Create-a-Servant

[Clockehwork]

I agree. But the comparison was not just pulled out of the air, it's one that he has professed to shooting for in the past.

[Hakuro]

Well, this is the first Servant I created back in 2011 when I got into fate. I wanted a female servant to be my protagonist, and didn't wanted to genderbent anyone, so I choose to make a more imaginative interpretation of her. Before anything else I want to say sorry for anything that may sound strange in the sheet since english is not my native language. And I don't have a FC for her because I never looked for them before, but in the next sheets I may get some.

It is all inside the spoiler

Spoiler:

Identity: Beatrice Portinari
Alternative Classes: Saber, Lancer
Gender: Female
Alignment: Lawful Good
Background: Beatrice Portinari is the muse of Dante Alighieri. Even meeting her only twice in his lifetime, it was enough for her to be remarkable in Dante's work and very few is known about Beatrice's life outside the poet's texts. Her most memorable act is as a psychopomp in the last chapter of Divina Commedia, Paradiso, and guiding Dante while he travels over the layers of heaven. As a Servant, Archer is the idealization of Dante's love, being the embodiment of beatific love in the appearance of his muse. She is a guardian angel, a savior for the souls of the innocent, a goddess who represents the purity and immaculacy, a protector of the divine justice and peace.
Strength D Mana C
Endurance D Luck A
Agility A+ Noble Phant. A++
Weaponry: Archer is able to summon a rapier or a longbow, both made of a silver-like metal.
Armor: Archer wear no armor.


Class Skills:
Magic Resistance (B) – Skill that qualifies the Servant resistance over spells and magecraft, the rejection of mana and the ability to cancel the effects of thaumaturgy. Spells with chant below three verses does not affect Archer. Stronger spells still may have their effects reduced.
Independent Action (B) – Skill that qualifies the ability of the Servant in maintain their physical permanence without a mana source for a determinate time. Archer is able to maintain herself two days without an established contract with a Master.


Personal Skills:
Divinity (C) – Skill that qualifies the Servant aptitude as a Divine Spirit. Archer is comparable to an angel or a daemon.
Flying (A) – Skill that measures the Servant ability and dexterity to fly. Archer is able to fly up to twice faster than her speed in soil with a pair of white, angelical, wings that she is able to summon.
Perception (Motive) (C) – Skill that guarantee the Servant the ability to detect and perceive motives and reasons behind someone's acts through small characteristics in their speech or movement. Archer is able to detect if the motive of someone matches their acts through body language, but she is not able to tell if they are lying or not.


Noble Phantasm:

Vita Nuova
The Life of a Maiden

Anti-Unit / B


La Vita Nuova (The New Life) is one of Dante's books and one of the few sources about the life of Beatrice Portinari. On its pages is described one of the few occasions where Dante and his muse met. An innovation as a love poetry, La Vita Nuova idealizes the platonic love of the author towards Beatrice, a pure and absolute, divine, love.
As a Noble Phantasm, Vita Nuova manifests as the arrows of Archer. While holding the projectiles in her longbow, Archer is able to engulf them in white flames, and then, shoot them against their opponents. These flame-covered arrows are much faster and destructive than the arrows Archer normally use.


The flame-covered arrows will explode in contact with a target and the area of effect will be proportional to the time the arrow remained in Archer hands charging (after 10 turns of charge, the area of effect reaches the maximum value). The explosion will burn everything in the area of effect, and the generated light will obfuscate everyone who had eye contact with it for 5 turns. Archer can choose between shooting multiple arrows, fast but with less damage, or a single arrow, more effective but requiring time to charge.

Divina Commedia
The Chant of God

Anti-Army / A++


Divina Commedia (Divine Comedy) is the magnum opus of Dante Alighieri, one of the most known epic poems in the world. The book is divided into three parts, describing the travel of Dante through hell (Inferno), purgatory (Purgatory) and heaven (Paradiso). In the last section, Beatrice Portinari appears to Dante, guiding him over the layers of heaven.


The Noble Phantasm Divina Commedia represents the eternal agony or joy. By saying its name, Archer selects a target and analyzes their past acts, sins and virtues (in the case of Servants, this include their acts during their lifetime), then, one of the layers of hell or paradise is choose from the results of the analysis. The result cannot be biased, so Archer is not able to choose it by her will, if the target is righteous and virtuous, the selected layer will probably be one from heaven.


Archer then creates a Reality Marble, generating an environment following the descriptions of Divine Comedy of the chosen layer, and everyone in the area of effect will be transported to the new battleground. The duration of the effects of this Noble Phantasm varies between 60 and 360 turns.

PS: The concept of "turn" used in the sheet comes from some sheets I saw from Zero or Stay Night, I don't remember well. I don't know what a turn is meant to mean in fate, but If I remember well, a turn is close to a second in D&D, so I used this concept. So read 1 turn = 1 second.

[Clockehwork]

Well, it is old and your first, so it's not exceptionally bad. My first ones were way worse. But she's definitely very overpowered.
Agility has no reason to be that high, and I'd even lower her other physical parameters as well. NP should be more in line with the suggestions below for those.
The classes don't really make sense; she should be a Caster, or if you wanted to get a bit creative a Rider. Archer is justified enough by turning her first NP into arrows, I suppose, and I can only assume it would be a spear or sword under the other classes, but she wasn't a warrior, so she shouldn't really be able to use any of the three effectively.
Magic Resistance is high for someone who never dealt with magic. I'd assume it's because of her supernatural nature in La Commedia but if so you should probably specify.
Personally, I would replace Divinity and Flying with another skill similar to Innocent Monster (though obviously let negative). Flying isn't really something worth a skill for anyway, especially if she has wings. Just let it be something she can do, like Saber walking on water.
Perception could probably be replaced with a low rank in Andersen's Human Observation.
B is a very high rank for just some love poems crystallized into flaming arrows.
La Commedia, besides being an honestly pretty boring and generic interpretation, shouldn't be on her sheet. It belongs on Dante's. If you want her to have an NP based on it then it should be about her part specifically, not the entire work.

[ZSB1999]

As for Lupa (sorry it took me so long to respond) I feel as though she is extremely powerful, but unlike most servant sheets (my Archer Mercurius Sheet among others) her strength is justified. Her stats are about equal to Romulus' which makes sense because she's A) a goddess of wolves, which would mean she's more suited for combat than, say, Demeter, and B) She's in the Berserker class. The noble phantasm is good, and justified at EX, as kiyohime's NP is arguably weaker and at the same rank. Overall a good sheet that does the wolf goddess, that helped create Rome, justice.

[Hakuro]

Well, it is old and your first, so it's not exceptionally bad. My first ones were way worse. But she's definitely very overpowered.
Agility has no reason to be that high, and I'd even lower her other physical parameters as well. NP should be more in line with the suggestions below for those.
The classes don't really make sense; she should be a Caster, or if you wanted to get a bit creative a Rider. Archer is justified enough by turning her first NP into arrows, I suppose, and I can only assume it would be a spear or sword under the other classes, but she wasn't a warrior, so she shouldn't really be able to use any of the three effectively.
Magic Resistance is high for someone who never dealt with magic. I'd assume it's because of her supernatural nature in La Commedia but if so you should probably specify.
Personally, I would replace Divinity and Flying with another skill similar to Innocent Monster (though obviously let negative). Flying isn't really something worth a skill for anyway, especially if she has wings. Just let it be something she can do, like Saber walking on water.
Perception could probably be replaced with a low rank in Andersen's Human Observation.
B is a very high rank for just some love poems crystallized into flaming arrows.
La Commedia, besides being an honestly pretty boring and generic interpretation, shouldn't be on her sheet. It belongs on Dante's. If you want her to have an NP based on it then it should be about her part specifically, not the entire work.

The parameters and the class stuff is more because she wasn't made thinking on the lady taking a weapon and fighting, more like an idealization of her as an angel fighting. And yeah, the only difference of her as a Lancer or Saber (besides the parameters) would be Vita Nuova assuming other forms.

I will probably reduce Magical Resistence to E (as I comparated her to other's Magic Resistance). I removed Divinity, but kept Flying and Perception, Human Observation is not much what I want. And a variation of Innocent Monster (like Curse of the Reader) would make sense, and I will add it.

I reduced La Vita Nuova to C (I don't think it is that weak to be D). And her version of Divina Commedia is a weakened version of what I plan for the Divina Commedia of a future Dante sheet, and considering how some Servant's Noble Phantasms always stretched a bit (Medusa riding Pegasus and having a Noble Phantasm called Andromeda, as an early exemple), I don't see much problem on her having it. Thank you for the feedback.

[JetKinen]

To be honest, i don't really get it why Vita Nuova are a bunch of exploding arrows.

Maybe its because i haven't read said work, but i must admit the transition is lost on me

[Hakuro]

To be honest, i don't really get it why Vita Nuova are a bunch of exploding arrows.

Maybe its because i haven't read said work, but i must admit the transition is lost on me

There is not really a reason for that. Since the first version I did of her, she used exploding arrows, but these were unnamed. Since it needed a name, I thought it would be much better for it having a name related to her than just a phrase in english (like Rule Breaker).

[AsGryffynn]

Annie's pic isn't working for me, but is she meant to be that heavy? I mean, I am both tall and fat and I weigh less than 87kg.

Might be a case of bad conversions. I will admit I can't use kg weight for jack. I only know good human weight to height rations in pounds...

Wiki just lists K&B's rank as C-. Not sure what you're using for reference here, sorry.

That might have been just me then.

We had a discussion about multiple minuses not that long ago. They aren't a thing. - is not a set modifier so it doesn't make any sense to have multiple.
And some of /GO's Servants are overpowered but they aren't "150 year old gunslinger with more than twice the agility of Diarmuid" overpowered, or "150 year old gunslinger who can always find a chance of surviving even when up against literally any force" overpowered, let alone both. You don't make characters who are "a bit on the overpowered side", you make people who should be low tier into people who could conceivably make it through the Fifth Grail War, which is not how this is supposed to work.

Isn't the whole point of Archer being there that "versatility>raw power"?

'Making it through the Fifth Grail War' probably isn't the best criteria to use for cases like this, I'd reckon. How a particular Servant would deal in a given War depends just as much on how their particular unique Skills and Noble Phantasms match up with rival Servants as raw physical stats and sheer hax. Take EMIYA for example, a comparatively low-tier Servant who managed to kill Herc up to five times and was one of the only people who could seriously threaten Gilgamesh.

I don't mind making an Annie that could put up a fight in the Fifth War (after all, pretty sure my Annie could, though she'd get creamed in a straight fight with the likes of Herc and Gil), but rather the particular way Amaranth happens to be doing that. Namely, EX Agility (which is absurd, EX denotes something literally unclassifiable, you better not hand that out without a damned good reason) and a higher-then-EMIYA rank in EOTM(T).

Her sharpshooting alone is enough to make her a considerable threat, which I'm totes fine with. It's the other stuff that poses a problem.

This. Also, I simply have NO IDEA how to make lower stat servants since I wind up feeling I always feel annoyed whenever I think "I want this character to fight X" and the dice roll literally gives me the finger because chances are not low. They are zero. And no servant should ever have anything lower than a one percent chance of victory under all circumstances.

The high EOTM was something that I thought of as the true reason her sharpshooting was so precise to knock off the ash of a lit cigar in someone's mouth with very old and imprecise pistols. That's the sort of sight you'd expect of 300+ year old Archers...

I agree. But the comparison was not just pulled out of the air, it's one that he has professed to shooting for in the past.

And you have a problem with that? I didn't think of that here if it makes you sleep better at night.

Now, the servants people asked for a few pages back, those that I wear as a sig... Now those would probably incinerate/expunge/eviscerate/execrate Gil, Karna and Solomon. It's literally the reason I didn't make their sheets. They are implausibly overpowered for Nasuverse (because they were original characters that are historical figures, so the amount of corruption and power creep is downright taxing)...

[Clockehwork]

Isn't the whole point of Archer being there that "versatility>raw power"?

The point of Archers is to have someone who can act autonomously from a distance rather than dragging you along and going into direct confrontations, and being able to hit hard with powerful Noble Phantasms. If you want to simplify it, then yes, you could say they were about "versatility". That doesn't mean that an Archer from 150 years ago should be anywhere near that agile, or have a skill on that level. Chiron, legendary tutor of heroes from the Age of the Gods, only has an A rank in EotM(T).

This. Also, I simply have NO IDEA how to make lower stat servants since I wind up feeling I always feel annoyed whenever I think "I want this character to fight X" and the dice roll literally gives me the finger because chances are not low. They are zero. And no servant should ever have anything lower than a one percent chance of victory under all circumstances.

There are numerous cases where Servants do and should have lower than a one percent chance of victory under various circumstances, even in the very first installment of the franchise, so...

The high EOTM was something that I thought of as the true reason her sharpshooting was so precise to knock off the ash of a lit cigar in someone's mouth with very old and imprecise pistols. That's the sort of sight you'd expect of 300+ year old Archers...

There are skills that actually affect aiming, you know, unlike Eye of the Mind, which has nothing at all to do with that. Clairvoyance, ie. the thing that you just described. Marksmanship, which both Billy and Anne/Mary have.

And you have a problem with that? I didn't think of that here if it makes you sleep better at night.

I don't have a problem, at least not with that part specifically, and what problems I do have I have no intention of getting into an argument about. The more important part of the statement was that you do it with people who should be low tier. The point of posting things here is to get feedback on them, so there's some feedback: if you can't stand to make Servants who are weak, you shouldn't make Servants out of people who should be weak.

[Bird of Hermes]

For Luperker, isn't Goddess Divine Core better than Divinity for her? Well, it is the skill of both Medusa's sisters who are technically divine spirits, but Artemis weirdly doesn't have it...

Goddess Divine Core is for the Gorgon sisters who were stated to be 'Perfect'. The thing about the Greek (and ripoff roman gods) Gods is that they reflect humanities flaws. Anyways, her thing is that her Divinity is sealed. As for Artemis, she hijacked Orion's contained, so she has his parameters and skills.

As for Lupa (sorry it took me so long to respond) I feel as though she is extremely powerful, but unlike most servant sheets (my Archer Mercurius Sheet among others) her strength is justified. Her stats are about equal to Romulus' which makes sense because she's A) a goddess of wolves, which would mean she's more suited for combat than, say, Demeter, and B) She's in the Berserker class. The noble phantasm is good, and justified at EX, as kiyohime's NP is arguably weaker and at the same rank. Overall a good sheet that does the wolf goddess, that helped create Rome, justice.

Thanks!
-----

Annie Oakley - A few things here. Firstly, I don't think all those minuses are necessary. Personally what I would do is look on Billy the Kid and Francia Drake for parameters and work off there. EoTM(T) and Agility need nerfing badly. Also, a Noble Phantasm is needed. If you have a problem with ideas, try something with trickshots and say they're derivative of Sir Tristan's Failnot and will always hit (like i did with Robin Hood/Maid Marian). Also i'd reduce her weight a bit

Beatrice Portinari - She seems alright, you've made the modifications and they work. With the second Noble Phantasm (which I do like), she seems like she'd be better suited to a Caster.

[NightEye]

Class: Archer
True Name: Oberon
Titles: King of the Fairies
Sex: Male
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral

Face Claim

Info

Oberon is best-known as a character in Shakespeare's comedy A Midsummer Night's Dream. In it he is the king of the fairies, and the husband of Titania. The origins of Oberon, though, lie not in folklore, but in John Bourchier, Lord Berners' translation of the 13th century French romance, Huon of Bordeaux, into English in 1534.

In it Oberon is a fairy king who lives in a wood that is full of strange and magical things. He is only three feet tall, and is deformed, with a crooked shoulder, yet with a face so handsome that no mortal man can remain unmoved by his beauty. Oberon wears a gown studded with precious stones, so bright that it shines like the sun. He carries a magic bow that can kill any animal he aims his arrows at, and a magic horn that can cure sickness and hunger when it is blown.

Oberon speaks to all who enter his wood, and anyone to whom he speaks is lost forever. Those who remain silent and do not speak to Oberon are beset by terrible storms.

Oberon turns out to be the son of Julius Caesar and a lady of the Secret Isle. All the fairies were invited to celebrate his birth, except one. The excluded fairy was so angry, that she cursed the baby; her curse made him stop growing when he was three years old. Later, relenting, she gave him great beauty. In a manner similar to the story of Sleeping Beauty, the other fairy guests gave him many magical gifts: clairvoyance, the ability to go wherever he wants to by wishing, the power to tame any creature, the power to make a castle grow at his command, to never age or look old, and when he leaves this world, to go straight to Paradise.

From Huon of Bordeaux, Robert Greene introduced Oberon into his play, James IV (1594). In this Oberon is again the fairy king, and very small, as are all the fairies.

It is possible that Berners' translation and Greene's play influenced Shakespeare in his creation of Oberon the fairy king in A Midsummer Night's Dream.

Oberon was used in several later works as well, including a masque by Ben Johnson for Prince Henry, James I's heir, and in Michael Drayton's poem Nymphidia (1627). He also appears in Carl Maria von Weber's opera Oberon, or the Elf King's Oath, an adaptation of Shakespeare's A Midsummer Night's Dream. The opera was first performed in 1826, at Covent Garden, London.

Strength: C
Endurance: B
Agility: A
Mana: A
Luck: B
Noble Phantasm: A

Class Skills

Magic Resistance: B+
Grants protection against magical effects.
Archer is all but immune to Magic.

Independent Action: A+
The ability to remain independent even when rejecting the prana supply from the Master.
Archer is theoretically capable of maintaining his existence indefinitely.

Personal Skills

Privilege of the Faerie King: EX
An ability that imbues its owner with Skills that are essential to ruling a kingdom of faeries. In cases when the Rank is А or above, even skills that can't be learned such as Divinity can acquired.
For Archer, the relevant skills are High-Speed Divine Words, Summoning Magic, Presence Concealment, Golden Rule, animal taming and many others.

Charisma: A
The natural talent to command an army. Increases the ability of allies during group battles.
Archer has ruled as King of the Faeries unopposed since the height of the Roman Empire.

Mystic Face: B
A spell inherent to the wielder’s face that activate when a person looks at it.
Archer’s Mystic Face makes him so that no mortal can remain unmoved by his beauty. As such, Archer is forced to wear a mask when he wishes to not enamor anyone.

Clairvoyance: A
Connotes superior visual perception and dynamic occipital capture, such as to supplement the long-range aiming of projectile weapons. At higher ranks, it is possible that the bearers of this skill have acquired such abilities as precognition ("future vision") and other forms of perception beyond standard eyesight (X-ray vision and so forth).
Blessing given to him as new-born child, Archer has the ability to see things that are beyond mortal eyes.

Noble Phantasms

King’s Bow: Whose Arrow Never Err: B+
An enchanted bow made from a white wood whose origin is unknown, decorated with blue enamel and gold engravings and the string seemingly made from a translucent fiber. The arrows fired from this bow can travel many leagues and strike with unerring accuracy.

Golden Cup: Source of Great Bounty: A
A small golden chalice, with the inscriptions of the faerie language engraved on it. With this noble phantasm, Archer is able use it on others to heal the most grievous of wounds and treat disease provided the person is judged by the cup as virtuous. To those the cup judges as wicked, its contents are as poisonous as the deadliest of venoms. As such, Archer laces half his arrows with contents of the cup. While some have compared this cup to the Holy Grail, it does not grant wishes. Outside of battle, Archer uses this cup as a source of food and drink.

===

This guy was surprisingly straight forward to do. I guess he's better suited as a caster but I just love that Oberon skin too much to not use it as a face claim.

[Bird of Hermes]

Seems cool, but a few things. I don't think Magic Resistance should be that high. Arturia has the dragon factor and is at A and I think dragons > faries. B is fine though. Also you muddled up the descriptions for Independent Action, A is a week while A+ is borderline indefinitely. Nice choice in Mystic Face as a skill, it's underused as a skill (but I have only one servant with that skill). Privilege of the Faerie King is imperial privilege so schange either the name or description, I made a variant with Connla and Prodigal Son as a skill.

Everything else is good though.

[NightEye]

Seems cool, but a few things. I don't think Magic Resistance should be that high. Arturia has the dragon factor and is at A and I think dragons > faries. B is fine though. Also you muddled up the descriptions for Independent Action, A is a week while A+ is borderline indefinitely. Nice choice in Mystic Face as a skill, it's underused as a skill (but I have only one servant with that skill). Privilege of the Faerie King is imperial privilege so schange either the name or description, I made a variant with Connla and Prodigal Son as a skill.

Everything else is good though.

With Magic Resistance, I'll meet you in the middle with B+, the fairies did make Avalon and Excalibur after all.
As for Independent action and Privilege of the Faerie King, fair nuf, I'll tweak the descriptions. Thanks for taking the time.

===

Okay, this next one is going to be a bit different. This guys is an attempt at making a Kojiro-style fake Servant, and I'm not completely sure if this counts as one.


Class: Saber
True Name: “Spiculus”
Sex: Male
Alignment: Lawful Neutral

Face Claim

Info

Summoned on the sands of Rome’s coliseum, Saber is supposed to be Spiculus, a renowned gladiator of the First Century AD who enjoyed a particularly close relationship with the (reportedly) evil Emperor Nero. When Nero was overthrown, she urged her aides to find Spiculus, as she wanted to die at the hands of the famous gladiator. But Spiculus couldn’t be found, and Nero was forced to take her own life.

There was a reason he couldn’t be found, as he was but merely a name and whose accomplishments are actually that of several gladiators. The man summoned was one of those gladiators, one that Nero had watched fight the most. He was the second son of an auxiliary soldier who retired as a Legion Aquilifer, born just outside of Capua. Like his father, he joined the army and served with distinction.

However, due to a bad business decision, he had acquired a massive debt and was forced to join a gladiator troop to earn enough denarii to pay it. He quickly acquainted himself with his profession, learning the weapons, techniques and tactics and reconditioning his body for the battles in the amphitheater. Starting off as a strong but rather boring gladiator, he honed his craft, adding the grandiose flair into his maneuvers and techniques needed to win the hearts of the people who came to watch.

Seeing the potential of this young but battle hardened man, Saber’s troop master gave him the name Spiculus, declaring him the replacement of the previous man who bore it (who was forced to retire due to a severe injury he sustained from his last fight). Together with his new name, Saber’s popularity soared, becoming the talk of both the plebeians and the patricians of Rome and becoming the Emperor’s favorite gladiator.

Saber was one of the few people who stayed loyal to Nero until death, having gotten to know her as Spiculus. He would have gladly taken her life but as fate would have it, he had retired as a gladiator a month before Nero been overthrown and was with his old legion in Northern Italy. When news of Nero’s downfall reached him, he raced back to Rome in secret. By the time he had arrived, Nero had been gone from the capital for weeks. Saber would eventually track his Emperor down but unfortunately Nero does not recognize him.

Thinking him and his companions as soldiers sent by the senate to kill; she declared, “"Hark, now strikes on my ear the trampling of swift-footed coursers!"

She then stabs her own throat with a dagger. A Legionary’s pugio dagger Saber had given her as Spiculus.
As Saber delicately cradles his emperor with a cloak, Nero utters her final words to him, “Too late. This is fidelity."

Strength: B
Endurance: B
Agility: C
Mana: E
Luck: A
Noble Phantasm: N/A

Class Skills

Magic Resistance: C
Grants protection against magical effects.
Saber gets the lowest skill rank possible for his class because he has never encountered magic in his life.

Riding: C
The ability to ride mounts.
Saber is capable of handling most mundane modes of transportation well.

Personal Skills

Death or Glory: A
Ability to continue battle that is based on enduring and ignoring pain rather than actually withstanding damage.
Saber has the ability to continue fighting despite sustaining wounds and injuries that can kill any other man a hundred times over, achieving this by keeping the pain contained or suppressed to manageable levels. Should Saber experience pain that exceeds a certain threshold, his body will quickly succumb to the collective injuries and will very likely lead to his death. However, if he is able to wound his killer in his dying breath, it is possible to postpone his death. Attacks during this state are counted as Rank A. The life of a gladiator is not an easy one, Saber has walked away from fights that should have killed him yet he is somehow the one raising his hands in victory and walking out of the arena on his two feet.

The Spectacle in Battle: A
A skill that makes an opponent think he/she sees an opening for attack when there is none and prevents any decrease in the effectiveness of a technique by the skill’s owner, regardless of how many times it is used against the same opponent.
Saber’s unorthodox fighting style, which to a traditionally trained warrior seems random and constantly opens him to attack, was developed in his years as a gladiator.

Eye of the Mind (True): B
A heightened capacity for observation, refined through experience.
Saber has fought as a gladiator for 5 years and an accumulated 25 years of a soldier of Rome before finally retiring, in those years he has fought countless men and beasts with various fighting styles and battle configurations. This gave Saber an excellent understanding on how people fight and have allowed him to master the art of controlling a battle with your wits.

The Honor of the Battered: C+
A skill that makes those who have it become more powerful as they are inflicted more pain. The cost used to heal injuries via Magecraft or similar methods are reduced.
Saber doesn’t actually get stronger when he gets injured, instead his mind becomes more focused, better synchronizing his experienced mind and well-conditioned body for the task at hand and seize the day.

===

Personally, I'm not really convinced I got the whole Fake Servant thing correctly with this but hey it's a good change of pace.

[Crying]

Huh, I was planning on doing a Spiculus sheet myself, though I'm nowhere near actually writing it.

Well, you got the idea of "that person did not exist, they were actually a bunch of different people absorbed into one legend" right, you're sort of missing the "a skill that would be a Noble Phantasm if they were a real Heroic Spirit" part of Sasaki. Still, not too bad man/girl/whatever.

[AsGryffynn]

The point of Archers is to have someone who can act autonomously from a distance rather than dragging you along and going into direct confrontations, and being able to hit hard with powerful Noble Phantasms. If you want to simplify it, then yes, you could say they were about "versatility". That doesn't mean that an Archer from 150 years ago should be anywhere near that agile, or have a skill on that level. Chiron, legendary tutor of heroes from the Age of the Gods, only has an A rank in EotM(T).

Now, the rank being too high I can understand, but...

There are numerous cases where Servants do and should have lower than a one percent chance of victory under various circumstances, even in the very first installment of the franchise, so...

Archer could've won all HGW battles if he used his head and wasn't busy trying to commit time travelling suicide. Assassin and True Assassin are the closest thing I can come up with and I am sure those had a low chance, but not a negligible one.

There are skills that actually affect aiming, you know, unlike Eye of the Mind, which has nothing at all to do with that. Clairvoyance, ie. the thing that you just described. Marksmanship, which both Billy and Anne/Mary have.

I always thought of it as an sniper usable ability, but suit yourself...
I don't have a problem, at least not with that part specifically, and what problems I do have I have no intention of getting into an argument about. The more important part of the statement was that you do it with people who should be low tier. The point of posting things here is to get feedback on them, so there's some feedback: if you can't stand to make Servants who are weak, you shouldn't make Servants out of people who should be weak.[/QUOTE]

Perhaps we simply have a different understanding of the word "weak". Strong servants in my mind are theoretically far more powerful than this... And depending on whether people here wouldn't mind seeing a "reincarnated servant", I might show what I consider a strong servant.

[RoydGolden]

Now, the rank being too high I can understand, but...



Archer could've won all HGW battles if he used his head and wasn't busy trying to commit time travelling suicide. Assassin and True Assassin are the closest thing I can come up with and I am sure those had a low chance, but not a negligible one.



I always thought of it as an sniper usable ability, but suit yourself...

Perhaps we simply have a different understanding of the word "weak". Strong servants in my mind are theoretically far more powerful than this... And depending on whether people here wouldn't mind seeing a "reincarnated servant", I might show what I consider a strong servant.

There's a difference between 'a Servant that can hold their own in a Grail War' and 'one that's horrendously wanked almost beyond recognition'. Speaking of which, what is even with the EX Agility? Whoever heard of Annie even being famous for her speed? I understand you'd want her to maneuverable and quick on her feet to compensate for physical weakness, but Agility (EX) is just... crazy. At that point saying her speed is literally unquantifiable. Can you see why that's not fitting for Annie's legend?

Despite it all though, I wouldn't necessarily mind seeing your other 'overpowered' sheets (one of which is El Cid, I presume). I don't mind OP characters necessarily, as long they have the lore to back it up (i.e a war hero from the last hundred years shouldn't be able to outclass Heracles or Arturia in raw power) and are at least reasonably tasteful. And I wouldn't mind a preview on some of the 'reincarnated myths' which are going to show up in your story. Which, BTW, I PMed you some critique on that story a few weeks ago which you never got back to me on. No urgency, I'm just curious whether you noticed it or not.

[SpoonyViking]

Archer could've won all HGW battles if he used his head and wasn't busy trying to commit time travelling suicide.

The fact that he dies to Herakles in "Fate" even when trying his damnedest to win is proof that isn't true, and he's just one example.
Unless you used "could have won" in the sense that he had a chance of winning instead of "he certainly would have won", in which case I agree.

[ZSB1999]

Also E rank luck = Gae Bolg GG. Lancer beats Archer almost every time.

[RoydGolden]

Also E rank luck = Gae Bolg GG. Lancer beats Archer almost every time.

What? Isn't it stated somewhere in the VN that Archer (assuming you mean EMIYA) could circumvent Gae Bolg (regular version) by having swift enough footwork so as to get out of the effective radius whenever Cu tried to use it? Sure I've heard that somewhere...

[asterism42]

Gae Bolg can't be dodged? Since, y'know, it hits you before it's been thrust.