weapons of war of the soviet union.
Territory Creation: A
In life, he was known for creating a fortress out of an ordinary apartment building.
Skills:
Battle Continuation: A
He was known for continuing to fight against an army for days, dooming the German Army to defeat.
Battle Tactics: A+
He was able to use a small group of men to hold off the entire German Army, with extremely limited supplies and equipment.
Eye of the Mind[False]: A
He was able to intuit the correct method to hold off each wave of German attacks.
Bravery: C
He and his men fought for days, never even considering surrender.
NP: Pavlov’s House: A++
He turns a building into a fortress , summoning forth heroic spirits with E-ranked stats , the wraiths of his fellow soldiers who held the House with him. Any allies within the house gain the skills required to assist in the defence. It is able to resist almost any assault, as the equipment made by Pavlov becomes low-ranked Noble Phantasms within the walls of the fortress. These Phantasms range from E-B in rank. However, the most potent ability of this noble phantasm is it's ability to reduce the rank of Anti-Army Noble Phantasms used against it by two ranks, as it's legend has a strong Anti-Army connotation.
Info
Also, my first sheet, so don't kill me too much.
Never heard of this guy before. While sparse, the sheet isn't bad for a first try though some parts definitely need serious nerfing. Territory Creation (A) for being able to make a 'Fortress' is fair enough, but Battle Continuation and Army Tactics (I presume you meant Military?) definitely need to be lowered by one or two rankings at least.
In fact, going by the (admittedly brief) lore given I'm not really sure he should have Battle Continuation at all. That Skill is for heroes that kept up combat through severe injuries, not just in fighting for long periods of time as your description seems to imply. If you really want a Skill for that, I'd recommend making an original one rather then shoehorning an existing Skill that doesn't quite fit. (You could call it 'Unrelenting Spirit' or what have you)
Endurance- A for such a modern hero is also way overblown, though the rest of his stats are fairly reasonable. Still very high for a Caster but since he was a soldier in life and there already is a precedent for 'close-combat Casters' like Geronimo I'd say fair enough. I'd still maybe lower Luck by one rank as well, since while defending an apartment building from an entire army is a pretty impressive feat I wouldn't say it warrants an ability to 'defy fate' higher then Heracles or Arturia.
His NP isn't bad, a little generic with the wraith-summoning but the other aspects make it more interesting. The rank is obscene, though. There's simply no way an apartment building defended by some guy should be at the same level as a holy sword of the planet forged from all mankind's hopes and dreams. Lower it to B or C (with possible + modifiers) and we're set.
Apologies if this is a harsh welcome but without feedback there's no way anybody can get better. In any case, welcome to the forum WhatShouldNotBe!
Last edited by RoydGolden; November 8th, 2016 at 12:22 AM.
This Servant reminded me of Scamandros from the last thread, so I imagined their masters agreeing to an alliance, giving her the opportunity to toy with Scamandros's mind and push him further towards his dark side.
Has anyone else thought of how certain CAS servants would interact with each other? There's probably another thread for this and I don't know because I don't come here often.
As for the sheet itself, love that Noble Phantasm. The clinical language masks something really horrid, and your characterization of Caster as being quietly disturbed is fascinating in the worst way, especially given her history.
ArcherClass: Archer
Saviour and King of the Trojan Diaspora
Place of Origin: Italy
Alignment: Chaotic Good
Attribute: Earth
Faceclaim
Parameters:
Strength: C
Endurance: B
Agility: B
Magic: D
Luck: A-
Noble Phantasm: B
Class Skills:
- Magic Resistance C
Cancel spells with a chant below two verses- Independent Action A
It is possible for a Servant to stay in the world without a Master indefinitely if they take care to conserve their Mana.
Personal Skills:
- Riding C
One can flawlessly ride animals and vehicles that received a proper training and adjustment.- Affections of the Goddess D
The blessing of the goddess Diana, who showed Archer the way to his destined land. Agility and Luck are Ranked-Up.- Charisma B
The natural talent to command an army and a country. Archer’s rank B is fitting for a king.- Journey of Flowers B
A blessing towards the youth who became the saviour of the scattered Trojan people and the founder of a great nation. His traveling is filled with hope, making the hearts of those who fight along him more proactive.
Equipment:
- One-handed sword of Greek design
- A horse that doesn’t qualify as a Noble Phantasm
Noble Phantasm:
Spoiler:
Lore:
Spoiler:
Personality:
Spoiler:
Miscellaneous:
Spoiler:
The lore for this Servant was taken from the Historia Regum Britanniae. I know it is far from historical, but given the existence of a historical Uther and Arthur Pendragon in the Fate series, I thought I’d simplify things and stick to one unified account of the kings of the Welsh and Bretons.
Last edited by Constructman; November 8th, 2016 at 06:02 PM.
Brutus: Given that pretty much his whole legend consisted of wandering from place to place, couldn't a higher rank in Independent Action be appropriate?
Also, his NP is kind of generic. Other then the curse aspect, there isn't really anything that ties in to Brutus' legend particularly or sets it apart from other magical bows. I'd recommend either coming up with a more interesting effect or giving him a secondary NP for extra flavor. (Something to do with his founding of Britain?)
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Also, in his Journey Of Flowers Skill (which I liked quite a bit BTW), the description for some reason refers to 'she' instead of he. An artifact of a later disgarded genderbend?
Last edited by RoydGolden; November 8th, 2016 at 01:29 AM.
@Brutus: I actually did a Brutus of Troy sheet not too long ago! It's pretty interesting to compare our two interpretation, particularly in regard of what skills whe gave him. I agree with Royd that he could use another NP. Maybe something based on the Brutus stone like mine?
A quick meme while I work on something more serious. Pls no ban.
Class: Assassin
True Name: Charles Manson
Alias: Most Dangerous Man Alive
Alignment: Chaotic Evil
Origin: Current Event
Region: America
Parameters
Strength: D
Endurance: D
Agility: D
Mana: E
Luck: C
NP: C
Class Skills:
Espionage: (A+)
At this rank, as long as the user is not outed by his allies, it is incredibly difficult to discern any hostility from the user. However, the instant when Assassin attacks directly, this Skill loses its effects.
Personal Skills:
Charisma: (C++)
It was amazing how the patterns of his later life were evident right away. Six years old first grade he's talking the girls in his class into beating up boys he doesn't like. Then when the principal comes to ask Charlie, 'Why did you do that?' Charlie's response is, 'It wasn't me; they were doing what they wanted. You can't blame me for that.' The exact same defense he uses all those years later in the Tate-LaBianca trial.
Assassin's Charisma is of the listed rank when used on fellow Servants, but A+ when speaking to a magus or other human.
Protection of the Music God (False): (B)
A skill crystallizing Assassin's obsession with becoming famous by way of music. Charles Manson's ability to ingrain himself in any group whether they like it or not eventually lead him to Dennis Wilson of the Beach Boys, who would introduce him to the rest of the band. Charlie thought he had finally hit the big time, but there was just one problem. He was terrible at music. Always was and always will be. Therefore, Assassin's ability to differentiate sounds is of the represented rank, while the secondary effect of being able to recreate them is completely nulled.
Calculating Facade: (A)
"You know, a long time ago being crazy meant something. Now everybody's crazy."
In addition to being a master manipulator of people, Assassin is also a master manipulator of himself. Fooling people into believing he was generally insane for fun or as part of a court plea, this skill is composed of Transformation (D) and the effect of Uncrowned Arms Mastery (C).
Noble Phantasm
Lore
Last edited by Ail Don; November 8th, 2016 at 05:43 AM.
@Charles Manson: I somehow giggled at this sheet. Well yeah, he's an Assassin, but why does he have no Presence Concealment, even at a low rank? Even if their legends don't really much suit their class, Heroic Spirits have the class's Skills, even at low ranks like E or D. I'm just a beginner when it comes to Servants, and I also don't know all the Skills, but from what I understand from research, this is the case. That is, unless I misunderstood things yet again. Well I guess his case is a bit unique or something like that stuff?
And sometimes after you post, I post. What is going on...?
no