Create-A-Servant 2

[Hakuro]

Well, the last Servant I posted was back in August (or July?), and after it I started this one, but didn't finished it because writer's block, being busy and other stuff. Also since I didn't practiced my writting for some time I believe some parts may sound weird lol. No faceclaim because I imagine him as a Gilgamesh copy in my head;

Data and Parameters

Identity: Bacchus (Gre: Βάκχος)
Title: “God of Insanity”
Alternative Classes: Rider, Caster, Assassin
Gender: Male
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Background: Born from the relationship between Zeus and Persephone, Zagreus was a god of life and fertility. A god adored by many, but who was brutally killed and eaten by giants, remaining only his heart. Zeus took his heart and infused it in the body of Semele, a mortal lover of his, and from her was born a new demigod, Dionysus, also known as Bacchus. Even being a demigod, Bacchus was treated as a god, being called the god of wine and madness. He was also a warrior, whose adventures in Asia brought many conquests to Greece. Bacchus was a god of many mysteries, and his cults had more in common with Middle Eastern cults than with classical Greek cults, his followers were always in a state of constant insanity.
Strength – A
Endurance – A
Agility – C
Mana – B
Luck – A
Noble Phantasm – EX
Weaponry – Berserker prefers to fight unarmed, but sometimes is armed with a sword or a spear.
Armor – Berserker sometimes wear a light armor.

Skills

Class Skills:
Mad Enhancement (E~EX) - Raises basic parameters in exchange of hindering mental capacities. Berserker can increase or reduce the rank of this skill with his Noble Phantasm Bakkheia.

Personal Skills:

Divinity (A+) – The measure of whether one has Divine Spirit aptitude or not. Berserker is a demigod, son of Zeus and a mortal. Berserker also possess a Divine Core that raises his original rank.
Charisma (A+) – The natural talent to command an army. Increases the ability of allies during group battles. Berserker achieved this rank by both leadership of armies and being followed by many cultists.
Mind Anchoring (A) – The ability of staying sane through divine protection. Berserker’s state of mind is protected, making him immune to most mental interference and illusions. This also makes Berserker able to be sane when under effect of Mad Enhancement. This protection only affects the conscience of Berserker, its body and senses can be still affected.

NP

Ampelos
Sacred Plant, My Spear and Shield

C / Anti-Army, Barrier

Legends tell that once the god Bacchus fell in love with the young man Ampelos. However the lover fell from the back of a bull while riding it, dying immediately. Being the only person that Bacchus really loved, he transformed his mortal body in the first vine, growing grapes, and making it possible to create wine. Forever Ampelos is at Bacchus side.

Ampelos act as infinite vines that can grow in any terrain for the aid of Berserker. They can quickly grow in urban areas, in the desert, even inside saltwater, if Berserker needs it help of command it. The vines can be used as barriers or as a weapon, being able to pierce the skin of enemies, and also constricting them. Although they can be easily cut or destroyed, they grow again faster than it was destroyed.

Berserker always carries four vines with himself, two in his forearms, and two in his legs. These can be used to help Berserker during close-ranged combats against other Servants. After conquering a new territory, Berserker shall infest it with vines that will attack any intruder merciless.

Bakkheia
Madness

A / Anti-Party

In many legends and myths, Bacchus/Dionysus made people enter in a state of insanity and madness. They could be their followers, making them suffer from a frenzy pleasure in his sacred parties, or he could do it for his enemies, sometimes making them kill their family and friends during this mental state. The ability was known as Bakkheia by the Greeks.

Bakkheia can be described as the ability of turning water in wine. A power that would be later in history assigned to Jesus Christ, creating comparisons between both Messianic Figures. When used in a person, this Noble Phantasm will induce the effects of intoxication by alcohol, and in severe levels, would make the target a victim of Mad Enhancement. Berserker uses this to control his Rank of Mad Enhancement, being always under effect of Bakkheia.

When used in common humans, the effects of Bakkheia can be lethal, but almost impossible to kill a Servant just with it. Servants under the effects of this Noble Phantasm will have the effects of Mad Enhancement (whose Rank depends of the will of Berserker), and will also have the drawbacks of it, as not being able to talk properly, and not being able to use the effects of some Skills or activate some of their Noble Phantasm.

Zagreus
Heart of God

EX / Divine

The legends tell that, after being killed by giants and titans, the only remains of the young god Zagreus was his heart. Zeus used this heart in the mortal Semele, and his new son would be Dionysus. Dionysus was, in practice, a demi-god, being son of a mortal with a god, but Zagreus’ heart made him a god.

Zagreus is the Divine Core of Berserker, and his true identity and persona. It grants him most of his powers, skills and the control over his Noble Phantasms, being a passive Noble Phantasm. However, its true power is only used in case of Berserker dying or losing his new physical body. Under the circumstances of Berserker losing the war, his Master can still recover Zagreus, as a physical core, hidden, buried in the local of his death.

After the Master recovery of Zagreus, it need to be inserted into a new host, a mortal who will become Berserker new body. The new body takes some days to adapt, taking between three days and a week to full recover his strength as a Servant. The process completely transform the body of the host, making it identical to a Servant body, so Berserker still needs a mana supply to maintain it. Although the new body does not affect the uses of other Noble Phantasm and Skills, it does affect the parameters of Berserker. After being used, Zagreus needs five to nine days to be activated again, if Berserker dies in that period, he may not be able to generate the core and reviving again.

Note

His third skill, Mind Anchoring, would be a NP before, but I choose to make it a Skill instead. I am not sure if I could explain it, I may even remove it because of that. Trying to explain it better here, if Berserker is under his Mad Enhancement, he will not have total control of his body, neither understand or be understood by others. But he is still conscious under the effects of the madness, and can retain memory from the events he was insane, and also to be able to reduce his Mad Enhancement Rank with the use of his Noble Phantasm.

Well, I am not much proud of this Sheet (I've made better ones, even if they were mediocre), but since I started this one months ago, I'd rather finish it than let it die on my documents folder.

[Constructman]

... I have no idea what happened to the formatting. Apparently Beast's Lair hates Google Docs.

Next thing you'll tell is that Nursery Rhyme is a literal book.

I suppose what I'm really wondering where the line is drawn. Obviously, comics would be considered modern, right? What about cave paintings and hieroglyphs?

Got lazy with this. Definitely isn’t my best. Also, got lazy with the Proto-Indo-European words; expect only the most rudimentary grammar for her first Noble Phantasm.

Archer

Forgotten Hunter

Class: Archer
Place of Origin: France
Alignment: True Neutral
Attribute: Earth

faceclaim

Parameters:
Strength: D
Endurance: A
Agility: C
Magic: E
Luck: E
Noble Phantasm: C


Class Skills:

• Independent Action C

• Magic Resistance E

Personal Skills:

• Animal Dialogue E-

• Presence Detection E
• Eye of the Mind (True) C
• Medical Techniques C

Equipment:

• Bow with stone-tipped arrows

• Stone mace
• Stone-tipped javelins
• Stone knife
• Animal fat
• Flint

Noble Phantasm:
Ego Kerwos Woita: Going hunting
Anti-Army, E
With the sound of a horn, all wildlife in the area is driven into a stampeding frenzy. Every land-walking and sky-flying creature that is not a human will be driven to run wildly. Archer can direct the stampede by shooting “flares” into the sky with her bow, guiding the animals to rush in a certain direction. For a simple hunter, this would be a bonanza beyond compare, but for Archer, it also serves to trample opponents or otherwise distract them, allowing for some safe sniping.


Grotte de Lascaux: Images of a time gone by
Anti-Army, C
Due to her connections to the Lascaux Caves, Archer (with sufficient support from her Master) can bring the other images of the cave to life. So long as she is given an image of any of the cave paintings, Archer can pour mana into them, transforming the print into a living, self-sufficient creature. Deer, horses, aurochs, even other humans; these can all be brought into the world through mana combined with Archer’s imagination. [/Spoiler]


Lore:
Who is this woman? For what purpose was her rudimentary image recorded on the walls of the Lascaux Caves over 17 000 years ago?


Did she ever truly walk the Earth? Was she a participant in the deer hunt that was recorded to history? Was she merely the artist, depicting an event that might have been embellished or even created from whole cloth? Or did she never exist at all, being merely a scribble on a wall?


In any case, her image was preserved in a tucked away cave in Southwestern France until it was discovered by a group of teenagers in 1940. With the caves opened to the public eight years later, many people were allowed to gaze at the image of the hunt, wondering to themselves what it could have been.


If Archer had lived at all, then her life would have been an unremarkable one. Born to a tribe in Western Europe, she would have been trained to become a gatherer, maybe a mother, but most definitely a mother. Upon becoming an adult, she would gather, patrol, and gather for her village (if his people were settled) or her roving camp (if his people were nomadic). Eventually, she would bear children to continue the cycle, then die to sickness, accident, or in battle, with her name being forgotten after the cycles of the moon became innumerable.


Personality:
Archer is a very simple woman, driven by a simple goal: survive. She has no real motivations aside from this, and although the Holy Grail would have given her knowledge of the conveniences and complications of the modern world, she would care not for them unless they directly benefited her survival. Once she stops worrying about where to get food and shelter, Archer… will still be a simple woman, not one for philosophizing or moralizing. To her, who has been summoned into the present without the rest of her people, her Master is her “people” whom she would never betray.


Her reaction to the other Servants would be utter shock, followed by either devoted worship or utter repulsion. Once she realizes how high the stakes are and the power of her opponents, she will be more than tempted to cut her losses and run, though still not abandoning her Master.


Her wish for the Holy Grail would be to remember her true identity.


Miscellaneous:
Likes: food, fire, shelter
Dislikes: people who destroy for no good reason, people who hoard resources
Talents: archery, butchering, first aid
Natural Enemy: any ancient, medieval, renaissance, or classical king

[Alexcoene]

@Amelia Earhart: I ... I don't like it. I mean, I can see what the idea behind it is, but I don't think that just "people have been saying crazy rumors" is a big enough justification for "she can litteraly have all the skills and be in all the classes". I mean, I've seen other servants in this thread who have been deformed by rumors, but they're more defined, not just "lol I she can make up whatever she want". Heck, Jack the Ripper doesn't have a skill like that, and she actually has very differents descriptions of her and her abilities. I also don't see why these rumors have overriden her true self when she's not mainly known for them. She also doesn't have Riding despite being a Rider. You could had least mentionned that her rank in it is null due to her specialty. Tough I rather like her NP and the basis behind it, but I think she sould have something based on the fact that she was the first woman to cross the Atlantic Ocean, wich for me is a way more important of her legend than crazy rumors about her disappearance. and you wrote Constitution instead of endurance. All in all, I think it's a pretty poor sheet.

@Bacchus: Aww, it's not so bad. I've been toying with the tought of making a Dyonisus sheet myself, and your Bacchus has some pretty interesting Noble Phantasms. That said, I think Mind Anchoring is a bit confusing and pretty redondant. I also think it's a bit boring to make a Berserker's madness completely controlable.

@Nameless Hunter: Well, you said yourself that it was not your best sheet and while the concept itself is interesting, I'm afraid that I have to agree with you. Her skills are way too bare. I'd like seeing at least some description and justification regarding why she has them. Plus, your first NP is pretty much made-up and I think the second deserve a better effect than "summon beasts". And there's a problem with your spoiler. All in all, I can't said much since you yourself admitted that it was half-assed.

[Bird of Hermes]

The moment I look away 3 pop up. Nice to see ya back Hakuro and Construct!

[RoydGolden]

Have to say, I actually love that Amelia Earhart sheet. I admit her EX ranked Skill and NP is kind of a huge stretch lore-wise, but the overall flavor is just too great for me to care. You conveyed the vibe of a charming adventurous tomboy really well and she's somebody who I'd absolutely love to see in a Grail War just for her personality alone.

Given how Engagement To The Unknown works, it sounds like the best ally for her would be somebody known as an ultra-realist (Sherlock Holmes? Now that'd be a strange team-up...) to 'remind her of her true self' whenever the mental erosion starts to turn overwhelming.

I imagine it could make for a sort of heartwarming scene actually, with Amelia moping over how she's a 'monster' with no true memories or identity, while the 'realist' (whoever they may be) gives her a hug before calmly and soothingly telling her "You're Amelia Earhart. The dashing pilot who flew over the Atlantic and inspired people everywhere. You're not a monster."

....Or something to that effect.

- - - Updated - - -

I quite liked the Bacchus and Nameless Hunter sheets up above as well.

For the former, the idea of a Heroic Spirit based off a cave painting is something I've never seen before, so kudos for that! Being able to bring cave painting to life also makes for some cool imagery, though I assume that if she were to summon a human being through it they'd just be a nameless wraith/familiar rather then an actual independent person? I do think you should definitely add descriptions to her Skills though. Would add a lot more flavor, since as is things do come off as a tad sparse.

Regarding Bacchus, not as much personality involved as the others I commented on but his NPs are quite creative and well thought-out. Not entirely sure what the point is of his Mind Anchoring Skill or how it fits with Bacchus' own legend (I guess, since he's a god of intoxication he's immune to the most direct effects himself?).

Also, I don't quite get how Bakkheia works. Does he literally transmute water in the target's body into wine (which really does sound like it should be lethal) or just place some kind of mental interference magic on them as if they were intoxicated by wine?

[Alexcoene]

Have to say, I actually love that Amelia Earhart sheet. I admit her EX ranked Skill and NP is kind of a huge stretch lore-wise, but the overall flavor is just too great for me to care. You conveyed the vibe of a charming adventurous tomboy really well and she's somebody who I'd absolutely love to see in a Grail War just for her personality alone.

Given how Engagement To The Unknown works, it sounds like the best ally for her would be somebody known as an ultra-realist (Sherlock Holmes? Now that'd be a strange team-up...) to 'remind her of her true self' whenever the mental erosion starts to turn overwhelming.

I imagine it could make for a sort of heartwarming scene actually, with Amelia moping over how she's a 'monster' with no true memories or identity, while the 'realist' (whoever they may be) gives her a hug before calmly and soothingly telling her "You're Amelia Earhart. The dashing pilot who flew over the Atlantic and inspired people everywhere. You're not a monster."

....Or something to that effect.

...Nope, still not buying it. I mean, I think the woman known for crossing the Atlantic Ocean should deserve more than "make up anything". And I don't think she should be distorted this much, given she has a pretty clearly defined identity and life. And where does these rumors come from, anyway? While I've seen some pretty strange rumors her, I've never seen any that would allow her to have all these classes. And like I said, even Jack the ripper, didn't have a skill like that despite the fact that their existance is pretty much nothing BUT rumors. Frankly, while as a servant this sheet is interesting, as an Amelia Earhart sheet, I think it is very insulting to have all her accomplishments be overridden by some rumors.

[Hakuro]

Well, about Bakkheia, it works by transmuting a percentage of the target's blood into alcohol. He cannot turn 100% of the target's water into it (unless, IDK, if the target is prisoned and under the effects of Bakkheia for a very long period of time). Instantly, he can only use it to let the target Mad or Insane.

[Alexcoene]

Well, about Bakkheia, it works by transmuting a percentage of the target's blood into alcohol. He cannot turn 100% of the target's water into it (unless, IDK, if the target is prisoned and under the effects of Bakkheia for a very long period of time). Instantly, he can only use it to let the target Mad or Insane.

No, I meant that the fact that he could control his Mad Enhancement at will is pretty boring since it kinda goes against the point of the Berserker point for me. Well, it's just my personnal opinion, and it's pretty justified considering his legend.

[RoydGolden]

...Nope, still not buying it. I mean, I think the woman known for crossing the Atlantic Ocean should deserve more than "make up anything". And I don't think she should be distorted this much, given she has a pretty clearly defined identity and life. And where does these rumors come from, anyway? While I've seen some pretty strange rumors her, I've never seen any that would allow her to have all these classes. And like I said, even Jack the ripper, didn't have a skill like that despite the fact that their existance is pretty much nothing BUT rumors. Frankly, while as a servant this sheet is interesting, as an Amelia Earhart sheet, I think it is very insulting to have all her accomplishments be overridden by some rumors.

Don't get me wrong, I totally see what you mean. I just liked the overall 'flavor' of her sheet enough to overlook the nitty-gritty details.

- - - Updated - - -

No, I meant that the fact that he could control his Mad Enhancement at will is pretty boring since it kinda goes against the point of the Berserker point for me. Well, it's just my personnal opinion, and it's pretty justified considering his legend.

I'm pretty sure Hakuro is responding to me here.

[Hakuro]

No, I meant that the fact that he could control his Mad Enhancement at will is pretty boring since it kinda goes against the point of the Berserker point for me. Well, it's just my personnal opinion, and it's pretty justified considering his legend.

Well he is pretty gimmicky for a Berserker. I wanted to make one that could take total advantage over their Mad Enhancement. Also I wanted to make him a very strong Servant, like the last boss of the war, not sure If I could make him that with that sheet.

[Ail Don]

Appearance

Class: Berserker
True Name: Tom o'Bedlam
Alias: Mad Tom
Alignment: True Mad
Origin: "Tom o'Bedlam", an anonymous poem
Region: Britain (specifically Bethlem Royal Hospital)


Strength- B+
Endurance- A+
Agility- C
Mana- C+
Luck- C+
NP- B


Gender: Male
Likes: The moon, the creatures of the night, generous people
Dislikes: Whores, thieves, gangsters
Talent:
Natural Enemy: Himself
Armament: Nothing

Class skills:


Mad Enhancement: (EX)
As a conceptual being of madness itself, Berserker displays the highest possible rank of Mad Enhancement. All parameters are raised by one, with Strength and Endurance ranked up by two. Like Spartacus, Berserker is free to use his Noble Phantasm and personal skills with no reduction in accuracy, but he'll babble incoherently nigh-constantly (akin to King Lear). May be difficult to communicate with if the Master isn't speaking in Shakespearean prose. "Of thirty years have I twice twenty been enraged."

Personal skills:


Honor of the Deranged: (A+)
"While I doe sing any food, any feeding,
feedinge---drink or clothing:
Come dame or maid, be not afraid,
poore Tom will injure nothing."
The skill of the gentleman madman. It prevents Berserker from attacking women and children if they're pure enough. Artoria would be an example of one protected by this skill, while Altera would not. At this rank, those in Berserker's general vicinity are at risk of being ascribed a Mental Pollution effect of B- rank.

Golden Rule: (E)
Coming from the dubious myth that harmless tenants of Bethlehem Royal Hospital were turned out onto the street during the day to beg for their medical fees. During the day Berserker's pockets gradually fill with money, however it only comes in the form of loose change--sovereigns being the maximum value of any given coin. Getting him to sit still long enough to secure the money is another matter.

Transformation: (A-)
Due to Tom O'Bedlam being a synonym for insane person and thus not possessing a true form, Berserker can take a variety of shapes and guises so long as it's of a male (the female equivalent would be a Mad Maudlin). Normally sealed or at least difficult to keep Berserker from shifting forms in uncomfortable locations.

Noble Phantasm:

Furious Fancies
Knight of Ghosts and Shadows

Type: Anti-Unit
Rank: B
Range: 1
Max. Target: 1

A Noble Phantasm derived from the first two stanzas of the poem, and the penultimate. Those that attack Tom O'Bedlam do what the panther--in this case meant to represent the King of Beasts--does not. Attacking madness is by definition madness itself. Thus upon activation, Berserker's movements become an exact mirror of the target's. If the target throws a punch, Berserker will throw the same punch so that both fists collide. Berserker gives up his consciousness by accessing the latent madness inside the target, becoming in essence a hostile puppet controlled by the victim. Should the target be unbalanced enough either by Honor of the Deranged or their own madness, they will hallucinate Berserker wielding the same weapon and Noble Phantasm should they activate it (of course Berserker has no access to such things that aren't his, therefore the only pain felt by a hallucinated Excaliblast or spear thrust for example would be entirely mental). While the hallucination affect is possible to overcome with a sufficient Bravery skill or something similar, the puppetry aspect is not.

Lore

"Tom o' Bedlam" is the name of an anonymous poem in the "mad song" genre, written in the voice of a homeless "Bedlamite." The poem was probably composed at the beginning of the 17th century; in How to Read and Why, Harold Bloom calls it "the greatest anonymous lyric in the [English] language."

The term "Tom o' Bedlam" was used in Early Modern Britain and later to describe beggars and vagrants who had or feigned mental illness (see also Abraham-men). They claimed, or were assumed, to have been former inmates at the Bethlem Royal Hospital (Bedlam). It was commonly thought that inmates were released with authority to make their way by begging, though this is probably untrue. If it happened at all the numbers were certainly small, though there were probably large numbers of mentally ill travellers who turned to begging, but had never been near Bedlam. It was adopted as a technique of begging, or a character. For example, Edgar in King Lear disguises himself as mad "Tom o' Bedlam".

[DessertTaiga]

(I decided to not make another post since this isn't much of a revamp, rather just change some things and add some new things.)

Images

Spirit: Hansel and Gretel
Class: Assassin


PARAMETERS
Strength: E
Endurance: D
Agility: C
Mana: D
Luck: A
N. Phantasm: D


CLASS SKILLS
SKILL NAME: Presence Concealment (B)
DESCRIPTION: The capacity to hide one's presence as a Servant. In their case, rather than being undetected when planning an ambush or surprise attack, they can hide the fact that they’re Servants. In the eyes of people, they are normal children, that is, until they attack.


PERSONAL SKILLS
SKILL NAME: Combination (B)
DESCRIPTION: The quality of being two Heroic Spirits summoned into a single Class Container. Since they are siblings and are the two protagonists in one tale, Hansel and Gretel are two separate people, but they are considered as one Assassin. Meaning, if one of them is killed, the other will also get killed.


SKILL NAME: Mental Pollution (C)
DESCRIPTION: A twisted mentality that offers protection from mental interference type Thaumaturgy. However as a consequence, it becomes difficult to come to an understanding with others not similarly twisted. These two aren’t said to be insane in their story, however, there is a possible interpretation that these two have come into an obsession in hunting witches, and will willingly kill if they see one. In addition to that, their mentality can be summarized as, "the more witches, the more murder; the more murder, the more fun." In other words, they see killing mages and witches as a fun activity.


SKILL NAME: Witch Hunter (C)
DESCRIPTION: An ability to have performance increase when against mages and servants of Caster class or even has skills from that class. Because of their possible outcome of hunting witches and wizards in the end of the story, they have more focus and are very obsessed in slaying them, leading to Assassin to have stronger chance against Casters. It doesn't change the Caster-Assassin affinity though, so the opponent can still have a chance if they are a servant, but this skill can definitely be against masters/mages.


NOBLE PHANTASM
NOBLE PHANTASM NAME: Witchkiller: Kill the Witches and Wizards! (D)
CLASSIFICATION: Anti-Thaumaturgy
DESCRIPTION: This Noble Phantasm represents how they defeated the villain in the story, the witch who lures children for her to cook and eat them. With this activated, their target will disappear, and then will reappear a second or two later, but instead he/she is trapped inside an oven. It isn’t just any oven though; the oven represents how the witch was killed: she was put inside an oven and was cooked. With the target inside the oven, Assassin will burn them by setting up the heat to maximum, so there is a possibility that the oven may explode, or if not, their enemy is just burned to death.


CHARACTER INFORMATION
Note: Hansel on left, Gretel on right.


Height/Weight: 146cm · 39kg / 142cm · 35kg
Source: Hansel and Gretel
Country of Origin: Germany
Alignment: True · Neutral
Gender: Male / Female


Likes: Killing witches and wizards
Dislikes: Witches and wizards, Being fooled
Natural Enemy: Their stepmother, Anyone they consider as a "witch".


LORE (Source: X, last paragraph by me)

Lore

Assassin’s identity is that of Hansel and Gretel, two twin protagonists of a fairy tale of German origin.


Hansel and Gretel are children whose father is a woodcutter. When a great famine settles over the land, the woodcutter’s abusive second wife decides to take the children into the woods. Her plan was to abandon the kids in the woods so that she and her husband will not starve to death. According to her it is mainly because the children eat too much. The woodcutter opposes the plan but finally and reluctantly submits to his wife’s scheme. However, while talking about their plan, they are unaware that Hansel and Gretel have overheard them from the children’s bedroom. After the parents have gone to bed, Hansel sneaks out of the house and gathers as many white pebbles as he can, then returns to his room, reassuring Gretel that God will not forsake them.


The next two days, the family walks deep into the woods and Hansel lays a trail of white pebbles. After their parents leave them, the children wait for the moon to rise before following the pebbles back home. They return home safely, much to their stepmother’s horror. Once again provisions become scarce and the stepmother angrily orders her husband to take the children farther into the woods and leave them there to starve. Hansel and Gretel attempt to leave the house to gather more pebbles, but find the doors locked and escape impossible.


The following morning, the family treks into the woods. Hansel takes a slice of bread and leaves a trail of bread crumbs to follow home. However, after they are once again abandoned, the children find that birds have eaten the crumbs and they are lost in the woods.


After days of wandering, they follow a beautiful white bird to a clearing in the woods, where they discover a large cottage built of gingerbread and cakes with window panes of clear sugar and a candy-cane door handle. Hungry and tired, the children begin to eat the rooftop of the candy house when the door opens. A hideous old hag emerges and lures them inside with the promise of soft beds and delicious food. Unaware that their hostess is a bloodthirsty witch who built the gingerbread house to lure children to her to cook and eat them, the children enter the house.


The following morning the witch locks Hansel in a cage, and forces Gretel into becoming a slave. The witch force-feeds Hansel regularly to fatten him up, but he cleverly offers a bone and the witch feels it, thinking it is his finger. Due to her blindness, she is fooled into thinking Hansel is still too thin to eat. After weeks of this, the witch grows impatient and decides to eat Hansel anyway.


The witch prepares the oven for Hansel, but decides to kill Gretel as well. She coaxes Gretel to open the oven and prods her to lean over in front of it to see whether the fire is hot enough. Sensing the witch’s intent, Gretel pretends that she does not understand what she is being told to do. Infuriated, the witch demonstrates and Gretel instantly shoves her into the oven and slams and bolts the door shut. Gretel frees Hansel from the cage and the pair discover a vase full of treasure and precious stones. Putting the jewels into their clothing, the children set off for home.


A swan ferries them across an expanse of water. When they reach the house, they discover that their stepmother has died and that their father has spent his days mourning his children’s deaths. When he sees them, he becomes happy again. The family becomes rich thanks to the witch’s treasure and they all live happily ever after.


"Oh... really? Happily ever after?" Not exactly. They now have a strong obsession in witch hunting after they got involved in the gingerbread house witch incident, leading to their low mental stability. They now see witch hunting as a fun activity; they also take their riches and materials for themselves and their father, claiming that they just found them in the forests and trying to hide their obsession from him... but isn't that a bit suspicious?

Notes

• In my opinion, I think the "bounty hunting" ending for them is one of the most common interpretations yet it's really interesting to me so I stayed with that. I added the "stole the riches and materials of the ones they hunted" because I feel like it can fit.
• Having a bit of block with the Lore, so will update soon if I can.
• Next up is Rizal to revamp. Wooo...

[Alexcoene]

@Tom O'Bodlen: I like it. He's pretty flavorful and his Noble Phantasm is quite original. He's a bit weak when you think about it, but that's fine since he's pretty obscure. After all, not all servants need to be top-tier.

@Hansel and Gretel: They're not so bad. The only things I'm not sure about is their Battle Continuation and their Noble Phantasm. You should justify why they have this skill and I don't think the NP is as interesting as it could be. Maybe instead of flaming dagger, they could trap their foes in the oven itself, and then burn them? Aside from that, it's a pretty good sheet, all thing considered.

[DessertTaiga]

@Hansel and Gretel: They're not so bad. The only things I'm not sure about is their Battle Continuation and their Noble Phantasm. You should justify why they have this skill and I don't think the NP is as interesting as it could be. Maybe instead of flaming dagger, they could trap their foes in the oven itself, and then burn them? Aside from that, it's a pretty good sheet, all thing considered.

Thanks for the feedback! I’ve replaced the Noble Phantasm description, you know, trapping the enemy inside the oven and stuff. In my opinion, it was simple but awesome and also somewhat funny. However, for the Battle Continuation, I removed it but I have no idea what Skill to replace it with. Any other suggestions?

[Bird of Hermes]

Thanks for the feedback! I’ve replaced the Noble Phantasm description, you know, trapping the enemy inside the oven and stuff. In my opinion, it was simple but awesome and also somewhat funny. However, for the Battle Continuation, I removed it but I have no idea what Skill to replace it with. Any other suggestions?

You could try an original skill? Perhaps something to do with their respective eating habits?

[Alexcoene]

Decided to write the protagonist of one of the more obscure part of arthurian lore.

Class: Lancer
True Name: Jaufre
Alignment: Lawful Good
Likes: Serving King Arthur, Helping People, His wife Brunissen, Sleeping
Dislikes: Evil People, Being Mocked
Natural Enemy: Taulat de Rougemont, Felon D'Auberue, Sir Kay
Personnality:
Lancer is a true knight: benevolent, loyal and brave. He never back down from helping a innocent or facing evil. He is merciful and will only kill a foe it their is no hope for them or it is absoltuely necessary. He sees Arthur's words as laws, and will likely refer to her for all decision if they are summoned as allies, tough he will be greatly surprised if he were to learn her real gender. That said, he still has two big default. The first is his intolerence for mockery: he hates being mocked and made a fool of and while he won't react violently, he will carry a grudge and play pranks on the offending party. That's why he doesn't care for Kay, who mocked him when he appeared before the king. The second is his tendency to sleep. He will frequently take deep naps at innoportune time and he has the unfortunate to react violently when awakened in less than gentle manners. He is also quite shy when it comes to showing affection toward those he loves. His "courting" of his wife pretty much consisted of the two averting their eyes from each other's gaze and blushing intensely until he miraculously mustered enough confidence to confess.

Stats-
Strength- B
Endurance- C
Agility- A
Mana- D
Luck- B
NP- A+

Spoiler:

Class Skills-

Magic Resistance- B
Cancel spells below three verses. Even if targeted by High-Taumathurgy, it is difficult for them to be affected. Lancer battled many magical beings such as demons and giants and recieved the blessing of a fairy.

Personal Skills-

Pursuit- A
The servants's aptitude are boosted when pursuing a retreating enemy. While in pursuit, Lancer gain a + modifier in Agility and Precense Detection at rank B in order to track the target. Lancer took an oath saying that he would not rest until he caught the fiendish knight Taulat de Rougemont.

Bravery- B
Ability that protect the servant against mental interference due their strength of will. Lancer never backed down from any fight, be it fighting giants or demon.

Protection of the Faeries- B
A blessing from the elementals that give the servant a rank-up in Luck in dangerous situation. The activation is limited to the battlefield, where it is possible to perform feats of arm. Lancer recieved a blessing fromthe Fairy of Gibel that protect him against beasts. As such, Lancer will gain a rank-up in Luck whenever he is facing a Beast-type enemy.

Golden Rule- C
Ability to quickly acquire great amounts of wealth. Lancer was given a chariot full of gold by the Fairy of Gibel.

Noble Phantasm-

La Lance Blanche ~ The King of Knight's Judgement

(Anti-Evil, A+) Taking the form of the lance he took from the Knight of the White Lance when he slayed him, this Noble Phantasm is in fact a manifestation of Lancer's merciful nature. Indeed, of all of his ennemies, he only killed the most wicked, preffering to send most of them to Camelot to be judged by King Arthur himself. By calling it's true name, Lancer will invoke the judgement of the King of Knights on the foe he struck with his lance. The effect will then depend on the foe's alignment. If they are Evil, then they will wounds as if struck by the light of Excalibur, the king's favored weapon. If they are Neutral, then they will be "imprisoned": they will be magically bound by invisible restraint until Lancer attack them with a normal attack. It won't do anything against Good neutral, because needlessly punishing innocents is not what a good king would do. Ennemy with a non-standard alignment like Mad will be counted as Evil, because rejecting the concept of Good and Evil is itself an sinful act.

Lore: Lancer is Jaufre, hero of a eponymous romance in Occitan. He is young man who one day came before King Arthur, asking to be knighted. However, during his audience, a wicked knight named Taulat arrives and stab one the knights before leaving. Jaufre then swore to catch the felon himself and is granten permision by Arthue, despite Kay's mocking. He then goes on his journey, slaying many foes, aquiring his lance and falling in love with Brunissen, the chatelaine of Castle Monbrun, before arriving at the land the criminal was ruling as a tyrant. There, he freed the true lord and defeated Taulat, tough he decided not to slay him and send him to Arthur to be judged.
Some time after, he was pulled trough trickery into the realm of the Fairy of Gibel so he could defend her castle against Felon D'Auberue. He accept and suceed. Afterward, during his wedding, the fairy grant him prootection against beasts and grant his wife the ability to please anyone that sees her, no matter what she does. Tough Jauffre was never made a part of the Round Table, he continued to serve King Arthur until her tragic end.

[Ramseph Boltstar]

OK, here is my latest sheet for a long time.

I'm planning to start a series of sheets about these kinds of Servants one of these days.

SERVANT SABER

Faceclaim

Alternate Classes: Lancer, Rider, Caster

Alignment: Varies but leans more toward the Lawful end of the spectrum

STR: B
END: B
AGI: C
MAG: C
LUCK: D
NP: A

Catalyst: A coin that has the seal of his order

Likes: Jerusalem, Fighting battles, God's Grace

Dislikes: Muslims, Sieges, Meddlesome Kings

Talents: Defending the Holy Land, managing the economy

Natural Enemy: Saladin, The Hassans, Philip le Bel

Class Skills:

Magic Resistance (B): Grants protection from magical effects.

Riding (B+): Most vehicles can be handled with above average skill. However, cannot ride the likes of Phantasm Races such as Monstrous Beasts.

As a Caster

Item Construction (C): is a Caster-class skill that manufactures magical items.

Personal Skills:

Military Tactics (B): The tactical knowledge used not for one-on-one combat situations, but for battles where many are mobilized. Bonus modifiers are provided during use of one's own Anti-Army Noble Phantasm or when dealing against an enemy Anti-Army Noble Phantasm. Entrusted the City of Jerusalem and the Holy Land to be defended against the Saracens, Saber as well as his fellow Orders would go down into history as one of the greatest heroes of the Crusades and would continue fighting in the name of the Holy Church until 1291.

Golden Rule (A-): Measures one's fortune to acquire wealth. Aside from waging war against the Crescent, Saber has also gone down into history as one of the first bankers of Europe.

Innocent Monster (C): An attribute possessed by Servants whose history and existence have been distorted by the monstrous reputations they accrued across the course of their life and thereafter

Noble Phantasm

• The Defense of Acre (Fortress)(A-): After the fall of Jerusalem to Saladin, the Levantine city of Acre would serve both as the new capital of the now tenuously named Kingdom of Jerusalem as well as the Saber’s base of operations. During the inevitable fall of the Crusader States, Acre was among the last cities to fall to Muslim hands after a bloody siege in 1291. The Phantasm takes form of the Crusader Fortress at its prime, with its thick walls and defences further strengthened by Saber and an army of Masterless Servants who played a part in the last, desperate stand against the advancing Mamluk slave armies.
• Baphomet: The Sabbatic Goat (Anti-Unit)(B): According to legend, Saber worshipped a demonic deity that takes the form of a man with a goat’s head that is engraved with a pentagram in the middle of its horns who has the ability to grant women the power of the Magus and is thought to have been an interpretation of the prophet Muhammad. The resulting Phantasm would summon the demon itself, which can either attack the enemy Servant or supply Saber a boost in all of his stats. Due to the massive amount of mana required for the summon, it is best used if Saber is under the Caster class. Also when using the phantasm, Saber's luck goes down to E, making the use of the phantasm itself a risky move.
  NP Faceclaim

  
• Curse of de Molay (Suicide)(EX): Saber’s ultimate NP indicating both his eventual fate and legend. Similar to the La Pucelle Noble Phantasm, it take the form of flames that engulf Saber, representing the same flames that claimed the life of his last Grandmaster Jacques de Molay. When the flames had fully engulfed him, Saber’s material form would be destroyed and in the process, the enemy Servant and Master would be branded with the insignia of his Order. The effects of the branding could lead to a curse of varying degrees for both Master and Servant depending on the distance of 5 to 15 meters. The cursed Master would either slowly waste away to disease (5 meters), having his or her magic circuits permanently destroyed (10 meters), or unable to use his or her Command seals (15 meters). In the meantime, an afflicted Servant would suffer either a sudden and devastating depletion of mana (5 meters), a drop in his or her parameters to E (10 meters) or unable to use his or her Noble Phantasm, both passive and active (15 meters). Only Servants with a Luck stat of A and above could resist the effects of the Phantasm.

Lore

The Poor Fellow-Soldiers of Christ and of the Temple of Solomon, also known as the Knights Templar are one of the greatest military orders that came into existence during the Crusades, an era of faith that pitted the Christian armies of the West against the Islamic forces of the East. Founded under the French knight Hugh de Payens with the support of the influential Bernard of Clairvaux, the Order was tasked to protect the Christian pilgrims of Europe arriving to the Holy Land from both rapacious outlaws and hostile Muslim armies all the while living in a state of righteous poverty. Eventually, the Knights would become the Crusader’s best soldiers, participating in the battles of Montgisard, the Horns of Hattin and Arsuf.

After the fall of Acre at around 1291, the Templars fortunes declined. Although they have become one of the richest entities of Europe, this only served the greedy interest of the French king Philip IV, who ordered the arrest of the knights on charges of heresy and debauchery such as their alleged worship of the demon god Baphomet. With the execution of Jacques de Molay at the stake, he cursed both the King and the Pope, promising them that their deaths shall come soon. Sure enough, the Pope died of a sickness a few months later while Philip IV suffered a painful death while hunting, with his entire dynasty doomed to peter out within a few years.

After the purge, the remaining Templar branches are either assimilated by the Hospitaller Knights, or hid themselves within the fringes of society. Today, one such branch, the similarly-named Order of the Templars served as a religious unit independent of the Hoy Church, with the infamous Sancraid Phahn amongst their members.

Saber’s wish is to see the formal return of the Templars as a part of the Holy Church as well the removal of all stains of heresy and controversy that has haunted the Order and finally to re-establish the Kingdom of Jerusalem.

Please give feedback

[Alexcoene]

@Ramseph Boltstar: What does Knight's Curse do? You have given no description of it's effect, and you already made his curse a NP, so it's pretty redundant. And I don't know about the concept. I mean, the templars have enough famous members that I feel could easily have been his true identity instead of being personnification of the order itself. I think you should add Innocent Monster to him since he should have been fairly distorted to be able to summon Baphomet. Speaking of wich, you may want to give more details what Baphomet can and can't do. Also, I've seen a few of your servants before, and why do you insist of giving almost all of them a Army Summon NP? I think you should have made him a Caster from the start, since he doesn't have any sword NP, and it would have made his sheet more original in my opinion. Why is his Magic Resistance A-? I don't think he sould have a higher rank in it than Artoria and you've given no reason for the - modifier. I also don't think his riding should be that high. You also didn't give a reson for the - in his Golden Rule. It may sound like I'm critisizing a lot, but it's actually a pretty good sheet, all thing considered. I especially like his last NP and that you managed to make it distinct from La Pucelle.

[Historia]

Now that would be a fanfic I would seriously consider reading.

Sounds like too much work for little pay off unless you make Shirou her Master and have them bone.

Because she's been in the news so much lately,

Why?

[Nuclear]

Why?

People have found out that a corpse lying in an abandoned island is hers.